Chapter Four: Childe's Play
The rest of the day hurtles by in a dizzying blur. By the time Zhongli's final lesson with the undertakers concludes, he has somewhat taken aback by how exhausted his body feels. He glances briefly at the clock and estimates that he has enough time for dinner and brief stop at his apartment for a change of clothes.
"Mr. Zhongli, might I have a word?" The Director calls as he prepares to leave for the day. He silently follows her towards her office and shuts the door behind them.
"Yes, Director Hu Tao?"
"Did you have a pleasant lunch with Herr Kreideprinz?" She asks a wide grin stretching her thin lips.
"It was quite nice, thank you," he returns formally.
"Good, I'm glad you both are…getting along so well." There is a knowing inflection in her tone and the Lord of Contracts briefly wonders if perhaps she had followed them that afternoon.
"Despite his aloof appearance, Mr. Albedo is quite affable and intelligent. A pleasant combination for engaging conversations."
"Mr. Zhongli, am I correct in assuming that you will be meeting Herr Kreideprinz later on tonight?"
"Perhaps," Zhongli returns reluctantly.
"Excellent," the petite prankster claps gleefully as she rummages through her desk briefly. "I have something I would like you to pass on to him."
"Very well," Zhongli sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I will do my best to pass it along at the opportune moment."
"I knew I could count on you Mr. Zhongli!" The Director squeals as the Consultant extends his hand expectantly.
She reveals a garish pamphlet advertising the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor's "Princely Discount".
Her smile falters as Zhongli retracts his hand.
"You do know that he's not actually a prince, don't you?" Zhongli asks quietly.
"Of course," Hu Tao chuckles. "I just prefer referring to him by his title since it actually suits him more than his real name."
Zhongli is about to say something in response when there is a loud knock on the door. The Director rises to open it and greets the tall Snezhnayan Harbinger with an excited squeal.
"Mr. Childe-Tartaglia what do you think of my latest pamphlet?!" She asks thrusting the flyer into his hands as he walks in.
"I already told you just call me Childe," the Eleventh Harbinger chuckles as he glances down at the flyer. Zhongli watches a confused grimace flit across the ginger-haired agent's face and feels a twinge of satisfaction as the younger man casts him a quick look.
"Well?" Hu Tao presses leaning forward expectantly.
"Well, this princely discount seems new," Tartaglia chuckles sheepishly scratching the back of his head. "What's uh—what inspired it?"
"Oh, well Herr Kreideprinz of course," the Director reveals excitedly. The Harbinger's confusion deepens as he chuckles nervously.
"He's an associate of Xingqui's—the Feiyun Commerce Guild Manager's youngest son," Zhongli elaborates.
"Ah, I see. Kreideprinz huh? Is he from Mondstadt or something?"
"Good eye Mr. Childe-Tartaglia!"
"Childe or Tartaglia's actually fine."
"According to Xingqui he's the Chief Alchemist for the Knights of Favonius and the Captain of its Investigation Squad."
"Is that so?" Childe smiles politely.
"Aiya, you don't seem very impressed by Herr Kreideprinz," Hu Tao observes crestfallen.
"Oh—er I mean I'm sure he's pretty great and all but I really don't know anything about alchemy, you see."
"Well, you could always learn," Zhongli notes eliciting an awkward chuckle from the blue-eyed harbinger.
"That's right Mr. Childe-Tartaglia," Hu Tao nods. "After all Mr. Zhongli's one of the smartest people in Teyvat and even he can't seem to get enough of Herr Kreideprinz."
Silence follows the petite prankster's words as the smile on the Eleventh Harbinger's face slowly but surely falters. Zhongli prepares to leave but is blocked by the Funeral Director who shoves her sparkling flyer into his tailcoat pocket.
"Come again?" Childe blinks slowly. "Who can't Mr. Zhongli get enough of?"
"Why Herr Kreideprinz of course," Hu Tao replies without looking up as she struggles to stuff as many folded flyers into his pockets as possible. "They've been hanging out every day now."
"It's only been two days," Zhongli clarifies in a strained voice as he struggles desperately to rebuff the persistent Funeral Director.
"Aiya, forgive me it just seemed like you both were quite familiar with each other this afternoon especially in light of the incident at the Bubu Pharmacy."
"Oho? What incident at the Bubu Pharmacy and what did they do this afternoon?"
Before she can respond the Funeral Director turns to give her Consultant a pointed look, a Cheshire grin teasing the corners of her lips, daring him to continue resisting. Intent on extricating himself from a rather awkward conversation, the God of Contracts assents, lifting his hands in resignation to allow the petite prankster unfettered access to his pockets.
"Well Mr. Zhongli, can I count on you to deliver these to Herr Kreideprinz tonight?" She asks beaming proudly as she straightens up to inspect her handiwork. The tall man straightens his tailcoat, smoothening out the creases she had created during their brief but fierce struggle.
"Yes, Director Hu Tao," Zhongli sighs pinching his nose once more. The Funeral Parlor Director claps her hands in excitement before shooing them out of her office as she prepares to conclude her affairs for the day.
An awkward silence fills the space between the Archon and the Harbinger as the God of Contracts feels the younger man's gaze trailing him.
"Well?" Childe says clearing his throat loudly as Zhongli begins to walk away. "Aren't you going to explain yourself?"
"I have nothing to explain," the God of War responds with a flippant shrug.
"You know I returned from Snezhnaya almost three months ago and this is the first time we've been in the same room since that day at the Northland Bank."
