The Grinning Ninja

by Our hero

Naruto has eaten the Bara-Bara No Mi and become a spliting human arming himself with fuinjutsu tricks traps and about a million knives, he’s going to kick the chunin exams flashy face as the Star Clow-Nin,

4. The search for Tsundere

The search for Tsunade

—

Fan corner

Big Inferno: do you know the best thing about the way I write stories?, that even I don't know what's going to happen, Ino is a main character in this story whether she ends up with Naruto is anyone's guess, honestly in my head when I was first writing this it ended in fifteen chapters, with Naruto tragically dying to save Konohamaru and him deciding if he would take Naruto's devil fruit for himself,

I don't think it's going to end that way now.

And funnily enough last chapter I was going to ask if you all would vote on what I'd write next the Tsunade arc or the land of spring movie

Which might take a while since I haven't actually seen the land of spring movie,

But nobody ever votes when I try to get them to,

And I was sick of writing the last chapter soooooo moving on,

As for the answer to the question though yes, I probably will write all the movies into this, because honestly writing is one of the few things in my life I enjoy doing,

Warning the author does not believe in warnings, (If you remember this, it'll make sense later,)

Let's begin

"Good evening Uzumaki," Sakura greeted her blonde teammate as he entered his apartment,

Naruto turned his head, sitting at his table was Sakura, Ino, Shikamaru, Hinata, And The three sand siblings,

"Uh Good evening?," he said confused at the people seemingly waiting inside his home, he walked over to his sofa and set Yakumo down on it, "you want me to get you anything?" He asked She shook her head, he placed the bowl of ramen in front of her along with a pair of chopsticks his hand floated off to get,

He turned back to his guests and asked "so what brings you all here to my humble home tonight?," he asked trying to break the awkward silence,

Sakura just glared at him, Shikamaru scratched the back of his neck and looked to Ino who herself looked flustered, the sand siblings shared awkward looks at each other, so it fell to Hinata to break the silence,

"Um w-well, I was w-waiting for you to get back t-to ask I-if it was okay if I s-s-," she swallowed something and then said "if I could stay here for a while longer,"

Naruto waved her off "course you can," then he realised she was wearing her own clothes "oh hey you've got your clothes back, sorry I wasn't there for that, but I guess you wouldn't really want a guy going through your clothes,"

Hinata nodded "um yes, miss t-Teresa took me home to get my things,"

"That's good, now you won't have to wear my old clothes," Naruto said

Hinata nodded smiling,

Temari stood up "we need your help,"

"Huh?," Naruto asked, "hey uh why are you guys still here anyway?,"

"after our village attacked yours it was agreed by both of our villages that we should remain here for a few days as a symbol of peace," Kankuro said

Temari picked up where her brother trailed off, "as for why we're here It has to do with you helping us with the uh, you know, and since you've helped us be a family again and don't get me wrong I'm-,we're extremely grateful, but-"

"Extremely incredibly grateful," Kankuro agreed, "like there isn't any words for exactly how grateful we are,"

"yes, and we're here because-," then Temari blushed a mixture of frustration and embarrassment "I know but how- how do I explain why we're here?,"

Kankuro opened his mouth, before slowly closing it and rubbing the back of his head,

"Naruto," Garaa said standing up, "perhaps if I show you, then you'll understand," the redhead said taking the blonde's hand and led him out of the room into his bedroom,

as soon as they were alone Naruto felt a change in the air, but no further moves were made, the two Jinjuriki just stood there holding hands, a few minuets passed before Gaara let go of Naruto's hand and moved away from him, "My father was not a kind man, not even to his children, Temari gained his admiration by becoming not only strong but smart, and as she rose in his eyes his favourite before that fell immensely, Neither of my siblings had life easy, and mine was no exception,"

slowly Garaa began untying his sash and let his gourd slide to the ground, then his hands moved down to the bottom of his top and slowly he dragged the fabric over his head,

Naruto's eyes went wide, at first Gaara's breasts had his attention, But then a slight breeze opened Naruto's curtains gently letting moonlight frame Gaara's pale soft skin, her small yet perky breasts, her rough yet feminine figure, her lips that quivered anxiously, her soft teal eyes that wouldn't meet his gaze, her messy red hair that made his hand wonder just how soft it was, "gorgeous." the words slipped from his lips before he could stop them, he blushed, he looked up in time to meet Gaara's eyes, both turned away from each other, though they couldn't look at each other for a few seconds the silence felt like it lasted hours, soon Gaara pulled her top back on and tied her sash, and though they both refused to look at each other, they left back to the kitchen,

Temari patted her sister on the shoulder, "so?," Kankuro asked,

Naruto sat on the floor, "I'm not sure I completely understand what you're asking," he said slowly

Garaa smiled slightly "to make things simple, I need you to marry me," the whole room shot the two shocked looks,

'when I fixed Garaa's seal I wasn't exactly looking at his er her chest, but I can't believe I missed them,' he thought coughing into his hand, then he realised just what they asked of him "what?, marry you why?!," he cried

Kankuro pounded the table "because if what Garaa showed you comes to light, then we'll need something to stop people from asking for a marriage contract," then he realised what Naruto said, "and what's with that attitude!, my sis- I mean my sibling is a catch and any-one would be lucky to have her!,"

Temari slapped her face, "Smooth,"

"Uh well, let's just say I just got out of my first relationship, it didn't end well." He thought it over

"And I'm sorry about that," Kankuro said awkwardly "but-,"

"Perhaps we should leave and let him think over our request," Garaa suggested, her siblings nodded at her and thanked him as they left,

Naruto smiled standing back up "so that's them, what about you three?," he asked looking at Ino,

Sakura gritted her teeth, "I just want you to know," she said standing up, "that I'm going to kill you," she ran over to the blonde fist raised and swung it at him,

Now Sakura was angry at her blonde teammate and hadn't considered that the gap in power between them now closely resembled something of a small chasm, no she expected to hit him like she used to and thus was completely unsurprised when her fist actually hit his cheek and he fell to the floor,

Naruto raised his hands "okay I'm sorry for whatever I did,"

Sakura was about to smirk before realising just how much her fist hurt, she winced in pain before saying "good, now apologise for what you did to Ino," she said,

"For what?, oh you mean this morning right?," He asked

"No," Sakura said, before sighing, "first Hinata's living with you, second you bring another girl home, and on that note who is she?,"

Sarah grinned "Heya gorgeous I'm Sarah, and this young lady is Ya-Ku-Mo, formerly of the Kurama clan but we've been exiled due to circumstances that some we did and some drove us to do what we did, but we're now homeless, but because Naruto graciously put us under his big hard throbbing protection we now share his home and hopefully his bed,"

Naruto sweat dropped "technically you will be sharing my bed," he said making Sakura glare at him, Ino glare at the girl, Hinata blush, and Shikamaru stare longingly at the door,

"Yes!," Sarah cheered,

"With Hinata," he clarified making everyone except Shikamaru and Hinata nod,

Sarah scratched her head, "which ones that?,"

Naruto pointed at her and Sarah gave her a once over, then she nodded "yes I approve of my new bed warme-" Yakumo slapped a hand over Sarah's mouth and said "we won't do anything inappropriate,"

Sakura stomped drawing attention back to her, "so its time to apologise to Ino,"

Naruto scratched the back of his head, "yeah, but on that note what did I do again?,"

Sakura's scowl deepened, she grabbed Naruto by the collar and pulled him closer to her "for hurting her you jackass,"

"How've I hurt her?," he asked getting a little defensive now

"By going behind her back and bringing these girls into your home,"

"How's that hurting anyone?, what I do inside my house is my business," Naruto retorted,

Shikamaru rolled his eyes 'just as I expected, Naruto doesn't know that Ino's fallen for him, nor does he realise what his situation looks like to others, also his lacklustre relationship with Sakura and her strained relationship with Ino is basically kicking this conflict into full swing,' he turned to tell Ino what he'd deduced, but she was ahead of him.

Ino stood up hitting the table with both hands "Both of you please stop," she said, Naruto and Sakura turned to her, "What's wrong with you two?, it's like you can't stand to be in the same room with each other, you're both acting like children," she looked at them both Naruto looked ashamed and Sakura refused to meet her eyes, then Ino stormed over to them "and the worst thing is both of you are ignoring the problem, Naruto you have a big heart and I understand that you can't abandon anyone who needs help, but by accepting someone who's been removed from their own clan into your home while you yourself are a clan head you've essentially agreed to act in Loco Parentis of her," Ino informed him

"Loco Parentis?, and what do mean clan head?," The older but certainly not wiser blonde asked,

Ino sighed, "after your true parentage was revealed you became Uzumaki clan head, and as a clan head your actions have large consequences, and in Loco Parentis just means you are now Yakumo's legal guardian,"

Naruto's eyes widened "Wait so she's like my child?,"

"Yes," Ino said, "and while we're on the subject of being a legal guardian you are required by law to file certain paperwork to the Hokage stating that Yakumo now lives with you, that she was kicked out of her own clan, and considering you're a fresh Chunin and worse that you've likely never read about clan law, you'll likely need to name someone else to fill in for you, especially since you are a likely target for the Clan Restoration Act, being the last known Uzumaki, and the only known relative of the fourth,"

Naruto scratched his head "Uh, yeah got it,"

Ino groaned, "Um excuse me," Yakumo asked her eyes bright and filled with wonder "But are you like my mommy now?,"

Ino blushed, but she somehow managed to control herself, "Ahem, if Naruto does pick me to act as your legal guardian in his absence then, I suppose that It would be similar to a parent," Ino said desperately trying not to picture the three of them acting as a family,

Yakumo noticed what Ino was doing, but her gratitude to her for breaking up the fight had her not wanting to upset the girl, but Sarah had no such restraint, "but momma didn't you tell pops that those acting in loco parentis were basically parents?," the puppet asked as ''innocently'' as one could,

"NO!," Hinata shouted making everyone look at her and in turn she blushed, "That is, if Ino was the one Naruto chose, but I wouldn't recommend that, I mean the two just got onto speaking terms, and considering not only did Sakura punch him but that she herself has no clan she wouldn't likely be chosen, and I doubt you'd want to throw your hat into the ring Shikamaru?,"

"nope," Shikamaru said leaning on his hand,

"Oh my, then I guess Naruto would have to choose someone else, but does he know anymore clan heirs?, I Hinata Hyuga would of course be willing to help, he did save me and I am one of his oldest friends, right Naruto?," Hinata smiled at the blonde,

"uhh," Naruto eloquently articulated to the obviously affectional Hyuga heiress,

Ino stood up, and faced Hinata, "now hold on, let's not forget that it was the Hyuga clan that he saved you from, My clan is in Naruto's debt for saving me from Shukaku,"

Hinata smiled at Ino and patted her on her head, "True, but this isn't about our clans is it?, this is about us as people and our relationships to Naruto, I have always stood behind Naruto, I never made fun of him or bullied him, and I certainly never made him feel bad intentionally,"

Ino looked crestfallen, and though she fought to say something, she couldn't find the words, "..."

