The elevator ride was silent but you could hear everyone staring nervously at Alex who was sat on the wheelchair very weakly. When the doors opened, you could see the queue for CT, it was very long but they didn't have the time. Luckily, Bailey had paged Chief Hunt so they could get to be first in line.

"It is free at the moment." He said running towards them.

April, Jackson, Lexie and Mark were all stood in the line and stared at the young man looking so defenceless with their jaws basically on the floor.

"Do you have any metal on you Alex?" Owen asked.

He merely shook his head and they went into the CT room. Meredith and Bailey helped him onto the bed and he laid down. Teddy sorted out his IVs and took off his oxygen.

"Your gonna be okay Alex, it should take around 30 minutes to finish and if you really need to come out then just say." Derek said.

They all left the room and shut the door behind them.

"Okay we are starting now." Teddy said.

The bed he was laid moved into the loud machine. It was so loud and it was very enclosed.

Flashback

"Please don't hurt him James." His mom pleaded.

"I'll do what I want you can't tell me what to do!" His dad shouted.

He walked over to a terrified 6 year old Alex and slapped him as hard as he could.

"Daddy?" Alex sobbed.

"James!"

Alex's dad hit him 8 more times before locking him in the cupboard.

"Daddy! It's dark in her please!"

"No you can stay in there forever for all I care, your not my son, I have you Alexander! Alexander freakin' Karev."

Alex sobbed in the dark room, he was only 6 years old. He stayed locked in that cupboard for 2 days until his mom was able to rescue him.

End Flashback

Alex was screaming at the top of his lungs with tears streaming down his face and sobs taking over his body.

"Get him out of there!" Derek screamed.

The bed moved out of the machine to show Alex hyperventilating, crying and shaking uncontrollably.

"Someone get him an oxygen mask."

Meredith came running into the room with Cristina shortly behind them. She shot straight to him and held his hand tightly. Derek quickly placed an oxygen mask over his face. Alex's entire body was tense, he was hardly breathing, tears streamed off his face from his glazed eyes and his chest was rising up and down at 100 miles per hour.

"Alex, just breathe in and out. Your safe." Meredith said.

He was trying to sit up but Cristina held him down with one of her arms. 5 minutes later his breathing wasn't the best but he could breathe again. Derek, Teddy, Hunt, Bailey, Meredith and Cristina were all stood around the machine and him. Alex was already half asleep after his bad PTSD panic attack.

"Let's get him back up to his room." Hunt whispered.

"Alex, are you okay to go back up to your room?" Meredith asked.

He nodded his head and tried to sit up but he couldn't. Meredith and Cristina sat him up slowly. Alex managed to stand up for a few seconds before he started to fall, luckily Derek was able to catch him in time and sat him down on the wheelchair.

Alex felt too ill to be embarrassed by this point, most of his work colleagues had just seen him have a huge panic attack. They all walked out of the room and straight into the elevator at the end of the short corridor. It was a complete blur for Alex until they arrived at the room and Cristina snapped him out of it when she spoke to him.

"Alex?" She asked placing her hand on his shoulder.

At the sudden touch he flinched and his breath hitched. Cristina let go as soon as she felt him move,

"It's okay, let's get you in bed."

Alex was in a far distant place so Owen and Derek tried to pick him up but the second they touched him he shouted.

"Don't touch me!" He shouted.

"Alex?"

"YOU CANT HURT ME AND MOM ANYMORE! GET AWAY FROM ME, STOP HITTING US, STOP PUNCHING US, STOP LOCKING US IN A FREAKING CUPBOARDS FOR DAYS UPON DAYS!" He screamed.

He was stuck in another flashback, everyone just stood in silence waiting for it to end.

"I'm done! You are an alcoholic druggie who has ruined our lives. I am only 15 years old and I am the one who has to take care of the entire family, you haven't even come to see us in 3 years. Mom can't do anything anymore I have to do it ALL. For Aaron and Amber as well, that should be your job. I have to study, have a childhood but you took that away like you take little pieces of me away. I have scars from you, I can't stay in small rooms, elevators are absolute hell. I hate you and get out of this house!" He shouted.

Meredith grabbed hold of Alex's shoulders, he was stood up now. As soon as Meredith hugged him he snapped out of the flashback and broke down.

"Meredith." He sobbed.

"I have you Alex, he can't hurt you anymore."

Meredith laid Alex down on the bed,

"Can you give us a minute?" She asked to the crowd of doctors behind her.

They all left the room shutting the door behind them but still watching from the window. Meredith laid next to Alex on the bed and hugged him.

"Your okay, your safe Alex."

Alex wasn't hyperventilating anymore which was good but Meredith still placed an oxygen mask over his face to try control his shallow breathing.

"I can't...carry on...Meredith...it hurts too...much."

"Your a fighter Alex, you have fought this entire time, you are much stronger than you think you are. You need to start taking anti-depressants or something especially now, I will help you all that you want but you have to ask for help." Meredith said listening to his breath begin calm.

"Tired."

"You have just had 2 PTSD panic attacks, they're draining, you go to sleep."

"Please don't leave me."

"I'm not going to, I am going to go outside to talk to the others for a minute before you go to sleep."

