Hello dear readers! Thank you so much for staying with me on this journey. I never did have a chance to answer my reviews from the last chapter, which I do always try to do, but please know that I do appreciate you all so much! I hope you enjoy the latest installment of this unconventional journey!
~Lizzy
On a rather chilly November morning, Gilbert dressed and readied himself for a football game that he had no interest in playing. He would have skipped it altogether if that hadn't meant he would be letting his team down in the process. It was one of those times in his life he would lament some of his natural talent. A lesser player would hardly be missed. But the more he thought about it, what would he do in absence of a football game? He had plenty to study, especially if he were making a true play for the Cooper Prize in Sciences. But he had no patience for it today and his room seemed to feel smaller with every passing minute. He needed the fresh air. So when he finished getting ready, he slipped out the back door unnoticed and walked to the field.
It had been a difficult few weeks. Weeks in which everything for Gilbert was turned so dramatically on its head that he could not make sense of any of it. The first thing to rock him was Anne's note. Short and perfunctory, asking him, in as many words this time, for space. Space! Meaning she didn't want to see him. As he walked on, he could recall the words of a note he'd read dozens of times with perfect clarity.
Dear Gilbert, it had read. "You'll have to forgive this note and the manner of it's delivery. I am sorry to say I find myself rather busy this term. In addition to professor Hartley's research project, I have just volunteered to chair this year's Convocation committee. With both commitments, I'll have to curtail our study sessions until further notice and I likely won't be available after classes for a while. I hope you understand. And if we are lucky, this little bit of space will have the added benefit of staving of the pesky gossip.
Regards, Anne"
It was odd enough that Anne would send a note to convey such tidings but even stranger still she would find this measure necessary at all. They both had demands on their time, for sure, but Gilbert was hardly of the mind to let those concerns make his closest friendships suffer. After the first reading, Gilbert was mildly concerned. After arriving at Patty's Place the next three days in a row for more of an explanation and being told Anne was not home each day, his mild concern became more acute. Especially when on the third day Priscilla and Phil had seemingly disagreed about whether or not Anne was even home and spent a good several moments looking oddly at one another before Phil ushered him off without so much as an invite in for tea.
The next day he had waited for Anne after her history class but, true to her word, she was nowhere to be found. He waited again the next day after her English class, but again no Anne.
He finally saw her the following Friday at Patty's Place where her demeanor was as it ever was, friendly and engaging. And though Gilbert tried mightily to get her alone again to talk, that opportunity never materialized. Phil clung to her like a mother and if it wasn't Phil it was one of the other Patty's Place occupants who thwarted his efforts.
It was clear. Gilbert was, for a reason he could not fathom, being rather expertly shunned.
And that's how it had been now for three weeks. Three weeks of spotting Anne across the lawn as she scurried away to another engagement. Three weeks of incessant chatter at Patty's Place that only served to take his mild concern to acute aggravation. Gilbert wasn't sure what emotion drove his aggravation except to admit to himself that he missed her. It was like there was a piece of him missing when he couldn't turn to her and share a joke or take a long ramble when the stress of their studies had them at their wits end. He realized in her absence how much he had come to depend upon her. Not just for her friendship, but for the peace she had always brought to his life at every turn. It was a peace he had always felt in her company. Like she was a beacon in a storm. When Gilbert saw Anne, he always felt at home wherever he was. That was her unique gift and Gilbert was practically lost to be without. Perhaps, he could admit now, that he had taken it quite for granted.
On all of this he thought as he walked vigorously across the quad and toward the football field. Thinking about the sound of Anne's light laughter and how much he missed hearing it, that though was fairly shattered when he heard a voice that made the hair on his arms stand up.
"Gilbert!" He stopped dead in tracks, suppressed a groan, and turned around to see Christine Stuart practically running towards him. Of course! Could the woman not give him one moment's worth of peace?
Adding to the list of Gilbert's manifest annoyances over the past three weeks, Christine Stuart ranked rather highly. It wasn't that he disliked her. In fact, he liked her very much. She was a sweet girl and he truly did enjoy her company. But in addition to insinuating herself into just about every part of Gilbert's existence, she prattled on needlessly about anything and everything under the sun. It was as if Charlie Sloane, Ruby Gillis, and Josie Pye all got together to all put the most annoying parts of themselves together, though with none of Josie's malice or Charlie's condescension.