Hinata smiled at her "Fox got your tongue?, no wait it would be a Vixen wouldn't it?,"

Naruto stood in between them "okay that's enough," he said, he was about to say more *knock* *knock* "It's open," he called

but the door didn't open, from the side shuffling and mumbling could be heard,

Ino felt the air getting tense and began sweating,

Yakumo held Sarah tightly,

Sakura felt a familiar sense of dread and had to fight to stay on her feet,

Shikamaru turned to Naruto who held his smile, but his hands were on his knifes and his breathing was shaky,

"be prepared to run," Naruto whispered as he walked towards the door, "hello!," he called, "who's there?,"

"It's Serena are you all right?, I could hear shouting, also you left your package at the pub so I brought it with me," at that Naruto's smile became wider and he opened the door, Showing the nine foot tall woman blinking slightly before wrapping up Naruto in a tentacle, "Yes it is actually me Ruto-kun, as I am supposed to be asleep, but I found out what Teresa did and I can't believe her, putting you in a bed with other girls, what if one of them hurt you?." she asked stepping inside and letting Naruto go, handing him the box,

then she looked around, "and who are these people?,"

"uh on the sofa is Yakumo-,"

"and Sarah, don't be rude Naruto," Serena said,

"yeah Yakumo and Sarah," he rectified,

"good uh evening Miss Serena," Yakumo said, "nice tits, sweet cheeks," Sarah said,

"ah you're the two my sister helped escape, I hope she wasn't too much of a bad influence on you both,"

"she is my new girl crush, but you're catching up to her," Sarah said, "I'm sorry for Sarah's attitude, she's just a big ball of hormones and fur," Yakumo said,

Serena waved her off "oh I didn't think anything by it, she's fine to talk as she pleases, and it's nice to meet you both,"

"at the table is Shikamaru," Naruto said, pointing over to the extremely tired teen,

"hello mister Nara," Serena said as Naruto ripped open the box,

"Hi," Shikamaru said paying more attention to Naruto examining various pieces of machinery before dropping them into the box,

Serena turned to Ino and Hinata, "and you both are?,"

"I'm Ino Yamanaka," Ino huffed,

"I-I'm Hin-Hinata Hy-Hyuga," Hinata said,

Serena's expression darkened for a second, then she adjusted her glasses her face returning to her neutral state,

Sakura was about to introduce herself when Naruto pulled a wooden box out of his cardboard box "Ha!, found it," he said pulling his green scroll out,

Sakura almost admonished him but suddenly she remembered how Serena's sister reacted when she figured out who she and Sasuke were, and quickly thanked her lucky stars that Naruto had stopped her,

"and who are you?," Serena asked,

"Uh-" Sakura ran through vairous names in her head for a second before saying "I'm Temari," she lied,

"I see," Serena drawled,

Naruto unsealed a Banjo from his green scroll and opened the wooden box and took a string out of it putting on his banjo, after he had, he jumped up holding the banjo above his head "dadadadaaaaa" he sang 'you fixed the banjo, assign it to a button to play the songs of your people,' everyone but Serena shot the blonde quizzical looks,

.

..

...

then Naruto sat back down and continued rummaging through the box,

"and I thought we were weird," Sarah said, "you said it," Yakumo agreed,

Serena smiled as Naruto pulled a cog out of the box, "Ah I need this," he said, he took another identical piece out of the box, "oh and that," then he slid both pieces into his pocket, then he picked up the box and walked into his back room, he placed the box inside before shutting the door, he turned back to everyone "okay so anything else we need to talk about?," he asked, "it's getting pretty late and I think Yakumo would like a bath before bed time,"

"Not really," Sakura said, while she did want to shout at Naruto for Teresa throwing her and Sasuke out a window she didn't want Serena to know who she was,

"no," Shikamaru said hoping to leave soon so he could find Choji and explain this mess to him, hoping that this would make him realise Naruto was still to oblivious to get Ino's feelings, 'though considering she's been crushed by her own crushes twice, I doubt she'll act on anything,' He thought standing up, "In fact I had other stuff I have to do, so I think I'll just leave, later man, later Yakumo," he said waving to Naruto before walking out the open door,

"oh uh later man?," Yakumo said questioningly waving at him, "yeah later dude," Sarah said more confidently,

"Bye shika," Naruto said,

"I think I'll head home," Sakura said,

"Ah yes I'll bet your brothers are wondering where you are," Serena asked,

"my brothers?,"

"yes Gaara and Kankuro, who are waiting for you at the hotel right?," Serena smiled at her, "you did say your name was Temari right?,"

Sakura nodded "yep Temari that's me, I can't wait to see my brothers I'll bet they're worried about me," she said leaving but Serena grabbed her shoulder,

"Would you like me to walk you to your hotel, after all I wouldn't want to leave a girl like yourself out late at night," Serena said,

"oh no thanks, I'm gonna head straight there but thanks," Sakura said, practically running away from Serena,

after a few seconds Serena shook her head, "Naruto were any of your teachers paedophiles?,"

"No at least I don't think so, why?" he asked,

"Because that Sakura clearly isn't cut out to be a ninja, so now I'm wondering if someone graded her incorrectly."

"wait you knew who she was the entire time?," Yakumo asked

"Of course I did, she matches your description of her, not to mention her choice for a fake name was ridiculous, ignoring that Temari isn't a name that's rather popular in the hidden leaf and that Temari is obviously the girl from the hidden sand who looks nothing like her, she would have given it away when I questioned her about her brothers," Serena said, "I just want to mess with her, to see how long it takes the lie to crumble to ash,"

"Isn't that a bit sadistic?," Ino asked,

"Yes,"

Then Ino remembered Teresa throwing Sasuke and Sakura out a window, "Do you and your sister have something against Sakura and Sasuke?,

Serena and Naruto shared a glance, Serena downed her tea and stood up, "It's nothing, clear it from your mind," she said, Walking over to the door "farewell," but before anyone could answer Serena had been replaced by a shadow which sunk through the floor,

"okay, what was that about?," Ino asked,

Naruto stood up, "She and I have a disagreement about Haruno-san and Uchiha-san," He smiled at them "could you two go look for some clothes that would fit Yakumo in my room?,"

"y-yes," Hinata said taking Ino's hand and dragging her out of the room,

Naruto walked over to Yakumo, "ready for your bath?,"

Yakumo smiled "my how forward, are you planning to ravish my dirty naked body?," she asked

"Honestly I'd rather for anyone else to help you bathe, but I doubt you'd actually let them,"

her smile dropped "you did save me and I trust you, but I've been wearing these rags since they locked me away, I doubt I'm very pretty underneath them,"

Naruto bent down picking her up bridle style "don't worry about that, I'm just helping you wash so you don't catch any diseases," he said carrying her to the bathroom, he opened the door with his knee and walked inside sitting her on the toilet,

he turned pushing the door shut and turned on the taps plugging the drain, he lifted washing up liquid of the bath's rim and poured some in, turning back to her after he had put the bottle back,

Yakumo tugged on her rags for a moment before Naruto slid his fingers underneath, "ready?," he asked she nodded and he lifted her shirt up,

seeing her naked torso Naruto resisted the urge to throw up, Her skin was deathly pale she was malnourished to the point Naruto had no trouble seeing her skeleton, her body was scabbed, caked in dirt, unshaven hair, Naruto composed himself and looked at Yakumo's face trying to gauge a reaction from her,

but the face he saw wasn't the same she'd had when he picked her up, and he figured she'd been using a Genjutsu to hide how bad she looked, her cheeks were gaunt, her eyes were sunken in, her hair was knotted and frayed, the only thing that had stayed the same was the glint of madness in her pupils,

"how bad is it?," She asked,

"well you're going to see a doctor tomorrow,"

she bit her lip, "w-," then she closed her mouth nodding, Sarah moved in front of Yakumo "Will you stay with us?," she asked, Yakumo slapped her hand over Sarah's mouth,

Naruto took the hand off Sarah's mouth grasping it gently, "I already promised I wouln't let you both go anywhere you didn't want to, and that means if you- either of you want me there then ask and I'll never leave your sides,"

Yakumo blushed "thank you,"

A rapier appeared from nowhere and cut off the rags covering Yakumo's lower body,

But unlike her torso Naruto held back more then bile, but not out of physical disgust, over the poor girl's crotch was a breeding seal, an archaic and barbaric seal, just the sight of it boiled his blood and burned his guts and his entire body was engulfed in red chakra,

"Is that normal for you?," she asked,

"wah?," Naruto locked down at his hands they now had large dangerous looking claws made of pure chakra over them, "What is," he remembered the fox 'ah flash!, must be Their chakra,' he thought,

A familiar meek voice spoke inside his mind 'Sochi?!, are you okay,"

"Kushina?, how can I-?,"

'I'll tell you later, right now I need you to take a deep breath,'

Naruto nodded he sucked air through his gritted teeth,

'good now while that air is in your lungs close your eyes,'

Naruto did as she asked,

'Good now imagine your happy place,' Kushina said

Naruto saw the Slurred Shanties' interior both Teresa and Serena were behind the bar, Richard was serving the guests who were all his close friends, and Haku had him wrapped tightly in her arms,

'Good, now exhale and as you do focus on the feeling in your body,'

Naruto did as she asked, her voice soothing him calming him,

'good, now take a few more, and after the third try channelling chakra,'

he took a few more deep breaths and brought his hands together focusing his chakra,

after a few minuets she said 'okay now open your eyes,'

he opened them seeing a confused Yakumo in front of him she had her attention behind him, "It's fine," she said, "I wouldn't let either of you touch me anyway,"

Naruto turned both Ino and Hinata stood behind him clearly in shock, Ino just turned and walked away, "um th-the clothes are on the floor," she said following Ino,

"don't worry about that now," he said "let's get you in the tub,"

She nodded holding her arms up, he lifted her off the toilet and lowered her gently into the tub, he turned the water off, and handed her a sponge and soap she looked at both curiously before blushing "I uh don't remember how to-,"

he nodded taking both back he rubbed the sponge against the soap and for the next hour began thoroughly washing her entire body, before draining and refilling the tub and doing so again,

he dried her off with a towel helped her get dressed in the shorts and white shirt, before taking her into the living room,

Where Ino, Hinata, Sakura, Sasuke, Choji, Shikamaru, and Kiba was, in the kitchen stood Serena, Kakashi, and the old man who helped him,

everyone also noticed how Serena glared right at Kakashi who hid his own gaze in a book,

Choji stood up and stomped over to Naruto but before he could say anything several rapiers were pointed right at him,

"Yakumo," Naruto said, "lower the swords or no ice cream for desert,"

