Julia – Brainwashing Type
A lie told once remains a lie, but a lie told a thousand times becomes the truth
Julia had always been quiet and soft-spoken for as long as she could remember. She always attributed it to a combination of both Julius' sickly nature and discomfort at the attention she earned as the imperial princess. Whatever the reason, her shyness had forever been one of her defining traits. Fighting alongside Seliph to topple the Loptyr Church had done wonders for her confidence, but an incident in the twilight hour of the holy war had set back her progress by leagues.
Though Manfroy used her as a lifeless puppet to carry out Loptous' demented will for barely an hour before her Lord Brother broke the spell, she had been left with all manner of lingering mental scars. Striking down her own brother shortly thereafter had only made things worse and left her barely able to eat or sleep, lest she cover her meal in bile or be assailed by horrific night terrors. Though she knew it was her purpose to fight and oppose Loptous' twisted evil, had said as much to Seliph on the eve of their final battle, and would do it all again if she had to, she hadn't anticipated that the aftereffects of carrying out her cause would affect her so heinously.
The first few days after their victory, she would be seized by random bouts of nausea and forcefully discharge the contents of her mostly empty stomach. The sickly yellow puddles she spewed left an acidic taste in her mouth that no amount of water seemed able to wash out (not that she was able to keep much water down in the first place). Seliph desperately wanted to alleviate her ails, and she eagerly accepted whatever aid he tried to give, but Nanna said it was 'an affliction of the soul' that nothing but time could heal.
Seven days after her harrowing experience, she began to feel as though time was indeed beginning to soothe her scarred spirit…and then suddenly found herself in a foreign land before a white cloaked stranger. Well, it wasn't completely sudden – she'd heard a voice implore her for aid and decided that she couldn't ignore so earnest a plea, personal troubles be damned. She just didn't expect to be whisked across time and space was all.
It wasn't like Askr was the worst place to end up – far from it, in fact. Most of the Order of Heroes were as kind as could be and every bit as reliable as her friends in the liberation army Seliph had led. Speaking of, several of them were actually part of the Order in some form or another, though the specifics varied wildly from Hero to Hero. There was a Larcei who had yet to leave Isaach fighting alongside a Seliph who'd ruled as King of Graanvale for nearly two months before being summoned.
As comforting as the familiar faces were, that in and of itself was her biggest problem – they were only familiar. They weren't the same people she'd fought alongside, which meant she had no right to share her troubles with them. From what she gathered, Seliph had been the one to strike down Julius in his world, so he'd merely had to console a Julia recovering from the ordeal of being Manfroy's slave. How could she abruptly saddle him with grief that not only had he long since healed, but which was even harsher than what he was familiar with?
No, she would never be so selfish as to make him shoulder a burden like that. But that left her with little recourse other than to keep her pain bundled up inside. After all, if she couldn't ask her Lord Brother to bear her anguish, she couldn't exactly ask anybody else to take up so heavy a task. So, she resigned herself to training and fighting whilst praying that the ever-present anxiety and nonexistent appetite would eventually pass. She received plenty of concerned inquires, of course – it was impossible for her to perfectly hide the woe picking at her mind – but she always waved them off with assurances that she was merely having difficulty adjusting to Askr.
There was a single bedrock on which she steadied herself that came from a singularly unexpected source: the Summoner himself, Kiran. Amidst a sea of turmoil, he acted as an island of stability. There was just something about the man that made her feel grounded, feel secure whenever she was listening to his commands. When he looked at her and issued an order, she was able to briefly forget the inner turbulence that plagued her. Like Seliph, he had the air of someone who could lead the world to peace. But while she had to come to grips with the fact that her brother was not her brother, Kiran had no such conflicts. He was a stranger, but…he was an oddly comforting one.
That comfort was given tangible form one day when, upon returning from a routine patrol, Kiran called out to her before she could slink off to be by herself. "Julia, hold on for a second."
She flinched at the sudden address while the other Heroes she'd fought with went their separate ways, but stayed put all the same. "Um, yes? W-what is it?" Her head ducked in shame when she considered a possible reason for having his attention. "Did I…mess up on the patrol?"
"No! No, nothing like that." He was quick to wave off her fears, which prompted her to meet his gaze once again. "I just thought…" He sighed and shot her a concerned look. "Are you doing alright, Julia?"
"Oh, um…" This was a question she'd heard plenty of times before, of course. By all rights, she should've had no trouble allaying his concerns with a little white lie. After all, if she wasn't willing to bother normal Heroes with her problems, troubling the Great Hero ought to have been absolutely out of the question. And yet…there was something about Kiran asking the query that made her want to open up to him. Knowing that he cared about her well-being felt the same way listening to his orders did – it felt safe. She couldn't explain why, but she felt that if she confessed her difficulties to him, Kiran would…take care of her.
