Warning: None. Rated T.

A/N: Thanks again everyone for your constant reviews and interest. I love seeing the range of emotions chapters might provoke. Here's one I think you might like.

This chapter's song title is "If You Love Her" by Forest Blakk

Chapter 4 – If You Love Her

Wednesday – 7:00pm (Somewhere between Boise and Seattle - 4 hours after the crash)

Mark and Cristina had gotten Derek back to the camp site just before the sun had set. Luckily, everyone was accounted for and currently stable and doing well. The temperature had dropped since the sun went down, and he was glad they were able to get a fire set just before the last of daylight went out.

Meredith was content having Derek right back at her side. She draped his jacket over his body as they rested against a big fallen log next to the fire. He had changed Arizona's bandages again as soon as they got back, a little worried that bugs and insects were trying to burrow their way into her wound. They would have to attend to her bandage more often to keep it as clean as possible. She was still in considerable pain, and with their morphine supply running low and unsure how long it might be before they might be rescued, everyone was in the understanding that it needed to be conserved to last longer.

Cristina took a spot next to Arizona to keep and eye on her injuries as well as keep her warmer throughout the night. Lexie had taken the other side next to Derek, keeping herself close to the fire, huddled under one of the blankets that she and Meredith had found when rummaging through the wreckage.

Mark took his place next to her, aware that her glance would look in his direction every few seconds. She looked so unsure and weary that he was afraid that anything he said or did would set her off running into the night into unknown territory.

"I should check your bandages," he informed, his voice low.

"I'm fine," she replied deadpan.

"Humor me." He pushed, his eyes raking back over her bandage on her head and her wrapped arm.

Lexie turned her head to look at him for a long moment, before finally nodding. He scooted closer so that he could reach up to check the bandage on her head first. He slowly pulled back the initial tape to assess the cut.

"It's looking good. I need to clean around it," he surmised.

"Ok," she agreed quietly.

He reached back over to the only two trauma bags they were able to recover in the wreckage, pulling out the saline solution and fresh gauze to start attending to the cut.

She winced. "Ow."

"Sorry." He paused. "How's the arm?"

"It's fine, Mark," her tone bilious.

"I can see your in pain, even though you are trying to hide it or make anyone believe otherwise," he observed.

"Mark…"

His hands stilled. "Is it really that bad for me to want to help you?"

"Yes," she snapped.

Their gazes locked; each holding fast willing the other to look away. After a moment, he sighed, and turned his look back to the cut so he could finish taping it back to her forehead. He dropped his hands back to his side. Lexie pulled the jacket up around her shoulders.

"At some point we have to talk about us," he said, trying again.

"There is no us," she said flatly.

"But you wanted there to be an us again."

She closed her eyes and pursed her lips. "Forget it. It was a stupid thing to say and do. You're with Julia and your happy with her. So, can we please leave it at that and not bring this up again," she said more as a statement then a question.

"No, we're not going to forget it," he bit back.

"Ugh! Mark, just leave it alone," she growled, immediately getting to her feet and walking away from the camp.

"Lexie!" Meredith called after her.

"I got her," Mark said grumpily, getting to his feet.

"Mark, I really don't think it's best—"

"Stay out of this, Big Grey," he cut in.

"Meredith," Derek said, putting his hand on her shoulder when she had been about to respond. "Let them work through this."

Mark took off after her. "You don't get to walk away this time," he said when he caught up to her.

She turned; her eyes already glassy. "Sometimes it's what's best for both. Sometimes, someone has to be the strong one to walk away."

"No, that's being a coward."

She blinked; her eyes widened. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me," he pushed, stepping forward. "Your running, because this conversation is going to be difficult and you know it."

"No." She licked her lips, and looked away. "I'm shutting it down, because if I think your about to say what I think you might—I don't want to hear it, because I know it will be because theirs any extremely high chance that we are going to die out here. That's why I am shutting it down."

