A/N: Now that Fleurmione Week 2021.1 is done, I'm back on this fic.
CW/TW: implied reference to abortion. Very very brief but I did feel Hermione would look at all of her options
Chapter 4 – Of someone that you love too much
Hermione took another sip of her butterbeer as she sat in the Three Broomsticks and continued to reminisce about how her life changed when she discovered she was pregnant the previous summer. She could laugh about it now but at the time she was scared shitless. There had been no warning. Her irregular menstrual cycle doing its best to screw with her, as well as a complete lack of morning sickness.
:
While the doctor ran through facts, her dear mother nodding and asking questions, all Hermione could do was sit in denial. They'd used protection. Hermione swore she and Seb had used a condom every time. She wanted to smack herself for not using a contraceptive spell. But aside from casting glamours to hide her scars, back then she had been trying to avoid magic as much as possible.
Not having knowledge of the date of her last period made determining the gestational age complicated, but she told the doctor her last partner was in June and it seemed to match up with what they could see through the ultrasound; that she was around eleven weeks along in her pregnancy which put her due date in the middle of March the following year.
Hermione did take a few days to consider her options. She would be nineteen when the baby was born and being a nineteen-year-old single mother had not even been on the radar when she imagined the challenges she would face in her lifetime. Furthermore, she was doing a piss poor job of making decisions that permanently impacted her life so how could she be expected to do any better with another innocent life dependent on her for survival? But in the end, Hermione decided to keep the baby. Having no delusion that it would be easy, or that she could do better than how her parents raised her, her heart overflowed with a love that clung fiercely to the wondrous possibilities now before her. There was no second-guessing her choice here. She wanted this. Hermione thought about Seb and what she would tell him but decided to wait. She didn't even know his last name but she had no doubt she could find him when she was ready.
At the next session with Mara, she apologized for not having done that week's journal homework and dropped the pregnancy bombshell. Then she asked if she could borrow any advanced magical textbooks the therapist might have access to. The pregnancy amplified her desire to learn but she also knew there was a strong likelihood her child would have magic just like her. She started wondering if she should take her NEWTs and began studying for them just in case. Realistically, given her current skill-set, she was more likely to find gainful employment in the wizarding world and she wanted to provide for her child. It was also important to her that she develop a way to balance the magical and muggle parts of her life, living in one without leaving the other behind, so she took her time to think over what she really wanted.
She kept going to therapy, though they decided to drop the frequency to once per week since she no longer felt like she was drowning and grasping for lifelines. Hermione shared her fears about motherhood and her doubts about being able to successfully take on these new responsibilities. But she also shared her hopes, the happy feelings that filled her chest at the thought of a wild-haired toddler calling her 'mummy'. Mara listened, gave her more homework, and made her feel like she was moving in the right direction. In addition to her therapist's support, her parents also guided and shared their own learning experiences about becoming new parents. Little by little, she moved forward.
A few days after her birthday, Mara presented a wand box that McGonagall had sent. The anxiety such a thing would've normally caused didn't happen. Instead, Hermione calmly read the note from Garrick Ollivander.
10 September 1998
Miss Granger,
I hope this note finds you well. I do not know if you are in need of a new wand, but I had a feeling that a clean slate would be preferred. In experimenting with other woods and wand cores, I came to the conclusion that you are still better suited to the vine and dragonheart string that made up your first wand. The design is similar but the length is now nine and one half inches.
If it is not to your satisfaction, you have only to return it, no questions asked. Best wishes to you, Miss Granger.
G. Ollivander
The old wandmaker had good timing. She'd destroyed Bellatrix Lestrange's wand before leaving for Australia, preferring her own wand, but it never felt right to her after Lestrange had used it. Hermione opened the wand box and examined this new wand, ignoring how Mara watched her. Picking it up, she felt warmth shoot up her arm, as well as a familiarity she thought she'd never feel again. The relief was overwhelming and she didn't know she'd been crying until Mara waved a tissue in front of her face.