So, for reasons she didn't fully understand, she decided to speak the truth for the first time since she arrived in Askr. "T-to be honest, I…" she wrung her hands together and looked to the ground, "I feel uneasy…"
"Uneasy?" He repeated, his tone making it clear he'd hoped for more details. Understandably so – she could hardly have picked a vaguer descriptor if she tried.
"I-it's difficult to describe…" She glanced towards some nondescript part of the castle wall. "Before I came here, I was involved in several…incidents at the end of the holy war. I'm sure you have some idea of what from talking to Seliph. Well, those incidents have had…lasting effects. Effects that I'm still dealing with, even now."
It appeared he had talked to Seliph, because his eyes widened in understanding while his gaze and tone became much more sympathetic. "Julia, why haven't you said anything about this before? You shouldn't have to go through something like this alone – I know Seliph, if nobody else, would be happy to offer whatever help he could."
She knew he was too; he'd asked her if he could do anything for her a few days ago. Ostensibly, the offer was for any kind of aid in general, but she was smart enough to read between the lines and see what his true intentions were. "I know that he would…but his help isn't mine to take. He has his own Julia to worry about, and I could never be so selfish as to add to his troubles."
"He wouldn't see it that way, Julia." Kiran tried to convince her, though he seemed to know as well as she did that his words fell on deaf ears. He sighed to himself before crossing his arms. "Well, I don't have any other Julias – why didn't you come to me until I forced your hand? I make it my job to help people out, you know."
"I-I know, it's just…" She couldn't exactly admit that she'd been struck by a sudden feeling that he would provide her with some form of sanctuary. Nor could she admit that just talking to him was slowly soothing her mind. "…I don't know why I've held off from coming to you."
"Whatever the reason might've been, I'm here now. Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?"
She'd intended to wave him off with an assurance that this chat had been more than enough. But before she realized it, an answer was spilling from her lips. "Um, if it wouldn't be too much trouble…could I stay near you today?" Once the words left her mouth, she clamped it shut and tried to stifle her embarrassed flush. Gods, what was wrong with her, asking something so presumptuous? And yet…the request had felt completely natural to make. Like she was meant to be near him…
Luckily, if his amused snort was any indication, he didn't take offense. "I can honestly state that's not what I was expecting you to say. Still, I guess that should be easy enough. I was just going to hole up in my office and go through paperwork for the rest of the day, so you can hang out up there with me if it would seriously help."
Had it been someone else making the offer, she probably would've tried to backpedal and insist that she was actually fine on her own. But something in the back of her mind told her that she couldn't afford to waste this opportunity. She had to take this chance, or else she might never have peace of mind again. "That'd be perfect!" She exclaimed before he had a chance to rescind the proposal. "I-I mean, yes, thank you. You're very kind to accommodate me like this."
He proved his kindness further by waving off her gratitude as unnecessary. "Ah, don't worry about it. Doesn't cost anything to let you crash on the couch, so it's not like I have any reason to turn you down."
"All the same, thank you, Kiran. You've no idea how much this'll do for me." At his beckoning, she followed behind him as they made their way to the castle's central tower. Already, her constantly frayed nerves had begun to settle down. Just being here at his side…it felt safe. It felt like she would be able to actually enjoy the day sleep soundly after the setting of the sun. She knew in her heart that the decision to open up to Kiran had been a wise one.
And she didn't much like the thought of losing this repose now that she finally had it again.
The dining hall was, as usual, packed to the brim with Heroes eager to fill their stomachs after a long day of work. Some enjoyed their meals (either by tearing into them or by exercising well practiced etiquette) and some chose to use the opportunity to indulge in social pleasantries.
Julia was doing neither – though she had a full plate of food in front of her, her attention was nowhere near her own table. On the contrary, her eyes were fixed firmly at one point that was barely visible through the throng of bodies: the spot where, surrounded by the Askrans, Kiran was sitting. She watched him animatedly chat with the royalty of this realm and any Hero who happened to wander past and exchange a few words. Before she realized it, her cheek was resting in the palm of her hand and her lips had pulled themselves into a wistful smile.
Her instincts had been correct: Kiran had taken care of her. Sitting by his side while he worked had brought her peace of mind that she'd not felt since before Julius had been taken by the Tome of Loptous. His mere presence was a soothing balm to her soul. Five days after their initial afternoon together, she was far less troubled than usual, and yet…she began to crave that same tranquility again. She needed that feeling of security once more. And so, quite innocently, she'd requested permission to be with him a second time. He was bemused, but accepted her appeal all the same.
