This chapter took waaaaay too long to write, mainly because I kept flip-flopping on what songs I wanted to use for this chapter. So, please know, I don't feel 100% about these songs choices (some more than others), but I want to get on with this fic, and get to some other better bits. Maybe I will rewrite this chapter later when I've found a song that fits better, but for now, enjoy!
I have created a Spotify Playlist of the songs used, so you don't have to go hunting for them. The Playlist will be updated as the fic is updated, so there'll be no spoilers about what's coming down the road.
Link is in my Profile.
Songs in this chapter in order of use, and placed in the story when to hit play:
(1) To Love's End (from "Inuyasha") – performed and arranged by Jeremy Ng (originally composed by Kaoru Wada)
(2) For Always – Josh Groban and Lara Fabian
(3) Frozen – Munich Symphonic Sound Orchestra (originally performed by Madonna) *
*There are no vocals in this version, which was what had created a lot of my hesitation with using this song, but please, imagine a voice similar to the singers I've used previously for Kagome's vocals.
"How long before Kagome comes on?" Shippo asked, leaning over towards Sango, who'd managed to grab a program sheet before they'd entered the auditorium to find their seats.
"She said she was in three separate pieces. One's just before the intermission, and the other two are towards the end," Sango explained reading over the program while the three smartly dressed young men who'd accompanied her adjusted into their seats.
"Is her family here? "Miroku asked, looking around them, though not knowing who he was looking for.
"Yeah, she said her mom, brother, and grandfather for sure were coming. Though, hopefully, her dad was able to —" she trailed off as she looked around behind them before spotting Mama Higurashi a few rows back, "Oh! I see her mom!"
Miroku, Shippo, and Inuyasha, turned back to casually look at the woman Sango was pointing towards, seeing a middle school aged boy, an elderly looking grandfather, and another man, closer to her mom's age, whom the caring woman was doting over, making sure he was comfortable. He looked lithe, pale, but in good spirits. He was in a wheelchair, a blanket gently covering his legs, and a baggy but appropriately dressed sweater covering him. Her mom sat next to him in the area designated for those with wheelchair access.
Sango politely waved, hoping the older woman would recognize her from the dozen rows that separated them. Her smile was warm as she waved back to Sango, and it reminded Inuyasha a lot of Kagome's own warm smile.
Inuyasha turned back in his seat, 'So that's her family…'
"Her dad certainly looks like he's seen better days," Shippo commented.
"Don't let Kagome hear you make comments like that," Sango replied, grabbing the younger demon's attention, though Inuyasha's ears flicked in her direction, attuned to their conversation, "Her dad's been sick for a while now. She tries to put on a brave face, but it's been deeply upsetting for her, and she doesn't like to talk about it. So just be mindful to watch what you say today."
Shippo nodded, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything by it."
Sango smiled, "I know, Shippo. But I know Kagome, and she's…" Sango paused, choosing her words carefully, "it's been hard for her. Today's her big day, and I know her dad being here will mean the world to her. So… when we see her after, try to be considerate of her and her father."
Inuyasha looked down at the stage as he listened to Sango, her comments reminding him of when he and Kagome had that conversation a few weeks ago, when he drove her home after the show in his truck, and they'd somehow gotten onto the subject about his own dad. Now it made sense why she'd gotten momentarily aloof.
In her mind, if her dad was as sick as Sango said he was, Kagome was probably dreading the worst, and didn't want to contemplate the possibility of losing her father, like Inuyasha had lost his.
Like they all had…
The four of them had a mutual bond… They'd all lost their fathers and knew what that void had felt like.
Sango's father had died due to an accident at work. He'd worked in construction and had, unfortunately, been a victim of a crane that had crashed into the building they were working on due to an earthquake, along with a few other men on the crew. It was a freak accident that was no one's fault, but it was rough on their families.
Shippo's dad was involved in a mugging that turned homicidal. Luckily, they'd caught the guys who were responsible – a pair of demon brothers who'd been trying to rob a woman at night – and Shippo's dad had been there to intervene. It ended up costing his life, but he'd saved the woman, and she had told Shippo that she was forever in his father's debt. They were still close to this day, and it had been a huge help in overcoming his loss.
Miroku's dad died when he was young, due to a genetic disease that luckily Miroku hadn't inherited. His father knew there wasn't much time, and entrusted his friend, Mushin, to watch over Miroku in his stead. However, Miroku was old enough to know his father, so it had been a hard loss to come to grips with at a young age.