"but I'm not doing this, also what's ice cream?," Sarah raised her paw, "Yeah I'm doin' that, I'll stop," she said and the swords vanished,

Naruto looked at everyone present "Gimme a sec guy's, and we'll talk," he walked into the kitchen where a bowl of ice cream waited for Yakumo,

"thanks K-, Serena-chan," he said setting Yakumo at the table before walking to the middle of his room where everyone could see him, and sat right in the middle, "So what's up?," he asked

To his surprise Sasuke stood up and asked, "you ask us that?, after what happened?,"

"Yeah," Choji said, "when you know how Ino feels?, you bastard!,"

"I knew I was right about you," Sakura said,

"S-stop," Hinata said, "I'm s-sure he had his-"

"Stop defending him," Sakura said, "There's no excuse for what he did,"

"Never thought I'd agree with Sakura but she's right," Kiba said Akamaru barked in agreement,

Serena's gaze turned toward the children,

"STOP!," Ino shouted, She walked out in front of everyone, "why aren't you saying anything?," she asked Naruto

"I'm debating with myself," he said

she sat in front of him "on what?, we are your friends if there's a good excuse we'll listen and understand,"

Naruto grinned at her, "We disagree on that matter," he stood up, "but I'll try,"

he walked over to a wall taking a knife off his belt, he began peeling the wallpaper back, showing a large portion of his wall had crudely scrawled words written on them,

"On the day I was born my dad the fourth Hokage my lifelong hero," he said his grin souring "sealed a giant demon fox inside my stomach,"

everyone under 32 reeled at the blondes words, but he chuckled and continued "and ever since then everyone has hated me, the orphanage Ten Ten and I was at kicked me out at age four, the villagers have chased me around the village more times then I could count, and then while digging for food in the trash outside a bar two sisters invited me in and took care of me, and two struggling ramen makers fed me," he said taking wine out of his scrolls "my tests scores were screwed with, my so called team despised me, everyone I liked took their anger out of me while I smiled and let them," the story clearly hurt the blonde to tell but he chugged wine down and said "it's all really similar to right now actually,"

"Naruto I-" Ino said

"Shush," he said, "please save all questions until after the story," he drank more wine and said, "and eventually I was on a mission and while training myself cause my teacher was bedridden I met this girl, she was-," he stopped tears appeared "Haku, was beautiful inside and out, she had this compassion about her and after bonding over our similarly terrible lives we fell in love," he downed the rest of the bottle before smashing it against the wall, his forced grin turned terrifying as he said "she was the enemy so despite my cries to the bastard man who never taught me squat he still killed her, right in front of my face,"

he held out his arms "I can still feel her, dying in my arms, hear her sobs to hold her close, and whenever I shut my eyes it's her dead face staring back at me I see,"

"so I came back and after crying for months and having Sasuke whine about how he would've killed her if I hadn't been in the way, and Sakura shriek at me in general really, Oh yes and how could I forget about sensei don't-do-shit and this is a real shocker you'll all be real surprised to hear it NOT DOING SHIT, so I decided to get stronger with the only people who ever gave a damn about me, and they trained my ass into the ground, I worked till my bones ached and kept going till I passed out, then took place in the chunin exams where I nearly died so many times I decided to ask a complete stranger to help" He chuckled,

"And unlike my own teacher, the guy who makes mad money not teaching us anything Anko-chan actually agreed to train me, and just like before I trained until I passed out," he turned to Kakashi, "HEY SENSEI DON'T DO SHIT!, HOW'S IT FEEL KNOWING YOU HAD ONE JOB AND FAILED IT SO HARD THAT IT'S PURE LUCK YOU DON'T HAVE TO BURY YOUR STUDENTS?," he shouted, making Kakashi shut his eye, not that Naruto noticed,

"Anyway after all that work I did people finally took notice," he stopped "Now that I think about it Friends," the word dripped with sarcasm "Isn't tonight the first time any of you have been here?, weird that," and people started looking ashamed Naruto dropped the bottle neck he just released he was still holding, "And there it is," he said raising his arms dramatically, "Any questions?,"

Everyone was stunned silent, "oh right," Naruto said, "This was about Yakumo in the bathroom, not, right, uh so-," he pulled another bottle out and drank it whole producing another after he had finished, "well uh she," he downed the next bottle pulling another out, "she wouldn't actually let anyone else touch her so...," he trailed off shrugging before downing another bottle slumping against the wall as he did,

Naruo's closest friends looked at each other, Sasuke ignoring them walked over "Naruto I've wronged you, I pushed you away because like you I'm still trying to get over what I've lost, but I want you to know that you are my best friend,"

"Flash you," the blonde slurred, "flashin glory hound, always wanting more ya megeo- ya megio- you're a prick," the blonde said

Sakura stood up next, "You're right we've all been too rough on you for too long," she smiled "in fact why don't you and I go on a date next week, just you and me,"

"Haha," Naruto laughed "Not even If my life depended on it," he spat suddenly his eyes dimmed he resealed the bottle and handed his scrolls over to Ino before leaning against the wall again his eyes returned to normal, "that's cheating Ino-ch-, Ino-san,"

her face fell as he returned to the san honorific "Naruto, you remember that day that you tried to give me back my flower and I snapped at you and made you cry?," she asked

Naruto sobered slightly at her words, Ino took a deep breath, "For months before that day I knew I was Bi-sexual, and I had a crush on two people Sasuke and Sakura and knowing Sasuke wasn't emotionally stable enough to care for either of us, So I decided that day to tell Sakura I loved her, She rejected me hard, I didn't mean to take it out of you," She smiled at him gently "That's why Sakura's mad at you right now, cause she's regretting that she hurt me and doesn't want you to," she said, "Naruto I have something else to tell you, but she gets to go first," she gestured to Hinata, "Your turn,"

A blushing Hinata shuffled awkwardly, "I-, you-," she turned away from him taking a deep breath, she turned back, "You saved me years ago, and you got beaten pretty badly for doing it, and you stood up for me against those bullies and- and-," she took another deep breath "AND I LOVE YOU NARUTO UZUMAKI," she shouted and with a sudden burst of courage she jumped over to him and kissed him on the lips before passing out,

Ino smiled "In case it's not Obvious I love you to,'" She said pecking him on the cheek, then she turned around, anyone else?,"

"We think I love him too," Yakumo said, "but I'm not sure, I'm new to good emotions,"

after her everyone shook their heads "alright let's all go home then we've all got things to process," Ino said,

"actually," The old man said, "I'm here to take Naruto out on a mission,"

"might have to wait old man, I think I'm in shock," Naruto said,

The old man nodded "right, tomorrow it is," and with that he disappeared,

Kakashi eye smiled "well that's the worst of it, I'll take everyone home then, and answer any questions you all have," he looked at Naruto "you need anything?,"

"No I'll be fine," Naruto said,

"right," he said as everyone else had filed near the door, "Ino you coming?,"

"Yeah," she said, "See ya Naruto-kun," she said waving his scrolls in front of her before she left,

"Serena?," Naruto asked

"yes,"

"Can you call the hospital, Yakumo needs an appointment,"

"yes I know, I did it the second I got it back to the Pub, her appointment is at 8:45,"

Sarah turned to Serena while Yakumo had her face in a bowl, "how did you know we needed an appointment if you went to ''the pub'' especially as blondie here didn't mention it too ya?,"

Serena smiled at her, "The same reason I knew about you before Naruto introduced you, the same reason my sister knows what people are thinking,"

"And what's that?,"

Serena waved her hand "magic,"

Sarah's paws poked either side of her head, "Really?,"

"Maybe," Serena checked her watch "well it's been lovely seeing you all so much but if I don't get back soon I fear more money then necessary will disappear,"

Serena turned and walked to the door, "Thanks Kaa-san," the drunken Naruto said,

Serena froze the door handle in her hand "...get some rest," She said not turning to look at him,

Everything had gone quite in the apartment, after a few minuets Naruto sobered enough to realise he should move Hinata, he picked her up and carried the unconscious girl to the bedroom, pulling down the covers he placed her on the bed before tucking her in, he stumbled back into the Kitchen where Yakumo had taken her face out of the bowl and her entire face was covered in strawberry ice cream, "do I get this every night?," she asked,

Naruto shook his head, "If I can teach you how to use a spoon, then maybe," he joked grabbing a damp cloth and scrubbing her face clean,

She smiled at him and he wondered how anyone could have hurt her, he shook his head and said, "well it's time for bed,"

she grinned at him lifting her arms up he picked her up and like Hinata he carried and tucked her into bed, she smiled up at him, "good night Naruto," Sarah echoed her,

"Night Yakumo, Night Sarah," he said walking to the bedroom door and closing it,

he flopped on his sofa, removing his coat and hat he ran a hand through his long blonde hair as thoughts swirled around in his mind, soon it became obvious he wouldn't sleep, though he'd never tried it before a midnight flight sounded pleasant, but he shrugged the thought away as the girls needed him here, he quickly made two shadow clone, "You I need coffee, You sit here and listen to the girls, if anything happens get me," he said, both nodded and went to their assigned tasks while Naruto went into his workshop,

Naruto tied his hair around and turned on the radio but hearing nothing but love songs he quickly turned it off, before setting himself to work bending metal, as he did he sang "I thought I heard the old man say, leave her Johnny leave her, tomorrow you will get your pay and it's time for you to leave her,"

as Naruto worked through out the night he continued singing, as he took wheels off things, as he did the frame work he sang, "Leave her Johnny leave her, Oh leave her Johnny leave her,"

as he attached small cushions to the bent metal "Fore the voyage is long and the winds don't blow, and it's time fore us to leave her,"

as he screwed large wheels to the frame "The wind was foul and the waves ran high, leave her Johnny leave her, she shipped at green and none went by and it's time fore us to leave her-,"

The project continued into all hours of the night, though he finished before morning and took the clones place on the sofa where he eventually passed out, telling one to wake him before Yakumo's appointment,

But Naruto was not the only one who had trouble sleeping,

---

Choji was the first one home, and while at first he had tried sleeping he quickly got out of bed and left to the clans training area, It had sand bags, dummies that were bolted to the ground, he walked over to a dummy and hit it hard trying to work out his frustrations, he ran through solid blows for two hours until he knocked the dummy over,

he sat down groaning to himself, a hand from behind him offered him a towel, "trouble sleeping son?," his father asked him,

"I'm a big fat idiot," Choji said, "A friend needed me to be supportive and due to a misunderstanding I acted like a massive jerk," he said,

his dad just patted the spot next to him and Choji nodded sitting next to his father, "Today, my team met up to help Asuma and Ino through what had happened with the loss of the Third Hokage, and Ino's kidnapping, Ino said she had a crush on Naruto cause he saved her from the Ichibii, then she said that Hinata was living with him," he said taking the towel and wiping his face with it, "It made me mad, cause it was like he was playing with her feelings, then later she wanted to talk to him about it, so Kiba and I went to Ichiraku, Naruto came in carrying a girl, I got madder, later we were all called by Ino case she found the two together in the bath room, she was naked, and he was glowing red, I confronted him and-," Choji stopped, he looked his father in the eye, "Is Naruto telling the truth about the Fourth, that he sealed the Kyubii inside him?,"

His dad just nodded, "yes,"

Choji's face fell, then he slapped himself in the cheeks and stood up, "right, well from now on I'll try to be a better friend to him," he said walking over to a sandbag and punching it.

