The following day Katara woke up early to the sound of heavy rain hitting her window and Toph snoring from the other side of the room. Katara sighed and pulled her duvet closer, clinging to the warmth. The room was utterly freezing. Outside, the sky was completely black and starless. Katara imagined the low clouds enveloping the palace, crushing it with heavy, heavy air. She didn't feel like that would be a bad thing though, this palace was a depressing place and would honestly be improved by being crushed. Besides, the cold was a welcomed change, and so was the rain. The heat had been nearly overwhelming before the storm hit, especially for Katara, who felt most comfortable waist-deep in cold water.
She tried to get back to sleep, she didn't know what time it was, but judging by the inky darkness around her, she probably had a few hours of sleep left. She turned away from the window and closed her eyes; she knew she needed as much sleep as she could get after her pitiful rest last night. Still, sleep wouldn't take her. Her mind was still buzzing with thoughts of her and Zuko's conversation, and there was something else too. Something rising and expanding somewhere inside her, demanding to be felt and acknowledged, but katara shoved it aside. Now wasn't the time to think about her feelings. There was work to do. And she would accomplish nothing by trying and failing to sleep.
Katara shivered as her bare feet touched the freezing stone floor, it was almost unbearable leaving the comfort of her bed, especially when the palace was so unbearably unwelcoming. Shaking her head, she let go of her covers and stood up, retrieving her night robe from the floor and sweeping it around her goosbumped flesh. She walked to the window, where it sounded alarmingly like the large drops of rain were close to shattering the glass. She could hear the wind too; it roared and howled like some kind of colossal wolf-beast. The storm outside was absolute and immense, and she felt like it would blow her away if she gave it a chance.
She tore her eyes from the awe-inspiring storm outside and made up her mind, she would make herself useful. She decided to go back to Zuko's study, hopefully, he was asleep, and she could start looking through some paperwork already. She opened the door as quietly as she could, not wanting to wake Toph, and she made her way silently down the, if possible, even colder hallway. She hoped the walk would at least warm her joints up. The whole palace felt as if it were sleeping; the only sound to be heard was that of water slamming into rock. Every now and then, a loud rumbling crack could be heard from above. It sounded like two massive boulders colliding in the clouds, slamming into one another until they crumbled apart. Katara thought it was an exciting sound, and she remembered Iroh talking about the electricity, wondering if she was feeling it too.
The stone floor felt like ice against Kataras bare feet as she padded through the passageways. The palace really felt like a completely different place now, so empty and quiet. There was no staff running errands in a hurry, no noblemen followed by a gaggle of chattering advisors, no Zuko. The feeling brought her back to a time in her life when she felt very lonely. After her mother died, she knew that she was destined for nothing more than simply surviving, marrying a suitable man, and birthing children of her own. That thought had always terrified her. How could she bring children into such a bleak and hopeless world? A world where the fire nation was so close to total domination.
But then she met Aang. And together, they made the world balanced again. She supposed that meant that she could have her own children now, now that they would be safe. But with who? Who could possibly want such a broken thing as herself? But what else was she supposed to do now? Now that she had everything her brain could ever have imagined and more. Adventure, friends, and even fame. She had been given the quest of assisting the avatar in his fight against Fire Lord Ozai by some unknown force, much larger than herself. Hell, she might even call it fate. But now what? Did she even have a purpose anymore? The truth was that after the defeat of Ozai, Katara felt panicked. She no longer had a quest to fulfill or a goal to reach. And the thought that she would have to return to her tribe, marry a local man and settle with that haunted her, terrified her. How could she ever live such a normal life after what she had been through, the things she'd seen? How could she ever settle for normalcy again?
She rounded a corner, her thought's hopelessly tangled and heavy, barely watching where she was going.
"Katara?" A voice echoed from the dark, just a few feet away.
She spun to see Aang perched on a windowsill just beside her, she hadn't even noticed him. "Oh hey, Aang," She said, still slightly dazed.
"I thought you were sleepwalking or something! You didn't even see me," He chuckled. Katara just nodded, still half absorbed in her thoughts. Aang looked concerned, "Are you okay?" Aang didn't want to probe, but he was never one to just accept it when a friend was clearly down.
Katara smiled slightly; it was a genuine smile, but still forced. "Yes, I'm okay," She nodded. Aang didn't look convinced, "really," She assured, sitting down on the window ledge beside him.
