American Girls
by Sweetprincipale
Set in an alternate late season six. Spike can't believe he's this happy. He can't believe he's changed, she's changed, and that together they have this little bubble that hasn't burst yet. In over a century of looking for the real meaning of happiness and true love, he's found it in the most unlikely of places. It must be these American girls that have won his heart and his loyalty.
Author's Note: This time, unlike the other chapters, this picks up IMMEDIATELY from the last chapter.
Author's Second Note: The music of Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers provides the lyrics for multiple sections, they get all the credit. May I suggest "You Wreck Me Baby" for your listening enjoyment as you read?
Dedicated to:The people who like this little bit of sunshine, fluff, and Tom Petty.
Part V
Tonight we ride, right or wrong
Tonight we sail, on a radio song
Rescue me, should I go down
If I stay too long in trouble town
This is the guiltiest pleasure in the world. Sticking it to her ex. To Dru's ex, to my ex-tormentor, in all the ways that count. I could gloat and rub the salt in deep, twist the knife… I've already done that to him a few times, with various implements, but those are just physical wounds. I don't think he's ever really thought to himself that I'm more than just her piece of cold comfort. He probably thinks she lies there, whispering his name, imagining it's him, and I put up with the scraps.
He thinks I'm only hers 'cause she can't have the thing she really wants. Him.
Makes sense if he thinks it. I used to think it, too.
Not now though, as my hand lingers on the phone, not dialling yet.
"Do you think he's going to want much?" She bites her lip.
"If he wants paying, he'll get it," I say evenly.
I start to dial, then stop.
I'm having a hard time with this. I'm going to be… polite to the bastard. So we're not in bad with him. Well, so she's not, he an' I could be shoulder to shoulder on the same side of the line up, an' I'll always feel like I'm in bad with him. Couldn't give a toss. But for her, I'll keep a civil tongue in my head so she doesn't waste time worrying about his poor injured feelings. And so he plays ball and doesn't ask for cash we don't have, that we're carefully guarding up to put Dawn in school. I couldn't selfishly take that casth to get something I want if it means Dawn can't have her dreams, vampire or no.
I'm going to ask him nicely for the goods.
Bloody hell, what've these two done to me?
Oh, yeah, you wreck me, baby
You break me in two
But you move me, honey
Yes, you do
My fingers fly over the numbers, staring at the pad in the kitchen where we keep bits of info- numbers for all the important people, and the name of Dawnie's doctor, the name of the useless insurance firm, and the idiot mechanic. Down in tiny letters, like she wishes he didn't need to be there, is Angel's.
I'm going to be nice, I'm going to be polite, I'm going to be good- She lays her head on my back, arms around my waist. Is it me, or is she humming Mendelssohn? She probably doesn't know it's Mendelssohn, but still.
For her, it's utterly worth it.
"Buffy?" Angel's voice pops on the line, all breathless and rugged, pitifully eager. Can't fault him that, I would be the same if she called me. If we didn't live in the same house, wake up together each day, sleep together each night.
At the sound of his voice, she retreats, pain in her eyes, but she flashes me a dazzling smile. She wants this. Wants me to do this.
You have no idea how rewarding it is for her to rely on me. Savior of the world, relying on little ol' me. Humbling and scary as fuck.
Makes me feel like I could take on an entire army, slay a thousand warrior kings, and rip airplanes out of the sky. It's hard not to put all the bravado into my voice. " No, it's Spike."
Eager is gone. Accusatory and growly takes over. "What are you doing on Buffy's phone?"
I bite down a sharp, blistering bunch of choice words. He's gone all pharoah on me, hasn't he? Ruling the land of denial. "Lived here for months, as you know. This is my phone, too. More or less. Actually, that's why I rang. I was-"
"Your phone? Ha. I'm sorry, since when did sex toys have household privilges?"
That's right, you useless piece of forehead, I have sex with her. I'm her "toy", the thing what gets her off, nightly, sometimes more than once. And never, ever did anyone show such tenderness and curiosity, such love and brilliance, such utter bloody stamina to a "toy."
I don't say any of that. "She asked me to call, but if you want to insult me a little more first, that's fine. Gimme a time frame. Five minutes? Ten?" I'll put him down on the counter and go help with the dinner.
"If she wants to talk to me, why isn't she on the phone?" he asks in a tone that seems to ring with triumph.
How did anyone this dumb last so long? Oh wait, he got sent to Hell by my gorgeous girl a while back. Never mind. "She wants me to call you because you're the one who works with Wolfram and Hart."
"I don't - work with them. Exactly. I have a couple of lawyers I butt heads with."
"And I'm sure they come off worse for wear." What with that huge, bony plate aimed at 'em.
Angel's voice is cautious, as if he's not sure if he should take the compliment or if it's a veiled insult. Doesn't matter. I'm dirt on his shoes, a living reminder of the very worst things he's done, so he can't take anything from me without hate. "Uh. Yeah, they do. What does she want?"
"Buffy and I want some paperwork done, legally. No fakes, legal copies that would stand up in any court of law. Can your pet lawyers do that?"
"With their eyes shut. Probably by lunch, if I tell them in the morning."
Oh yes, we still love to be king of the castle, no matter what sort of castle it is. "Thanks, that'll be great. I need a social security card, passport, probably citizenship papers, birth certificate, driver's license, the works."
"For who?"
"Me!" Honestly, who did he think I'd be calling for? Never mind. He's stupid, already worked that out.
"WHAT?"
"That's been a real popular word lately," I chuckle. "Yeah, I couldn't believe it, either, but if I'm gonna be officially on the phone bill and mortgage, what not, I need those things."
There's silence. Such a long silence, I finally break it, "You there?"