---

Shikamaru got home and barely spoke to either of his parents, telling them he just had too much on his mind and needed to mull it over, for the rest of the night he wrote down everything he could think of that Naruto had suffered from, and in the morning he swore he'd find out how true it was,

---

Sakura got home and looked at herself in the mirror, she remembered every time she'd pushed Naruto around and every time he had helped her,

Then she flexed her arm slightly frowning at how little she had changed since she had been at school and resolved to get stronger,

---

Kiba got home and just laid in his room thinking about the whole situation, when his sister came to talk to him he asked her some questions but was pretty vague about what had happened,

---

When Ino got home she sat at the dinner table where her family had been waiting for her and told them everything that had happened, they listened intently and waited for her to finish, and when she had they confirmed some of what Naruto said, then she faked a yawn and went to her room, she snuck out when her family had began quietly debating how much to tell her,

she came to her teams training ground unaware that it was already in use, soon she heard noises of a struggle and curiosity over took her, there she saw a large muscular figure with a battle axe fighting a legion of their clones, they grunted as they swung but Ino had become mesmerised as despite their choice of weapon they danced around gracefully taking down clone after clone with strong single swings, Ino sat on a nearby log watching the person go, as they did a one armed handstand slashing through one clone then using the momentum of the axe to swing themselves around hopping on their hand becoming a whirlwind of death chopping four clones up before tossing the battle axe in the air and catching it in between their feet before using their hands to launch themselves skyward landing on the last clone axe first, the figure then backflipped off the clones shoulders leaving the axe lodged in the clones skull, the figure nodded at the sight before pulling the axe free with one hand,

the figure turned to Ino and bowed "I hope you enjoyed the slaughter," they said before lifting their head showing a one eared bunny mask with the kanji for execution written on it in yellow glitter,

"Sorry for interrupting," Ino said, "I just needed to do something tonight,"

the bunny masked figure shook their hands "no no darling, I understand," they said cartwheeling over to Ino sitting next to her, "that same feeling is why I'm here tonight," they said removing their mask, "I'm Li-san," they said looking at Ino who looked into the face of a larger and stronger woman, "I feel like I failed the man I loved," she said, looking down at the mask running her hand over it, "what about you?,"

"Something similar, except something a little more complex," Ino said,

"Sounds like you could use an listener," Li-san said,

Ino nodded, "So I liked two people at first a pretty pinkette named Sakura who was my best friend until I confessed which freaked her out, the second was a handsome broody boy named Sasuke who broke my heart leaving me to carry a boy that saved me from a demon, and now I like Naruto a long haired blonde boy who saved me from the demon and may be one himself and has a boat full of problems himself, not to mention it seems like every girl in the village wants him," Ino sighed

"You know Naruto?, my what a small village we live in, just tonight little Staruto saved dear Yakumo, the Kurama clan head said as punishment they exiled her," she covered one side of her mouth, "It was just a way of making sure she couldn't be hurt by the clan anymore though,"

"Ah," Ino nodded, "So you're out here practicing because you feel as though you failed her?,"

Li-san nodded, "I did fail her, she'd been locked in that room for thirteen long years, If I had grown a spine before now-, ah but if wishes were fishes the world would be an ocean," Li-san chided herself, "I was also practicing because after Yakumo left I have been feeling a little depressed, seeing her reminded me of the man I loved, and I started thinking if he is dead then my plans to pass my fighting style down to my children is likely not to be," she looked up into the sky "something destined to be forgotten by all but our enemies," she mused,

"Not entirely," Ino said, "You'd just need to take on an apprentice, you should try the academy apprenticeships are always encouraged there,"

Li-san shook her head "No, I couldn't teach it except the way I made it, to a person at their lowest point yet with a desire to rise up, a small and delicate flower who wishes to be like iron," Li-san said, then an idea came to her, "didn't you come here to train?,"

"yeah," Ino affirmed, "wait, uh sorry but I'm fine being delicate,"

Li-san shook her head, "No I mean You want to get stronger and I need experience teaching my style to others," she said,

Ino considered the idea, "I'd get stronger, you'd get experience, and if neither of us likes it...-"

"Then we can say at least we tried," Li-san finished holding her hand to Ino,

Ino thought about using an axe to beat down her foes and smiled, "eh I always did think axes were cool," she shook Li-san's hand and they both stood up ready to train,

---

when Sasuke got home he walked through the empty streets of the Uchiha compound, the only sound that could be heard were his own steps, he passed by his families training ground walking into the main house, he picked up a lighter he always left on a table next to the door and sat on a sofa in front of a dark table, he lit two candles on either side of a picture, that showed both his parents, his father's face was pure business while his mother had a small smile, he placed the lighter down on the table,

Then he took his headband off carefully folding and placing it on the table in front of the picture and smiled at them, "Hey Tou-san, Kaa-san," he said wringing his hands, he took a deep breath, "I've done something terribly wrong, You both remember Naruto right?, He's the blonde haired boy with whisker marks," he said,

"I-, I consider him the closest person to a friend I have, and because I'm not used to being around people yet I've been unintentionally pushing him around, I saw that's how other kids talked to him so I thought it was an inside joke, and now I realise that this whole time he's been hurting, and while he'd been hurting-," Sasuke's mouth felt like cotton, "I-," he hung his head in shame, "I tried to take credit for defeating the Ichibii, when he defeated it," he said,

"He was unconscious, I saw him and Ino and left them both there figuring If I took credit for beating it the village would give me more Jutsu I could use to kill Itachi, I thought that after I'd just explain it to them and they'd understand,"

Sasuke shook his head, "Remember back when I told you both about wave?, that Naruto was sad we'd killed an enemy, I thought he just thought she was attractive and didn't want her to die," Sasuke's fists tightened "Today, the way he talked about her, I knew it was more then that, He actually loved her and I mocked him for getting in my way, our teacher killed her and her father figure right in front of him," Sasuke looked down at his head band, "like Itachi did,"

Sasuke leaned back into the sofa, "and he's been dealing with us pushing him around, and yet he never tries to hurt us," he said, his respect for the blonde rose, "Naruto is going on a mission tomorrow, I'm going to ask for a few days off training so I can explore how the village feels about Naruto, and find out if there's a way I can apologise to my friend and get him to forgive me,"

Sasuke picked up the picture kissing both his parents faces, "Goodnight, I love you both," he said, laying down and watching as the candles slowly dimmed,

---

After taking the kids home Kakashi never even thought of returning home himself, Instead he knocked on Anko's door, he was surprised that Anko answered the door so quickly, she smirked at him, "sup Kakashi?, there a mission I'm needed for?,"

"No Anko, listen Naruto kinda had a little breakdown and snapped, he tore into me and his team, he made me realise how far I've fallen," he said, "I need you to call him in the morning and talk to him, and maybe take over my duties as his teacher for a bit,"

Anko leaned against the frame, "Really?, damn well I'd love too but uh, you see," she blushed before shaking her head, "I mean yeah why not?," she shrugged before glaring at him slightly, "what will you be doing?,"

"Tonight?, lesson plans for Sakura, maybe some light workouts, tomorrow I'm teaching her about elemental Jutsu, Taijutsu, as much as I can," he said, "oh and don't worry about training him tomorrow he's going on a mission with Jiraya," he said,

"what?," she asked

he shrugged, "well gotta go," he said turning but she grabbed his shoulder,

"Lemme get my coat, we'll train together I could use the exercise,"

she walked inside and quickly got dressed walking past Asuma and Kurenai hugging on the sofa and with a quick explanation to them and the duo was out the apartment,

---

Naruto was shaken from his sleep by a clone "Boss It's time to wake up," the clone said

"Huh?," Naruto opened his eyes instantly reeling from the light "flashin blinds," he moaned sitting up, the clone handed him a cup of coffee and dispelled,

Naruto chugged the caffeine down before walking to the bedroom door, he knocked "Girls, it's time to get up," he said, hearing no response he pushed open the doors,

On the other side both girls were sitting on the bed completely nude, Yakumo's hand was over Hinata's mouth, Yakumo smiled "Weeeee'reee naaaaaaaaked," she sang, Sarah smiled as Naruto turned and left as the puppet said "Enjoy seeing us in your dreams,"

after he slammed the door shut Yakumo turned to Hinata, "So why'd you cover your mouth with my hand?," Sarah nodded "and why didn't cha want us ta tell handsome we were nude?,"

Hinata blushed "Because girls, I've loved him for most of our lives and now Ino wants him, which may not be a problem but then there's that ramen girl, and with Gaara wanting Naruto to marry him?, her?, whatever!, and there may be more so I've got to use every trick in the book there is to make him mine,"

Yakumo nodded but Sarah asked "That's good and all but how ain't cha passed out?, Ain't cha like super shy?,"

Hinata turned to both girl and rabbit and said, "Love, willpower, and whenever I feel like I'm about to faint I picture Him and Ino getting married," she said shivering, "now If I'm gonna get him I may need both of your help,"

"How's that?," Sarah asked,

Hinata smiled "First we have to look really cute and happy together which will make him realise that I'm a better parent then Ino, and a better choice for the loco parentis thing, second if you find any porn stashed around here show it to me it'll show me what he likes, and third you'll have to help me get over my shyness so I can actually do stuff with him, like hugging and kissing,"

"Sure," Yakumo said, 'we like him too so why are we helping?,' Sarah asked mentally, Yakumo asked, 'Cause if she discovers anything we can use it to our advantage, and we can invite the other girls too, and use what we learn to help them,' Yakumo thought,
Sarah nodded but asked 'okay but what other girls?,' Yakumo put a hand to her chin 'Like Ino, Gaara, anyone really cause if we help them get in with Naruto then we may be able to figure out how we feel about him, If we love him then we can just remind the girl with him that it was because we helped and they owe us, if we don't then he has a girl and we can just be together as a family,' she thought,

Sarah nodded "Gotcha," she said,

"Uh got what?," Hinata asked,

"Oh Sarah and I think that with our help you'll be the first girl to give Naruto a blowjob," Yakumo said,

Hinata turned bright red, "With-?, the first-?, B-b-b-blowjob?," Hinata's eyes rolled into the back of her head and she passed out,

