Disclaimer: I do not own Hero Academia/Boku No Hero Academia, or any other property in this work that I did not make myself.
Mineta tries flirting with...
Chapter five: Rich Protection
The audience that had been summoned to the theater room by Talespinner69 had just finished watching the fourth episode of the realm where, once per episode, Minoru Mineta tries flirting with one of the girls in his year of the hero course at UA. So far, the short grape boy has had no luck at all to speak of, but he's holding out hope that the him in the realm that everyone was watching would succeed.
"Hey, I just noticed something," Monoma began.
"No one cares," Bakugo replied dryly. The blonde boy of class 1-B was about to object, but he got shut down quickly by his classmates Juzo and Yosetsu.
Stretching her arms into the air, Mina said, "Man, this show has been great to watch so far!"
Turning to regard Mina, Izuku said, "Normally I'd object to people stating they enjoy watching a lone specific person get thrown through the wringer. But since Mineta very clearly could stand to have a much better attitude towards you and the other girls, I can understand why you would say something along those lines."
Aizawa nodded in agreement. "Yeah, Mineta's attitude towards the girls isn't the best in the world. I'm thinking about signing him up for therapy to get to the bottom of what makes him tick."
"Or just let us ladies blow off some steam by pummeling the little purple turd whenever he acts like Pepé Le Pew," Mirko remarked from where she and Ryukyu sat in the audience.
With a dry look on his face, Kotaro turned his attention to Mirko. "...How do you even know who that is?"
"It doesn't matter," Tale said with a gentle shake of his head, "Mostly because we got the next episode of the realm ready to go."
"I wonder how the girl of the episode will end up rejecting Mineta," Hagakure remarked in a very amused tone.
Turning to look at Hagakure, Mineta said, "You mean you wonder how I win over the girl of the episode."
"Ha ha, no she doesn't," Kyoka corrected in a dry, self-amused tone as the episode started.
...
(Mineta tries flirting with Momo Yaoyorozu)
"Ooh, so Yaomomo is the fifth girl in question," Mina in the audience said.
Shivering with revulsion, Yaoyorozu remarked, "Uhhg, I am not going to enjoy seeing Mineta try to make moves on me."
"Oh come on," Mineta said, "You know you'll like it if you give me a chance!"
It was a well enough morning at UA, where class 1-A were in their homeroom. They were getting back graded tests from the last big test they did. After getting back their assignments, Sero, Kirishima, and Kaminari were discussing their papers; Kirishima got a B+ while the other two both got Bs. "That test was a bit tougher than the last major assignment we did," Sero remarked as he looked at his B.
"But look at it like this," Kaminari said, "The fact the three of us are now regularly pulling in grades above the C level means were doing better overall." Looking at his B grade which was accompanied by a sticker of Pixie-Bob, Kaminari said, "I'll take my victories where I can get them."
"It's actually nice to see the boys doing better in school and being proud of how they've improved," Aizawa in the audience remarked, "I like it."
"I like how I'm now getting decent grades," Kaminari said.
As the three boys talked, they were approached by their classmate Mineta, who gave off an air of self-amused pride. "Behold, gentlemen!" Mineta declared, "I have improved!" He then showed the guys his test he got back, which showed a D- with a sticker of Present Mic. "This is a step up from the F- that I got previously!"
"Technically yes," Kaminari replied, "Now imagine if you were to completely break yourself of your lewd doujinshi addiction and use all of that time otherwise on studying. You're supposed to be in the top half of the class in terms of grades, but you've gotten pretty bad as of late."
"Similar to how I'd be proud of Kaminari and the others improving," Aizawa in the audience began, "I'd also express concern about Mineta's grades dropping."
"Why am I the sticker for D-minus?!" Hizashi exclaimed.
"At least you're better than Endeavor," Mirko said to Hizashi, prompting the flame hero to hang his head in shame.
As the boys talked, they stopped short when they heard their classmate Yaoyorozu cheer excitedly. Looking over, the boys saw Yaoyorozu, accompanied by Uraraka and Tsuyu, show them her test. "I'm back to getting an A+, girls!" Yaoyorozu said.
"You just had a slightly off day when you got an A rather than an A+ kero," Tsuyu commented, "There's no shame in having a slightly off day from time to time."
