So… I may have gotten a bit obsessed with P!ATD...

"Pacifica, could you be a therapist for the next… oh, I don't know, HOUR?!"

She sighed. "What happened?"

"Bill came back."

"HE WHAT?! Wait, wait, let me get this straight… The nacho cheese guy who switched my dad's orifices or whatever… IS BACK?!" Paz said over the video call.

"Can I get a break?! Everybody keeps reacting like that and it's driving me CRAZY!" Dipper yelled as he paced around the kitchen holding his cell phone, gesturing wildly to further emphasize his point. "And insanity isn't the best thing right now." he added as he glanced at Bill, who flashed him a smug smirk, before a certain-someone snapped their fingers in front of him. "Hey, listen, you blonde jerk! I'm talking to you!"

"Can't you just ask your sister? I'm not exactly someone you should vent to, Dipper. I'm still on thin ice with mom and dad."

"Well, Mabel's not exactly in the best mood right now, either. She's currently… yelling at Bill…"

"-nd then do you know what you did?! You put me in a bubble! Freaking Mabeland! And now I can't even wear my favorite sweater anymore!"

"Uh, I think I should just hang up now." Pacifica said nervously.

"Yeah… that's probably best. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Bye."

The call ended with a beep.

"I can't eat Smile Dip without being afraid that I'll end up i-"

"Both of you. Split. It. Up. I'm not the happiest about this situation either, but now is not the time to start fighting."

"Fine." they both said in unison before glaring at each other. His sister slowly walked away into the living room, giving him the 'I'm watching you' signal, pointing two fingers at her eyes and then at him.

"Jokes on you Shooting Star, I'm a- Ow!"

"Shut up, dammit. And stop calling my sister that."

"Why?"

"Why?" Dipper snapped, whirling around to face him. "Because I said so! Unless you wanna get kicked out of here and die in the forest 2 weeks later because you don't know how to act like a normal human being!"

"Oh-hoho! Feisty! I like it! And who says that I'm a normal human being?"

The brunet inhaled, trying to manage his temper. "If you don't start trying to be civilized, Bill, you're not going to live. You don't want to die, do you?" he asked with a very serious look on his face.

"Care to tell me how you dealt with the trauma of Weirdmageddon?" he replied, changing the subject.

"Why do you care?" he spat back bitterly.

"I have nothing else to do. Besides, you said you needed a therapist." He pulled up a chair and motioned for him to sit on it. "Now, talk."

Dipper did so, only not before giving Bill a 'what the f*ck?' look. He took a deep breath, but didn't say anything.

"Talk, Pine Tree. This is your only chance."

He stared blankly at Bill in front of him.

Then it started to spill out like hot coffee onto someone's shirt.

"After, Weirdmageddon," he started, skin pale at the recounting of events, "I couldn't tell anyone, really. My parents would've thought we were insane, and because of the Nevermind All That Act, I couldn't even say anything to the townsfolk. I had to learn how to hide my feelings." As he went on, his skin gained color again and his tone started to get louder and angrier. "Even the littlest of things triggered memories, and I had to keep it undercover. For years! All because of you!" he yelled as he stood up from his chair and kicked it.

Dipper turned around to face Bill again, a wide sarcastic grin plastered on his face. "Are you happy now?"

He started to walk out of the room without an answer.

"Sarah smiles like Sarah doesn't care. She lives in a world, so unaware." Bill, randomly - out of the blue - said out loud.

"What?"

He shook his head. "Uh, nothing."

"No, what do you mean, Bill?"

There was deafening silence for the next few minutes before Bill responded again.

"I know."

"You know what?"

"I know about what you went through. I… I was watching you every summer. You can thank Axie for letting me… again."

Dipper stood there saying nothing, only mildly perplexed, so he continued.

"You smiled like you didn't care everytime someone asked you if you were okay, for someone who seems so bothered by it. You lived in that world of hiding those reactions away… you… you were so unaware…"

"Unaware about what?"

"Unaware that…"

"That… ?"

"... I love you, Dipper Pines."

He seemed shocked for a second.

"I love you two, Bill. I guess."

They hugged sincerely before hearing a loud squeal.

"EEEEEEEEEE! MY SETUP PLAN WORKED!" Mabel screamed with excitement.

"Ow! My hearing aids!" Stan complained from the other room.

"Wait, you mean your blow up with Bill was… A ROMANTIC SETUP?!"

"Yes! And you two are so cute together!" She held up her phone and took a quick picture. "Scrapbook moment!"

She ran upstairs to do just that, and the two looked at each other, Dipper blushing like a tomato.

Bill had a smug smirk on his face. "Isn't my poetry amazing?"

"Oh, shut up, you got that from Sarah Smiles by Panic! At The Disco." Dipper said, smiling as he punched Bill's shoulder playfully.

"But you still love me, hm?"

"Your going to brag about this to my face for the rest of my life, aren't you?"

"Yep." he said, popping the 'p'.

They both burst out in a fit of laughter.

Yeah, I don't know what this was either…

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