Hope you enjoy this chapter!
Dumbledore tried to explain as much as he could to Lily when she went to see him, but left many vital pieces of information for Remus to explain. She went to him the next morning in the hospital wing, the possibilities of what had happened to Remus running through her mind.
He lay at the far end of the hospital wing, curtains semi-closed around him. His cheeks were white and his eyes were puffy and red as he sat up in bed, staring vacantly into the distance. James was sitting with him, holding his hand tightly. He also looked exhausted after the events of the previous night; it wasn't hard to guess that neither of them had had much sleep, but they still sat together, talking under their breaths to each other, looking totally closed off from the world around them. This initially intimidated Lily, and a voice in her head told her to turn back and just try and forget about the night - she didn't need to find out what had happened, however she kept putting one foot in front of the other until she was at the foot of his bed, wringing her hands nervously. James looked up at her and gave her a small smile and a nod before turning to Remus.
"Do you want me to go?"
"No, please stay." Remus said clutching his hand. Lily was going to be one of the first people he personally told outside of his friends, and he was terrified about how she would react. Would she never speak to him again? He really didn't want that. Over the years, he and Lily had become as close as people who weren't 'official' friends could be and he didn't want Hogwarts without her company.
Lily watched the interaction between the two boys and worried about the vulnerability Remus was displaying. He gestured to her to pull up a chair, and she sat down beside James as he pulled the curtains closed with his wand and cast a muffliato.
"Lily, I don't know how to say this-" Remus began.
"You're a werewolf, aren't you?"
Remus and James both stared at her.
"How, how did you figure?" James spluttered.
"Well, I have had some suspicions for a while. I noticed the pattern of Remus disappearing around full moon when we first started doing divination, because he was never in the full moon classes. I also noticed how tried he always looked in the days following. You would always nod off in the common room before dinner! So when we became prefects, I started subtly asking for the schedule to be changed whenever we had to patrol together around that time and I noticed the inexplicable relief you always conveyed. The connection between the full moon and lycanthropy came up quickly when I tried to find out more in the library. It wasn't too hard to figure; you just had to take notice." Lily shrugged, glancing down at her hands awkwardly.
Remus still looked a bit gobsmacked and James looked at her with a mixture of admiration and amusement.
"We have got to work on that, Moony!" James said, trying to lighten the mood.
Remus chuckled nervously.
"I hope no one else has noticed anything, Prongs."
"Nah don't worry mate, not everyone is as attentive as Evans here." He looked at her and smiled. Lily felt some warmth in her cheeks at the compliment and the goofy boy grinning at her, but quickly shrugged it off.
"Just so you know Remus, it doesn't bother me at all. There are plenty of people around here already judging people for things they can't help and I don't want to become one of them," she said softly, a heaviness to her voice, "this changes nothing between us. Except-" Remus paled, "I now get the nickname."
Remus snorted.
"Don't blame me for that one! That was all my friends' lack of creativity. You see, Prongs, this may be one of the ways we lack subtlety. Who decides to nickname their werewolf friend after the moon?"
James nodded his head grimly, a playful gleam in his eye.
"Well," James sighed, "We can't change it now. I am afraid that you are stuck with it forever, Moony."
The three settled into a peaceful and contented silence, and Remus gave James his hand back. They each had some of their own thinking to do. Remus felt a wave of relief and happiness as he wondered at how he ever got so lucky as to meet people like this. As a boy cursed with lycanthropy, he never imagined a future in which he would make friends for life that understood his disease and wouldn't care. He felt like he would never be alone again. Lily was filled with admiration at how much Remus had been through and never talked about and James, well James was marvelling at Lily, but that was nothing unusual.
"This doesn't explain the other nicknames though and why James felt that he could fight off a werewolf if it came to it." Lily said, breaking the silence and staring at the boys with a perplexed expression.
The two Marauders glanced at each other, looking a little panic-stricken. There was definitely too much that they could tell Lily and telling them about being Animagi was definitely that.
