After his break down, Jay calmed a little. He sat down, sinking his thoughts. Will had had to go back to work but he had promised to come back immediately if he would get any information. Platt had gone back to the district, Williams with him to handle their case. Others refused to leave and sat with Jay at the waiting room. Kim leaned against Adam, her eyes red for all the crying. Vanessa and Kevin had sat on either side of Jay as if trying to keep him together.

"Wanna coffee?", Kevin asked Jay.

"No, thanks. I don't think I can get anything down."

"Okay. Just say if there is anything we can do for you". Kevin looked at his friend. He could see Jay was still on edge, and Kevin wanted to do everything he could to keep him from falling.

"Yeah. Thanks. I don't know if anyone can help… I just need Hailey to be okay", Jay answered, his voice raspy.

"I know, bro, I know. We all need that. But our girl is a fighter, she's gonna beat this." Kevin put his hand on Jay's shoulder, giving him light squeeze.

Jay gave Kevin a little smile, the first since Platt had come to seek him, and nodded a little.

To Jay, it felt like they had been waiting for days. It killed him to think that Hailey was in surgery, fighting for her life. When he had told Will that he can't live without Hailey, he had meant it. He would live, but it wouldn't be real life, real living. Hailey had, like secretly, become a center of his universe. Jay did not care how cliche it was, but Hailey was his other half. Without Hailey, he wouldn't be whole. Without Hailey, he would lose his course again and get lost, just like he had been before Hailey had entered his life guiding him back to the track. Hailey couldn't die. She couldn't. He wanted to marry Hailey and get old with her. Have a kid, or maybe two. Little girl with blonde curls and freckles. Boy with bright blue eyes. For a long time, he had not been able to imagine getting married or having kids. Now, he couldn't think we wouldn't get all that. All the package, Hailey's and his version of the whole white picket fence dream.

Jay woke up from his thoughts, when Will and the man, who he assumed to be a surgeon, arrived at the waiting room. Jay bounced up, trying to read Will. Did he look relieved?

"I have been told that you are Miss Upton's next of kin. The surgery was successful, damage was smaller than expected and we were able to repair it entirely. Blood loss was the biggest problem, but we had performed transfusion and Miss Upton's condition is stable and I don't expect it to weaken anymore", dark haired surgeon told.

"Can I see her?" Jay asked.

"She is still under anesthesia, and will be at ICU as a precaution until next morning, but since you are her next of kin, you can visit there. Others have to wait until tomorrow", the surgeon answered.

"Thank you, thank you for saving Hailey", Jay thanked the surgeon.

Jay took a deep breath and turned to look at his team. Kim threw herself in his arms and hugged him tight.

"I knew she would make it. Give her our love when she wakes up", she prompted.

Vanessa waited her turn to hug Jay and Kevin followed her. Adam patted Jay's back. Everyone was so relieved and smiles plastered across their faces.

"Thank you for staying and being here with me. It means a lot", Jay told them. "Someone call to Platt and let her know everything went okay. Williams is in charge with the case. Right now, Hailey is my priority."

"Of course, Sarge. You are needed here, we keep the fort upright. Tell Hailey we love her and come to see her right away we are alĺowed to come", Adam reassured him.

After the team had left, Will hugged Jay tight and escorted him to the ICU. When he opened the door of Hailey's patient room, Jay gasped involuntarily. Hailey was lying on the bed, wires and tubes surrounding her. She looked so small, so pale. Jay had thought that he hated being in the hospital, but it dawned to him that he hated it even more seeing Hailey as a patient.

Jay leaped to Hailey. He touched her hand carefully.

"Hailey. Baby. I'm so sorry…" Tears welled up in his eyes again.

Will patted Jay on the shoulder. "Everything is good now. It would take her little to wake, but you can stay here. I'll take care of it, nobody tries to send you away."

Jay looked at his brother gratefully. "Thank you Will, for everything"

"Always for you little brother. And for Hailey", Will hugged him. "I have to go, but tell nurses to call me, if you need anything."

