Two Years Later
Loud sounds of a stampede rush down the district stairs, echoing the sounds of her huffs. The metal gate of the Intelligence entrance flies open, almost striking a patrol officer. She waves back her apology continuing to the lobby doors. Her reasoning for working a shift merely a means to secure the next week off for Christmas. Speeding out of the district, Erin bumps Bruno.
"Lindsay! Just the person I was looking for." Captain Bruno encroaches on her. Erin knows she must make this quick. Bruno became a big proponent of the CPD Holiday Festival ever since taking it over. There was no simple hello and go when Bruno got a hold of you.
"I'm not working the festival Bruno," Erin brushes past, excusing herself out of the way.
"We couldn't have you there last year. We would love to have you this year. You were great," Bruno attempts to reengage.
"I was barely there working it. Merry Christmas." Erin steps outside, blowing out a breath of relief. Looking out into the parking deck, she sees Jay perched on the hood of their 300. The way he is waiting outside for her reminiscent of her spiral during the summer.
Her partner has been through the wringer in his attempts to keep in step with her. The fact he never gave up on her meant everything, no matter the good, the bad, the ugly, and the wild mother. She thought if she played all her cards, she could see how strong their feelings for each other were. Whenever a close call presented itself, she willfully tried not to seek him out. Their Christmas romance replayed over and over in her mind. Every time she pulled back another layer, she was afraid he wouldn't look at her the same. She was wrong. A man like Jay Halstead wasn't backing down easily. He continuously showed up for her, day after day, in all the ways that mattered. She loves him for it. Her musings are interrupted by the boisterous hunk in question.
"You slayed the paperwork monster after all," Jay cheers. The Chicago wind blows his tie and wisps of his hair. His hands rubbing his arms for warmth. He must have been waiting outside of the car for a while.
"Yes! I carry the flag of victory proudly," she buffs her chest. His face a refreshing sight. She was stuck with a load of paperwork, but Jay was exempt due to a court appearance. From what her eyes can see, Jay looks extra delectable in his blue two-piece suit and loafers, collar undone, and the dark grey accents of his loose tie and coat make her knees weak standing toe to toe with him at the hood.
"Good, because I was about to go in there and rescue the queen."
"Ready to fight my battles, huh? You take your chivalry seriously, don't you?"
"Only when it comes to my woman," the magnetic pull of his gaze oozes sex appeal. He must be purposefully trying to woo her.
"You're such a charmer, Halstead." She elbows him, swiping the driver's seat. Her dimples are in full view of another easy victory. He reluctantly circles the car to claim his rightful spot in the passenger seat. He unbuttons the ends of his suit jacket before bulking his seatbelt.
"Usually, that earns me a kiss or my hands on the driver's seat," he grins. His eyes shine, wittingly playing at her self-control.
"Uh-uh, nope. We have other things set for today. Tight schedule, Jay."
"Alright. Stop by my place first. I want to change out of this suit," Jay grumbles.
"No!" Erin whips her head to him. "No-no time for that. Tight schedule," she says through clenched teeth, maintaining her poker face. Jay is not changing out of that suit. It is her treat for the day, and she is not spoiling the rare occurrence.
"If I'm not changing outfits, then you should consider wearing something else," Jay taunts lamely, corners of his mouth turning up.
"What!" The growl of her clenched teeth warning this time. "See if I share any of my cheese now," she scoffs but meets his eyes with a soft smile. Erin adjusts the car's mirrors accordingly and looks in the rearview mirror, "What is that?" She twists in her seat to examine the figure obscuring her mirror. In plain sight is an elf on the shelf staging. One elf is bent over the trunk of a police car, and two in a compromising position on the front windshield, with the police lights flashing.
Jay bites back his laughter at Erin shaking her head disapprovingly. Not the first time she is subject to his humor presented outwardly as Christmas innuendos. To Erin's dismay, up to this point, Jay believes the jokes are solid. Most failed, but he has a few fond ones.
...
Erin was on her third cup of coffee for the day. They had been on an abduction case for the last seventy-two hours, no break. A laborious week to start the month of December landed on the obligatory reel of misfortunes the universe had for her. A series of reoccurring events kept her from any holiday season magic. As she sullenly spun the stirrer in her coffee, her mind wandered to the one thing she wanted.
"I hid the pickle," Jay whispered excitably, watching over his shoulder for any of his coworkers.
"You did what?" She gazed at him inquisitively, her voice groggy.
"I hid-the-pickle," he grinned.
"Pickle? What pickle, Jay?" She questioned, rubbing her eye.
"You know that tradition, hide a pickle in the Christmas tree. The first one to find it gets a present."
"Jay, I don't want my place smelling of pickles."
"C'mon, it's fun. I hid it at my place. If you find it … you get to see my pickle too."
...
"Jay, I dare you to try it on Lindsay," Ruzek ribbed clamorously. Back in the bullpen were the guys, Jay, Ruzek, Atwater, and Mouse. The notable three were pursuing an undisclosed undertaking. "I'm serious, Jay. Do it. Here in the bullpen when they get back," Ruzek goads, riled up by his idea and Atwater hyping him up.
"Man. You got to do it. Think of the stories we can tell. Iconic," Atwater joined in on the proposition.
"Hell no," Jay refused immediately. "One, Voight. Two, in the bullpen? You crazy? We have to keep it professional. Third, if it doesn't go disastrously, I would rather be at one of our places."
"C'mon, Halstead," Atwater leaned back in his chair, and Ruzek wheeled over to him dejectedly.
"You've been dared, man. I'm putting in my wager," Mouse pointedly decided to agree.
"Alright, let's do it. Her place," Jay compromised. Atwater and Ruzek hi-fived each other.
