Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Twilight or Shadowhunters/Mortal Instruments. Those rights are reserved for Stephanie Myer and Cassandra Claire. I do own the original characters made up for this storyline. Thank you.

Writer's Notes: Thank you Roxhall and delia for your reviews! Bella is a very conflicted character. She went through some big heart break with Edward, and then you have Alec and Jace. Two perfectly good men. Alec is infuriating, and Jace is the one that openly shows how much he cares about her. What will Bella ultimately do? I guess we'll just have to find out. As always, thank you for all the amazing support, I certainly appreciate it. Don't forget to favorite, follow, and review! See you at the next chapter!

[2 weeks later]

"We're not staying here long." Alec said as they walked down the street in Brooklyn. Bella had to get her own clothes. She couldn't just keep wearing Izabell's clothes and Clary agreed. They couldn't go back to the apartment, and Luke sent Bella his credit card to use for some shopping.

Izabell rolled her eyes. "You're always a buzz kill."

Bella smiled at Izabell. "He's right thought. I'm not trying on a thousand outfits. I know my size well. I can just grab stuff I need, and get back to the Institute."

"Mhm." She said and they walked into one shop.

Bella and Alec had interacted only during brief conversations in command. He didn't come to the training room to train with her, just sent Bella, and she was starting to wonder if he was trying to avoid her, or if he really was busy.

Jace hadn't kept his distance, but Bella never let him get close enough to test the boundary.

Jace hated shopping, but he tagged along anyways, and so did Simon. Clary liked to shop, whereas Bella did not. So at least that was one thing in common she had with Jace.

Clary was not afraid to try things on, but Bella didn't want to go through all the hassle.

"I like my clothes on you." Izabell whined when Bella picked a more conservative top.

"Iz, your boobs are smaller than mine, and I'm nearly busting out of everything that I've borrowed. I want normal clothes for when I want to be normal. I'll keep wearing the sexy Shadowhunter gear or whatever, if that makes you happy."

Izabell was still pouting. "How about this." She picked up a sapphire blue top, it was tight fighting, but it was turtlenecked at the top and was sleeveless. "At least try it on once, and then tell me you don't like it, and I'll quit."

Bella sighed, giving in to the hurricane that was Izabell. "Fine." She took the top into the dressing room, and she tried it on. It was tight across her breast, but it wasn't uncomfortable like Izabell's clothing. She had to admit that she did look hot. She walked out to show Izabell, and Jace and Alec were standing there. "Are you happy?"

Izabell grinned. "Yes, you are sexy. Tell me you don't like it?"

"I don't know Iz…"

"You look great Bella." Jace spoke, his arms were crossed, and he was smiling.

Bella offered a small smile back. "Thanks." Her eyes flashed over Alec's and he tried to hide his gaze, but she caught it. "Okay, you win Iz." She said and disappeared into the changing room.

"Do you have to torture her?" Alec asked Izabell.

"It's not torture. Beauty can be painful sometimes." Izabell said matter of fact.

Bella changed back into the shirt that she borrowed from Izabell for today. It was literally the only normal shirt that she owned, and she was thankful for that.

"Okay, I'm going to go with Simon, make sure he doesn't make any fashion mistakes. Do you think you boys can handle Clary and Bella?" Izabell turned to look at her brother and adopted brother of sorts.

"Yes," Alec said. "Go, but please don't take forever. This isn't supposed to be a crazy shopping spree Iz."

Bella came out of the changing room, after Izabell left. "She's gone?"

"Yes, you're in the clear." Jace said with a smile.

Bella sighed a sigh of relief. "Good." She said and looked around. She found a few more tops that she liked. She wasn't big into owning fifty outfits, she just needed like eight to ten outfits to cycle through. She was looking forward to wearing her own underwear again, considering Izabell wore thongs, and Bella didn't like it all too well. Izabell of course had brand new stuff that hadn't been worn yet, so Bella got lucky in that regard.

Clary waved Jace over to ask a question, leaving Alec with Bella.

Bella looked towards the intimates, and she bit her lip.

"It's normal to need those things. Don't feel embarrassed because I'm here." Alec said simply. He could see her look nervously towards the intimates, and he smiled inwardly.

Bella nodded, and they walked over to that section. She tried to tune Alec out, while she selected her bras, which she did hurriedly, and the panties were the same. She looked at a black lace bra that made her stop. She imagined herself in it. The matching panties reminded her of the ones that Alec took off her that night.