Putting her test away, Yaoyorozu said, "Well I do like to maintain a standard."
As the girls continued to talk, Mineta turned to face the boys he was with. "Did I mention it that Yaoyorozu is the next girl that I got my eyes on?"
Sighing in a resigned tone, Yaoyorozu in the audience said, "I am not going to enjoy seeing Mineta try to creep on me."
"I do not-"
"Yes you do," Mina interrupted Mineta before he could finish.
"Bruh, you with all due respect stand no chance with Yaoyorozu," Kaminari began to explain, "Aside from the fact that she's got a rep for looks and smarts, I heard rumor that she's got-"
Pointing his right index finger up into the air in a dramatic fashion to cut Kaminari off, Mineta said, "I shall prove that any boy should he try hard enough can get the girl!"
Sighing, Kaminari said, "Just try not to get hurt. Seriously, your tally of trips to Recovery Girl's office is starting to catch up really quickly to Izuku's tally."
"Wow, thanks for reminding me, Kaminari," Izuku in the audience said in a depressed tone.
"Sorry," Kaminari apologized.
...
Later, Mineta was making his way to the class 1-A dorm building, as he was intending to make moves on Yaoyorozu. "Time to show Momo the business," Mineta said aloud but to himself, "And by the business I mean-"
Mineta was cut off when he was rushed by a group of four men in black suits and sunglasses, who beat him up then tied him up with rope before hauling him off. They then tossed Mineta into the trunk of a limo parked outside of UA, with the least burly man in the group saying to Mineta, "The Yaoyorozu conglomerate sends its regards."
The trunk was then slammed shut, the men got into the limo and drove off, made their way to a warehouse near the coast, dragged Mineta into the warehouse after getting him out of the trunk, tied him to a support post inside, then took turns whacking him in the gut with baseball bats, because one of them said that they couldn't leave marks on Mineta's face.
After about ten minutes of this, the men dropped their bats, leaving Mineta gasping in pain. "You will be leaving miss Yaoyorozu alone now," the slender man said threateningly, "Capisce?" Mineta couldn't respond as he was coughing and crying in pain.
"Did Yaoyorozu seriously get gangsters to kidnap Mineta," Aizawa in the audience began, "Take him to a secluded location, and beat him up to discourage trying to go after her?"
Mina, with a look of realization on her face, said, "Oh yeah. Yaoyorozu has the power of money. She can come up with all manner of schemes to make Mineta leave her alone as budget won't exactly be an issue to her."
Gesturing to the big theater screen, Yaoyorozu said, "I wouldn't go as far as what's presented here, but I should consider ideas on getting the point across to Mineta."
...
Several hours later, Mineta was still tied to that post in the warehouse when Aizawa and Hizashi by chance wandered into the warehouse and found him. "Mineta?" Aizawa said in a tone of surprise, "What are you doing here?"
"Yeah, this warehouse is in the area Sho and I patrol when we aren't doing our work as UA teachers," Hizashi pointed out.
Coughing in pain, Mineta was able to cry out, "Yaoyorozu got the mafia to kidnap me, tie me to this post, whack me in the gut with bats, then just leave me here!"
Both men looked too confused to try questioning anything, so they just got Mineta down and proceeded to take him back to UA.
"I was left there for several hours until the senseis came upon me randomly during a patrol?!" Mineta in the audience exclaimed.
Shrugging, Aizawa said, "Yeah, that's a clear sign in this realm that the way you treat the girls could be better."
"Who knows how long Mineta would have been there if it hadn't been for Sho and I coming upon him," Hizashi said, "Especially taking into account how he undoubtedly has injuries that might be a threat to his life in the long run if not treated soon."
...
The next day, Mineta who was treated for his injuries by Recovery Girl was back at it with trying to go after Yaoyorozu. He just had to be careful with avoiding Yaoyorozu's gangster pals from yesterday is all. Taking advantage of the fact that the girls were all occupied, Mineta figured he'd be able to learn what made Yaoyorozu tick by taking a look at her dorm room.
"He's going to search my dorm room while I'm away?!" Yaoyorozu in the audience exclaimed in disgust.
