...
"Son of a bitch." Tony Stark remarked, staring at the glowing mini-triangle before him. The scorch marks on the other side, on the wall, ignored. "It actually worked." He added on, whistling as he walked closer to the small piece of metal.
When the smoke obscured his view, he promptly turned on the LED glasses he had on- not that it really helped, given they were from a Stark gift-shop, but he figured it made him look cooler.
"Jarvis, clear the air, I can't actually see anything else."
"Affirmative, sir."
With a mechanical whirl, the indoor smoke-filter promptly sucked in the smoke, allowing him to get a better view of the element.
"Run diagnostic tests on- Hmm..." He put a single finger on his chin. "Do you think dad would get pissed if I named his discovery-" Because it really was his discovery. "-Badassium?"
"I don't believe he'd sue you over it,"
He shrugged at that, "You clearly didn't know the man. He'd probably want to call it something stupid, like Starkium."
"Or Tony." Another voice echoed out from behind him.
The words caused him to stiffen, immediately turning around on the spot, his hand held out as an Iron-man metal palm promptly flew towards him, fitting into his hand with ease.
When he took in the stranger from the Statue, his nerves calmed themselves down, though he kept the palm up.
"Sir, there seems to be an intruder in the facility,"
Well, no shit.
His gaze locked onto the slowly closing orange portal behind the man, his mind running miles a second as he tried to figure out how the... thing worked...
"Shall I call security?"
"I am security," He deadpanned, before finally taking note of the man himself, and the obscenely strange purple markings on his forehead.
He definitely didn't remember those.
"Ooh, you really do work fast!" The stranger chuckled with approval.
"New tattoo?" He questioned, slowly lowering his hand as the stranger promptly walked towards the large table showcasing the origins of the element he'd rediscovered.
The same table the stranger before him had reminded him about.
The stranger blinked once at the words before turning his gaze towards him, the bemused expression on his face quickly disappearing as he shook his head.
"Not really, this is just what happens when you use your brain as a temporary gateway for an eldritch abomination. Should disappear in a few days' time."
"...Come again?" He couldn't help the question, slowly walking towards the man.
The stranger blinked again, recognizing the look on his face currently questioning his seeming lack of logic.
It was the same one he showed most of the people he interacted with.
Well, most of the Stark Industries board members.
"Well, I wasn't going to use the earth itself as the gateway, now was I? Would've cracked the planet in half."
He blinked in response.
"Eldritch Abomination?"
"Names Dormammu- well, Daisymoo now. Still trying to get that patented. Though not entirely happy with it to be honest."
He blinked again.
"Start over, from the top. Why did you invite an eldritch abomination into your head?" Because evidently, he himself believed in that now...
"Only way I could seal him into a cow."
"Right." He deadpanned in response. "Why?"
"He eats worlds."
He nodded in response.
"Jarvis, do you have a number for a mental institute?"
"Not currently, sir."
Well, there goes that plan.
Plan B it is.
He needed a drink.
...
"...So let me get this straight." He started off, idly nursing the glass in his hands as he stared at the stranger currently prancing around from one device to another in his laboratory. "You invited a dimensional-traveling eldritch monster into your head, beat it in a battle of willpower, and then sealed it, once again through magic, into a cow to protect the world?"
"Yes."
"Because a wizard asked for your help."
"Yup." The stranger picked up a no-longer in-use iron man helmet and proceeded to have a staring contest with it.
"And then that wizard," He couldn't help the emphasis on the word, "As a reward, gave you a ring that lets you teleport around the world, completely disregarding the laws of physics?"
"That's about it." The stranger mumbled, before placing the iron-man helmet down.
"...Okay, one question."
"Shoot."
"How'd you know, you'd win the- uh, whole willpower thing? Because I am guessing it wouldn't have gone well if you'd lost."
"Oh, that's easy. He went in with the mindset that he should win because he's a great big evil bla bla bla, and I went with the firm idea that losing to a fictional entity was too stupid to even consider."
"...But he's not fictional?"
"No."
"But you convinced yourself he was?"
"Something like that."
"Huh."
"Say, think I could grab a glass?"
"Knock yourself out." He was definitely trying to knock himself out. A small part of him was hoping he'd just wake up and find out it was all a dream.
On the one hand, it'd mean he hasn't found a possible cure yet, on the other... He wouldn't have had this conversation.
Arguably, both had equal advantages.
"Cool." The stranger's nonchalance didn't help.
It was always fun knowing that, despite being a nuclear deterrent, he couldn't be a stupidity one.
Honestly, what sort of society agrees with the plan he'd just heard?
...
"So, wizards are real? Magic's real?" He settled on asking, having taken everything else so far in stride.