That was a week and a half ago now. She coveted the sanctuary of his presence even now, but was wary of pushing her luck too far – he was terribly busy, after all. But she was able to make do at the moment with just the sight of him. And she was trying to commit as much of said sight to memory as she could: his joyous smile, the way his shoulders rolled as he laughed, how he gestured to describe whatever he was talking about. Everything about him was just wonderful…
"Julia!"
She was startled out of her observations by a sudden call of her name. She turned to see Seliph, standing on the other end of her table with a tray of food in his hands and a teasing grin on his face. "L-Lord Brother! When did you get here?"
"Oh, about a minute and a half ago." He answered, his tone just as playful as his expression. "I felt I should give you a few moments longer to enjoy yourself before getting your attention. Of course, the first few times I tried, you didn't respond – in fact, you just dreamily sighed…" Oh gods, this was mortifying. Had she really been sighing to herself? She tried to ignore the flare of heat the burst in her cheeks as he chuckled and settled across from her. "So, who's the lucky man?"
"I-I beg your pardon?!" She asked, her blush no doubt redder than a tomato.
"Come now, Julia, there's no need to be coy. I've hung around Shannan when Larcei was nearby, you know. I recognize a lovesick girl when I see one."
"Wha-? B-but I'm not–!" L-lovesick? Her?! She had no recourse from his assessment other than to cup her cheeks and avert her eyes.
In return, he put his hands up and dialed back his tongue-in-cheek attitude. "Okay, perhaps I'm being a bit up front about this. I ought not have been so forward about teasing you." His demeanor became surprisingly serious. "But my ultimate point still stands: whomever you were looking at just now, you were absolutely starstruck at the sight of them. Maybe it isn't my place to tell you what your heart is saying, but I find it difficult to describe whatever emotion filled your eyes without calling it some form of love."
"Um, w-well, I suppose that maybe…" Could he be right? She wouldn't deny that she'd been admiring Kiran, but to go so far as to say she was smitten with him…
"Julia," Seliph called once more and rested his hand atop hers, his voice now much softer. "I have not been blind to how troubled you've been ever since you were summoned. When you brushed aside my concerns, I was willing to respect your wishes and let you deal with your woes on your own, even if it wounded my heart to watch you live from day to day so distraught."
He shot her a cheerful smile. "But these past couple weeks have seen you returned to the happiness and love of life I remember best in you. No longer has your brow been creased with pain known only to you. No more do you stumble to grasp your heart and head in hopes of alleviating some inner grief." He squeezed her hand ever so slightly. "You're finally living again, Julia. I feel protective of you, naturally, but if this restoration of your spirit is thanks to you falling in love, then I wholeheartedly support you and hope for the best."
His sincerity had swept away any lingering embarrassment from his initial teasing, leaving only uncertainty in its place. "I-I'm…" She swallowed and cast her gaze towards her untouched meal. "I'm just not sure…"
"Then you need not sort your feelings out here and now. Perhaps I am mistaken and have needlessly confused you…but I must ask that you not ignore my words entirely." He retracted his hand, giving her ample excuse to meet his gaze and appreciate the warmth contained within. "Whatever the reason, you're happy now, Julia. And I only want that happiness to endure. If it would help, would you rather I make myself scarce and leave you be?"
"No!" Julia was surprised by how swiftly she rejected his offer. "I-I mean," she took a breath to collect herself, "no, please stay. You're right, I am much happier now – and that means I've no reason to turn away the pleasure of your company." She glanced away in shame. "I shouldn't have been shunning you for any reason. If you'd have me, I'd love to make up for lost time."
She heard him softly chuckle. "Of course I'd be delighted to spend time with you, Julia. You needn't even ask."
She finally managed to meet his smile with one of her own. "Thank you, Lord Brother."
They proceeded to chat about this and that, neither one as engaged in the topic of conversation as they were with the mere fact that they were, at long last, appreciating each other's companionship again. Julia had forgotten how to enjoy simple pleasures like Seliph's presence – the fact that he wasn't her Seliph didn't seem to matter anymore. It would've been one thing to dump her problems onto him, but there was no harm in sharing a meal and some kind words, was there? If there was any such harm, Julia never found it the entire hour she spent with her half-brother.
All the while, she didn't fail to remember both whom she had to thank for allowing her to open up once more and Seliph's assessment of what she felt for the man in question. She kept him in the back of her mind all through the rest of dinner and well into the evening, until at last she had the privacy to give him the consideration he was due
Love, hm…? Once she was back in the safety of her room, Julia dedicated all her thoughts to the question Seliph had raised in her mind. While she mused, she laid atop her bed and hugged her pillow against her chest. Do I actually know what love is? Is it even possible to fall in love so quickly?
