Yurts n' Coops
Chapter Summary
At last, the building begins!
Chapter Notes
A special thank you to theillogicalthinker for the old joke of 'Short people are mean
because they're closer to hell.'
Folder: Never To Be Shown In Public
Created: February 12
"I shall now raise the Beast Who Hates Mornings!" Lucy announced dramatically and
swept back one of the bed area curtains. Sprawled with catlike abandon as though
dropped from a great height, Kara was oblivious to the noise. Gesticulating like a
cheesy cartoon villain, Lucy made hocus pocus chanting sounds before pausing to lean
over and delicately drop a handful of snow between Kara's clavicles.
Kara shrieked like a banshee and the camera wobbled dramatically in time to Brainy's
grunt as a cackling Lucy nearly mowed him down, Kara flailing after her. With only
inches to spare, Lucy made it out the door while Kara pulled up and grumbled at the
cold wet streaks on her skin and henley top.
"As if one big sister weren't bad enough…"
With everyone awake, breakfast and coffee were distributed and they layered up to
brave the winter outside.
The whole day was going to be hard work in icy conditions, interspersed with a
constant stream of sass and friendly insults. Kara knew she was doomed to sigh at the
vulgar one-upmanship, while Brainy and Nia, new to the wild pack of mongrels,
would be doubtlessly torn between amusement and being scandalized.
The core of the chaos was always Alex, Sara and Lucy, but Ava was determined to
hold her own. She was a lawyer, dammit, and had a reputation to uphold!
Collecting tools, including some new supplies brought in on the truck Alex ran a
loving hand over, the gang carried and stacked what seemed like miles of lightweight
steel conduit.
"Do we really have to fish all the barn's wire through this?" Lucy complained as they
started laying out and cutting the conduit. Ava just poked her in the shoulder with her
hammer.
"This makes your electrical waterproof and is a near-guarantee that no inspector will
hassle you. As a bonus, rodents will be less likely to get into your wiring as well."
That was enough to silence any other objections.
The gang of them behaved themselves as they were taught tasks by Ava and then left
to their own devices. Then it was game on.
"It sure is a shame none of the Seattle ladies are going to be able to get a piece of that
again," was Sara's opening salvo as she gestured expansively at Alex. The familiar
smirk quirked over Alex's face and her voice was pure suggestiveness.
"This is possibly the gayest town on the west coast, WeHo and Frisco
notwithstanding. I'm quite sure I can get myself laid, Lance."
Kara made a face that screamed, 'overshare' that set Nia to giggling, which in turn set
the others off to gales of laughter.
As they wound down, Ava said conversationally, "you just wait. If you think there is
some admiring going on so far? Pfft. And there are already some impressively thirsty
comments popping up on your few videos. Give your channel time to grow and Alex
can have her pick."
Sara gasped dramatically and fake ranted, "Aves! Don't encourage her! Just look at
that smug little face!"
"They barely look at the face," Lucy scoffed. "It's the abs and arms."
"Lucky them. The little shit didn't look like that when I was with her," Sara snarked
and Alex finally jumped in.
"Duh. I was a scrawny teenager, all sinew and attitude."
"And that's changed?"
Alex just stuck her tongue out at her oldest friend and struck a bodybuilder pose. It
looked absurd in their heavy winter layers, but it got her the round of laughs she was
after.
For a bit, the gang of them worked in relative peace, until Alex casually dropped, "you
should join us."
Sara didn't even look away from her intent work at a junction box, but she didn't need
to. The sarcasm came across quite clearly. "Uh no. In fact, hell no."
"Awwww, why?"
Still without turning, Sara snarked, "it's the middle of nowhere, it's full of snow that
will soon turn to mud, and how the fuck do you really think you're going to get laid
here? Gayest town on the west coast, my ass."
"Oh, cowgirl up, you wuss!" Lucy chimed in acerbically. "This is Oregon, not the deep
south. Don't you know that this fair land is notorious for being seriously wlw?"