Hermione went home and promptly broke and burned her childhood wand, feeling like a weight had lifted from her.
The nightmares were still there, and sudden loud sounds would still set her on edge, but those things became less frequent and less jarring as she was better able to assess her surroundings and safety after waking. Instead of being lost in the images and memories her mind had conjured up, she awoke knowing right away it wasn't real. Sleeping better also meant she was able to better focus on other coping strategies she was learning in therapy. It turned out she carried a lot of resentment inside, not just towards the enemies she'd encountered in the war but towards the adults who should've done a better job protecting and preparing them. Mara pushed hard once that thread started unraveling. Eventually Hermione recognized she carried some resentment towards Harry and Ronald, too. It was her choice to stay friends with Harry, her choice to stick with him and protect him in the war, but at the same time, she wished the mantle hadn't fallen to her. It twisted her with guilt because she knew that Harry hadn't wanted those responsibilities either. It wasn't his fault. Nevertheless, in her darker moments, when all she could focus on was how the wizarding world had constantly thrust her into danger, she wished she hadn't befriended the boys at all.
And then there was her deeper guilt. The thing she guarded behind impenetrable walls, the one that had sickened her and made her feel so ashamed it was one of the reasons why she didn't want to return to England. Fleur had been a large part of that decision but there had been this, too. Despite her best efforts to hide from it, like so many of the other things bubbling to the surface it slipped out of her mouth in an innocuous session with Mara as if it had been part of a grocery list.
She had been about to break.
When she was being tortured by Bellatrix Lestrange, she would have eventually revealed everything the dark witch wanted to know.
For all of their studies and defense training, nothing could have prepared her for the terror of being at the mercy of a woman so deranged and sadistic that it sometimes seemed she didn't care at all about the answers to her questions. They were incidental to her goal of making Hermione scream. And nothing could have prepared Hermione for the Cruciatus Curse. Getting carved in the arm and elsewhere had hurt and demeaned her, but it had actually been a welcome reprieve from the searing, unbearable pain of the torture curse. Probably the most difficult thing to swallow was that it had only been a little over a half hour of torture at the most. Just forty minutes and Hermione knew in her gut that she wouldn't last. Dobby had saved more than their lives that day.
It had not been easy to face that truth. She could have heard it a million times from Harry that anyone would have broken, that even trained aurors like the Longbottoms lost their minds after being tortured like that. She was smart enough to know this. Intellectually, she did know this. But it didn't matter. The knowledge of her weakness had deeply unsettled her and made her feel so very unworthy to be Harry's friend, or anyone's friend for that matter. Or someone's mate.
Mara stayed patient and never judged her, even when Hermione spent their appointments berating herself. Hermione gradually reached a tentative acceptance. She still had a long way to go but it was a start.
The pesky little fact about being a Veela's mate had yet to be revealed to Mara but Hermione couldn't help but dwell on it on her own after facing her guilt. Was this the reason why she was too afraid to confront Fleur on her lack of communication over their bond? She had asked herself that many times during her drunken episodes in Australia. Why hadn't she said anything? She had never been shy about yelling at someone that had wronged or angered her before. What kept her silent when she needed answers from Fleur? Had her insecurities over her unworthiness gotten the better of her? Had they convinced her that there was no point in fighting for Fleur when she felt she deserved to be rejected? Hermione eventually had to bring up these questions about Fleur with Mara, but their conversations were already heavy enough, so she kept putting it off.
During these weeks of breakthroughs and progress, Hermione's pregnancy appeared to be moving along nicely, too. While she was hitting gestational milestones early on, it was around sixteen weeks when the obstetrician noticed the baby seemed small. Hermione was told to eat more and to schedule more frequent follow-up appointments. She declined more invasive tests but researched all she could on fetal development. The fluttering movements in her abdomen astonished her, and further motivated her to do everything she could to ensure her child's health. The doctor told her she was having a daughter at her twenty-week appointment and Hermione cried. She and her parents tossed around names, and her dad Greg worked on converting the spare room next to Hermione's into a nursery. She loved how involved her parents were. And she began drafting a letter to Seb to let him know. Never satisfied with how she phrased it, she kept throwing the letters away but she knew eventually she would have to send one.