She went to stalk past him, but his hand snaked out and grabbed her upper arm. "You're not going anywhere, until you hear what I have to say, whether you want to or not. You owe me that."

Tuesday – 8:00am (Boise Memorial Hospital)

Derek, Meredith, Cristina, Arizona, Mark, and Lexie were standing outside of the surgery room discussing the final placements once they were inside and ready to start. They were breaking up into teams of two, to each tackle aspects of the conjoined-twins case.

"Ok, this is how it's going to go. Meredith you with me to tackle the neuro and nerves, Cristina you are going to partner with Arizona for cardio, and Lexie you will be partnering with Mark," Derek stated.

Lexie's face went white as a ghost. She had been on Derek's service for weeks, and now he was working with Meredith again after they had agreed to not work together anymore. She scowled at Derek guessing the reason why he had suddenly changed the partnerships.

"But…but..."

"Alright, let's scrub in and save these babies lives," Derek said.

They were two hours into the surgery, when it was Lexie and Mark's turn to step in and handle their portion of the case. "You're doing good," he commented, after about thirty minutes into their surgery.

"Thank you," she said, looking up quickly before back down at the baby's arm.

"You still have the hands and knack for plastics," he added.

"Yeah, I don't know," she brushed off immediately.

"Is that because it would mean you would have to work closely with me?"

"Mark…"

"I'm just saying. You've been avoiding me ever since—"

"Can we not talk about that right now," she cut in, lowering her voice. "I'm trying to pay attention, and make sure this is done right, and I really don't need any distractions."

His eyes looked up to hers, and she looked back before breaking eye contact again. She was reduced to stolen glances for their entire part of their three-hour portion of their surgery. She had shut down the conversation claiming she didn't want any distractions, and even though she was looking down at a large gash in the side of the current baby they were working on, along with repairing its arm, all she could think about was Mark and all of her regrets when it came to them and their relationship.

She couldn't help but think back to all of the times he had let her know that he loved her. That he had still wanted her and that she made him happy.

She walked into an x-ray room, unaware that Mark had been sitting there holding Sofia while she slept. It had been the first time that Lexie had really gotten up close to see his baby girl. How good he had been with her.

"You seem really happy," she noted.

"I am," he replied, giving her a smile. "I have everything I've always wanted." He paused and looked at her, his expression filled with longing and hopefulness, before he looked back down at his daughter Sofia. "Almost."

She hadn't been expecting that, because even though she was dating Jackson and they were having fun, her heart always seemed to beat a little faster, flutter a little harder, whenever she was near Mark Sloan. It was as if her own body betrayed her, constantly screaming at her that he was the one she was supposed to be with. He was the one that she needed. He was her soulmate.

Her mouth went dry, and she needed to put distance between herself and him—because in that moment—no matter how many reasons she tried to tell herself that they didn't work—that they didn't want the same things—it didn't matter. She always wanted—always craved—Mark Sloan.

It was after Jackson had broken up with her because he already knew what she was too chicken to tell herself—that she was in love with Mark. That not seeing him every day was a constant reminder that she was making a regret by not telling him the truth about her feelings.

Lexie was in an office reviewing old case files and journals when Mark walked into the room.

"I need you, Lex."

She dropped the cases material from her hands back on the desk in shock, confusion, and surprise. Her mouth fell open as she looked back at the door, where he was standing, his hands inside his white lab coat. She thought her heart was stopping right there in that moment and that she would need a defibrillator to get it going again.

"Hi…what?"

"I need you," he repeated.

He was doing a skin graft, and since all the residents—his plastics posse, Jackson Avery—was off taking the boards, he was gifted with an idiot intern that thought debriding the necrotic tissue was something out of a nine-inch nails album.

In truth—outside of the fact that his intern really was an idiot—he missed talking and working with Lexie. Before they were together, during their relationship, and after, once he let her go because she was with Jackson. Because he backed off.

