It was always the quiet moments between Elliot and Olivia where they showed how much they cared for each other. Due to their professional boundaries, there was no other way for those moments to show than in the silence. But sometimes only the silence can allow for those caring moments to truly show.

A part of Olivia knew that she could happily walk beside Elliot – his hand still holding hers – along this beach even after the sun set. But she couldn't do that. Looking at Elliot's profile, his expression so peaceful for once, Olivia drank it in for a moment before breaking the moment.

She did so by stopping their walks and bringing up the hand that she was holding – his left hand – in both of hers. Rubbing her thumb across his now bare ring finger, Olivia met his eyes. She didn't have to speak for Elliot to know what she was asking. So, letting out a breath, he led them a little ways away from the water and motioned for them both to sit down on the sand.

After tossing their shoes aside, they settled side-by-side on the sand, facing the ocean. Elliot wasted no time before speaking.

"After you left my place, it took me forever to finally fall asleep. And when I did, I had this nightmare where I thought my family was in danger. But it turned out they were absolutely fine, and it was you that I was losing…"

He reached out and gently touched the still-healing cut on her neck made by Gitano's blade. Olivia could well imagine how she had appeared in his dream. She took that hand away from his neck and kissed his fingers. "I'm here, El."

"I know," said Elliot, taking his hand back in order to focus on what needed to be said. "But that dream made me realize a lot of things, Liv." He brought up his legs so that he could wrap his arms around them. He looked out at the water for a moment before sighing. "You were right about them – my family, I mean. I haven't lost them…"

He shook his head and looked at her with pained eyes.

"I'm sorry, Liv."

Blinking hard to control the well of emotion rising in her, she asked, "What for?"

"For every time I put you down, brushing you off for not being married or a mother. You never deserved that."

Olivia shrugged. "No, but it's not like you were wrong all the time. There are some things that you can never truly understand without experiencing them."

"Maybe, but that didn't give me the right to make you feel less than you were," said Elliot. "Looking back…I think my reactions came more from you understanding more than I thought you would, and frustration that you had gotten there before me."

Olivia chuckled and nudged his shoulder with hers. "Haven't you learned by now that's generally how it always is with us?"

Elliot managed a rueful smile. "Fine. Anyway…" His tone became more serious again. "After the nightmare, I went to confession for the first time in two years. I've known the priest for years, and we talked. It helped me realize what the dream meant, and how right you were about my family…Different, not gone. It put everything into perspective.

"Then, I went to Queens to see Kathy, and I brought the divorce papers she sent me. We went over them, signed them, and had a long talk about a lot. Anyway, the divorce will be final in a week or so, once the lawyers go through everything."

Olivia let out a long breath and looked at the ocean. Listening to this news made her feel so many conflicting emotions. "I'm…I'm so sorry, Elliot," she finally said.

He looked at her with an unexpectedly calm expression. "Why are you sorry, Liv? This decision had nothing to do with you."

Olivia turned her head to meet his gaze sharply. She was speechless at these words, because it was rather hard to believe what he was saying. Nearly every time she had interacted with Kathy over the years, there had always been that glint in Kathy's eye when she watched the two of them interact, like a choreographer watching her dancers' feet for just the slightest misstep.

Reading her mind yet again, Elliot spoke firmly so that Olivia could believe him. "Liv, Kathy and I barely knew each other when we got married, and we were kids too. She'd gotten pregnant, and I had to do right by her. While I'm sure some marriages can thrive and get stronger after a beginning like that, ours wasn't one of them. The kids were our biggest reason to stay together, and the job and my determination to keep them out of that world just…it was only a matter of time before it all came to a head. You had nothing to do with that, Liv." He smiled at her. "You know, Kathy said yesterday that it would have ended years before this if it hadn't been for you."

Olivia's eyes went wide and her eyebrows shot up. Kathy had said what?

Elliot nodded. "Like I said, we talked about a lot, and your name did come up. I was like you at first, wanting to make it clear to her that you had nothing to do with my decision to sign the papers. But Kathy said that she had known that for a while now. She said the separation had helped her see a lot of things as they truly are, including you. From the presents you helped pick out for birthdays and anniversaries, to the times I would come home more willing to talk or make up for lost time." He smiled softly at her. "She wants me to thank you for that."

Olivia looked back out at the water again, mouthing "wow." She felt bad for not giving Kathy enough credit. Perhaps she hadn't because of her own feelings for Elliot. Clearing her throat a bit, she asked, "And the kids?"

