Chapter 5 – The Comeback of Sundance Kid

John Ambrose McClaren had spent the week in pure bliss. The more he got to know Lara Jean, the more he liked her – he did not want to venture yet to the other "L" word, but he was getting there. She was considerate, bubbly, quirky and fun to be around, not to mention she was absolutely gorgeous, beautiful and she had a sense of style that was off-charts. Plus, she enjoyed taking things slow, which sort of was a good balance as it grounded him down to earth, him who tended to be a dreamer and get carried away too fast. He did not even take it bad when he offered for her to meet his parents and said that it was too soon and she'd like for them to know each other better and spend more time with each other before taking the big leap. He had rolled his eyes, though. "They know you, Lara Jean. You used to come over quite often when we were kids." She had giggled – adorably, what it was true, it has nothing to do with him being utterly whipped – and said. "It is not the same though. It was five years ago, and I am your girlfriend now." Girlfriend. They did not have the conversation, not really. They just went with it, very naturally. He saw the fear creep onto her face. "I mean, well, I didn't…" He wished he would let her stammer a bit more, he wished his heart would let him because she was quite fun to watch – and adorable, again.

"Lara Jean, calm down. Of course you are my girlfriend. It just did not occur to me to have the conversation because our bond seems pretty natural. But you are right and I am sorry. Would you be my girlfriend, officially, Lara Jean Song-Covey." She had beamed at him and his heart swelled. He wondered whether one day he would stop having all these reactions and all these feelings when it came to her. "Well, that if you'll have me, Lara Jean?" He asked for good measure, because that is what a gentleman does, he does not impose himself on a lady. She answered softly. "Naturally. Who am I to fight fate, John Ambrose?" There was the reference to the last letter she wrote to him. He hadn't answered, they had hashed that out afterwards. But he figured he could still write to her every once in a while, because that is just what they did. Then, what she said next got him out of his thoughts.

"So, what would you say if we did our first public appearance as boyfriend and girlfriend later this week. Trevor is throwing a party this Friday and I said I would bring a date. I was referring to you. It'll be nice, you'll get to see everyone after such a long time. Please, say yes?" She pouted, her lower lip trembling slightly and how could he say no to that? True, he was not the biggest on parties but it would be indeed nice to figure how everyone else was doing, what they have become, they were all friends once upon a time, after all. "It'll be my pleasure Lara Jean; shall I pick you up at 7? I have debate club before that" She nodded, took her hand and planted a light kiss on it. He thought his heart was about to burst out of his chest by this simple gesture of sweetness.

Ever since, he was looking forward to that party. For starters, he missed her. They were not able to see each that much this week, apart from Belleview work. Sure, they texted all day long, but it was not the same as holding her although some of those texts were worth framing. He smiled while reading one she had sent him a couple of days ago.

From: Lara-Jean Song Covey

[6.53 PM]

John Ambrose, McClaren. I could tell you I miss you. It would be the easy way to express my feelings. But, you know me. I don't do easy. I do cheesy. So instead, I'll tell you that my days are dull without, that I long for your smile, your laugh, your touch and I am restless. That will remain unchanged until I get to hold your hand.

Love,
Lara Jean

Boy, was she gifted with words. She had to write something at some point in her life, she'd be terrific. It felt like she went to quite some lengths to select the right word and right rhythm for a sentence. Of course, there is the content of the message as well which made his heart skip a beat. He got used to the sensation ever since fate had led him back to Lara Jean. It is with a smile on his face that he knew the party would be great.

Peter Kavinsky's week was less of a cruise. Ever since he heard that Lara Jean went on a date with a guy – a guy who was not him – he was on edge. His stomach churned every time he got a glimpse of her in the hallways or in class. She dodged very tactfully every attempt he made to speak to her. But what made him enraged was that day in Chemistry when she switched lab partners so that she would work with Lucas and leave him with Christine. Chemistry was their thing – both the subject at school and what we used to have. Christine had been utterly helpless and refused to answer any of his questions with respect to Lara Jean. Sister's code or whatever. "Plus, I don't particularly like you Kavinsky. Why would I help you with LJ? Also, aren't you supposed to have a girlfriend, my cousin?" He remained silent at Christine's shots at him. Probably because she was right.

If he was honest, ever since he got back together with Gen, all he could think about were the reasons why it did not work between them. He did not use to see those when they were first together, it seemed all perfect and fluffy. But after Lara Jean had come into his life, nothing was the same. Gen seemed dull, conceited and a bit annoying if he was being completely honest. Sure, she was still hot and they were hot together, and she was super popular which made it so much easier to blend in. But at the end, that really didn't matter. He realized it now. Gen was safe because he knew her. But he was in love with the idea of her, the picture he had painted in his head over the years. But his Lara Jean stunt snapped him back to reality about Gen. The thing is, he could not leave her. Not now. Her parents were getting a divorce and he needed to be by her side. He did not want to bail on her, he was better than that. And Lara Jean had a boyfriend for all I know. He hoped she did not.