"Huh, she's gonna need a lotta help," Sarah said poking Hinata's cheek, "Oh Naaaaaaaaaruuuuuuutooooo, Hinata passed out, You'll have to come in and dress us," Yakumo sang, "also if it weren't clear last night, you're gonna have to dress us every day," Sarah said,

"...Us?, Wait Sarah's naked too?," he asked,

"Ooooo," Sarah said "looks like his eyes weren't drawn ta my nude body," Yakumo gasped "So who'd he stare at?, Me or Hinata?,"

"please stop," Naruto said opening the door, "why were you b- all naked anyway?,"

"I'll tell you later," Yakumo said,

Naruto helped Yakumo get dressed before reluctantly dressing the unconscious Hinata while Yakumo teased him, and dressing Sarah at the puppets request,

Yakumo was wearing an old Kimono Naruto never wore, it covered her up and she seemed to like it, Sarah somehow had a dress with her and Naruto helped her put it on before carrying Yakumo into the living room where the project he worked all last night on was,

"wow," Yakumo swooned seeing an immaculate wheelchair built just for her, "what is it?," she asked,

"It's a wheelchair, I built it just for you," he said lowering her into it before strapping her in, "how's it feel?," he asked

Yakumo leaned into the chair, "comfy," she breathed,

Naruto smiled at her kneeling down to put her feet on the foot rest, "good, I did us part of my sofa to make it comfortable for you,"

"you didn't have too," she said,

"Well as much as I enjoy carrying a beautiful girl such as yourself around, it's good to have a way you can get around without me if I'm taking a nap, and it needs to be really comfy if you're going to be in it all day,"

She smiled at him "thank you,"

he patted her on the head "You're very welcome," then he wheeled her to door unlocking and opening it he pushed her through before closing and locking it pushing the key through the post box, then taking the handles of the wheelchair he split himself at the waist floating himself and Yakumo in the wheelchair over the railing while his legs ran down the stairs he re-joined himself and pushed her to the hospital,
on the way some villagers glared at them glared at them until Sarah morphed into a mix of her hand puppet form and her her medium sized one and began growling back at the stunned villagers showing her razor sharp knifelike teeth and claws that made the onlookers realise they had much better things to do and quickly leave, Sarah morphed back and Yakumo patted her on the head saying "good girl,"

As they entered the hospital Naruto walked over to the receptionist "excuse me, I had an appointment made for my friend last night,"

the receptionist nodded typing something into the computer "Name please?,"

Naruto opened his mouth to speak but Yakumo spoke first "Yakumo Uzumaki," the receptionist nodded typing the name in,

Naruto was about to tell her that they needed to use her real name but the receptionist said, "Yep Yakumo Uzumaki, you're a bit early if you'll both just take a seat over there and I'll contact Dr Kafka," Naruto thanked the lady before wheeling Yakumo over to the sitting area,

"Sooo..." Yakumo drawled after a few seconds of waiting, "why the long hair?,"

Naruto smiled at her, "after wave while I was training myself into the ground I forgot to cut it, when I was forced to take a day off to rest I saw how long it had gotten," he said playing with a lose strand of his hair, "I liked how it looked so I keep it long now,"

"cool, so can you braid it?,"

He grinned "With my eyes shut,"

"Braid ours while we're waiting," Yakumo said,

Naruto chuckled as she wheeled herself in front of him and leaned her hair back, Naruto took her hair in one hand and realising he didn't have a comb had his other split and recombine until it resembled one, he began combing her hair, and after a few seconds he quietly hummed a tune to himself as he braided her hair,

after he'd finished her he braided Sarah's hair surprised at how real it felt, when he finished a Doctor called for Yakumo, and after wheeling Yakumo over to her they followed the Doctor down a corridor and into a room,

Where she sat in a chair and after offering Naruto one introduced herself, "Hello, I'm Doctor Kafka, and I'm here to evaluate Miss Yakumo, I heard she has a little friend who can help me?," she said,

Sarah nodded "Don't worry doc, I'll tell you what's really going on in her mind,"

Dr Kafka smiled "that's all I ask," After she said that Yakumo went through a myriad of tests, ranging from medical tests to Psychological ones, from reflex tests to ink blot tests, from blood pressure to word association, it ended with a full body examination and with some coaxing from Naruto Yakumo agreed to let the doctor see her without the genjutsu but refused to take Sarah off her hand,

Naruto split his hands off and lifted Yakumo up so the doctor could examine her entire body, Dr Kafka walked around the floating girl examining her entire body writing down things on a clipboard, after the doctor felt she had examined everywhere Yakumo would allow with Sarah growling when the Dr got to a part Yakumo didn't want to talk about, as she was fine with the two to three seconds the doctor checked her breasts, but the second the doctor kneeled to examine her crotch Sarah grew arms and pulled the doctor back to her feet, with Naruto acting as a mediator he got Yakumo to agree to let Dr Kafka check her legs and feet,

after a few minuets the Doctor had Naruto dress Yakumo and put her back in the wheelchair, before distracting her by challenging her to balance a thermometer on her nose, when Yakumo took the bait Dr Kafka grabbed Naruto's arm dragging him to the other side of the room,

"Where the hell did you find her?," The doctor whispered, "she's not well in any sense of the word," she took a breath before saying, "Sarah being real in her mind I expected, But to her Sarah is the only thing she thinks is real, she believes she's trapped in a place she calls ''her room'' and that everything she's seeing is just something she subconsciously created to make her and Sarah less lonely, she also once referred to another personality called Ido-chan but both her and Sarah refused to say anything else, but that's not the worst of it, but before I say another word where the hell was she?,"

"Kurama clan compound, she was the heiress before being banished last night, she was trapped inside a vault like room for long period of time,"

"how long?," Dr Kafka asked,

Naruto shrugged and doctor Kafka gestured to Yakumo, Naruto nodded, "Yakumo?," he asked "Is their anything You remember from before you were locked in your room?,"

"Some Mina whatever died doing something about a fox," she said her attention entirely on the thermometer,

"Minato Namikaze?," Naruto asked,

"Sounds about right," Yakumo said, "He must've been dumb everyone knows foxes are more scared of you then you are of skinning them,"

Both doctor Kafka and Naruto's shocked expressions met each other "thirteen years," the doctor's mouth just hung open,

Naruto needing something to distract himself asked "How bad is her body?,"

Doctor Kafka shook her head, "Mister Uzumaki, do you know what A.B.D. means?,"

Naruto's eyes widened he dropped to his knees, "no," he groaned out, after a few seconds he spoke, "A.B.D., All But Dead," he whispered,

"We don't have the medicine nor the knowledge to treat her in time, only one person in the world can save her now, Tsunade Senju," she said, "that is if you could even find her in two weeks, which is about when her body will shut down, give or take a few days,"

"So I have a week?," he asked, "a week to find Tsunade Senju and get her to save Yakumo?,"

"either that, or to get her to understand exactly what's going to happen to her,"

Naruto looked back at Yakumo trying and failing to balance the thermometer on her nose "No," he said, "she's going to make it," he looked Dr Kafka in the eyes, "I won't let her just die,"

He got to his feet and he started walking to Yakumo but Dr Kafka grabbed his arm, "If you manage to get her body out of the red, then You'll have to work on her mentality, though she believes everything but her hand puppet is an illusion she does have a fixation on you, which if I'm right is a mixture of gratitude for you saving her from something bad and cause she's a sixteen year old girl who's still going though puberty having not seen a boy in years, as in lust, she might try something on you, so be prepared for that," Dr Kafka said, "the way to help her mental state is, and considering I just told you she may try to rape you, you must never let her out of your sight, not to ever let her out of your reach," Dr Kafka shook her head, "did you touch her vagina last night?,"

Naruto was about to deny that but then he remembered when he bathed her, "I-," he put a hand over his mouth, "I think I did,"

Dr Kafka nodded, "I thought you might have, she said that something happened last night with you and it felt amazing, don't worry about that by the way, as a ninja you're legally an adult and because she was exiled from her clan she's technically not a person, which we can deal with when Konohana has a Hokage,"

"But she'll think-"

"Yakumo if she understood what you did would fully believe she made you pleasure her, and let's not forget she might try to get you to do it again, or may force you to do it," Kafka warned, "regardless of how much you want to help her you might have to do certain things with her to calm her down,"

Naruto rubbed his cheek remembering that Yakumo's swords could actually cut him, "Whatever happens don't let her use anything but her mouth, you might kill her if you tried anywhere else,"

"but where do I start looking for Tsunade?,"

"Well that's simple," a voice by the window said, The old man who helped him save Yakumo before said, "I know exactly where Tsunade Senju is,"

"where?," Naruto asked,

"Tanzaku Quarters, it's a three day walk," the old man said "I explained everything to the girl at your apartment and she helped me pack your bag and hers,"

"Why are you helping me?," Naruto asked

the old man smiled "Cause I'm..." he stopped his smile drooping, "Jiraya the great Toad Sage," he said shaking his head, "I'll meet you by the Village gate," he said jumping out the open window,

Yakumo giggled, "I like him," she said,

Naruto shook his head "whatever, he's helping, thanks for helping Dr, but I think we'd better run," he said grabbing the wheelchair's handles and running pushing Yakumo out the room,

Doctor Kafka leaned out the door, "GOD SPEED MR UZUMAKI," she shouted,

"Weeeeeee," Yakumo cheered as Naruto sprinted to the village gates, dodging past street vendors and bystanders as he ran,

he skidded to a stop seeing everyone who'd come to his house last night and Anko, Jiraya waiting behind them,

"Okay everyone not to sound like a dick but time is of the essence, I have at worst a week to-," he stopped, looking down at Yakumo, "uh to deliver ale, before it goes bad." he said,

Everyone looked at each other so Jiraya said, "Kid," Naruto looked at him "They know,"

Sakura nodded, "He's right go now, we'll be waiting for you to get back anyway,"

"If anyone can do It you can," Ino said, her words brought cheers, Naruto nodded, "right, I'll be back in three to four days, I'll see you then,"

Naruto walked by them seeing a nod from Sasuke, which made him smile as he returned, he continued running again hearing cheers behind him, He could hear them all,

"Be s-safe!," Hinata cheered,

"Keep running!," Sakura shouted,

"Yeah don't let uh the ale go bad!," Kankuro exclaimed,

"I'll have a bowl of ramen ready for you both!," Choji cried

"Run Like Nai-chan is chasing you Ruto-kun!," Anko laughed sadistically,

"Go Naruto go!," Sasuke hollered,

"You beat Shikaku, a run can't stop you!," Temari yelled,

"Protect her!," Gaara called,

"Don't make me pick up your slack!," Kiba bellowed and Akamaru barked in agreement,

"Don't be late like that do-nothing sensei of yours!," Kakashi shouted, which made Anko slap his shoulder,

"We believe in you!," Shikamaru spoke loudly,

Ino took a deep breath "If you miss the deadline I'll kick your ass!," she roared

