Chapter 5: It's the United States

It was already evening, about 8 o'clock. Kazuma and Megumin invited the officer inside.

"Mom, dad! I'm home!"

Tsuyoshi and Kumiko came into the living room and were surprised by the man in uniform, who had taken a seat on the sofa.

"I take it that you are Satou Tsuyoshi and Satou Kumiko? I'm an officer with the United States Air Force. I'm sure you have many questions."

Kumiko turned to the officer.

"I've never met an American who spoke Japanese so well, sir."

Kazuma thought about it. His mother was right: the officer's Japanese was nearly perfect.

"You can call me McAllen, no need to address me as sir."

McAllen began to explain what had happened.

"Your son and his…"

McAllen paused, unsure of the relationship between them. Megumin butted in.

"...girlfriend…"

McAllen continued.

"... used a fishing boat to produce a nuclear-scale explosion out at sea. Due to what I can only assume to be careful planning, no one was killed despite the size of the blast. The crews of the ships nearby reported hearing loss, but their symptoms disappeared quickly."

Eris must have healed them. It was the only explanation Kazuma could think of.

"I'd assume that Megumin here was responsible for both the explosion magic and the logistics, and that Kazuma here was just tagging along."

Ugh, Kazuma thought. How did the officer know that he wasn't the one who cast the spell? Was it really the mage outfit and staff?

"Actually, Kazuma was the one who did all the planning. I just cast my explosion magic. I'm not actually that good at planning when it comes to my explosions… some might even call me a bit trigger happy."

Kazuma was shocked. What was this? Megumin admitting to being trigger happy? Impossible.

"As a military man, I can understand the temptation that comes with such a powerful weapon. 100 kilotons is no joke."

So apparently Kazuma's math had been right. McAllen went back to explaining.

"The United States Air Force was notified shortly after the blast by sources in Japan that the suspects were a young man and a wizard. The military has contingency plans for dealing with magic users, and we put those into effect. We had three main options. The first would be an assassination…"

Hey, Kazuma thought. That's my girlfriend you're talking about, mister! Wait, why was he getting so riled up over a hypothetical? His parents and Megumin also looked concerned.

"...to immediately eliminate the threat. This would be a last resort however. Our second option would be to keep her detained, and ensure that no bad actors could recruit her. A rogue state with a living nuke would be a geopolitical disaster. For the third option I'd like to propose… I want to speak with Megumin alone."

"Not happening. Kazuma gets to stay or we don't talk."

"All right. Tsuyoshi, Kumiko, I'm sorry about this, but you'll have to leave us for a while."

Kazuma's parents shrugged and headed upstairs. Megumin turned to McAllen.

"Kazuma's told me quite a bit about modern geopolitics, especially when it comes to nuclear weapons. You won't need to dumb anything down."

"All right. To start off, you're from another world, aren't you Megumin?"

"I am, but I'm surprised you came to that conclusion."

"What other conclusion could I have come to? Humans from this world can't use magic, and they certainly can't use nuclear-level explosion magic. Unless you were some sort of genetically engineered supersoldier…"

"You're actually not far off the mark. She's from another world and comes from a race of genetically engineered super-mages."

Kazuma and Megumin then proceeded, again, to tell their story from the other world. They only gave a quick recap, though, and left out a few unsavory details. He didn't seem to think any parts of their story were less believable than Megumin's nuclear-level explosion, which Kazuma supposed made sense.

"Hmmm… how intriguing… I hope you don't mind, but I'd like to see her eyes glowing. It would be a great military asset if we could give ordinary humans such a trait."

Kazuma didn't see any reason why not, and Megumin didn't really know how to respond.

"Sure. Hey, Megumin! Check this out."

He dimmed the lights and then took out his phone. He pulled up a video of the Tsar Bomba, the 50 megaton nuke created by the Soviet Union in the early 1960's. Megumin instantly turned her head to watch.

"Pretty cool, right Megumin?"

She totally ignored him. All her attention was dedicated to watching the nuclear test. As expected, Megumin's eyes started to glow and the whole room was bathed in a dim red light.

"Her eyes glow when she's excited, you see."

"Ah."

But the glow kept getting brighter. Kazuma had never seen her eyes so bright, and he was kind of jealous. McAllen whispered to Kazuma.

