Chaz POV

We left right away, we all agreed that having the trigger words removed as soon as possible was in the best interest of everyone. I sat alone reliving the memories about K. I was so in my head that I didn't notice dad come sit next to me until he laid his hand on my shoulder.

"Don't blame yourself." I snorted,

"Like you ever took that advice." I sassed.

"I am working on forgiving myself, and you need to work on doing the same. I know from experience it will eat you alive." he smiled sadly at me as I eyed him with disdain. I could feel my anger start to get the better of me.

"What do you have to feel guilty for? You were brainwashed, you had no control of your actions. For five years I did everything they told me just to get away from the pain." I sneered at him.

"It was still my hands." he stated blandly, making me flinch. As it brought memories of the pain and death I inflicted on others. I knew my breathing picked up and I started shaking. "Chaz." he started but I didn't let him finish.

I bolted to talk with Shuri about removing my trigger words but really I was running away from memories. When we landed she took me straight to cryofreeze to have a safer environment when messing with my brain. She said that the procedure would take a month at the least to fix my head. I saw my Dad staring at me while I went under but he never said anything. I had hoped he would come talk to me like he did when I was younger. I wish he had called an even trade.

When I woke again it was a week later after treatment. I could feel the pressure that was on the memories for the first word was lifted. I felt like I could actually breathe when I thought about K. I still felt the guilt but I didn't feel like my word would affect me anymore. I saw Dad standing there watching from a distance looking just as guilt ridden as I felt for our conversation. Shuri was trying to ask me questions but I just kept staring at my Dad. I heard her huff in annoyance and leave the lab.

"I'm sorry." we both said at the same time, bringing a smile to our faces. I shook my head, "You have nothing to be sorry for, I was the one who snapped my cap and took it out on you."

"I triggered memories of Hydra didn't I?" I sighed "Then I should be apologizing, my little koala bear." I laughed,

"I thought we agreed I was too big to be called that."

"I asked, you never answered."

"Thank you Dad. Where is Uncle Steve?"

"Stevie had to go back, he had some things to do." I could see how uncomfortable Dad was.

"It is Hydra isn't it they want me back." I stood up to go but he grabbed my arm forcing me down on the table again.

"They will not get you again. I promise you Chaz I will keep you safe until my dying breath."

My head snapped towards him, "No! You can't die, I lost everyone, you can't die." I was panicking thinking about his death. He took my face in his hands.

"Chaz I promise I will do everything in my power to not die but I will protect you." I hugged him, and we stayed that way till Shuri came in.

"I see you made up with your father."

"Yes thank you Shuri. My first trigger word is lifted. I can feel the weight is gone."

"That is good. Only one word was deactivated?"

"Yes."

"Time to put you back in cryofreeze." I nodded my head and got back into the chamber.

The next time I awoke Shuri checked and this time two more words were deactivated. Shuri sent me to see my father while he was in a cafeteria. I found him in the throng of people.

"Dad!" his head snapped up from his food.

"Chaz! How is the head?" Standing up and hugging me patting my back.

"Two more down, seven more to go till I am truly free." He nodded and pushed food over towards me. I quickly delved into my food.

"Oh this is so good. I missed good food."

"I am glad you like it little wolf." I spun around quickly standing.

"Your Highness."

"Call me T'Challa please."

"Thank you T'Challa, for everything you have done for me and my family."

"How is the White Wolf and his cub?" he asked my father.

"I am good, Black Panther. My son has only seven words that can be activated."

"I will leave you to your lunch."

"Thank you." I sat down and continued eating.

"You remember when you were little and you decided that since we called you a koala bear that you needed to be held all the time?" my dad asked with a huge smile on his face. I chuckled. I didn't remember that but I could believe I did that.

"I remember you and Uncle Steve chasing me in the alleyways and you had to rescue me from the tickle monster that Uncle Steve turned into."

"That was near the time before I shipped out." I frowned,

"Yeah it was." happy mood long forgotten.

"Chaz I never signed up."

"What?"

"I never wanted to go to war, that was Steve he wanted to do his part. I just wanted to stay home and be with you. You are all I have left of Elizabeth, I never wanted to leave you. When the letter came saying I was drafted I panicked at first. I knew you would be safe with Stevie and Rebecca so I was okay. I knew that you would be cared for if anything ever happened to me. Obviously I was wrong Hydra got you."

"I always thought you signed up that you wanted to go to war." he shook his head.

"You were what kept me going after your mother died. It wasn't long after she died that I got drafted. I was so scared I would die and I didn't want you to live through that pain again."

"I'm sorry Dad, I always blamed you, I never thought… I thought you wanted away from me. I thought you didn't want me anymore." he put his arm around me.

"I will always want you Chaz. You are my son and I love you."

"I love you too Dad." he took me to a balcony overlooking the country. We sat there in silence just taking in the beauty of the land and enjoying each other's presence. We heard the footsteps of someone coming and turned to see who it is. Shuri came into view,

"I am sorry to interrupt but you need to go back to cryofreeze." I nodded, hugged my Dad and followed the princess. When I woke for the third time I only found that only one word was deactivated. And went right under again. When I woke the fourth time I had a total of seven trigger words deactivated I was ecstatic but my Dad wasn't there and Shuri was avoiding the questions about where he was. The beads she had lit up and I heard my Dad.

"Shuri I am just boarding the Quinjet. Can you tell Chaz that I love him and will try to be back soon." I raced out of the lab, ignoring Shuri's calls to come back. He was just climbing the ramp when I got there

"Dad!" I yelled as I ran to him into a hug. "Why are you leaving?" I could feel the old feelings of abandonment surfacing. He sighed and hugged me tighter.

"Hydra is causing a lot of problems and they are wanting to get you and I back. The rest of the Avengers need my help so I am going."

I shook my head, tightening my hold on him. "No you can't go, Hydra has more people like me they will capture you. You can't go." I felt him rubbing my back in a circle.

"Hey it will be okay. I am the Winter Soldier, the best assassin Hydra ever had. I can do this. Besides I have to watch Stevie's back you know how reckless he can be."

"Promise you will come back."

"I promise. I am with you till the end of the line."

"Till the end of the line." I released him and went back to the lab to be put under cryofreeze again hopefully this next time I will be cured.