The first question had no obvious answer, but the second wasn't so difficult once she put her mind to it. She had never witnessed it personally, but she'd heard the stories about her mother and Lord Sigurd of Chalphy. If the tales were true, the two had become hopelessly enamored with one another practically within a day of meeting. She wished she could've had a chance to see what that looked like – though there were a Sigurd and Deirdre here in the Order, the latter suffered from total amnesia and remembered neither Sigurd nor Julia herself.
Still, there was no reason for anyone to lie about the strength of her love with her first husband. If her mother could fall hopelessly in love in a short timeframe, then surely she could as well, no? But that only brought her back to her initial question: was what she felt actually love? Seliph had advised her to listen to her heart, so what was it saying?
She closed her eyes and imagined Kiran in the place of her pillow. Right away, her chest became filled with a burst of warmth and a pleased hum drew unbidden from her throat. She squeezed her pillow tighter and pretended Kiran's arms were wrapping around her in turn. Even as nothing more than a fantasy, the image in her mind felt absolutely perfect. From the core of her soul, she instinctively knew that the scenario playing out in her head was meant to be. She couldn't even will herself to picture another man in his place – the overwhelming sense of wrongness any attempt produced stopped her cold.
Well, she now knew for certain how her heart felt about having Kiran in her life (and how it felt about having anyone else in his place). So, what about the opposite scenario: what if she was bereft of Kiran for the rest of her days. Hesitantly, she tried to envision what that was like and was immediately seized by an icy grip of terror that left her unable to so much as breathe. Without wasting a second, she pretended her pillow was Kiran again and felt the all-consuming panic fade away.
Now that her little thought experiment had run its course, there was only one possible conclusion to draw from it: she couldn't live without Kiran. Seliph had been right – if there was a word to describe what she felt other than love, she couldn't think of it. And if she loved Kiran, all that remained was to find some way to get him to reciprocate that love and never leave her side. There was just one small, minor little problem in the way…
Kiran was already in a dedicated relationship with Lady Cecilia of Elibe.
Though she'd tried to ignore it at the time, Julia recalled how Cecilia was right next to Kiran in the dining hall and how he'd sent her away during their time together because his lover was due to arrive soon. It went without saying that he valued Cecilia more than her, much as the mere thought of that made her chest tighten with pain. But that pain brought clarity with it and made it obvious what her next step would have to be.
If Julia wanted to hold Kiran in her arms for real, she would need to find some way to remove Cecilia from the picture.
But how to go about doing that? Gods forbid she even think about something extreme like killing Cecilia – the Mage General had no right being in what should've been Julia's position, but that was just because of some cruel accident of fate that saw them summoned in the order that they were. Besides, even if she did try to kill Cecilia, she wouldn't know the first thing about being away from witnesses or disposing of the corpse…no, it was better to avoid murder. In any case, Cecilia would be hurt enough by heartbreak when Kiran inevitably left her, so there was no point in making her pain any greater than it had to be, right? Yet, then what was she to do…?
Suddenly, she was struck by a bolt of inspiration. She'd come to realize she loved Kiran partially by thinking of her mother's relationship with Lord Sigurd…but that relationship hadn't stopped her father from having his empress, had it? Arvis had once been in the same position she was, and while he'd ultimately struck Sigurd down, he'd already won Deirdre's affection by then, no? Albeit, she was fairly sure he'd only been able to do so thanks to Manfroy warping her mother's mind, but the point remained the same. Her parents had been happy together – how they came to be a couple didn't matter. Had it not been for Manfroy's machinations with the Tome of Loptous, her and Julius would've grown up content under their parents' picture-perfect marriage.
Deirdre had been made to forget about Sigurd so that Arvis could take his place, so she needed only to make Kiran forget about Cecilia and fill the resulting void herself. Though, it wouldn't be quite that simple; Manfroy had put plenty of distance between Sigurd and Deirdre before contorting her memories, but neither Kiran nor Cecilia could go anywhere but Askr any time soon. While she couldn't just follow her father's footsteps exactly, the basic idea was still applicable.
She just needed to find some way to forcibly replace Cecilia in Kiran's heart. If she could, she'd replace her in the physical world just the same. She hadn't the faintest clue how to do that yet, but she was certain she'd figure it out. She had to figure it out – her future with Kiran depended on it.
It had taken several days of clandestine research, but Julia finally found what she was looking for in a dark, untouched corner of the castle archives' most antediluvian wing. Only the noblest and accomplished Heroes ('Legendary' Heroes, they were sometimes called) were allowed in this part of the library; by contrast, 'Heroes' like her full brother were explicitly forbidden from even setting foot near this place. As she traced her fingers along the pitch-black cover of her prize, she acknowledged the rule had a good reason for existing.