Perhaps had he been in the right frame of mind over the past few weeks, he might have been a bit less judgmental of her flaws. But as it was, he was beyond the ability to continue to make allowances for her simply because she was Ronald's sister.
But in the next moment, he felt bad for even admitting those thoughts to himself. It wasn't Christine's fault he was having a bad few weeks. So he turned, straightened himself up like a gentleman, and said, "Hi Christine."
Christine, now slightly breathless, reached him and latched on to his arm immediately. "I thought I'd never catch you!" Christine breathed out through a smile.
"And yet here you are," Gilbert retorted blandly as a thought flashed through his mind that stunned him for a moment. He looked down at Christine's arm over his and he suddenly realized just how different it felt. To be touched by Christine made him feel, well, nothing. Not that it should as she was well spoken for. But it was that feeling he missed. That feeling he always had when Anne would put her arm through his in the same way. Sometimes, if the weather was sufficiently cold, he might even bring his other hand up to cover hers to keep it warm, letting his fingers gently stroke hers in a gesture that seemed to warm them both. This, he noted with disappointment as he looked sideways at Christine, was nothing like the feel of Anne's touch. In fact the contrast was so stark that Gilbert wondered how he'd never realized it before now. Touching Christine made him feel... obligated. Touching Anne, however, was altogether different indeed. That feeling of…. What was it, exactly? Comfort of dear friend? Pride of being the escort of someone as intriguing as Anne? Maybe a flash desire at the touch of a beautiful woman? That thought brought a blush to his cheeks and he unnecessarily cleared his throat as he put those thoughts out of his mind.
"I didn't know you were planning on attending the game today," Gilbert said.
"Oh, I wouldn't miss it!"
"Are none of the ladies at your boarding house planning to attend?" Gilbert asked, attempting to hide the veiled question of why in blazes she had to hunt him down to escort her.
"A few of them, yes," was the reply that failed to satisfy his curiosity. Apparently his company was preferable.
They walked on for several minutes, Christine chatting and Gilbert offering only perfunctory responses. His head was elsewhere. Thinking of someone else. On thoughts he was having a difficult time controlling. On feelings that seemed to be spiraling a bit out of control. And why in blazes did he keep looking down at his and Christine's joined arms and recoil at it, almost wishing to throw her off his person!
When they reached the field, they necessarily separated as Christine joined some friends, presumably the same ones who weren't good enough company to walk with, and Gilbert joined his team. Once they were on the field, Gilbert scanned the crowd. He saw the ladies from Patty's Place and his heart soared, that was until he noted Anne's conspicuous absence. Apparently she was also too busy to attend his game. He sighed heavily as the referee blew the whistle.
That game lasted a long time, too long by Gilbert's estimation. Rain was about to threaten and Gilbert was glad of it. It would put paid to any post game celebrations. He was in no mood. As much as he earlier wanted out of his boarding house, now he was eager to return, a sure sign of a confused and frustrated man.
Gilbert looked around for Christine, hoping he might sneak away undetected, and couldn't help but let out a chuckle as she stood talking to several of his teammates in a small group. She certainly liked the attention. This was a fact he noted that might not go over with a certain fiance, but that was far from his problem. As the spectators dispersed, Gilbert ran over to ladies from Patty's Place, who were in conversation together.
"Hello ladies," Gilbert offered.
Priscilla was the first to greet him. "Hi Gilbert. Great game! I didn't think you gents would pull it out there for a few minutes."
Gilbert smiled, "Thank you. We like to keep the fans on their toes now, don't we?"
"You certainly do," Priscilla nodded.
"Hello Gilbert," Phil greeted him coldly. That was another thing to vex him over the past weeks. Philippa Gordon had gone from good-natured chum to something else entirely, almost as if she was angry with him, though for what he could not fathom.
"Hi Phil. It is nice to see you."
"Are you headed to a post game celebration with your friend?" Phil asked.
Gilbert looked at her strangely as he saw her line of sight land on Christine. "Um, no, I'm headed back to the boarding house. It looks like rain any minute now."
"How disappointing," Phil replied in a tone of barely thinly veiled sarcasm. It was the first time Gilbert realized that Phil was not Christine Stuart's biggest fan. He resented that a bit. Other than Stella, the ladies of Patty's Place had done little to make Christine feel welcome on campus. But that was a thought he dismissed in favor of asking after Anne.
