[Chapter 3: A Rhetorical Question]
Velvet sighed as she gazed at the Soccer Ball she was holding. "Day 1 of your new start and you kill half a dozen people over a ball...Nice, Velvet..." She somberly said to herself. Velvet's moment of reflection was cut short by the sound of a loud explosion off in the distance, she turned to see a column of smoke along with a shower of fireworks rising in the distance. "Oh no! My drugs supplier! Now where am I going to get more drugs?! Oh well, at least I have plenty stashed away, I hope nobody trying to find drugs conveniently overhears me and tries to follow me back to my stash!" A voice cried out near Velvet. Velvet turned to the source of the voice to see a man in a tacky purple-striped jacket that must have been made with the pelt of a Gay Zebra, and gold-lined aviators. The man, sensing a presence near him, turned to face Velvet. "Oh crap..." the man uttered out before he turned and broke into a sprint. Velvet immediately gave chase, sprinting through the alleys and jumping over obstacles as she kept hot on the man's tail. Velvet was always an athletic girl, even before the incident, and her quest for revenge kept her in peak physical condition. She was a fast runner, but somehow this guy managed to stay just ahead of her despite being nowhere near as good of shape as she was in. "Stop chasing me you crazy bitch! Go back to America or something!" the man cried out as he pulled a white bag out of his pocket and shoved a handful of it into his nose. The moment he did he began to run even faster.
"HA! You'll never catch up with me!-SHIT!" No sooner did the man finish taunting Velvet did he slam face first into a wall. Velvet had him cornered now. "There's nowhere for you to run now, tell me where your stash is and I won't have to ruin that jacket of yours." Velvet said, extending her blade. "I die before I tell you lady! All I have to give you is this FREE SAMPLE!" The man reached into the bag and threw a handful of the powder into Velvet's face, temporarily blinding her. The man seized the opportunity to charge through her and dart out of the alley. "Bastard!" Velvet cried out in rage as she regained her footing and resumed the chase. It wasn't long before the sound of a door slamming caught her attention, and noticed a shack with a ridiculous décor that matched the man's fashion sense. "Well, at least he's predictable..." Velvet said to herself and kicked down the door.
"OH SHIT! SHE FOUND ME! HOW?!" The man screamed out as he frantically opened the cupboard and dropped two slices of bread onto a plate. "What the hell are you doing?!" Velvet cried out as the man dumped a bag of cocaine onto one of the pieces of bread and slammed the other piece on top of it, making a cocaine sandwich. "YUMMY!" The man screamed as he jammed the sandwich into his mouth, caking his face in cocaine. Velvet was aghast at the sight she just witnessed. "What in the actual f-" Velvet was cut off by the man slamming a remote to turn on the sound system, which promptly began blasting 'Push It To The Limit' as he pulled out a small knife caked in more cocaine. "YOU MESS WITH WRONG MAN, GRINGA! I GOING TO CUT YOU UP NOW!" The man yelled out as he charged Velvet. Velvet cast aside her shock at the absurdity of the situation she landed herself in and readied herself. The man laughed maniacally as he swung at Velvet. Velvet skillfully dodged the onslaught of slashes and retaliated as soon as she saw an opening, but the cokehead was fast, dodging the moment she swung, stabbed, or slashed at him. Velvet's frustration grew as the man laughed mockingly. "You have to do better than that, chica!" Velvet lost her composure and charged at the man, the man quickly fell into a strange stance and delivered a powerful palm-strike that sent her flying, and she crashed into a computer hooked up to a large monitor, which promptly turned on. "AHAHAHA, RONALDHINO SOCCER!" The speakers boomed out. Velvet recognized the voice, that was one of the artifacts she needed to get home. This guy was all that was standing between her and leaving this cursed realm, she just needed to figure out how to beat him.
Before Velvet could get back up, however, the door crashed down, and heavily armed police officers stormed through the doorway and crashed through the windows, training their guns onto both her and the cokehead. An officer that appeared to be of a higher rank and a man in a suit entered shortly afterwards. "Hey, what the hell?! I pay up this month!" The man shouted to the police sergeant. "You pay for us to overlook the drugs, but we cannot overlook what you have done now, my friend" The sergeant gestured to the man in the suit. "Mr. Coca, I am a representative for Nintendo Ltd.™, it has recently come to our attention that you have been using...An emulator..." The entirety of the police squad collectively gasped at the man's words. "Drugs are one thing, Mr. Coca, but this...You have gone too far this time! Too far!" The sergeant yelled at the cokehead. "Mr. Coca, by emulating our games on the computer, do you have any idea how much money you are costing this company? Think of the hard working men and women that slaved to make these consoles and games for you, and you thank them by stealing! Have you no shame?" The man in the suit chastised the man. "But wait, both the games and the consoles aren't being made any more! You don't sell them through any first party distributors, the only way to buy these things these days is through second-hand means, but you don't make any money off of those! How am I stealing sales from something you aren't selling anymore?!" The suited man's face turned red at Mr. Coca's rebuttal. "SERGEANT! EXECUTE THAT MAN! EXECUTE HIM NOW!" The suited man's voice cracked as he screamed at the sergeant while pointing to Mr. Coca.