(Later)
"I didn't realize you all would be over for the college game. I would have made more," Erin placed the bowl of nachos on the coffee table, taking her seat on the couch next to Mouse.
"Our bad, Linds. Halstead mentioned it while we were slummin in the bullpen," Atwater apologized and backhanded Ruzek.
"Yeah, we'll get out of your hair before it gets too late in the evening. Just waiting for the halftime show," Ruzek exulted, sipping his beer.
"If you are all here for the game, why not stay-" Erin wondered before she was cut off by Jay calling her name.
"You have a large package at the door," Jay bragged. He kneeled by the front door, his back to her. He stood up and made his way over to her.
"I do!" Erin excitedly burst, jumping from her seat towards Jay. Erin lagged in her gallop, noticing straightway his change in form holding the box. "Is the box heavy? What's in it?"
"Why don't you open it and see. Seems to be a pretty 'huge' gift," Jay grinned, correcting the balance of the box in front of his pelvis.
"Ugh! Jay, are you kidding me?"
"You're not going to open it?" Jay calls behind her. Erin walked off to her bedroom, yelling how no woman ever wants a dick in the box as a Christmas gift.
...
His favorite one, surprisingly, was Erin's attempt to be cute.
The pair nearing their requested time-off decided to use their lazy Sunday to select a holiday performance to watch. Erin and Jay propped against opposite ends of the couch, their legs bent and feet side-by-side. Jay read over the brochure of Chicago's offerings at the theatre, music complex, and season tickets at the ballet school. "Handel's Messiah, Swan Lake, Prodigal Son, Takács Quartet, Little Match Girl, The Snowman, The Nutcracker, The Sleeping Beauty, Two Pianos-"
"-Are you making those up?" Erin scooched down in her spot, narrowing her eyes at him.
"The brochure is in my hands," he waved the paper.
"They all sound like sex positions. We should try one."
"Seriously?" Jay cringed. Erin gave him an unanswerable shrug.
"All I know is nutcracker wouldn't be one of them. Anything called The Nutcracker is-," his entire body shivered. "To get in the dirty joke winner's circle, Erin, you got to work on your creativity."
"I want to go see it. I'm picking The Nutcracker," Erin whined, kicking his feet away from her and turned to lay in the couch cushions.
"Before we go to the show, I want to have a taste of your milk and cookie."
"Jay!"
...
Erin fixates on the red and blue lights of the toy police car, "You're joking, right? We can't honestly drive around with these elves in the back of our vehicle."
"Why can't we? Very appropriate for the holiday season, trendy."
"How they are situated, no, I disagree." her intrigue dissipating.
"I'm hoping to get you in that position later."
"You wish."
"Later, I'm sure I will hear you wish for it."
She answers him with a mock chuckle and advises him to take it down at their next stop. They set a course for one of their established Christmas traditions.
Their first stop marks a return to the Christkindlmarket. Erin gleefully roams all the kiosks, booths, and stands, her raclette baguette in hand. She losses Jay ten minutes into entering the market. Despite the deviation in their plans, she uses the free time, until Jay's eventual tracking skills find her, to check out the next kiosk she stumbles upon. She is not an avid wearer of scarves, but almost all the men in her life are. She selects one for each of them, splurging extra on Jay's scarf.
She is optimistic about Christmas this year. Last year she was away for Christmas. Erin was required to finish out her short stint on the DEA's task force. Accepting the job in early December meant being locked into the sixty day probationary period. In an effort not to burn bridges, she did not leave right away. They agreed in her concluding her duties by trailing the organization in other avenues. The work had led to longer nights and work trips to Miami, Buffalo, and Detroit. It beat Bolivia in a landslide; however, it resulted in her being away from Jay during Christmas. They played with the idea of seeing each other, no longer at risk of Hank down their necks about fraternizing. Her returning to the 21st brought up the cycle again. Her fear of Hank's disapproval, needing to protect her partner, and yet again rejecting Jay. The circumstances alone made her exhausted. Her indignant behavior following did nothing to preempt her fallout. Dealing with Nadia's murder was the culmination.
Losing Nadia dredged up old feelings of guilt and sadness from losing Jules. If only she had been quicker up the stairs, faster to compress the wound, or stronger in her prayers. If only she hadn't been pressed on Yates, easily swayed, and persuaded into justice. Those ifs tormented her. Maybe if this, then they would be alive. Nadia and Jules were her closest friends, Nadia her best friend and Jules her sister. It all ate at her. Showing up to the district each day, passing their old desks and lockers, and their favorite corner nocks to gossip. She was to blame. Her place in Intelligence resulted in their murders. The only solution available was to step away from it all. Even that decision did not prove to be without consequence.
A silver lining appeared from the chaos, confirmation that she could not hide from Jay anymore. She avowed her heart and decided to give them a real shot. Each day after more manageable and increasingly better than the last.
Spending Christmas with Jay as an official couple excites her. She became one of the overtly sentimental girlfriends she despises. She took Jay to a chocolate shop and surprised him with a private chocolate tour and tasting. Chocolate, his favorite indulgence, she used as an opportunity to present one of his gifts. The teller brought out her stowed kraft gift box. Inside, it had matching flannel shirts, a flashlight, fishhooks, bug spray, a Sherpa hat, a bottle of whisky, and a s'more kit, minus the chocolate. Jay was touched by the gift and thrilled to hear it was her saying yes to his offer to celebrate Christmas Day at his cabin. Tasting the chocolate turned out to be erotic for Jay. Observing the way Erin sampled it, reacted to the flavors, and showed a keen interest in feeding the chocolate to him. He lost all control when she cursed, knowing full well she did not temper the chocolate correctly. The private tour earned them the privilege to be more hands-on and allowed them to help in the chocolate-making process. Erin made a mess of things, particularly herself. The uncomfortable chocolatier had to remind them of where they were. Especially considering how far Jay had his tongue down her throat. They hastily picked out their chocolate to go with their s'mores kit and made their exit. When they returned to his apartment, Jay showed her what pitched tent to expect at the cabin.