"Anne wasn't of the mind for football today?"
"No," replied Phil. "She favored a walk in the park instead."
"Yes, she was feeling rather not herself today," added Stella absently.
"She is not sick I hope," Gilbert replied.
"Oh no, nothing like that," said Stella. "Just a bit tired I guess."
"Yes," Phil chimed in, "she's been quite busy this term"
"Yes, I know that," Gilbert replied. "I have barely seen her of late."
At this Phil looked back at Christine and said, "Well I trust you are filling the void nicely with Miss Stuart."
"Phil!" Stella admonished. "Excuse her, Gil. Phil doesn't mean to pry, do you Phil?"
"Oh, of course not," Phil assured in exaggerated tones. "I wouldn't dream of prying into any one's love life now would I?"
As puzzled as he was by her tone and general irritation, Gilbert saw fit to correct any assumptions. He'd heard the gossip. His and Christine's names were now linked as a couple. It had bothered him, which was strange considering it had never bothered him when the same rumors went around about him and Anne. "Well, by all means, pry as much as you'd like, but you are bound for particular disappointment in that quarter."
Phil eyed him quizzically, "What do you mean?"
"Phil, if any of you had taken the time to get to know Christine at all, you'd know she's engaged to a fellow back in Halifax and quite happy to be so. I only escort her around because she is Ronald's sister and he is a good friend who asked for a favor."
"Oh," Phil replied, momentarily bereft of other words.
"She's a sweet girl but I assure you I have no other intentions towards her than friendship."
"Well that is a surprise," replied Stella. "We all thought for sure you two were on the verge of a courtship.
"Not at all," Gilbert replied, noting to himself that Phil had gone uncharacteristically quiet. "Do any of you know when Anne will be around? I would like to come see her today if possible."
Phil then found her voice rather quickly. "Anne is busy today."
"But I thought you just said she was walking in the park," Gilbert retorted.
"Well, yes but you know how busy she's been this term," Phil reiterated, finding no better sudden explanation.
"Yes, it seems to be all I hear about lately," Gilbert said, now irritated. "If it's not Professor Hartley's research project it's the Convocation Committee."
"Oh," replied Stella, "Anne is not working on that research project anymore. It has been cancelled for weeks."
"Stella, no!" Phil replied quickly and quietly, but it was too late.
"What?" Gilbert managed when he was able to process the words.
"Gilbert!" Phil chimed in with a warning tone but he cut her off.
"Stella, what do you mean the project has been cancelled? When?" Gilbert asked, hoping the feeling in the pit of his stomach wasn't a bad premonition.
"Oh, back in September. Something about the funding. Anne was sorry to lose the opportunity.
"Since September," Gilbert replied in disbelief.
"Yes, as far as I know."
Then Gilbert looked to Phil, who had gone pale and would not meet his eyes, and everything came together in an instant. "You knew this whole time didn't you? You knew she's purposely been avoiding me, haven't you?"
"Gilbert, it's not what you think!" Phil retorted.
"Oh, really? And just what is it that I think? That my good friend has been lying to me for weeks! First it was Stella's philosophy class and now it's some fake research project!" He looked directly at Phil and said slowly, sure to enunciate every word, "What is going on?"
"Gilbert," Phil said, as Stella and Priscilla looked on in abject confusion, "Calm down."
"Do not tell me to calm down!" Gilbert seethed.
At this point Phil saw fit to take Gilbert by the arm and lead him away from the group to a private space on the other side of a nearby row of hedges.
When they were assured of privacy, Phil turned to Gilbert, her eyes ablaze. "Gilbert, are you trying to make a scene?"
"Do not try to placate me, Phil. Just please tell me what in the world is going on, please. Why is Anne lying to me? I know that you know."
Phil let go of Gilbert's arm and let out a heavy sigh. "Gil, I can't tell you."
"Phil, please," Gilbert pleaded, this time in a low voice.
"All I can say is Anne has her reasons and you should respect them."
Gilbert nearly exploded at this. "Respect them! Is that a joke? She's been lying to me for weeks!" Then in a show of concern, he asked earnestly and with no little fear, "Is she angry with me? Did I do something wrong?"
Phil shook her head. "Gilbert, please, if you care about Anne you will let this go."
Gilbert let out a bitter laugh. "That might be easy for you to say but I want answers. And since I don't seem to be getting anywhere with you, I guess I will have to go directly to the source." He turned to walk away but Phil grabbed his arm and held him back.