Naruto had tears in his eyes as he ran, "heh," Jiraya chuckled, "those are some good friends you've made,"

Naruto nodded, "The best,"

"Why are they so concerned with ale though?," Yakumo asked, "Yeah next thing you know somebody will start getting super attached to inanimate objects," Sarah said, "you said it best friend," Yakumo said before the two hugged,

Both Naruto and Jiraya ran full speed onwards to Tanzaku Quarters where Tsunade Senju was, they didn't rest for a moment, Jiraya's eyes turned to his younger companion, 'damn I didn't have the guts to tell him earlier, If I had come back earlier he might not hate me,' he thought, 'I wonder how long until he can't run anymore, judging by how he's running I'd give him about thirty minuets, will he use the foxes chakra when his own stamina fails?, or will he force himself to keep moving,'

Just then Naruto skidded to a halt, "huh?," Jiraya asked, "not getting tired are ya kid?," he asked

"I just remembered," he said,

"hmm?,"

he looked Jiraya in the eyes, "I can flashin fly," he spread his arms out "why am I running?," he cried, "get on my back and I'll launch us halfway there,"

Jiraya rolled his eyes "sure you will,"

"wanna bet I can't?," The blonde asked holding out his hand,

"I've seen your wallet so sure," he said clasping the blonde's hand "If you can't this trip is on you,"

"and if I can you tell me what you were going to say at the hospital," Naruto nodded,

"sounds fair," Jiraya said putting his hands on the blonde's back channelling chakra into his fingers to stick himself to the blonde's back, "I'm ready," he said,

Naruto quickly sealed Yakumo's wheelchair in a hidden seal on his knife belt, holding her bridle style, "I'm ready," she said,

"Good," Naruto said Red chakra ran through Naruto's legs, "Bara-Bara BLAST OFF!," he shouted and suddenly they all felt a large wind pressure before as fast as it came it was gone,

They opened their eyes white surrounded them, "where are we?," Sarah asked,

"Are we dead?," Jiraya asked, "If we are kid you owe it to me to protect me from your mother,"

'like Sochi would,' Kushina said, Naruto just grinned as the white started fading,

"Wait are we?," Jiraya asked, before he started grinning himself "Flying?," he asked as the clouds cleared showing several towns below, "WHOOOO HOOOOOO," Jiraya shouted "We're flying,"

"So Jiraya, which town is it?," Naruto asked

Jiraya chuckled "That one," he said pointing to a town with a castle, "That's Tanzaku Quarters," he said,

"Right I'll bring us in for a landing," Naruto said,

"wait," Yakumo said, "If you didn't know he could fly how did you think he caught me in mid air?,"

Jiraya chuckled "Well Kushina his Kaa-san had a trick she called Kage-Bushin-Ho! where she had her clones throw her at things and before she fell she made more in mid air and had them pass her to a trail of clones leading safely to the ground, I thought that's just what he did,"

"So you knew my Kaa-chan?, is that what you were going to say?," Naruto asked,

"Oh much worse" Jiraya said, "but I'll tell you after Tsunade heals your friend, that way you're not worried about anyone,"

"Fair enough," Naruto said,

After ten minutes Naruto brought them safely to the ground, and while the blonde unsealed Yakumo's wheelchair Jiraya looked around, "Right," Jiraya said, "Tsunade is a drinker and a gambler, so since I have know the good bars around here that's where I'll look, you two take the Casino's, here," he said handing them a picture of a gorgeous thirty something woman with huge breasts drinking,

"That's Tsunade?," Yakumo asked taking the photo, Jiraya nodded summoning a small toad,

"I'll have a toad get you if I find her," he said putting the toad on Naruto's head, "Gammakichi here will get me if you do,"

"Right," Naruto nodded, He saw some flashing lights in the distance, "I think I can see a casino over there I'll head over right now," he said walking towards it while Jiraya went in the opposite direction, unbeknownst of the two of them the scene was watched by a blue haired woman wearing a black coat with red clouds, she watched them both split and followed the boy wondering how he knew Jiraya,

On his way to the casino Naruto passed by a tea shop where two men with the same coats as the woman were exiting just as he walked by, "Itachi isn't that the one leader wanted us to get?," A blue shark man asked,

Itachi checked a picture he had in his pocket, "It would seem so Kisame,"

"Heh ain't we lucky?," Kisame asked as they followed the boy,

Naruto continued walking forward unaware of his followers, as he did he was noticed by another man in the same cloak this one had Long blond hair that covered on of his eyes, "Sasori-san," he said, "Look Itachi's following that kid," he said showing the hump backed man the blonde boy, "You think that's his brother un?," the man asked

"Deidara that doesn't look a thing like him," Sasori said

"Maybe, but Itachi wants him so I'm gonna get him first" and he began following him as well, Sasori rolled his eyes but followed his partner to limit the damage he'd likely cause,

As they got to the casino a red haired man walked out "Have fun Kakazu I'm gonna get some of my older tats re-inked," he said bumping into Yakumo's wheelchair, "Sorry," he said, "I wasn't watching where I was going," the man said, before seeing behind the boy, "You guys are here too?," he asked,

"Kuze," Itachi said, "that is the one Leader-san told us to find, I'd suggest standing away from him,"

"Really?," the blue haired woman asked dropping from above, "I saw him with Jiraya of the Sanin, I followed as I was curious to how he knew him," she said,

"Lady Konan you're here as well?," Sasori asked sliding in from the left with his smirking partner, "I'm afraid Deidara saw Itachi tailing the boy and came to get him first," he said pointing to the blonde haired man who glared right at the Itachi,

"Kuze what's going on out here?," A man wearing a mask asked, but upon seeing everyone else outside, "are you all finally here to kill me?, cause you're all worth a lot and I've been waiting for an excuse to kill every last one of you," he asked walking outside,

"No," Kuze said, "apparently they followed this little one here Kakazu," he said pointing at the blonde with the frog on his head,

"He is our target," Kisame grinned taking his sword off his back,

"Itachi wants him, I want him un," Deidara growled,

"He knows Jiraya," Konan said,

Suddenly they all took a step towards Naruto who began looking around "Uh, STAY BACK!," he shouted "Or I'll-," he reached into his coat to unseal a cannon only to realise that one: he wasn't wearing his coat, and two: Ino taken his scrolls the night before, "uh," he struck a pose, "I'll do something really impressive," he said,

"Yeah," Yakumo cheered, "don't cha know who dis here is?," Sarah asked getting into the red haired man's face,

"Uh no?," Kuze said,

"He beat the Ichibii, he beat the entire Hyuga clan single handily," Yakumo said,

"well actually Neji helped as well-," Naruto said

"Without any help whatsoever," Sarah shouted,

"but Neji fought some of them before I even got there," Naruto stated

"ALL ALONE," Yakumo shouted

"but I-," a glare from his apparent hype team stopped him and he sighed, "yeah completely alone,"

"See?," Sarah asked "he even admits it,"

"And maybe he actually did do both of those," Konan stated "but we still have to capture him,"

"Well I'm outta ideas," Sarah said, "Me too," Yakumo mumbled then they both cried "Save us Naruto!."

"Okay stand back!," Naruto said using the ram sign "Or I'll use the Jutsu that took down the Third Hokage in one shot,"

Every Akasuki's eye's went to Itachi, 'does he mean that Jutsu?,' he wondered, "Nothing comes to mind," he lied smoothly secretly preparing to copy the Jutsu

everyone turned back to the blonde, "I'm warning you all," he said, "I'd rather not use my all or nothing move," he said,

"All or nothing?," Yakumo repeated, "yeah seems like we should keep watching," Sarah said

Everyone took another step forward, "Alright I'm a Clown of my word," Naruto said charging Chakra 'Sorry Jiji, but I did promise to only use this when there was no other option,' he thought

A cloud of smoke engulfed the streets Kuze pulled a chain out of his body and began spinning it while Kakazu blew a wind jutsu removing the clouds revealing a naked sexy blonde inside them, "Hey booys," she cooed posing for them,

"..." the men just stared at her with slacked jaws

"My it's so cold out here," she said shivering slightly "would anyone care to warm me up?," she asked winking,

Each male in the crowd and not just the Akasuki men were all rocketed back by massive nose bleeds, Konan who was mostly un affected was preoccupied trying not to get covered with blood

The blonde girl smirked "I warned ya," she said before picking up Yakumo and bolting down the street,

Konan stood to her feet, "After him!," she shouted leaping dramatically onto a roof, she turned back to the still dazed men, "or I'll tell Leader-san you were all beaten by a E rank jutsu," They all jumped to their feet, and charged after the blonde,

Naruto ran down the streets and Yakumo looked at him, "So this is your final move?," She asked, Sarah smirked "I liked da part where ya showed 'em your naughty bits,"

"Well a Ninja must use every tactic to their advantage," Naruto said sagely, "And since Kunoichi have higher kill counts then men I decided at a young age to harness the immense power of sexiness," He said releasing the jutsu,

"And by all that what you really mean is that hormones got cha early, so you began reading porn and after a while you got curious and you decided to transform into a girl version of yourself to see if you could, saw that people treat you nicer, something happed to remove your clothes and when when all the men fainted you decided to start pointing it at people and realised how effective T and A really is?," Sarah asked,

"Yeah pretty much," Naruto sheepishly admitted, splitting himself around a cabbage vendor,

"When I grow up I wanna be just like you," Sarah said,

Suddenly a flock of crows swarmed above them while Kuze repapered behind them swinging a chain with a hook on the end,

'Can't get too high or move too slow now,' Naruto thought "Yakumo, Sarah tell me if someone behind me does anything, Gammakichi tell me What's happening above" he said,

Both nodded looking over his shoulders, as Naruto bolted forward sprinting down a path that led further into Tanzaku qaruters, 'If Jiraya found Tsunade and I find them maybe these guys will back off,' he thought, he opened his mouth to shout for Jiraya, but a piece of paper covered his mouth and stuck to his face with chakra, 'Flashin enemy ninja,' he growled internally as he dodged Various bystanders,

"Uh Why are you and the Frog covered in paper?," Yakumo asked,

"Mmmmmmmm!," Gammakichi said trying to jump off Naruto's head but was kept on by the paper on his feet,

"Must be a fashion thing," Sarah said, "Hook coming!," Yakumo cried, Naruto nodded kicking a barrel behind him, he hook grabbed the barrel and yanked it into a head but from Kuze who didn't even seem affected by it,

Naruto saw Deidara waiting for him at the end of the street messing with some clay, "Catch this, un." he said throwing it at him and in mid air it morphed into a tiger and ran right at him, Naruto skidded barely managing to turn down a small alleyway where with both the chain man and the clay tiger hot on his heels he quickly picked up speed,