She had begun to lose hope when her initial searches failed to bear fruit. Since she couldn't exactly ask anyone for help in her quest, she had no recourse other than to scour towering bookshelves all on her own. The problem with that approach was that there were countless tomes filling the racks, and she wasn't sure where to begin. Her hunt had been largely aimless, since the kind of magic that affected the mind wasn't liable to be openly advertised as such, until today. She was walking past a shelf when she…felt a presence call out to her. She could sense something amidst the books drawing her attention, as if she were hearing a seductive whisper of her name.
She found the tome in question with no difficulty, as it was positioned only a couple feet off the ground. The second her skin touched the ancient leather binding it, she intuitively knew that this was what she had been looking for. A cursory flip through its pages confirmed her gut feeling and caused a jubilant smile to bloom across her face – by all appearances, it looked to be a spell designed to afflict people who were already in love. It would target their heart and redirect the affection they felt for someone else towards the caster. The only drawback she could see was that it would only work in small increments, likely to keep the target from realizing anything was amiss. But that made no difference to her; the war wasn't even remotely close to concluding, so she had all the time in the world to help Kiran realize who was really special to him.
Her exhilaration at finding a tome so tailor made for her was tempered by a spot of confusion when she thumbed back to the initial pages to find a note scrawled in unfamiliar handwriting. Its sloppy penmanship indicated that it was written in haste, and the author clearly wasn't whoever wrote the spell on the main pages. With a curious tilt of her head, she began to read.
To whomever is unfortunate enough to have come into possession of this damned tome,
I can only pray that you read this with no intention of ever casting the spell contained within. These wretched pages are cursed and will surely bring devastation to any foolish enough to follow their instructions. If by some foul purpose you intend to actually use the magic described here, then I hope I can dissuade you before your selfishness destroys the lives of those around you.
The primary purpose of this tome is what it appears to be: through the darkest of sorceries, it will twist the mind of whomever you desire and cause them to believe that you are the true recipient of their heart's passions. But this apparent honesty is merely a guise for its secondary, even more insidious function. For as your target is compelled to love you, so too shall you be compelled to love them, at the expense and detriment of all else. Comrades, friends, even family will come to mean absolutely nothing to you.
What that entails depends on how blackened your soul is – in my sister, it drove her to regard I and the rest of our family with naught but cold apathy. Even as our father, whom she'd once regarded with unyielding adoration, laid dying from the plague, she saw him as little more than an annoyance that took time from her 'beloved'. If I understand these accursed scriptures correctly, that was the best we could've hoped for – a darker, fouler mind will feel contempt instead of apathy and find itself bereft of any social or moral inhibitions that may have held it back before. I shudder to think of the crimes such a person would happily commit after prolonged use of this despicable book.
But I suppose that such a person wouldn't heed my warnings anyway. Perhaps the most rotten trait of this scourge is its ease of use – unlike most dark magic, it's incredibly simple to wield. So long as the caster has basic competency in the arcane arts, they need only have the conviction to see the spell's effects take hold. I imagine the madman who conjured up this bane did that on purpose, so that its disastrous side effects would spread more easily.
If only I could've destroyed this damnable thing, I would have done so ages ago. Alas, the same black magic that gives this tome its power has also placed it beyond the threat of annihilation by myself or any that I know. Nor do I dare risk casting it to waste away said magic. I intend to deal with the threat this book poses by delivering it to King Líf. I have full confidence that he will seal it away so that none who would seek to use its evil sorcery shall ever find it.
For your sake, I pray that I am successful and that my prior warnings have been unnecessary.
Once she was finished, Julia stood there blinking for a few seconds. Well, she thought, that was…odd. It was also obviously exaggerated – if this tome had the ability to win her Kiran's love, it couldn't be evil, no matter what that note's author said. In all likelihood, he was like Prince Ephraim and far more protective of his sister than he ought to be; once she'd found a man to love, he was probably just bitter that she no longer hung off of his arm.
And even if she took everything he said at face value, she still wouldn't put the tome away and try to forget about it. For doing so would be tantamount to giving up Kiran, and she refused to do that. She had already lost her parents, struck down Julius and could envision a life without Seliph – so what if she had to give them a little less space in her heart to make room for Kiran? She couldn't bear the thought of living without him, and so didn't even need to think about whether or not she was willing to pay some kind of price to have him.
Nor did she intend to delay a second longer in having him. As far as she could tell, the spell was activated by a simple incantation that needed to be said while the book was open and she had Kiran in her sights. The tome could be easily hidden in her long, flowing sleeves and the words needed only to be said aloud in some capacity – the volume didn't seem to matter. Auspiciously, it appeared to be as easy to use as that note writer claimed it was. Which meant she didn't have any time to lose.
