A/N: Here's the next chapter of Nights at Honey's. Thanks for all your comments and support. As always, I appreciate your interest in this ridiculous story.
Kensi slipped in her comm before she headed out to start her shift. It wasn't the first time she'd had to pose as a waitress, but she wasn't looking forward to dealing with drunken, horny people.
"You good, Kens?" Nell checked as she weaved in between the patrons. They were pretty evenly mixed between men and women, with what appeared to be several bachelorette and bachelor parties making up a significant part of the crowd. There were also several groups of college-aged girls who were obviously enjoying being of legal age.
"Yup." So far no one had paid her much attention, aside from placing their orders. Which made sense; they were surrounded by dancers in varying stages of nudity.
"Did Deeks come on yet?" Callen asked, likely worried about him being left unattended for any length of time.
"He's up next," Kensi murmured as she smiled at a tipsy couple and removed their empty glasses from the table. She glanced at the stage where a woman was gyrating on the floor in the tiniest bikini top possible and a thong.
When she'd been a senior in college, some of Kensi's friends had convinced her to come to a strip club in an attempt to help her through a bad break up. She'd regretted almost every moment. It wasn't that she minded the plethora of half-naked men, but she felt slightly dirty and embarrassed on their behalf.
The woman on stage, who could have been anywhere from 18 to early 30's-her thick makeup made it difficult to tell-finally ended to exuberant applause, cheers, and dollar bills.
During the time it took to clear the stage, Kensi delivered several orders from the bar, keeping one eye out for Deeks. Making sure he was safe was her first priority, but she also had to keep up appearances as a server. If she messed up to much or seemed to obvious-even with the cover Deeks had fabricated-their suspect might get suspicious and leave.
She turned around from the bar with a fresh tray of drinks in time to see a group of five male dancers file out onto the stage in, forming a V shape. Instantly she sought out Deeks and spotted him on the far left, blonde hair impossible to miss. Somehow, under the glow of the artificial lighting, his relatively modest clothes seemed almost indecent.
She felt her neck flush, heat sweeping through her body as a song with a heavy beat started and they swiveled their hips in unison. Kensi wasn't sure what the theme of the routine was supposed to be, but she doubted anyone cared. They seemed thoroughly entertained by the thrusting and gyrating.
One by one, each dancer stripped off his shirt, flinging it to a different woman in the audience before returning to their spot in the formation. Deeks was the last to go and Kensi realized she was holding her breath, her body tensed as he slowly ran a hand down his clothed chest, making eye contact with a woman in the front row.
He gave a slow, indecent roll of his hips and slipped his shirt off in one fluid move, throwing his arms wide and head back. Unlike some of the men, his skin didn't glisten unnaturally from some kind of oil. He didn't need it. He hooked a finger in the top of his pants, easing the material down an inch, and gave a full body roll that earned him a few shouts.
"Oh my god!" Nell drawled in Kensi's ear, reminding her that she was wearing a camera. And in the middle of a case. "My imagination did not do his body justice."
"Nell, we are on a case," Sam reminded her, sounding vaguely annoyed, but maybe just a little amused too.
"That doesn't mean I can't enjoy the attractions. The very, very muscular attractions."
Ducking her head, Kensi hurried over to deliver her drinks, reminding herself to focus. She was a federal agent and a couple of guys without their shirts on was not a big deal.
Kensi kept an eye on the crowd as the routine finished, but aside from an overly excited girl in a tiara who made a grab for the lead dancer, no one seemed particularly interested in Deeks. Or at least more so than the other men.
Still, it bothered her more than she would like to admit to see people pawing at Deeks. To see a woman bridge the space between audience and stage so she could slip money into the waistband of his pants. If he was embarrassed by the attention, the objectification, he hid it well.
"You see anybody suspicious?" Sam asked.
"Other than the two hundred people wishing they could tear his clothes off? Nope" With all the flashing lights, music, and people, it was difficult to tell just what was happening at times.
"Does that include you?" Callen joked.
"Well, I bet he looks 10 times better in a thong than you would," Kensi said pleasantly, surprised when she heard Sam laugh.
"She's got you there, G. Nobody wants to see you strip," he said and she could picture his smirk.
"Hey, I may not be muscle bound, unlike some people I know, but I'm sure I could hold my own. If I felt like it."
"Oh, sure you could. You know these guys would murder you."
Rolling her eyes, Kensi let them bicker for a couple minutes without interruption. Deeks had left the stage, throwing a wink her way before he sauntered off. God, she was going to kill him when
she had the chance.
The next hour was a non-stop flurry of activity. Kensi ran drinks to several tables, including one with a middle-aged man who smacked her butt while he handed her a $20 tip. She pocketed the money, smiled pleasantly, and then calmed herself with thoughts of using him for target practice.
Deeks had been on stage one more time for a firefighter routine. It was less sexual and more on the ridiculous side, giving the dancers a chance to show off their physical prowess. In between, there'd been a series of solo dances which Kensi had mostly ignored.
As she was returning from delivering a bottle of champagne to a private party, the lights
suddenly dimmed. Kensi spun around, squinting at the darkened stage.
"And now, I'd like to introduce one of our most popular entertainers, Jack," the DJ announced. A spotlight appeared in the middle of the stage, hovering over a crouched figure. There was a hushed silence, the first few notes of a song played, and the man's head shot up.
Kensi's mouth dropped open. It was Deeks. He wore brown trousers with suspenders, drawn up over a long sleeve shirt with his hair slicked back and parted.
It suddenly occurred to her that the song playing was a more rhythmic version of "My Heart Will Go On", but clearly still the theme from Titanic. Which meant he was supposed to be Jack Dawson.
"Oh, you have got to be kidding me," Kensi muttered, shaking her head in disbelief, even as she stared at him.
He stood slowly, drawing out the moment, playing up on the innocent factor as he kept his face turned away from the audience. Taking a step forward, he reached out, grasping at the air, pulled his hand back and then grasped his head with both hands. He let one trail through his hair and down his chest. Beginning a slow rolling movement, he slipped a suspender over his shoulder, toying with it for a moment, as he finally made eye contact again.
Someone in the audience gasped, but Deeks didn't react other than to throw an extra swivel into his hips. The other suspender fell and he slowly unbuttoned his shirt, fiddling each one, taking time to run his hands over his torso and thighs. By the time it was open, Kensi was slightly sweaty.
He slid it off, letting it drop to the floor, his muscles glistening in the spotlight, lean, firm. Deeks moved across the stage, pausing in front of a chair Kensi hadn't noticed until that moment, and sat on it backwards, thrusting against with his hands braced on the back.
Jack Dawson had certainly never done that. As he danced over the chair, he searched the crowd until he found Kensi's eyes, gliding his hand down his chest against, straight down to the top of his pants, he paused.
She held her breath, unable to look away. He flicked the button open, the hint of a smirk twitching at his lips before he recovered his persona and grasped either side of the fabric. She saw the lean V of his pelvis, her entire body flushing as he lifted his chin and she knew what he was about to do.
Before he could, someone ran from the crowd, leaped onto the stage and tackled Deeks to the ground. As the crowd screamed, both cheers and protests, Kensi dropped her tray and raced toward the stage.
A/N: Obviously I have no idea what a strip club–excuse me, exotic dance establishment–is really like, let alone a co-ed one. Apparently most have separate areas for male and female dancers. But I didn't plan for that. Hopefully you don't mind the lack of accuracy in this highly serious fic.