They all kept busy and she was glad to have her parents; their relationship was as solid as it ever was. While she devoured pregnancy books, breastfeeding books, and child-rearing books, her mother knit a blanket and helped shop for newborn necessities. Greg loved documenting everything with his camera and had also purchased a camcorder to record short interviews with Hermione over how everything was going. She talked about food cravings (peanut butter spread on pickles), and sanitized her recollections of the vivid dreams she kept having. Many were fantastical situations at school and the two of them laughed as she recounted them, but her father would not have wanted to hear about her sex dreams. The ones featuring Fleur were especially detailed. The books had warned her about pregnancy dreams and hormones playing havoc with her libido but experiencing it was something else altogether.
It was at her twenty-four-week appointment that Hermione's doctor seemed at a loss as to why the size of the baby looked more like she was at eighteen weeks; he made an offhand remark about the gestational age being wrong and questioned the timing of when she was with the father of her baby. Hermione was about to rip her doctor a new one when a feeling tingled over her skin. A thought she never once considered scratched at the back of her mind.
Panicking, she realized if her hunch was correct then she wouldn't be twenty-four weeks along in her pregnancy, she would be thirty. But then why would the baby look like she was only eighteen weeks?
Hermione needed to talk with Mara.
After several minutes of silent pacing, Hermione sat down. She hunched over and put her hands to her face. As with all of their previous meetings, Mara waited for Hermione to speak first.
"How much do you know about Veela?" asked Hermione finally, bringing her hands down to her knees. She lifted her eyes to the older witch.
"Not a whole lot, they're a secretive bunch. I had a friend who was part Veela back at St. Mungo's. He told me some things. Matriarchal. There are men, and they have magic and enjoy full benefits of clan membership, but leadership and inheritance tend to go through the female line, as does the Veela thrall. Did you know it's thanks to Veela and those few other beings who have magical bond mates that the wizarding world recognizes same-sex marriages? Oh, there had been tacit recognition of those relationships for several centuries, especially amongst those with wealth and political power, but for those living with their human mates outside the protection of a clan… well. A Veela bond mate is essentially a spouse in their eyes and when the wizarding world was buckling under the pressures of the first wizarding war, they leveraged centuries-old alliances and promises of support in order to officially remove the insult of not having their spouses legally recognized as such, and demanded it be done internationally for all magical kind."
Mara paused, no doubt noticing how Hermione blanched at the last sentence. "Anyway, took a few years to get most countries on board but legal recognition came in the fifties. If only the no-maj world could catch up in that respect."
"I… didn't know that," responded Hermione quietly.
"Well, it doesn't mean the wizarding world is a banner for social acceptance for all, you know those pureblooded bigots. My son Omar is gay and happily out so it's something I have a personal interest in."
Hermione glanced at the wall which was adorned with a few pictures of Mara's family. Her favorite was the one with a smiling teenage boy wrapping his arms around the shoulders of his parents. They'd sometimes touch on Mara's family in prior sessions but other than knowing he would be starting his fifth year at Ilvermorny this fall, Hermione didn't want to pry.
"Your turn, Hermione. Why the question about Veela?"
She took a deep breath and said, "I am the bonded mate of one. She's from the Delacour clan." Angry tears filled Hermione's eyes. She wiped them away. She hadn't been ready to talk about this yet, she had wanted more time.
As usual, Mara's next question cut to the chase.
"Is she the reason you moved to Canada?"
"Partly," admitted Hermione. "I mean… yes. We've already talked so much about my guilt in facing my friends, but yes. Yes, she's the reason."
Hermione proceeded to give a cursory description of her history with Fleur, quickly mentioning their dalliance at Hogwarts and skipping ahead to their fraught but passionate encounter which finally sealed their bond but also resulted in Fleur's rejection, or the one she knew had been coming.