The entire squad immediately opened fire on the man, .308 rounds from the team's FAL rifles tore through the man's tacky, ostentatious clothing as the officers fired until their guns were empty, but Mr. Coca appeared to be unfazed by the hailstorm of gunfire. Suddenly, Mr. Coca broke out into a laugh as white smoke began emitting from his wounds. "ahahahahaha...AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" He continued to laugh as the smoke plumed out of every orifice, his laughter turned into a spectral echo as the smoke engulfed his body, and he vanished into the cloud of smoke, leaving behind nothing but a pile of white powder. Velvet was dumbstruck by the scene that unfolded in front of her. "...What the hell just happened?..." Velvet finally uttered out, all of the attention turned to her. "Who the hell is she?" "Who cares, just arrest her, we'll blame her for everything instead." The Officers exchanged amongst each other. "Now wait just a damned min-" Velvet rose to her feet but was cut off by a set of prongs piercing her torso, followed by a loud clicking noise as paralyzing pain engulfed her body. Velvet cried out profane gibberish as she collapsed to the floor, was quickly cuffed, and had a black bag thrown over her head. "Not again..." Velvet grumbled under her breath as she was dragged outside and thrown into the back of a police van.
When Velvet regained consciousness, she was greeted by a familiar voice. "Tooooiiiiitelz in the hooouuusseee, Toooooioootose. Eeeeeeveryoooone loveeeesss - them toiteeellzzz." Velvet opened her eyes, she was bound to a chair in some kind of dark interrogation room, the Dark Turtle sat across from her with a menacing grin on his face. "Velvet, long time no see!" The turtle said with malicious excitement. "You...How did you get here?" Velvet weakly asked, trying to come to her senses. "After youz gave my hind a whooping, those katz told me they was takin' me to the Katz Pajames, but next thing I knew, I was tumblin' down to here...Brazil! I thought my goose was cooked for sure, but then some nice police officaz found me and gave me a job! They catch poor people and feed them to me, best job I eva had!" The turtle replied boastfully. "I'm not poor! I have plenty of Gald, I just left it back home!" Velvet replied defensively. "That's what they all say! I know the truth, Velvet! Who'dya think swiped your money pouch when you vanished at the throne? You're broke Velvet! Broke!" The turtle taunted Velvet. "I made that money back, damn it! You see, this big metal monster attacked Loegres and I took it down by myself! The Bloodwings gave me lots of money for saving their bar from being blown up! I'm not broke!" Velvet snarled out. "Even if that was true, Gald ain't the currency here, buddy! You could have all the Galds in the woyld and you'd still be broke!" The turtle pointed at Velvet and began to sing "Broke! Broke! You're poor! You can't afford stuff! Lalalalalala!" Velvet growled in frustration as the turtle continued to taunt her.
"But, anyhoo, I ain't gonna eat ya, at least not yet, Velvet. I'm gonna watch ya squirm a bit first." The turtle excitedly declared as he pulled out a laptop from his shell. "What is that thing?" Velvet curiously inquired. "You'll find out in a second." The turtle replied as he opened up the Laptop. "Ya know Velvet, I'd been followin' ya for quite a bit back in the day, and man, you sure loved to threaten to eat people, didn't ya? I bet ya think you sound sooo cool and scary doing it, dontcha?" The turtle mockingly asked. "So what if I do?" Velvet replied, trying to brush him off. "Well, Velvet, after I got here, I discovered a little something that's gonna make ya see yourself in a whole different light." The turtle answered as he logged into DeviantArt. "And what would that be?" Velvet asked. "I'm gonna introduce you..." The turtle turned the laptop screen to face Velvet. "To Vore."
Velvet's screams resonated throughout the police station as she was forced to look at the horrifying images. Tears welled up in her eyes as an overbearing sense of shame and regret washed over her, was this how people really saw her when she threatened to eat people? Velvet tried to collect herself. "Y-You'll have to do better than that! You won't be able to break me so easily!" Velvet snarled out as she tried to purge the cursed images from her brain. "Oh don't worry, we's just gettin' stahted!" The turtle menacingly declared. "You're always going on with that bad attitude, constantly threatening people, going off on how dark and tortured you are and how the world's a crappy place. I bet most of the reason ya keep doin' it is because ya think it sounds cool, dontcha? Well, there's plenty'a people out there like ya Velvet that think it does, though they're all like 12!" The turtle broke out into laugher as he began to show her various edgy Sonic OC's such as Coldsteel the Hedgehog. "N-No! I'm not letting you get inside my head!" Velvet cried out, trying her absolute best to keep her composure.
"Hey Velvet, why don't we play Edgy OC Bingo?" The turtle pulled up a bingo card with various descriptions of what comprises an edgy OC. "Let's see here, Oh! Red and black! That's practically a free space!" The turtle began enthusiastically pointing to the squares. "Please don't do this..." Velvet whispered out. "Tragic backstory! Cannibalistic! Focuses on blood! Is some kind of Demon!" The turtle continued. "Please stop..." Velvet continued to plead. "Manipulates others, let's see, Self Harm? Ya did cut yourself that one time, right? Yeah, screw it, I'll count that. Bingo!" The turtle cried out. "You're an edgy OC Velvet! You're just like Coldsteel The Hedgehog!" The turtle laughed as he pointed to Velvet. Tears streamed down Velvet's face as she glued her eyes to the floor in shame. "No...It can't be true!...Is this...How I really look? How I sound?" Velvet broke down as she was overcome with embarrassment.
"But there's more, Velvet! Let me show you something called...Fanfiction..." The turtle resumed typing with a malicious, menacing expression on his face.