"Jade? Are you there?"

My throat felt like I swallowed a bucket full of gravel and washed it down with hot lava.

"Jade I know it's you. Prank calls don't really work when I've got your number programmed into my phone." She had that high-pitched squeak to her voice that she always got when she was nervous or upset. At least I was getting in her head as I fumbled over myself to try and speak.

Say something, dumbass!

I cleared my throat. It was like coughing up thumbtacks. "It's not a prank," I snapped. "I had something caught in my throat."

"Oh. What?"

My stupidity.

"I'm eating a sandwich if you must know." The tightness in my chest came back the moment I lied to her. Are you seriously having an anxiety attack over this? You're pathetic.

"Well I'm glad you're not choking," Tori said, the squeaky edge fading a bit. "So, what's up? I'm surprised to hear from you."

"Not half as surprised as I am to be calling you."

"Why are you calling me? Did you lose a bet?"

There just enough snark in her voice to both impress and annoy me. Snark was my thing, but Vega wore it pretty well sometimes. "I'm getting to that," I said. "Geez. Are you in a hurry? Can't even ask me how I'm doing or anything? Just cut right to the chase?"

She sighed. Was that irritation I heard in her voice? "Hi Jade, how have you been?"

"None of your business."

Okay, the irritation in that sigh was unmistakable. "Gee, I didn't see that one coming." The high-pitched edge was back. "Well as much fun as this has been, I need to go and…do literally anything else right now. It was nice hearing from you—"

"Wait," I said, not without a hint of aggression. And by a hint, I mean a lot. "I need to talk to you about something."

I heard a soft whimper, the same one I heard a million times over the years. She brought it out anytime she was bracing herself for something she didn't think she'd like. Just a short, sad, weird little noise. It was honestly kind of cute.

I hated cute. Usually.

"Okay," she said. "I'm listening."

"An interesting opportunity fell into my lap recently," I said, choosing my words carefully. "I'm directing a short film for this small production company."

Just like that, the dark clouds were gone. Tori practically squealed at me. "Oh, that's so awesome! I'm so happy for you!" Despite all the shit I just gave her, there was genuine enthusiasm in her voice. I couldn't wrap my brain around it. How could she be so happy for someone that just dumped all over her?

It was that insufferable something about her. I couldn't get away from it, even on the phone.

You know what it is, Jade. "I'm not done," I shot back impatiently, trying to drown out my inner voice. "The film is just to prove that the studio can handle a mainstream production, since they usually do horror movies. After reading the script…well…" Come on, Jade. Spit it out. You've worked with her before. "I think you'd be perfect for the lead role."

A long silence fell between us. All I could hear was a faint ringing in my ears that came and went with each rapid heartbeat. Why isn't she saying something? She's going to say no. She's going to laugh at me. Ha, ha, Jade. Real funny. No way.

"What's the role?"

"Does it matter? It's the lead."

"Yeah, it kinda does," she said. "How do I know you're not setting me up for something I can't do? Are there stunts? Songs? Who's the girl?"

They were all perfectly reasonable questions, but of course, my reaction to them wasn't. I knew it. I'd been aware for a while that I struggled with "reasonable" when it came to Tori. I bit back all the scathing remarks I wanted to throw her way, opting to try and end the conversation as quickly as possible.

"Fine," I huffed. "Her name is Sara and she's pretty much you when you first came to Hollywood Arts. Smart and pretty and completely clueless." I regretted that the moment I said it.

"Aww," she cooed. "You thought I was smart and pretty?"

I swear to chrysler, I couldn't have chosen a worse way to describe the character. I was off my game. Way off. "As usual, you're missing the point. Focus, please. Sara's basically a cake eater who's had everything delivered to her on a silver platter. So the central conflict is that she has to grow beyond that, to fight for something she wants that can't just be handed to her. And ever since I read the script I just…I can't see anyone else but you in the part. Believe me, I've tried. Like, a lot." I paused briefly to let that sink in. Time for the closing pitch. It had to be personal. "I don't know what you've got going on right now with school, but it would mean a lot to me if you'd come out for a week or two and be in this thing. I'd consider it a personal favor. I'd even owe you one."

It was a decent performance. Except that somewhere in my head, I knew it wasn't really a performance at all. I meant every word of it. And it irritated the hell out of me. You see why she's so frustrating to me? Everything is so damn complicated with her.

The silence returned between us. I was crawling out of my skin by this point. I stood up and started pacing. My palms started sweating. Every second felt like ten or twenty.

Why won't she answer? Just tell me no and get it over with.

"If it's that important to you, then okay. I'd love to do it."

I stopped pacing. The edges of my mouth twitched and before I knew it I was wearing a smile. A stupid goddamn smile .

"Okay. Cool," I said as nonchalantly as I could.

"I can transfer the credits I'm taking this semester to online options, so long as you can promise me I'll have some time to work on my assignments while I'm there."

"Jeez, already making demands," I quipped. I broke out the movie star voice Tori hated so much. "Golly, will you need anything else during your stay? Licorice or soda pop or happy unicorns?"

Tori's reaction never disappointed. "I still don't talk like that!" she whined. "But now that you mention it, I'd like my dressing room to have four bowls of M&Ms separated by color."

"You're joking."

"You want me to be in this thing or not?"

I wanted to tell her, "not" and call her bluff. I wanted to tell her I saw through her shit and that she could take her M&M's and...

But no, I needed her.

For the movie.

I needed her for the movie . So I let it go. Part of me even smiled inwardly at her persistence. Demands like that were way out of character for her. Maybe she was learning something. "Fine," I said. "Anything else your majesty?"

"Yep. I expect a hug when I see you. An emphatic, excited one. No friendly punches in the arm."

"How about a friendly punch in the face?" I muttered with a groan. Tori's preoccupation with hugs drove me nuts.

They only drive you nuts because you like them. Which is why you always let her—

Have you ever wanted to punch your own inner monologue? I have. Especially at that moment.

"What was that?"

Out came the movie star voice. "I said I just can't wait to give you a big old squeeze!"

"I'll believe it when I feel it," she said flatly. "When do you need me out there?"

I took a quick look at the calendar on my PearPad. "Can you be here by next Friday? Does that give you enough time to do what you need to do for your credits?"

"Sure, that works. I guess I'll see you then. I'll send you details about my flight when I have them. Send me the script when you can."

"All right." I hesitated and the silence stretched between us again.

"Anything else?" she asked.

I felt like I should say something more, but I didn't know what. "I, uh…I mean…what you're doing…"

"You're welcome, Jade. See you soon."

The call ended, but I kept the phone to my ear. She knew that I was trying to thank her. She knew it, and she responded without making me say it. God help me, I appreciated her insight even as I resented the fact that she had it.

You see? Complicated. Way too complicated.

"Looking forward to it," I said absently to no one in particular.

It was the damnedest thing, though. I really was looking forward to it.

What the hell is wrong with me?