Chapter 4: The first night
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'What I've done?!' That was all I could think of. I saw her there, lying on the bed, dreaming of other worlds, with her guard down and with her mouth surprisingly closed, and, like a jug of cold water, reality suddenly slapped me. At what point did it seem like a good idea to bring a stranger into the house? And for weeks! Had I gone crazy? Was I feeling so lonely? I wasn't cut out to be with people, It's exhausting!
What I liked the most about my job was that with cordial and minimal socialization I could obtain excellent results; the teachers didn't talk to me other than the typical greetings and small talk unless they needed something specific and, the youngster, not even that. They've ever tried to go from good vibes with me but, despite not being rude with them, I don't think work is a place to go with distractions.
Sometimes I missed my family. I saw them once every several years as it was an expensive trip and I couldn't afford to pay for it as often as I'd like. But still, Sven's company was the closest thing to family I'd ever felt. The camaraderie and understanding that existed between us seemed like something out of a fictional movie. And, thanks to him, the human presence in my life had become quite expendable and even, at times, a bit annoying. People talk a lot, gossip a lot, offended and get offended a lot, and it's just easier to live without them.
However, on second thought, it had been a while since I had met Anna; we had argued, joked, had intense talks, and even the Snow Queen had threatened me, and yet I didn't feel tired or jaded. I was somehow intimidated by the situation, but at the same time, I was curious to see what day-to-day was like with this enthusiastic, disorderly, and scandalous girl.
That night, for the first time in four years, I realized how uncomfortable that couch was. I couldn't let her sleep there, but I also didn't know how long I was going to hold out under those conditions. 'Maybe I should improvise a kind of sleeping bag with some blankets and try my luck on the floor'; but that would be another night: I didn't want to wake her up, and anyway, I didn't think I was going to get much sleep in that state.
Anna, on the other hand, was sleeping soundly and peacefully. To be honest, I didn't think she was the one who was going to snore the two of us. I didn't know if I snored or not, but my prominent and slightly crooked nose gave me some clue. In the end, after so much distrust, she had no qualms about falling asleep before me. Either I had inspired her a lot of confidence, or she trusted anyone very quickly, or she was so sleepy that she preferred to risk dying.
A period of time later, who knows if minutes or hours, as tradition dictates, not sleeping at night means a terrible urge to evacuate, so I had no choice but to sneak past her to go to the bathroom. And, as tradition dictates as well, when you don't want to make noise, that's when you get clumsier, so I tripped over her shoes and landed on the wall with my hand, freeing my head from a good bump. My blood ran cold. 'Now she'll wake up, see me by her side, and think I'm trying something and I'll be the prey of her sister.' My mind was racing. The noise wasn't huge, but it was enough to wake anyone up; anyone but Anna. When she said she didn't mind the noise to sleep, she meant it. She stirred slightly in the place, sighed deeply, and continued to sleep as if nothing had happened. She was definitely too trusting.
The fright didn't make the urge to go to the bathroom dissolve before I reached the toilet by miracle, so after making sure she was still sleeping, I finally went to the bathroom and regained my composure. Then I returned to the couch this time with successful stealth, lay down as best I could, closed my eyes, and tried to sleep. But that night closing my eyes meant seeing her eyes very clearly, her freckles, the lock of hair that she placed every now and then behind her very fine ear, and her tender smile.
It was going to be a very long night.