"And now I'm worried. Something's different about the pregnancy. The baby is not developing at the pace the doctor expects. So, can you… I mean, is there a way to know…?"
Mara hummed, nodding her head slightly. "You think Fleur is the parent instead of Seb. From what I know about Veela, that requires a sealed bond, Veela magic, and intent… from both parents. Do you recall that happening?"
"No!" blurted Hermione. "There was no potion, no incantation, I certainly never… I did think about it… I did imagine and wish for a family with her while we were… erm, you know."
The therapist said, "Well, Veela are one of the rare beings with magic capable of enabling two people with female reproductive organs to get one another pregnant. I just don't know the specifics."
"But then why would she… did she do this on purpose? Get me pregnant only to leave me?" Hermione's mind raced, anger suddenly rising up in her chest at such a selfish act.
"I don't know, Hermione. And maybe she doesn't even know. That's a possibility, too. Like I said, their magic and culture are well-hidden. I only knew about the marriage recognition because that's legal history. In general, wizarding documentation on Veela is largely based on hearsay and rumor. However, first things first. Stand up."
Hermione frowned but did as Mara instructed and watched as the older woman took out her wand.
"A witch came into St. Mungo's after a bus accident in a muggle area. She was heavily pregnant and had a broken leg. We easily healed the leg but when we tried to check the baby, none of our diagnostic spells worked. It was like there was a protective ward on the baby. The witch was conscious and told us that her wife was a Veela. The mediwitch in charge immediately understood and kicked everyone out of the room, except for me, and sent a patronus. She turned to me and said Veela were extremely territorial and protective of their children. While our healing magic would work normally on Veela of all ages, it was generally not allowed for non-Veela to treat Veela children except for medical emergencies or other special circumstances. And not even permission would allow us to examine Veela pregnancies conceived by magic. Only Veela magic would work."
"And the baby… was it okay?"
"Oh yes," Mara replied, slightly rolling her eyes at the memory. "My friend, the Veela healer we had on call, apparated thanks to the patronus, and the wife arrived shortly after. Baby was fine and the witch was whisked away by the healer to another place to be monitored by her wife's clan."
"What are you going to do?" asked Hermione, eyeing Mara's wand.
Mara's eyes held some measure of glee, as if she had thought of something clever. "I'm going to check for when conception occurred."
"But if this is Fleur's baby, that spell won't w–"
"Won't work, yes, very true," interrupted Mara.
It took Hermione a second but then she chuckled. She watched Mara wave her wand over her abdomen. Mara then bit her lip and nodded.
"Didn't work," the therapist said in a cheerful voice.
Hermione felt her heartrate pick up. She had her answer.
"One more check, just to be thorough," muttered Mara before waving her wand again. "I am checking for types of magic present."
The younger witch couldn't see what Mara saw but the woman's eyes did not look surprised.
"Veela magic, centered around your abdomen."
The two women stared at one another, Hermione in shock and Mara trying to exude a soothing calm. They both sat down.
It was several minutes later before Hermione had sufficiently cleared her head. Then she nodded for Mara to continue.
"Now, a muggle doctor can still treat you. The protective Veela magic only wards against non-Veela magic; it can't stop an ultrasound or hands checking the baby's position, things of that nature. And labor and delivery are the same. What you would have to lie about is when you conceived since a full-term Veela pregnancy is fifty weeks, if I remember what my friend and the mediwitch told me correctly."
"Fifty?!" exclaimed Hermione.
"Yes. And development in the first half of gestational development is slow, which explains what your doctor was observing. There are these intermittent growth spurts and then a sort of plateau in between as the internal organs catch up. The second half is when things proceed at a steadier pace."
"Can you do it?" Hermione asked.
Mara scoffed. "I haven't done any midwifery in years, Hermione."
"And I can't go to a magical hospital like Derwent. They'll contact a Veela."
The therapist's eyes widened in understanding. "And they might contact the nearest clan for you to deliver the baby with them."
