After we had dinner with the McBrides, Namęšéme and I went home and got ready for bed. I was scared to think about how our neighbors would react to me once puberty had truly started kicking in for me. All I had to show for it right now was just a growth spurt that left me looking gangly and not with much muscle throughout my body, but what would've happened when I started growing facial hair or when my voice started changing? What would the McBrides think of me then? Would they see me as I was any longer, or would they start to think I was some kind of freak? I wasn't certain I wanted to know.

Not to mention, I was feeling funny when it came to Frankie. Something about her made butterflies go off in my stomach. Maybe it was her strawberry blonde hair, maybe it was her yellowish-green eyes, maybe it was the way she smiled at me when we had dinner... maybe it was just her. She didn't seem to take much after her parents; Newt had peach blond hair and steely blue eyes while Jewell had dark chestnut brown hair and chocolate brown eyes. (I guess Frankie could've been adopted or something.) Nonetheless, she still felt like a member of the family. How Frankie felt to be among her parents and siblings made me question my own place within the Traversie family (what I knew of it, anyhow). I mean, I knew Namęšéme loved me because I was his granddaughter and I was the only thing left of Náhko'éehe, but did he actually love me? He did seem quick to accept me, but I wondered if it had been a genuine effort or not.

I could've tried to ask myself more questions about my family and where I stood in the world, but I needed to get some sleep. Almost as soon as my head made contact with my pillow, I drifted off. It was then and there that I started having memory-dreams about life back in Malta. Usually, they would just come and go, and I would only remember bits and pieces of my old life. However, there was this one memory-dream that always seemed to stick around no matter how many years had gone by.

The year was 1981. I was only eight years old at the time, and Namęšéme had just driven me to the cemetery where Náhko'éehe had been laid to rest. He took my hand and led me through rows and rows of headstones, most of which were old and seemed to be crumbling away. I couldn't help but look back at the graves while Namęšéme took me to Náhko'éehe's grave. And just like that, we were already there. I could clearly read the name on the headstone: Fern Kanaka Traversie.

"Namęšéme?" I asked my namshim quietly. "What does Kanaka mean?"

"Why, Kanaka means 'gold' in our language, Nonoma," Namęšéme replied.

I hadn't come out to him at this point as a girl, so he was referring to me by my deadname. While I had shown plenty of hints of how I saw myself, even when I was just five years old, Namęšéme just assumed that I was going through a phase. Still, I was just a child. Forthcoming gender identity issues aside, my only worries were in climbing trees and wanting to get the highest score on Donkey Kong.

"Why was her name Kanaka?" I asked again.

Namęšéme chuckled. "Well, it was only her middle name, but we gave her that name because your grandmother and I struck gold with her when she was born. We'd been praying for a long time for even just one child before your mother was born." His face suddenly grew solemn. "We'd even convinced ourselves that it would never happen after all that unnecessary heartbreak... and then came your mother." Now there was a sad smile etched across his lips. "She was our pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, so that's how her middle name came to be Kanaka."

I nodded and looked up to him. "Was I a pot of gold, too, Namęšéme?"

"Well, I guess you could say that. I didn't mind raising you while your mother went off to do crazy and dangerous things with her friends. In a way, I guess it was like starting over again."

"Thanks, Namęšéme. I love you."

"I love you too, néxahe."

Namęšéme and I both hugged right there in front of Náhko'éehe's grave.

I soon woke up, tears having welled up in my eyes. I lost count on how many times I had that memory-dream play in my mind, but I knew this was far from the last time I'd revisit it. After fully coming to, I looked up to see Namęšéme standing over me.

"You already awake, Jessica?" Namęšéme asked me.

I just let out a groggy "Yeah."

"I know it's only 8:00, but you know what we gotta do now, right?"

I didn't fully understand. "I don't know, what?"

"We need to go back to school shopping. We've only got two weeks before you can go back to school."

I was still confused. "Wait, did we ever hear anything back from the middle school on whether I got in?"

"Oh, right, so the principal of Ewing-Halsell Middle School called the house yesterday..."

"And?"

Namęšéme smiled at me, clearly excited by the news he was about to give. "You got in. Two weeks from now, you will be attending Ewing-Halsell Middle School as a seventh grader. This could be a great opportunity for you to make new friends."

"I thought I was already making friends with Newt's kids?"