"Why would she put you on the mortgage? What've you done to her?"
"I -"
"You've got her so snowed that she- no. A spell. You're controlling her! What are you doing, holding Dawn in the basement, Willow in some pit in the woods?"
The phone whips out of my hand so fast that I make a very unmanly squeak. Well, she's stealthy when she wants to be! But stealth is gone, and the Valkyrie in bare feet and sex-mussed hair is next to me, glowering into the phone with barely controlled anger in every ounce of that cute little body.
Any man with two brain cells to rub together would bow down or back away.
I get to hold her hand and watch the show.
Angel- well, that mousse must kill brain cells.
Now and again I get the feeling
Well if I don't win, I'm a gonna break even
Rescue me, should I go wrong
If I dig too deep, if I stay too long
"You can't make anything simple, can you?" Buffy hisses. "I ask Spike to call and see about the paperwork and I'm here, listening, and he did that! He did that exactly, just like I asked and who's making problems?!"
"Buffy, hi-"
"YOU! You, the 'good guy' in this scenario, are making problems. You think of Spike as the bad guy, which he is so totally not, and don't tell me about past deeds, mister, because I'll past deed you 'til you can't see straight!"
"Uh- I - uh, Buffy, I have to check to make sure -"
"I'm putting Spike back on the phone! He needs the papers, not me. Oh- and if you ever call him a sex toy again- I'll… I'll- Spike!" She looks at me, wild eyed.
"What, Luv?"
"What would I do?" she hisses frantically, hand over the mouthpiece.
"Hm. I can think of horribly deviant things, Pet, but not your style. Just leave him with a nice all-purpose threat."
"If you ever call him a 'sex toy' again, you'll be sorry. Like, really sorry, even for a man who has bicentennial's worth of guilt." She pushes the phone into my chest and storms back into the kitchen.
"Papers, please?" I say, suddenly wreathed in smiles.
Silence. Grunting. "Why?"
"It'll help in case there's an emergency. All right? I'll look after Dawn and the bills better if I don't have to start off provin' I'm even allowed to."
"Oh. Yeah. I guess."
It's like pulling an elephant's tusk out of treacle with this one. Think he was more quick to agree to things without a soul, but now he's gotta consider every bleedin' angle, in case it might make him seem too bad or feel too happy or, God forbid, not in charge of the whole ruddy world.
"What are you playing at, Spike? What's the goal? You're smarter than they think, under the cursing and beatings, the violent idiot you like to play."
"Aww, Peaches. That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me. No, wait. It was 'Take Dru and get out of my sight!'"
"Don't be cute. Answer."
"Marriage."
"Excuse me?"
"Gettin' deaf in your old age?"
"You can't be serious. She would never-"
"She already said yes. Not now. Someday."
"You're a vampire! You can't …"
"Have a real ceremony, real church, real insurance cards, and a proper will? No. Not without the papers. Don't matter, really. I think she'd have me if we exchanged rings in the backyard. But- her goal is for me to be Dawn's legal guardian if somethin' happens in the next two years."
"So… You want papers to be a legally bound baby-sitter?"
His voice just drips with mockery and condescension, scorn, too. It makes my fangs itch. I growl low and let it hang there.
Oh, yeah, you wreck me, baby
You break me in two
But you move me, honey
Yes, you do
I feel something else hanging there, too. Her hair, drifting across my shoulder. She's come to put her head on my shoulder- or come to listen to the idiot. Bit of both, probably.
"Spike?" A soft voice that I mentally classify as "pouty". She's being the sweet young seductress- which is Angelus' second favorite food, right after sweet young virgin. "We don't need him. If he's being difficult, we'll see what Willow can do. I mean, if he's not helpful like you are…" She weaves hands through my hair as she turns my head to hers, staring up at me with wide, innocent eyes, and yes- pouting. "Come on, Baby, let's go have dinner." Her voice is a blend of breathless and hot and bothered. Anyone with ears knows that I'm going to be the dessert.
She's a masterpiece, always has been, and she thought it was all the high school fashions or the blonde dye.
Nope.
She could have any man in the world, all she has to do is look at him like that.
She winks.
Think the way I helplessly purr and buck up against her wandering hands might have tipped her off.
I'll be the boy in the corduroy pants
You be the girl at the high school dance
Run with me wherever I go
And just play dumb, whatever you know
"Buffy? Buffy! Wait, wait. I...need a name, birthdate, photo. I'll get it done."
"Aww, Angel. Thank you. Thank the helpful vampire, Baby."
"Thanks, Chum," I say, laughter bubbling under the surface. "Get those things in the post in the morning. Nighty-night."
I put the phone down and look at her. "You are a very, very devious girl."
"I have a very, very good reason." She kisses me slowly, pulling me with her so I can keep tasting her, touching her as long as possible. Eventually, she escapes, giggling. "I think you like me a little bit bad."
"I think you like me when I'm the 'big good'," I chuckle.
"Mm. Very big. Very good. I think… I think dinner needs a few more minutes." She abruptly stops and presses me against the island in the kitchen, eyes gleaming and knees bending.
"Ohhhh. Ohhh, God, yes…" I pant unevenly when she pops me into her mouth.
"Yep. Very big," she pumps her hand around me speculatively, nuzzling all over. "Very good." Her lips capture me again and all I can do is moan and hold onto the Formica for dear life.
Oh, yeah, you wreck me, baby
You break me in two
But you move me, honey
Yes, you do
To be continued...
Author's End Note: Totally off-topic, but I'm also writing a Victorian-era paranormal mystery/romance. It's serialized and new novels come out each month. The first two are out and I'd love to share if you're a fan of that genre. Look for The Undertaker's Daughter: Dearly Departed on Kindle. Happy Haunting ;)