Alex woke up 10 minutes later just before Teddy started doing the lumbar puncture. He tried to turn over and lay down on his back but Meredith stopped him before he could.

"Alex, can you hear me?"

"Hmmm..." He sighed.

"You are about to have a spinal tap so you can't move, do you feel sick?"

Alex shook his head and opened his eyes widely, he squeezed Meredith's hand as tightly as he could and looked up at her with tears in her eyes.

"It's okay, your going to be okay."

"Alex, it's going to hurt a lot but try not to move so I can do it fast, Meredith isn't going to leave you. I'm going to start now."

The pressure was immense and Alex winced in pain, he squeezed Meredith's hand tightly as tears rolled down his face. Meredith tried to help him but she couldn't. Alex couldn't remember how many times he had told patients that it doesn't hurt that much and that it only hurts for a few minutes. He was so wrong! His entire body already hurt but now it was so much worse.

"Mer." He managed to whisper through his sobs.

"I know Alex, it's nearly finished."

Teddy took the needle out of his spine and placed it onto the tray beside him. An intern ran out with it and Meredith helped him lay on his back.

"You need to stay on your back for a few hours now and if you get a worse headache you need to page me. How are you feeling at the moment?"

"Sick." He whispered.

"Are you going to be sick?"

He nodded his head and Teddy sat the bed up as Meredith grabbed the bucket from the side of his bed. She knew that she couldn't rub his back because it would be so sore so she held his shaking hand. At least because of the fluids he wasn't dry heaving anymore. Once he had finished Meredith helped him sit back against the cushions and Teddy went to get a new bucket. Meredith wiped his mouth with a tissue and placed the blanket over him now his temperature had gone back down.

He was drained, you could see it on his pale face. His eyes were glazed over and droopy, his face was a sickly shade of white, his eyes had huge black bags under them and his voice was flat. Alex was clearly depressed and that was bad enough on its own let alone if he had something like meningitis.

"You need to sleep Alex."

"No...pain." He stuttered.

"Can he have any more pain meds?"

"He is maxed out on morphine and ibuprofen, in 2 hours he can but nothing for the time being." Altman said exiting the room.

"Do you need anything?" Meredith asked.

"Juice." He whispered.

"I'll go get some." Robbins said walking out of the room.

"Are you feeling any better?"

"No..."

"How can I help?"

"Mom, someone...needs to...tell...I can't...breathe." Alex gasped.

"Someone page Teddy!" Meredith screamed.

Cristina rushed over and turned up his oxygen and changed the cannula oxygen to a mask. Teddy came running into the room,

"What happened?"

"He can't breathe."

"I have turned up his oxygen." Cristina said.

"We need to sedate him, let his body try to recover."

Teddy grabbed 20mg of oxazepam and injected it straight into his cannula on his arm. Alex slowly fell unconscious and Teddy adjusted the mask around his face. Meredith ran out of the room crying,

"I'll go." Derek said moving away from Alex.

"No let me." Cristina said.

Cristina found Meredith in the conference room with Richard sat next to her. She was sobbing and Richard was trying to comfort her but it wasn't really working or helping.

"Meredith." She sighed.

Cristina sat down next to her and Meredith leaned into her,

"Why...why did this happen?" She said through her sobs.

"Meredith it couldn't have been helped, he is recovering, he needs to recover."

Meredith wiped her eyes and sat up again.

"You need to rest Meredith, what medication did he have?" Richard asked.

"Oxazepam." Cristina replied.

"He should be out for at least 9 hours then, you go to an on-call room and sleep, I'm going to get Derek." Richard said.

Cristina, Richard and Meredith stood up and walked out of the room.

"Which on-call room?" Richard asked.

"6." Meredith sighed.

"Okay, I'll go find Derek."

Richard walked away and Cristina and Meredith went straight to the on-call room around the corner. Meredith walked in and laid straight down on the bed and fell asleep instantly.

"Meredith, Mer." Derek shouted.

Meredith woke up abruptly and sat up.

"What's wrong?" She asked rubbing her eyes.

"Alex is awake, he has got worse he is asking for you."

Meredith shot up and ran out of the room with Derek following shortly behind her. She ran straight up the 3 flights of stairs into the ward towards his room, when she arrived he was hunched over a bucket with Cristina rubbing his back looking shocked and grossed out. Owen, Richard and Bailey were all stood in different corners of the room watching in silence. Meredith went straight over to rub his back for him. He immediately leant back onto her clavicle sighing with relief at his best friend coming back.

"Your okay Alex."

Meredith laid him back down onto his back and held his hand tightly. Meredith held his hand until he fell back asleep from the drugs still in his system.

"The spinal tap results came back, they're clear, he doesn't have meningitis luckily so we are back to square one." Richard said

"Do you know his history?"

"What sort?" Owen asked

"Mental."

"No Meredith." Owen sighed.