James stepped in before Remus tried to explain.
"Uh well, the other nicknames come from other stupid stories and lack of creativity," he said hesitantly, "and I thought I could fight a werewolf because, as you like to remind me Evans, of my sheer arrogance." He finished, hoping that Lily would just take the bait and have done with it.
Lily eyed him suspiciously, watching as his eyes darted around the room and his foot tapped the floor at a mile a minute. It was, quite frankly, obvious that they were hiding a lot more than they had just let on. However, Remus had just told Lily he was a werewolf so she felt that she couldn't force any more answers out of them. So, in an attempt to regain some sense of normality, Lily did what she was used to.
"A werewolf, Potter? You thought you could fight a werewolf? You stupid prat! You could have got yourself killed! And trust me, I only care because of the effect that would have on Remus! Merlin, I can't actually believe you sometimes." She stood up and snatched up her bag, "Remus, I'll see you later. And Potter, I hope I don't."
With that, she left the hospital wing, not daring to look back as she went.
Remus patted James' shoulder.
"I'm sorry mate, you didn't have to do that."
James shrugged, looking after Lily a tad mournfully.
"We couldn't let her find out any more. That would have endangered Sirius and Wormy too."
"She'll come back round though Prongs. I know how much more respect she must have for you now."
James laughed lightly. "I appreciate the sentiment, but I doubt it. Lily will never see me as anything but my first year self and I have to come to terms with that. It would be a blessing if we could even be friends."
Remus looked at his friend with pity. As someone who knew both James and Lily well, he knew how well they would fit together but, as someone who knew them well, he also knew how many of their clashing characteristics would obstruct any relationship they could have. They were like two fitting jigsaw pieces that kept being pushed together wrong. He hoped that one day something would finally push them together into the right place.
Downstairs, Sirius and Peter sat together in the Great Hall, eating their breakfast in silence. Peter didn't know how to behave around Sirius, as it was quite clear that he was a bit broken. Furthermore, he didn't want to do anything that would be seen a disloyal to either James or Remus, who had stayed the night in the hospital wing, forcing Peter to be with Sirius. Peter took in the disheveled appearance of his normally put together best friend. There were dark bags forming beneath his eyes and his hair hadn't been combed. He slumped over his breakfast, not bothering to hold himself properly.
Sirius picked at the eggs on his plate, pushing them around with his fork. He would do anything to take back the events of the past few days. He knew he had risked losing both Remus' and James' friendship, and he wasn't sure he could live without them. Peter hadn't been much comfort, barely talking to Sirius and always looking furtively away whenever Sirius caught him staring with a patronising pity in his eyes.
"Would you stop?" Sirius snapped, when he caught Peter doing it again.
"What?"
"Looking at me like I'm some sort of abandoned puppy!"
"Well sorry for trying to show some compassion, Sirius. But it is your fault that you're in this situation and, seeing as I'm your only friend right now, you could be a bit nicer to me."
Sirius rolled his eyes. "I know you love that you're not the odd one out in the Marauders anymore, Peter but there's no need to rub it in my face."
Peter sat still for a moment and then got up, walking casually away from Sirius out of the Great Hall, not bothering to check Sirius' reaction. Sirius knew he wouldn't return. He then copied Peter, strolling out of the Great Hall nonchalantly, trying to look like nothing was bothering him at all.
In an empty corridor on the third floor, he bumped into someone who had been determinedly walking in the other direction. He looked down to see Lily Evans, vigorously apologising.
"I'm so sorry- oh Sirius"
He readied himself for some more judgement. To be fair, he had nearly killed her once best friend so he couldn't really blame her if she had something to say to him. Maybe it would make him feel better if everyone just told him what they thought? It would be better than watching Peter walk around on eggshells at any rate.
"Are you alright?" She spoke tenderly.
