Chapter 5: Match Point
Angela's wedding date coincides with the 6 month anniversary of their graduation. In the weeks leading up to the wedding, Lucy contemplates asking Gabe to be her date - he is kind, gorgeous, easy to be around - everything she should want in a romantic partner, but much like Emmett before him, she finds that when she's around him things just feel too flat for a romantic connection. Like he's almost too much like her and too easy to be around.
Of course, now that she's finally woken up to the fact that she has more than platonic feelings towards Tim, she realizes that he's become the point of comparison for her, whether she's known it or not. And that no one else comes close to his ability to light her up (or, frankly, piss her off). Though it's felt like they've been riding a roller coaster that neither one of them wants to be on thus far, Lucy knows in her heart that there is the potential for something much, much better for them - a Lucy and Tim where the walls have come down because they have finally found a way to be honest with each other, a Lucy and Tim where their pushing and pulling is back in sync in all the best ways, allowing them to connect and grow and evolve together through their unique ability to simultaneously challenge and support one another.
Thankfully, she and Gabe are both spared the unnecessary drama of her entangling him in her somehow both nonexistent and overly complicated love life when Lucy hears through the grapevine that one of Angela's former partners, a P3, has already scooped him up
She is normally a complete sucker for weddings, and would be counting the days until she can revel in Wesley's and Angela's love and dance the night away with her favorite people, regardless. But it's also the first time she's going to be seeing Tim since his transfer to Malibu; since she's come to terms with her feelings, but has continued to be unsure what to do with them. She is both giddy and anxious when she thinks about finally seeing him again, a small part of her hoping that the love and joy that is sure to be abundant at the wedding may somehow help them find their ways back to each other in whatever capacity, with the other part of her wondering if he'll even bother to speak to her given how completely crap things have been between them since her graduation.
And so she agonizes over whether she should try and scrounge up another date. What if Tim shows up with someone new? The thought causes her stomach to drop with dread, as she realizes it's a very real possibility that he has moved on; that he, unlike Lucy, hasn't spent the last month and a half acting like an angsty, confused teenager. Ultimately, the small flicker of hope that he, too, will show up on his own leads her to the decision to attend stag, escorted by Jackson and Isaac, who assure her she is their absolute favorite 3rd wheel.
And then she agonizes over finding the perfect, drop dead sexy dress that will somehow magically make Tim see her as something more than just his former Boot. Or that will at least garner her enough attention from the male species to procure a last minute cover if Tim does show up with a date. She finally settles on a dress that is the color of deep red wine splashed with a floral pattern of white flowers accented with black and gold. It's sleeveless with tiny straps and a plunging neckline, small cut outs on each side beginning just a bit above her hips that offer just a peek-a-boo before extending to the back to expose a 6 inch strip of golden skin between the bodice and long, flowing skirt of the dress. The dress leaves less to the imagination than she'd typically be willing to risk at a function with many of her work colleagues, but it makes her feel sexy, and desirable, and beautiful, and when she ventures out to get Jackson's opinion, his expression is enough to convince her she's made the right choice. He insists that she never wear anything other than the dress for the rest of her life, assuring her it's perfectly walking the line between drop dead sexy and classically elegant.
When the day of the wedding finally arrives, she has butterflies in her stomach. She takes the time to curl her already wavy hair into beach waves that she is sure will survive the length of the night, before clipping back one side and pulling her hair around to tumble down the opposite shoulder.
She meticulously applies her makeup, loving the way simple choices to accent and contour and highlight end up accentuating her best features, finishing the look off with a wine colored lipstick that perfectly matches the color of her dress.
She carefully slips into the dress and slides on a pair of dangly gold earrings, before stepping into a simple pair of nude heels, securing the straps around her ankles. She may or may not have briefly analyzed her shoe selection to determine which pair would get her to optimal dancing with Tim Bradford height, should the opportunity happen to arise.
Giving herself a final once over, she spins in front of the mirror, loving the way the skirt of the dress twirls with her movement, the silky material gently swishing around her legs. As she moves, she realizes that a piece of her DOD tattoo is just barely peeking out through one of the cut outs. She stops and stares at it, debating whether she should cover it up with foundation.
