Taking a sip of black coffee, Izuku set himself to work again.
Today's victim was physics. Another worksheet assigned to the class for homework. Caffeine coursed through his veins; the idea of that alone gave him placebic energy.
A sense of urgency trailed Izuku's writing, despite the handaching. There wasn't any need to rush; the weekend had just started, and the work wasn't due until next week.
Best get it out of the way. Then I won't have to think about it.
Izuku's phone buzzed, halting his momentum. With a brief glance, he smiled.
Tokoyami-kun (7:53am)
Good morning, Midoriya. I hope this doesn't wake you.
I found the name of the poem I told you about. In the Final Mists by Yoshihara Kazuo .
Perhaps you'll find it interesting.
Midoriya (7:54am)
Oh hey! You're up early haha.
That's cool! I'll give it a read for sure!
What brings you to the land of early risers anyway? I thought you'd sleep in lol.
Tokoyami-kun (7:54am)
Despite what other shadow entities may tell you. I can wake early when I desire to.
...That being said, I did require setting an alarm.
But nevermind that.
Izuku laughed, and leaned forward with a smile.
Midoriya 7:55am)
Oh, okay then hahaha.
I appreciate the effort regardless :)
Tokoyami didn't respond after that, but Izuku didn't mind. They had started talking more online in the past few days, and lulls in the conversation were frequent. That wasn't a bad thing, it was just how the conversation flowed at times.
Izuku continued his work, but at a tedious question he stopped again.
He grabbed his phone.
Midoriya (7:57am)
So, got any exciting plans for the weekend?
Tokoyami (7:59am)
Nothing in particular. I've yet to decide.
Or should I perhaps say that I plan to work/study hard?
Midoriya (8:00am)
Hey, do what you want!
I'm not the boss of you haha
Tokoyami (8:00am)
Even so, there is some coursework due next week, isn't there?
I suppose I'll be occupied with that as well.
Midoriya (8:00am)
Oh yeah, the physics and math worksheets!
I'm actually working on the physics one now hahaha.
You wanna compare notes?
Tokoyami (8:01am)
I believe the real question is if I'll require your help.
To which, as has often been the case, I will.
Izuku felt himself flush, then frowned. It felt nice to be relied on, to be helpful, but Tokoyami deserved more than self-deprecation.
Midoriya (8:01am)
Don't be so hard on yourself!
At the rate we've been covering material, you probably won't need my help soon haha
Tokoyami (8:02am)
As historic a moment as that would be, I don't see it as so forthcoming.
...What I mean to say is that your help is always appreciated. I would like to continue our studies together.
Izuku shook his head, trying to get rid of the warmth in his cheeks. Tokoyami's words had a way of taking him off guard; whether they were a blunt joke or a heartfelt compliment. Everything he said came through elegantly. That had taken some getting used to, but it grew on him.
Midoriya (8:02am)
Don't worry about it, I'm always glad to help!
If you want, I'm free all day.
Of course, we don't have to just study. We could do other stuff too!
Up to you, though!
Maybe you're busy, and that's totally fine!
Izuku put his phone down, closing his eyes. It wasn't his worst tirade of words, but that was easier to avoid online compared to real social interaction.
Put down the phone. Don't obsess over it.
I'm nearly done with the worksheet. I'll check my phone once I'm done. It'll be like a reward!
God, that sounds desperate, doesn't it?
Izuku continued with his work anyway. Even when the phone finally binged, he willed himself to finish the sheet.
After the last desperate stroke, the final solution solved, he checked the response.
Tokoyami (8:05am):
I don't have any plans today. I'd be happy to do whatever you have in mind.
I haven't had breakfast yet. Perhaps we can discuss it downstairs?
Midoriya (8:09am):
Sure! I'm basically done with one of the worksheets so I'm ready to head out :)
Tokoyami (8:10am):
Excellent. I'll be in the hallway shortly.
Smiling, Izuku left his desk to change.
A simple black t-shirt seems like a safe choice. Yes, the weather's warm enough for that. Don't think it'll rain...I hope it won't, at least.
Satisfied with his attire, Izuku resolutely walked out into the corridor.
Tokoyami was already outside his room, leaning on the door frame to his room and looking down on his phone.
"Good morning, Tokoyami-" Izuku stopped. "Woah."
Tokoyami looked up, noticing Izuku's expression. "Is...something the matter?"
"You're...wearing a t-shirt ?" Indeed he was; a dark purple one with a miniature grey skull patterned in the left breast. Izuku didn't recognise the brand.
Tokoyami glanced downwards for an instant then slowly crossed his arms, frowning. "It seems you are as well. I don't see any scandal in that..."
"Yeah, but...I've never seen you with a t-shirt. Let alone a purple one!"
"I have t-shirts!" Tokoyami looked down at himself again. "...Is it really that surprising?"
"Yeah! Not that it looks bad on you, though! I just...didn't expect it. In a good way!"
"I'm sure." Tokoyami said dryly, then looked away. "I suppose it's true that I regularly wear collared shirts, particularly white. Perhaps I needed to broaden my horizons, to truly experience the pedestrian fashion of my contemporaries."
It was sometimes hard to tell when Tokoyami's grandiose language was ironic, poetic, or mere formality. This time, there was an incredibly subtle tinge of humour to his tone with that last sentence; easy to miss to an untrained ear.
Izuku smiled. "Well, it's working. I mean it, it looks good!"
"I..uh, thank you." Tokoyami, slightly abashed, motioned to the stairs. "Shall we head down?"
"Sure."
The mess hall was as loud as expected; Izuku decided that a coffee and bagel was in order, while his classmate opted for porridge and apple juice.
"By the way," Tokoyami sat down. "I saw an episode of that documentary you recommended; the one about the Night Heroes in Osaka."
"Oh yeah?" Midoriya took the opposite seat. "What did you think?"
"It's...fascinating. The narrative was a tad... overdramatized in some parts, but it was informative. I'll certainly watch more of it, when time allows."
"I'm glad." Izuku took a tentative sip of his coffee, still boiling hot. "It's not often I have a good excuse to recommend a hero documentary. I mean, I get that they're boring sometimes, but when it gets to talking about their feats, how they risk life-especially in that Night Hero one where Nyx the Nightshadow takes on that gang who-" Izuku stopped. "You know what I mean…"
"Indeed," Tokoyami nodded, seemingly unfazed by the rant. "I only wonder if I'll have any skill such as hers, or any Night Hero, for that matter."
Izuku smiled. "Hey, I believe in you! Oh, and Dark Shadow, of course!"
Tokoyami gave a pause, but let out a faintly relaxed smile. "And that belief is always appreciated…About that, I have something to..."
His classmate stopped, seeming to reconsider what to say.
Izuku leaned in. "What's up?"
"Ah, it's nothing of concern. I was just pondering…"
"Oh really? Just pondering?"
"Indeed..."
"Are you sure?"
Tokoyami paused before resigning to a sigh. "I was thinking to ask you...a favor, of sorts. It isn't study-related so you're under no obligation to-"
"What is it?" Izuku realized in his excitement that most of his body was leaning over the table at this point. That didn't stop his resolve. "Whatever it is I won't mind!"
"Very well…." Tokoyami straightened up in his chair. "You...recall our discussion about future career plans?