Erin strolls by several more vendors, admiring all the featured knickknacks, apparel, and novelty gifts. The smell of roasting nuts and gingerbread transporting her to a magical place. She feels her inner child thanking her for making such an effort in the jubilance of Christmas. All the Christmas songs have a deeper meaning, and the cliched frenzy of aligning every Christmas detail is now a category she falls into. A plus is that her partner, in more ways than one, similarly appreciates this time of year. She loves his lingering stares and slower strides during the Christmas season. Relative to other times out of the year, Jay pays extra attention to romance in December. Thinking about him reminds her, he is still missing.
Jay, with his Bavarian pretzel, munches on, browsing the featured artisanal booths. The first one showcases various designs of ornaments. The second one displays figurines, nutcrackers, and pyramids. The current one he stops at is his favorite. Scents are a big deal for him. The huge selection of soaps, body lotions, candles, and shaving products at this stand delights him. The smells of the essential oils for the bath pique his interest. He purchases the holiday set to take along with him to the cabin. The scent he cherishes the most engulfs him, halting his temptation to shop. Jay wraps his arm around her and kisses the top of her beanie-covered head. Her gorgeous smile and sparkling eyes, as she speaks to the attendant, add to his contentedness. Erin pays for a shaving kit bundle, proudly saying the gift is for her boyfriend. Jay holds her closely, the moment a breath of fresh air. It instills a sense of pride in him. They can freely be public about their relationship. His blue eyes reveal to her hazel gems the words unspoken.
Skipping out on working the CPD Holiday Festival did not mean Erin is avoiding the festivities. She met Jay at this festival. There are significant memories and ties to this place. For that reason, she included it in their activities today. They stroll down memory lane, passing the vinyl booth where they met and the beloved game, Frosty Toss. Jay scores another win.
Immersing themselves in the games and merchants, Erin reminds herself she forgot to get tickets for their other events. She plays her best act in convincing the teller at the ticket booth to give her a spot. Planting on her pout and pleading eyes, "Charlene, you know me. Come on, do me a solid here." Erin's pout develops into a smile. "You can double book us. They won't turn us down. The festival is reputable and wants its guests to have a good time. What is a couple more people?"
Charlene's empty stare not affording her an answer. Her eyes impassive, she dares Erin to continue. "Bu-bu-but, Charlene," Erin laughs nervously, "it's Christmas. We really want these tickets," Erin turns to Jay for help, raising her forehead to him in question. Jay flustered himself does not know how to jump in. Charlene's judging stare ready for a new contender.
"I'm-I'm a veteran too. You can spot a couple of tickets, right?" The steel glare Charlene sends paralyzes him. Her eyes back on Erin, "No special favors here. If you wanted tickets, you should have bought your tickets. Sneak on like you did the first time," Charlene says coolly, "And veterans get a substantial discount when you purchase."
Erin walks away sullenly, her energy depleting. She surrenders to the nearby bench. Before she can start to relax, Jay squeezes in next to her. She jumps, her mind elsewhere, not cognizant of his closeness next to her.
"We got plenty of activities to dip our hands in," Jay wraps his arm behind her, massaging her head and pulling her into him, "Many more to go. Say we do a few more things here and then head out for lunch?" Erin nods, nuzzling the stubble on his chin and kissing his jawline.
Their unlucky streak continued. Six Strati had no gelato, resulting in Erin storming out and stress eating more than she planned to at Portillo's. Overcrowding at Macy's led to a timed line for Santaland, no walk-ins allowed. It is too early to stop in the bar. Much of her optimism fizzled. To salvage Erin's Christmas spirit, Jay offers they commit to Christmas shopping. Whether it be the appeal retail therapy or leaving the department store, Erin brightens up. They set off on bargain hunting, visiting the dollar store, supermarket, and local small businesses they favored.
Jay flinches when Erin rushes back into the car and slams the door. "Pedal to the medal, Halstead," Erin quips.
"I'm still surprised you are letting me drive."
"Early Merry Christmas gift," her sarcasm misses the mark. His hand leaves the keys in the ignition, and he settles in his seat. He knows something is bugging her but averts the question to ask her.
"Jay, we have to get back to the district. Just drive," a sour bite to her tone. He is upset too that they got called in for evidence briefing. He shifts to Erin, tilting his head to look at her. She blinks her eyes away from his gaze to look out the window. The small changes in her face, the downturn of her lips, her glazed eyes, and her furrowed brows tells him she is not fine. He quickly inventories the last couple of hours and draws a blank on if he did something to provoke her. He intertwines their hands and gives her a gentle squeeze.
"I know we wanted today to be sort of an anniversary to our first Christmas together ... and I'm sorry us getting called back in is ruining that." The comment does not reach Erin, and her posture stiffens to the edge of her seat. She cushions her head between the headrest and the window. Her eyes focus on the bookstore she asked to stop at. Her lips are tight. One of her tells when she feels a plethora of emotions, and refuses to express them, is to bite the inside of her lips. "Erin. You know how much I want to recreate it too, build our traditions. It sucks our plans are backfiring, but that does not change me wanting to spend Christmas together," he presses, bringing his hand up to grab her shoulder.
Jay hears a choked cry, his name cracking through it. Erin's hand covers her face, "It's not that. Jay, it's not about that." Her lips curve slightly, dimple appearing. "Any moment spent during Christmas with you is enough for me," she rasps fondly. She straightens up before turning to him, "Us repeating the whole day or not isn't why I'm-," her voice brittle, "-I saw Bunny in there." Saying it out loud triggers her to breathe out harsher, her betrayal of tears tugging at his heart. Seeing Erin like this is painful. As painful as it is, he knows her anguish is worse. "She's in there with her husband and his family. I thought she would have been dead on him by now. Her, in there, story time with Santa. Wasn't something I was prepared to see." His hold on her shoulder tightens as he rubs up and down her arm.