"Okay." He yawned wiping the tears off his face.

Meredith stood up and changed his oxygen to a cannula before walking outside.

"He is broken and quite possibly suicidal."

"What?" Cristina said shocked.

"I know, he is saying he can't carry on and everything hurts too much, I don't know what to do anymore."

"Meredith, you go stay with him and help him for now and we'll sort something out for the future to prevent something like that happening." Derek said hugging her.

"Okay thank you."

Meredith let go and walked back into Alex's room where he was crying again. Meredith sat down on the bed and he jumped out of his skin,

"It's okay, it's only me."

She laid down on the bed beside him and he placed his head on Meredith's stomach. She stroked his hair and fell asleep looking peaceful but inside he was far from at peace. He was snoring ever so slightly as Cristina walked in and sat beside them on the aqua coloured chair. She was looking terrified which was rare for her,

"Meredith, you sleep."

Meredith was exhausted so she fell straight asleep.

Meredith slept soundly for 4 hours until she woke up to see Alex vomiting into a basin that Cristina was holding as she rubbed his back. She quickly stood up maybe too fast because she had to hold onto the bed to steady herself. Bailey was stood next to Cristina looking extremely worried, he finished and collapsed back against the bed. He looked possibly more exhausted than before. Alex was still crying so his eyes were red and puffy.

"Your okay Alex, what do you need?" Meredith asked sitting back down next to the shivering man.

"Cold...pain."

Before Meredith could say anything Bailey interrupted her,

"He can have some more morphine now Alex?"

He nodded and Bailey went to find some and tell Owen. Meredith went and got some blankets and covers to see if that could warm him up.

"How is that?"

"A...bit better."

Bailey ran back in and injected the morphine straight into his cannula on his hand.

"That should start working in a few minutes. Owen said that you have to eat an entire meal or he is going to have to put you on a feeding tube, you haven't eaten for an entire week and you've lost 12 pounds."

"I'm not hungry."

"We know but you need to eat, dinner is coming around in 20 minutes I'll get you something from there." Meredith said as Alex put his head back on her stomach.

"I'm really not hungry, I never am."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm never hungry, most of the time I just force myself to eat so that I have some form of nutrition in me."

"Okay Alex, you go back to sleep and I'll wake you when your dinner is here." Meredith said rubbing his hair.

Just the smell of food woke Alex up, the smell of tomato soup. Awful.

"Alex, Alex, your dinner is here." Meredith said tapping him slightly on the shoulder.

After a few minute Alex had come around enough to be sat up. Mer sat the bed up and adjusted his pillows carefully. Cristina put the small table across the bed and then tucked in to her dinner.

"Go on Alex just a little bit?"

"Okay." He sighed.

Alex picked up the spoon with his shaking hand and placed it in the red soup. He brought the spoon back up to his mouth and took a sip of it. Alex did that maybe 10 more times before placing the spoon on the tray and picked up the bread roll. Alex tried to eat it but the nausea took over. He quickly placed the bread roll back down on the tray and weakly reached out for the bucket beside the bed. He leant forward and threw up.

"Hey, hey, hey your alright." Meredith said moving the table away from the bed.

Meredith rubbed his back for him gently and sighed. Each time he coughed it rattled his chest. When he finished Cristina went and cleaned the bucket and Alex was bent over his aching stomach. Meredith ran out of the room and got a heat pack from one of the nurses.

"Lay back down." She said.

Alex did as she said and Meredith lifted up his shirt. She placed the heat pack on and pulled his shirt back down. Alex fell asleep once again snoring slightly as Cristina walked back in the room.

"He isn't getting any better Mer."

"I know."

"I don't know what we could even do, I have one idea but it is very drastic."

"I don't think we're quite at that point yet."

"Do you actually think he is depressed or suicidal?"

"Why do you think he acts so coldly towards everyone?"

"He isn't evil spawn he's depressed spawn."

Meredith laughed slightly and started to eat her own food.

"Owen said something about maybe keeping him and you off work for another month. He said it wouldn't effect your ours because of the nature of it all. What do you think?"

"He probably needs it and he can't be alone so a good idea."

"Is he panting or is it just me?"

"No he is."

Alex's chest was going up and down as his cheeks were becoming more and more red.

"Should we wake him?"

"Yes."

"Alex, Alex wake up for us, Alex."

Alex's eyes shot open and he quickly grabbed hold of his chest.

"Alex?"

"Hurts..." He panted.

"Page Teddy Cristina!"

Owen and Bailey walked in the room but stopped when saw what was happening.

"What's happened?"

"He was asleep and his breathing was laboured so we woke him up and now is chest hurts."

"Push 5mg of morphine and turn up his oxygen. We need to get him into CT but I don't think we can, order a chest X-ray and and EKG."

"Okay." Bailey said.

"Mer...sick." He whispered.

Meredith quickly grabbed a basin and placed it back on his bed, he was curled up in the foetal position scared to move or breathe. He slightly leant forward and threw up for the 100th time. Meredith did the usual and rubbed his back until he sat back again.

A few hours later all the tests had been done and his pain had gone away marginally.

"All the tests were clear Alex."

"Okay." He sighed.

"We can't do much more except let you rest."