Sara scoffed, but still kept to her work. Alex turned away from her own project to plant
hands on hips and stare incredulously. "Sara, are you serious? Have you really never
heard of National City? What sort of pussy monster are you anyway?"
"The kind that lives in a proper city, you freak!"
"And is whipped."
"Fuck off, Danvers. You're just jealous."
Alex shrugged, but didn't contradict the statement.
"You're just chafing because you got collared, Lance. What the hell that nice lawyer
sees in you is totally beyond me."
Sara grinned dopily and finally left off her work to distract her lady with kisses for a
moment before getting back to what she'd been doing.
There was a surprisingly long and quiet pause then while the team fished multiple
strands of colored wires through the steel conduit and put it in place with brackets and
screws. Seams were sealed and then it was off to the next bit.
"Hey, it's snowing again," Nia suddenly announced and the rest of them immediately
set aside what they were doing to cluster to the main door of the barn. Wryly grinning
at their 'oooh'ing and 'aahh'ing, she teased, "you really aren't used to this climate, are
you? What I meant by that statement was that we should get everything undercover
that needs to be."
Spurred on by the local who knew this area better than they ever would, the gang
finished emptying the truck and stashed all of the supplies in barn or tent. That was as
good an excuse for lunch as any and they stripped off their heavy layers and took a
long break.
That meant more banter, of course. Alex launched the opening salvo, her grin wicked.
"More snow, huh? That stupid all wheel drive of yours will actually get in some hard
work instead of just compensating for your insane driving."
Lucy was instantly in harangue mode, waving her sandwich in her best friend's face.
"Fuck you, Danvers, my gay as fuck Subaru has gotten me laid more times than I can
count!"
"Oh, is that what the dents are?"
Abruptly and completely out of left field, Kara broke in with a perfect deadpan. "Naw,
those are just her keeping score."
"Ahahahaha!" Alex cackled in delight. "Kara got you, Lucifer!"
"Asshole!"
Brainy just sighed and finally put the camera away. With the pack of them so wound
up and raunchy, he would never be able to use any of the footage anyway.
It's a busy few days in Los Angeles and I don't get much downtime between Lex's dramas and
keeping in touch with my girls. Still, I find quiet corners of my day to squeeze in a few videos here
and there. The team helps their friends from Seattle get much of the rewiring done in the barn, their
constant sass and banter making me chuckle frequently. Even the beeping out of the cussing
becomes part of the act.
The local electrician seems bemused by them, but gets done what they can't and checks over their
work. A second, smaller fuse box installed in the shop side of the barn is confusing until Alex
gestures at it and simply says, "for the yurt when we can get to it. Later, we'll modify it if we need
a smaller barn or shop or something like that."
That makes sense. Brainy is excited to have his trailer back, which makes more sense when he
steps inside to reveal, not the bland interior of a late-model travel trailer, but a nerd boy haven of
electronics and an elaborate workspace. He gives a quick tour of the gutted and rebuilt space,
including the back half that is still mostly bed and bathroom.
Though he's still twitchy with internet withdrawals and it makes me laugh.
The videos are labeled with dates earlier then the days they are released, sometimes by more than a
week, discrepancies between the dates as proof of the early days of no internet. By their subscriber
count, they've since solved that problem.
Not knowing what to expect from 'Valentines Plan a Task Massacre', I leave it until Jess and I are
packed and waiting at the airport. It's a long one, nearly forty minutes, and opens on the gang in
their enormous tent. The space looks like a well-supplied outdoor camp incongruously mixed with
household furnishings, set out on a plywood floor and surrounded by the white canvas interior of
the Army tent.
I wonder if, months ago when this took place, they found the odd surroundings as disconcerting as
we viewers do.
