3
Yamcha The Desert Bandit
"Set it down! Did you hear me? Land this thing!"
Sighing, Vegito directed Nimbus down. "What a place to want to stop," he commented, bringing his whimsical vehicle to a halt over the desert floor, "What'd you want?"
Bulma unfurled her arms from around Vegito's chest and let herself fall through the Nimbus. Then, she dusted herself off and said, "I couldn't hold on anymore. We'll need to install some kinda strap or passenger seat on that thing if you want me to ride it, seeing as it doesn't think I'm pure of heart."
"You do wanna collect seven mysterious orbs to wish for a boyfriend," Vegito reminded her. Oddly, Nimbus seemed to morph a little - as if it were nodding its head.
"Why did you even come along with me if you thought what I wanted was so stupid?" Bulma argued.
Vegito shrugged, responding, "I was bored."
Huffing, Bulma pulled out the Dragon Radar and began walking away from the now-confused boy. Jumping off of Nimbus, Vegito said, "You can go do your own thing or something," then trailed after Bulma. "Are we near a Dragon Ball?" he asked, absently resting a hand on his gut.
"Yep," Bulma replied, "After this one, we'll only have two left to find. As Vegito came to a sudden stop, Bulma did too. "What?" she followed his eyes to a set of boulders just a few meters, "Do you see something?"
Vegito stayed silent for a moment, then resumed his pace. "Prolly not," he decided, catching up to Bulma.
As the two walked on, a tiny blue cat poked her head out of hiding. "They almost saw us, Yamcha!" she panicked.
"Yeah, that was too close. Did you get a good look at the guy with the purple hair, Puar? I didn't," her scarred partner asked, leaning against the rocky surface, "I bet they've got some good loot in their bag."
"So, what's our game-plan?"
"I say we wait until they set up camp for the night, then take their stuff," Yamcha smirked.
"But they'll reach Aru Village at this rate!" Puar pointed out.
"Oh yeah. Good catch, pal," Yamcha nodded, "I guess we'll just jump 'em now then. Hey you!"
His boots kicking up dust as he sped towards the pair, Yamcha kept his smirk. Then, he skidded into an imposing stance. "Empty the bag, you two!" he ordered, his spiky fringe casting a shadow over his eyes.
"Huh? Who's this?" Vegito faced the bandit, "You know this guy, Bulma?"
"Huh?"
What ensued next was akin to something from a shampoo commercial. Bulma flicked her head around to get a look at the newcomer, leaving her gorgeous locks of lilac hair to wave in the humid desert air. Her eyes sparkled under the afternoon sun, catching each ray of sunlight perfectly to create a mosaic of angelic beauty on her face.
Yamcha felt his heart stop.
Spluttering, he took a step back. "C'mon, man," he thought, "You've robbed people before. What makes her so different? Just cause she's a girl? A really beautiful girl?"
"D-Did you hear me?" he demanded, "Let's see what you have in your bag! Lickety-split!"
"Wait, is this what being robbed is?" Vegito wondered, "Bulma, are we being robbed?"
"I guess," Bulma shrugged.
"You must be deaf or stupid," Yamcha tried to put his imposing aura back on, but failed, "I said empty the bag!"
"How about we fight for it?" Vegito grinned, "The last guy I fought was super weak, anyway."
"If you want, kid," Yamcha took the handle of his cutlass.
"Hey Bulma, have you still got that sword I had? I put it in one of your capsules," Vegito whispered.
"Oh, sure."
After a second of rummaging, Bulma threw down the capsule. As Yamcha's jaw dropped, Vegito hoisted the massive blade over his shoulder. His hand shaking now, the bandit drew own weapon. "Swordfight!" Vegito announced, leaping in the air and swinging his sword downwards with no difficulty.
Yamcha sidestepped the attack, then jumped up onto the blade. He ran up its length, kicking Vegito in the jaw as he reached him. The boy went flying, spiralling down and hitting the ground with a thud. He was up again in less than a second, though. "Who needs a sword?" he muttered. Then, he charged.