"Your just sad because Jackson is off taking his boards," she said.

"He and I work well together. We understand each other." He paused and looked at her fondly. "Like you and I used too, you know?" He grinned. "So, I need you."

He thought her face looked a little brighter at him saying that. Her bottom lip fell open, before she broke the contact. She had turned him down because she was doing research on Derek's neuro cases and indicated she would have to pull an all-nighter just to complete her research... While a part of him loved having Jackson, there were times he missed Lexie and what they could have done together had she kept her interest in plastics.

He shrugged. "Alright. I thought it would be fun...you and I working together again. But if your busy..."

He turned to walk away, and when she called him back, he broke into a grin at hearing her call his name.

"You should check out the latest nine-inch nails album. It is pretty...fresh."

He tried to hide his disappointment. Maybe Callie and Arizona had been right. When he had heard that Lexie and Jackson broke up and she had said she missed him that maybe he was reading too much into it. These couple of times he was trying to outreach—between walking with her to the parking lot—before she changed her mind to go back and do charting—and now...maybe it was just a fluke. Maybe she had just been down and needed a friend. They could be friends. Right?

As they wrapped up their teamwork portion and moved back towards the room so Arizona and Cristina were now in the lead, he stood next to her.

"I would really love it if we could find sometime to talk," he whispered.

"There's nothing really to talk about," she replied.

He looked back to her his brows scrunched together. "I think we have a lot to talk about."

"Excuse me," she said, before walking out of the surgical room and headed to the bathroom to pull herself together.

Monday – 2:00pm (Seattle Grace Mercy West Hospital)

Mark entered into the attending lounge finding Callie sitting on the couch, a sandwich in her hand and a magazine in her other.

"Good. I need your help," he said.

"Arizona and I are not babysitting tonight. You promised," she said without taking her eyes from her reading material.

"No, that's not what I need to talk to you about."

She set aside the magazine and took another bite of her turkey sandwich. "Jeez, what is it? You look like the whole world is weighing on your shoulders."

"Lexie and Julia," he answered.

Her forehead creased. "Is it about Lexie or is it about Julia?"

"Lexie's in love with me," he stated.

Callie chuckled. "Tell me something we don't know. She's always going to have some kind of feelings for you, Mark. You two had a meaningful relationship."

He shook his head in exasperation. "No, she's in love with me," he emphasized on the "in" part.

Callie studied his face. "Oh. Oh…." she repeated letting it hang in the air. "Yeah, that's a problem." She stood and went to grab herself a cup of water from the water cooler in the corner of the room.

"What do I do?" he asked.

"What do you want to do?" she countered.

"I love Lexie," he said.

"And Julia?"

"She wants to give me everything I want," he considered.

Callie crossed her arms. "Uh-huh. And you don't see the difference?"

He met her gaze, confusion crossing his features. "What difference?"

"That one you were easily able to say you were in love with, and the other you are just debating that she could give you the things you want. I didn't hear anything about you being in love with Julia," she clarified.

"We're taking things slow, and Lexie is…Lexie. We have a past." he argued.

"We all have pasts, Mark. Before Arizona, there was Erica. I'm not in love with Erica. I have no interest in ever wanting to go back and be with Erica, even if she walked in those doors right now and told me she was madly in love with me."

Mark sat, and rested his elbows on his knees. "That's because you weren't meant to be with Erica and you and Arizona are married and happy."

"Mark, as long as I have known you to be an actual adult—in an adult relationship—it's always been Lexie in your eyes. It's always been her that you love," she said matter-of-factly.

"And what happens if I give up Julia and Lexie scares again? Bolts and leaves me—again? Decides that after a couple of years as a surgeon she doesn't want kids, and we end up like Cristina and Owen at each other's throats because we weren't compatible outside of sex and wanted different things."

Callie inhaled a deep breath. "Ok, first, Lexie is someone that wants kids. She just didn't want them at twenty-four and being a grand-mother at twenty-six without even being included on the decision."