"That couldn't've been easy, babe," his hand finding its spot on her neck, his thumb caressing behind her ear. The trick does its job, and she relaxes in his hand. His touch is soothing, her safety net. "Bunny," he says, distaste in his mouth from uttering the name, "is putting on a charade. Inside there," his eyes motion to the bookstore, "will never mean anything to her or show how it feels to try your damn hardest to experience them with you." His eyes are full of affection.
"You're always going to be the best thing about Christmas to me," her voice choppy, managing to recover and focus on the man in front of her.
"Mine too, babe," he kisses her nose tenderly. His thumb brushes her lips and guides the corner into a smile. The action earns him a soft laugh. "You're all mine," he speaks huskily. His lips prove just how safe she is with him. Sweet and delicate, his kiss moves over her lips scorched of a passion only he can bring. Jay cannot allow tonight to be ruined, even if today's plans are falling to hell. He loves this woman, and he is prepared to tell her.
Jay cannot keep his eyes off her. The way she points her finger in Voight's face, how her frustrated groans ring in the bullpen, and how she snatches the file boxes from the D.A., he is finding it hard to breathe. Erin tears through the folders of affidavits, the photo and physical evidence, and the witness list. It would be all but impossible to stop her from taking on the workload. She snips at Ruzek when he reaches for a file box. He recoils and hides behind Jay. Atwater joins their huddle around Jay's desk gaping at Erin. The coat she has yet to remove is hindering her arm span. She takes it off, practically ripping it from her body along with her gloves. She plucks her yellow highlighter, bites off the cap, and marks up the sheet in front of her. Jay wipes his eyebrow; she is making him sweat.
He clears his throat and retreats to the break room. He occupies himself with mixing water and cocoa for Erin. Their Christmas spirit showing up in their work-life, Jay and Erin bought cocoa mix, peppermint mocha grounds, and all the holiday flavors of creamer. He tops her hot cocoa with extra whipped cream and adds a candy cane. After one silent prayer, he moseys over to her desk. Erin starts picking at the fuzz on her cardigan, looking like the grumpy cat. She is such a beauty, even more so with the fury swirling off her. He approaches her desk stealthier than he needs to because he wants to eyeball his partner. Ruzek and Atwater shake their heads at him, watching intently to what Erin will do. He resists the urge to chuckle as she tosses the first box to the floor and grabs the second one. She grimaces at the stack of boxes in front of her desk left to review. Using his better judgment, he doesn't voice how adorable he finds her, dressed in her causal denim on denim outfit, layered with her grey cardigan. He instead places down her hot cocoa and pinches her cheek. She swats his hand away, her wail of exasperation shooing him. Softly chuckling at her, he tromps to Voight's office.
Closing the door harshly behind him, he ignores Olinsky and Dawson in the room, and he aims straight for Voight. "Sarge," Jay begins frankly.
"I know Halstead. We all know," Voight says sternly.
"Let's focus on what the D.A needs us to check. We need a solid case. We nearly had the charges dismissed at the preliminary hearing," Dawson chimes in.
"Once we pinpoint a key motive in this evidence, the sooner you can all get out of here. Locking up this bastard is on top of my mind right now," Voight ends.
"His arrest was by the book. He cannot be released back to that family," Olinsky imparts in a level way.
"At least we should release Erin," Jay sighs. "You all know I have something scheduled for her tonight," he prods.
"I'll happily have you be the one reviewing it all if you don't like the fact we have to be here," Voight gruffly insinuates. Crossing his arms, Jay peers out the glass window and notices Erin has vacated her desk. He exits to go check on her.
In the middle of the bullpen, Erin spilled out all the files on the floor. There are piles scattered around her. Erin pins back her hair and rolls her sleeves up. The chaos forces Ruzek and Atwater to retreat to Mouse's desk. Mouse looks equally terrified.
Jay glances back to Voight's office, hinting to them to step out. They funnel out to see Erin digging through the papers within her grasp, racing blindly to complete the bundles she created. All the men share looks of concern. Voight motions Jay to grab her and go on a break. Jay flinches momentarily, calculating how to not rouse her further.
"Hey, Erin. I know you said you weren't upset about our day not going as planned, but I see you might be a little bit. Yeah?" The murderous look in her eyes sends Jay into a bloody heap on the floor, next to her files. He successfully recovers and attempts the alternative. "There's a honey bun in the vending machine calling your name," Jay tries gently, crouching down. "You can have it with the hot cocoa I made." Erin considers him for a moment. Standing up, she kicks the mess of files and darts to the said vending machine.
Three honey buns, a bag of chips, and one trail mix are the cost of stifling her anger. The bonus of Jay encasing her against the vending machine. "Why do we keep meeting like this. You, Hulk, and me, Captain America," Jay whispers.
"That's your pairing? You don't want to be my Black Widow?" Erin rasps velvety.
"Thought you could be both. My mysterious Black Widow finds herself turning into She-Hulk," his voice drops low.
She quickly looks to see if anyone is passing through, "Is that your dirty fantasy? And the reason why you have me pinned here? Away from everyone," her big round hazel eyes delighting him.
"Yes. Also, knowing you love seeing me in this suit. Wanted to make sure I treated you." With a lovely tap to her ass, he spurs them back to their desks.
The unit divided up the evidence briefing after Erin's gracious relinquishment of control. A combined effort afforded them the opportunity of finishing within two hours. Voight requested Jay and Ruzek to deliver the filing boxes back to the D.A.'s office. Calling it a night for the rest of the unit, he begins to take off for the evening, stopping short when he finds Erin in the break room.