Inuyasha was lucky in a way. He'd never known his old man. He died when he was still too young to remember him. In a bizarre way, he never truly had to mourn his loss. How can you mourn someone you never really knew? The only thing that hurt was how much it'd affected his mother. She was the one who'd been totally destroyed by his dad's death, and he'd seen it throughout his life… Up until her own death.
Inuyasha shook himself from the macabre thoughts as the lights in the auditorium began to dim, and the audience applauded, welcoming the entry of a cluster of students onto the stage.
"It's starting!" Sango chimed happily as they all joined in the applause, their focus now entirely on the graduating students before them.
'God… I don't think I could be more nervous,' Kagome thought to herself as she sat in front of the Green Room mirror, checking her makeup and smoothing out the invisible wrinkles in her evening dress for the umpteenth time that day.
In the faint distance, she could hear the music starting, and the roar of the applause from the audience, indicating that the performances had begun.
She flattened her hand against her stomach, in a vain attempt to ease her uneasiness. She felt like she was going to puke. Her arms and legs were shaking as she attempted to remember to breathe, taking long and deep inhales, closing her eyes and trying to block out the chaotic thoughts as she exhaled.
As she finally felt some semblance of preparedness, she felt a tap on her shoulder, causing her to let out a loud screech and making her feel like she could practically jump out of her skin. When she flipped around, she was immediately halted by Hojo who'd been taken aback by her frightened scream.
"I'm so sorry!" he quickly apologized, waving his hands in front of him in hopes of calming her down," I didn't mean to sneak up on you like that."
"Oh, Hojo…" Kagome breathed, her hands still shaking as she lowered them to her sides, "Sorry, that's my fault. I've just been so nervous; I didn't hear you."
"Don't worry. You've got no reason to be nervous! You've got this in the bag, Higurashi," he chimed encouragingly.
Kagome smiled meekly, "Thanks. I've just never performed in front of a crowd this big… or this important."
She turned back to the mirror to ensure she hadn't smeared her mascara, as she heard Hojo start, "Is there… is there anything I can do to help get rid of the nerves?" he asked, sounding so unsure of himself.
Kagome looked at him in the reflection of the mirror, his face looking like his world was hanging in the balance. Kagome gave him a reassuring smile, "I'll be fine. But thank you, Hojo. I appreciate it."
He smiled back, nodding excitedly, "Let me know if you change your mind."
She hummed a polite response as he moved to leave the room with a wave, he paused and watched her for a moment from the doorway. Kagome saw him in the mirror and looked back expectantly, "Yes?"
He was suddenly nervous himself, his grip showcasing white knuckles as he held onto the door frame, cementing him in place, perhaps in fear that if he let go, he'd run off before he could tell her what he needed to, "I just…" he hesitated, "…wanted say… how beautiful you look tonight."
A heat rose to her cheeks, as she was sure her face was a red as a tomato, as she looked down at the emerald green, flowing dress she wore, her hands brushing over the fabric again. The sleeves were long, covering the entirety of her arms down to her wrists. The collar was low, rounding across the tops of her shoulders and accentuating her collarbone as it delicately dipped down towards the waist of the dress just below her bust, carving a sliver of skin down her front that was, she hoped, tasteful. When she walked in the dress, there was a noticeably high slit in the A-line skirt over her left leg, and the skirt flowed like a cloud behind her as she moved. Luckily, for Kagome's own comfort, when she stood still, you couldn't even tell there was a slit.
She had thought the dress was too much, perhaps not being in line with the standards for the performance. However, Eri, Yuka, and Ayumi had convinced her otherwise, and gotten her to buy the dress.
"Uh… thank you, Hojo."
He laughed uncertainly before waving, "See you in the wings!"
Kagome resituated herself in the chair before the mirror, whilst hearing the overhead speakers as they called more and more of her classmates for their pieces over the next hour, she was soon alone in the Green Room, staring at her own reflection, her stomach still in knots. The anticipate was killing her, and she wished it was already over with so she didn't feel this way anymore.
She could feel the tears that longed to break free behind her eyes, stinging at the corners, but she refused to let them fall. She blinked a few times, hoping she could push the feeling back for a while longer, before shutting her eyes tightly. It wouldn't be long before she was called for her solo piano performance.
'Just a little longer,' she prayed.