Unmoved, the Archon merely turns and continues on his way. Expecting the Eleventh Harbinger to follow him, he is pleasantly surprised when he exits the funeral parlor and notices him standing listlessly in the hallway within. Without preamble or hesitation, he closes the door behind him and continues into the night.
Albedo's younger sister is wide awake by the time the tea master's story ends and she stiffens visibly when she notices Zhongli watching them quietly from the shadows. Not daring to look away, the tiny child tugs earnestly at the slender youth's robes prompting him to scoop her into his arms. She squirms within his embrace and mutters something into his ear before pointing him out.
The Chief Alchemist turns to follow her finger and smiles when he meets the Lord of Contracts amber gaze. Zhongli's heart softens at the sight of that pure, beauteous smile. He pushes off from the wall and begins to approach them when movement from the corner of his eye draws his attention. He turns in time to find Childe striding towards the blond siblings and introducing himself with a deep bow.
The Archon's nostrils flare dangerously as he feels a rumble of protectiveness swelling from the pit of his stomach.
"Ah, it's nice to meet you young Klee," Childe says pleasantly as he extends his hand towards the wary child. She considers his hand briefly before glancing at Albedo and extending her hand.
"Ah Mr. Zhongli, Mr. Childe was just—"
"Leaving," Zhongli hisses sharply, cutting off the rest of Albedo's sentence. "Tartaglia was just leaving."
The Harbinger bristles visibly at being so openly addressed by his Harbinger call sign.
The soothing cadence of his voice snaps something inside Zhongli and he leans over to scoop the smaller man into a deep, searing kiss.
"That settles it," Albedo murmurs as the larger man slowly but surely pulls away. "I do remind you of someone."
"Alright, alright," Childe chuckles throwing his hands up. "I can tell when I'm not wanted."
"Funny, I was beginning to wonder about that," Mr. Zhongli chuckles unkindly crossing his arm.
"Hmm, Tartarus, Tartarus where has Klee heard that name before?" The child muses with a contemplative frown.
"Before I leave, I was wondering if I could have a word, Mr. Zhongli?"
When the Funeral Parlor Consultant doesn't answer, Albedo excuses himself and Klee before moving to rejoin the rest of the Guild Master's party. Zhongli watches until the blonds are out of earshot before turning to acknowledge the young Harbinger.
"You know if you were going to follow me here, I would have preferred settling this out back at the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor," Zhongli says not bothering to conceal the edge of annoyance in his voice.
"Who says I was following you, Morax?" Tartaglia sneers, a mischievous glint evident in his piercing blue eyes. "After speaking with Director Hu Tao, I was dying to meet Mondstadt's Kreideprinz."
"You are not to go near him, do you understand?"
"I really don't think that is up to you, Morax," the Harbinger taunts.
"This warning will be my first and last," the Archon declares firmly before moving to leave.
"So protective," Tartaglia chuckles. "I honestly can't say that I blame you. I must confess I was a little jealous to learn that someone else had caught your eye but now I see that I really should be flattered to have such a stunning successor. Perhaps I should invite him for lunch and give him tips on how to keep your attention."
"Defy me at your own peril."
"Oho? Is that a threat?" Childe cackles. "Honestly, I love seeing this side of you. It's so refreshing! Who knew taking your gnosis would get rid of the stick up your ass."
"Are you trying to provoke me?" Zhongli sighs.
"Yes," Tartaglia admits. "Is it working?"
"Come near him again and you will be sure to find out," the Lord of War returns bluntly before walking away.
"Oho! That was a threat," the Harbinger calls after him.
The seething Archon pays him no mind, instead descending the stairs at a brisk jog. He joins the crowd of passers-by and slows to a relaxed pace as he searches for any sign of the Chief Alchemist. Finding no sign of him, Zhongli retreats to his apartment to call it a night.
Sleep eludes him the entire night as he replays his conversation with the Eleventh Harbinger. While he wanted no further involvement with Childe, he knew how easily the young Fatui agent developed obsessions. The barely contained disdain for the blond alchemist was all the God of Contracts needed to know the Harbinger's latest target.
I can't have Childe hurting him on my account. The Lord of War fumes. The sooner I distance myself from him the better.
As the first hints of dawn stain the inky night sky, he rises from his bed and slowly gets dressed. He stops at Third-Round Knockout for a quick breakfast before heading over to the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. Along the way, he stops by the gates leading into the Commerce Guild Manager's manor and converses briefly with the guards before handing them a letter addressed to the Chief Alchemist. He arrives at the funeral parlor and confers with the morning undertaker regarding a cleansing ritual they are to be holding that afternoon.
"Mr. Zhongli," a young undertaker squeaks meekly as she approaches his workstation.
It is mid-afternoon now and he is inspecting a batch of cor lapis a clerk had recently brought out from storage.
"Mhm?" He hums without looking up.
"Y-you have a visitor, sir."
Repressing a deep sigh, the God of Contracts lowers the gem and turns to give the clerk a bemused frown.
"Who is it?"
"Xingqui. I believe he's the son of the Feiyun Commerce Guild Manager."
"We're preparing for a cleansing ceremony Mai Li," Zhongli sighs. "See what he wants and take a message." The clerk hesitates, watching him quietly as if about to say something before thinking better of it and walking away.
He hears her speaking quietly to the Commerce Guild scion as he pretends to return his attention to the gem in his hand. The clerk returns some time later with a simple envelope which she begins to place on Zhongli's desk at the other end of the room.
"I'll have that, thank you," he says, his deep voice carrying easily across the room. The clerk hastily bows and hands the letter over to him before slipping out to return to her duties.