Alec was beside her. "Do you want them?"

Bella swallowed. "It's not…necessary."

Against Alec's better judgment he leaned in closer. "You would look great in it." He murmured and leaned back.

Bella blushed, looking away. She grabbed her size and shoved it in her basket, and brushed her hair out of her face, still flushed. She grabbed a better fitting sports bra for training, and some shorts to match.

Alec smirked a little, one of the rare occasions that he did. He followed out of the section, and they went to shoes, which he dreaded, but apparently Bella had too. She just a pair of decent pair of tennis shoes, and some boots. She didn't know when she needed to dress up for whatever random thing they had to do at a place like Pandemonium, but she was sure, that Izabell's wardrobe would accommodate them. At the end, Bella ended up with six pairs of jeans, a few pairs of just jeggings, and leggings. A few pairs of shorts, some tanks that she could wear freely, eight tops, three of which offered more sex appeal than she was used to. The five bras, and ten pairs of underwear, two sports bras, and two spandex shorts, and then some other jogging clothes for some other types of training. She got some sleep clothes, seven sets, and Alec convinced her a robe would be nice. She got her own brush, toiletries, some mascara, and eyeliner, which was all she was willing to buy, and some more hair scrunchies since she broke her last one, and she was tired of wearing her hair down.

Clary ended up with way more than Bella, naturally, and she was just exhausted by the end of it. Simon went along with whatever Izabell picked out for him, and he admitted that he didn't completely hate the style. He would have to get used to skinny jeans, which he didn't find entirely too uncomfortable.

They headed back to the Institute before dark hit.

[The Institute]

Bella put away her clothes and changed into the leggings and longer tunic shirt that buttoned up the front. It was rolled to her elbows and was a light blue. The top few buttons, she left unbuttoned, and it showed a little cleavage, but nothing that she was uncomfortable with. She tied her hair back with the ponytail holder, and left her room, and walked to command.

Alec was the only one there, which made her wonder where everyone else was. He looked up at her when she came to stand next to him. "Feel normal?"

"Yeah." She said and sighed. "I hate shopping."

"I could tell." Alec said, and then scrolled on the tablet. "I have a few Shadowhunters coming in tomorrow. The recall notice was received. Some of the teams went immediately into the field, searching their assigned grid. We've been seeing more demon attacks, closer to the harbor, and around Pandemonium, and the few blocks east of your apartment, and about five blocks west of Simon's." He explained and then he tapped a clear board, and whatever was showing on the tablet reflected on the screen now.

Bella looked at the map. There were different colored dots highlighted on the map.

"I've been able to have these four teams scout this side of the harbor." Alec pointed out, making a circular motion.

"Any details on where my mom could be?" She asked.

"Not yet. Every Eidolon demon that we've managed to catch, hasn't revealed any information about your mother. Not since the club, have we had a demon offer up information about Valentine himself." Alec said with a sigh and looked over at her. Her hair was up, which he had gotten used to seeing her with it down. He reached over, his fingers tugging at her hair scrunchy, letting her hair down.

"What? Why?" Bella turned and glared at him.

Alec gave her a smile. "Looks good down." He commented.

Bella sighed. "You do realize I have a lot of hair, and I get hot when it's down. Right?"

"We're inside." Alec said, and shrugged.

Bella smacked his arm and smiled at him. Jace walked in right then, seeing the strange exchange, and seeing Alec smile. It was just odd. They were mostly arguing. It was weird to see them not at each other's throats.

Jace cleared his throat. "So, Hodge has had himself pinned up in the library for a while. He rarely comes out now. Should we be worried?"

Alec sighed. "He's…not happy with the Clave's decision on letting me head up the missions lately. I tried explaining it to the Clave. He's older, more experienced, but they said that rules are rules. He can't be trusted, and you know that."

"What why?" Bella asked.

"He was a Valentine sympathizer. He was part of the circle that helped Valentine come to power to begin with. When the war started, he chose the wrong side. As his punishment, he was marked with a rune that doesn't allow him to leave the Institute grounds. He was tasked with the job to train upcoming Shadowhunters. "Jace explained.

Alec nodded. "Which is why, Izabell and I grew up here. We didn't grow up in Idris. Our parents were also…sympathizers at first, but when the war started, they chose the Clave then. They weren't allowed in Idris for some time. It's only recently that their banishment was lifted. They travel there now to help with diplomacy. There are other Institutes spread out over the globe."