There's even a 'fire pit' in the middle of their ratty old couch and lawn chairs, which I know is a
radiant heater, and a ramshackle tabletop is on top of it. Nia is with them, which is always nice, and
with a tripod recording the action, Brainy is perched on the couch. Watching he and Nia make shy
flirty eyes at each other is as heartwarming as a Disney-Pixar movie.
Valentines Plan a Task Massacre. February 13
12840 views
Rainbow Haven Acres
Published on February 20, 2017
Toweling off damp hair, Lucy joined the gang in winding down from their day. In
defiance of the icy winter on the other side of thick canvas, she was barely covered in
scanty shorts, a tanktop that left little to the imagination and a pair of comically ugly
shearling boots. Nimble as a cat, she vaulted over the back of the couch and Brainy
looked utterly scandalized by her.
"The porta-potty shower isn't bad. This is the warmest I've been since we walked out
of the Avalancecondo."
Alex threw a ball of wadded paper at her and teased, "not for long dressed like that,
you hussy."
"Uuuugh, I'm so sick of being trussed up like a damn Alaskan wilderness explorer!
This fine skin needs to breathe!"
A melodramatic gesture up and down her admittedly fine physique earned stifled
snickering.
Grinning, Alex tried to paste on a sympathetic expression. "Sorry, Brainy. We should
have warned you that Lucy is a champion of the camp, 'I'm home and you're lucky I'm
wearing clothes at all'."
"Captain Overshare," Kara agreed and Lucy spluttered.
"That's major to you, soldier!"
That was too much for Alex to resist, snarking, "Major Pain-In-the-Ass, maybe."
Alex and Lucy glared affectionately for a moment before Lucy became animated
again. "Okay, my ragged crew of pirates, what's next on the agenda?"
"You can't be Army and have a pirate ship," Kara sassed and Lucy pointed at her as
though she held an invisible sword.
"Shut it, or walk the plank! I am tiny and mean and will hack you down, blonde tree!
To business!"
When Kara looked almost offended, Alex just chuckled and patted her leg. "See, I told
you. Short people are mean because they're closer to hell."
With the opening act complete, the scene dissolves from dim tent to true black and then slowly
fades to the bright white of a drone shot of their wintry wonderland. From the tent, small figures
spill out into the snow and scatter to tasks. Alex's voice says over the scene, "well, right out of the
gate, we have got to get that damn yurt up. We'll kill each other packed in too close. No matter the
size of this ridiculous Army surplus circus tent, it's gonna get too small and fast."
"It's not exactly glamping," Lucy said wryly and Alex sounds amused when she replies.
"Better than freezing our -beep- off though."
I actually like these segments of the team's disembodied voices interspersed over and around bits of
video. It's interesting to see the thoughts and action taking place in the same space. Though,
unsurprisingly, they wander off subject fairly quickly.
The action is kicked off with the tractor moving at comically high speeds to shove a large circle
clear of snow behind the barn. Thankfully the camera drone is clearly in hover mode as there's very
little wobble in the recording. At the speed the video is at, it could make a viewer seasick!
Fast as an artist with toothpicks and superglue, concrete footings are set out and the support
structure appears. Thick panels that look like boards with styrofoam sandwiched between them are
laid out and cut into a perfect circle smaller than the underlying superstructure. With a blink of
night, the hyper-fast team is scuttling about once more, the bundle of sticks they picked up from
the yurt manufacturer unfolding into long sections like a portable fence that ring the platform.
Doorways are set, the fences attached to them to make an open wall that anchor rafters that radiate
up to a central ring some three feet across. Soon, there is the bones of a yurt standing, heavy cloth
then a skin of shimmering silver girdles the bones, then a layer of heavy material in a terracotta red,
complimented by a pale gray roof that reflects just enough light to indicate that it is some sort of
rubbery material. Someone pops up in the open hole at the peak of the roof with a rope and hauls
the transparent dome into place while others of the team set to work on a deck around the base of
the yurt to complete the circle.
Even this high-speed chase of a video leaves me impressed. Who knew a yurt could be so
interesting?