That was not what Sirius had been preparing for and, at this show of caring and affection, Sirius broke. A tear began to trickle down his cheek and Lily quickly enveloped him in her arms. He rested his head on her shoulder as his body shook with sobs. She was exactly what he imagined having a mother would feel like. She smelt sweet and floral, a very comforting scent, and stroked his hair gently, lulling him into a sense of security.
"What if they never talk to me again, Lily?" He murmured into her shoulder.
She didn't respond to this, not deeming it worthy of an answer.
"I can't lose them, I can't. They're all the family I've got."
She took hold of his shoulders firmly, gazing steadily up into his watery blue eyes.
"Sirius Black. I don't believe that you could ever lose James Potter or Remus Lupin. You and James are more like brothers than best mates and Remus Lupin is one of the kindest and most forgiving people I have ever met. You will be able to fix this Sirius, I promise you."
He nodded.
"I'm not sure I deserve them."
She sighed, "You may not deserve them, that may be true, but they certainly deserve you." Lily then pulled him back into a hug, smoothly running a comforting hand up and down his back.
They stood there in the empty corridor like that, while Sirius cried as much as he could manage. After the tears started refusing to come out anymore, Lily took him back to his now empty dormitory and helped him clean himself up, making sure his hair was brushed to its usual standard and helping him pick out some fresh clean robes. She then walked him back down to breakfast, and made sure that he had had enough to eat. They sat there companionably, Lily trying to make conversation about something other than the Marauders with Sirius. It was hard. She got a reprieve when Marlene came in and sat for breakfast next to Lily, staring quizzically at Sirius. Lily shook her head as a signal for her not to ask.
"Morning Lil and Sirius," Marlene said casually and helped herself to toast with a large dollop of baked beans.
"You look nice." Lily smirked, "any reason?"
Marlene was indeed looking particularly nice. Her blonde hair was swept into an elegant ponytail and there were glimmers of gold around her eyes.
"None." Marlene retorted bluntly.
"Nothing to do with a certain Gryffindor?"
"No!" Marlene hissed.
Sirius glanced at the two girls bemusedly. "Which Gryffindor?"
Marlene rolled her eyes at him. "There is no Gryffindor!"
"Oh please Marlene," Lily teased, "I'm fairly certain there is a Gryffindor somewhere in this castle and one of them is your particular favourite."
"It's not one of the Marauders is it?" Sirius said skeptically. "I'm not really sure I could deal with you and any of them, Marlene."
Marlene blanched. "Ew no! You lot are much too in love with yourselves and each other and none of you are even slightly attractive to me anyway."
Lily laughed at her friend's disgusted reaction, "Now that's a bit harsh,"
Marlene quickly grabbed this opportunity to turn the tables on Lily.
"Hm, you got your eye on one of the Marauders?" She jabbed and was pleased to see a reaction from Lily as she watched a blush rise on Lily's cheeks.
"No!"
Sirius looked gasped and put a hand on his heart, like Lily had made some sort of personal affront. "That was a bit quick, Evans."
"Merlin," Lily said, putting her head in her hands, "I can't please either of you!"
Marlene laughed and tucked into her breakfast and Lily started to read her book that she had pulled out of her bag. Sirius realised that there was an easy routine that the girls had settled into, and that it would be hard for him to suddenly fit in. It made his heart pang with longing for the Marauders.
Severus Snape watched them from the Slytherin tables, resentment filling his already cold heart. Sirius Black was sitting with Lily Evans: the Sirius Black who had just attempted to have him murdered and the love of his life Lily Evans. It all seemed so wrong.
"Snape," Avery said loudly, drawing Snape's attention away from the sounds of Lily's laughter, "Did you find anything out last night like you said you would?"
Snape sighed inwardly. Yes, he had found out all he had wanted to know and more, but Dumbledore had also sworn him to secrecy. Snape did not like Dumbledore, but he did have great respect for the wizard; he believed him to be the one of the greatest wizards to have ever lived.
