I didn't plan on this update taking so long, but real life is really kicking my butt. I am still writing when I can, and updates will be a little slow, but they will come. For those of you waiting for a Saviour update, it's about halfway there and I hope to have it up before the end of the month.
Thank you for all your kind words and messages, and of course for your patience. I hope this update was worth the wait.
Rachel's anxiety about visiting the new schools was obvious the next morning, but Shelby did her best to calm her down and reassure her that nothing bad would happen. Her first meeting was at 9.30 and the school was just a ten minute walk from Shelby's house so she decided not to take the car, hoping the walk would help the girl burn off a little of her nervous energy.
They were greeted warmly by the office staff and straight away they asked if Rachel wanted to help them for a while, 'so you don't have to sit through the grownups boring talk.' Rachel looked up at Shelby, not sure what the right decision was but Shelby just smiled softly, "it's up to you, if you want to come in with me you can, but if you want to go help then I'll come get you when I'm done."
"Will it really be boring?" Rachel asked quietly.
"It'll be a lot of talking" Shelby explained, "I have a lot of questions to ask so I can make sure you'll be happy here."
"Okay" Rachel thought for a moment, "I think I want to help. Can I do that?"
"Sure you can" Shelby helped Rachel shrug off her jacket, "is there anything you want to know about this school? Any questions you want me to ask for you?" Rachel was confused, surely she didn't get a say, she just had to do as she was told, it wasn't up to her. She couldn't understand why Shelby would ask her that. Maybe it was a trick question. Was she meant to have been thinking of a question to ask? Was she meant to know what was going on? Shelby saw the worry etched across Rachel's brow and gently called her name to break her from her thoughts, "it's okay if you don't have any questions" she told her, "but it's okay if you do, you don't need to worry about it."
"I can't think of anything" there was a slight hint of panic to Rachel's voice.
"That's okay" Shelby reassured her, "if you think of anything, even after we've left, you can let me know and I'll find out the answers okay?"
Rachel nodded, looking down at her feet as she sat beside Shelby, everything felt so confusing, so many things were happening and she felt like she couldn't keep up, she didn't know what to think or how to act. She knew Shelby had told her the rules and they'd made a list of punishments Rachel might face, but none of them had really seemed 'that' bad, not in comparison to punishments Rachel had faced in the past. And Shelby had found out that Rachel had been put in time out at school but she'd been angry with the teacher, not with Rachel. Shelby was calm and patient and if she was honest, Rachel was scared of that, scared that she didn't know how angry Shelby could get. Because she would get angry. Rachel knew it was only a matter of time until she did something to push Shelby over the edge and she had no idea how the woman would react to that.
Shelby saw Rachel slip back into her head but she didn't say anything, she knew she needed to get the girl into therapy but she also knew that she was at risk of throwing too much at her too soon. If she absolutely had to she'd take her to therapy right now, but ideally she wanted her to have a couple of weeks to settle in both to her new home and now to her new school. She said goodbye to Rachel when she was called back to speak to the principal, promising that she wouldn't leave her, that she'd collect her from the office before she left.
After the formalities were over and the principal explained a little about the school, Shelby got down to business, "Rachel has a reputation at her school for being 'disruptive' and she quite frequently gets taken out of her classroom. I think some of her bad behaviour comes from anger and frustration that she's struggling with the work and not being helped, but if something like that happens here, what would you do?"
"We operate a warning system, she'd get two warnings and then if she continued being disruptive she'd be taken to our reflection room for the rest of the class period. If we found she was needing to use the reflection room on a frequent basis then we'd bring you in to try and come to some other solution." The principal explained.
"She'd only be out of the class for that period?" Shelby asked, "and what exactly is the reflection room?"
"Just for that period" the man nodded, "and I can show you the room and give you a tour before you leave if you'd like? But its a classroom, we don't ask for silence but we do ask that the children try and be quiet in there. There are quiet activities for them to do and we hope that they use the time to think about what they've done and how, if the situation repeated in the future, they could react differently to avoid being taken out of the classroom."
"And are they supervised?"
"Always" the principal nodded, "and the supervising member of staff will talk to the child, providing the child cooperates, to talk through what happened and what they could have done differently."
"Okay" Shelby nodded, "if Rachel is enrolled here, I think she'd benefit from seeing the reflection room and having it explained to her beforehand. At her last school, when she was taken out of class she had to sit at a table in the corridor on her own, sometimes all day."