It had been Tim who had first planted the seed of seeing it as anything other than a reminder of her failure, of the worst day of her life, that day in the gym. The impact of that exchange hadn't been immediate; she had continued to meticulously cover the tattoo up for weeks and weeks after they had spoken. But the day that she would have been able to have it removed came and went. And gradually, she began to skip covering it up on occasion when she was running behind or distracted, until there were more days that she was not covering it than there were days that she was. Until finally, she had just stopped altogether, somewhere along the way accepting it as a part of the person she had become, being able to look at it and not see Caleb's leering face, but rather a symbol of her own strength and resilience, with the added bonus of being a final fuck you to that monster. She was still here, and he was in the ground.
Her fingers resting on the ink as she studies herself in the mirror, she decides against covering it up; it's unlikely anyone will notice it, and even if they do, unlikely they'll piece together what it is, with the little portion that is visible. Today is about moving forward, not backwards.
The weeks leading up to the wedding pass in a blur for Tim; his hands are more than full dealing with Wesley and Angela's mothers' demands, working with the wedding planner on last second logistical details, and constantly reassuring Angela that she has absolutely nothing to worry about. All of that on top of settling into his new job in Malibu.
Six months. It's what he's decided. It's entirely arbitrary, but it's what he's somehow convinced himself is a reasonably appropriate time to pass before he confesses to his former Rookie that he's pretty positive he's fallen head over heels in love with her, while also having to deal with the fact that he's pretty sure she hates his guts. And rightfully so. He's done little for make up for the fact that he failed to tell her about his promotion, and even less to make up for the fact that he's generally been a moody, unsupportive ass hat towards her since the day they met, though he does like to think he's had at least a few redeeming moments along the way.
It's a happy coincidence that the 6 month mark aligns with the wedding, and that Lucy will be in attendance at said wedding. And he has it on good authority that Lucy will not be attending with a date; being Man of Honor comes with some insider perks. And as eager as he is to finally hash this out with her, he knows he needs to time it right. He owes Angela his undivided focus on his duties during the ceremony and during dinner and the other planned portions of the reception. And without knowing how Lucy might react, how she's feeling toward him, he definitely does not want to risk ruining her night. He knows how much she loves the romance of weddings, of celebrating and dancing the night away with the people she loves, and he has no interest in taking a single second of that away from her. Not to mention that they hardly need the prying eyes of dozens of their co-workers to witness this conversation. But, at the same time, he doesn't have the patience in him to wait even a single second longer than he has to - it's been far too long already and he's at the end of his rope. He misses her desperately and he needs her back in his life, in whatever way, shape, or form that may take. So he'll wait until the evening is winding down before he pulls her away so they can finally talk, and he can finally be honest with her.
The wedding is absolutely beautiful, and Angela is literally glowing. As Angela and Wesley exchange their vows, Lucy tears up, the longing for someone to look at her the way Wesley is looking at Angela, for someone to share that kind of love with, taking her emotionally hostage. Reaching up to wipe her eyes, Lucy finds her gaze traveling over to where Tim is standing behind Angela and is shocked to find he is gazing right back at her with a softness that sends another pang of longing through Lucy's entire body. She offers him a small smile, hoping it's all the encouragement he'll need to track her down after the ceremony.
Despite enjoying every aspect of the ceremony and the company of some of her closest friends and colleagues, Lucy knows that she's being more than a little neurotic as the day progresses. The hopefulness she felt during the ceremony fades as the hours pass, and still no approach from Tim. She knows she could approach him herself, but he's Man of Honor, and she doesn't want to risk interrupting him at the wrong time.