"His father beat him and his mother black and blue, his father was also a druggie and an alcoholic. When he was old enough to hurt him back he left them all. His mother has schizophrenia so he had to look after her his entire teenage years. He had to wash her, feed her, cook for her, do her laundry and force feed her pills. Not only that but he had to that to his brother and sister too. Alex couldn't handle it and got her committed so that meant he and his siblings had to go into foster care which was worse that being with his parents. Then 5 days ago his brother and sister passed away. He hasn't told many people this but he told me that if needs be I could tell people. Alex has been diagnosed with PTSD, generalised anxiety disorder and dysthymia. He is severely depressed at the moment, I have seen him like this before like after Izzie left but not this bad."

"Oh my god." Bailey said.

"Is he on any meds?" Owen asked sounding concerned.

"No he refuses them, he really does need them though. He pushes through everything every day but he has cracked. I think this might be how he feels every single day but he acts like he is strong."

"Nobody would've known, I'm going to start him on anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds to see if that might improve his condition."

Alex woke up again and tried to move onto his side but he couldn't as he was so weak. Meredith wanted to help him but she knew she couldn't. He fell back asleep when he got comfortable. Owen went over and injected medication into his cannula and went to write it down on his chart.

"We have to go Meredith, we have a surgery we'll come up later." Bailey said before leaving with Richard.

Owen sat on the couch with Cristina and Derek. Meredith sat down next to Alex looking at the wall nervously,

"We can help him Meredith."

"What you are doing for him is more than most people could do, I couldn't." Cristina said.

Alex suddenly woke up and threw up all over the bed and himself,

"Alex!" Meredith shouted standing straight up.

"Sorry." He whispered.

"Do you want to take him into the washroom and I'll sort out the bed?" Derek asked walking over to the bed.

"Yes, Owen?"

"Okay."

Meredith helped the woozy Alex upright and waited for Owen to come and help him. They stood him up and Cristina and Derek started to strip the bedsheets. As soon as they walk in to the bathroom Alex collapses to the floor with a bang.

"Alex, stay awake, stay with us." Owen pleaded.

Alex was practically gagging by this point, Meredith and Owen managed to sit him up just in time for him to expel his stomach into the toilet bowl. He was barely conscious so Owen and Meredith were holding him up and rubbing his back whilst shooting worried looks at each other. Once Alex had finished he collapsed back into their arms and fell straight unconscious.

"Alex, wake up, ALEX!" Meredith shouted.

Derek and Cristina came running into the bathroom, Meredith was trying her hardest to wake him up but he wasn't. Owen placed him in the rescue position and they waited for him to wake up.

Meredith was panicking like mad because after 10 minutes he hadn't regained consciousness yet.

"Why isn't he awake?" Meredith said stroking his hair.

"Cristina, can you get Richard, Bailey and Teddy?" Owen whispered trying not to alarm Meredith anymore.

Yang ran out of the room and Derek sat where she was sat previously. 5 minutes later, Alex was still unconscious and Richard, Bailey and Teddy ran in the room.

"What's happened?" Teddy asked crouching down next to his limp body.

"He has been unconscious for nearly 15 minutes now and he is showing no sign of waking up." Derek said.

"Okay, can someone go get him some oxygen?"

"I will." Meredith said needing to leave the stuffy room.

"This isn't good, what can we do now?" Owen asked.

"I don't know but whatever we do we need to do fast." Teddy said.

Meredith ran back in with an oxygen tank and mask and placed them on the floor. Owen placed mask on his face and Richard turned the nosel. After 3 more agonising silent minutes Alex fluttered open his glazed eyes and everyone took a sigh of relief. He tried to move but he couldn't so he just closed his eyes once again.

"Alex can you hear me?" Bailey asked breaking the silence.

He opened his eyes and looked at her with tears in his eyes, Alex was terrified, anxious, grieving and depressed all at the same time. His entire body was on fire, he was sweating like mad, his head was killing him which made him super dizzy and to top it off he was really nauseous.

"We are going to get you back in bed and run some more tests on you. We can up your pain meds as well." Hunt said.

Meredith, who was holding his hand, helped him sit up and Derek and Owen all helped him stand up. All his limbs felt numb and nonexistent so he was barely walking. It was hardly 4 metres away the bed but it took 5 minutes to get there, as soon as his body flopped down on the bed he sunk down and laid in the foetal position. Meredith strategically placed some pillows on his back, stomach and under his head and neck to try make it more comfortable for the pained man. Alex fell back to sleep as he was so exhausted. He looked so deathly and so pale.

"Cristina, run a CBC, blood count, blood gas, another lumbar puncture and a head CT." Teddy asked.

Cristina instantly went over to Alex and started to do a blood draw. Alex didn't even wake up once when she was doing it. Meredith was stood talking to Richard and Bailey and Teddy was doing some exams on him. Once she has finished she rushed the bloods down to the labs and ran all the way back.

"I placed a rush order on them Dr Altman." She said.