"Please, Mara. I'm not ready for others to know. The Delacours are an important clan. If this gets out, and what you say is true about how protective they are, they'll come for me."
"I don't even have an ultrasound machine," argued the flustered therapist.
"Your husband is a muggle pediatrician. He should be able to get you access to one, right?"
There was a long silence as Mara thought it over.
"We're already seeing each other once per week."
"Yes," said Hermione eagerly.
"So we'll just add an extra twenty minutes for check-up, b–"
"Perfect," Hermione cut in.
"But… if there are any issues I will have to bring in a Veela healer. Do you understand?"
"Yes, absolutely," smiled Hermione, happy that she had gotten her way, but now saddled with a whole slew of new worries about her daughter's needs and future. And Fleur. What the hell was she going to tell Fleur?
"Now then. I normally wait for clients to raise these issues themselves, but I would be remiss if I didn't make a recommendation given this new information. You have just discovered another life-changing tie to your mate. You came to Canada, not planning on ever seeing her again, and now you are having her child. You will have choices to make, and unlike the stresses and fears that may have influenced your decisions before the war ended, it is important that you not let them influence your choices now. I can't force you to talk about her but it is clear she is a large part of your life and she will continue to be. It would be to everyone's benefit that you face your issues with her instead of ignoring them as you have been. Your feelings, the other things that happened between you, whatever it is that is making you angry with her and with yourself."
Hermione swallowed and nodded. She was glad Mara wasn't going to make her delve into it today but for her daughter's sake, she knew she couldn't hold back. She had to talk about the years of being left in the dark about her connection to Fleur and how that felt. Her hurt that the girl never discussed it with her even after they bonded. Her reckless decision to seal the bond in the first place, knowing this heartbreak was a possibility. All of it.
Revealing this new aspect of her daughter's parentage to her parents was awkward to say the least. She hadn't gotten around to coming out to them about her sexuality yet. So not only did Hermione have to reveal her daughter had another mother, she had to explain she was magically bonded to this woman, and that if this woman registered their bonding with her clan, they would be considered married. But they didn't have to worry about that because the woman was already married to someone else. Her parents winced at that part but thankfully didn't yell at her. Hermione stuck to the facts, reluctant to discuss how much it hurt to not be with the woman she loved, the woman that was her perfect match in every way. It was a lot to take in, but her parents assured her that they supported Hermione in who she was no matter what, and that while magical bonds and pregnancies might be hard to wrap their heads around now, they would get there eventually.
The more challenging conversation was telling them that she was thinking of going back to England. Random thoughts like this had been popping up in her head for weeks but it was now something to seriously consider given the change in her situation. Hermione told Greg and Sarah they didn't have to follow her. The move from Australia to Canada had been hard, not to mention they just went through the difficulty of establishing a new dental practice, it didn't seem fair to expect them to uproot themselves again so soon. But her parents revealed they had been wanting to return ever since they'd gotten their memories back. Canada was fine but they missed their friends and family, and they'd only come because she needed them. Now that they felt she was in a healthier place, they'd been talking to each other about giving up their fake identities and going home. Hermione felt terrible she'd made them move here in the first place, but their feelings and support helped clear up her own mixed feelings. Going back was looking more and more like the right choice.
At least there were no more concerns about not meeting human gestational milestones. Given that she knew the exact date of conception, her new due date for a fifty-week full-term pregnancy was on the fourteenth of April. Mara discreetly searched for any additional information on in-utero Veela development. Hermione didn't fully understand why her daughter, who would be one-eighth Veela, would go the whole fifty weeks but Mara explained that it was due to the Veela magic involved, which could only be used between a bonded pair. It didn't matter what fraction Veela Fleur was. If the Veela magic worked, then the growth of the fetus followed the development of a full Veela pregnancy.