At that time, Mineta was pelted by objects thrown at him by the other girls. "Ow! Ow! Ow!" Mineta cried out in pain.
Sneaking his way inside, Mineta saw that Yaoyorozu's bed no longer took up most of the space in the dorm room; it was now approximately the same size as the beds the other class 1-A students had. "Oh yeah," Mineta remarked to himself as he observed Yaoyorozu's bed, "She got a smaller one at the suggestion of the other girls because there was no need for the super big one that took up most of the space in here."
Looking around, Mineta spotted a fancy wooden wardrobe up against the wall opposite of the foot end of Yaoyorozu's bed. Mineta went right over to it and opened it up; when he did, he saw a number of photos taped to the back behind all of the clothes. To Mineta's piqued curiosity, they were all photos of Yosetsu Awase of class 1-B.
"...Ain't he the welder guy who helped Momo with sticking that tracker on the Nomu when the training camp was attacked?" Mineta said to himself.
"Momo has a stalker shrine dedicated to Awase in this realm?" Itsuka in the audience remarked in a confused tone.
Turning to face Yosetsu, Juzo asked, "Hey man, don't you have a crush on Yaoyorozu?"
Nodding in confirmation, Yosetsu replied, "Yeah, and although I would be at least a smidge creeped out if she had a shrine like that for real, I'd still like it to hear that Momo likes me back."
"The shrine won't happen, trust me," Yaoyorozu said, a bit embarrassed, "Although it is nice to hear a respectable guy likes me."
"Hey, I like you," Mineta said to his rich classmate.
"She said respectable, dumbass," Spinner scolded.
As Mineta looked on in confusion, he heard some talking going on outside. Acting quickly, Mineta jumped into Yaoyorozu's wardrobe, closed the door behind him, and hid under a pile of stuffed animals that was in the wardrobe. A few seconds later, Yaoyorozu entered her dorm room with Tsuyu and Uraraka following her.
"About time you realized that your old bed took up way too much space," Uraraka commented.
"Yes, the extra space does help," Yaoyorozu commented.
"That's an excellent point," Mina in the audience said, "Yaoyorozu, why did you even think that your usual style of bed would fit in a dorm room? UA isn't the kind of mansion that you are used to living in."
Sighing in an embarrassed tone, Yaoyorozu admitted, "I guess it's force of habit."
As the girls talked, Mineta where he hid was able to take out his phone and shoot a text to Kaminari, asking him to distract everyone in class by any means necessary. A few moments after Mineta shot the text to Kaminari, there was a knock on Yaoyorozu's dorm room door. Yaoyorozu got up to answer it, and there Mina was.
"Girls! Kaminari is riding a unicycle while juggling flaming bowling pins!" Mina exclaimed in clear amused excitement.
...
Down in the main area of the dorm building, Kaminari really was riding a unicycle while juggling flaming bowling pins as he said, "Look at me! Look at me! Look at me!" Most of his classmates, as well as both Aizawa and Hizashi, were watching the show.
...
"You girls gotta come see!" Mina said, getting the girls to all come with her, leaving the room empty.
"That's...that's one hell of a distraction, I suppose," Kaminari in the audience said, a bit surprised to see how he answered Mineta's request for a distraction.
"But did Mineta here even tell you why he needed a distraction to occupy all of us?" Kyoka asked suspiciously.
Shrugging, Tale said from where he and Kotaro stood in front of the big theater screen, "I think that all he said in the text was that he need a distraction."
While the girls were gone, Mineta breathed a sigh of relief. As he was moving to leave the wardrobe, Mineta's hand felt upon something laying on the bottom of the wardrobe. His eyes widened as he could tell it was a pair of underwear, even though the lack of light prevented him from being able to see it. "Yaomomo's underwear?" Mineta said quietly to himself.
Acting quickly, Mineta stuffed the pair of underwear he found in Yaoyorozu's wardrobe into his pocket and made his way out of the wardrobe and out of Yaoyorozu's room, glad that no one was around to see him.
"He stole a pair of my underwear?!" Yaoyorozu exclaimed in horrified disgust.
Folding his arms over his chest, Aizawa said, "Yeah, that would not be something I'd let him off lightly for if I caught wind of it."