Right away, she set out from the archives to find her quarry. It was midday, so he ought to be returning to his office from the dining hall. She positioned herself at the end of the hallway she figured he would have to cross to tread his route, making sure that the chosen passage was far out of the way from the usual avenues other Heroes took after lunch. Sure enough, she had scarcely waited five minutes when she heard the rhythmic tapping of footsteps at the end of the corridor. She peered around the corner she was hiding behind and her heart skipped a beat when she saw Kiran striding towards her. She almost thought the tome was throbbing against her wrist, bidding her to use its power.
You don't have to tell me twice… She steeled her nerves and rounded the corner, trying to make her movement look as natural as possible. Kiran saw her and wore the same small grin he always did when running into a Hero. "Hey, Julia." He acknowledged her with a nod but otherwise made no motion to stop and chat. She reciprocated the nod, her lips too dry from anxiety to form any words suited to conversation.
Once they passed each other, she twisted her head back towards him, her left hand reaching into her right sleeve to spread the tome open. In a hushed voice that was barely louder than a breath, she whispered, "Rel Mani Ex."
Instantly she could feel her heart and soul tugging towards Kiran. Her breath hitched in her throat and she involuntarily turned around to face him. He too had stopped dead in his tracks, and after a moment of silence tilted his head backwards. Once his attention was on her, Julia composed herself enough to softly smile and wave. A few seconds later, he smiled and waved back. Once he did, he considered their exchange concluded and went back to his business of making his way to his office.
Now that she was left alone again, Julia was able to breathe freely once more. "H-he waved at me…" She muttered to herself, her lips widening in excitement. She pulled the tome from her sleeve and hugged it against her chest. "He waved at me!" She squealed and fought the urge to start hopping in place. The gesture had admittedly been a minor one, but it was far more than he usually gave to passing Heroes. Thinking of that, along with the way he stopped still, or the way she felt their souls connect across the aether…it was all proof that her new tome had worked.
She wasn't sure how long she stood there, bouncing on her heels with her tome wrapped in her arms, before a sudden sound drew her out of her reverie. "Julia!" The second she heard her name, she instinctively slid the book back into her sleeve to keep it hidden from any prying eyes that might not have understood its value. She gave her attention to the source of the new voice, which turned out to be Seliph crossing the hall from the same direction Kiran had once approached.
"Oh, Lord Brother!" She greeted, her spirits still higher than the moon. "What brings you here?"
"I was looking for you." He explained. "I was worried when you missed lunch, but it appears you had a good reason – you look positively elated. I hope it wouldn't be presumptuous of me to ask why?"
"Of course not!" She assured him. "Especially when I partially have you to thank for my happiness." He raised a curious eyebrow, prompting her to clasp her hands together and elaborate, "You were right, Seliph: I'm in love! And I just made progress on winning his heart!"
In no time at all, Seliph was sharing in her jubilation. "Why, that's wonderful news! I don't suppose I could be so fortunate as to learn the name of the man who won your affection?"
She almost let Kiran's name slip but managed to clamp her jaw shut just in time. He wouldn't understand. She reminded herself. He'll think it's 'wrong'. He'll try to stop me if he knows. The smile fell from her face and she thumbed the spine of her tome to comfort herself. If she was paying attention, she would've noticed that the final thought to pass through her mind sounded like her own voice layered with someone else's.
He can't be trusted.
"O-oh, no, not yet." She stammered and avoided his gaze. "Not until after we're together."
Fortunately, he interpreted her mistrust as embarrassment and chuckled. "Very well then, keep your secrets. But that just means he gets an earful about treating you right later rather than sooner!" Julia didn't offer a response – she imagined he'd probably end up seeing Kiran as a womanizer for leaving Cecilia for her. "Well, in any case, are you free? I've some time before my scheduled afternoon duels and haven't seen you much these past few days."
"Yes, of course." She automatically responded and followed Seliph's ensuing lead towards the training grounds. Seliph could be her undoing if he knew what she was up to, but there was no harm in exchanging some idle conversation with him, right? Her answer hadn't even been a lie since she was free of any responsibilities for the day. And yet, the words didn't feel quite right as they left her mouth. For the next couple hours, as she and Seliph chatted about various subjects, she just wasn't able to shake off a nagging feeling…
Why was she bothering with him when she could've been devoting her time to Kiran instead?
For the next month, not a day went by that didn't see Julia use her wondrous new tome on Kiran at least once. With every cast of the spell, she noticed changes in his disposition, no matter how subtle. He would find his gaze magnetically drawn to her from across a room, try to make excuses to extend conversations, and at a couple points even asked her to join him, the Askrans and Cecilia for a meal. Tragically, the Mage General in question wasn't as thrilled about the shift in the status quo as she was – only a blind idiot could've missed how strained her smile had become or how creased her brow looked.