"Gilbert, please. You will only make things worse for her. And for yourself."
Gilbert turned back to Phil. "How can I make things worse, Phil? Anne is purposefully avoiding me and has been lying about it for weeks. You won't tell me why and you just expect me to let this go as though it is nothing? You can not really expect me to do that."
At this, Phil let out a resigned sigh and let go of his arm. "No, I guess I can't stop you. And maybe it isn't my place to even try."
"Thank you."
"But, Gilbert, all i will say is please tread carefully. Anne has her reasons and you may find out blissful ignorance is preferable."
Gilbert shook his head. "No. Even the worst would be better than this."
Phil then seemed to study Gilbert for a moment. She looked him up and down, noting his clenched fist and the hard set of his jaw.
"Before you go, just please clarify one thing," Phil suddenly said.
"What is it?"
"Christine Stuart."
"What about her?" Gilbert asked impatiently.
"There is really nothing between you two?" Phil asked.
Gilbert shrugged. "Phil, I already told you, she is engaged to be married."
"Some say I am too," Phil retorted. "That does not always mean what it is supposed to mean."
"Phil the woman, as far as I can tell, is in love with her fiance. And even if she wasn't, I have no interest in her beyond friendship."
Phil seemed to consider that response for several moments, clearly formulating her next words with care.
"Have you asked yourself why that is, Gilbert?"
Gilbert rolled his eyes and turned again to walk away. "I don't have time for this nonsense, Phil. I have to find Anne."
But once again, Phil grabbed his arm to stop him. "Gilbert wait! I promise this is the last thing I will say and I will let you leave."
He turned again towards Phil and said, "Please, whatever it is make it fast."
Phil took a steadying breath and bravely said, "Before you go chasing after Anne for answers, I want you to take a moment and think on one thing. Why is it that a man with your good looks, charisma, charm, and smarts hasn't found himself interested in any lady at Redmond beyond friendship? Why hasn't one woman on this campus turned your head?"
Gilbert stared at her blankly, wondering if she had lost her mind. "What does any of this have to do with Anne?"
"Everything, Gilbert," Phil shook her head. "You are just too dense to see it. Maybe if you spent less time putting Anne up on a pedestal, you'd finally see her for the woman she is. Then you would see what is right in front of you." And with that, Phil walked away, leaving a confused Gilbert looking after her.
He stood stock still for a few moments as he attempted to piece together that conversation. Contrary to Phil's belief, Gilbert was not dense, as Ronald Stuart had also once suggested in regards to Anne, nor could he pretend to misunderstand what Phil was trying to tell him. But none of it made any sense and only filled him with more questions. There was apparently a good deal he was missing and it was high time Anne answered for it.
Gilbert turned and stalked off just as the rain started, unaware and equally unconcerned that he would be showing up to confront Anne looking rather wild. The only thing he could think of on the cold, windy walk to the park was that Anne was lying to him. Though, if he were honest with himself, Ronald and Phil's voices echoed in his head more than one time as he wondered just what they both thought he was too dense to see as a small and very secret part of his heart began to beat wildly with anticipation.
Anne was having an incomparably better afternoon than Gilbert and for reasons aplenty. Though she had gotten caught briefly in the rain when her umbrella failed her, the handsome stranger now standing next to her under the safety of the pavilion had, as any true gentleman would, offered his umbrella. Roy Gardner was handsome to say the least and the more Anne and he talked, the more Anne was...intrigued. He was well spoken, polite, had a knack for paying pretty compliments, and he had dark mysterious eyes and deep melodious voice.
In short, Anne was captivated. At least captivated enough to wish to know him more. Perhaps this would be the second step on the road to putting Gilbert Blythe out of her heart forever. The first had come with her note. Successful as it had been, it was still maddeningly vexing to have the very thing she wanted come at the price it did.
She missed Gilbert. So badly that her heart ached for him. So badly that those first days she was nearly moved to tears when she knew he was at the front door but stubbornly refused to admit she was home to avoid him. She missed his voice. She missed his touch. She missed the way the lines of his brow furrowed when he was trying to work out a problem. Or the slight quirk of his lips when Anne would regale him of a story about Davy from a letter she's just received. She missed just about everything about him, but nothing more than his eyes, always such wide open windows to his very soul.