"We would never do that to a child" the principal was just as shocked as Shelby, "we try to diffuse all situations within the classroom but where that's not possible we use the reflection room, and, on the rare occasion we've had a child that hasn't calmed down in the reflection room, or who has become more upset, we've called their parent or guardian to come in. Whilst I've been here that's happened with three different students. Two were calmed down by the adult that came in, and went back to class but one was taken home to calm down and came back to a clean slate the next morning"
Satisfied with that answer Shelby moved onto her next point, talking about how she thought Rachel was probably behind her peers, how she'd struggled with the literacy task given to her the previous day and how she'd admitted that she didn't know how to write her name until Shelby had showed her.
The principal reassured Shelby that Rachel wasn't the first student who'd need to catch up with their class, and said they'd work with her on that, the man told Shelby that they could arrange one to one support for Rachel in her weakest areas and that all the classes were tailored to suit mixed ability levels, "sometimes a class will be doing several activities at a time, all around the same subject or topic, but at various levels of difficulty. We also encourage children to help each other, we often find our students learn better from their peers, we sit our classes in groups of four to six and apart from things like silent reading, it's encouraged that they work together to problem solve. Obviously the teaching staff will help if a child is struggling but we find that the children seem to enjoy working together to help one another."
Shelby smiled and nodded, the thought of Rachel actually sitting in a classroom, being educated, helping and being helped by her peers made her happy. She didn't want Rachel to ever have to worry about having to sit alone in a corridor again. "That sounds great, thank you".
They spoke for a while longer, Shelby seemed impressed, not only did the principal have reassuring answers to all of Shelby's questions, when Shelby mentioned that she'd be temporarily homeschooling Rachel, he'd called for a member of staff to bring in some work books, explaining that they were for the grade below Rachel's, but he thought that, not only would it give her the opportunity to catch up a little, but she was less likely to get frustrated by finding the work too hard. "You might already have this in hand" he told Shelby, "but I'd also suggest getting Rachel's eyes tested if she hasn't seen an optician lately. It's surprising how many children struggle with reading and writing, until they get glasses. It might not be an issue for Rachel but it's an easy thing to rule out."
"I hadn't thought of that" Shelby admitted, "but I'll make her an appointment when we get home, I want her to have the best chance of reaching her potential."
"I understand that" he nodded, "and having support at home will help Rachel a great deal. Now, if you don't have any more questions, why don't we go get Rachel and I'll take you both on a tour of the school."
Shelby had decided almost instantly that this was the school she wanted Rachel to attend, it was the school Sarah had recommended too so, after she and Rachel were both shown around the school, Shelby filled in the paperwork that would begin the process of enrolling Rachel at that school.
She cancelled her appointment with the second school and instead, managed to get an appointment with the paediatrician she used that same afternoon, it was the same doctor Shelby had taken all the children in her care to and she understood that she needed to be calm and patient with the children in Shelby's care, and she was always flexible with appointments. Luckily she had a cancellation right before lunch so Shelby didn't have to worry that she was keeping her behind after hours.
"Do I need to get a shot?" Rachel asked nervously as she sat next to Shelby in the waiting room.
"I don't want to make any promises, but, unless you've missed something then you shouldn't need any shots today. The doctor has your records so she'll be able to tell us when we go back"
"I don't like shots" Rachel pouted, "do I have to get them?"
"You do" Shelby nodded, "do you know why you get them? Rachel shook her head." You know how you get sick sometimes and you don't feel very good for a little while and then you get better?" Rachel nodded, "well there are some diseases that can make you really, really sick, so sick you have to go to the hospital, or, if it's really bad, you could even die. When you get a shot, it's to help protect your body against those diseases, so you either don't get them in the first place, or to teach your body how to fight the disease so that if you do catch it, it doesn't make you as sick. So it might hurt a little when you get them but they stop you getting really sick in the future."
"Oh" Rachel nodded, nobody had ever explained that to her before, "do you get shots too?"
Shelby nodded, "when you're an adult you don't need many shots because the ones you get as a child last for a long time, but I get a flu shot every year to stop me getting sick so I can still look after you. You'll have to get one too as winter gets closer, but if I can, I'll make my appointment first so you can watch me get it and see that there's nothing to be scared of."
"Will you stay with me when I get it?" Rachel asked quietly.
"Of course. You can even sit on my knee or hold my hand if that's what you want, but you won't be getting it today so you don't need to worry about it just yet."
Once they were called back, Rachel was given a standard check up, the doctor noting that there was nothing to be worried about, and to Rachel's relief she was up to date on all her shots and she seemed healthy.