Frankly, Julia was amazed she could even muster the effort to make out Cecilia's troubled features. As Kiran changed, so did she: while he became ever more splendid and perfect in her eyes, everyone else began to fade into the background. One day, she woke up to realize she could no longer pin faces to names without a few seconds of thought. Unless she put in some mental exertion, most other people didn't even seem to have faces anymore. It wasn't particularly hard to see why – she had no reason whatsoever to care about the lives of anyone but her beloved. Their experiences, triumph and defeats were completely meaningless to her. Honestly, they weren't even people so much as they were things – nothing but background objects that happened to fill a world that existed primarily to augment her and Kiran's happiness.
She did still indulge Seliph from time to time, but these days she found it difficult to muster any kind of investment in her brother's affairs. Recently, she had to force herself to waste a whole afternoon with him in the local town to assuage his fears that they were starting to grow distant. Thinking of all the time with Kiran she was missing out on grinded on her nerves, but it was better to lose half a day rather than have to put up with him constantly pushing his nose into her business.
If she was totally honest, she could admit that the note's 'warnings' had been prescient: she had changed exactly as it said she would. But so what? She was happier than she'd ever been and was driven by a passion she'd never felt before. Was she supposed to give that up just so she could waste her time on the random Heroes that Kiran happened to summon? If anything, she was upset it had taken her so long to find that splendid tome and have her eyes opened to what really mattered in life.
At present, she'd already given Kiran his spell dosage for the day and was content to let his growing desire for her swell for a few hours before indulging it. At least, that had been her plan until she suddenly saw Cecilia storming her way. Julia could tell she wasn't the Etruian's target since her attention was unfocused and appeared to be directed inward. When the two passed each other, Cecilia glanced Julia's way and gave her a clear look at the maelstrom of emotion striking the older woman's face. Frustrated tears dripped from bloodshot eyes past quivering lips while stress lines creased every fold of skin from her forehead down to her chin. If Julia was reading her expression correctly, she was marred by a mixture of grief, anger, even resentment…
Whatever it all was, she looked absolutely miserable. She bitterly narrowed her eyes at Julia before turning her head away and stomping away down the hall. In the aftermath, she was surprised for several reasons. For one, she'd never seen Cecilia so distraught – the general had always been so graceful and composed. For another, she appeared to have come from the direction of Kiran's office, implying that the summoner may have been the source of her distress.
Finally, she couldn't believe how thrilled it made her to see Cecilia in such a pathetic state.
When she'd gotten a good look at the pain etched into her expression, Julia nearly shuddered from a bolt of exhilaration shooting down her spine. Cecilia was suffering…and that felt good. Upon thinking about it, she concluded that kind of reaction was only natural. After all, Cecilia had impudently tried to take what was hers. If anything, she wasn't feeling enough dejection for the crime she'd committed. But that will come in time… Julia assured herself, an eager grin sprouting from the lips at the thought of what Cecilia might look like when Kiran abandoned her entirely.
Speaking of…whatever spat those two must've had was doubtless affecting him as well. And it just wouldn't do to let her sweetheart suffer alone, now would it? If Cecilia was going to give her a golden opportunity to tighten her hold on Kiran without even needing her tome, Julia wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth. She promptly began retracing the greenette's steps back towards Kiran's office, her mind already racing at what kind of consolations she could offer.
She was unimpeded in her trek and arrived at her destination after only a handful of minutes. Kiran was probably far enough along that she needn't bother with knocking, but it didn't hurt to be safe – he might even be disappointed she didn't just come in unannounced, which would be a wonderful sign. So, she kept up her veneer of decorum and bothered to give the door a few raps with her knuckled before going in.
She found Kiran hunched over his desk, his hand running through his hair while he shook his head. He was so distracted by his thoughts that he barely registered her presence at first. However, once he realized just who had come to visit him, he did a double take and got a sudden burst of vitality. "J-Julia! Where'd you come from?"
"Oh, I just had a feeling I should stop by." She smiled and glided towards him, elated at the way his breathing sped up as she did so. "And it seems I was right to do so. You look awfully troubled, Kiran. Is everything alright?"
He avoided her gaze and stammered, "Oh, well, it's nothing that won't sort itself out eventually. I'd hate to bore you with–" His words caught in his throat when she reached out to rest her hand on his shoulder. Once he could bring himself to look her in the eye, she widened her smile ever so slightly.
"I could never be bored listening to you, Kiran."
He swallowed and cast his eyes down. After clenching his hand in what she thought was an attempt to steel his nerves, he revealed, "Cecilia and I are…going through a rough time right now. I-I just…" he sighed and cradled his head in one hand, "we don't really connect like we used to, you know? And I can't figure out why! I mean, we're the same people we've always been, so what's happened to us all of the sudden?" He realized he was starting to ramble and took a breath to calm down. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't be saddling you with this. It's our problem, not yours."