Bella didn't know all of this. She had seen Hodge a few times, here and there, but he would only show her some different runes, that she already recognized, but he gave the more detailed background on them, and why they were used.

"Who's coming back to the Institute tomorrow?" Jace asked, changing the subject.

"Ah, Jasper and Emmett. They're C team. I think they have Jacob Black on their team. That team was together before I took control." Alec explained.

Jace nodded. "It's been a while since I've seen Jasper Whitlock."

"Yeah, he was transferred in from Texas, I think a year ago. He floats a lot." Alec said.

Bella was just thinking about some weird part of her memories that were coming back to her lately. The block that Magnus removed gave her a few memories right away, but over the last two weeks she was starting to remember other things. They come to her in small waves, and sometimes it caused her to space out.

"Jocelyn, you're pregnant, you can't keep letting him do this." Maryse's voice was concerned for her friend.

"Maryse, I know. I caught him injecting me with something. I don't know what it was. I don't even know if he did that with Jonathan and Bella." Jocelyn didn't realize that Bella was hiding in her usual spot where she went when her and daddy started yelling.

"Jocelyn…. this is serious. He's been experimenting with demon blood. We must convince the other members of the circle that he's gone mad. He's injecting himself with demon blood. What if that's what he's doing to Clary?" Maryse said, rubbing a hand down Jocelyn's arm.

Bella blinked a few times, and Alec and Jace were staring at her now. "W-what?"

Alec frowned. She was incredibly pale. "Bella, what's wrong?" He asked her again.

"I…just a memory…" She murmured.

"What was it about?" Jace asked.

"Maryse…" Bella murmured.

Alec looked at Jace and then back at Bella. "My mother?"

Bella nodded. "Is she your mother? I didn't know…her name before now. She was talking to my mom. She was trying to convince my mom to run."

"Why would she do that?" Alec asked.

"Because Valentine was injecting her while she was pregnant with Clary. Maryse thought that maybe it was demon blood." Bella explained. "He…He was injecting himself with the demon blood."

Alec didn't realize that was how Valentine was controlling the demons back then, and that was probably how he was doing it now. "Is that all you remember?"

Bella nodded, looking at Alec. "I don't feel so great." She murmured, feeling a little dizzy. "I'm going to faint."

Alec caught her against him. "Damnit." He swung her into his arms before Jace could. He moved past Jace towards the infirmary. He lay her down on the bed gently and brushed the hair out of her face. He leaned in, listened to her breaths, and then sat back and sighed.

Jace followed him. "Why would she faint?"

"I'm not sure." Alec said, just as confused as Jace. "At least she announced she was going to faint before she did. Let her rest. Go find Clary, tell her what happened." He said, and Jace nodded, leaving the room. Alec looked back at Bella's sleeping face. "What's going on with you…" he murmured, and lifted his hand to her face, brushing her cheek with the back of his hand before he left the room to let her rest. He went back to command and the board was lighting up. He frowned, as he took the earpiece from it's stand, and put it in his ear.

"What's going on?" Alec said, and he heard Jasper's voice come back at him.

"A large demon gathering, right outside the harbor. Can you send A and B team this way?" Jasper said, a little out of breath.

"Will do." He hit something on the tablet and pulled up B team. "I'm sending alerts to B team now. I'll assemble Jace and Izabell and send them to meet you at the harbor. Try to hold them off as much as you can." He relayed.

"Thank you," Jasper said, and then he was silent as he hung up the call in his ear.

Jace and Izabell rushed to command. "What's happening?" Jace asked quickly.

"Harbor, now. Jasper is needing help with a large-scale demon gathering. Sounds like he's already in combat." Alec relayed.

Jace nodded. "Got it." He said, looking at the map on the screen, and then him and Izabell left command, going to the front and leaving out, heading towards the harbor, activating their speed runes.

Clary and Simon joined Alec in command. "Bella passed out?"

"Yes, she's in infirmary resting. Simon, can you check on her please."

Simon nodded, and left command to go check in on Bella.

Alec looked at Clary. "Okay, this is important. I may have to go and help the others. I won't be able to stand here and look at this map and help. Do you think you can handle coms?"

Clary nodded. "Yes."

