She misses him.
He will only be gone for a few days, but she got so used to seeing him every day, she swears time runs slower when he's not there.
She needs something to do, and so she decides to phone Tandy. There's also the fact she hasn't talked to her sister in almost a week, and she fears Tandy might send a rescue team if she doesn't hear from her soon.
"You know I imagine all sorts of terrible things when you don't call, right?"
"I'm sorry, Tandy."
Her sister sighs. "Sweetheart, you need to come home already. Everybody misses you. What are you doing there anyway?"
Rayna hasn't told her about Deacon yet, and she's not sure she wants to. Not... right away. She likes the idea he can be her secret for a while longer.
"I'm good here."
"You've been gone for weeks, I'm sure things have calmed down."
"It's not just that anymore, Tandy. I feel like I haven't taken a breath in years. There's always somewhere I need to be, there's always someone wanting something from me. There's so much coming at me all the time, it's just relentless. I need... a pause. I need time to think about what I want."
Tandy knows by now it's unlikely she'll change her sister's mind. "Alright. But I miss you, you know."
"I miss you too."
"I was serious, though, what are you doing there?"
"I sleep. I take walks. I write. A lot. There's something about this place that..." she starts, and she grins before she says, "inspires me."
—
Deacon has been back for less than an hour when he calls to invite her over to dinner. She's still smiling long after he's hung up the phone.
At seven that evening, she's standing in front of his cabin. She knocks, and he shouts that it's open, so she pushes the door and lets herself in. She finds him busy in the kitchen.
"It smells so good," she gushes, and she's not just being polite, she means it.
"I wasn't sure what to make, but then I recalled you mentioned you liked fish, right?"
"I do. I love fish."
He smiles. "Good."
She remembers she's holding a bottle of Chardonnay. "Oh, and then I guess it will work great with this," she says as she hands him the wine. "I know you insisted I didn't have to bring anything, but I felt bad showing up empty-handed. I just hope you're a wine kind of guy."
"That's really nice of you, but I'm more of a... no-alcohol kind of guy. I don't drink," he explains.
"Oh." She silently curses herself. "I'm sorry, I feel stupid now."
"Why? You couldn't know."
"I should have asked."
"I should have told you. It's just..."
He hesitates, so she reassures him. "You don't owe me any explanation."
"No, I think I do. You shared some very personal things with me, it's only fair I would tell you about this. I've had some... problems with alcohol in the past. And that's actually a nice way to put it. But I'm sober now, I've been for years." He points at the chalkboard hanging on his kitchen's wall. "2394 days to be exact."
Oh. Oh. Now it makes sense.
"Do you have someone helping you?"
"My sponsor lives in Bellefleur, that's where I attend AA meetings, too. I'm doing better these days, though, so I'm going less than I used to."
"Okay," she says. She grabs the bottle then and heads back for the door.
Deacon is caught off guard, so it's a couple of seconds before he runs after her. "No, wai—" he starts, but he finds her outside, pouring out the wine on the grass. He looks relieved before it turns to amused. "You could just have taken it back with you, you know."
"Nah." She smiles, leaves the empty bottle on the porch and goes back inside.
—
Rayna has never been this excited and this anxious about something at the same time.
She's still a little stunned she was the one who suggested it. "We should try out our songs at The Landslide," she'd told him the other night over dinner. He'd looked surprised at first, but he'd been quick to agree.
The idea of performing their songs in front of an audience is exhilarating, but it will also be the first time she'll step on a stage again since... the incident as Deacon had dubbed it. Granted there won't be more than a few dozens people there, but still.
It's Beth who offers to drive her to The Landslide. She sounds even more excited than Rayna to hear them sing. She feels she has a part in this happening since she was the one who suggested Rayna go see Deacon. She couldn't be prouder.
The bar is still mostly empty when they arrive. Rayna spots two stools and two mics on the stage, but neither Deacon nor his guitar are anywhere to be seen. She panics for a second. What if he decides to bail?
She jumps when he appears behind her, guitar case in hand. "Ready for this?" He's beaming.
