Jean walks past the front desk of the hotel with confidence of a woman that belongs. Only the slightest hesitation comes over her before knocking on Lucien's door. His footsteps come closer to the door causing her stomach to flip. "Who is it?"
"Lucien, it's me." She answers a slight quiver in her voice.
Lucien opens the door greeting her with his brilliant smile. "Jean!" He glances at his watch. "Am I late?"
"No, no. I'm early. I decided to come up rather than wait in the lobby. Would you rather I go back down?"
"Never. I am so very glad you are here. Come in." He stands aside to allow Jean to cross into his room.
With the door closed he makes his way to her, wrapping his arms around her from behind. Jean leans heavily into his embrace taking comfort in his solid frame behind her. She lets out a small sigh, chiding herself for getting so comfortable with his touch in such a short time. How will she ever cope not reaching for him once back in Ballarat?
"What is it Jean?" He whispers in her ear.
"I was just thinking how I will need to be more careful once I'm home." She turns in the circle of his arms. She can't read his face if her words have hurt him or if he doesn't understand her meaning either way she doesn't want him to be concerned about her intentions. Jean stretches up to reach his lips easier, placing a soft lingering kiss to his lips while her fingers trace the lines of his beard. When she pulls away there is nothing but love between them.
"You know Jean we could look at this as a game." He is wearing his devilish grin.
"A game?" Her brow raises questioningly.
"Or better yet one of my covert operations. I'll dust off my secret training skills and well you are already more clever than me so I have no doubt you will be a master of deception."
Jean's brow furrows yet she can't help but laugh at him. "I am not sure if I'm flattered by that but yes, maybe we can have some fun with keeping our secret." She looks at him skeptically.
"What? You don't think I can keep this a secret do you?"
"It's just…." She smoothes down his lapel as if consoling his pride. "You sometimes get overzealous especially when you have too much to drink."
"Aaah."
She turns away from him, scanning the room for something that can keep her hands busy. "Do you have everything packed?" The small case that he borrowed from Christopher sits on the bed.
"Yes, all but these." He holds up the pajamas she had worn last time she was in this room. "There isn't room. I was hoping you could take them for me."
Jean notices a slight tremble in his outstretched hand holding the pajamas out towards her. He's nervous of me! "Certainly. I suppose we should get going if you want to make your train."
She takes a step towards the door when Lucien stops her. "Wait. I need to do this now since I won't be able to at the station." He pulls her close to kiss her deeply with a promise for someday. When they pull apart they both need a moment to catch their breath. "I'm ready now."
The station is busy with weekend travelers. Lucien keeps his hand tight around hers not wanting to lose her in the bustling crowd. By the time they get to the platform for the train to Ballarat the crowd has thinned. The steam from the waiting train blankets the area.
"You'll call me when you get home?"
"I will."
"And tell Mattie and Charlie I'm thinking of them."
"I will."
"And you'll remember to check on my plants."
"I will." Her mouth opens again. "Jean, I will do everything you asked me to do. Promise." He crosses his heart with his finger. "Now will you be alright getting yourself back to Christopher's from here. It is much busier than I anticipated."
"I'll be fine Lucien." The whistle blows warning the passengers to board. "You better get going."
"Jean…" His eyes are glassy, his hand cups her cheek, there is so much more he wants to tell her; so much more in his heart that she should know before he sees her again in Ballarat.
She steps in closer to him, kissing him on the cheek and whispers. "I know Lucien." She pulls away just enough to look into his eyes. "I'll talk to you later. Now go." He brings her hand that he has been holding to his lips before letting her fingers slip from his.
He steps onto the train, turning to see his Jean smiling at him. The neatly folded pajamas held tight in her grasp to her chest. He raises a hand to wave back mirroring hers. He can't make out what she says, the noise and steam drowning the words but he can imagine. He can dream that she said the words he hopes to hear soon, so he says, more to himself, "I love you too."
Jean stays on the platform long after the train is out of sight. She finds that she feels so empty watching him go yet fuller than she has in so very long knowing that he cares for her. So lost in her thoughts Jean is unaware of how long she had been staring into the distance until the platform began to fill once again with people preparing for the arrival of the next train.
She walks out of the station holding Lucien's dirty pajamas wearing a genuine smile. A smile that someone wears when they have the best secret of all, a smile of someone that is in love. Jean meanders down the center part of town, not ready to head back to the cottage, back to being a mum and grandmother.
The street is lined with many shops. There seems to be something for everyone in this part of the city. She finds a dress for Amelia that she can't pass by in one. Another window has a display of women's clothes that catches her eye.