Alec nodded, and took the earpiece out and handed it to her. "I'm going to gear up. Stand here, you see this light up, hit this," he showed her what she needed to do. "You'll hear someone talk to you in your ear. To merge all the coms on one channel, hit this." He pointed to another button. "This map is of Brooklyn. The points on the map are color coded. Red is A team, that's Jace, me, and Iz. C team is green. That's Jasper Whitlock, Emmett Cullen, and Jacob Black. B team is blue. They are Alice Cullen, Rosalie Hale, and Embry Call." He explained quickly.

"Okay, got it." Clary looked at the screen. "Black blips are demons?"

"Yes."

"That's a lot of blips." Clary said.

"I know." Alec said and rushed to grab his gear, which wasn't much. He went back to command to check on Clary. "Are you sure you're, okay?"

"Yes Alec, go!" Clary said, and Alec nodded, leaving to head to the harbor to make sure there was plenty of back up.

[Five hours later]

Clary was exhausted from standing in command for five hours. She managed to direct the others without too much hiccups. Fortunately, between her and Simon, they knew Brooklyn pretty well, and that made things easier.

Bella came too finally, stirring and looking around. She realized she was in the infirmary. She had passed out. She got up slowly, getting to her feet, testing to make sure she wouldn't fall over. She wandered back in command, expecting to see Alec and Jace, but it was Clary and Simon. "What's going on?"

Simon looked at Bella. "Demon attack at the harbor. Required more hands."

Clary was staring at the screen. "Yes, got it." She said, and then did something on the tablet. Some of the blips disappeared on the screen. The demons were retreating it looked like. "Damage report." Clary said and paused. She pulled up Rosalie's picture on the screen, marking her red for wounded. Then she pulled up Embry's picture and marked him red for wounded, and then pulled up Alec's picture and marked him wounded. "Is he there with you?" Clary's tone changed.

Bella looked at the screen. Alec was hurt, and that made her feel uncomfortable. What had happened? How badly was he hurt?

"Yes, have Magnus portal in the wounded. We'll treat them when they arrive." Clary said and then pulled up Izabell's picture and marked her wounded. "Four?" Clary asked, keeping her voice steady as her heart slammed in her chest. Seeing Alec and Izabell's picture up there as wounded, was making her feel anxious. "Okay." She said and looked at Simon. "Go get Hodge, tell him we have four wounded coming in. Magnus is portaling in the wounded. We need more hands. Bella, are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine. What do I need to do?"

"Get a stele, prepare with Hodge to treat the wounded." Clary commanded.

Bella nodded and Simon and Bella left to get Hodge and rejoined Clary in the command center. A portal ripped open, and Magnus stepped through half carrying Alec. Bella and Simon went forward, grabbing Alec from him. He was semi-conscious but was a little out of it. "Get him to the infirmary." Magnus barked and disappeared.

Simon helped get him to the bed and lay him down. Bella looked over him, finding the wound on his arm, and took the stele she was given by Hodge and drew the healing wound over the mark. It started healing, and Alec sucked in air and groaned.

"Simon, go help Magnus and Hodge with the others." Bella said quickly, and then she looked at Alec's pale face. "Alec, can you hear me?"

"Yes." Alec said, his voice a little hoarse.

"Are you still hurt?"

Alec winced, moving his good arm, lifting his shirt on the side. "It clawed me." He said, his voice strained.

Bella moved to the wound, drawing the healing rune over it, and the wound started sealing.

Alec felt the pain relief and he sighed. "Thank you." He muttered, opening his eyes more to look at her. He reached up and stroked her cheek. "Don't worry about me. Worry about Iz. She got hit hard." He tried to sit up, but Bella made him stop.

"No, you need to lay down, let the runes take hold better." Bella murmured.

"I'm fine." Alec said and pushed up anyways, wincing a little. "See."

Bella sighed, and then looked up when Hodge carried in Izabell laying her in the next bed over, and Simon carried a small girl in his arms. She was blonde, and unconscious. Hodge was already using runes to heal Izabell.

Bella moved automatically over to the bed that Simon set the girl down on. "This is…"

"Rosalie Hale." Alec supplied and stood, stretching and winced some more.

Bella moved her hands over Rosalie's body, finding a wound on her upper thigh, and one to her side. She ripped her pants open a little wider to see the wound clearly, and used the stele to mark the wound, and then ripped open her shirt, pulling it to the side, to mark her side. The wounds started closing and healing, and Rosalie breathed in, choking a little. "Hey, you're okay." She said, steadying Rosalie.