"Ah yeah, I remember! You were thinking about becoming a Night Hero, right?"
"Just so. But I also mentioned that I needed more training; in particular, there was the matter of... him ."
"HEY! TAKING POT SHOTS AT ME ARE YA?" Dark Shadow yanked himself out of his host, glaring with sharp yellow lights. "SAY ANYMORE AND I'LL SUE FOR DEFAMATION!"
"You...you're worried about keeping control of him in the dark, right?" Izuku asked. Then he understood. "So does that mean you want to…?"
"Yes." Tokoyami nodded bashfully. "I need to train in the dark, practice my endurance and control, so...I'd like to ask for your help, once more. If I could..."
"Tokoyami-kun…" Izuku felt his hands grip with determination. "Of course I'll help! We'll have to figure out precautions, probably, but I know how much this means to you so I'll do whatever I can."
"...You're certain?"
"Yes! Only if you are, of course..."
"As much as I dread the idea, it is my greatest weakness. Grades aside, of course." The dry humour did little to take the edge off his classmate's tone. "It must be done, for myself and…"
...for everyone else. That's what you were going to say, huh?
He cares so much…
Of course he does, he's a hero! But…
What am I thinking? But what?
"We'll figure something out." Izuku shoved his thoughts away so he could think. "We'll need a dark place, but one we can access quickly. Maybe a flashlight? Or is that too weak? And it should be big enough to account for Dark Shadow's increased size…Oh crap, and there's the curfew to consider too...What do you think?"
"I've thought about it a little…" Tokoyami looked down, a pause in his voice. "My room wouldn't be well equipped for it, and removing every glowing object from the room would be tedious. But…"
"You think we should use my room?" Izuku finished. "I don't mind, but...isn't it a bit small? If Dark Shadow got big-"
"I won't let that happen." Tokoyami stated firmly. "I've given it some thought; so long as the environment is peaceful, my emotions should be easy to keep in check. There'll be some agitation, but...If things go poorly, you can turn the lights on."
Izuku gave it some thought, then nodded. "Okay. If you're sure, then let's do it! I trust both of you, and I'll do my best on my end. Don't worry!"
"I won't." Tokoyami said seriously. "Having you there...will certainly help as well. I have my fullest faith in you."
Izuku's heart pounded, just once.
He trusts me...Of course he does, we've been through a lot together. But...why does that feel so special now?
What...what's going on?
"I'm glad." Izuku could feel the room getting warmer. "Well, now that we've decided that, did you want to do something today? I've got nothing planned, though I guess I should do some training. Do you jog a lot, Tokoyami-kun? I know some routes-ah, but I wouldn't want to force you. I don't mind doing something easier going if that's-"
"I...don't mind the idea of some exercise." Tokoyami cut in. "I've never tried jogging, but a new experience couldn't hurt..."
"WAIT, WHAT!?" Dark Shadow, who had been somewhat distracted, interrupted. "YOU'RE ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE YOU EXERCISE? IN BROAD DAYLIGHT? THAT'S RARE!"
"I don't see any problem with it." Tokoyami seemed unfazed by the comment, but his tone lacked security. "I'm no athlete, but physical exertion is no stranger to a hero in training."
"YEAH, BUT DO YOU EVEN HAVE SPORTS CLOTHES?
"I do."
" OTHER THAN SCHOOL UNIFORM?
Tokoyami glanced away from his quirk. "I don't see the point of arguing with you. It's a fruitless endeavor."
"ONLY BECAUSE YOU NEVER WIN!"
"Guys!" Izuku jumped in. It was an amusing spectacle, but he wanted to avoid a diplomatic crisis. "If you want, maybe we can leave right after breakfast? I find runs are easier when it's earlier in the day...Up to you, though!"
"Very well. I welcome the challenge."
"YEAH, I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THIS!"
But...I never said it was a challenge!
Regardless, they finished breakfast quickly and, after returning to their rooms to get changed, headed outside the dorm building.
The morning dew still lingered in the scent of the air, mingling with the faint smog of the distant metropolis. The sun peaked out of grey clouds to provide occasional warmth, but a slight chill lingered. It was fantastic weather for a run.
Izuku decided to take his usual route; a footpath that would send them several blocks away from the school campus, including a scenic walk with views of the beach on one side, skyscrapers on the other. The sea breeze would be perfect for it.
Tokoyami ran alongside him as they departed school grounds. "As loathe as I am to admit it, I must warn you that my stamina...leaves something to be desired."
"Hey, don't worry about it." Izuku replied. "This is mainly for fun, so we can go any pace we want."
"Very well, then…" There was a touch of relief in Tokoyami's response. "Lead the way."
Izuku did so, and while his legs carried him he let his mind wander. Running was one of the few times he could do that.
After the first 15 minutes of the jog, Izuku noticed his classmate starting to slow, with a quiet fastening of breath. Despite his warning, Tokoyami certainly wasn't unfit, but nor was he in the habit of going for long runs. After more time had passed, the fatigue became visible.
"You want to stop for a bit?" Izuku asked, slowing his pace.
Tokoyami shook his head. "I can carry on for longer. Don't mind me…"
"YEAH…." Dark Shadow audibly panted as he emerged from his host (which sparked Izuku's curiosity in how the quirk could pant and why). "WE CAN…..DO THIS….ALL DAY!"
"Really, it's alright!" Izuku rolled his shoulder, it felt tense. "No harm stopping for a bit. And look! We're just about at the beach!"
They came to a broad patch of grass in front of the sand, with a tree that offered shade.
As they sat down, Izuku heard his classmate let out a quiet sigh. "A pleasant view. I've never taken the time to appreciate it. "Come to think of it, I don't think I've been here in broad daylight."
"Oh really?" Izuku smiled at that. "Well, it's definitely one of my favorite places to relax. The smell...I'll never get sick of it."
"I can see the appeal." Tokoyami gazed out to the ocean in front of them. "Perhaps I should...hmm."
"What?"
Tokoyami didn't respond immediately but continued with another sigh. "It's nothing. I was thinking about how little I go out like this. Perhaps I should make an effort to do this more often."
Oh?
"Glad I could take you out then!" Izuku felt himself relax in the mild sun. "There's something about jogging with someone else that's really motivating, we should do this more often!"
"Uh, ah…" Tokoyami made a brief grimace. "Perhaps a little less than often, considering your definition of a jog is much...broader than mine."
"Hey, you were doing fine! It gets easier with practice!"
"So you've said with everything else." Tokoyami replied with a light dryness. "If I were a prodigal child with matters such as study and exercise, I would, perhaps, share your mentality."
"Oh come on…" Izuku smiled, seeing that Tokoyami was doing the same. "I've seen your progress, so you can't downplay yourself like that! Besides, there's probably a lot of things you can do better than me, I bet!"
"Compliments notwithstanding, I'm inclined to disagree."
"See? I could never talk as fancy as you do!"
"And you are, probably, the only person to envy me for it."
"It's cool! I mean it!"
"Honestly…" Tokoyami let out an exasperated breath. "In all seriousness, do you believe I'm truly improving? I suppose it's not very obvious from my position…"
"I mean it." Izuku nodded resolutely. "By the time exams come around, you'll see it too."
"Your confidence is remarkable, but...thank you."