She ventures inside just to see the styles. Jean makes her way through the racks of clothes. Her hand runs over a wool pair of trousers. "Would you like to try them on ma'am?"
"Oh! I don't think so. Thank you."
"Alright. I'll be over there…"
"Actually, I think I would."
Jean stares at herself in the mirror. They are nothing fancy but she does love the look of them. A housekeeper of Doctor Blake's would never wear such a thing as a pair of trousers but, "I won't be a housekeeper forever." She says aloud to herself.
With a confidence that Jean hasn't felt in a very long time She decides to make one more purchase. Something that she hasn't dared to think to buy in many years. Maybe it is because she has been walking around with his pajamas all morning or maybe it is the idea of being more than just a housekeeper that gives her the idea to look at the nightwear but whatever the reason she is determined to find something special.
There are several nightgowns that are lovely that she could get much use out of but her hands pass them by. A black silk causes her to blush just at the idea of what it suggests. It is a soft pink chiffon, sleeveless with lace that she pauses at. She runs her fingers over the lace, the red of her nail polish a sharp contrast to the delicate pink. Refusing to think too long on whether it is a foolish purchase or not, she takes it in her hand to pay.
The items, neatly wrapped in soft tissue paper, are tucked out of sight in the room she is staying in. She busies herself the rest of the afternoon with her granddaughter and cooking dinner. The hopes of the morning slowly fade as the hours pass with no phone call.
Jean excuses herself early after the dinner dishes are put away. "Mum, are you alright?"
"Of course, dear, just tired. It's been a long day."
"That's because you insist on getting up with Amelia and knowing you, you aren't going back to sleep in the morning."
Jean nods, giving a weak smile. "Yes, I'm sure that's it."
Once behind closed doors, Jean allows the tears that she has been holding in fall. Sitting on the bed she brushes them away, annoyed at herself for caring so much. It's just like Lucien to forget to call. It means nothing.
The bag with her purchases is beside her. She removes the items one by one. The dress for Amelia is draped over the crib, the others she places in her suitcase with the other items that have yet to be unpacked for lack of a place to put them.
Lucien's pajamas should go with the dirty clothes but she hesitates, bringing them to her face. She breathes in the distinctively masculine scent that is him. Yes, he got distracted that's all. Wrapped in Lucien's shirt Jean drifts off to sleep.
The phone rings mid morning. Jean would have leaped to answer if she didn't have a sleeping baby on her shoulder. Ruby answers it instead.
"Mum, it's for you." Jean tries to contain the happiness that she feels. "It is Mattie." There is a horrible sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach as she hands over the baby.
"Hello."
"Jean, thank goodness I got you. There has been a terrible accident."
Her hand grabs the counter for support, feeling as if her knees will give way at Mattie's words. "What happened to him?"
"There was a murder and a suspect just plowed into them." Jean could feel the bile rise into her throat. Her young friend is rushing through her words, clearly upset.
"Is Lucien alright?"
"What? Yes. It's the Superintendent and Charlie."
"Matthew and Charlie?" A sense of relief washes over her followed by guilt that she is grateful that it isn't Lucien.
"Charlie will be fine but I don't know about the Chief." There is a quiver in Mattie's voice.
"Lucien will make sure he's getting the best care. I'll be home as soon as I can. And Mattie, thank you for calling."
"Lucien insisted that I let you know."
"He did?"
"Yes Jean. He also wanted me to tell you that he is sorry that he didn't call himself."
"Mum?" Jean is uncertain how long she stood in the kitchen with her hand on the receiver but by the look in Ruby's face it has been long enough for concern.
"I need to go."
Ruby nods, "You belong in Ballarat with your friends and Lucien."
"Will you and Christopher be alright?" Jean doesn't want to abandon her family despite her heart already longing for home.
"We will be fine. Now go pack while I phone Christopher. If he hurries we can get you to the station in time for the next train. It will be much faster than the bus." Jean gives Ruby's hand a squeeze, thanking her for the kindness that her daughter-in-law has shown. Jean realizes she has misjudged Ruby from the little she knew of her, making a silent promise to herself to do better.
So much has happened in such a short amount of time. Was that bus ride to Adelaide really only ten days ago? Their lives are different in the knowledge that each possesses the other's love. There will be struggles, things to overcome within the community but with time and Lucien by her side things will work out. When their eyes lock in the hospital corridor she knows that they will be alright. When he reaches out his hand to take hers she knows that whatever happens next they will tackle it together.
It is when they are alone in the car, far from prying eyes, they steal a chaste kiss. They continue on towards home, her fingers laced within in his strong grasp. They move forward, heading towards whatever happens next hand in hand.