Yamcha, who was now back on Vegito's level, swung his cutlass as his foe neared. In response, Vegito raised his index finger. He blocked the swipe with his digit, earning a surprised gasp from Yamcha and a cheer from Bulma. Before Yamcha could pull his weapon back, Vegito grabbed the blade and snapped it.
The bandit leapt backwards to gain some ground. Catching his breath, he said, "You're one tough kid."
"Can we keep fighting?" Vegito called, "It's lunchtime soon and I wanna get this over with before then."
Gritting his teeth, Yamcha responded, "Oh, you've asked for it now!"
He ran, his fingers curled like claws. A dark energy spiked through his fingers. "Wolf Fang Fist!" Yamcha bellowed, jabbing at Vegito.
However, Vegito just caught his wrist. "Cool," he complimented, before kicking Yamcha so hard in the chest that he was sent soaring backwards. Once again, Vegito rested a hand on his stomach, feeling it rumble ever so slightly. Before he could start thinking about lunch, though, he had to ward off the bandit, so he jogged over to where Yamcha had landed.
The bandit groaned. Clutching his chest, he managed to say, "You won, kid. L-Lemme go, okay?"
"Did you get him?" Bulma hurried over, half-hiding behind the tailed boy.
"No you didn't!" a jovial voice yelled in the distance. Whoever spoke cleared their throat, then continued, "You fools thought that was the real Yamcha? Ho ho ho!"
Glancing to the right, Vegito raised an eyebrow. Despite Yamcha's current position on the floor, there appeared to be a second Yamcha standing off in the distance, posing in front of son. "Huh?" Vegito looked back down, but by the time he had, the first Yamcha was gone. "Wait--" the boy peered around, finding that both Yamchas had suddenly vanished into thin air.
Meanwhile, Yamcha and Puar were booking it across the dusty ground. "Thanks for the save, pal!" Yamcha panted as he ran.
"No problem," Puar responded, morphing back into her original form.
. . .
"The next Ball must be here."
Aru Village was settled neatly in a small oasis - its entirety overshadowed by a towering palm tree. From the mound overlooking the tiny town, Vegito managed to get a fairly good lay of the land. Skidding down the sandy slope, he quickly made his way between the small buildings with Bulma trailing behind.
"Hello? Anyone here?" she called, upon finding the place empty.
Vegito added, "Are you sure the Dragon Ball's here?"
"It's either here or buried somewhere! Let's try in here."
Her eyes still on her radar, Bulma wandered over to the nearest building and tapped her knuckles against its wooden door. Eventually, the door was answered by an old lady with a shotgun. "You're not Oolong the Terrible, are you?" the armed stranger demanded.
"N-No!" Bulma stepped away cautiously, "We're looking for the Dragon Balls. They're these small orbs tha--"
"I know what they are!" the old woman lowered her firearm. She stepped back into her abode, which the two adventurers took as an invitation inside. "I take it you're not pawns of the Terrible Oolong, then," the stranger said, setting her gun up on a shelf.
"Who's this Oolong guy?" Vegito questioned.
"A shape-shifting demon that's been terrorising us for some time now. He travelled down from Otherworld to torture us living folk by taking our daughters."
"Oh, God," Bulma blurted, "That's horrible."
"Quite," the old woman agreed, heading over to a small set of cupboards. She cracked one open and retrieved a distinct orange orb from within. "This is what you're looking for, yes?" she asked.
"Mm-hmm," Bulma nodded, "Can we have it?"
"This old thing's been lying around here for years. I can't just part with it."
Bulma noticed Vegito shift in her peripheral vision. "Would you give it to us if we got rid of Oolong?" she bargained.
"You mean if I get rid of Oolong," Vegito corrected her.
"I suppose I could hand it over - if you manage to best him. Just be careful. He's a shapeshifter, after all."
"A what?" Vegito said.
"It means he can change how he looks," Bulma explained. Casting his mind back to his fight with Yamcha, Vegito recalled how a second of the bandit had appeared.
"Huh..."