"Kid. The rest of the night is yours," Voight emphasizes.
"I'm gonna wait for Jay," Erin says reclusively.
"You sure, kid. I can drop you home."
"No thanks," she slumps on the couch, "No need in me rushing anywhere. It's not like I have anything else to do," she grumpily explains, resting her face in her hand on the armrest.
"Merry Christmas, Erin," Voight smiles. He settles on the simple gesture. His way to not implying the remaining part of her night, Jay's surprise.
She raises her head, the frustration in her expression morphing into affection, "Merry Christmas, Hank."
Erin does not know the amount of time that has gone by. Scrolling her phone and twisting her hair, she is getting bored. Her stretches ease the tension created in her limbs. She sits up from her seat to go back to her desk. Two people come into view, bounding the stairs. Kim and Caitlyn reach the top and spring towards Erin.
"What are you two doing here?"
"Jay's car broke down on his way back to the district. He knew I was picking up Adam," Kim says.
"We are all meeting at Molly's anyways. Jay asked Kim to grab you instead. They will join us there," Caitlyn adds.
"He didn't tell me that," Erin grits out, slamming her phone down.
"You know men, only thinking about their cars first," Caitlyn laughs awkwardly.
They sense Erin seething and back off, inching away. "This is unbelievable," Erin yanks her coat, beelining for the exit.
"Molly's is dressed up as a cute little Christmas bar now, leading up to Christmas Eve. It's going to be fun," Caitlyn follows, motioning her hands at Kim to keep going.
"Yeah, Erin. I haven't seen you at Molly's since this month started. Come hang out with us," Kim says.
Erin refuses to answer them. Jay never mentioned any plans to Molly's. Molly's is not even a bar he likes to frequent during Christmas. She is fuming, trying to solve this weird ordeal in her head. They are celebrating their anniversary. Where did the idea of Molly's come from?
Her annoyance is pouring lava, ready to burn anyone in reach. When they arrive at Molly's, not one person from the unit is there. Erin directs her irritation to her friends. They keep checking their phones and glancing at each other nervously. "You two going to tell me what is going on," Erin eyes them suspiciously.
"This cocktail is delicious. I'm glad I ordered this one," Caitlyn stammers. Kim nods.
"Why are they not here," Erin yells over the voices in the crowded bar.
"Just take a shot, Lindsay," Kim hesitantly passes her a shot glass.
"Yeah. Erin, chill," Caitlyn mistakenly attempts to simmer her down. Erin bolts, her chair scrapes the floor. They rush after her, cornering her outside. "Erin. Listen," Caitlyn shakes, her anxiety surging. An angry Erin not an easy version of her friend to handle.
Erin scoffs when her call to Jay goes unanswered again. "Can you take me home? I'm over all of this now?" Erin snaps.
Kim and Caitlyn nod to each other, agreeing to her outburst, and they pack into Kim's car. Erin detects something is up when Kim veers off the direction of her place. Before she can speak up, Caitlyn hands her an item from the front seat. "Put that on," Caitlyn instructs.
Erin examines the cloth, the fabric a black plush material with an elastic band attached. "Cover your eyes with it. No peeking," Caitlyn says sweetly.
No peeking. She hears Jay whispering that in her ear. No peeking, Erin. She shakes her head in disbelief, laughing hysterically when her eyes are covered. "Jay knows I hate surprises," her onslaught of laughter uncontrollable, "He would do this, try and surprise me, when surprises are, the last thing I want." Caitlyn turns to Kim, puzzled. "Our whole day hasn't been going as planned. Why not add something else to it," Erin withdraws back into her seat.
"Honey, think of it as a gift and not a surprise. We won't call it a surprise," Caitlyn sympathizes, her face frowning in worry. Kim continues to haphazardly drive around the city, turning the radio to the Christmas station. The music elevates the mood in the car, Erin's silence appearing to be a good sign.
"Okay, keep walking this way," Caitlyn puffs, "yeah, like that." Caitlyn and Kim are leading Erin by the arms to a secret location. The darkness, cold air, and unknown route thrill her. Her excitement grows due to no longer being in the car and the possibility of seeing Jay.
"I trust youse ladies," Erin smiles, almost tripping over one of their feet. All three happily bonded together, laugh in a chorus at the situation.
The automatic sound of sliding doors opening causes Erin to wince. She holds on tighter to her friends' arms. They pull her along; since she is not able to discern any of her surroundings. They position her to a stop, removing her hands. "You can remove the blindfold," Caitlyn tells her with exuberance, eliciting Erin's curiosity to move quickly.
Fluorescent lighting blinds her at first. Eyes adjusting to the brightness, her surroundings take shape. Bold colors, high shelving, and prominent signage appear, helping Erin figure out where she is. "Skye Toy Factory," Caitlyn reveals.
"Erin Lindsay, are you ready for the toy run of your dreams?" Kim's amplified voice comes out of a megaphone. Erin twists around to find her. Caitlyn helps Kim bring over a shopping cart, wheeling it in front of Erin.
"What is this?" Erin hides her growing smile. Her hands wring the cart handle.
"A once in a lifetime chance to snatch up goodies for your epic toy extravaganza!" Caitlyn booms in a second megaphone. Erin's smile turns smile crooked, the uneasiness of what is happening settles in. They are in a toy store that is closed for the evening, to do shopping. The entire thing insane but exhilarating.
"You'll have five minutes to grab anything you see in here. Off the shelves, walls, tags, baskets, whatever you can put in your cart in five minutes is yours."
"In five, four ..." Stress lines form on Erin's forehead, and her fingers solidly grip on the handle. "Three, two ..." She sucks in her cheeks, the countdown alerting her to face in the direction of the cart. "... One!"