"No, Black was just bluffing." Snape muttered, cringing at the embarrassment of having to say he was wrong.
Avery looked disappointed. "I should have predicted that that wasn't going anywhere. Well Snape, you'll have to find some other way to prove yourself actually useful to the Dark Lord, rather than just some worthless half-blood."
Snape felt his heart rate speed up at the insult. What he would do to prove Avery wrong and show him the magic that Snape had managed to harness. But, cursing one of the sons of one of Lord Voldemort's most loyal followers would never get him anywhere. This was just another moment where Snape would just have to bide his time. Soon he could show them all: Avery, Mulciber, Lily, Black, Potter, Lupin, all of them, just how powerful he would become and they would all rue the day that they ever decided to cross Severus Snape, well except Lily. He would forgive her for having out with the scum and they would be together. For now, he would just have to deal with Avery and watch Lily from afar.
Back at the Gryffindor table, a conversation had started about the upcoming Hogsmeade weekend, and how maybe that was a factor in Marlene's appearance.
"Are you going with anyone, Lily?" Sirius asked, genuinely interested. He knew that for the first few years of them being able to go to Hogsmeade, James had always asked Lily, but he had quit that once he reached the grand age of 15, when he realised how immature and annoying that was. Lily had gone with other boys before, ignoring James' frustration, but that had never turned into anything.
"No, I have no plans for it, if Marlene works up the nerve to ask Adam."
"Ohh Adam is it?" Sirius said winking suggestively at Marlene.
"Was it that hard for you to keep that from Sirius, Lily? He's probably one of the people I would have been least likely to tell!
Lily apologised and then added, "You know how hard it is for me sometime to keep secrets!" she thought back to the big secret she had found out earlier that day, and realised that she probably wasn't as bad at keeping secrets as she thought she was.
"Oh never-mind that," Sirius said dismissively and waved his hand, moving back onto the topic of his initial question, "Do you want to go with me, Evans? As friends."
She smiled, "That would be nice."
Marlene sniggered. "What is Potter going to think when he finds out you accept his best friend the very first time he asks?" She didn't notice Sirius pale slightly at the question. Lily noticed, and quickly tried to brush it off.
"He's not going to think anything of me going with Sirius for many reasons. One, he's over me. Two, Sirius is gay and three, it's none of his business!"
"Really Lily?" Marlene laughed, "Is this a really easy game of two truths one lie?"
Sirius laughed as the tension broke and Lily was relieved. She wasn't sure how long Sirius would feel OK but she wanted to keep it this way for as long as possible. Unfortunately, that could never be the case. She watched Sirius' face fall as the three other Marauders came down for breakfast.
James and Peter were flanking Remus, who was looking a lot better than when Lily had seen him earlier. As they passed, Sirius rose to try and apologise to them, but James flat out ignored him. Sirius sat back down defeatedly and looked at Lily, who tried to give him her most reassuring smile.
Down the table, James was furious.
"Not only does he get Moony to nearly kill Snape but then has the audacity to try and get pity from Evans and Marlene?"
Remus tried to soothe him. "Prongs, it's fine. I need some time without Sirius but I don't care who he hangs out with in the meantime."
"I do!" James exclaimed. "I was so close to being on Evans' good side this morning and that was all ruined when I had to protect a secret for mine, Wormtail's and Sirius' sake!"
Peter nodded along vehemently, glaring at Sirius further up the table. Remus looked at him exasperatedly.
"Prongs, Lily knows the majority of what happened and she is free to make decisions for herself. We have to just accept her judgement."
James sighed loudly. "Sure." and then muttered under his breath, "backstabbing dog."
Remus wondered when the Marauders would ever all be friends again. It certainly looked like James and Peter were't too keen on it, though he was fairly certain that James would quickly change his mind. He wasn't one to hold grudges and Peter would just follow his lead. For now, they would all have to get used to this weird new arrangement.