After a particularly realistic dream with Fleur, the two of them in domestic bliss, Hermione took her dad's camcorder and began to record short messages to Fleur about their baby. She had the ones her dad was making, and she didn't really know why she wanted more personalized messages for Fleur, or maybe she did and didn't want to admit it. Either way, she found that expressing herself this way helped her process what happened between them. Plus, if Fleur did choose to be part of their child's life, then maybe she would appreciate seeing the parts she missed.
Hermione quit her part-time job at the bookstore and doubled her efforts on her magical studies during this time, with occasional tutoring by Mara. After some hand-wringing, Hermione reached out to Minerva McGonagall to inquire about NEWTs. Given that her daughter was expected to be born in mid-April, and Hermione didn't feel comfortable being away for a long period of time, she needed to tell McGonagall about the baby so that they could make accommodations. They worked out a system where she would be able to use an international floo connection with the Three Broomsticks. She would come in for a few days and stay at the Three Broomsticks while she was there, take half of her exams, then floo back home for a couple of days. Then she would go back and take the rest.
As her due date approached, Hermione asked McGonagall if she thought the head of the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures was a trustworthy sort. She wanted to be able to properly provide for her daughter but also make things better for those with creature heritage. With this new purpose in mind, she made her decision. It was time to stop running. Dealing with the trauma of the war could be faced head-on back home. And she didn't want the pain of seeing Fleur with someone else to derail her from the goals she'd put in front of herself so long ago, not anymore. Now that she knew for sure she was going back, Hermione went back and forth over whether to send Fleur an owl but she was still hurt over what happened, and a little afraid of the woman's reaction to her pregnancy. There was no predicting what the Frenchwoman would say so rather than deal with another rejection when she was trying to keep her stress levels low in the last weeks of her pregnancy, she vowed to tell her about the baby after the birth, and after she finished her last NEWT.
Getting the go-ahead from Minerva, Hermione sent an owl to the department head and was immediately offered a position. Hermione made it clear she wanted to pass her NEWTs before working there and she was assured there would be no problems. All she had to do was let them know when she could start.
In the end, even though Mara had confirmed Fleur was the other parent, Hermione still occasionally doubted it. It wasn't until her daughter was born after eighteen hours of labor two weeks early on the afternoon of March twenty-seventh that she looked at her baby's face, saw Fleur, and all doubt flew out the window.
Hermione wept with joy and relief as Mara placed the naked wriggly newborn into her arms. Knowing what her daughter needed, she pulled down her sweat-soaked tank-top, arranged the baby in the way Mara had showed her, and watched as her child instinctively latched onto her breast.
Her parents kissed her and left the room. Mara followed them, telling her to call out if she needed anything. They wouldn't be far but Hermione was glad to have a few minutes to herself, getting to know this new little person that she and Fleur had made.
She softly caressed the top of her head, noting the tufts of golden-brown hair and the deep blue eyes. While it was technically possible for a newborn's eye color to change after a few months, Hermione knew these would stay blue. Part of her hoped they would be as blue as Fleur's. Her daughter didn't nurse long before falling asleep, no doubt just as exhausted as she was from the sudden change in their world.
The new mother whispered to her daughter, "I promise to provide you a good life. Your mum and I, I mean, your maman and I don't really get on but I promise I'll do my best to give her an opportunity to share in your life because you deserve to know all parts of your heritage. You deserve nothing but love, my little flower."
To honor that part of her daughter and not wanting to start her life with lies, Hermione named her Jeanne Rose Delacour Granger, making Delacour a second middle name. Even before Fleur, she'd always liked France and she liked the idea of giving her daughter a French version of her middle name. Mara helped with the filing of the paperwork to get a muggle birth certificate. Hermione had frowned at the line printed 'father' but there was nothing she could do without violating the secrecy statute so she just put down Delacour on that line. For the magical birth certificate, she put Fleur's full name down on the registration form, and once completed, the certificate magically appeared in the next instant. A copy was automatically created in the magical vital statistics office in Ottawa. Mara said Hermione could take her copy to the proper office in the British Ministry of Magic when she moved back so they would resolve Jeanne's citizenship in both muggle and magical records.