Jay nodded to him, leaned to give a light kiss to Hailey's forehead and pulled the chair closer to the bed before sitting down. He wasn't going anywhere.

Jay did not know how long he had sat there, holding Hailey's hand and hearing her peaceful breath and whispering to her how much he loved her, how much he needed her. Probably hours, it might have been a night already. It calmed to hear her breathe so steady. Hailey was alive. Nothing else matters. Whatever was coming, they would get over it together.

The nurses had come and gone. Will had visited and brought Jay coffee and water bottles with some energy bars.

Hailey's surgeon came in, and checked her chart. He was satisfied with her progress, they could lighten her medication, let her start to wake up.

A little later, although that had felt like eternity for Jay, Hailey began to reach consciousness. She whimpered and tried to lift her other hand.

"Hailey, love… Everything is okay, I'm here. You are in the hospital", Jay told her softly, holding her hand and stroking it tenderly.

Hailey seemed to calm and the whimpering stopped, but she still tried to move her arms and blinked her eyes.

"Good, just like that. I need you to wake up, let me see those beautiful eyes of yours", Jay begged.

"Jay…", Hailey muttered.

Never before had his name sound so beautiful in his ears.

"I'm here, baby. I'm here. Everything is great now, you just need to wake up for a moment", Jay encouraged her.

Hailey opened her eyes. "Jay", she repeated, lifting her free hand and touching her nose, feeling the nasal oxygen cannula.

"Hey love", he greeted her fondly. "Let it be, you need it for a while. You have been in surgery."

"How bad?" Hayley's eyes dilated a little. Hazy memories of being shot came to her mind.

"It was quite bad but you are okay now, they have been able to fix it all. You will be as good as new", Jay reassured her.

Hailey nodded, still a little confused. Jay couldn't stop himself, he needed to kiss her. He bowed down and pressed soft kisses to her cheek. Hailey leaned her head instinctively closer, savouring the feeling of his lips on her skin.

Jay straightened out. There were tears in his eyes.

"God, you scared me, Hails. I am so incredibly relieved that you are okay", he confessed.

Hailey looked at him and a weak smile rose to her lips.

"Good. It was time for you to know how it feels", she said, her voice still hoarse.

"Ouch… But good to know you haven't lost you wit, seems you are really okay", Jay smiled happily.

"Yeah… payback is a bitch, isn't it", Hailey faintly giggled, but groaned when it made her side hurt.

"Are you in pain?" Jay immediately worried, already pressing the nurse call.

The nurse came in instantly, asking how she was and then giving her some iv. pain medication.

Jay had settled back in his chair and sent quick messages to the team group chat to tell Hailey was awake and was feeling well considering the situation.

Hailey relaxed against pillows and looked at Jay.

"Everybody else intact?", she asked. Her memories were already more organized, but she needed to be sure.

"Yeah. You were only one taking hits. We all have just been worried about you. The team will come and visit you tomorrow", answered Jay before continuing. "Hailey, I'm so sorry, I should have been there. I should have handled the arrest better."

Hailey sighed. She should have known Jay would blame himself.

"Jay. Stop right now. What happened, was nobody's fault. Not especially yours. It was a basic arrest, nothing indicated the other way. You even warned us to be careful. Don't beat yourself for nothing, please."

Jay looked at her. Hailey's eyes were sincere.

"Come on, come here", Hailey requested, signaling him to come even closer.

Jay leaned down and Hailey pulled him closer. She needed to kiss him.

Soft kisses eased everything bad to go away. The pain, the guilt.

Not wanting to overdo Hailey, Jay slowly withdrew. Hailey smiled at him, her eyes tired. Pain meds started to take a toll.

"Try to sleep a little, baby", Jay suggested.

Hailey yawned. "You are here when I wake up?" She asked almost shyly.

"Always. I am not going anywhere. You can trust, I won't ever leave you. Never", Jay promised, sitting down and taking her hand back to his.