At that moment, Tokoyami turned to Izuku. When they matched eyes he let out one of his rare smiles. It wasn't cool or calculated, nor did it contain any pride or ego. It was a smile that leaked kind satisfaction.
"Tokoyami-kun…"
His friend's face reverted to the same stoic expression. "About tonight-or well, about training my control with Dark Shadow, I had a thought."
"Oh yeah?"
"It's...well, I doubt it would make much difference, but for safety's sake it couldn't hurt to try it…"
"IF YOU'RE NOT GONNA SAY IT, I WILL!" Dark Shadow's head emerged, slightly, out of Tokoyami's stomach. The quirk was clearly excited.
"No! I-" Tokoyami shook his head. "I was thinking...perhaps we could do some sparring?"
Sparring?!
"It doesn't have to be strictly intense," Tokoyami went on. "But it would have to be enough to genuinely tire myself and Dark Shadow out."
"That's...that could work, I think." Izuku let the idea stir in his mind. "Yeah, there's no reason why stamina wouldn't affect both you and Dark Shadow. I find exercise tends to calm me down, so it makes sense. We should try it!"
"You agree?" Relief echoed in Tokoyami's tone. "I don't wish to take any time out of your day…"
"Hey it's a weekend, and it'd be good training anyway. We haven't sparred a lot together, have we?"
"I suppose not. We'd have to set rules, not to mention the logistics of setting up a time and place…"
"Well, if we do it early, we can probably find space on the school grounds, near the gym. We shouldn't have to worry too much about the curfew then…"
"Very well. Then let's arrange something for this late afternoon."
"Okay!" Izuku smiled, feeling excited. "Guess we have some time to kill before then. Anything you want to do today?"
"You're asking me to choose?"
"Well, why not?"
"No reason, I just...I don't have any ideas."
"Oh, well neither did I." Izuku laughed. "Guess that's why I asked you."
"Fair enough." A smirk flashed in Tokoyami's face, which slowly turned into an epiphany. "Ah, perhaps I do have an idea..."
The morning market stalls had a greater variety of cuisines this week, not that Fumikage went to them often enough to be sure of that fact. Breakfast hadn't been too substantial, and the exercise left him with an eager hunger.
"Smells good today.." Midoriya says. "Good thing I brought my wallet!"
Fumikage patted his pockets. Good, he didn't forget his wallet either; he couldn't stand the idea of asking his classmate to borrow any money.
"You know, it's been a while since I've had market food." Midoriya then laughs. "I keep forgetting they do weekly stalls here, and when I finally remember it's normally too late…"
That's...not what I would have guessed. Midoriya being forgetful?
"I've been to this one once or twice before." Fumikage comments. "I can't speak for all the stands, but I could recommend a yakisoba stand, or if you're so inclined, there should be a crepe shop nearby…"
"Tough decision…" Midoriya mulls. "I guess it's nearly lunchtime, so maybe we should start savoury…"
They entered the main alley of stalls with no particular plan in mind. It didn't take long before Midoriya pointed out one selling yakitori skewers.
YESSSS CLASSIC OPENING SNACK!
Midoriya asked for two skewers, and before Fumikage could stop his classmate he paid for both.
Drat!
"You didn't have to pay for mine." Fumikage said simply.
Midoriya shrugged lightly. "Nah, don't worry about it! It didn't cost much anyway..."
HE HAS A POINT, YOU KNOW!
But it's the principle!
OH COME ON, CAN'T YOU LET PEOPLE TREAT US FOR ONCE?
Whatever. I'll be sure to pay for the next thing we find….
And so, when they passed by a vendor peddling cold drinks, Fumikage asked for two bottles of Ramune. When he passed the bottle to Midoriya, he could swear he saw a glint of something in his eyes.
If Fumikage didn't know any better, he would've sworn it was a competitive glint.
Then they came to one of the many yakisoba stands.
Midoriya made the first move. "You want something? My treat."
"Oh, but I must insist on getting this," Fumikage replied, making his tone smooth. "Think of it as a small payment for helping my studies…"
"I couldn't let you do that!" Midoriya's voice was earnest but firm. "I told you before, I enjoy our study sessions, so maybe I should be paying you!"
"Well if you wish to be circular about it then-"
"And all that aside, I want to treat you because you're my friend and I'm enjoying spending this time with you! It's as simple as that!"
I…
WOW, EVEN I'M SPEECHLESS! NOT THAT YOU'D LET ME SPEAK, BUT STILL!
"I could turn that argument right back to you, you know…" Fumikage let himself mumble. "But very well. I'll have a beef yakisoba."
I definitely saw a crepe shop around here. I'll make sure to get some for both of us, and then we'll be even.
It was ridiculous, the back and forth paying for one another's food; Fumikage knew that. Such a trade produced little net value, and it was, essentially, posturing.
And yet, something about the ritual felt meaningful. Whatever Fumikage felt about his friend paying for food, it was a nice thing to do. A kindness for a kindness, a pattern with messy, but ultimately noble intentions.
What a game we play, for the sake of appearances…Or perhaps, for honour?
They found a short table, seated with even shorter plastic boxes, off at the end of the market row. It blended in with the urban scene, plain and efficient.
"Seems busier than usual this week…" Midoriya commented. "Wonder if there's an event going on…"
"Hmm." Fumikage murmured non-committedly as he eyed the crowds around them. "Good fortune that we found some seats..."
My feet are killing me…
IT'S YOUR FAULT FOR RUNNING SO MUCH! THIS IS WHY WE BARELY EXERCISE! YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER!
They dove into their food. Fumikage didn't regret his choice of meal, and from the way Midoriya's face relaxed into contented ease, neither did he.
Reminds me of the rice bowl place Midoriya took us…
YOU'RE NOT STILL FEELING BAD ABOUT THAT, ARE YOU?
No, of course not. But...it's true that I need to broaden my horizons. Heavens, when was the last time I had food from a street market?
I KEEP TELLING YOU, YOU NEED TO GO OUT MORE! TRY NEW THINGS!
You also seem prone to telling me not to exercise. Do you see the contradiction? The hypocrisy?
UH…NOPE!
Figures…
When the plastic containers of yakisoba were picked clean and thrown away, they continued their conquest. As each cheap snack was devoured, Fumikage became more and more conscious of his wallet lightening.
WORTH IT!
I...suppose so.
Fumikage wouldn't call himself a frugal person: medieval memorabilia wasn't exactly cheap after all, but he avoided overindulgence where he could. The snacks, however, didn't feel like a wasteful expense.
THE MORE MONEY YOU SPEND, THE MORE TIME WITH IZU-KUN RIGHT?
I don't know what you're talking about.
UH HUH. YEAH, SURE...
Except by now, even Fumikage knew that he was in denial. Time with Midoriya felt valuable; and if there was a chance to maximize it, he would take it.
And that need for time, Fumikage realized with horror, came from a place of desire. He didn't want to admit it, but he knew ignoring it was an even greater cowardice.
OH MY GOD, FINALLY! ARE YOU GONNA ADMIT IT?
I…admit what?
DO I EVEN HAVE TO SAY IT?
Tokoyami took a moment to look at Izuku, then at the azure sky. He took a deep breath.
….No. No, you don't.