"Yeah, that was bad," he agreed.

Callie held up her pointer and middle finger. "Two, you and Lexie are nothing like Owen and Cristina. Cristina is only happy when she is doing surgery and is just as dark and twisty as Meredith. Lexie is the complete opposite." She added her ring finger. "Third, sometimes, when it comes to love it's about taking that leap of faith and trusting the rest will fall into place."

She came over to sit down next to him, her hand covering his. "I'm scared of getting my heart broken again," he confessed. He shook his head. "Damn, I'm acting like the girl again."

She smiled. "Scared is good. Scared means you love deeply. Do you love Lexie? Can you imagine your life without her in it?"

He shook his head immediately. "No."

"Then I think you have your answer," she replied, squeezing his hand.

Wednesday – 7:00pm (Somewhere between Boise and Seattle - 4 hours after the crash)

"Lexie…"

Her hand was on her eyes, as she turned away from him. "Mark, please just go away," she begged.

"No, I don't think I will. You've been avoiding me, and cutting me off, and not letting me get to say what I want to say," he fired back.

She turned to face him. "If you had something important to say, you would have said it already. I already know what you are going to say."

He arched a brow. "Do you?"

She let out a breath, and turned away from him again. He walked over and grabbed hold of her good upper arm and turned her back to him.

"Mark…"

"Just stop. Just listen. I gave you the chance to tell me what you wanted; all I am asking is for you to give me that same courtesy in return."

She gave him a long look, before she resigned and nodded.

"I love you, Lexie Grey. Despite what you think, I am not saying this because of pity. I am not saying I love you, because we were in a plane crash. I'm saying I love you, because I do. I always have, and I always will," he said.

She pressed her lips together, her eyes searching his gaze as he looked back at her, his expression so steadfast as he declared his feelings for her, it made her breath catch in her throat.

"When you left after Sloan, I tried to tell myself that what we had wasn't real. That what we had shared together hadn't been love. Because I didn't want to have to walk around feeling like you had ripped a hole in my chest. Nothing felt the same." He paused, looking off in the distance before his eyes met hers again. "So, I slept around. I figured if I went back to before you, then it would confirm that what we had wasn't special."

"When you told me about Karev and that you started dating him, it gutted me. When I knew you had moved on, and possibly fell in love with him, it killed me. I didn't want to sleep around. I wanted you back, because I realized no matter what I tried to tell myself, or make myself believe, there was no running from the fact that I am in love with you."

She had been guarded with her emotions up until now, but as he went on explaining himself and his feelings, her face started to morph, and something brightened in her beautiful, radiant eyes.

"I was so grateful when you gave me a second chance. I hadn't planned on having a kid with Callie. I can't be sorry about it, because I have never been happier then having Sofia in my life, but I regretted losing you…again. It broke my heart, and whatever was left of me, crashed and burned, when you walked away that second time, Lex," he said his voice pained, the grief written all over his face.

"Then you got with Jackson." He closed his eyes, trying think how he would express his next words. "I hated him at first. I hated him and I was jealous of him, because deep down…he was everything you deserved. He was everything you wanted. He's a brilliant surgeon, close to your age, and he comes from a good family, that I know would be lucky to have you and call you, their daughter."

He hesitated a beat, dragging his hand through his hair. He was aware that his voice was turning rough and raspy now.

"I realized that this time…this time, I was finally losing you for good. I loved you, but you seemed to love him. You asked me to leave you alone. You asked me to let you go. I didn't want too. Everything in me was screaming to make you realize that we were meant to be. That it was always you and me. But I could see it wasn't what you wanted…so I let you go, Lex. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do, but I let you go…because it was what you wanted me to do."

Tears were streaming down her cheeks; her lips were turned down into a frown. When her eyes met his, he felt like someone had eviscerate him into a pile of dust.

