Prologue Pt. 4:

Yet again, not even half a second had passed by until the woman who greeted me at the stadium door earlier sprinted toward me at a somehow more hurried pace. The sight of such a feat was actually incredible. How is no one else visibly shocked by how fast this woman's running in her outfit?

When she reached me, she was pleading, "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry I didn't get to you earlier! I got busy daydreaming a-a-a-and missed you passing by!"

"Hey, it's ok. Seriously, I'm good," I replied. The woman dressed vividly with her long, pink hair, patterned purple knee-length dress, and sleek black high heels. She was a lot to look at, but she was also a lot to hear. Poetically, she's probably the only person in the world who could make that outfit make sense.

She declared, "Alright, then! I'm Hatsu Michiko, the Ultimate Advertiser. What's your name?"

I responded, "My name's Osada Mutsohito, or the Ultimate Logician."

"That's so cool! That sounds like such an amazing talent!"

"Thanks, but I don't know if it's that much better than the other students here."

"You're right! I should leave that judgement up to you!"

Now I really saw why Hatsu could fit the Ultimate Advertiser role. It was like she got thrills just by speaking to other people. I then asked, "This might sound kind of random, but how are you able to run so fast with what you've got on?"

She answered, "Lots of will and determination, I think."

"Hmm. That makes sense. Well, I'm gonna get around to the other students now, so I'll catch up with you later."

"Sweet! Let me know if you need anything else!"

Her answer to that question wasn't as concrete as I hoped for such a feat, but it at least sounded honest. Although most of her responses were really simple, sometimes to the point of vagueness, I couldn't help but appreciate her genuineness.

I thought about visiting the next person who spoke up when I arrived, but I shuddered remembering that this was the woman who insulted Hatsu earlier. I skipped her for now and headed towards the scary-looking man with the black-and-white face paint. Technically he insulted me, but I let it slide because it wasn't anything I hadn't heard before. The more I paid attention to his outfit, however, the more daunting his figure was. He had long, wavy hair and sported a black robe that draped his whole body. He also wore a stole with a symbol of a pentagram on it.

My brain didn't even have time to instinctively turn away when he summoned me, "What do we have ourselves here? One freshly ripe for the sacrifice." He spoke in an unexpectedly clear voice, although its properness didn't sound quite as real as he may believe it does.

He continued, "I, Mizushima Ekiken, the Ultimate Satanic Priest, but please know me by Mizu. I will soon test if you are truly worthy to serve Him."

"Uhh…" I had no idea of what to make of the situation. This is an Ultimate student, so I don't know whether to pass this off as corniness or whether to take him seriously. I had to say something, "I'm Osada Mutsohito, the Ultimate Logician. I don't know if I'll join, but I'm at least interested?" I said with a visible wince in my face.

He started to notice my anxiety rising, "Don't be worried, child of Satan. He will make your transition into eternity painless and will ensure your righteousness with Him." While his approach was likely in good faith, his hand gestures and choice of words were unsettling, so I left the conversation a little early.

"That sounds… fun. I'll catch you later." He didn't respond further as I slinked past him.

I then ran into the other guy with face paint. Like Mizu, I could immediately tell what his get-up was signaling. The matching red shoes and face paint on his nose, the green and purple-striped overalls with the blue undershirt, and a short, jolly appearance sold an obvious self-representation. His poofy purple hair was even more ridiculous-looking than mine.

He spoke as I approached him, "Hey! I got a joke for you!"

Curious, I responded, "Ok, hit me with it."

"What do people most often eat noodles out of?"

I groaned, totally expecting the answer, "Yes?"

"Hunger!"

Surprised, I laughed and said, "Oh, you actually got me there."

"I figured so, for I am Morihei Chomei, the Ultimate Clown! What you witnessed there was a subversion of expectations. It's not a perfect method, but it can go a long way where it's needed in contemporary comedy. See, you thought I was going to-"

"Mock my appearance, yes, yes."

"No, no, not that. You thought I was going to make a simple observation, but I allowed the situation to contain another theme."

"Huh. Oh, and my names Osada Mutsohito, or the Ultimate Logician. It seems like you're skillful enough about the nature of comedy to earn you another Ultimate Title."

"I'm not quite there yet. Clowning is much more than comedy, but comedy plays a huge part in its entertainment value. It's by far the most complex field of any clowning components. Now, ready for another one? What family of organisms seem so spread out and lonely when they're secretly united?"

I confidently answered, "Humans!"

"Noooope! It's mushrooms!" He then busted out laughing for what seemed like the next minute as my ego was officially shattered. The moment I let my guard down, he finally directed a joke at me. It's like he read my mind for the entire conversation, and I felt ashamed.

I was then approached by the woman in the glittery spandex one piece from earlier. She had neck-length brown hair and was clearly in good athletic shape. A notable part about her outfit was a lack of shoes. At least with where I've been in this building, shoes seemed to be a must have, so she's already daring with that move.

"Ah, he hit ya with the ol' mindscrew, didn't he?" she asked in a bewildering southern U.S. accent.

Not knowing what to answer with, I basically didn't answer at all, "Yeah, I-I guess he did."

"He got the brains, Big Man got the brawn, but I got the flex. The name's Fukutsuchi Okimi, or just Suchi, and I'm the Ultimate Acrobat. The three of us will make one helluva tag team o'er here."

"That's cool. My name's Osada Mutsohito, or the Ultimate Logician. So, what happens if I tried to join the team?"

For the next 30 seconds, Suchi looked around at nearly every inch of my body, probably trying to see if I was worth anything for whatever they were up to. She then leapt up from a squatting position and declared, "Ha! Nice try there, buddy!"

Her bluntness caught me flatfooted, "Huh?"

"I'm just messing, pal! Ya should come join our rally for some shenanigans sometime. However, doing so requires hard work! And lots of practice!"

"I'll think about it. By the way, before I go, may I ask why you chose this outfit?"

"Oh, the feetsies or the sparkles? Cuz I can answer both questions. I consider myself a bit of a free spirit, on the outside and inside. Plus, I don't mind feeling naked around strangers, I just wear clothes cuz I'd get charged for indecency if I didn't."

Her comparatively overwhelming self-confidence became too much to bear, "Alright, well that answers that, so I'll go see the other students now. Thanks, bye!"