"Well at least I for real am smart enough to not let people catch wind of it," Mineta remarked.
...
Later that evening, Sero, Kaminari, Kirishima, and oddly enough Tokoyami who had Dark Shadow out were all eating dinner at the island counter in the kitchen area of the class 1-A dorm building when Mineta was talking to them. "Wait, that's why you needed the distraction earlier?" Kaminari asked after eating a bite of baked chicken breast.
"Sneaking into Yaoyorozu's room and hiding in her wardrobe," Kirishima said in a disappointed tone, "That sounds hella unmanly if you ask me."
"Well I was just trying to find out what made her tick so I can try flirting with her better," Mineta said, "Although as I hid I found a pair of underwear in her wardrobe."
Sero looked up from his dinner, looked straight at Mineta. "...You didn't."
"He did, the little pervert," Kyoka in the audience scoffed bitterly.
"Eww," Yaoyorozu said as she shuddered, "If he stole a pair of my underwear for real like that, I'd consider siccing the mafia on him for real!"
Nodding in confirmation, Mineta said, "Oh, I did indeed." Reaching into his pocket, Mineta pulled something out with out looking and said, "Behold, gentlemen! Yaoyorozu's underwear!"
The boys all looked like they were about to object, but they all calmed down and proceeded to look confused. "...Mineta, that's a pair of boy's underwear," Tokoyami pointed out dryly. With a mildly confused look on his face, Mineta looked at what he was presenting to his fellow boys, and indeed saw that it was a pair of boy's underwear.
"...The hell?" Mineta said, roughly at the same time Izuku came in, followed by class 1-B boys Juzo and Yosetsu.
"Hey guys," Izuku said, "Juzo and Yosetsu are here to help with the project aimed to try to foster better relations between-"
"The fuck?!" Yosetsu interrupted, "Mineta!" The short perverted grape boy turned to look at Yosetsu as he snapped, "The hell do you think you're doing with a pair of my underwear?!"
"Those are Yosetsu's underwear that Mineta has?" Izuku in the audience said in confusion.
Sighing in a resigned tone, Mineta said, "This is going to end oh so well for me."
"Your underwear?" Mineta replied, looking confused and a bit worried.
"Mineta says he stole it," Dark Shadow commented casually.
Before Mineta could object, Yosetsu shouted, "You son of a bitch!" before he proceeded to start chasing Mineta, who ran for dear life. Both Izuku and Juzo proceeded to chase after the welding boy of class 1-B to try to get him to calm down.
While the chasing was going on, Kaminari said, "You know boys, something bothers me."
"Something bothers me here?" Kaminari in the audience said rhetorically.
"Maybe the pieces are falling together in his head," Spinner commented.
"What's up, dude?" Kirishima asked.
Pointing to where Mineta was being chased by Yosetsu as Izuku and Juzo tried to get him to calm down, Kaminari said, "Mineta claims that he found that pair of underwear of Yosetsu's in Yaoyorozu's wardrobe which, if true, means that she was the one really in possession of it."
"So?" Sero replied.
Shrugging, Kaminari said, "Well that begs the question. What would Yaoyorozu be doing with a pair of Yosetsu's underwear?"
FIN
Folding her arms over her chest, Mina said, "Well Yaomomo in this realm does have that shrine in her wardrobe dedicated to Awase."
"I am so sorry about that, Awase," Yaoyorozu apologized, looking very embarrassed.
Laughing it off a bit, Yosetsu replied, "It's, umm, okay. And I really still like you, so going that far won't be necessary."
Sighing, Mineta said, "I can't believe that I really didn't get a pair of Yao-" Mineta was cut off when the girls all threw stuff at him, making him cry out in pain.
Turning to look at Tale, Kotaro said, "He's having an awful lot of bad luck, you know." Tale nodded in agreement, not having much else to say on the matter.
END OF CHAPTER
Author's notes;
Well that's the fifth girl taken care of, leaving just eight more. I wanted to show Yaoyorozu using some of her wealth to deal with Mineta, as well as make reference to her oversized bed in her dorm room by replacing it with one that's more size appropriate. But more on that later. Here's hoping the next chapter will be just as good as the average here.