She shuddered a bit just to think about it.
"Are you cold?" Her companion asked in response to her shiver. "May I offer you my jacket?"
Anne blushed, not for the offer, but for the direction of her thoughts as she hoped she was not as transparent as she felt at that moment. "No, thank you. I am quite warm enough. It seems the rain is slowing down now."
"Yes," Roy replied. "I am sure the sun will be peaking out any minute now, though I will be sad for it."
"Oh, and why is that?" Anne asked.
Roy smiled, "Well, Anne, I can not say I have ever enjoyed a rain storm more than I have today. I'll be sad for the loss of your company when it is over."
Anne blushed again, flattered to have inspired the sentiment, even if she was unsure if she welcomed it. But before she could respond, she looked beyond Roy to see a figure advancing toward the pavilion through the now light rain. Her heart raced when she saw, walking up to her in a football jersey, with wet hair, grass stains, and looking more handsome than she had ever seen him, was Gilbert.
Roy followed her line of sight and they watched wordlessly as Gilbert approached the pavilion steps only to stop short when he saw Anne was not alone.
He stared at Anne for a moment and she had no trouble seeing he was angry. She let out a sigh and when she saw he was about to speak, she cut him off.
"Gilbert, whatever are you doing here on a day like this?"
"I could ask you the same thing, Anne," Gilbert retorted with a sideways glance at Roy. "I've been looking all over the park for you. I would have thought you'd left when the rain started."
"Oh. well I simply went for a walk in the park and got caught in a bit of rain. Mr. Gardner," she said gesturing to Roy, "was kind enough to lend me his umbrella when mine turned inside out. We've been riding out the rain together."
At this, Roy saw fit to introduce himself, "Hello there, I am Royal Gardner. And you, I think, are Gilbert Blythe."
Gilbert replied more out of good breeding rather than an earnest care for who this stranger was. "Yes. Nice to meet you Royal."
"Please, call me Roy. I think we have the same English class this term. With Professor Sanderson?"
"Yes. I thought you looked familiar," Gilbert replied trying to hide his annoyance and forced small talk.
Anne simply stood and let the introduction happen as she tried to think of anything more uncomfortable as Roy yammered on about the English Professor for a few moments while Gilbert mostly ignored him in favor of staring at Anne who was doing her best to look anywhere else.
Finally, Gilbert's good breeding met the limits of his patience and he said, "Roy, I don't mean to be rude, but I need to have a word with Anne."
"Gilbert, now is hardly the time," Anne said.
But Gilbert would not be sidetracked. "Oh no, Anne I think this is the perfect time." And then he stepped forward towards her and whispered lowly, "This insanity ends today, Anne."
Anne's heart was beating so rapidly she thought she might faint for a moment. There was nothing to be done about it. He had caught her squarely and she could hardly count on the kindness of a literal stranger to save her now. But perhaps Gilbert was right. Perhaps it was time for this untenable insanity to end once and for all.
She turned to Roy only to see a look of confused concern on his face. "Roy, would you mind excusing us. Gilbert is an old friend and we have some things to discuss."
"I see," Roy replied slowly, looking between both parties. "If you are sure?"
Anne nodded. "It is alright, I assure you. I appreciate your generosity and your stimulating conversation."
Roy nodded and then he picked up his hat and put it on his head, handed his umbrella to Anne and said, "For your walk home."
"Oh no, please, I think it will stop raining soon," Anne said as she attempted to hand it back to him.
But Roy would not take it. "I insist. Besides, it will give me a reason to see you again," he said with a smile. Then he took a step towards Anne and said, "It's been a pleasure to meet you, Anne."
And with that, he gave a short nod towards Gilbert and walked off into the rain. Anne looked after him only for a moment, his umbrella heavy in her hand, before she put it down on the railing, squared her shoulders, and looked deep into the eyes of Gilbert Blythe.
Her incomparably better afternoon went up in smoke as Gilbert walked several steps toward her once again, a fiery passion in his eyes, and said in a low voice mixed with anger and concern, "There is nowhere to run now, Anne. You and I are going to talk, and you are going to tell me everything."
He left no room for argument, and not for a second did Anne intend to make one. It was clear he knew something and instead of making up instant excuses, Anne let out a deep sigh, suppressed a feeling of growing dread, and said in a shaky voice, "Alright, Gil. Let's talk."