A couple of days later though, his fears were confirmed. Lara Jean made her relationship official and exclusive. She did not go public on Instagram, he knew all too well that it was not her type. No, he had casually followed Lucas and Christine when they were walking around school and heard Lucas gushing literally about the fact that "LJ got together with him. I am sure they are the cutest together" and something about fate. He wondered whether the fact that Lucas was so sure that "they are the cutest together" – that sentence alone playing in his mind made him want to throw up – meant that it is someone they knew. Maybe Carlos Myers? Trevor told him the other day that he heard Carlos would give Lara Jean another try after he heard that she had broken up with Peter. Peter snorted. If it was Carlos Myers, then no way in hell would he look "cute" with Lara Jean. I am the only one who can look cute with her. At that very moment, Genevieve did barely exist, all Peter could think about was Lara Jean.

And the week went on that way, him wondering who Lara Jean was with and trying to get eyes on her every once in a while. The odd thing is that she was always with Lucas and Chris, no one else around and as she was supposed to have a new boyfriend, he ought to be around. That confused Peter who was walking in the cafeteria until he heard Trevor's voice next to him. "It's Lara Jean, right?" Peter looked at him in bewilderment, was he that obvious? He sighed. Trevor was his best friend since forever, and could see right through him. There was no lying to him. He nodded lightly as Trevor motioned for him to go eat outside, somewhere quiet where they could talk. "Spill, Kavinsky."

Here goes nothing, he thought. "I don't know, Pike. It's just like I am not over her, not totally. Sure, Gen and I are hot together, we're both so popular and we fit on paper. But ever since LJ came into my life…The ironic thing is that I sort of forced her into that, then fake turned into real and now…" Trevor shot him a quizzical look. "What do you mean fake into real, Peter?" Trevor asked. Peter went on to tell him everything about their plan to make Gen and Sanderson jealous, how it backfired to them having actual feelings for each other after getting to know each other, he even recounted that fateful night when he ran to Lara Jean's for her to break up with him, and how that led him back to Gen's arms out of vulnerability. Trevor remained silent a moment, processing all this.

"All I can say is that LJ was good for you man. You were more relaxed around her, more carefree. And for once, me and the guys actually liked your girlfriend. She makes mean cookies." They both laughed. "No, but more seriously. I think you did not do right by Lara Jean, Peter. Can you imagine how she felt when she realized that in a span of what, 12 hours, you went from begging her to give you a chance to getting back with Genevieve? Worthless, that's how she felt; that you'd end up going back to her anyways and that she should've known better." Peter was taken aback. He always knew Trevor was insightful and read people well, and the way he just so easily put himself in Lara Jean's shoes, it was groundbreaking to Peter. He never took the time to consider how she must've felt, what she must've thought about him and their "relationship."

He felt overwhelmed, all of a sudden. He knew what he needed to do. "Regardless of anything, I have to break up with Gen, I am not into her like I should be. It's not fair to her." Trevor nodded, and that is when Peter realized he had said that out loud. "But I can't, man. There is so much going on at her house at the moment with her parents in such a tough place. I can't leave her. That wouldn't be right either." Trevor did not say anything this time, and the bell rung indicating they should go back to class.

It was Friday. Lara Jean was getting ready for the party with Kitty's help. She decided on a laid-back look, a soft pink skirt with a baby blue blouse and a flower-patterned bomber jacket. Bomber jackets were kind of her thing. She decided to let her hair loose and to apply some discrete nude make-up. Satisfied with her look, she made it downstairs where John Ambrose was already waiting for her, doing small talk with her father. As she saw him, her heart fluttered. He had a white button-up shirt on with a brown leather jacket on and a pair of dark blue skin-tight blue jeans complimented by a pair of sneakers that matched his jacket. He was gorgeous. Not just hot, but so much more than that.

Lost in her thoughts, she missed the look that her boyfriend gave her. He was in awe. Lara Jean was effortlessly beautiful. She did not even have to try. She just was. She mixed colors and shapes so well, her style was undeniable but her petite frame, her dimples, her shiny hair, everything made her breathtaking – oh and that light make-up that screamed pampered yet natural, was everything. He felt pins and needles across his entire body, and did not fully understand what that was. He had never reacted that way to anyone before. Not to anyone. The motions between then were so natural. She reached the last stair, he was their awaiting, taking her small hand in his. It just fits so well, he thought. And off they went.