He couldn't help but wonder how S.H.I.E.L.D, particularly Nick Fury could've missed the fact there was an entire culture of physics defiers living in the city.
"No other explanation for the crap they pulled." The other answered with ease.
If he hadn't seen the kind of crap the other had pulled so far, from evidently teleporting into his private lab, to somehow knowing things he had no right knowing, particularly the fact he was slowly been poisoned, he wouldn't have believed a word of it.
"And... What, are you supposed to be Harry Potter?"
"You've read Harry Potter?" The other questioned incredulously as if the idea he'd read anything was impossible. Or maybe the idea that he could read?
Either way, he was rightfully insulted.
"Pepper has." He defended himself, before taking another gulp of his drink.
"Ah. Well, no, I am not Harry Potter."
"I figured, it was a rhetorical-"
"Met his dad though."
"..." He levelled a stare at the stranger.
"What?" The other questioned, bemused.
He kept on staring.
...
"So, I've explained Dormammu, the existence of wizards, the 'tattoo,' my previous housemate-"
He refused to even consider believing the last part of that statement.
Even he had his limits, but for the simple fact the other had helped him avoid death by Arc Reactor, he'd give him the benefit of doubt and ignore it.
"What do you think?" The other questioned, a big grin on his face.
"You stole my laptop."
The stranger blinked.
He really should ask for his name.
He's spoken to him more than most of the, well, everyone he's ever interacted with- Though he never really asked for their names either... They just tended to give it to him themselves, and he tended to forget them.
"I needed cash. Drinking ain't cheap." The other shrugged.
He blinked.
He sold, a state of the art laptop, to get drunk?
Once again, he wasn't sure whether to be amused or insulted.
"You could've just asked me for some. Your vague descriptions certainly helped me out."
"You weren't in your office."
"Could've waited."
"It was happy hour."
"...Touche."
"Really?"
"Of course not, you robbed me!"
"If it's any consolation, I wiped the hard-drive."
That, admittedly enough, was. Not that he'd ever admit to it.
No one needed to know what he searched for online whilst in his office.
"That doesn't make me feel better."
Truthfully, he couldn't really care less.
He was, despite the... absurdity of everything he'd witnessed so far, actually enjoying the other's company.
"Huh. Sucks to be you right now then." The other stated with a straight face.
"...You have no social skills whatsoever."
"Coming from you?"
"...Touche."
Still, time to get to the crux of the matter. Though, in all honestly, he'd rather just have another drink-
"Why are you here anyway?"
"To give you some advice."
He blinked in response.
Not exactly what he'd expected-
"About what?"
"Pepper."
"...What about her?" He questioned, opening up another bottle.
"You should really stop screwing around and, just, you know, get together or something? I am not entirely sure at what point of the... uh. Just ask her out properly, will you? It'll make you happier."
He definitely didn't want to have this conversation.
With a stranger no less-
He promptly froze, his eyes widening the slightest.
Oh gods, what if he wasn't a stranger!?
"...You're not my son from the future are you?" He questioned, quickly pouring himself another drink.
"...What?"
Oh, good. He can make him speechless too.
Also, judging by the completely baffled expression, double good as he wasn't responsible for the... presumably, human, before him.
That tattoo made it rather hard to consider him human. The stories so far, even more so.
Evidently, even the so-called wizards had been creeped out.
"Nevermind." He waved the question away. "Why Pepper?"
He had his own reasons for sure, but he'd certainly like to hear a third perspective-
"Because she hasn't run away in fright from you yet?"
"...I am very successful."
"Your chest's made of metal."
He downed the drink in hand.
He certainly made a compelling case.
...
"So," He started, idly noting the fact that over an hour had passed since he'd learnt that his lab wasn't wizard-proof. "That all you came here to do? Tell me to get a girlfriend?" He questioned, somewhat amused.
"Not really."
He perked up, idly raising his head off the chair's head-rest.
"Oh? What else you got?"
So far he'd found out about...
A lot. He'd found out about a lot-
Most of them were thoughts that would've never crossed his mind before-
A small part of him was confused as to why he was willing to believe most of it in truth.
"There's a Russian physicist, capable of making his own Arc-reactor, out to kill you. Or, will be at any rate."
"...Why didn't you start with that one? Exactly?"
"Would you have?"
"...That's beside the point- Are you sure you're not my future son?"
"Very sure."
He let out a sigh at the confirmatio-
"You have a daughter in the future."
"...You're fucking with me aren't you?"
"You name her Happy."
"..."
He levelled another stare at the stranger, his hands deftly taking the bottle and glass away from him. "You can have more when you behave."
The stranger rolled his eyes.
"I am kidding about that one-" He breathed out the sigh of relief- "You name her Morgan."
"That's it. You're officially cut off."
...
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