Will entered Hailey's room next morning and stopped at the doorway. He smiled at the sight in front of him. Hailey was on her back, sleeping peacefully. Jay was asleep on the chair next to the bed, his upper body resting at Hailey's thighs, carefully avoiding her injured side.

"You know staring is rude?" Will could hear Hailey saying before she opened her eyes.

Will smiled at her and came closer, cup of coffee in his hand.

"Is that for me?" Hailey asked hopefully.

"Sorry, you are not allowed yet. This is for the sleepyhead next to you", Will regretted.

"How can anyone sleep when you are so loud?" Jay groaned and lifted his head.

"Good morning to you too", Will said, handing out the coffee.

"Thanks, I need this", Jay thanked.

"Hey, I'm one who is injured, and I get nothing?", Hailey pouted.

"You get this, babe", Jay comforted her and gave her a kiss.

"Awww… aren't you cute. My brother, the hopeless romantic", teased Will.

Jay kissed Hailey one more time and flashed the rude hand gesture to his brother.

Later, Hailey's surgeon had checked her in and approved the transfer to the surgical ward. She was making good progress. While Hailey was happy to hear that she would likely be cleared to desk duty in a few weeks and fully after about a month, she was not pleased to hear that she should stay in hospital at least a couple days of observation.

While she knew that Jay meant just good with his attempts to cheer her up, she needed to be alone a little. Like always, Jay seemed to sense it and didn't resist when Hailey told him to go home to take shower and eat.

"I'll be back soon, after freshening up I have to call Williams too to get an update. Vanessa texted me, Kevin and her are coming in an hour. Rest of the team is stuck with our case, but Kim said they will visit in the evening. She sends you hugs", Jay told Hailey before kissing her goodbye.

"I love you", he said even before moving to the door.

Hailey smiled at him and blew a kiss after him. "I love you too."

Hailey rested a little bit and cleared her thoughts. Jay had carefully suggested to her that she should meet Doctor Charles. Maybe he was right, she felt quite good, but it wouldn't hurt to talk with a counselor. Jay had said that he would book an appointment for himself with his own therapist. Hailey was extremely proud of him. After fighting against it for too many years, Jay had finally made peace with himself that he sometimes needed professional help. Hailey had been even more proud when Jay had told, that he would also recommend Vanessa to talk with a police psychologist.

Seeing Vanessa arrive at her room, Hailey knew Jay was right. Vanessa looked like a scared kid, like she had thought Hailey would be mad at her.

"Hey girl", Kevin greeted her and hugged her with care.

"Hey… Hailey, I am so sorry…", started Vanessa after hugging Hailey.

"Do not" Hailey stopped her right away. " Vanessa, I have already said this to Jay, this is nobody's fault. It was a basic arrest, things like this could happen."

"Just what I have been saying to both these idiots…", Kevin muttered.

Vanessa smiled at Hailey, looking still a little unsure. Hailey made an inner note to herself to talk about Vanessa with Jay.

"Is that for me?" Hailey decided to change a subject for now and nodded towards a paper bag Vanessa was holding.

"Oh, yeah. Jay messaged that you are allowed to take some fluid food, so we brought you smoothies", Vanessa offered the paper bag to Hailey.

"Awesome, thanks a lot", Hailey accepted treats with satisfaction.

While Hailey drank her smoothie, she asked them to update her about the case. They hesitated a little but after she scolded them, they gave up and updated the situation to her.

"Jay is gonna kill us for burdening you with this shit", Kevin said after the update. "You really scared the shit out from all of us, but you almost caused him a heart attack."

"Yeah Hailey, you had to stop doing things like that, Sarge is an old man, he can't take it anymore", Vanessa laughed.

"Oh god, I am so gonna tell him you called him old", Hailey giggled and held her injured side.

"Nah. You wouldn't, you don't want to make him feel bad", Vanessa grinned. "He is your fiance and future baby daddy after all."