"Okay, do you want me to do the lumbar puncture?"

"It's okay I'll do it Dr."

"Okay I have to go check on my post-ops when you have the results page me straight away."

Teddy left the room as Meredith and Bailey walked in.

"Can you wake him up Mer?"

"Why?"

"I have to do another lumbar puncture on him."

"Oh okay."

Meredith walked over to him as he shivered ever so slightly and he was plastered in sweat. His hair was stuck against his forehead and his cheeks were bright red.

"Alex? Alex?" She whispered.

Alex opened his eyes partially before shutting them again from the bright light. The light just made his nausea even more.

"Sick..." He sighed barely audible.

Meredith quickly got the bucket and placed it next to him. Using all of his strength he lifted his body off the bed slightly and threw up in the bucket very violently. Meredith rubbed his back and sighed. Once he had finished Bailey went to get a new bucket and Meredith laid him back down.

"Alex they have to do another spinal tap now, so try to stay awake and stay very still."

Cristina lifted up the back of his shirt and smeared numbing cream all over it. Once she had finished doing that, she started the procedure. As soon as the needle inserted into his spine Alex called out in agonising pain and squeezed Meredith's hand and his eyes shut. This was hell. The pain just became worse and worse the longer the needle was in, the numbing cream hadn't done its job whatsoever. Alex had tears running down his face and Meredith was trying to help him but he couldn't. The bright white hot pain flooded his eyesight until he couldn't see.

"Meredith!" He pleaded quietly.

"I know Alex, she's just got to take the needle out now."

Even Bailey looked worried by the sight of her former intern, he was the strong tough one not the weak, crying throwing up one. She knew something seriously wrong had to be going on. As soon as Cristina took the needle out Alex once again called out in pain, Cristina quickly placed a large bandage on his back and ran to the lab to get the order placed. Meredith sat Alex back against the bed and placed the cushions around him. He fanned his fingers out on his mouth and tried to sit up but he couldn't so Bailey quickly ran over and helped him sit as Meredith placed the bucket on his lap. He couldn't stop throwing up for 10 minutes straight.

"Your okay Alex, your okay." Bailey kept reassuring.

Once he finally lifted his head up again the room was spinning. Derek went into doctor mode when he his eyes not focusing and his head moving continuously. He shot up and started flashing a light in his eyes. The sudden light made his throw up again but after that he felt empty. Derek suddenly placed the thermometer in his ear and waited for the beep.

"104.6." He announced.

"I'm going to get some wet cloths and ibuprofen." Bailey said.

"Take the covers off him." Derek said.

Meredith quickly obeyed and threw the wet covers on the chair beside the bed.

"I'm tired." He whispered delusional through his fever.

"No sleeping Alex, you can't go to sleep yet!" Derek shouted.

Teddy came back just expecting to check on him but instead this scene was unfolding. At the same time Bailey ran back in with a handful of ice cold compresses and barged straight past Teddy. She started to place them on his forehead and neck.

"What's his temp at?" Teddy asked charging towards the bed.

"104.6." Meredith replied.

"Start him on 400mg of ibuprofen and 20mg of morphine."

A nurse that had run in had started doing that and then Alex started to seize!

"He's seizing!" Meredith shouted.

"Bagging him!" Bailey shouted.

Derek, a nurse, Altman and Meredith were all holding onto him,

"Push 2 of lorazepam." Derek shouted.

Cristina ran in and quickly did that. He wasn't stopping just getting worse,

"That's 1 minute, push 3 more." Meredith shouted.

After the next lot of lorazepam he started to come out of the seizure and he was laying limply on the bed. Bailey replaced the bag with the mask so he could breathe properly.

"As soon as he comes to and his temp has come down order a head CT." Derek instructed.

The nurse left the room and Derek checked his temp again.

"103.9."

"At least it's going down." Meredith said.

"I know but why did he have a seizure? Something isn't adding up correctly." Derek continued.

Alex came to 5 minutes later with the worst headache he'd ever had. Everything was on fire and he felt so damn hot.

"Alex, can you hear me?" Meredith said.

"Alex?" Teddy asked.

"Hmmm..."

"You have had a seizure and we are going to take you up for a head CT." Derek said quietly.

Alex tried to sit up but he couldn't, Meredith helped me sit up and Alex smiled at her half-heartedly.

"I've got you."

Cristina went and got a wheelchair and wheeled it around to Meredith and Alex. She helped Meredith get Alex onto the wheelchair and then with Derek, Bailey and Teddy they all left the room. Due to all the medication he was on they had to take his drip with him and an oxygen tank and cannula so he could breathe.

"What happened?" Alex asked quietly.

"Your temp went up to 104.6 and then you had a seizure. We are going to get you a head CT now to make sure that there is nothing wrong there. Alex, I had to tell everyone about what you told me about your diagnoses."

"Oh." He sighed looking down at his lap.

They all piled into the empty elevator and pressed the button for the third floor.