"Maureen and Kathleen came, and the twins were already home. They've known this was coming for a while, and I think seeing Kathy and I being at peace with the decision and really being a team telling them helped a lot. So, we'll all move forward one day at a time."

Olivia kept her gaze on the water, but when she felt his fingers gently touch the back of her neck, she turned her head to look at him.

"All of us, Liv," he said, looking at her so tenderly that she wanted to surge forward and kiss him. But she still had one more question to ask first.

"Why did you bring me to this beach, Elliot?"

Elliot nodded slightly, scooching a bit closer to her and bringing his hand down from her neck so that he could hold hers again. It seemed to be more for his sake than for her own. "There was one more person I talked to before I came to your place, Liv. I called my mother, caught up with her and told her about the divorce."

Olivia let this sink in. "This is the first time you've ever mentioned your mother to me. Your father I've heard mentioned from time to time, not usually in a good light. I honestly assumed she was dead until Maureen mentioned to me casually that she was going to visit her a few years ago. I asked if Kathy was going with her to see her mother, and she corrected me saying that it was your mother." Olivia shrugged. "I never mentioned you or asked you anything because you'd literally said nothing, and I knew better than to push you on a subject you kept so closed off."

Elliot nodded, looking out at the water and holding her hand tightly. "When I was about five, my family rented a cottage here in Wildwood for the summer. It was the best and worst summer of my life…"

And then Elliot began to tell Olivia everything she needed to know to understand why his mother – hell, his entire childhood – had been a subject that he'd never discussed with her before. He spoke of a summer made of long days at the beach building sandcastles and playing games with his siblings. He also spoke of a terrible argument between his parents, of his mother firing a gun at his father while the latter held little Elliot in his arms. He spoke of his mother's sickness, and her decision to fully live with it rather than try to treat it, which had led to his estrangement from her. He tried to end it on a light note: "There are worse stories I could tell you about my childhood, but I think that's enough for today."

Olivia's heart broke as she listened. Elliot stared at the water all the while he talked, but his hold on her hand never loosened. His story hit her hard, especially the incident between his parents. It stirred up her own memories of her alcoholic mother.

"No wonder you understood my relationship with my mother so well," Olivia said, stroking his hand with her thumb. "You knew what it was like to grow up with a mother who was sick, who you never knew what state you'd find her in that day, that moment…You're not the only one whose mother terrified you…"

Perhaps she wanted to help him by matching his own vulnerability; he was being more open with her now than he ever had been. So Olivia decided to take that risk, too. So she told a memory of her own, a terrible one. She'd only told it once before: a year ago, after a particularly hard case of a teenage girl killing her alcoholic mother, to Casey Novak after having some liquid courage in her so that she'd go easy on the girl. A terrible tale of a desperate engagement, a terrible fight, and a terrible moment when both of them came very close to killing the other.

When she was finished, Olivia felt suddenly cold and raw all over except in two places: the hand that Elliot was still holding tightly, and the side of her face that Elliot was staring at as she'd told her story. Since she didn't have the benefit of liquid courage this time, Olivia tore herself away from him by getting up and walking back to the water, stopping when the waves could wash over her feet. At least the water still felt relatively warm.

Olivia moved her arms in order to wrap them around herself, but Elliot beat her to it – she hadn't heard him get up and walk after her. His own arms snaked around her middle, his chest pressed against her back, and his cheek rested against hers. The tears that had fallen on both cheeks mingled. With the smallest whimper, Olivia tightly rested her arms over his, and his hold on her tightened.

A particularly strong ocean breeze washed over them, and Olivia shivered slightly. In response, Elliot lowered his head and pressed his face against her neck. The sensation cause Olivia to melt against him like butter. Almost shyly, he kissed the skin at the crook of her neck, and then – with so much tenderness – he kissed the healing cut on her neck.

Overwhelmed, Olivia turned in Elliot's arms to that she could hold him. She wrapped her arms around his middle tightly and buried her face against his chest as she silently sobbed. Elliot's arms came around her shoulders, letting his own tears fall onto her shoulder.

Eventually, Elliot pulled back his head and lifted her face with his hands gently. "I never answered your question," he said in a hoarse voice.

"Huh?" said Olivia, her head muddled from so much emotion.

"You asked me why I brought you here. Because I don't want there to be any more walls between us, not when so many of them have crumbled in the last few days. Like I said yesterday, I need you in my life, Liv. In any way you'll let me. Me bringing you here is me showing you how serious I am."

Olivia shut her eyes, more overwhelmed than ever, and rested her forehead against his as she opened her heart to him as he had done for her. "I need you, too, El. So much that it terrifies me. No one knows me as well as you do, no one's ever cared so much about me…I've never been so close to anyone, let alone a man…I'd never forgive myself if I screwed this up."