A couple of days after Jeanne's birth, Hermione stopped feeling the tether to Fleur. Over the last weeks of her pregnancy, she had been able to successfully ignore it enough that she didn't really think about it. Then, the day after the baby was born, the connection had suddenly strengthened, and she could feel an overwhelming sadness and hurt in her mate. It was so strong, it felt like Fleur was nearby. But late on the next day it was gone altogether. As the days passed, Hermione kept trying to reach out and sense her, but there was nothing. Regardless of her conflicted feelings on their past, the yearning and the heartbreak that still stole her breath away, Fleur was Jeanne's mother. Their daughter, who was not to blame for their actions and mistakes, deserved both parents. Thus, it was as a concerned co-parent and not any other reason that she worried over Fleur's safety, and she debated contacting Harry about it. The other part of her argued that a vanished connection shouldn't be her concern. They were not together and she had to focus on exams. A couple of months wasn't too long to wait, so Hermione had stuck to her plan to seek the Veela out after her NEWTs.
But NEWTs were now finished and she was currently sitting in the Three Broomsticks and no closer to figuring out why she could no longer sense her presence. She had hoped the connection would get stronger once she got to England. With Fleur in Egypt, it made sense for it to be weak, but non-existent? The goblin at Gringotts spoke about her as if she was fine, though. That should have eased some of Hermione's worry and yet it didn't.
Hermione finished the last of her butterbeer just as Minerva walked in. The headmistress was already familiar with her disguise and gave her a fond smile as Hermione stood up and walked over to her.
"I'm a little late, I do apologize –"
"Please don't worry about it, Professor. It was nice to sit and think for a while," interrupted Hermione, gazing upon her favorite professor with warmth. It felt good to do this. To be back and not feel like the world was closing in on her. She looked forward to catching up with everyone after the move.
"Well, the reason I am a little late was because I wanted to get your result for today's arithmancy NEWT. I also have unofficial results for the others," said Minerva with a smile.
"Oh?" Hermione blinked, suddenly nervous. She'd never gotten used to this part, this waiting for test results.
"Outstandings for all seven, of course," exclaimed the professor proudly.
Hermione exhaled in relief. Minerva smiled knowingly, then gestured for Hermione to follow her upstairs.
"And how's the wee one?" asked Minerva softly.
"She's perfect," answered Hermione proudly. "I wanted to thank you again for the flexibility, Professor. It helped in keeping Jeanne to as close to her normal schedule as possible. And I wish I could stay longer to chat but I really need to be getting back."
"Nonsense, Miss Granger. Family first. I'm just happy to see you off. We'll make plans for tea after you move back."
Hermione hummed in agreement.
They entered one of the rooms. She waved her wand to remove her disguise and she was once again her usual self in her jeans, button-down shirt, and tweed blazer. Hermione gathered the bag she had packed before today's NEWT.
"That's everything then," Hermione said with a sigh. "I'll send an owl after my parents and I have settled. Thank you again for everything. We'll talk soon."
"Safe travels, Hermione," said Minerva, pulling Hermione into a gentle hug.
*::::*
Hermione stepped out of the floo in a magical bar in Ottawa that was connected to the international floo network. The bar's patrons directed mildly curious glances but for the most part ignored her. She didn't stay long, apparating home as soon as she was clear of the floo.
Because their house was in a non-magical neighborhood, Hermione apparated into the shed in the backyard. There weren't many protections on the house, it would be strange for a delivery person to not be able to reach the front door or a neighbor's child prevented from running onto the property to chase an errant ball or frisbee, but anti-apparition wards gave her peace of mind.
Entering the small house through the back door into the kitchen, Hermione called out as she set down her bag and took off her blazer. Sarah walked in carrying a sleeping infant. Hermione beamed. Just ten weeks old and Jeanne was the most important thing in her world.
"How did exams go?" asked Sarah softly.
"Good. Let's go into the living room," suggested Hermione. They made their way into the living room where Hermione sat down on one side of the long couch. Sarah placed the baby in her arms, then sat down next to her. "Results aren't official but Professor McGonagall said it is likely I'm getting Outstandings on all."