Fumikage dared a look at the classmate eating a takoyaki skewer by his side. The sudden heave in his chest confirmed everything.
I...I can't let him know.
AND WHY NOT?
It would…it would risk everything...
AREN'T THE BEST RISKS LIKE THAT?
That would be profound if it wasn't completely insane.
I MEAN, SURE, IT DIDN'T WORK THAT ONE TIME, BUT-
Stop. Bringing that up….is that really supposed to motivate me?
ALRIGHT, MY BAD! BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!
Fumikage shook himself, playing it off as a cold shudder. He focussed his expression; keeping it still had never been so difficult.
Midoriya noticed, because of course he did. "You alright?"
"Yes. Just a tad cold..." Fumikage replied, ignoring the slight tremor in his tone. Then his salvation appeared in front of him, in bright white and pink colors. "Ah, there's the crepe stall."
"Oooh! Yeah, let's go!" Midoriya, curse him, was charming in his excitement.
There was a dreadfully long line, but that allowed time for Fumikage to calm down.
Whatever happens, we'll remain friends. I know that. Midoriya...is not the type to let such things go easily.
EXACTLY! SO NOTHING TO LOSE, RIGHT?
Only my pride…
AND WHEN HAS THAT EVER BEEN IMPORTANT?
How long had it been since Fumikage had to deal with such a dilemma? It had been years since his last unrequited affections, and that still stung even after years.
When they finally reached the front, Fumikage upheld his self-made promise, paying for both of their crepes after another fierce battle of niceties. They walked on, approach the end of the market street.
"Man, it's been ages since I had one of these…" Midoriya raised his crepe with a smile. "Bon appetit! Haha…"
Fumikage could only nod, as he suppressed the warmth in his face.
Damn him! Does he realise how...
HOW DAMN CUTE HE IS? NO, I DON'T THINK HE DOES!
And strangely, it felt good to admit that to himself. Perhaps it was the chocolate sugar improving his mood-Fumikage hadn't realized he had such a sweet tooth before-but there was more to it than that.
I suppose there's no use in denial, at this point.
YESSS EMBRACE THE DARKNESS! IT FEELS GOOD, DOESN'T IT? BEING HONEST WITH YOURSELF?
Perhaps, but don't expect me to share in your vulgarity.
SURE SURE! ONE OF US HAS TO BE THE BORING ONE, I GET IT!
Fumikage, only slightly irked, suppressed a faint smirk at himself.
Indeed.
They found a bench outside of the market, with a decent view of the beach, yet again. The two of them sat down; Fumikage noted their closeness.
"Okay, I think that's my food limit for the day. Or maybe even the week!" Midoriya laughed with a contented smile. "But seriously, that was a good idea!"
"I'm glad it worked out." Fumikage let himself smile back. "As guilty as I feel for the indulgence, I'm sure we can forgive ourselves, no?"
"Yeah, exactly!" Midoriya leaned back. Fumikage had never seen his classmate look so...relaxed. "Thanks for coming out with me, Tokoyami-kun. I...I really enjoyed that."
"Likewise." Fumikage stared at the sea, trying to come up with something more engaging to say. His emotions boiled inside of him, and none of the right words found him. For all the fancy words he liked to use, Fumikage could never come up with the right thing to say.
So they sat there, in contemplative quiet. Fumikage closed his eyes. He heard the breeze, smelled the sea, and felt the warmth of the sun and the company.
I...I haven't been honest with myself at all, have I?
Dark Shadow, despite the opportunity, didn't comment.
No, I haven't. But why? Why was I so ashamed of myself? Ashamed of my feelings?
It's a terrifying sensation, but...how could I be ashamed of my feelings?
How could I ever be ashamed for liking someone like Izuku Midoriya?
The classmate in question let out a contented sigh. It seemed he was happy to relax next to him. Such a little thing meant the world to Fumikage.
No matter my feelings. No matter how he feels about me...I hope we can continue being friends.
No, more than that; I hope he can rely on me, as I know I can rely on him.
Yes, that would be enough, I think. This, right now...is enough.
The moment of pure bliss passed as smoothly as it came when Midoriya sat up. "So...you ready to head back?"
Fumikage opened his eyes, awoken from the dream. "Yes, perhaps we should."
Midoriya nodded, standing up. "Looks like it's gonna be late soon. You still wanna do some sparring?"
"...Yes." Fumikage looked at the sun, which was steadily close to the horizon. "There should be enough time, I think..."
"Cool, then let's go!"
"Wait are you going to-"
Midoriya took off in another jog. He didn't even glance behind to see if Fumikage was following. The audacity.
THE THINGS WE DO FOR LOVE, EH?
Quiet, you.
Fumikage, not for the first time, ran after his friend.
The sky became a shade more orange by the time they reached the field to spar, and a moment later they were changed and ready.
For a second, Izuku felt nervous. For all his training, he could never shake the performance anxiety just before a fight, sparring or otherwise.
"Alright!" Izuku called. "You ready?"
Tokoyami finished stretching and let out a calm breath. "I suppose so. Do you want to attack first, or shall I?"
Izuku considered. "You go first. That's probably the best way to work out energy, right?"
Tokoyami nodded at this. "Very well."
In an instant, Tokoyami became his opponent; his stance and expression shifted, his demeanor becoming one of focused hostility.
Alright. Izuku made a defence stance accordingly. Whatever happens, I have to be careful not to go overboard. At the same time, I gotta make sure I don't get-
Dark Shadow's claws rushed Izuku with tremendous speed. Instinct barely saved him from being scratched, as he leaped back.
Right. Tokoyami-kun has a decent range. And that speed….he's improved.
Izuku dodged another volley of swipes, this time more deftly, but the attacks continued.
Soon enough, Tokoyami landed a hit, but it wasn't as rough as Izuku anticipated. From that, Izuku sensed that Tokoyami was holding back; even with the sunlight present he was usually faster.
"Hey," Izuku called out once there was a pause in the fight. "How're you feeling? Do you want to attack harder?"
Tokoyami relaxed his pose only slightly. "I...can do it. Only if you want to."
Despite the situation, that hesitation warmed Izuku. "Don't worry I can take it."
Can I?
Tokoyami appeared to believe his exaggerated confidence, so he nodded. "Alright. Let us continue…"
They both nodded, and so the sparring resumed.
Tokoyami's assault had much more speed now, the intensity of Dark Shadow's silhouette grew larger, sharper, more menacing. Izuku barely had time to dodge each claw, but he kept his distance well.
If I really wanted to defend myself, I'd get up close. Attack his weaknesses. But that's not really the point of this exercise. No, I'm supposed to tire him out...
Instead, Izuku focussed on his positioning, ignoring any openings that Tokoyami offered and maintaining distance.
Seeing Tokoyami in a fight was always a marvel, but being on the business end of his quirk was a whole new experience to Izuku. His classmate fought not merely with passion, but a certain...finesse. While Dark Shadow made most of the attacks, Tokoyami still moved quickly, allowing for his Quirk to reach each point of attack.
When Izuku caught a glance of Tokoyami's eyes, he saw a stern ferocity-a level of emotion he never saw in their everyday interactions.
At that moment, Izuku knew that wanted to see that raw emotion more. Not just the reserved elegance Tokoyami always gave away, but the real heart of his emotions, thoughts, and ambitions.