All the while, the team has been chatting back in their makeshift living room, behind the scenes.
"Y'know, Kara, you haven't really said what sort of living area appeals to you."
She sounds a little startled at Lucy's calm question. "Well… I… Yes, I should do that. Something
small and cozy would be nice. Like those tiny houses that are so popular."
"Oh that sounds lovely," Nia adds in dreamily.
"We can do that. Maybe a couple shed kits we can finish out to be lived in?"
Voice clearly startled at being included in Alex's statement, Nia says, "a couple of them?"
"Well sure, Nia. You're family now and we'd love for you to stay if you like."
I really wish I could see the look on Nia's face as she half-sobs a 'thank you'. Then again, I also
appreciate that the gang left her some privacy in a vulnerable moment.
Leave it to kind-hearted Kara to cover for her, piping up in a little sister wheedling tone. "Could I
finally have some birds, Alex? Like special birds, in an aviary?"
Alex's voice is pure fondness and I'll bet the shuffling noises are a big hug. "You've been talking
about that since you were about three years old. This is home now and we can do whatever we
want! Including building you a dream aviary. Or maybe a chicken coop to start with."
Kara's sound of glee becomes a whine of protest. "Aww! Everyone has chickens!"
"Exactly! So there's tons of caretaker info out there and later we can build up to something just for
fun like, I dunno, finches and stuff?"
"Keeping the coyotes off 'em will be a nightmare," Lucy mused.
"And the hawks," Brainy adds helpfully and I can clearly visualize the sister's glares.
"Fresh food would be good for them. And they'd get our scraps."
"And they provide fertilizer!"
While Kara and Lucy laugh, Alex turns thoughtful. "What if we combined a greenhouse and
chicken coop? I guess we'd have to do something stronger than those plastic tunnel thingies we see
all over. I'm pretty sure the wire crosshatch stuff like in rabbit hutches would work."
"Hardware cloth," Kara supplies helpfully. "I've been reading. What about those polycarbonate
panels for roofing? They come in clear and even smoky ones like sunglasses."
Lucy is clearly getting sucked in whether she likes it or not. "Yeah, that should work. A wooden
frame tall enough to work in, an enclosed coop at one end. Poly panels for the roof and hardware
cloth walls. It'll need some sort of ventilation at the ridgeline for hot days."
"If we build two greenhouses, on either side, we can rotate food and chickens. Add the second one
on later when we have the money."
"Done! If the chickens live there year round, we'll need to enclose them in winter. Something that
can be reused but tucked away."
"Storm windows?" Brainy suggests questioningly and Lucy crows in delight.
"Storm windows! Perfect! Just some wooden frames and heavy plastic like the tunnel greenhouses,
with some way to lock them in place and that will be fine. We're in the mountains, sure, but we're
not like, I dunno, Minnesota."
"And I want bees," Kara tacks on in a mulish voice.
"Say what?" it might be the most baffled that I've heard Alex yet, and I've watched quite a few of
these videos now. It's adorable.
"Beehives. With bees. Who will pollinate our food and make us honey."
"Uh… well I can't argue with that. Are you sure?"
"Very."
"Okay, that's good enough for me. I'll help. After all, if we get honey out of it."
"You're my favorite sister, Alex!"
The hyper-accelerated speed of the video action slows suddenly, the drone dropping out of a
sunset-saturated sky to where the team are high-fiving one another and tromping off to the tent.
The drone makes a slow, careful pan around the yurt with its pleasant conical shape and sturdy
deck.
It looks impossibly inviting.
These moments of overpowering empathy are so… strange. I have no desire to do something so
insane as what they're doing! Yet… I cannot resist eyeing the suggested link as the video winds
down to the sound of Alex's smooth voice.
"I have to say that I'm excited to have my own space again, even as it's going to need weeks of
work. That said, we're taking a couple of days off to recoup, finally get into town and meet the
locals, find a little wood-burning stove, get the sheds and some baby chickens ordered, that sort of
thing. Thanks for watching and have a good one. We're out."