Running out the end Naruto was hit by a metal tail and launched into the air where the crows engulfed him but Yakumo summoned a several rapiers taking one in her hand and making the others float behind her as she fought off the swarm each blade followed her movements and she quickly broke their hold on Naruto who jumped onto the floor,

A chain launched at him but Sarah launched herself off Yakumo's hand returning to her medium sized form she caught the hook in her teeth, "Saddle up handsome," the giant rabbit said, "I'm taking you for a ride," And she dragged Kuze back down the side street he chased Naruto through The crows broke off from Naruto following the giant rabbit,

Naruto jumped back dodging another strike from the metal tail this time he used it to launch himself further down the street as the clay tiger returned it's pursuit, Naruto sprinted down the streets as Yakumo launched swords at the tiger they pierced it but it just kept running after them,

A shadow loomed over them and Yakumo looked up, "Uh the blue haired lady is back," she said,

Konan using her wings and her view spun in mid air raising her arms she blocked all pathways except ones leading to the square,

Naruto continued dodging around the bystanders as well as paper attacks from Konan he grinned seeing a white haired man in the distance, and picked up speed, he skidded to a stop turning his attention to the white haired man who turned to him Naruto groaned seeing Kisame In a wig with Kakazu as they both finished a familiar jutsu,

"Suiton: Suiryudan no Jutsu," they both said making three water dragons rise from the fountain and charge at the blonde, Naruto jumped spinning in mid air so the attack hit his back he curled around Yakumo trying to protect her,

The attack flung them into the air where Konan grabbed the blonde, "How do you know Jiraya?," she asked, Naruto gritted his teeth refusing to answer "well I'll know soon enough anyway," she said as a chain wrapped around Naruto, Konan let go of him before the chain pulled them out of Tanzaku quarters and into the surrounding woodlands, Naruto saw a river stream below him and with the fear it was salt water he split his arms off carrying Yakumo safely to the ground while he was slammed into it,

As Naruto was submerged he felt his strength fading before he was pulled out, "Sorry for the dip," Kuze said pulling him off the hook, "But I didn't want to smash you into paste so it seemed like a good idea," he said setting the blonde down next to Yakumo and Sarah, both of whom had been chained up, Kuze then took Gammakichi off Naruto's head before wrapping him into a ball of chains,

The rest of the Akasuki dramatically appeared with Deidara and Sasori dropping in from the sky off a clay bird, Kisame menacingly stalking out of the trees with a sadistic grin, Kakazu leaping out of the trees landing on a large rock which made it crack, the crow swarm dive bombing a certain spot and forming Itachi who lifted his head giving Naruto an even stare, and then a bright light appeared and a chorus of angels sang out as Konan gracefully descended from the light, then they turned to Kuze, he blinked "Oh right," he ran back into the woods then he jumped out of the trees throwing his hook at the ground yanking himself towards it chains appeared out of his arm and wrapped around it as he elbow dropped the ground,

they turned back to Naruto, "well who won?," Asked Deidara,

"Mmmmm?," Naruto said, Konan snapped her fingers and the paper flew off his mouth, "red eyed guy," he said

Itachi nodded "It was only natural he'd choose me,"

"How'd I do?," Konan asked, "I've been practicing the angel chorus for months,"

Naruto crossed his arms in thought, "Well If you came out before red eyed guy had, I'd have picked you, but with his it's all the crows cawing as they mash their bodies together and slowly being silenced as they morph into him eventually ending with a sharingan stare, and yours's had the light and the song which was all done well but just the fact he did it first made him win,"

"what about me?," Kisame asked,

"Simple, but effective, third place," Naruto said, "you know what I'll just rank you all now, number one is red eyed guy with the blue haired woman slightly behind him, after them is the shark guy who used less is more to it's full effect, the masked man comes out next using quick movements and a landing that cracked a boulder keeping himself mysterious but showing some power, then both the humped guy and the blonde man drop in from the sky but one did it way better as while the blonde man tried for a heroic landing with a dramatic standing up, seeing the other drop outta the sky like a stone was way funnier which make him rank higher in my opinion, and finally the red haired guy who looked like he had no idea what he was doing and just ripped off everyone else,"

"That's fair," Kuze said,

"Well time to capture you," Konan said,

Naruto jumped to his feet cringing slightly when he landed as pain tore through his back, he fell to one knee as his hands attached to his arms before he reached behind him touching his fingers to his back he felt blood and scars from the impact of the dragon, "Gah," he cried as another jolt of pain came from his back,

"Don't struggle," Konan warned solemnly, "this will all be over soon,"

Naruto forced himself to his feet and ran at the woman he summoned a clone behind him and grabbed it's hands swinging it at her foot first she grabbed the clones leg and pulled hitting Naruto against the ground, "AHHH," he screamed, Konan took a step away from him,

"If you don't want the pain to continue, then stay down and I swear no more harm will come to you," she said,

Naruto groaned forcing himself to his feet, his breathing was heavy but he pushed through the pain and looked her in the eyes forcing a grin, "Lady, you can keep hitting all you want, but I came here today for a reason," he took his knives out of his belt "And until I do what I came here to do, Not even death will stop me," He said pointing his knives at her,

"STOP!," Yakumo shouted, drawing Naruto's attention, "They clearly want you, if you run they'll chase you, so why don't you leave me and run?,"

"I can't do that," Naruto stated,

"You'll die if you keep fighting," Yakumo said,

"She's right," Kisame said, "Honestly It's impressive you can even stand, but even if you managed to beat Konan, one of us would just take her place,"

"See?," Yakumo said "Just run, If you do you might get away,"

Naruto laughed again, "Don't worry," he said pointing his knives at Konan, "I'll do everything in my power to save you,"

Suddenly water rose up from the stream forming hundreds of sharks, chains grew out of the ground, sheets of paper danced around the sky, Deidara flew around on his clay bird, and Itachi melted into crows,

Naruto summoned a thousand clones, "but whatever happens," he said sheathing his knives "I will never abandon you,"

"Now it's time to stop Naruto," Itachi said, appearing behind Yakumo, he held his hand out to him, "come, it's time to leave,"

Naruto growled at him, "Leave her alone!," he said,

Itachi shook his head, "If you come with us willingly, I will take Yakumo to Tsunade personally," he said,

"How can I trust you?," Naruto asked,

Itachi reached into his coat, "because you always have before," he said pulling out a mask that Naruto recognised instantly,

"We-Weasel-Nii?," Naruto asked, "Is that you?," And in that single instant of trust Naruto made a crucial error, looking into Itachi's Sharingan,

Naruto stopped "UCHIHA BASTARD!," the blonde roared as red chakra engulfed him his eyes dyed red and his pupils slitted, "I WILL NEVER BE MANIPULATED BY YOUR KIND AGAIN!,"

"Ah the nine tails has appeared, Kuze?," Itachi said looking into the red haired mans eyes,

Kuze nodded and chains wrapped around Naruto's body dispelling the red chakra, "Got him,"

"An Uzumaki and an Uchiha?, interesting but these chains only dispel my chakra," 'Naruto' shut his eyes, His long blonde hair turned red and his red eyes purple,

"Itachi, I can't believe you," the voice made Itachi stop, his focus broken his eyes returned to normal,

"Kushina?," he asked, "how?,"

Kushina took a breath making two water dragons that destroyed the chains, she put her hands on her hips, "I should be asking you that young man, You killed your own father, your mother, you've made your own brother obsessed with killing you, why?," she asked,

"My mother?," Itachi asked closing his eyes, "I see," he said reactivating his Sharingan, "give up," he warned,

Kushina smiled spinning one of Naruto's knives, "You first," a water tiger jumped out of the stream and smashed behind Kushina who spun around and using only the knife in her fingers she sliced every drop of it,

Then she smirked "Well, it seems I'm ready to go how about you?,"

Itachi stood still before he realised Kushina's strategy, he nodded, "Very well, I will show you how far I've gone to be the perfect warrior but I'll warn you," He pointed a kunai at her, "I have become far more powerful then Konoha's Tiger and Dragon combined,"

She smiled "let's see how true that is," chains shot from out of her back, and she spun the knife around the chains reached out picking up a knife each, "Shall we dance?," she asked curtsying,

Itachi became a mass of crows and flew into the air the crows turned to her "Katon: Gokakyu No Jutsu,"

Kushina smirked "Kage Bushin no Jutsu," she said making forty of her appear each ran through Handsigns quickly "Suiton: Mizuboso," they all said blasting a stream of water out of their mouths, the crows all blew fire at her but the water put them out,

Itachi was suddenly behind her he threw a kunai at her, she spun catching it and as she turned again she thrust it into his stomach, before she vanished and a water stots crashed into his back Kushina smiled "Suiton: Suiryu Kobaku," the shots combined into a massive dragon in the air that bit down on Itachi and smashed him into the ground,

when the water faded it revealed a ball of chakra chains before Kushina popped out, "Impressive Taichi-kun, genjutsu that confuses the targets identity always was your speciality, but the Kyubii isn't effected by that trick, and while she hates me, she hates Uchiha and losing to Uchiha more," Kushina said, "It's a good thing your new friends didn't join in, after all I'm not used to fighting in my Sochi's body, I might die if they all came at once,"

"Which is partially why they didn't," Itachi said, "Our goal is to capture all Jinjuriki including the Kyubii's host alive,"

"Huh good to know," Kushina said falling to one knee, "well my time here is nearly done," she said standing and walking over to Yakumo she kneeled over her, "don't worry sweetheart, you'll think of something," then Kushina's purple eyes faded to dazed blue again,

"Fall unconscious Uzumaki," Itachi said, and as he did Naruto complied, as the weapons hit the ground the chains coming out of the ground disappeared as well, "Naruto is coming with us, and we're going to remove the Kyubii from him which will kill him," Itachi said his eyes meeting Yakumo's own,

'fight' the word echoed inside Yakumo's mind as she watched Naruto turn and walk towards Konan, Yakumo shook her head, "No," she said "this doesn't end this way,"

"and why not?," Asked Itachi,

"Because. . . I . .want him," A seal appeared on the side of Yakumo's face before it cracked and shattered, A ghostly arm appeared from behind her and stuck Itachi right in the face the force of the blow threw him into a tree, Yakumo's fingers glowed and she pointed at Naruto "Become a toy!," She cried a beam fired from her fingers struck him and his body warped becoming plastic, Sarah got onto her paws and put Yakumo onto her back before running past the Akaksuki who just realised tow of their members were unconscious,

Sarah stood on the Naruto toy throwing it to Yakumo who caught it as reality seemed to warp around her, Sarah barrelled through the woodlands "Stay here!," Konan ordered as she took flight believing enemies had found them,

Sarah continued running through the woodlands until a spasm of pain shot through Yakumo's head, And Sarah returned to her puppet form, Yakumo grabbed Sarah and Naruto, seeing a nearby building she began crawling to it as she got inside Konan set down outside it,

