An encounter with a drunkard...
(-)
Kibutsuji Muzan always considered himself to be a rational individual. Regardless of setbacks, unforeseen circumstances, and things that randomly conspire to make his life more difficult, he never approaches a situation with anything less than absolute certainty of him leaving said situation in the same condition. Impulsive reactions lead to reckless behavior, which leads to judgmental errors, which leads to mistakes in one's actions, which eventually leads to death. It was a lesson he had to learn the hard way, as his impulsive decision to kill that doctor all those years ago is why he was still vulnerable to death by sunlight.
Yet in the face of his current 'guest', the rational side of his brains were struggling keep his proper decision making in check.
"Seriously~… Have ya evah thought 'bout putting up any decorations 'ere? This place is soooo dull." a slurred female voice remarked from behind. He did his best to ignore it, which turned out to be the wrong choice. And empty gourd flask whizzed past his head and smashed to pieces against the wall. "Ya lissin to me? It's rude ta ignore yer guests."
Closing his eyes to collect his thoughts, Muzan took a deep breath before responding. "Yes. I do recall you mentioning that prior to this." he replied in a calm voice that belied his internal frustrations. "I just fail to see the point of something as superfluous as flashy décor."
The guest turned to regard the rooms other occupant. "Ey' biwa-lady, you understand wha' ahm talking 'bout?"
The woman merely hummed in response.
"See? Even she gets it!"
"I do believe that was a grunt of dismissal."
The woman snorted. "Yer inability ta understand wimin is why you'll never get laid."
Oh, how he wanted to lash out at her, but that would be a monumental mistake. One does not simply attack the demon of Mount Ooe and expect to get off scot-free. As absurd as the idea sounded, Muzan was currently playing host to the Shuuten Douji. A genuine demon, -though legend states that the demon was male instead of female, but it was of no consequence, so he digressed- and arguably the most notorious of them all.
Despite what the title of 'demon' implies, Muzan is not of mystical origin, but rather a product of science. He was a human originally -a deathly ill one at that- and his 'demonhood' was the result of a drug administered to him by a doctor. The identification of demon was self-imposed as he no longer desired to be associated with that inferior race. Muzan is something above humanity, an existence that is far superior to those pitiful insects that he can crush like ants. Shuuten Douji however is a legitimate demonic entity that he had done investigations on in the past. Back when the legends of Shuuten Douji first began to profligate, Muzan had sent some of his underlings to look into the validity of said rumors. His line of thinking had been; if I can attain true immortality myself, then perhaps a true demon would be of help in erasing his weakness to sunlight. It was not meant to be however, as whenever he sent someone to ascend the mountain and make contact with the demons who called it home, they would wind up right back where they started. Some form of barrier had been erected to ward off intruders, and Muzan lacked any means of properly examining the barrier, let alone get through it. And any further avenues of investigation were abruptly cut-off when those demon slayers stormed the mountain to bring the demons reign of terror to an end.
But hundreds of years later Muzan was surprised by the unannounced arrival of Shuuten herself. The specifics and logistics behind the occurrence were of no concern to him for the time being, as he decided to prioritize the probing of the demon for information. Though it turned out she was quite a fickle woman and was more interested in drinking and reveling instead of being helpful. Oh, she assured him that if he managed to show her a good time that she would impart some of her knowledge unto him… Main problem was his underestimation of her standards. By the end of the first day she had gone through his entire stock of alcohol -not that it was a notable supply to begin with-, by the end of day two he had to reconfigure his base from the collateral damage that resulted from her hangover since he had nothing more to drink, the third day was even worse as Ibaraki Douji showed up -who was also female for some reason- and essentially picked up Shuuten's slack when it came to wanton destruction. Muzan had no need for food or drink that was not human flesh or blood, so he never really stocked up on it, thus he needed to constantly send his underlings out to pillage for whatever food and drink Shuuten fancied at the time. Turns out Shuuten preferred to eat 'actual' food instead of just humans, having scoffed in annoyance when he offered her a fresh corpse as sustenance. Then he wound up having to recall the Lower Moons just so the demon could have a proper party with other attendees -apparently drinking on your own is boring-, as anyone ranked lower in the hierarchy wouldn't be able to keep pace with Shuuten's chaos. And Muzan had no intention of bringing in any of the Upper Moons just so they could waste time having fun with Shuuten and Ibaraki.