Before Sarah could respond, Jeanne stirred at hearing Hermione's voice and slowly woke up.
"That's wonderful," said Sarah, smiling at her daughter and granddaughter. "You were always so worked up when waiting for test results. I'm glad Minerva let you know before you left."
By this time, Jeanne was fully awake and aware her mother was holding her; she rooted around, searching for Hermione's breast.
Chuckling, Hermione whispered, "I know, hungry girl."
Quickly unbuttoning her shirt and settling her daughter until she was relaxed and nursing, she returned her attentions to her mother.
"Any problems here?"
"No, Jeanne was an angel. Emptied her bottles, sleeping a bit longer at night. She's a happy child, just like you were."
Hermione's lips stretched into a smile. Her daughter's happiness was all that mattered.
"Well, things are wrapped up here," her mother sighed, leaning back. Sarah didn't need to say more. Hermione knew they were all anxious to head back. With the help of Mara and some of her government friends, they were Grangers once again, with all the proper identification papers and records sorted. The house and practice had been sold. The deed for her parents' new house and the lease for her flat in England were signed. They were ready.
Mara had given her a short list of names of trusted healers with experience in mental health but the only person Hermione trusted was her. They didn't have it all figured out yet, whether they would arrange for international floo travel or firecall or portkey, or just do long distance chats over the telephone every few weeks, but Hermione argued the hassle would be worth not having to build trust again with someone new. And since Jeanne was no longer protected by a Veela pregnancy ward, she could choose whatever pediatric healer she wanted.
Hermione was lost in thought when Sarah repeated her name to get her attention.
"Yeah, Mum?"
"I asked, did you see her?"
A heavy weight settled on her chest. The not knowing. The heartbreak. Ever since she told them about Fleur, her mom had been trying to get her to open up more about her feelings. But her parents being aware of Fleur and what happened was one thing, talking about it in depth was another. She had barely managed it with Mara even after resolving to be open with her all those months ago. It was just so damned hard to talk about how her heart had been ripped from her chest, and that she had willingly let it happen.
Hermione shook her head. "Out of the country with her husband. Don't know when she'll be back." She went back to cooing at her daughter, indicating that was all she was going to say to Sarah on the subject. Her mother sighed, patted the brunette's knee, and stood up and left the room to give them some alone time.
As she continued to whisper to Jeanne and ramble about all of the new people she would be meeting once they moved, Hermione tried not to think about her worry for the Veela. But it was always difficult to let her mind and logic rule over her when she was holding her daughter. Memories of that night couldn't be wiped away when the result of it held tightly to her thumb as she nursed. No matter how many times she tried to convince herself otherwise, and no matter how Fleur had reacted afterwards, Hermione knew deep down that love filled their hearts that night.
Those emotions she had felt coming from Fleur before their connection cut out bothered her. She had told herself her plan today had been to talk, get some things off her chest, let her know about Jeanne, and move on once and for all. But the other thing she had wanted to do was check in, to see for herself that the woman was okay. Her heart knew why.
"I still love your maman, you see," Hermione confessed quietly to her daughter, fighting back the sudden sting in her eyes. "And I know she'll love you. She'll love you so much."
She shook her head, pushing everything back down again. It wasn't the greatest coping mechanism, but until she saw Fleur again and got the closure she desperately needed, it was the best she could do in the meantime.
She just hoped wherever Fleur was, that she was safe and happy.
A/N: What is Fleur doing? Find out in the next chapter
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ceMR: Definitely need to communicate. Just a while longer before they see each other again
kpop1392as: Thanks!
Cally: Thanks, I hope you liked this chapter too
spenlove79: I hope your non-surprise was welcomed lol. Thanks for reading
Meridyna: I certainly plan to finish this fic, barring emergencies and natural disasters. Thanks for reading
Guests: Thanks for reading and for the comments. Hope this update answered some questions