Erin squeals and pushes off. Caitlyn and Kim coach her from behind. She is overwhelmed with the number of sections and long aisles of toys and games. The speed she is racing down the aisle increases her adrenaline. Shouts of joy fill in as her background sound. She grabs a set of log-building toys, puzzles, and novelty items. Sprinting around to the next section, she tosses in all licensed toys from her favorite tv shows and movies. She picks at a few more, choosing some superheroes. Whipping the cart, she rushes to the assortment of baby toys.
"Dolls, dolls," Erin seeks out. She rounds the display, not finding any.
"Down here," Caitlyn points, smiling.
Erin dashes back into her hunt. She lunges for a coveted Cabbage Patch Doll. After springing in a few more accessories, she rushes to the bicycles picking up tags for a bike, scooter, and a buggy. She shoves one of the classic red wagons under her cart. Winded, Erin stops to peer into her basket.
"Two minutes left. Let's fill up this thing," Kim bubbles, the puffball on her hat dancing with equal enthusiasm.
"Okay," Erin beams. "Games, movies, those foam launcher things, toy oven, and these," Erin flings a handful of stuffed animals and pillows in the basket. Erin plans for Danny and picks up a countless number of children's developmental toys. More ground than she can cover, the options to choose in the store stimulates her.
"One minute left," Kim announces in her megaphone. "C'mon girl, shop 'til you drop," Caitlyn shouts. Jogging to the end of the aisles, Caitlyn points at the children's book offerings. Erin pushes along to snatch up a couple of the featured titles. Then Erin catches sight of the store's Christmas collection.
"Five, four ..." Her countdown begins. She sprints to the closest shelf. "Three, two ...," She exerts her last burst of energy, pushing the cart and her legs as fast as possible. "... One!" Her fingers grab two Christmas Barbie dolls. Cooling down, she wipes her forehead. She laughs, in shock that she completed a toy run. Her friends brought her to the store tonight, and it was fun. She is having the time of her life. Given all her frustration, they made sure she got here.
"How was it," Caitlyn says animatedly. Erin can only smile at them. Her face lights up, the appreciation speaking a thousand times more. "Let's get you over to the front and get these bagged." Kim and Caitlyn lead the way to the checkout lanes. Erin looks back over her shoulder as they slowly straggle behind her. Confused, she asks them why they stopped. They gesture her to keeping going to the front. Eyeing them with suspicion once again, Erin advances, rounding to the entrance. The one person she is waiting to see is standing in the middle of the entryway.
Jay, firmly planted in the center of the checkout lanes, smiling wide, his arms outstretched for her to join him. Erin freezes in her tracks. Her initial flight or fight cautions her as not having prepared for what is happening. Movement on her right distracts her momentarily. People she recognizes come into view: Hank and the rest of the unit. Platt and their other colleagues from the department. Annie, Justin, and Danny. Their mutual friends from Med and CFD. Caitlyn and Kim excuse themselves into view and wave to her to keep going.
With enough strength she can muster, Erin shoves the cart away. The clang of the cart hitting a counter riles up the others, laughing at her antics. Striding to Jay, each step of her feet does an equal twist in her stomach. Each swing of her arms leaves her forgetting how to breathe. The backdrop consisting of two Christmas trees and white glow lights, hanging between each tree, circles Jay in a lustrous glow. Petals of red and white roses stringed along the floor guide her nearer. His blue-eyed gaze steady on her. She shivers at the realization of the look in his eyes. She feels extremely vulnerable and bashfully bows her head, looking away. Hesitant at first, her confidence restores when Jay captures her hands.
"Hey, you," Jay says adoringly.
"Hey," Erin swallows, her lashes fluttering uncertainly.
"How do you feel, beautiful?" His smile vacant of his teasing smirk or his boyish grin, but effortlessly Jay.
"Good. You-you did all of this for me?"
"The best prize is always at the end of these things, right? I couldn't have you celebrate without me. Not when you have won my heart, secured my dreams, and hold my soul," Jay proclaims, his emotions full of passion. He brings her hands to his chest, placing them near his rapidly beating heart. Their smiles are identical and their breathing matches, reliving every moment they have shared. He is amazed by the woman in front of him, their love story beginning the second he saw her.
She shuffles in his hold, mentioning her coat is on and isn't. "You don't have to worry about that," he kisses her knuckles, "I remember the first words you said to me. Do you know what they were?" Erin shakes her head, no. "Did you find a vinyl you like?"
"And what did you say?" Erin murmurs, his favorite shade of heavenly gold and green are glittering brightly, prime for him to continue.
"I found it," he recites. "I found it and not just it. I found you. Erin, you consume me. I want you. I desire you. The most important words of all, I love you," he professes. Her labored gasp reassures him, and she hooks on every word. "There was one thing your Christmas romance didn't get, and that was a love confession," he pauses, "Erin Lindsay, I love you. I love your tenacity. I love your compassion and your empathy. I love how you are way more hilarious than me, but I adore far more how you laugh at my lame jokes. I love how you don't question the excuses I make to sit close to you in the bullpen. I love your strength. You're a badass, and I know you could probably kick my ass too." He chuckles, biting his lip. "I love how you're never the first one to arrive on time to work but the smartest and most clever one amongst us. I love how you can make any moment fun. I love the fact that you drive all the time. You drive me crazy. I love when you share your food with me and when you don't. I love that Cheetos make you barf, and you only enjoy real cheese." She chokes out a laugh, sniffing back her tears. "I love seeing your frazzled face when the sun rises. I love how effortless you look when it's just you and me alone at night. I love how your nose twitches when you try and prevent yourself from crying, how it flares, how it crinkles up. And that smile, the one only for me. Then those amazing dimples I love so much. I love how happy I make you feel." Tears are cascading down her face, and she licks the drops rolling on to her lips. Jay shifts his weight from one foot to the other. He lowers their joined hands, and his hands find her waist.