The ride was quiet, but it was unusually quiet. John Ambrose's mind was divided between the excitement of seeing everyone after such a long time, but there was also some dreading out there. Being "Nerdy Johnny" was not a thing in middle school, nerds were still accepted back then and he hung out with the cool crowd back in the day. Transition to high school was tough, especially at Port Smith. Lara Jean sensed that something was up, John and she had talked about how they slowly slid from the cool crowd to the invisible one from middle school and high school. It was one of their many common points. It was so easy falling back into feeling like they were so much alike. She squeezed that was not on the steering wheel and murmured, softly. "It is going to be fine, John Ambrose. They are going to be thrilled to see you after all those years, just like I was." He smiled at her. That shy smile that she loved. Her heart skipped a bit. "And you know, back in the day it used to be hot commodity in middle school. Girls would be Team Peter or Team John." He smiles softly. "So long as there was one girl on Team John Ambrose," and winked at her. Lara Jean blushed and John Ambrose thought at that moment, that she could not be any cuter.

She is not accompanied, she came in alone. Peter Kavinsky's thoughts summed up to that when he initially saw Lara Jean at the door, by herself. She was gorgeous, hair loose just like he loves it and her outfit hugged her all in the right places. "Hi Lara Jean," he beamed as she was talking to Chris. He did not see Genevieve stare at him from the love seat she was sitting in. She had not seen Peter so giddy in days. She had also witnessed his eyes roaming around high school and stopping each time they landed on Lara Jean Song-Covey, her former best friend who had kissed Peter under her eyes when they were in middle school.

"Peter, it's good to see you. How are you?" She tried her best to remain composed, she hated that Peter Kavinsky still had that effect on her. If she was being honest, it was the reason why she avoided talking to him. Sure, she was mad, but Lara Jean usually did not hold a grudge. She just feared the effect Peter may have on her. That instant, while Peter Kavinsky was smiling at her softly, unable to breathe a single word, she wondered why she accepted when John Ambrose suggested she goes in while we went to find a place to park in the neighborhood. "I don't want you to have to walk if I have to park far, you look too pretty for any kind of effort," he had said. How not to give in at his sweetness, though?

"Hey," came a small whisper in her ear. It made her all smiley and giddy, it also sent shivers down her spine. She recognized him by his cologne and his particular scent. She nuzzled back in his embrace as he began to run his hand in her hair, sighing in comfort. She was so at ease that she barely noticed the look in Peter's eyes. As soon as Peter saw that brown-eyed dark-skinned guy hold Lara Jean tight to her, he was not sure whether he wanted to punch him, to punch a wall, to scream and shout, to storm out, to cry, all do that all at once. Lara Jean did not come alone, she has a boyfriend who is running his hands in her hair instead of me.

"Peter, you remember John Ambrose McClaren from middle school, right?" Peter was taken aback. He knew that the guy in front of him, who was now holding Lara Jean's hand, was familiar. Lost in his jealousy, he had not even thought of McClaren, the Sundance Kid is back. "McClaren, good to see you man! It's been, what, five years? How come you're around again?" John Ambrose smiled, he could sense a weird tension emanating from Peter, although he couldn't tell why. From what he remembered, Peter and he were friends before he left. Although he had a stutter and was a weird nerdy child, they had found a common ground for friendship. As John Ambrose was about to answer, he was engulfed in a gentle hug. "Isn't that John Ambrose McClaren? You changed for the better, Johnny," Genevieve flirted. She had sensed the tension surrounding her boyfriend and Covey and decided to cut in. "Are you here with Lara Jean?" He nodded, maintaining an arm around her shoulders, her leaning in comfortably. "It's good to see you Gen, it's been a while. And good to see that Peter and you are still going strong," he smiled. Peter felt a weird sour taste in his mouth. They were not exactly doing fine. He had decided on breaking up with Genevieve after the party. "So, McClaren, I remember you had that stutter back in the day. I just say that because you don't have it anymore."

Lara Jean shot him an annoyed look and he knew he had said the wrong thing. He just could not help taking digs at Sundance Kid, who was with Lara Jean. She was supposed to be his girl. Instead, he was still with Gen and Lara Jean had moved on. No one could blame him for feeling sour. "Well, yeah, thanks man. I appreciate it. I'll make sure to pass on your observations to my speech therapist back in Cali." The way John Ambrose handled the situation was just so John Ambrose like, though Lara Jean. Clever yet not malicious or shady, just plainly witty. He did not have an ounce of bad spirit in his entire body. At that very moment, Chris and Lucas noticed that the entrance was a bit crowded for an entrance. They noticed the scene and decided it would be a good time to jump in.