Silence fell upon them, not an uncomfortable silence at all, just the kind that happens between two people who are so comfortable with each other that they don't need to speak. They sat calmly watching the scene outside. The sky had lightened slightly since Katara had woken, and she judged that dawn must be near. Soon the palace would wake again; like a beehive after a cold night, it would soon be bustling with activity. Katara didn't relish the thought, and neither did Aang. The garden outside looked like an inky painting that had been submerged in water for a long time. Everything just looked blurry and soggy. Most people didn't like this weather, but Katara didn't mind it, and that was another thing she had in common with Aang.
The avatar couldn't help but admire the roaring storm outside. In many ways, Aang felt an unexplainable connection to storms. He was drawn to them, their sheer power. He supposed it was because they reminded him that he was human, just like everyone else. Even though he was the most powerful bender in the world, he was still no more than an ant compared to the power of the storm. And wasn't a colossal storm like this exactly like a massive avatar, really? It controlled water, air, electricity, and earth. Well, earth not as much he supposed, but then he remembered the dust storms he witnessed in the earth kingdom. He smiled; he was just a mini, more controlled storm.
"Some weather, huh?" Aang finally said, his voice gently breaking the silence.
Katara was quiet for a moment, her eyes still glued to the window, "It's quite nice, though." She said, her voice not much louder than a whisper. Aang nodded, studying her face. She looked tired but very alive, something was burning in her, Aang could tell. Katara turned to find his eyes locked on her, and she wondered if this was the right time to tell him about her decision. She doubted she'd get a better opportunity, and for all she knew, this moment between them could be over any minute.
"Aang, I need to tell you something."
His eyes found hers again, and he nodded to show that he was listening.
"Zuko isn't... okay." She started, unsure of how to begin explaining and lacking better wording.
Aangs eyebrows furrowed, "I noticed that something was wrong when we first arrived, but he didn't seem like he wanted to talk about it. Then yesterday, he seemed fine again, so I assumed it had sorted itself out. Have you talked to him?"
"Yes, I have. I think that's what made him feel better. But I think he'll just go back to feeling worse when we leave. It's really complicated, he's struggling with the politics, he's taking it all very personally, and it's..." She paused, her voice cracking with emotion, "It's breaking him." She didn't know what else to say, she just hoped Aang would understand the gravity of the situation.
Aang waited for Katara to explain further, but she fell silent, her hands fidgeting in her lap. "I had no idea," He said quietly, "I mean, I knew it wasn't easy, but he's doing so well. Every treaty and agreement he puts forth makes an unimaginable difference for all the nations. The rebuilding program is moving so much faster than we ever could have hoped, thanks to him."
"I know," Katara said, "But he doesn't see that. All he sees is the damage his father and grandfather, and great grandfather did. All the hurt his nation has caused. It's like he blames himself. And no matter what he does, it's never enough for him. I tell you, he's fucking breaking." She shook her head, her eyes full of tears threatening to spill, the lump in her throat painful. There was a long pause. Aangs thought's rushed to keep up.
"You... you're going to stay here, aren't you?" Aang finally asked hesitantly. He wasn't angry, nor truly sad; he knew that wouldn't be fair. Not to her nor Zuko. Still, when Katara nodded, he felt a deep ache in his chest. She was his family, the last person still with him, his closest teammate, his sister in everything but blood. But now she would leave him too. He had always known this day would come, the day where Katara felt her calling and left to make her own life. And he supposed that it was finally time for him to do so too. Despite himself, he smiled, he was ready.
"Katara, it's okay. I understand." He said, urging Katara to meet his eyes. When she finally did, he kept on speaking. "We've been traveling together for so long now, I knew this time would come. You need to find your own path and discover your destiny. I know I'm not always going to have someone by my side, and I guess I need to start getting used to handling things on my own. And who knows, maybe we'll travel again soon. But for now, I'm endlessly grateful for the guidance and help you have handed me, and I am honored to call you my friend, Master Katara." Aang said this with a smile, but tears were making their way slowly down his face. Katara dried them with her sleeve, guilt flooding her gut at seeing her friend's tears, but she knew she had to go through with this. Aangs response had made her sure of her choice.
"You'll still be my family, Aang, you always will. I'll never forget the lessons I've learned by your side. Besides, this isn't goodbye forever, I'll still see you as often as I can, and I'll write as well. Okay?" Her voice was emotional and so reassuring, and while they didn't stop his tears, they did make his smile widen. Katara slid off the windowsill and hugged Aang, his face dug into her waist, and she couldn't hold it back anymore. She felt silent tears trickling down her face, tickling her skin. They dropped freely from her chin onto the shaved head of the avatar in her arms. When Aang let go, he was no longer crying, only smiling.
"I hope you can help Zuko." He said, his voice steady and so, so kind.
"So do I," Katara said, drying her cheeks and smiling.