After finishing the routine exam the doctor asked Shelby if she had any concerns before looking to Rachel and asking her if she had anything she wanted to talk about.
Rachel shook her head but Shelby nodded, telling her, "Rachel mentioned to me that she doesn't like dairy products because they make her ill, I wondered if it would be possible to have her tested for an allergy so we'd know for sure if it's something serious or not."
The doctor turned her attention to Rachel and asked her several questions, each time Rachel looked at Shelby and every time Shelby reassured Rachel it was okay, she could be honest with the doctor. "I don't think she has an allergy" the doctor said as she made a few notes, "from what Rachel tells me, it sounds like she's probably lactose intolerant, I can recommend an allergy specialist who can confirm it and rule out anything else, with a few fairly simple tests."
"Thank you" Shelby nodded, "I'd appreciate that."
They didn't spend much longer with the doctor before Shelby thanked the woman for her time and she and Rachel left the room, a huge smile on Rachel's face because she'd been given both a sticker and a lollipop to show she'd been brave.
"You behaved really well in there" Shelby told Rachel as she helped her fasten her seat belt, "I know you were scared and worried but thank you sitting so nicely and for being honest with the doctor about the foods that make you feel sick."
Rachel looked up at Shelby, "I was good."
"You were very good" Shelby smiled, "and I'm very proud of you for behaving so well and being so brave." Rachel blushed slightly, more used to being scolded than praised, "and because you behaved so well, how about we go out for lunch as a treat?"
Rachel's head snapped up, "really?"
"Really" Shelby got into the car and turned to face Rachel, "so where would you like to go?"
Shelby managed to gently convince Rachel not to go to any of the fast food restaurants she wanted to go to, the girl not really knowing any other options, Shelby instead suggesting a burger place that she knew was really good.
Rachel couldn't believe it as she sat in the restaurant with Shelby, they had a window table so she could see all the people walking by. She'd been good. So good that Shelby had given her a treat. She couldn't ever remember that happening before. Usually she was just bad all the time and got punished. She hoped she'd be able to be good more often in future, it had made her tummy feel all warm when Shelby had said she was proud of her and that was something Rachel wanted to feel again.
The girl was halfway through her burger when she saw a server carry an ice cream sundae over to another table and her eyes lit up, it was the best thing she'd ever seen! Shelby couldn't help but smile at Rachel's reaction, and she decided there and then that she'd stop off at the store on the way home to pick up some dairy free ice cream to make a sundae for Rachel that wouldn't make her ill.
Rachel was slightly disappointed when she didn't get dessert but she did her best to hide it, she'd got to have a burger and soda and Shelby had shared fries with her, the fries had come in a bucket and there had been so many of them so she really couldn't complain! Rachel hadn't realised it but Shelby had barely eaten any of the fries, Rachel had been reluctant to order anything at all, it had taken a little encouragement for her to choose her hamburger, so, Shelby had asked if Rachel wanted to share some fries, knowing from the excited look on the girl's face that she really did, so she'd ordered the fries, just taking a few and letting Rachel eat the rest.
They sang along to the radio together on the drive home and Rachel didn't even notice they weren't heading straight home until Shelby told her, "I just need to grab a few things" as she pulled into the parking lot of a grocery store near their home, "I won't be too long."
Rachel walked through the store with Shelby, fingers curled around the side of the cart, only letting go when Shelby asked her to pick something off the shelves. Shelby knew the girl wasn't paying attention, Rachel seemingly lost in her thoughts, so Shelby was able to put two different flavours of dairy free ice cream into the cart along with several other sundae toppings without Rachel even noticing.
"Why don't you go upstairs and get changed while I put the groceries away?" Shelby suggested as she pulled onto their drive, "I'll call you when I've done and we can do a few pages in the workbook the school gave us."
"Okay" Rachel nodded, heading for the stairs without question, pausing on the bottom step and turning back to Shelby, "thank you for taking me out."
"You're very welcome" Shelby smiled, "thank you for your company." Rachel seemed to thrive on praise, and Shelby had quickly decided that rewarding her for 'good' behaviour, no matter how little, might work better than punishing 'bad' behavior. Of course Shelby would deal with any bad behaviour, but she wasn't going to draw attention to it, the girl would be punished and that would be the end of it, what she would draw attention to, and fuss over, was all the things Rachel did right, trying to convince the girl that she wasn't inherently 'bad'.