So instead her eyes almost compulsively seek him out, no matter where he is in the crowd. She feels jealousy rise up in her chest as Tim leans in toward the extremely attractive wedding planner to review something on a clipboard, wondering if it's really necessary that they stand so close together. She finds him on the dance floor dutifully dancing with each and every one of Angela's bridesmaids and each and every female member of Angela's and Wesley's extended families, not appreciating that many are looking at him like they'd like to take him directly up to their hotel rooms after their dance wraps up. And also wondering how he had somehow managed to hide from her that Tim Bradford can dance. She supposes that maybe she should have suspected - there was no doubt that the man was comfortable in his skin, his every movement evidence of the ease with which he maneuvers his body, and yet somehow she'd had him pegged for the type that would be have to be dragged kicking and screaming out to the dance floor.
She feels that oh so familiar resentment and jealousy building up inside of her as the night progresses, once again wanting to be the center of his world, but instead finding herself relegated to the sidelines. Not that the sidelines are all bad. There are plenty of attractive single men to distract her, and Jackson and Nolan aren't exactly slackers on the dance floor either, so she does her best to push aside the emotional vortex that Tim Bradford has somehow become for her and enjoy the rest of the evening.
When he finally approaches her at the bar, the night is officially winding down. The DJ is announcing the final few tracks, and Angela and Wesley are making their final rounds to thank their guests. She takes him in, heart tightening at how he can be both so comfortingly familiar to her, every part of her wanting to be closer and more connected to him, while also triggering her to immediately put her guard up, now that she's aware of how entirely vulnerable her heart is to him.
At some point over the course of his night on the dance floor, he ditched his jacket and tie, his undone top buttons and rolled up sleeves giving him the air of a rogue GQ model that just happened to wander into Angela's wedding. Lucy swallows, idly reminding herself that pretty does not compensate for being an asshole.
"Hey, Boot." Tim internally cringes as soon as the words leave his mouth; he's nervous and the words escape out of habit, but he knows they are the absolute worst way to start this particular conversation.
Lucy arches an eyebrow at him, shoulders tensing as she corrects him, tersely, "Not your Boot anymore." Not a word from him all night, and this is how he chooses to approach her. She's tired and disappointed, her hopes that tonight could have been anything for the two of them almost completely dashed.
He raises his hands in surrender, an earnest expression accompanying his words, "Right, sorry. Lucy. Look… I don't want to fight."
Her expression softens and he's filled up with the warmth that her presence somehow always manages to ignite in him.
Before he can continue, they are interrupted by Gabe approaching the bar. He shakes Tim's hand in greeting, "Tim - hey - what an incredible night. Looks like you really came through for Angela."
He turns to greet Lucy next, the slight widening of his eyes not escaping Tim's notice as he takes her in, "Lucy. I - uh - Wow. You look amazing." His eyes narrow slightly at the hand Gabe places on the small of her back as he reaches around her to grab a few napkins from behind the bar, but Lucy doesn't so much as flinch, clearly completely comfortable with him.
And he's momentarily jealous of how easy things are between the two of them - no failed marriages, or serial killers, or exes that were friends, or superior-subordinate relationships to exponentially complicate things. How easy it is for him to tell Lucy how beautiful she looks, whereas Tim has spent the entire night attempting to scrape his jaw up off of the floor every time he sees her in that dress, untie his tongue, and work up the nerve to approach her.
As Gabriel wanders back to his date, Tim turns back to Lucy, "Can we talk?"
Lucy shrugs before she nods, but Tim doesn't miss the flicker of wariness that crosses her face. His heart clenches, as he wonders yet again whether he's doing the right thing, whether this is something they'll be able to come back from.
He gestures to her to follow him along the back wall of the reception hall until they reach a door that opens into the back hallway. Once the door has thudded shut behind them, Tim offers Lucy his hand and she stares at it, momentarily dumbfounded, the gesture so completely foreign between the two of them. She shakes herself and accepts it, sliding her hand into his and feeling an immediate and unexpected, yet familiar, rush of comfort and connection from the physical contact.
He pulls her down the corridor past the various set up and prep areas that were used by the various vendors and into the beautiful suite the bridal party had leveraged to get ready before the ceremony. He pulls her through the room and onto a large terrace with a balcony overlooking the hotel's courtyard. The music and lights from the reception are escaping through open doors on the reception hall terrace to their left, but they are the only people in sight and it feels like they are in their own little word.