"Can I still change my mind?" she asks, but she doesn't mean it. There's no backtracking now.
"No, I'm not letting you go anywhere. You're stuck here with me."
She's more than fine with that.
—
The stage isn't that small, and yet their knees keep touching the whole evening.
People have been pointing fingers at her and whispering before the set even began, but when Deacon officially introduces her, the audience goes wild. If she's being honest, she thought there was a 50/50 chance she would get booed, so it's a relief. They start with some of Deacon's songs that Rayna has learned for the occasion before they move to the three they wrote together.
The response is even better than what they'd hoped for. Something happens when she's on stage with Deacon, something she has never experienced before, something she feels she has no control over.
There's magic there.
When the three songs are over and the applause has died down, the room is quiet for a moment until someone in the bar shouts, "Already Gone!"
Rayna is used to it. It's her biggest hit, and the one that people request the most wherever she goes. She's about to tell the audience they're here tonight to perform Deacon's songs, not hers, when he starts to play. I take a breath and turn the key, I never guessed this would take all of me, he croons. She looks at him, asking without asking if he's serious, and he nods, grinning. "Y'all, I think Deacon knows my songs," she jokes. The room cheers. Deacon lets her take over the vocals and joins her again on the chorus.
Afterward, people come to chat with them while Rayna signs coasters and napkins. Deacon notices how comfortable she makes them feel when she talks to them, and he understands why so many people love her, beyond her music. It makes him even angrier at the media for what they've put her through lately. They've made her doubt her entire career.
Once most people have cleared out, it's Beth who comes to check if Rayna needs a ride back to the guest house. One look at Deacon, and Rayna knows she doesn't. She gets up from her chair, though, and hugs Beth. "Thank you," she says, "and I mean for all you've done since I arrived."
"You're welcome, honey."
Deacon picks up his guitar case then, and together, he and Rayna head out of the bar.
—
Rayna reckons she was wrong.
Writing with Deacon wasn't the easiest thing she's ever done.
Letting him drive her back to the cabin, letting him kiss her before they've even reached the front door, letting him take her hand and lead her to the bedroom, that's the easiest thing she's ever done.
Neither of them have been drinking tonight, but she feels dizzy. The moment his hands are on her, she knows she's never needed anything more in her life and never will again. He kisses her again, her cheek, her neck. His stubble brushes against her skin, and she's been wondering how it would feel since that first night she saw him play. When they peel each other's clothes off, there's no awkwardness there, no hesitation from either of them. They're in sync.
Everything since she's met Deacon has felt like it was meant to happen, and this is no different.
—
"I don't ever want to leave this bed," she says, later, when they're lying face to face, still naked and pressed against each other.
He grins. "Fine with me. However, I feel obligated to tell you there's still chocolate cake from the other night in the fridge."
"I take it back, we can momentarily leave this bed," she reconsiders, and he chuckles against her skin.
They get up, and among their discarded clothes he finds his flannel shirt and she finds his boxers, so they trade with a laugh and a kiss.
While he grabs two plates from the kitchen cupboard and gets the cake out of the fridge, she flips through his collection of vinyls. "What should it be?" she asks.
"Whatever you want, baby." He doesn't flinch, but she freezes for a second. Baby. That's new. She can tell she loves it already.
She takes a few albums off the shelf, discards them one by one until she finds what she's looking for. She puts the vinyl on the turntable, and when Lovin' Her Was Easier (Than Anything I'll Ever Do Again) starts to play, she smiles. She has listened to this song a thousand times, but she'd never really understood it until Deacon.
He brings the plates to the living room, puts them on the coffee table, and they nestle on his couch.
"You're okay?" he asks, and she's not sure if it's about her stepping on a stage again tonight, or about what happened after, but it doesn't matter. The way he looks at her, she's more than okay.
She forgets about the cake, climbs into his lap, her knees on either side of his legs. She smiles against his lips. "I don't ever want to leave you," she says, and after that, they're done talking.
—
TBC