"Just do it like it's last time you'll ever be able to."
The sentiment echoed through her mind, remembering the tone and timbre of Inuyasha's calming voice.
"You never know when it'll be the last time you can. Just… make sure it's a performance you'll be proud of."
A soft smile grew on her lips as she remembered Inuyasha's advice. Her hands eased their shaking and her heart beat grew slower. She slowly opened her eyes, feeling the ache of her tears fading away as she reassuringly looked into her own reflection.
"Thanks. I think that's exactly what I needed to hear."
"And for our next soloist, on piano, Miss Kagome Higurashi," the announcer proclaimed, as the audience clapped for her debut.
The auditorium practically lit up as she walked out from the left side of the stage. The cheers from her family could be heard from behind them, and Sango and Shippo's shouts of encouragement could be heard across the entire room.
Inuyasha, on the other hand, could barely applaud, his body seemingly forgetting how to work properly as he watched her move gracefully across the stage, holding all the composure of a professional. Her dress billowed elegantly behind her as she moved, like as if she was floating across the floor, before hitting the center of the platform and giving the audience a demure and well-rehearsed curtsy.
He knew it was probably the bright lights, but the longer he stared, the more it looked like she was practically glittering, like a diamond on display for the world to appreciate. He couldn't miss the deep blue in her eyes, even from such a far distance, as she rose from the curtsy, her smile, warm and bright, before taking her seat in front of the massive piano.
The applause slowly quieted, enough that you could hear a pin drop from across the auditorium, the silence almost deafening.
As she adjusted her hands to position them correctly, her back poised, and her legs holding her steady, she took a deep breath, her chest pushed out, before the first few notes fluttered into existence. (1)
Her hands moved deftly, like as if it barely took any effort at all for her to will such beautiful music into the world. There was a collective inhale from the audience as she played a run of notes at a pace that was exceptional, the lower notes resonating throughout the echoing chamber.
There was a faintness, a swiftness to her touch, that commanded power and attention with only a fraction of the exertion that it seemed would have been needed by any other individual. It demanded you listen; relentless, somber, but welcoming... and warm.
The music, her eagerness, the combination of passion and skill. If there had ever been a performance where intent of the composer was matched with a player who could accurately transcribe it into existence; emotionality and reminiscence tied in so perfectly it could never be separated… That was Kagome's performance.
Inuyasha and the others had been impressed by her singing and playing before, there was no doubt about how talented she was. But to see her, in her element, at her peak… it was almost otherworldly.
Somewhere in him, Inuyasha was reminded of something that he hadn't felt in so long. The music felt… He didn't know how to explain it. But he felt… understood by it.
For once, he was at a bit of a loss. It was rare that he reacted to music like this, as very little invigorated him in a such a way. But this piece did, and her playing of it did.
As she gracefully moved into the second half, her fingers again flited from key to key, note to note, like a hummingbird barely skimming across a flower petal.
Inuyasha looked over, the scent of salt in the air, and he could see Sango trying in vain to hold back her tears, with Miroku gently reaching over and taking her hand in his, comforting her silently. She smiled at the gesture before resting her head on his shoulder.
Shippo wasn't able to stop watching, mesmerized by Kagome's dexterity and skill, wishing he was able to command that level playing in his own performances.
The audience was transfixed, some closing their eyes as they listened to the melody, others being moved to tears as the piece became more delicate and dream-like.
It was like being called home.
As she played the last few notes precisely and determinately, there was a collective breath being held by each audience member, awaiting the last remaining echo of the note to fade from their minds. Kagome quietly sat for a moment to let the moment sink in before she dared to move, a shaky breath leaving her as the audience erupted into a roar of applause. She smiled the biggest, most enlighted, smile, before again curtsying.
The whistles and claps were nearly deafening, as she lifted herself up and moved just as gracefully off the stage.
As she approached the backstage area, her classmates applauded her as well.
"That was amazing, Kagome!" her friends cheered.
"See, we knew you had nothing to worry about," Eri joked.
Kagome felt more at ease, having now completed one of the three performances, "Yeah, just gotta get through the other two now."
The audience came and went for the intermission, though there was clearly only one performance on their minds and they were eager to hear more from the young ingénue who'd captured the audience's attention so thoroughly.
Inuyasha was hesitant to discuss he's admiration for her performance, though the others openly gushed, trying to prod a response from their bandmate.
