Week 3: Sleep — May 17: There is only one bed / post-war -AND- May 21: May 21: napping together / sleep deprived | prompts by KakaSaku-Haven on tumblr
"Wait, how did you end up homeless?" Sakura thought it a fair enough question but was loath to relay the pathetic series of events that led to her standing outside Kakashi's front door begging for a place to stay.
It had begun with an innocent enough thought: she should move to a new apartment. The damage her current building and neighborhood suffered during the war was still glaringly obvious, even two years later. And while just a handful of months ago she would have adamantly denied any connection or correlation with her current and on-going struggle with disrupted sleep, she had reached her limit: she was starting to exhibit serious signs of sleep deprivation and involuntary micro-napping has no place in a hospital. No, it was time to accept that the constant reminders of the war were at play in her nightmare-infested dreamscapes and all signs indicated her PTSD would only worsen the longer she stayed put.
The nightmares had been getting worse, in stages, for so long that she couldn't recall exactly when she realized that just the sight of her building, now sagging and crumbling with poorly patched stucco, had her breaking out into a cold sweat. Sakura thought that even if moving didn't cure her nightmares, it certainly couldn't make the situation any worse. And she missed feeling joy and relief at the first glimpse of home after a long shift at the hospital.
Having always thrived under the structure of a task and firm deadline, Sakura attacked the real estate section of the Konoha Times with gusto. She found a cozy apartment a block from the hospital and far away from any signs of war. She'd booked the movers, and secured a truck, broke her current lease, and signed off on her new one. Everything was progressing perfectly.
She didn't realize her mistake until it was too late: the movers had loaded up her truck and were off to their next appointment when Sakura took out her phone to check when she was scheduled to pick up the key to her new place. As she stared at the event notification, she felt the weight of all the moving fatigue and nightmare-laden nights and felt her stomach plummet at the realization: in her sleep-deprived state, she'd gotten her days mixed up; she thought her move-in date was on the 12th but it was actually the 21st. And having already surrendered her key, she couldn't even squat in her old apartment.
Every item she owned was packed up snug in her rental truck, and she had nowhere to go.
This is how she found herself at Kakashi's place. He was her only friend with a house and a proper driveway. She didn't want to street park her truck and risk vandalism or theft, so that ruled out everyone else she knew.
She supposed she should have started with the backstory, but it felt imperative to relay as quickly as possible once Kakashi opened his door the embarrassing crux of the matter: she was homeless for the next 9 days.
Closing her eyes in a gesture of general defeat, Sakura let out a sigh that sounded alarmingly close to a whimper as she answered Kakashi's question. "I got the dates mixed up on when my new lease starts." She felt the blush rising up her neck.
Bracing her shoulders, Sakura raised her eyes from their inspection of her scuffed shoes to catch Kakashi's eyes. To her mortification she felt her lip wobble and tears form in her eyes. She was just so damn exhausted, and Kakashi's familiar, reassuring presence was making her all the more aware of just how long it had been since she felt truly safe.
With a startled and slightly alarmed look as he took in all the signs of impending tears, Kakashi quickly ushered Sakura into his apartment and steered her towards the couch, gently nudging her to take a seat. He mumbled something about tea before disappearing quickly into the kitchen. Sakura inhaled the familiar scent of pine, scorched earth, and dogs and felt something loosen in her chest.
When Kakashi returned with two steaming cups of mint tea, Sakura was staring sightlessly at the far wall where the late afternoon light cast long shadows. Clearing his throat slightly to rouse her, Sakura blinked out of her trance and raised a sheepish smile up to him. Passing her a warm mug, he rather needlessly cautioned, "Be careful, it's hot." He took the seat next to her and felt her slide slightly into him as the couch cushions dipped under his weight. Sakura didn't seem to mind and pressed a little more firmly into his side as she blew softly at her tea.
"Thank you for the tea, and letting me sit for a moment. Even if I can't stay here, I really appreciate this little rest."
Glancing down at her head, which was angled precariously close to his shoulder and seemed to be losing its fight against gravity, Kakashi quietly enquired, "You aren't sleeping?" It sounded more like an acknowledgment of fact than a question, so Sakura just nodded her head in agreement.
"How long has this been going on?" She took a few sips of her drink before leaning forward and gently placing the cup on the coffee table. Leaning back, she gave into temptation and laid her head on his shoulder before whispering, "Too long."
As he looked thoughtfully at the top of her head, now resting heavily against his arm, Kakashi tried to remember the last time he'd seen her energized and brimming with life. When had he started to catalog the different and deepening shadows under her eyes? He had assumed the cause was overworking at the hospital; however, everyone knew better than to try to persuade a medical prodigy with fearsome fists to work less. He hadn't considered the issue being the ability to sleep or, as he rather suspected, the ability to stay asleep.
To his mind, there was never any doubt about letting her crash at his place; she was one of his most precious people and the least he could do was offer her a roof over her head. Contemplating her scrunched position between the arm rest and his side, Kakashi made up his mind; he stood and scooped Sakura up. She grunted softly at his liberty but lacked even the energy to open her eyes to glare at him. His concern deepened. Hefting her up further against his chest, Kakashi strode to his bedroom and gently laid Sakura down on his bed.
With a flick of his wrist, he settled a blanket over her before stepping away to resume his afternoon of laying on his couch with Icha Icha. Or at least he tried to step away; just as he made to move, Sakura's hand shot out, faster than he thought possible in her exhausted state, and held firmly onto his wrist. Glancing from where she held him up to her face, he was greeted with a particularly pitiful expression and sad-yet-hopeful eyes, "Will you stay with me? I...I'm so tired of trying to fight off the nightmares by myself."
He knew the unique anguish of tortured sleep and the double pain of facing it alone. He supposed a mid-afternoon nap wouldn't hurt and, if he could provide one of his best friends comfort while doing so, all the better. He gave a slight nod and motioned for her to move over. She sent him a wide, watery smile as she quickly made room for him. Laying out with his arms folded behind his head, Sakura scooted closer, pressing the length of her body against his and resting her head on his shoulder. As she succumbed to her exhaustion, Sakura's last coherent thought was about how happy she was that Kakashi didn't have a guest room.