"I moved on to Julia. I did what you asked. She's a good woman. A good doctor. She's good to Sofia, and Arizona and Callie love her. She wants to give me everything I want. She wants to marry me and give me babies. Everything I ever wanted, Lex. She's loyal, and I know that she's in for the long haul. She's safe. She's good. She's good for me," he recognized.

Lexie's bottom lip trembled, and he hated that he was the one that was doing it to her. But he had to be honest with her. She had to know the truth with everything out in the open. She wrapped her good arm around her midsection, her eyes sad, her jaw set into a thin hard line.

"There's only one problem when it comes to Julia. She isn't you." He stepped closer to her, her eyes flickering up towards his. "Even though on paper, I should probably be with her, my heart wants you. It's always wanted you. I don't want to settle on happiness. I want it to be earth shattering, take your breath away, get up in the morning because your mine, love and happiness. I know that can only come from you, Little Grey."

A blissful bright smile was fixed on her lips and face, as her bottom lip fell open. He took another step until their bodies were almost touching.

"You left me once Grey. I survived. When you left me twice, it almost killed me. So, I am asking you…if there is any doubt in your mind that there is a possibility you might not want me…tell me now. If things like marriage and kids are not something you would want with me in the future—walk away from me now. It would hurt like hell, but I think I could let you go if I knew these things wouldn't make you happy or were what you wanted."

His hand reached up to her cheek, wiping away a tear that had escaped her eye with the pad of his thumb.

"If, however, these are things that you do want…if I am what you want…I want you to know… I know who you are, Lex. If you're going through, you're worst, I want to go through it with you. You make me happier than anything I've ever known. If I can have a part in—in making you happy for the rest of our lives... that's all I wanna do. That's all I want to do for the rest of our lives. I love you, Lex. I'll love you now and forever, even if you can't love me back."

Lexie gave him a smile, one that lit up her whole face. "I love you, too, Mark." She licked her lips. "Yes. I love you now, and I will love you forever too." Her hand came up to rest on his cheek. "I just want you. That's all I want."

His mouth curved into a smile. He lowered his head until he was mere inches from her lips. "Good. Because when we get back, I promise you, I'm going to want to marry you. And someday, we're going to give Sofia brothers and sisters," he added.

He lips stretched into a grin. "Okay."

His hand gripped her waist, pulling her body flesh against his. His grip was so tight, he thought he would burst from happiness that she was back in his arms, right where she belongs.

"I love you," he said.

"I love you, too," she replied.

He kissed her like he hadn't kissed her in years. Her soft pliant lips meeting his firm, skilled ones. She had missed his kisses. The way he would take control and bring her to her knees. The butterflies in her stomach intensified, and now more than ever she had wished they weren't in some godforsaken woods.

She pulled back briefly when the need for air became apparent, his arm around her waist tightening to keep her close to him. As if she would want to pull away. In these brief moments together, the world could be crashing down around them and all she saw was him. Them.

They smiled at each other. His lips pressed against hers, and for a minute she gave him everything she had and everything she ever felt for him in that kiss.

She couldn't help but feel that everything was going to be ok. It just had to be.

Thursday – 6:00am (Somewhere between Boise and Seattle - 18 hours after the crash)

Lexie stirred in Mark's arms as the sun slowly started to come up. Sleeping on the hard exterior of the woods had not been the most comfortable thing— especially with a bum shoulder—but she couldn't complain when her back was against his chest, his arms around her waist as they fell asleep from the night before.

The small fire they had been able to build with the tiny box of matches—part of the supplies they were able to recover from the crash—had done little to provide them all warmth, but between the jackets, few blankets they rounded up, and Mark's arms around her, she along with Meredith, Derek, Cristina, and Arizona were able to make do for the night.

A smile crept on her lips as she thought back to last night. Her and Mark had come back to the group, her hand in his, in too much of a good mood to even deal with Cristina's teasing and gloomy temperament. Still, she replayed it over in her head.