Rosalie opened her eyes, looking up at Bella with her violet blue eyes. "Thanks." She said, looking over at Alec. "Alec, are you okay?"

Alec walked over to her slowly. "Yeah, next time when I say down, I mean down." He said. "Rest. Don't move too much." He said and looked over at Hodge and Izabell. Izabell was still unconscious but her rune was healing her. So that was progress.

Jace walked in carrying Embry call, and lay him down on the bed. Bella looked at Rosalie and smiled before patting her hand and walking over to take care of Embry.

[Two hours later]

Jasper, Alice, Jacob, Emmett and Magnus returned using the portal Magnus was able to create.

"That was a doozey." Emmett said as he pulled his shirt off upon entering the command center. His runes covered his body, and he was in really good shape, like an Olympian God.

Bella was sitting in a chair when the other four Shadowhunters appeared with Magnus. She tried not to stare at Emmett, so she looked over at Magnus. "You okay?"

"Oh biscuit, I'm always okay." Magnus said with a smile, walking over to her and leaning down, kissing her full on the mouth.

Bella smiled. "I'm glad you were able to help."

Jasper looked over at Bella. Her voice was a new one. "Howdy. I'm Jasper Whitlock." He said, pulling his shirt off too like Emmett had. His body as incredibly toned, and Bella realized that every Shadowhunter guy she has met has been really built. Even Alec was.

"Uh, Bella Fairchild." She said with a frown. It was weird to introduce herself like that. She had memories of being Bella Fairchild, so it was trying to get used to saying it out loud now.

"No shit, the Fairchilds exist still?" Jacob said, and he was topless too. He looked over at Bella. He was buff like Emmett, but like a bronze god. His hair was long, pulled back in a ponytail. "I'm Jake."

Bella blinked, staring at Jacob, forgetting to speak for a moment.

Jacob grinned. "I think I broke her."

Alec closed his eyes, sighing. Jacob always had that effect on all the women, even Izabell had a lapse of being awestruck by the golden god that was Jacob Black.

Bella shook her head. "Uh. Hi." She said, snapping out of it. "I'm sorry."

"It's cool, I'm used to it." Jake said. "You fixed Embry up, right?"

"Yeah, he's resting now." Bella said simply.

"Thank you. He's like a brother to me. I appreciate it." Jake said, and then stretched. "Boss man, I'm hitting the shower. Things are quiet now, yeah?"

Alec waved a hand. "Yes, please go shower." He said and looked back at the screen.

Alice smiled, moving to Alec's side and shoulder bumped him. She was pixie like, from the pixie haircut to her small face, and her small frame. Her delicate skin was marked with runes, and Bella thought that it looked so unnatural.

Alec looked down at her. "What?"

"It's been a while since I've seen you." Alice mentioned.

"And?"

Alice raised a brow. "You are all proper now. Leadership has made you not fun."

Simon laughed. "Wait, was Alec fun before?"

Alec looked at Simon, narrowing his eyes.

Alice laughed. "Yes, he used to not be such a stick in the mud. It was before Maryse and Robert went back to Idris for diplomatic work. When he didn't have to run everything."

Bella smiled, trying to imagine Alec, smiling and more carefree. She would like to see that one day. Suddenly, a memory flashed into her mind again, and her smile faltered.

"Bella. Where are you?" Valentine's voice called out to Bella. She was hiding of course. Anytime her daddy appeared, she tried to hide, but he always found her. If she didn't show herself now, then he would get angry, and she didn't want him to hurt mommy. She came out of hiding.

"Yes daddy?" Bella's tiny voice trembled a little.

Valentine looked at her. "Ah…my angel. My perfect angel. Come," he said and reached a hand for her.

Bella's tiny hand slipped in his, following him to what he called his office. The Immortal Cup was sitting on his desk, and it gleamed so pretty. She never pointed it out, or spoke of it.

Valentine patted a stool, and Bella hopped up there and sat down. "Jonathan, can you hand me those vials over there?" He called to Jonathan.

Jonathan appeared; his blonde hair gleamed so bright. His eyes were a dark charcoal color. He handed Valentine three vials.

"What is that?" Bella asked.

"Oh, this? This vial contains very special blood from the Angel Raziel. It's pure angel blood." Valentine said, holding the vial up, and swirling it around. The gold swirled with the crimson, and glittered as the light hit it. "Bella, my dear daughter. Can you roll up your sleeve for daddy?"