"Y'know, I think your girlfriend might have a fetish for nuclear weapons."

Kazuma couldn't even deny McAllen's outrageous claim. He hissed back in response.

"And you don't think I figured that out already?! I'm getting NTR'd over here by the Soviet Union!"

The video finally ended, and after a few seconds of awkward silence Megumin got up to undim the lights.

"Wait, aren't we going to discuss the wonderful thing you just showed me, Kazuma?"

"No, Megumin. I just figured it was the best way to get your eyes to glow on demand. Was I wrong?"

Despite being disturbed by her apparent interest in nuclear weapons, McAllen turned to Megumin.

"I have an offer I'd like to make. After hearing your story, I think that this proposal is in both of our best interests. I'd like to offer you a job in the United States Air Force research division. Your role would be to, as you'd put it, continue to walk the path of explosions on behalf of the United States military."

Megumin looked absolutely elated, but she let McAllen finish.

"We'll provide you with whatever resources you need to advance your research. Because of your powers, you're a high value target for assassination or kidnapping by enemies of the United States. The Air Force is well equipped to protect you, and your identity will remain highly classified. Finally, the Air Force will pay for accommodations anywhere in the United States. Name the city, and it can be arranged."

"New York. I have one condition, however. Kazuma gets to come with me."

Kazuma was a bit shocked by the whole thing. Megumin had replied to McAllen's proposal pretty much immediately. Why New York, Kazuma wondered. Oh, right. She didn't know any other American cities. He wasn't about to complain, though. New York wasn't a bad choice.

"Kazuma can come as well. Do you have any interest in working for the Air Force?"

Kazuma thought about his question. He definitely wasn't the type to go work for the military of his own accord, but he was a bit worried for Megumin.

"Megumin can't read or write, and she only speaks Japanese. Won't she need a translator and someone to do her paperwork for her? At least until she learns English?"

Kazuma's English wasn't great, but it was probably good enough for the job.

"Kazuma can be my secretary!"

"Do you really have to phrase it like that? I accept, but still."

"Well, that settles it. Your flight leaves tomorrow morning."

Kazuma quickly ran upstairs to get his parents and his brother. Once the whole family was gathered, Kazuma began to explain.

"We've agreed to work for the United States Air Force…"

"...and our flight to New York leaves tomorrow morning."

Megumin had finished his sentence. Yamato, of course, had no clue what was happening.

"My dear Kazuma, are you sure about this?"

"Megumin wouldn't be safe in Japan. If we could stay, we would. But the chance of her being kidnapped or killed is just too high."

"We understand, my son. We just hope that we can visit you, that's all."

"And Kazuma, now that you two have jobs, you could get…"

"Okay, okay, I get it, mom!"

Sheesh. Kazuma wished his mother would relax for once.

"Kazuma is taking his magic girlfriend to America?! No fair!"

Kazuma turned to his little brother. He'd mess with him, just a little.

"Hey kid, there are plenty more where she came from. Just get hit by a truck and find a cute Crimson Demon girl!"

Kazuma looked at Megumin. She probably didn't find his comment all that funny. But Megumin still wanted to mess with Yamato.

"It's really not that hard. Even your idiot brother managed to do it."

Yamato looked like he was seriously considering it when Kumiko spoke up.

"Yamato, please don't kill yourself for such a stupid reason or your dear brother won't have any nieces or nephews. You'll just have to settle for a normal Japanese girl."

Kazuma felt bad, to be honest. Had he gone too far? The laughter he was barely holding back told him that the answer was no.

"It has been an honor to meet the Satou family, but I must be going. Get some rest, you two. I'll be here in the morning to escort you on your flight."

Tsuyoshi turned to face McAllen.

"Thank you for everything. We had no idea how much danger Megumin was in. We're truly grateful. But please, make sure they're safe and that they call home."

"It's the least I can do. Thank you for your hospitality. Take care."

McAllen proceeded to leave, and Kazuma went to heat up some ramen. He only took out two packages, since the rest of the family had already eaten. Megumin was once more overly enthused with the ramen, while Kazuma found the familiar taste comforting yet dull.

They were even more tired than yesterday. After quickly showering, they soon found themselves tossing and turning. They were both anxious about their journey to America, but they eventually managed to fall asleep.