As Rachel headed upstairs with a smile on her face, Shelby set to work, she even had sundae glasses stashed away at the back of a kitchen cabinet, she'd bought them years ago and used them maybe twice, but now was their time to shine. She layered chocolate and vanilla dairy free ice cream with chocolate sauce and candy, finishing it off with a blob of dairy free cream, a wafer and even set a cherry on top. Shelby only hoped Rachel was as impressed with it as she was.
Leaving the rest of the groceries on the side, Shelby called Rachel down, unable to hold back her smile as Rachel saw what was waiting for her on the table.
Rachel was confused. Shelby hadn't even finished putting the groceries away. Maybe she wanted help, she had taken Rachel out for dinner after all, it was only fair that Rachel 'paid' her back by doing chores. But then her eyes were drawn to something. The tall glass of ice cream on the table caught her attention and her jaw dropped. Only moving her gaze when she heard Shelby tell her, "it's for you." She looked up in disbelief, only to see Shelby holding out a long spoon towards her, "go on" Shelby smiled, "eat it before it melts."
"It's for me?" Rachel asked as she reached out to take the spoon.
"It is" Shelby nodded, "I know you were disappointed that you didn't get one when we were out, but if what the doctor said today was true, the ice cream at the restaurant would make you sick, that's why I wanted to go to the store, so I could get you ice cream that won't make you feel ill. "
Rachel couldn't believe anyone would do this for her, "it won't make me sick?"
Shelby shook her head, "no, if the doctor is right things that are made with cows milk make you sick, this ice cream is made with milk from coconuts. Try it and see what you think."
Rachel sat at the table and tentatively took a bite of the ice cream. "It's really good!" she exclaimed.
"I'm glad to hear it" Shelby smiled, "you enjoy it" she said, watching Rachel for a minute before going back to putting the groceries away.
Silence fell over the kitchen, only broken by the clinking of Rachel's spoon against the glass, she was so happy! She'd been to the doctors and not had a shot, Shelby and the doctor had both believed her when she'd told them about her tummy aches, she'd been told she was good and Shelby was proud of her. She'd been out for lunch and now she was getting to eat ice cream that wouldn't make her sick. It was the best day ever!
When Rachel finished, she stood without being asked and put both her spoon and the glass in the dishwasher, walking over to Shelby and taking her by surprise when she wrapped her arms around her waist and hugged her tightly, "thank you."
Shelby smiled and ran her hand across Rachel's hair, "you are very welcome Rachel, and thank you for putting your things in the dishwasher without being asked, that was very helpful." Once again Rachel's face lit up at the praise, and she hugged Shelby tighter, briefly letting her head rest against the woman's chest. Shelby didn't pull back, this was the first time Rachel had initiated any sort of physical contact without asking permission first and Shelby was content to let Rachel hug her for as long as she needed to, "we're going to have to take you for a haircut" she said as she continued to stroke Rachel's hair, "your bangs are getting long."
"Can I cut it off?" Rachel asked, tilting her head to look at Shelby, "all of it?"
"You want to cut all of your hair off?" Shelby asked, getting a nod in response, Rachel's hair was midway down her back, Shelby wasn't sure when she'd last had it cut. "We can't cut it all off" Shelby got a defeated sigh in response, "I'd have to check it was okay with Sarah first, but we could cut quite a lot of it off though, maybe to here" she put her hand just above Rachel's shoulder, "that should make it easier for you to manage but it will still be long enough for you to tie back if you want to."
Rachel nodded, "will you ask her? I really want that!" Shelby might have said no to cutting all her hair off but Rachel was happy with the compromise, "I don't like these hairs" she pouted and pointed to her bangs, "they get in my eyes. Can I cut those ones off?"
Shelby shook her head, "if we cut your bangs off, they'll look silly, and, cut hair will just grow back. What we can do though is go to the mall at the weekend, we can pick out some nice clips and headbands that will hold them back from your face like this" she used her hand to swipe Rachel's bangs back, "it will take a while, but eventually your bangs will get as long as the rest of your hair and you'll be able to tie them back or just wear them down with the rest of your hair."
"Really? They'll grow and go away?"
"They'll grow and go away" Shelby nodded, "and we'll keep them out of the way as they grow so they don't annoy you."
Rachel nodded excitedly, "I'd like that, I'd really, really like that."
"Okay, Sarah said she'd call me later to see how your check up went so I'll talk to her about it then. But for now, let's wipe the chocolate sauce off your mouth and go through some of your workbook, let's try a little writing practice yeah? And then we can do some math later, we can practice adding again if you'd like."