Is this...how Tokoyami-kun really feels? Is this the real him?
I mean, there's a lot I didn't know about him until recently. Maybe I never noticed until now...
Izuku's train of thought then steered in a new direction. The conversation he overheard with Tokoyami and the others in the locker room was stuck in his mind. Then, even more prominently, was their heart to heart the other night.
Tokoyami-kun...he likes guys, right? He didn't say that outright, but it was heavily implied…
I mean, he definitely said "he", so...yeah, he likes guys.
So I guess he does have a type after all? That's fine, but I wonder…
...
What am I wondering?
….
Would I be his type?
…
Do I... want to be his type?
I…
I mean, he's a great guy! One of the coolest people I've ever met, and he's definitely sincere...Kirishima-kun's right, anyone- any guy would be lucky to have him.
I definitely enjoy spending time with him…
And I feel like I could tell him anything…
Well, almost anything…
I know I can trust him, but….
Well, maybe one day I could…I don't know...
Regardless, he's my friend. I wanna get to know him more.
I think...I want to get closer to him.
But is that as a friend, or something more?
Could I imagine being...his boyfriend?
Crap, that in itself is crazy! I've never dated anyone before, so a label like that would need some getting used to…Boyfriend….that sounds weird, doesn't it?
Is that what I want?
What do I want?
More importantly, am I really having a romantic crisis in the middle of a goddamn spar? With the guy that's causing it?
I guess so.
But that's normal for teenagers, isn't it?
Well, hero-trainee teenagers, at least.
Okay, I should set this out logically.
I like girls, that's for sure, but...I guess guys have always looked nice to me too, huh? In a different way, but definitely not bad…
I guess...it doesn't really make a difference to me if they're a guy or a girl. I mean, if we're talking about love, it doesn't change things, does it?
And Tokoyami-kun...there's definitely something about him. He's...really cool, but it's not just that.
What is it?
His eyes, I think. I feel like they can see through me, but I don't mind that at all.
His voice...it's so deep, and he speaks so neatly...
And I don't think I'd mind his feathers, no matter what he thinks. He seems insecure about them, but...they suit him.
That being said..with his beak, how would we even-?
AHHHH WHAT THE HELL AM I THINKING!
I can't just assume any of this will happen! Am I really that full of myself?
Not to mention how creepy I sound!
Well, I only said it in my head, so it's fine!
I'll keep it to myself...No one has to know.
Just another secret to keep, right?
But...that settles it, then.
Yeah...I think I've caught feelings….
I like Tokoyami-kun.
Maybe a lot.
...Crap.
Izuku let his arms drop to his side.
Unfortunately, he had forgotten to call for a pause in the fight, and Dark Shadow tackled him with swift brutality. The next thing he knew, he was on the ground several meters away from where he had been standing. It was a rough landing.
"Wait, stop!" Tokoyami called, panic in his voice. Dark Shadow retreated immediately. "Midoriya, are you alright?"
"Yeah, I'm fine..." Izuku stared at the sky, then sat up. "Sorry, I was a little out of it…I forgot to block."
Tokoyami was over at his side quickly. He offered a hand. "I...didn't expect the opening, but I suppose it's an easy enough mistake. I hope I didn't hit you too hard."
"It was a solid hit, but I'm alright!" Izuku definitely felt the bruises, but he shrugged, taking his friend's hand. It felt rough, firm, secure. "D-Did you wanna keep going?"
Tokoyami seemed to consider, but then let out a sigh. "While this has been thrilling, I must confess my exhaustion. I really must work on my stamina more..."
"Hey, no! That's fair enough! I'm feeling a bit tired too actually..."
I...I don't think I'd be able to focus on sparring anyway…
"PHEWWWW!" Dark Shadow crowed, becoming much smaller in size now. "THANK GOD, I'M POOPED! GOOD FIGHTING, IZU-KUN!"
"You too, Dark Shad- wait what?" Izuku shook his head. "Did you just call me-"
"For heaven's sake!" Tokoyami pushed his quirk before it could say anymore. "Please ignore him... "
Izu-kun. Huh...It's kinda cutesy but...I don't mind it.
It's actually kinda sweet.
Izuku laughed. "It's alright! Definitely not the worst nickname I've heard…If he wants to call me that, I don't mind!"
Tokoyami stared. "You...Do you realize what you've done?"
"Huh? What do you mean?"
"IZUUUUUUUU-KUN!" Dark Shadow cackled as he lurched out of his host once again. "AHAHAHA! I TOLD YOU HE'D LIKE IT! JUST BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T THINK OF IT!"
"For heavens-" Tokoyami shook his head, turning to Izuku. "Nevermind. Shall we call it a day then?"
Izuku couldn't stop smiling, but he let the matter drop anyway. "Yeah, sure!"
By the time they changed out of their gear, the sunlight had dimmed into a faded orange. It was beautiful outside, perfect for walking.
Izuku sighed. "That was really fun, actually. I've seen you fight before, but…Properly fighting with you is something else…"
Tokoyami shook his head. "Please. If you had been the aggressor, I'd be the one on the ground. And far sooner too."
Modesty always looked good on him. "Nah, you always had a solid defence. That is, when you don't focus entirely on attacking. I guess it's hard to do both if you can only control one entity and-" Izuku cringed. "Sorry, that was rude, wasn't it? I didn't mean-"
"No, you make a good point." Tokoyami nodded. "It's certainly easier to do one thing at a time. When I try to multi-task with Dark Shadow I...I feel...stretched out, I suppose."
"IT FRICKIN' HURTSSSS!" Dark Shadow added. "I CAN ONLY GET SO BIG! I'M NOT MADE OUT OF GUM, YOU KNOW!
"Makes sense." It was fascinating. "Still, even with limitations there's still a lot of versatility, and you really utilize it."
"From you, that's very high praise." Tokoyami let out a smile. "I...thank you, Izu- ah, Midoriya, I mean. Thank you, Midoriya."
Izuku's face spiked in temperature, and he knew it wasn't the heat. That excuse was worthless now. Hearing his name, even partially, from his classmate's voice, was…
God, I'm hopeless.
"My apologies," Tokoyami cleared his throat. "I don't know why I-"
"T-That's okay! I really don't mind!"
"You...don't mind?"
"Uh, well, yeah!"
"Meaning...Do you want me to-?"
"Ah, well you don't have to. Like you shouldn't feel pressured to-"
"No." Tokoyami's voice took on a firm resolve. "I want to. But...do you want me to?"
Izuku felt a crushing excitement, but he forced out the words. "Yeah, I do."
"V-very well, then." Tokoyami took a breath in. "I shall call you 'Izuku', then. Of course, you're welcome to call me by my given name as well, if you like."
This is so awkward….but I'm also really happy? Is this really happening?
"FUMI-CHAN, DUMMYKAGE, AND FUFU ARE ALSO ACCEPTABLE!" Dark Shadow cut in.
Tokoyami gave his quirk a fierce glare. "They most certainly are not. Least of all from you."
"AH WHATEVER, YOU JUST DON'T APPRECIATE ARTISTIC LICENSE!"