"Well, it'll be a great opportunity for you to make other new friends. Now get up and get dressed. We're going to head on down to the Walmart Supercenter on 268 S. 7th St. and get everything we need there."

After we got dressed and ate breakfast, we headed out to the Walmart Supercenter on 268 S. 7th St. in Namęšéme's truck. Once there, we quickly made our way inside the mastodonic building. Holy shit, everywhere I could see, there seemed to be stuff on every corner! I had a pretty good feeling there was an aisle dedicated to all sorts of toys, especially Barbies. I'd almost forgotten for a second that we were there for school supplies.

"Alright, now we just need to follow the list," Namęšéme said. "Let's see... what were we supposed to get first? Oh, right, you need a backpack. Today's your lucky day, thunderbird. You get to choose how you'll express yourself to the other students."

I jumped up and down excitedly, ecstatic that I had a choice in the matter. I followed Namęšéme down the aisle where the backpacks were, and to my surprise, there were shelves full of backpacks on either side of me. Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a red and yellow polka-dotted backpack with Minnie Mouse and Daisy Duck on the front. Underneath the two Disney characters was a banner that read, "Best Friends." I knew right then and there that that backpack would be mine, all mine. Almost immediately, I managed to get Namęšéme's attention.

"What is it, Jessica?" Namęšéme asked me amusingly.

I frantically pointed to the backpack of my dreams. "This is it. This is the backpack I want."

"Oh, you want it, eh?" Namęšéme chuckled. "Alright, alright, we'll get it." He grabbed the backpack off the rack for me and placed it into the shopping cart. "Now to find the other things we need..."

And so we just went on like that, finding just about everything I needed for school. This included index cards, a lunch box, Sharpie pens, highlighters, erasers, pencils, and even notebooks. For the lunch box, I had picked out a metallic one with Strawberry Shortcake on the front. Unfortunately, it didn't come with a thermos. When I told Namęšéme about this, he assured me that he would find me one later this week, regardless of whether it would match with my lunch box. After we managed to get every item on the back-to-school shopping list, we were just about to head out to the checkout aisle when we saw Mrs. Richardson waiting in line.

"Hi, Mrs. Richardson!" I called out to her.

Mrs. Richardson quickly turned around to look at me in shock. "Oh my! I didn't expect to see you again until school started!"

"That's okay, Namęšéme and I were just getting stuff for school. What are you doing here?"

Mrs. Richardson couldn't help but smile at me. "Oh... well, one of my daughters is just about your age. She's actually going to be attending the same school you are."

"Really? Neat. What grade is she in?"

"She'll be in seventh grade just like you. I'm just happy I get to spend time with her during and after school."

Namęšéme decided to take over for me from there. "You said you were divorced, right? Are you on friendly terms with each other or has it been messy?"

Mrs. Richardson gave a little bit of a shrug. "Let's just say my ex and I are just friends and leave it at that."

"Ah. Well, I'm just glad you're taking it well. Listen... uh, you seem pretty attractive and, eh, friendly. Do you wanna... go out with me sometime?"

Mrs. Richardson looked at Namęšéme in faint amusement. "You mean like a date or something?"

"Exactly. This could be a great chance for you to start fresh with a new boyfriend."

"Hmm... let me think about it." Mrs. Richardson just stood there, mulling over Namęšéme's dating proposal for just a few seconds. "Sure, that would be swell. Just pick the date and time, and I'm yours."

Namęšéme smiled at her. "Does 8:15 PM on August 15th at my place sound good to you, Arizona?"

"Absolutely, Mr. Traversie. Just give me your address so I know where to go."

"Sure." Namęšéme wrote down our address on a ripped off piece of paper and then handed it to her. "There. Now you know where to go."

"Thank you, Mr. Traversie. Alright, I have to get back to standing in this line."

Namęšéme chuckled. "Me too, actually. Bye bye, Arizona. See you on the 15th."

Mrs. Richardson flirtatiously winked at him. "You too, Mr. Traversie."

I couldn't help but gag during all this. I wasn't too into the idea of a future teacher of mine possibly getting into a relationship with my namshim, especially when she could've easily been Náhko'éehe's age. Still, I'm sure Néške'éehe would have wanted him to move on and find someone else to share his life with. She understood just as well as he did that nobody wants to die alone.