"You're not going to ask me to marry you, are you?" Erin blurts out.
Jay's face pulls up in confusion, and he chuckles fondly, "No, at least not yet. I have a lot of things I want to do as your boyfriend before I make you my wife," he cups a hand to her face. "Most of them are happening tonight. Expect a proposal tomorrow," they both laugh. Jay holds her closer, and the loving look in his eyes is one Erin can read now. A look that turns out to be one that was in his eyes this entire time. She kisses his wrist, her warm tears greeting his hand.
His eyes glisten, and he takes a deep breath before he expresses the last part, "I love you so much. I love that you never give up on others. You believe in the benefit of the doubt, especially with me. I'm glad you never gave up on finding romance. Because Erin Lindsay, you are my fairy tale. Every day. Luckily for us, this fairy tale does not end. I will always be yours."
Her watery eyes and reddening nose emerge as a happy sob that escapes her toothy smile, a smile so wide it repeated his words back to him.
"I love you, Erin," his hands caress for face, her skin softer and moist with tears, the most beautiful he has seen her. Her skin rich and tasting like honey when he grazes her lips. He mouths the words for only her to hear and proudly meets her lips in a kiss unmatched, full of heat. She finds a gap for air, the blaze of his touch needing more oxygen. His arm wraps around her back, needing more of her. She circles her arm around his neck and her other hand strokes up his neck, reciprocating the kiss with a fervor uniquely hers. She rolls onto her tiptoes, craving his warmth. Her body presses against him, wavering his placement on the ground, and he stumbles back, his hands clutching her to him.
Their kiss breaks apart, and Jay signals for the group to join them. "Everyone can see me crying," she conceals her face in his chest. His hand soothes up and down her back. Whoops and cheers from their family and friends proceed towards them.
"Hank," Erin sniffles as she turns slightly to him, Jay's hold on her far from loose.
"You got a good man, kiddo," Hank nods to Jay. His approval earned the minute Jay planned this surprise.
"Yeah, he is," she looks back to his loving seafoam eyes.
"We will take care of your things, Erin. You got a night ahead of you," Caitlyn and Kim say in unison.
Jay is a man in love. The innate feeling kind of love. He thought he could not stop looking at her before. Now, there is no comparison. Find him a podium, and he will holler from a dozen rooftops. His love confession opened the flood gates of her positively swooning over him. Erin left unmoving and rapt in silence, leads Jay to physically walking her out of the toy store.
Her blissful smile entrancing her in hypnosis that Jay almost gets sucked into. He zips up her coat and covers her ears with her beanie. Dreamily hums sound from deep in her throat, the sensual side of Erin speaking to his animalistic urges. Her glow in the wintry night sky the only star visible. "I have one more surprise for you," he growls, greedy for the glint in her eyes.
He steps aside, unveiling an open horse carriage. The coachman tips his hat, inviting the couple to climb aboard.
"Jay," Erin cries, her hands gripping his coat.
"You are deserving of all of this. I'm glad I'm the one who can give it to you."
Tears brim in her eyes, blurring her vision of him. Holding in a whimper, she manages, "I forgot my gloves again. I left them at the district."
"The best part about that is, I didn't."
They snuggle up under the complimentary throw blanket. Jay's hand finds her hip, and hers are preoccupied drinking a hot cider from a prepared thermos. He repeats to her the trivia facts the coachman is sharing. The carriage ride included a bonus night tour. The historical facts not of interest to her, but instead the silvery tone of his voice comforts her. Erin relaxes, finding his neck, and she inhales the scent that makes him inherently Jay. She is not able to resist it, resist him. She lays kisses on the underside of his jaw. The sensation of his stubble tickles her. The taste of his skin makes her suck harder. He groans low, and it entices her to find another spot. Her tongue traces the curve from his jaw to his neck. Goosebumps form due to the cold air and the trail she leaves. Exploring more proves difficult, his coat in her way. She shoves her thermos in his hand and moves to work on taking his coat off. Her mouth misses its intended target, ambushed with a plastic taste. "Drink up," he pushes the drink back into her hands.
Trotting and nickering sounds of the horses present a moment of stillness for them. Jay rests his head on top of hers, pulling up the blanket around them. Content, he cuddles her impossibly closer. She giggles in the type of laugh you do when you know that you got your way. In Erin's case, that is him. He happily plays along. Rather than reiterate facts from the tour, he teases in her ear all the naughty acts he wants to do to the woman he loves tonight.
The carriage continues its journey and moves to tootle by Lake Michigan. They pass through a park with multiple pop-ups and themed activities. Skipping the s'mores park-side community gathering, they select the Christmas toast.
"To my North Star," Erin clinks her wine glass to his. "No matter the insurmountable facets of my life, you always seem to find a way to guide me back to you." Jay's eyes paint over with adoration, and his color of blue shines spectacularly. "You are the brightest star in my galaxy," Erin cheers amorously.
Continuing their carriage ride, they tick past the outdoor icing skating rink. Erin affords him one gift early and mentions she bought tickets to a hockey game. Inspired by a few other couples entering the park's flower garden, they stop to meander through the footpath. Erin admires the peonies, a favorite of Jay's mother, speaking to them of her plan to lay a bouquet and light a candle for her. The last stops of their trek on the carriage are for street performers. First, to a solo saxophonist, and they are thoroughly impressed. Then, their personal favorite of the evening, orchestral renditions of classic Christmas songs. The couple cuddles up together, listening to the melodies. The fusion of the instruments adds magic to the night and picturesque images of the season.