"Well, well, well. John Ambrose, I must say you look even dreamier that in my memories," Lucas said, grinning at John Ambrose and Lara Jean. Lara Jean flashed him a small smile while John Ambrose's was wider, he could see a bit of blush creeping on his cheeks. He had made John Ambrose McClaren blush, that was a day to remember. "Lucas, it's been a while. Thank you. Good to see you. You look not bad at all yourself, man!" John Ambrose replied, taking Lucas in a one-armed hug while he smiled to Chris. "Good to see you too, Christine," he beamed, but refrained from hugging her, remembering she was not a hugger.

Christine rolled her eyes. "I'll admit, McClaren, Lucas was right. Both you and Lara Jean look sickeningly cute together. Well, Lucas just said cute. I added sickeningly," she smirked before engaging in a brief hug with him. Lara Jean was surprised. It meant that Christine must've really liked John Ambrose, approved of him even, for her to hug him. They moved together from the entrance when Trevor and Greg saw John Ambrose. They recognized him immediately and ran to him, rekindling that long-lost friendship. The group was reformed for an evening, they were chatting, exchanging stories about the five years that had gone through. Tension was still in the air. Lara Jean felt the need to move to the backyard for a little while and excused herself. John Ambrose wanted to join her, but he had just turned into the star of the party, and was too polite to push the others away. Not polite not to send a text to his girl, just to let her know he was thinking of her.

From: John Ambrose McClaren

I wish I was there with you, taking in the fresh air, sweet LJ

As she was smiling at his kind gesture, she heard steps behind her. "So, Sundance Kid, huh?" She did not need to turn to know whose voice was asking her that rhetorical question. Peter Kavinsky. She grew very accustomed to his scent as well, and she would be lying if she said it did not have an effect on her or that she did not miss it. It was like a spell. She looked into his eyes, and for a second, she was not sure whether she was actually seeing or imagining jealousy, longing, regret even? He chose Genevieve, come on LJ. A part of the conversation was left unsaid. Peter wanted to tell her how beautiful she looked, how sorry he was not to have trusted their relationship more, how she should be with him. Instead, all he was able to blurt was: ""How?" She knew the question was coming. She sighed

"Remember when I told you I sent five letters, and one of them was to someone who I went to Model UN with?" He nodded, for her to continue, not sure where she was going with that. "Well, it was John Ambrose. His family moved back to Oregon the moment the letters were sent. Twists of fate, I suppose. Then, since his address changed, the Post took longer for the letter to get to him. I received a reply from him the day… Well, the day I came to see you on the field." She stopped for a second. The memory still hurts. I got back together with Genevieve. She could imagine his face when he said that. He could still read her all too well, and seeing how it affected her, he wished he could go back in time and make a different choice.

"Then, we wrote to each other a couple of times, and made plans to see each other again. But life works mysterious ways. It so happened that we both volunteer at Belleview, so we met there unexpectedly, in a very embarrassing fashion must I add," she laughed lightly at the memory of her clumsiness and the way she fell on candy. "Then, one thing led to another, and it felt just so right ever since. I can't help feeling things happen for a reason, you know?" He nodded, he knew exactly what she meant. "You mean just like the fact that I got your letter right when Gen and I were breaking up?"

There was silence filling the air. Tension too. He said that because he needed her to see that there was fate in their story, too. That Sundance Kid was not the only one with whom she had a fate factor. He knew Lara Jean, and he knew how much importance she gave to those beautiful stories about destiny and meant-to-be. Plus, he saw in her eyes that he was losing her to John Ambrose, she had that soft smile on her lips when she referred to them getting together. She used to reserve that smile to him and him only. He hated to see her so bubbly when speaking about Sundance Kid. Her boyfriend.

She cleared her throat. "Well, you got back together. I trust things between you two are fine." He shot back, instantly. "They are not. Look, Lara Jean, I wanted to say…" She felt that the conversation she feared was about to come. Leave it to Peter Kavinsky to seize the opportunity to get his way. She knew his stubbornness had no boundaries. He preferred to call it determination. "I have to go, Peter. I am sorry, but I guess should save John Ambrose from Trevor's and the others' massive interest in his life. I'll see you around."

His heart sank, he wanted to keep her around, the words did not come out though. Ironically, by the time he had thrown his hand to get a hold on her arm, she was already out of touch, leaving him out there on a field, alone yet again. He had to do something, he did not know how to proceed, but he needed to get Lara Jean back. John and Lara Jean are so alike though, he is brainy, well-mannered and all those things girl love. He is Lara Jean's masculine equivalent. At least, he used to be. How can I stand a chance, though? His thoughts were swirling around his brain, overthinking just like Lara Jean, he told himself. He did not notice that Gen had been standing outside for a little while and little did he know that she had not missed his look that followed Lara Jean through the window, when she went to settle comfortably on the couch, in John Ambrose's embrace.

"Peter, I think we should talk."