"Excuse me, what?" Hailey tried to look upset. After the engagement, she had found herself sometimes thinking of little freckled babies, but Vanessa and Kevin didn't need to know that.

"You can not fool us Hailey Upton. We saw you looking at Jay holding the baby when Dave's wife and kids visited the precinct", Kevin joined the discussion.

"Your ovarios screamed so loud that Kim and I almost had to hold our ears", Vanessa backed up Kevin.

"Do you talk about my ovarios with Kim?" Now Hailey was genuinely stunned.

"Well just once, so not usually and for our defence, also Platt had noticed it" Vanessa defended.

"Oh my god, you talk about my ovarios with Platt too", Hailey sighed.

"What can I say, you were so obvious when you looked at Jay holding the baby with your heart eyes", Vanessa answered grinning.

"I really don't talk about your feminine organs, like ever, but what she said about heart eyes, totally true", Kevin said, with a forceful nod.

"I am not sure I like you anymore", Hailey pouted in jest. "You are not fun."

Just then Jay came in. "Hey you two, are you harassing my girl?", he interrupted.

"Don't forget I can make you work overtime", he continued pointing at them with his finger.

"We were just talking about how Hailey still has to marry you", Vanessa made a smooth dodge.

"Hell yes she has to", Jay confirmed.

"You can not get rid of marrying me just by getting shot", he looked at Hailey with his trademark grinn.

"Wouldn't even dream about it", Hailey answered smiling fondly.

"Oh, you are so going to get married. I have already done an awesome Upstead playlist for your wedding party", Vanessa chimed in.

"Oh god, has someone nominated you for DJ to our wedding? And what a heck is Upstead?" Jay looked horrified.

"Well, I am a maid of honor… Speaking of that playlist, how do you feel about Justin Bieber?", Vanessa asked.

"Okay. I am done. You two, I order you to go to the work and leave me with my fiancee. We need to make a plan how we elope, we can't have a wedding with you in charge", Jay laughed.

Kevin patted Jay to the back before beginning to push Vanessa out of the room.

"Let's go before you get yourself fired", he laughed.

Vanessa waved to Hailey and made a gesture to let her know she was going to call her later. Hailey smiled at her friends and waved to them.

"So, you want to elope?", Hailey winked.

"I want whatever you want. I don't care if there's pink flying elephants in the wedding, as long as you marry me", Jay answered truthfully.

"Yeah. I don't think we need elephants of any colour. I think we stick in the earlier plans. I am so glad this little incident didn't ruin those plans", Hailey smiled happily.

"I think it's a little too early for me to call this a little incident", Jay winced. "Probably the worst moments of my life and yet I have been at war…."

Hailey looked at him and reached to take his hand to hers, lifting it to her cheek.

"I'm here and I'm good. We are good", she reassured.

"We are", Jay smiled at her and leaned to kiss her. "We are gonna always be good, and we are gonna get married."

"I can't wait to marry you", Hailey beamed. "Only a little over a month before the wedding. Maybe I should use the sick leave as an advantage and make all the last preparations. Just don't tell my boss I am planning this."

"Oh, you have such a generous boss, that I believe he wouldn't care", Jay grinned.

"Yeah, he really is awesome", Hailey said and pulled Jay closer. "Come on, I want to take a nap, but I want you to hold me."

"Are you sure, I don't want to hurt you?"

"I'm sure, just lay on my good side", Haile sifted to make space for him.

Lying there, Hailey in his arms, Jay felt that everything really would be fine again.

"Do you have to go to work later?" Hailey whispered against his chest.

"No. I called Williams, he has everything in control. I'll go tomorrow, if you are still feeling fine enough. Now I'm all yours.", Jay answered and kissed the top of her head.

"Good. Tomorrow I have a meeting with Dr. Charles and also with the physiotherapist", Hailey answered and nuzzled even closer to Jay.

Jay stroked her hair slowly.

"Take your nap, love. I'll be here, I am not going anywhere."

Cherishing that promise in her mind, Hailey drifted to sleep. She was safe.