"Come on, Inuyasha. A performance like that and you have nothing to say?" Miroku teased as they wandered back to their seats.
"Whatd'ya expect from me?" he retorted begrudgingly, "Yeah, sure, it was great. She's really somethin'. Now, will ya get off my back?!"
"Don't sulk, Inuyasha. I saw your face, you were just as dazzled as the rest of us, if not more," Shippo poked his ribs, antagonizing his friend in the hopes of getting a hilarious response.
Inuyasha growled with frustration, offering a quick swat to the younger demon's head, "Shut up!"
"My, my… Looks like our beloved band leader may be smitten. Never thought I'd see the day," Sango piled on as they all laughed.
"You guys don't know what you're talkin' about," Inuyasha turned and grumbled under his breath, refusing to let them win out.
He knew they were just teasing but… somewhere in the back of his mind, he wondered…
No, there was no way he was having those kinds of feelings for her… No, it wasn't possible. Besides, what kind of person starts to have feelings for someone just because of their musical talent?
'Well, it's not just that…' he thought.
When he'd thought back to their conversations, when they were alone… He knew there was something there. She'd brought out a side in him, a side of himself he hadn't recognized in almost a decade. What the hell was this girl doing to him?
He couldn't dwell much longer on it before the lights came down once more, and the stage was set for larger groups of performances.
One by one, variations of strings, wind, brass, and all sorts of combinations in between played their pieces, and continued to delight the crowd. But in the back of their minds, they waited for Kagome to return to the stage.
"Up next, we have our duet vocal performance, featuring Mr. Akitoki Hojo and Miss Kagome Higurashi, and orchestration by the class of 2019."
The roar of the audience was somehow even louder than before, though there was no dramatic walk out from the pair. Instead the lights went out completely, the darkness engulfing the space. As the crowd settled and quieted, there were a few shuffles and scuffs heard in the darkness before a few gentle taps could be heard from the conductor, a soft swell beginning from the orchestra. (2)
The lights slowly raised, with Kagome having a spotlight fade on her position towards the right side of the stage. She stood before a microphone, her eyes cast downward, and with a great inhale, she released the first few notes that immediately bewitched the audience once more.
I close my eyes
And there in the shadows I see your light
You come to me out of my dreams across
The night
Another spotlight slowly rose and exposed Hojo standing on the far-left side of the stage, timing himself as his voice resonated throughout the auditorium, earning an audible gasp from the audience members.
You take my hand
Though you may be so many stars away
I know that our spirits and souls are one
Kagome rejoined him in the song as they started to sing in tandem, her voice emotive and lilting. Her eyes remained downcast as she sang, unable to make eye-contact with anyone in the audience, for fear that she'd suddenly grow nervous.
We've circled the moon and we've touched the sun
So here we'll stay
For always
Forever
Beyond here and on to eternity
For always
Forever
For us there's no time and no space
No barrier love won't erase
Wherever you go
I still know in my heart you will be
With me
A visceral pulse thudded across the air before the song continued, rippling through their chests. Inuyasha wasn't sure he'd even blinked since she started to sing until he felt that pulse.
From this day on
I'm certain that I'll never be alone
I know what my heart must have always known
That love has a power that's all it's own
And for always
Forever
Now we can fly
And for always
and always
We will go on beyond goodbye
For always
Forever
Beyond here and on to eternity
For always
And ever
You'll be a part of me
And for always
Forever
One thousand tomorrows may cross the sky
And for always
And always
We will go on beyond goodbye
The applause from the audience couldn't wait until the end, as the roar collapsed into the trailing of their voices and the music.
Kagome and Hojo both looked towards each other as they smiled, pleased with their performance before they bowed. Hojo, taking a second, approached Kagome from his side of the stage, shocking her for a moment, as he took her hands in his and kissed her cheek. A blush quickly flushed her face as Hojo stepped back and applauded with the audience at her performance, inviting her to take another bow.
As she readjusted herself, feeling suddenly unsure, she took the skirt of her dress and bowed before the lights when dark again, allowing her and Hojo to take their places for the final performance.
'Why the hell did he have to kiss me like that'" Kagome wondered to herself, suddenly feeling overwhelmed by nerves again. She had been so calm and felt at such ease, but now, it was like her nausea came back with full force. And of course, just before they were to start her piece.
The announcer came on and calmly said, "And now, for the final performance of the evening, the class of 2019."
Kagome, trying her hardest to settle herself as she sat at the piano, mumbled, '"Get it together, girl."