By the time they arrived back at Erin's condo, it was more than well past midnight. The carriage ride ended, and after, on Jay's protest, they went to a restaurant. Because he did not want to cook, or order takeout. Jay's diversion earlier with his car breaking down was true. Stuck on the opposite end of town, without a way to drive home, they opted to call for a rideshare.
They hang up their coats and line their shoes. Erin yanks off her beanie and glove, handing them to Jay. She goes straight to the Christmas tree, gathering up a small paper gift box. He comes up behind her as she turns around. "For you," she runs her hand through her hair. The long day did not wear her down. The warm glow in the room washes over her, highlighting her subtleties. "You gonna take it," she rasps amusedly.
He steps up to her and opens the gift in her hand, glancing between the box and her. She bites her lip in anticipation of seeing him contain his reaction. He gazes back up at her. His aqua blue eyes mirror her green, dancing full of love.
"I went earlier in the month ... thought we could use one," Erin simply states. Jay delicately removes the gift from the box. Cradling it, he finds a spot for it.
His arm wraps over her shoulder, initiating their nightly routine. They grab a glass of water, munch on some dried snacks, brush their teeth, and change out of their clothes. Jay gets comfortable in bed, waiting for Erin. The main room lights turn off, leaving the table lamps on the nightstands and the cityscape coming through the curtains to light the room. He stretches his body out, relaxing. Her side of the bed empty. He moves to get up and check on her when he hears her.
"Jay, I forgot to give you one more gift," she calls from the living room. He perks up, "And what is that?"
"Me."
Erin's silky voice rushes blood straight to his groin. Curving into the wall in the walkway, Erin exposes herself from hiding, dressed in a dark green satin babydoll slip with a white lace V-neck bodice, the straps leading to an open back. Her short hair teased and ends curled. The movement of her hair tucking behind her ear directs his attention to the Christmas lights draped around her. She presses on a switch, and the multicolored lights illuminate her body. "Merry Christmas, Jay," she purrs, floating slowly over to him. He scoots against the headboard, his arms and legs springing wild to remove the sheet, to make room for her. She bends her knee to push up on the bed to straddle him.
"I'm your Christmas tree, hand-delivered," her hands rest on his shoulders, moving in closer.
"Your gift is under the tree. How excited are you to have your gift?" She strokes the column of his neck, caressing his throat. "All you do is unwrap it," her rasp deep, lust filled.
Jay wriggles underneath her, "No bow for my Christmas gift?" His hands fondle the straps.
"That's not where the bow is." Eyes almost jut out and his mouth agape with fixation, he forgets how to swallow. "My cat doesn't have your tongue yet, Jay. Why so quiet," her fingers massaging the back of his neck and behind his ear.
"Fuck, Erin," Jay latches onto her ass, forcing her to feel him.
"Yes," she keenly whines, arching her back. "Open your gift. Unwrap me." The moans and sighs escaping her feeds his drive. His body restricted and achingly hard.
"Does my gift have a card?"
"Sure, there's one," she whispers in his ear. "Where could it be, Jay?" Erin runs her hands down his arms.
"Oh, my God." His hands glide up her slip, her naked back, and around the lights. Her trembling body and open position make him double in length. His fingers dip in her cleavage, touching her soft creamy skin. His fingernails scratch across her nipples, and he moans when Erin grinds forward. Finding the paper, he drags it out, lingering his fingers on her breasts, the warm skin a home of their own.
"What does it say?" Her chest heaves, her eyes match the dark green material on her body.
"Jay's Christmas Wish," he breathes, his voice hoarse.
"Anything else?"
The card folds out, and his finger brushes over a metal object. His expression widens, noticing a key taped to the inside. This key undoubtedly to the condo, his key.
"Looks like I'm full of gifts tonight," her arms return to him, wrapping around his neck. "Most importantly, all Christmas trees need a star. Are you ready to top me?"
"Erin," he groans, his hands dig into any piece of her that he can grab.
She chuckles naughtily, and she brushes her lips over his, "By the way." Separating, she looks into the deep sea of his eyes, "I love you, too."
Jay seeks the depths of her gorgeous eyes. The fearless woman he stumbled upon on that faithful night is the same one in front of him right now.
"I know."
Joined laughter fills the room as he rolls forward and flips on top of her. Whispers of I love you's, sweet words, and future experiences together fuel their thirst for one another. They promise to spend all their days, forever like that.
A gleam winks in view. It serves as a reminder. Whether it be due to Christmas magic, luck, happenstance, or the symphony of all three events, they found one another. The round glass ornament dangles on the tree, reflecting their limbs surrounding each other, mouths wandering, and sounds of pleasure starting an intense night of lovemaking. Expressing what they know is certain, they are partners.
The End!
AN: OMG! I did it! ;u; my story is done. I cannot believe it. Crazy I made it to completion. I hope you like my Christmas story. Wow! Thank you everyone for reading and all that jazz. Thank you all for the advice, tips, feedback, and love of my story. My Linstead heart is full that I have something creative out here. As this being my first writing piece I'm amazed I survived insecurities.
As you can tell I'm a Christmas fan (music and movies, mostly). I def plan on writing at least one more fic, I had the idea of it before this one but when the Christmas season hit, I had to do this first. The next one is intended to be a one-shot -_-; I did not figure how writing could go for pages and this initial fic had me thinking it could be a one shot (how wrong was I, lol). I'll post the one-shot once it is fully completed. No set date. Thank you to all the lovely humans that favorite, follow, comment, and read this story. I feel so overjoyed getting a piece of virtual connection with you. AH! OMG. I did that.
The inspo to this fic was from for King & Country's Into the Silent Night. The carriage ride number I used for orchestral inspo was Ezinma's Drummer Bae (awesome!).
Stay safe out there :)