Yakumo pulled a door open and crawled inside, she pulled a button of her kimono and looked at the Naruto toy, "This isn't the way I planned for what happens next, but I know she won't look there," Yakumo said,

A second later Konan forced the door open and saw Yakumo throw the toy outside the window,

"You'll. . ." Yakumo breathed heavily, "never. . . . catch. . .him," she nearly moaned, Konan ran to the window seeing Naruto running away,

Konan said nothing before leaping out of the window in pursuit of her prey,

After a few seconds Yakumo smiled, "Sure you will," she moaned,

Jiraya came through the door, "Are you both all right?," he asked two women were behind him,

"Yeah we're fine," Yakumo breathed,

Jiraya looked around "where's Naruto?, he should be in here,"

Yakumo smiled "I turned him into a toy and shoved him inside my vagina," she moaned, The adults jaws dropped, "I have to remove him before Ido-chan's seal goes back on or he'll return to normal and explode my organs, but..." she covered her nether regions "he feels amazing inside me,"

"Yakumo, you have to take him out," Jiraya said,

"But this is the best feeling I've ever felt," she moaned,

Jiraya kneeled and gave her a grin "Is it?," he asked,

Yakumo turned away from him, "n-no, last night felt better,"

Jiraya nodded, "That my inexperienced kunoichi, Is because you enjoy it more when he pleasures you,"

"But he won't," she said "he's too sad to,"

"Oh I know, but I have a trick for that," Jiraya said,

"How?,"

"Take him out first before you explode,"

Yakumo nodded reaching a hand into her Kimono she slowly pulled Naruto out of her, passing out after she did with the seal on her head repairing itself.

Jiraya lifted both into his arms turning and walking out of the building Konan watched them as they left, having not to long ago realised the trick Yakumo had pulled, 'Interesting, but even as a kunoichi to go that far,' She thought, she blushed wondering if she could turn Pain into a toy would she do the same?, then the thoughts of how it would feel to do so made her breathing harder, she shook her head, 'anyway I need to get back to the others,'

Konan leaped through tree after tree finding the clearing the others were in,

Itachi was sitting upright and despite being knocked out by a paraplegic girl he seemed fine, "are you okay?," she asked he looked into her eyes, '...?' she shook her head,

"I'm fine he said standing up,"

"uhhg what happened?," Kuze asked sitting up,

"You are unbelievable, un," Deidara said

Konan shook her head, "Kuze, I understand what you witnessed was horrifying, believe me I have personally seen the horror of war, but if you pull that again I will personally take your severed arm to Leader-san and he'll figure out how to use your chains so we won't have to keep you around, understand me?,"

"uh," Kuze scratched his head,

"Ah forgive him Lady Konan," Itachi said, "my jutsu must have done something to his memory," Itachi kneeled before Kuze, "what do you remember last?," he asked,

Kuze grabbed his head, "uhh, I?, The blonde kid, you were beating him up Lady Konan and then-, no that's all I remember," he groaned, "what happened?,"

"He shouted his name Naruto Uzumaki," Sasori said,

"After that you went ballistic, we all had to switch focus to make sure you didn't kill him, and he escaped in the chaos." Konan stated

"Really?," Kuze asked looking into Itachi's eyes, '...', Kuze grabbed his head, "Sorry guys, but I couldn't control myself," Kuze said,

"Are your memories retuning?," Itachi asked offering him a hand up,

"Yeah, sorry Itachi-san," Kuze said,

Konan shook her head, "Maybe we should consider terminating him as an active agent?,"

"Maybe that is for the best," Kuze agreed, but Itachi stopped him,

"Despite his problems Kuze is too valuable to leave, besides we can't leave Kakazu without a partner for now," Itachi reasoned, "But since Kuze cant enter one of the main villages without getting enraged perhaps we should leave the decision with the leader," he said, "In the meantime Kisame and Kuze will switch, since I can use my sharingan to calm him down,"

Konan thought about it, "Fine, for now Itachi and Kuze will be partners and Kisame and Kakazu will be partners," she said, "try to rein him in," she said before taking flight again,

-meanwhile-

Jiraya had taken the group to a hotel and after paying for a room Tsunade had began healing Naruto leaning over his futon while Yakumo explained what had happened,

Yakumo had several arms and different puppets on them, the most common one was a muscular shirtless Naruto that had her on his back, "And then the three headed dragon flew at us and was like 'Waaaaa I gunna eat chu' but Naruto was all 'Haha! you can't eat me!' and then they wrestled for like three minuets when Naruto threw it back at the shark who made it and he was like 'oh noooo the invincible Naruto Uzumaki has beaten us again,' but then this demon lady came from the sky-," Yakumo said pulling a puppet version of Konan that wore a skimpy outfit,

"and she was all 'arara naru-kun fuck me to your death,' but Naruto was all 'ha using your body against me but I feel no lust, only hope' and then he emitted a bright light and it punched her in her kidney's kidneys, and she was beaten and this dumb guy was like 'have a bath Naruto' and slammed him into the entire ocean, but Naruto shrugged it off and was like 'ha how refreshing, and-"

"Okay Yakumo, and how much of that is what actually happened?," Jiraya asked,

Yakumo smiled "It's better then the truth!," she said,

Jiraya shook his head, "then take it from the top, but this time only tell us what actually happened,"

Yakumo sighed making her extra arms disappear, "Well Naruto was pushing me to the Casino to find Tsunade and then these guys with red cloaks jumped us, Naruto did a jutsu and knocked them down then he ran carrying me like a princess thought the streets, then this guy tried to chain us but Sarah caught it and dragged him away, and took these crows with him, then this flying paper lady flew above us and she blocked everywhere and led Naruto into a water dragon," she said, "but there was no time to dodge so he jumped into it back first curling around me, then the lady caught him in mid air asking how we knew you, then the chain guy dropped Naruto in a stream but he saved me from getting wet by taking his hands off,"

"then they did dramatic entrances and I thought the shark guys was the best cause it looked like he was gonna kill the other guys but Naruto said the crow guy, and then the blue haired flying lady fought him and then something weird happened where Naruto got covered in red stuff and then chains wrapped around it and then the red stuff vanished but then Naruto changed again this time he had red hair and purple eyes and he talked like girl and he fought off crow guy before falling over and then I turned him into a toy and Ido-chan punched him into a tree then Sarah ran but I couldn't hold Sarah's form, Naruto's and fight off Ido-chan's desires so Sarah became small again and then I saw a building and went inside, and I put Naruto inside me and turned a button into a toy and threw it out as the lady came in making it return to button shape as I made an illusion of Naruto running away which made the lady think I had thrown him out but the illusion disappeared after that, and then you guys found me," she said,

"and that's what actually happened?," Jiraya asked

"well I cut some stuff for time, but yes,"

Jiraya nodded, "Okay and do you remember what they look like?," Yakumo nodded and Jiraya held out a bingo book, "If you see any of them in there rip out their page," she nodded and opened it, and Jiraya walked over to Tsunade,

"Some brats you found this time Jiraya, what no future hokages this time?," Tsunade asked,

"that depends," Jiraya said, "on whether he want's the job or not," Jiraya said pointing to the unconscious Naruto who's hair had not changed back to blonde, "you know Part of the reason I'm here is to ask you to be Hokage,"

"Not a chance," Tsunade growled, "that village took everything from me, My lover, my brother, no way I'd ever return,"

"I figured you'd say that, It's actually the fourth reason I brought him,"

Tsunade clicked her tongue, "Yeah right, and after he convinces me to go back what then Jiraya?, is that the time you finally stick around?, ooh does Orochimaru come back too admitting he's wrong for being a crazy Psychopath?," she shook her head, "It's a nice fantasy, but it's still a fantasy," Tsunade took her hands off Naruto, "look I agreed to heal him and her, but I'm not coming back and that's final," Tsunade rolled Naruto back onto his back, "the skin will be a little tender but with the Kyubii healing him I expect him to be awake in about six minutes,"

Then Tsunade walked over to Yakumo "Her on the other hand, I have no idea, since she won't let me look at her," Tsunade shrugged "Have the red haired brat get me when he wakes up, and I'll try again," With that Tsunade and her apprentice left the room and Jiraya followed after them,

"Do you think he's okay?," Yakumo asked, "I'll bet he's fine," Sarah said, "besides that red looks sexy on him, don't ya think?," Yakumo nodded crawling over to him, "yeah, I think he looks," Yakumo licked her lips "delicious,"

OCTOPUS-END-OCTOPUS

Okay and we're done and as usual I have to say words the first being that I've started watching Naruto again and so far the first two episodes are damn good I forgot how in the first episode Naruto outwits two chunin, I think that's the reason most people make him secretly super intelligent cause in that episode alone he's smarter then he acts, something I also realised about cannon was that apparently all the teachers taught their students as much as Kakashi taught his, like in fanon it's normal to give the team Naruto joins some elemental jutsu and stuff, but if you remember that in cannon Ino and Sakura were equally strong during the chunin exams,

Just saying if I'd have written Naruto, I'd have it be the same Ino vs Sakura but have Ino wipe the floor with her and have Sakura learn a lesson, but you know I'm not that talented of a writer so,

and while we're on the topic of canon how is that Naruto was considered the worst of all genin yet he apparently outwits chunin while wearing bright colours in the middle of day, there is some obvious test rigging going on that everyone including Iruka and Hiruzen ignore, but if that is the case why are they ignoring it?, is it a plot by Danzo? and if they point it out is he like "surprise fuckers it's ya boi Danzo you fell for the old test score rigging trick and now I'm hokage," and if it was just to let teachers take out their aggression on a child that has only reacted to the stuff they did to him then I'm in full support of Sasuke's blow it up idea,

I'm starting to think Hiruzen did think of Naruto as a weapon in cannon, cause someone in his corner wouldn't think "oh I just discovered the school staff are bullying a child by lowering his grades which also makes it so other kids will bully him, It'll probably sort itself out," you right Hiruzen its not like there's a literal demon inside his gut that wants to manipulate him or something, one that would use society turning it's back on the boy to make him a weapon,

second this chapter was hard to start plans were made and then abandoned, but once I got into it, t'was was like nothing could stop me, but that doesn't mean I had this done in a day, and even now I've left stuff out, mostly because I need to change this story's summery, and what I mean by that is do you guys want sex scenes?,

Cause in a week while I'm binge watching Naruto to get to the film that I'm gonna have to write after the next chapter, I hope you'll all have decided and told me whether I should have them,

and Third This chapter is the first to go up while the story is under the crossover tag,

Yeah that's it, well that and I realised I don't have to write omake a if I don't want to, so I cut the unfinished omakes out and posted this chapter at 4:35 am, cause I am the hero?, the villain?, flash if I know

Regardless

Our hero

Awaaaaaaaaaaay

Gyahahahahahahaha