"Fumikage-kun…" Izuku let himself say. That would take some getting used to. "I guess we should be getting back? It's getting close to dinner…"
"Ah, of course." Fumikage replied. "After dinner, do you want to…"
"Yeah, we can head up to my room." Izuku said it almost immediately. "So you're feeling up to it?"
"I...I don't know if I am." Fumikage shook his head. "But that's why it needs to be done. Whatever happens, I trust that I can control things, at least."
"Right, of course." Izuku nodded. "And if anything goes wrong-"
"I'll let you know. I understand."
Izuku sensed a nervous tinge in his friend's voice but didn't mention it.
The dormitory dinner was mediocre by its own standards, but perfectly fine. Stir fry on rice didn't excite Izuku, and he hardly had room for much after all the stall food he ate. Neither of them ate much, so they got through their meals quickly.
As they ate, however, Izuku couldn't help but sneak glances as his friend. Each look confirmed his feelings more.
This is already awkward….I need to get my head straight.
Within the hour, they were already heading back upstairs. Soon enough, Izuku unlocked his door and motioned his classmate in.
In my room….God, he probably thinks it's too corny-with all the All-Might posters, but he's too nice to say anything, huh? But for some reason he wants to be here, with me. Just the two of us. There's nothing weird about that! Stop thinking about things like that!
Keep it together!
"Sorry for the mess…" Izuku mumbled as he moved to his desk, notes and textbooks scattered everywhere. "I should make a habit to tidy up after studying…"
"You could hardly do worse than mine…" Fumikage replied.
Izuku noted the nervous tinge to his friend's voice. "You alright? We can always-"
"No." Fumikage said firmly, almost desperate. He softened his stance. "No...I'll be alright. But I appreciate the concern…"
"Of course." Izuku smiled, feeling a tense eagerness to begin. If Fumikage-kun needed help, he would be there. "So...where do you wanna sit?"
Fumikage elected to sit on the floor. He rested on a cushion; something Midoriya thought to bring for one of their study sessions.
"You ready?" Midoriya asked. He stood by the door next to the light switch.
"Alright," Midoriya looked resolute, much more so than Fumikage felt. "I'll count down from three, then turn off the light…"
"You don't need to countdown." Fumikage didn't want to prolong it any longer than need be. He was anxious enough. "Just...do it."
"Oh! Uh, okay." Midoriya turned to the switch but hesitated. "Okay, but should we have...I don't know, a safe word?"
SAFE WORD? PAHAHAHAHA!
Not now.
"Is...wouldn't 'stop' suffice?" Fumikage asked.
"Well, sure, but….I won't know if you're talking to me, or yourself, or...you know…"
He's thought this through.
"I...suppose that's a good point." Fumikage let out a breath. "Very well...how about-"
"HOT YUMMY CREPES!" Dark Shadow cried out.
Fumikage blinked, turning to his Quirk. "You're not serious…"
"COME ON! IT'S NOT LIKE YOU EVER USE THE WORD 'YUMMY', AND THOSE FESTIVAL CREPES REALLY MADE ME HAPPY SO….MAYBE THAT'LL CALM ME DOWN? I DUNNO!"
Izuku laughed lightly. "Not exactly a word, and more a phrase, but...I guess that works! It definitely stands out!"
Why is he so inclined to your ludicrosity?
BECAUSE HE'S COOL, REMEMBER?
"For heaven's sake…" Fumikage sighed. "I suppose...we'll use that. Light hope I won't need to..."
Even though I certainly will.
"Okay, I guess that's all I was worried about." Izuku looked at Fumikage with a fiercely loyal gaze. "If anything goes wrong, even if you think you can handle it…"
"Hot yummy crepes, I understand." Fumikage nodded, his will steeled somehow by that gaze.
"Alright, here goes…" Fumikage watched his friend's hand move to the light switch. Time almost slowed down at that moment.
Then it went black.
Fumikage wasn't a stranger to training his endurance in the dark, but that didn't lessen the dread he felt when he entered it. That stab of panic, unease, and most worryingly, excitement always made him gasp.
OOOOOH HA HA! GOD, IT'S BEEN A WHILE.
That didn't sound like Dark Shadow's voice, it never did, but Fumikage knew it was him. Nothing was more obvious than the fact that it was him.
I FEEL SO….FREE! I DON'T GET IT, WHY DON'T WE DO THIS MORE OFTEN?
Shut up-
NO, REALLY. WHY? LIKE I GET IT, WE GOTTA LIVE A DAY LIFE, BE A GOOD STUUUUUDENT. BUT WHY DO WE DO THAT? WHAT'S THE POINT?
Fumikage shook his head, keeping his breathing steady.
I'm not answering that. You never listen.
OH, BUT I DOOOOOOO LISTEN! I LISTEN TO YOU ALL THE TIME! IN FACT, I HAVE TO LISTEN TO EVERY GOD DAMN WORD YOU SAY. EVERYDAY! TWENTY-FOUR FUCCCCCCKIN' SEVEN!
Fumikage hated it when he swore, but he tried to push down his temper.
I'm afraid the burden's mutual. Complaining about it changes nothing.
THEN WHY DO YOU COMPLAIN ABOUT ME, HUH? IS THAT FAIR? TELL ME!
Fumikage had no answer. He never did when Dark Shadow was like this. How do you argue against something that knows everything about you?
YOU HATE IT, YOU HATE ME! THAT'S NOTHING NEW.
I…
OH COME ONNNNNNNNN. YOU CAN'T LIE TO ME, REMEMBER?
I don't...I…
I don't...hate you. I just...you never want to help me!
OH? AND WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK I'VE BEEN DOING?
YOU LOOOOOOOOVE TO ACT LIKE I'M SOME HUGE BURDEN; A PAIN IN THE ASS, BUT GUESS WHAT? WITHOUT ME, YOU AIN'T SHIT! I GIVE YOU SO MUCH POWER AND YOU LIKE IT!
Not this...not this again….
YOU CRAVE IT AND THAT'S BECAUSE IT MAKES YOU STRONG, BUT EVEN MORE THAN THAT: IT MAKES YOU WORTH SOMETHING.
WITHOUT ME,
WHAT ARE YOU?
Fumikage had had this debate countless times, during sleepless nights and anxious episodes. He never had the right answer, there was no solution to be found. It was hopeless. It was always hopeless.
YOU KNOW WHAT I CAN DO. IF I WANTED, I COULD FLIP THIS ROOM, THIS ENTIRE BUILDING! WE COULD BEAT ANYTHING IN OUR WAY!
You wouldn't.
BUT I COULD! AND IT'D BE SOOOOOO EASY!
Not with our classmates here, not with Mid-not with Izuku. You'd hurt them. Hurt him..
For a second, the oppressive grasp his quirk had on his spirit lessened, its hostility faded. The hesitation was there.
At that moment Fumikage realized, even at his worst, that it was a line that Dark Shadow wouldn't cross. It was a small revelation and a comfort to him.
But then the choking atmosphere returned.
LET'S TALK ABOUT IZUKU, THEN. SHALL WE?
No….
OOOH YESSSS. HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN SINCE YOU REALISED YA LIKED HIM? WHEN DID IT START?