"Will it hurt?" Bella asked, a little scared.

Jonathan spoke. "It's okay Bells. Daddy won't hurt you." He said, and helped Bella roll up her sleeves.

Bella watched as Valentine took a needle, drawing up the blood from the vial containing pure angel blood. She watched as her father took the needle and carefully stuck Bella in her arm. She looked away, the pinch of pain bringing small tears to her eyes.

"There, there, all done." Valentine cooed.

"I feel funny." Bella murmured.

"That's normal, my perfect angel." Valentine whispered. He leaned in, kissing her forehead. "Now go along, go play. Mummy is sleeping, so don't wake her, okay?"

Bella nodded, hopping down off the stool and ran out of the office to her own room. She pulled her doll from her bed and sat in the corner. Tears brimmed in her eyes, and she looked at her arm, the mark of the needle still there, a tiny bead of blood on the surface. "Why?" She sobbed to herself. She felt weird after the injection. She didn't want anymore.

Bella sucked in a breath, the memory fading away, and she blinked away tears.

"Bella, Bella…" Alec was crouched down in front of her now. "Are you okay?"

"I…" She looked around, there were some concerned faces staring back at her. "I'm okay."

"You're not going to faint again?" Alec asked.

Bella shook her head. "I don't think so."

"Another memory?"

Bella nodded.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really…" She cut her eyes around the room.

Alec nodded. "Okay." He stood, letting out a breath, and looked at his watch. "Okay. Everyone shower, retire for the night. Magnus has put up some wards around the harbor. They'll trip an alarm here to let us know if the demons come back to the harbor. For now, we'll just rest, and collect ourselves and regroup in the morning."

Jasper slung his shirt over his shoulder. "Got it." He said and left the command. Everyone else filtered out, and Simon looked over at Bella, worried.

Jace walked in from the infirmary. "Rose and Embry seem to be doing better. Iz is out cold." He missed Bella's memory moment.

Alec nodded. "Okay. Let them rest. You get rest too. We'll regroup in the morning." He said and looked at Simon. "Clary in the kitchen?"

"I believe so." Simon said and stood. "She hadn't eaten anything the whole time. She was pretty hungry."

Alec nodded. "Get rest. And…. thank you for today. Helping her. You're not a Shadowhunter, but you had our backs out there, so…thank you."

"Of course. I know I'm annoying sometimes, and I talk too much when I'm nervous, but I'm here to help." Simon said with a nod and left command to go check on Clary.

Alec looked back at Bella. "Come on." He said, helped her get up. He looked back at Jace. "Check on Hodge before heading to bed. He seemed out of it earlier. I'm going to make sure she gets to bed." He said and left Jace, staring after him, before sighing and going to check in on Hodge.

Bella and Alec stopped at her door. "Want to talk about your memory?"

"I should." She said and opened her door and motioned for him to follow. He hesitated, but followed her into her room, and closed the door. She moved towards her dresser, grabbing clothes. "I'm taking a shower… you can join me." She said and turned and walked to the bathroom.

Alec swallowed. They hadn't been alone together since that one night. He tried to not to put them in situations like this. "Um, are you sure?"

"Yes Alec," Bella said and started the shower.

He sighed and walked into the bathroom. She was undressing. She was too tired to be embarrassed or self-conscious of her body. She stepped into the shower, and turned, letting the hot water wash over her tired muscles.

Alec pulled his shirt off, unfastening his pants, and getting naked. He took a deep breath, to calm himself, and stepped into the shower with her. The hot water felt nice against his own muscles. His body brushed against hers, and she turned to look up at him.

"Valentine injected me with angel blood." Bella said. "My brother helped him."

"He what?"

Bella nodded and then sighed, resting her head against his chest. "Why was he doing these things?"

Alec's arms came up, around her, pulling her close to him. "I'm sorry…" He murmured.

"I'm sorry about gawking at Jake earlier."

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I…" Bella wasn't sure why she was apologizing. "I don't know."

Alec tilted her face up to look at him, and then he leaned in and kissed her softly. "You are doing something to me Bella. When I got hurt…I thought about you. Thought about how stupid I was to make one wrong step, and…I didn't want to worry you. It sounds bizarre, but…you were one of my first thoughts."

Bella swallowed. "When Clary pulled your picture up, and marked you wounded, I was scared. I didn't know how bad you were hurt. Then Izabell was hurt too, and I just…I don't want anything bad to happen to any of you. It's seems strange, I've only known you guys for a little over 2 weeks, but you're the closest thing to family that I have. My mom was everything Clary and I had…."