The audience quieted once more, as the conductor took their spot at the podium. They made eye contact with Kagome, awaiting her cue that she was ready.
She bit her lip, and attempted a few deep calming breaths. Kagome felt a sudden rush of adrenaline, compelling her to look up and out at the audience. She knew she shouldn't have, thinking it would only worsen her nerves. In her mind, she hoped to see her father or her mother, with their glowing smiles to encourage her.
But when she did look out, it was like her eyes were drawn to a magnet, one that she couldn't tear herself from. As the darkness of the room fell away, she felt like she could only see the bright, golden eyes, the ones she could always tell her watching her, staring back from across the floor in an unbroken gaze.
Inuyasha could feel her eyes connect with his as he saw her worry her lip, realizing she was suddenly nervous. But he knew she could do it. He offered her a knowing smirk and a shallow nod of acknowledgment, as if reminding her of what he'd said.
Her heart fluttered for a moment, the same feeling she had from their show two weeks ago. He saw her and she suddenly was awash with bliss.
A smile crossed her lips as she turned back to the conductor, her hands ready on the keys, and nodding that she was ready to go.
With a light tap, the conductor began, the strings and brass section starting with a light hum. (3)
As Kagome took in a breath, her fingers lightly pressed against the keys, and she began to sing.
You only see what your eyes want to see
How can life be what you want it to be?
You're frozen… when your heart's not open
You're so consumed with how much you get
You waste your time with hate and regret
You're broken... when your heart's not open
The class began to swell, the independent players coming together is a hum of harmonized chorus, Kagome's voice vibrating with it.
Mmm... Mmm... Mmm... If I could melt your heart
Mmm... Mmm... Mmm... We'd never be apart
Mmm... Mmm... Mmm... Give yourself to me
Mmm... Mmm... Mmm... You... hold... the key
With the bright and sharp bellow from the trumpets, the pulsing of the cellos echoing as a silence overtook the audience, enraptured in their playing and the story of the piece.
Kagome remained focused on her singing, unable to bring herself to look up from her piano. It felt like her chest was warm and pulsating a mile a minute. She could feel her skin growing slightly clammy as she continued, adrenaline thoroughly rushing through her whole body.
Now there's no point in placing the blame
And you should know I'd suffer the same
If I lose you... my heart will be broken
Love is a bird... she needs to fly
Let all the hurt inside of you die
You're frozen... when your heart's not open
The orchestra was practically resonating, all the instruments bringing together the various parts, and reaching the crescendo of the chorus, Kagome's voice the final key to bringing it all to its final form.
Mmm... Mmm... Mmm... If I could melt your heart
Mmm... Mmm... Mmm... We'd never be apart
Mmm... Mmm... Mmm... Give yourself to me
Mmm... Mmm... Mmm... You... hold... the key
Mmm... Mmm... Mmm... If I could melt your heart
Mmm... Mmm... Mmm... We'd never be apart
The conductor gestured to almost silence the orchestra, everyone's ears ringing from the sudden quiet, before they slowly raised their hand, bringing in that low hum of the strings once more.
As the movement started, the flutists played their last section, bringing the entire piece to its final conclusion and letting the auditorium once again fall into deafening silence.
A moment passed… then another.
Kagome felt like she'd blacked out; like she was outside her own body. She let her fingers drift down the side of the keys, resting her hands on the bench and leaning on it as if to regain herself and her bearings.
It wasn't until she felt a hand on her shoulder that she realized where she was and that there was a roar from the audience, their applause suddenly taking over her senses. Her classmates were all standing and bowing, before turning towards her and applauding as well.
"Kagome, take a bow!" came the voice of the conductor, who'd come over to allow her to have her moment in the spotlight.
Kagome quickly stood from the bench, almost tripping as she clumsily walked in front of the piano, and bowed. She rose from her position, only now daring to look out once again, now that the performance was finished.
'I did it… I did it, Dad…' she thought to herself.
That chapter has been a hurdle to write, and I apologize for the many months of delays. I moved at the end of 2020, and I have just recently started a new relationship with someone, not to mention this chapter itself was giving me some serious writers block.
I can't wait to move on with this fic and finally get to some of the bits I've been waiting to write.
If you guys want more of this fic, please be sure to leave a review, or follow/favorite the story, as it's a great indicator/motivator for me to keep writing.
Until Next Time…