The next suggested video is a break from their winter adventures, a green patch of thumbnail
entitled ''The Coop de Grace. April 25 through 27.' Cute.
We open to a gloriously bright sunny day, even as snow still lurks in icy piles and in the shadows
of the trees. I avidly drink in the scene of erupting spring, the red barn and sandy-tan tent off in the
near distance. The camera does a slow pan, intriguing me with a glimpse of a cluster of smaller
buildings and what looks like hundreds of square feet of deck that my chronological jump has
skipped over.
There's a split in the gravel road, one leg sweeping out to camera right where the team is busy as an
anthill around a pile of wood and wire and roof panels. If I'm lucky…
The deities that watch over those that love women have smiled upon me, because Alex -and Lucy
too- are dressed like it's summer.
Oh yummy!
Just like the first time I laid eyes on this hottie, I'm fascinated with Alex. This is a reminder of that
sexy tableau in the barn from that first video I watched. There has been a lot of videos since then
and, having gotten used to the heavy winter gear, watching those broad shoulders and strong arms
flex as she helps unload the pickup is delicious. The white ribbed tank top is nearly transparent
with sweat and there are beads of it along her strong neck.
I fully own that I love to admire a well-built woman, particularly if she's got a solid dose of butch
energy. My little femme heart is all a-flutter in girlish delight at those muscled shoulders tapering
to a trim waist and the sinful things the right pair of cargo jeans can do for a nice ass.
To my relief and disappointment, the camera shifts.
"Stuff," Lucy says gruffly and gestures broadly to the piles before ignoring the camera. That leaves
Alex at the edge of the frame to half-turn and smirk. In delicious, feminine contrast to those
shoulders -and really, I'm about to squeal and annoy Jess- are perky tits beneath stretchy cotton
and a belly so flat I can't stop myself from pausing to see if I can catch a glimpse of the sculpted
abs I just know are beneath that tight shirt. Really, this crush is getting out of hand…
Still, I don't hesitate to hit play again.
"So, back on V-Day, me and the gang talked about chickens. Well, we've settled on a plan, gotten
the supplies we need and this unseasonably gorgeous weather is supposed to hold for a couple of
days. So let's get started!"
Mostly in voiceovers -and, god, it's so delightfully unfair that she has a sexy voice too- Alex
explains what's going on as the playback speed goes from real-world to NASCAR and back and
forth. The others interject here and there, but it's mostly Alex talking.
Holes are dug and posts set in dry concrete, water following it down, until four of them make a
square some ten feet in diameter. Then they shift gears while that sets. Steel poles are pounded into
the ground and a jumble of curved poles becomes sweeping arches standing on stumpy legs. By the
third arch, I think I know what they're doing, but I keep getting distracted by the attractive narrator!
Sure enough, with ten arches up, the gang pulls a comically huge sheet of semi-translucent plastic
over them and lashes it down between board battens atop the stumpy legs. The trailing ends are
wrapped around more poles so the weight holds them to the ground.
A blink and there are two of them in a long tunnel with the posts between. For the now-hard
concrete, Alex, Lucy and Nia cut wood and hammer nails and set screws. In short order, there is a
shed-like building with nesting boxes and poles to perch on and sturdy doors that close snugly
against hungry predators. As with everything I've watched on this addictive channel, the whole
thing is strangely fascinating on a visceral level, mixed in with the humor and raw attractiveness of
this group of friends.
LL Not-Your-Neck-Of-The-Woods 1 minute ago
I was always curious what those plastic tunnels were. Thank you for showing us! And
thank you for the voiceover work, Alex. Your voice is very easy on the ears!
Committed now to the seven videos in the 'Playing Chicken' playlist -none of them shorter than
eighteen minutes- I settle in to stay up later than I should… and can't find an ounce of regret for it.