"You still have her. We will find her." Alec said.

"What if we don't? Valentine was doing experiments on us. What if he hurts her? What reason does he have to keep her alive?" Bella said, a million other thoughts running through her head.

Alec leaned in, kissing her again. "Don't worry about everything. We'll figure it out, one step at a time…okay?" His voice was always gentle like this when they were alone. He didn't have the fear of being discovered when it was just the two of them. He needed to stop this. He couldn't carry on a relationship with her. It wouldn't be fair to her. But he kissed her anyways, hoisted her up, pinning her against the wall.

Bella gasped with exciting pleasure and kissed him hard on the mouth as the water poured around them. "Now." She gasped against his lips, and he thrust up into her, jolting her senses and his own. She clung around him as he drove up into her. She felt her body electrify as he sent her over the edge, her orgasm building fast. She needed this release. Needed him. She came hard around him, tightened around his hardened shaft, squeezing him until he swelled himself, overflowing, and thrusting into her hard as his cock pulsed, releasing his essence to mix with hers. He was panting and so was she when they finished. He pulled out of her, letting her slide down to her feet. He kissed her again.

She shut off the water, and they got out of the shower, drying off. He moved with her to the bedroom, sliding into bed with her.

"You don't have to stay…" Bella murmured.

"I want to." Alec said and pulled her into his arms.

Bella sighed, laying her head against his bare chest. He kissed the top of her head and she snuggled in close. He drew lazy circles over her shoulder. "Alec…"

"Hmm?" He said, his eyes were closed, relaxing with her against him. He didn't realize how tired he felt.

"Why have you been avoiding me lately?"

Alec opened his eyes, sighing. "Because I knew this would happen. You're doing something to me Bella, and I can't explain it. It's not good for either of us to be together like this."

"I know, but you don't have to avoid me. I'm not going to molest you in front of everyone." Bella said.

Alec chuckled. "I'm not worried about you. I'm more worried about myself. You make it impossible to not want to kiss or hold you."

"Oh." Bella shifted in the bed.

Alec pulled her back to him. "I'm trying…to wrap my head around all this." He said. "I'm going to tell you something about myself that no one else knows, not even Jace…not even Iz."

Bella looked up at him. "You don't have to…if it makes you- "

"Bella, I have never found women attractive because I have always found men attractive." Alec said, interrupting her.

That caused Bella to sit up in the bed and look down at him. "You mean…"

"I always thought that maybe I was gay, or something was wrong with me." Alec sighed, bringing a hand up and rubbing it over his face.

"How do you feel now?" Bella asked.

Alec looked at her. "I find you very beautiful, attractive…but I would be lying if I didn't see the level of attractiveness in other men. Makes this all very confusing for me."

Bella nodded. "So, you're bisexual. There's nothing wrong with being who you are Alec."

"My parents wouldn't think about it like that." Alec muttered.

"Alec, you don't need to fear what your parents will say or do. Is it some weird stigma in the Shadowhunter society?"

"I mean…not exactly. There are no real rules on sexuality Bella, hell, Victor Aldertree is gay and he's part of the Clave." Alec explained.

"Then I don't see a problem."

Alec sighed. "I…" He paused. "I don't know if I want to explore that, Bella. I'm not ready to jump into stuff like that. Besides, I have too much to worry about with this Institute, with you, that I can't focus on that."

"I told you, you don't have to worry about me."

"But I do," Alec said, reaching a hand up, caressing her cheek. "I do, and that scares the hell out of me."

"I didn't think you were scared of anything."

Alec smiled a little. "I'm scared of you getting hurt." He leaned up, kissing her gently. "I should go, get back to my room and rest some before morning surprises us all."

Bella nodded, watched him get out of bed, and go to the bathroom. She sighed, laying back in the bed. He was right about one thing. They should be like this together. She was a distraction for him. He had more important things to do, instead of worrying about her. She would have to train better, harder.

Alec came out of the bathroom, wearing his clothes, and he went over to her, leaning down and kissing her again. "I'm sorry…I would stay but-"

"I understand." Bella smiled. "Go get rest." She said and watched him leave after hesitating again. She shut her eyes, willing sleep to take her. She felt exhausted even after being passed out for five hours earlier. She got her wish, as her body relaxed, and her thoughts faded.