"Oh, Liv," said Elliot, pulling back to meet her eyes again. "I won't let that happen. Remember: we're partners. We have each other's backs. We balance each other out. If I'm down, you pull me up, and I do the same for you. I'm not saying it will be smooth sailing all the time; we're both stubborn and who knows what life will throw us. But I know we can get through anything together. As you told me: different, not gone."

Olivia let out a long breath. Then, she nodded, slowly and deliberately as she looked into his eyes, telling him her answer through them. And, because he was Elliot, he read the answer correctly.

So, still holding her face in his hands, Elliot closed the distance between them and kissed her the way he'd always wanted to. And Olivia gave herself to it completely, with relief and joy.

Safe to say, they took their sweet time experiencing this new aspect of their relationship. By the time they had to stop for air, Olivia was practically leaning against him due to her being weak at the knees, and Elliot's fingers were tangled in her hair. When he realized this, he looked over her shoulder. His eyes widened, he muttered, 'Oh, damn,' and then ran past Olivia.

Olivia staggered at the sudden loss of contact. Turning around, completely confused and a little miffed, Olivia watched Elliot run down the beach. Then, she realized what he was doing, and she laughed as she took off after him.

She caught up with him when he'd stopped, having accomplished his mission. He turned to her with a proud look on his face and her red bandana in his hand. It had clearly slipped off while they had been kissing, due to Elliot's fingers slipping into her hair.

"Honestly, El," she panted, "it's a cheap bandana you can get in any drugstore."

Elliot shrugged. "Waste of a few bucks, and this one looks so damn cute on you." His expression became what some would call innocently playful – but Olivia saw the spark of naughtiness in his eyes. "But if you don't want it, Liv…"

He then plopped the bandana on top of his head. Since the ends were still tied together, it rested on top of his head like the most ridiculous hat. Elliot topped off the look by giving her a mockery of a seductive glance.

The sight was so shocking and comical that Olivia burst into laughter so strong that she had to double over and clutch her stomach. Elliot watched her, his expression melting into one of pure delight and love. Never had he seen Olivia laugh like that – their job had never really allowed for that. But Elliot resolved there and then to make sure she laughed like that whenever he could.

When Olivia had managed to calm herself, she walked up to him, and grabbed the bandana off his head. Then, without missing a beat, she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him again. Elliot smiled against her mouth, holding her around the waist so securely that he lifted her feet a few inches off the sand.

Hours later, rain was pouring down on Manhattan. Olivia, who had just woken from a light doze, was peaking at it through the blinds. She'd always loved the rain, especially when it poured down like this. Water had always represented healing to her, in every form it took. She was glad that it was raining tonight of all nights. Washing away the grime of the past, and nourishing the present so that it would bloom in the future.

"C'mere, Liv."

The deep and sleepy voice caused a shiver of warmth and pleasure to shoot of Olivia's bare body. She turned and looked at Elliot in the dim light of the room. His bare chest and strong arms reaching out for her…a sight she never thought she would ever see. She walked back to his king-sized bed and slipped beneath the sheets beside him. He wasted no time in pulling her to him, his warm mouth covering hers.

Olivia sighed with contentment as she let him roll her over onto her back. They'd already made love, starting practically the second after Elliot had shut his door behind them. It had been intense, to say the least. Over seven years of restrained sexual tension was finally being released, after all. Now, she knew it would be slow, tender, and excruciatingly beautiful.

Breaking their kiss, she cupped his face and looked up at him, hiding nothing in her face. "I love you."

It was the first time it had been said clearly like that – not silently against the other's cheek, not in the throes of passion or orgasm.

A tear fell from Elliot's eye onto her cheek before he responded. "And I love you."

They stopped talking after that; their actions only brought those three words home to both.

All walls had crumbled, and all barriers were broken, never to be raised again.

A/N: The stories that they tell each other about their mothers each come from a different episode: Elliot's from S10E03 "Swing" and Olivia's from S06E19 "Intoxicated."

Also, Elliot making Olivia laugh by putting on her bandana is a blatant tribute to Chris Meloni in the "Wet Hot American Summer" movie and series. If you haven't seen him in that, oh boy are you missing out on a wonderful treat. :) It never fails to make me laugh.

So, I'll be taking a break for a while. This pairing and these new episodes are more stressful than entertaining for me right now, and I need to be putting my energy into other areas of my life right now. I'll be back with other ideas and stories. In the meantime, I hope this was as good for you guys to read as it was for me to write.