"Oh, good. Your back and your together again. It's about time," Cristina said sarcastically, lifting her jacket up to her chest.

"You guys, ok?" Meredith asked.

Lexie looked to Mark. "Yeah, we're good."

"It's about time," Derek added.

"Yeah, which means every one of you needs to hang on, because I expect you to attend our wedding," Mark said.

"And getting married," Meredith noted with surprise.

"Oh, good. Another wedding," Cristina mumbled.

Arizona smiled. "Congrats," she hissed through her pain.

Lexie felt bad for Arizona. She had the worst of the injuries, and her color was getting paler as the hours had ticked by. The longer her open wound went untreated, the more she was susceptible to all kinds of bacteria's and complications.

"Robbins?" Mark said with an air of concern.

She lifted her hand. "I'm ok, Mark."

Lexie could tell that Mark worried about Arizona as well, but with-it being nightfall, there was nothing they could do now, but settle in and hope that come morning, a search party was already underway and looking for them.

She and Mark had stayed up later then the rest who had drifted off to sleep, as he held her wrapped in his arms, his lips by her ear as they just talked and whispered their love and affections for each other. The last thing she had remembered before drifting to sleep was hearing him tell her he loved her, a smile on her lips.

Her brows furrowed when she attempted to snuggle into his chest and arms, but his arm fell to his side.

"Mark?" she said groggily.

When she got no response, she shifted—on her bad arm— letting out a gasp from the pain, to look up at his face. At first glance, he appeared as if he was sleeping, but she could tell right away that he wasn't asleep. His color was too pale, and his breathing was extremely shallow.

"Mark," she called again her tone alarmed.

When he didn't stir, her adrenaline spiked, forgetting all about her arm and pain as she pushed to her knees so she could check him out. Without her weight on him, he slumped to the side, his head falling back onto the log.

"Mark!" She shook his shoulders, but was getting no response.

"Lexie?" Meredith turned to look at her.

"N-n-no…Mark, wake up," she said again.

Cristina was at her side in seconds. Mark stayed frozen. "Mark, wake up," Cristina ordered in a calm and assertive voice.

"What's going on?" Derek asked, throwing his jacket off him and sitting up.

"Mark's not waking up," Lexie said, letting out a long agonizing cry.

"Did he mention any injuries?" Derek asked.

"No, he wasn't…" Lexie's voice trailed off.

Cristina had already checked his pulse and eyes. "He's pulse is low. What Lexie, what is it going on in your head?" Cristina asked.

Her hand flew to her mouth. "He would sometimes hold his chest, and I would see him wince, but I didn't think anything of it…I didn't notice it because…"

The information was all Cristina needed to grab his scrubs and rip opens his shirt. There is a collective gasp in the group as they are stunned by what she found. Mark has severe chest wounds. Various red and purple contusions covering the entire left side of his chest.

"Oh, my god," Lexie cried. "Why didn't he say something?"

Cristina laid him flat on his back. "Lexie, grab the medical bag," she ordered.

Lexie did as she instructed, as Derek and Meredith came over to assist. Derek doing what he could just from initial signs of his neurology exam. "It doesn't appear to have any issues on my end," he breathed a sigh of relief.

"Is…is he going to be, ok?" Lexie asked.

Cristina didn't look at her or answer her, but she watched as Cristina's eyes met her sisters. Lexie turned her attention to Meredith.

"Mer?"

Meredith looked back at her sister; her expression schooled. "We don't know, Lexie. But we will do everything we can with what we have to make sure he stays with us."

"Don't say, do," she demanded powerfully.

Lexie looked back at the man she loved who was unconscious, repeating over and over that he had to come back to her, because she didn't know what she would do, if he didn't.

A/N: LOL – I know, not an ideal ending. I know how much everyone loves a good cliff hanger. Appreciate your thoughts and comments. ;)