I don't need to justify myself to you-
HMMMMMM MAYBE AT THE SPORTS FESTIVAL? IT WAS NICE TO BE NOTICED, HUH? TO BE CHOSEN! NOT TO MENTION THAT YOU COULD RIDE ON HIS COATTAILS TO THE FINALS! MUST'VE BEEN NICE!
That's...we all worked for that! Of course, Izuku especially, but….
PERHAPS! I SUPPOSE THE TASTE OF VICTORY WASN'T THE MAIN REASON YOU ACCEPTED HIS OFFER THOUGH, RIIIIIIIIGHT?
I….
Fumikage remembered the tap on his shoulder. The determined, hopeful face that wanted his help. He felt heroic when he said yes. He felt wanted, appreciated.
He needed me...he asked me to be his teammate. I wanted to help him, so I helped him. It felt...fantastic.
MMMM YEP, IT DEFINITELY FELT GOOD ALRIGHT! BUT HEY, WHO KNOWS HOW MUCH MORE YOU COULD HELP HIM IF YOU JUST-
I'm not letting go. We're not ready for that. Besides, Izuku-san hardly needs our help anyway.
GUESS NOT, BUT HE LIKES STRONG HEROES, DOESN'T HE?
Whatever…
AND YOU LIKE HIM, RIGHT? RIGHT?
We've been over this. We don't need to-
NO, I THINK WE DO! YOU LIKE HIM, AND FOR SOME REASON YOU DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT! YOU DON'T HATE LIKING HIM, DO YOU?
I….no, I don't.
THEN WHY?
I…I…
YOU WHAT? WHAT THE HELL IS IT?
I don't want to be hurt again!
I don't want to be any more different to him than I am now!
You know how I look. I know how I look. Even if he liked men, what difference would it make?
OOOOH, I SEE. YOU THINK HE'S SUPERFICIAL, THEN?
I...god damn it! No, I don't….But….He…
He's so much more than me. He could do so much better.
MAYBE.
And yet...I've taken so much from him, but he never seems bothered. Why?
WHY, INDEED?
Fumikage felt the tears coming out. He groaned at the emotional weight.
He doesn't need me. I'm the one that's using him….
HMM.
The overwhelming presence continued, and Fumikage knew he was spiraling at this point. Yet he couldn't stop thinking.
I'm a useless fool….I don't want to be useless…
CALLING YOURSELF USELESS DOESN'T MAKE YOU BETTER, YOU KNOW….
I know. God damn it, I know!
JUST LET GO. I CAN MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER. YOU KNOW I CAN.
No…
DO IT. DON'T YOU WANT TO BE WORTH SOMETHING?
DON'T YOU WANT TO BE LOVED?
YOU COULD NEVER DO ANYTHING ON YOUR OWN.
SO LET ME OUT!
LET ME OUT!
LET
ME
LET
ME
LET
ME
Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
I can't do this anymore...I can't...
I need….this to stop…
What were….what were the words? The words. I need to...
"Hot….Yummy…" Fumikage shouted each word slowly, carefully. He hoped to all gods that it sounded clear. He couldn't hear anything anymore. Everything was too loud.
Before he could start saying the last word, light returned to the world.
"Fumikage-kun!"
It was like leaping into a freezing pond, the shock of being brought back into the brightness made Fumikage gasp once again. Dark Shadow's shriek was painful, but it faded as quickly as it appeared.
"Fumikage-kun!" Izuku repeated, worry bled into his words. "Are you alright-oh…"
He had seen everything, Tokoyami knew that.
"I'm sorry…" Fumikage couldn't stop weeping, but he didn't care. He was so tired of hiding. "I'm sorry….I can't-"
Kind hands firmly gripped his shoulders. "Hey, hey...It's alright. Everything's okay. I'm here."
Izuku. Izuku was here.
"You...you are." Fumikage looked up to meet those eyes. Evergreen. "Izuku, I…"
I'm sorry.
"God, I'm sorry I didn't do anything sooner!" Izuku's worry bled through his words. "I saw you struggling, but I didn't think-I should've turned on the lights early. I was so stupid! I shouldn't have-"
Fumikage embraced his classmate, his friend. He held on tight, securely. He needed to stay close to him. Appearances be damned.
Don't leave...Please don't leave.
I need you. No, I…
"I love you." Fumikage whispered into his shoulder, but he'd said it too quietly to be heard. Louder, he said. "Shut up. You did everything right…"
"But…" Izuku stopped. He returned the embrace and they held each other. "Are you okay ?"
I...can't lie to you anymore. I don't want to.
"I...no, I'm not. But...you're here now. I'll be okay."
He heard Izuku choke back a breath. He was crying as well. "Heh, all I did was turn on the light..."
You're my light, Izuku.
UUUGHHHHH CORNY, MUCH?
Yeah, I suppose so. I don't care anymore. Say whatever you like.
That surprised the Quirk.
HUH, GUESS YOU REALLY DON'T CARE. THAT'S NEW!
Not now. Please.
RIGHT, OKAY….SEE YA THEN.
Fumikage felt the peace. His Quirk, now exhausted, no longer tried to reign his saddle. It was freeing.
"You've done so much more than that…" Fumikage replied, taking deliberate slow breaths to calm himself. "You...you're special ."
"I…" Izuku let out a small laugh. "I-I mean, aren't we all, technically?"
He...he doesn't believe it. How can he be so dense now, of all times?
"Izuku… " Pulling back, Fumikage wiped his face so he could get a better look at his friend. "You're special...to me. I..."
Izuku stared back, blinking back his own tears. A look of confusion, uncertainty, and finally joy crossed his eyes. His hand moved, slowly, to caress the side of Fumikage's face; fingers stroking his feathers.
"I-I'm not exactly sure what you're trying to say, but…" Izuku smiled tentatively. "If it's what I'm thinking-and please correct me if I'm wrong, then yeah, you're special to me too."
This...this isn't real, could it be?
But...he's right here, and so am I...
Without thinking, Fumikage moved a hand to touch Izuku's face, copying his motion. Soft skin trailed beneath his fingers. "I...I want to be there for you, like you've been there for me. But it's not just that….I want...I want to know you better. Understand you better…"
I'm explaining it poorly, aren't I?
"I want you to mean even more to me than you do now." Fumikage finished. "If...if that makes sense."
Izuku let out a heavy breath, tears brimmed his eyes. "Fumikage-kun…"
Now it was Fumikage's turn to feel the surprise of a crushing embrace. He didn't mind the strength of it; it made his spirit soar, his heart gliding over the horizon.
He returned the hug, and slowly nuzzled his face into Izuku's neck. He needed to be closer.
"I've...I've never done this before…." Izuku whispered.
"Could have fooled me…"
"No, trust me, I haven't. And I, uh, don't really know what I'm doing…" Izuku hugged him tighter. "But I wanna try this. I want to see where this goes..."
"Me as well." Fumikage laughed a little. "I suppose...we'll take time to figure it out...together?"
He felt Izuku nod into his neck. "Yeah...together."
Slowly, Izuku pulled away. He stared at Fumikage and considered. "Wait, I wanna try something."
"Hmm?" Fumikage raised a brow, but excitement spiked inside him.
Holding Fumikage's hand, Izuku moved them to sit on his bed. It took a few seconds of further contemplation for Izuku to continue. He let out a nervous breath. "I...can I...uh, kiss you?"