So after extensive damage was inflicted upon his base and several of the Lower Moons had to literally pull themselves back together after the festivities, Muzan had been hoping that the woman would finally answer some of his questions. Good news? She did! Bad news? All her answers were drunken slurs that he struggled to decipher. That, and she'd often go off on tangents about completely unrelated topics. He didn't care about who won the race around Mount Ooe, he just wanted to know if she had a means to help him become immune to sunlight.
"Oi! Fugokuma, ya paying attention?"
And that damned name! She decided to combine the words fugokaku (fail) and akuma (demon) to essentially give him the title 'failed demon'.
"At least buy a girl another drink!"
Snapping his fingers, the biwa-woman strummed her instrument, causing the floor to shift and a small pedestal to rise with a bottle of sake on it.
"Is it really wise for you to be getting drunk again this soon?" he prodded, hoping she would take the hint.
"Ahm not getting' drunk, ahm staying drunk~!" she replied as she tore off the cap and proceeded to chug the contents. Pulling the lid away from her lips, Shuuten exhaled loudly in satisfaction. "Thatsh the good shtuff~! C'mon Muzy, join me for a drink! Ya gots to learn to live a little!"
Removing his hat and placing it on the table in front of him, Muzan ran a hand through his mess of curly hair and tried to collect his thoughts. "I will be more than willing to join you after I attain my immortality. Becoming immune to death would certainly be the most 'living' thing anyone could do."
"Hah? But thash so boooring~! What's the point ah life if ya cahn't die? Seems like a too bigga hassle ta put up with." was her slurred response.
Muzan quietly snorted at the demon's ignorance. "Immortality means being able to do whatever you want without fear of the ultimate consequence, death. I'll have all the time in the world to do whatever I want."
Shifting to look at the woman, he was confident that she might finally understand what he was trying to get at. However, he became confused at her reaction. Shuuten looked at him with an expression he couldn't quite identify at first. Despite her inebriated state, Shuuten's expression did not waver in the slightest. It took Muzan a few moments to finally figure out what her expression was…
Pity.
Rage began boiling to the surface of his mind with each passing second after having determined how the demon was viewing him. Then she said the words he never wanted to hear ever again. The words that were first spoken to him by that man.
"What is the value of a life to you?"
It was pure coincidence that she uttered the exact same question that he did. There was no possible way for her to have known, and yet that was enough to set Muzan off.
Shuuten ducked under the table that was suddenly sent flying towards her, which proceeded to smash to pieces against the wall.
"WHO ARE YOU TO ASK ME THAT?!" Muzan roared in anger as the veins on his forehead tensed up to the point they became visible. "You have no idea how long and hard I've worked towards this goal! True immortality has been just barely out of my reach for so long, and I will not have you mock me for it!"
The demon woman seemed to instantly sober up upon witnessing Muzan's outburst. "What point is there to living if you can't die? You don't feel fear, you don't have any risks, that rush of adrenaline from being able to survive a fight never occurs, and just the monotony of it all." she drawled on in annoyance. "I just find the concept of immortality to be terribly dull."
Muzan scoffed. "What would you know? You had been killed without ever having obtained it, yet you do not find it just the least bit enticing? To be immortal is the ultimate form of life!"
"To be immortal is a curse, forever living without worries or excitement. You lose the ability to care because nothing matters anymore." was her counter. "I think I now understand who you are at the core."
"You are little more than a foolish coward. Too afraid of death to the point of obsession, yet wholly ignorant of how pointless your struggles are."
Something snapped. The biwa player strummed a chord on her instrument and their surroundings began to shift. With the new arrangement a door was added, which soon opened to reveal another demon. The visage of a man with six eyes, the central pair having pupils with the kanji for 1 printed on them.
"Kokushibou, see to it that our guest is escorted off the premises. Feel free to utilize whatever force necessary." Muzan instructed as he turned away from the disapproving gaze of Shuuten.
"As you wish Muzan-sama." The newcomer answered as he drew his sword.
Shuuten chuckled in amusement. "You see, this only serves to prove my point. You're too afraid to risk your own safety, so you need to have your lackeys do the job for you."
Muzan greatly regretted having put up with her for so long.