Oh...
This is...happening.
"Uh...well…I..." Fumikage started, fumbling his words and thoughts together.
"Oh no, sorry! We don't have to do that yet, or at all if you don't want to! Or...if you wanna go slow-"
"No!" Fumikage almost shouted. "I mean...I'd like that. But...you know…"
Fumikage gestured to himself, emphasising his face. As if by reflex, Izuku moved his hand towards his beak.
"I...I guess the mechanics might be different." Izuku tilted his head a little. "But I could...no, maybe...ah….screw it!"
In a second, Izuku kissed him. On the top of his beak, a sudden bullet of warmth hit him. It was rushed, poorly thought out, and clumsily loved it.
"Wow…" Fumikage breathed out. The shock of that moment would linger with him all night. "That was...a good attempt, I think."
If only I could kiss you the same way...
"Yeah?" Izuku chuckled, less nervous now. "Guess that's another thing we can practice together, huh?"
Fumikage blinked. "Good god, are you really referencing our studies? Now?"
"Wha-NO! I mean...I was joking!" Izuku spluttered. "I'm not that obsessed with studying! Why do you think that?"
Fumikage just shook his head, and smiled. "Because you're brilliant, of course."
"I...I can hear the sarcasm, you know…" Izuku didn't sound offended at all but embarrassment leaked through.
"Sarcasm or not, it's true either way." Fumikage replied softly. "You're...I can't even begin to explain how spectacular you are…"
"H-hey...you don't have to-"
"I mean it."
"Well...well you're awesome too!" Izuku replied. "You're...sincere, kind, handsome-"
"Handsome?"
"Yes-shut up, handsome, and I feel...I feel like I can trust you. Not just because I like you, but because I know you'll be there. You know?"
"I…" Fumikage stopped to wipe his eyes. "I'm not strong enough...not yet. But I will-"
"You are strong, and you'll get even stronger." Izuku stated. "But...you don't have to be, you know? Not all the time, I mean...What I mean to say is; I like you, Fumikage-kun, not your strength."
Heavens above, what did I do to deserve Izuku Midoriya?
Slowly, they lay down on the bed side by side. They held each other, their hands tentatively caressing.
"I...must confess something." Fumikage started. "I've...felt this way about you for a while. Since...the sports festival, I think. After our victory, and seeing how you led us. I...saw you in a new light."
"Oh.." Izuku breathed out. "Wow, I...had no idea, sorry."
"Don't apologize, you fool…" Fumikage muttered, which to his joy caused Izuku to laugh. "You had no way of knowing, how could you? I was hardly forthcoming with my emotions…We hardly talked much until recently.."
"I guess…" Izuku laughed a little. "But...I kinda liked the cool and mysterious thing you had going. You really made it work!"
"Really? I've heard many call it pretentious…"
"Well they're wrong. But...I like this side of you too."
"The side where I'm balling my eyes out like a child?"
"Yeah."
"Great…"
"Hey, it's not like you haven't seen me cry, right?"
"Perhaps so, but…" Fumikage thought about it. "I suppose you're right. It's hardly a bad thing. It shouldn't be, at least."
"Not at all." Izuku sighed. "But...I have a confession too. I...don't really know when I started liking you, I only really thought about it earlier today."
"Really?"
"Yeah, I know. I'm...totally oblivious with that sort of thing. But I always thought you were cool, and I definitely wanted to talk with you. It's not that I didn't like you at all it's just I didn't know what that meant, so-"
"You don't need to justify how you feel, or why…" Fumikage moved his hand onto his partner's shoulder and made a soothing motion. "I...certainly don't have the words to explain my mood right now. I understand."
"Alright, yeah..." Izuku looked up at him. "I'm glad we're doing this, though."
"Agreed."
They laid on the bed for what might as well have been forever. It passed by like a blur to Fumikage, but each movement, touch, feel of skin and breath was ingrained onto his memory.
"It's getting late…" Izuku murmured, slowly sitting up.
Fumikage did the same. "Indeed…I should get going. Heaven forbid Aizawa-sensei finds us past curfue..."
"Heh, yeah. Wouldn't want to explain that, huh?" Izuku grabbed Fumikage's arm. "But if we were allowed to, I'd let you stay the night, you know? But only if you wanted to..."
"That's...great to hear." Fumikage cupped Izuku's cheek in his hand, lamenting that it'd be the last one of the night. "I'd have gladly accepted the offer."
"Cool, cool…" Izuku's face colored crimson. "So, should I ask...In terms of...labels, are we…?"
"Dating?" Fumikage prompted, with the same uncertain tone. "Boyfriends?"
"Uh, yeah."
"Do you...want us to be?"
A pause. "Yeah. I'd like that. You?"
Fumikage let out a weighted breath. "I...would find that agreeable."
Why am I being so formal now, of all times?
SERIOUSLY, IT'S SUCH A BAD HABIT!
"Awesome." Izuku laughed. "Just wanted to clear that up, not that it was super ambiguous at this point…"
"Of course. Of course." Fumikage's smile matched his boyfriend's mirth. As they embraced in a full hug for the last time, he whispered. "I'll see you in the morning. Sleep well, Izuku."
"I'll try." Izuku whispered back. "But...I might be too excited about seeing you again, sorry."
Fumikage let himself smirk. "I understand. Myself also…"
They parted. With a hesitant wave, Fumikage turned to the door and left. Fortunately, nobody was patrolling this level, so he quickly found his room across the hall and entered.
He fell on his bed and stared at the ceiling.
...Holy hell.
HOLY SHIT, DUDE!
That...that really happened.
I KNOW! I WAS THERE!
I...have to process this.
WHAT ELSE IS THERE TO PROCESS? YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND NOW! FINALLY!
Yeah, but...I don't know what I'm doing.
HA, NEITHER DOES HE!
I suppose, but...
What's going to happen, with this?
I DUNNO. BUT IT'LL BE FUN, I BET!
Fumikage smiled at himself.
Maybe.
As Fumikage laid down on his bed-he never noticed how soft the mattress was-he let himself breathe. The moon in his mind shone clear. Shoulders relaxed, sinking into the bed. Thoughts became less complicated, reaching a calm singularity.
Then, he fell asleep.
Okay, wow...we did it. The story is officially concluded, after almost 3 years since the first chapter released. What should I say here?
Well firstly, I'd like to thank and apologize to those who have been kept waiting for over a year for this update. It means the world that so many of you were willing to wait however long it took. While this past year was quite hectic (of course), I honestly neglected this fic for longer than I should have. My priorities were elsewhere, as was my work ethic. Rest assured that this fic's completion was never in doubt, but only the "when".
But anyway, I hope you enjoyed this conclusion! I loved writing every chapter including this one, and this is probably the fic that I'm most proud of writing. I don't know if I'll write more in the immediate future, and I have no current plans at the moment. And you know how I hate making promises...
However, if you want to catch up on what I've been doing, or just say hi you can find me on Twitch! I stream video games to a lovely community, and I try to provide a wholesome environment for people to hang out. You can find me here:
.tv/epsheep
Self-promotion aside, thank you all for reading. May you all find comfort, enjoyment, and love in the story, as I have in writing it. Hell knows we need more of that in the world.
Take care, everyone,
-V