It isn't a problem, dear – it's the solution. Verbally, she settled on saying, "Please, don't apologize. I hate to see you upset. If my being here has helped even a little bit, then it was well worth the time."
He managed to give her a weary smile, though she could see in his eyes that he was only expressing a fraction of what he truly felt for her. "Thank you, Julia. That…that means a lot to me." That was what he said, but Julia could tell what he meant was that she meant a lot to him. And since she was so important in his eyes, even if he was still unwilling to admit so out loud, it would've been just heartless to leave him be.
"Of course, Kiran. You mean a lot to me too." She pulled her hand back to give herself the freedom to pull a chair over to his own. He watched her with bated breath, his confusion doubtless nothing but a mask to cover his excitement. "I'll always be here for you, just like how you were there for me." She let her hand lay atop his. "You refused to let me be alone in my time of need, so now I'll return the favor."
"Julia, I-I…" She squeezed his hand with the barest amount of pressure, shut her eyes, and settled her head against his shoulder. In response, he sucked in a lungful of air and went rigid. She could feel how the muscles in his arm tightened to hold it in place, to keep it from instinctively wrapping around her back. She could sense the desire that coursed through his body and instructed him to take what she was offering. She knew he was being enticed by the same temptations she was and wanted nothing more than to feel her bountiful chest pressing into his as their limbs pulled them together as tight as they could.
But, to her chagrin, her work proved to be unfinished when he demonstrated he still had the strength of will to resist her wiles. Still, her disappointment was tempered by the fact that, while he managed to fight the urge to give in to her entirely, she had set down enough roots in his heart that he couldn't bring himself to throw her off. That alone was enough of a sign that her efforts were near fruition.
She purred in delight and slid her fingers across his knuckles, content with the knowledge that her labor of love was almost complete.
A week and a half later, Julia was confident that the fated day had finally arrived. She could feel in her bones that, by sundown, Kiran would be hers in both body and soul. She was returning to her room after her morning drills at the magic range to grab her tome (safely hidden under her pillow as usual) and finish her work once and for all.
When she arrived at her quarters, her attention was drawn to a nondescript piece of stationary folded on the middle of her bed. Confused, she set the Book of Naga down on her dresser and picked up the unusual piece of paper. She unfurled it and read the two lines written within.
I know of the crimes you've committed.
Meet me at the clearing ten minutes' walk into the Metsä Forest, directly west of the pegasus stables.
She blankly stared at the minimalist page, her hands shaking and mouth dry. This couldn't be real…not now, not when she was so close! She couldn't even tell who'd written the damn thing – the script was deliberately blocky so as to avoid being recognizable. It doesn't matter who wrote this. She told herself and tried to gather her bearings. They think they can take my Kiran away from me? She bared her teeth and crumpled the paper in her fist. Then I'll answer their challenge and show them just how wrong they are…
It seemed Julia wouldn't be switching tomes after all; she swiped the Book of Naga back from the top of her dresser and was comforted by the familiar rush of power that shot through her veins. Whoever wrote that message had no idea whom they were dealing with, but she would be more than happy to show them. She'd killed Julius singlehandedly even when he had the full might of Loptous at his beck and call – whatever self-righteous peon this was that thought they could stop her would be child's play by comparison.
She started by using a flash of Naga's power to disintegrate the note that was still clenched in her hand. Without wasting a second, she stormed towards the destination outlined in the letter. She passed a few bodies on the way that probably shot confused looks at her, but she barely noticed their existence. She didn't dare waste a single thought on anything but stopping the last threat to her beloved's heart.
She went due west from the stables into Metsä Forest, carefully counting the time in her head to make sure she didn't overshoot the clearing in question. After almost ten minutes exactly, she reached what she figured had to be the designated meeting spot. At a glance, nobody was there, which prompted Julia to investigate the area with the Book of Naga open to the most powerful spell she could muster.
When her search turned up nothing, she wasn't sure what to feel. On the one hand, that meant there wasn't an ambush of some sort waiting for her. On the other hand, her time was being wasted – she could've already finished with Kiran if this stupid affair hadn't delayed her! She decided to wait it out a little longer, if only for the chance to eliminate this thorn in her side before it became a real problem. As a cautionary measure, she slid the Book of Naga into her sleeve just like how she had with her love tome, ensuring whoever appeared wouldn't see an attack coming.
Even with all her preparation, she was still startled by the sound of crunching leaves behind her. With a lethal burst of magic twitching at her fingertips, she turned around to see who had the audacity to confront her. Against all odds, the sight before her managed to get her to drop her hostile intent and sigh in relief.
"Lord Brother!" She gasped, comforted by the familiar face that stepped forward. "Oh, thank goodness! I was terribly worried you would be someone else. You have no idea how happy I am to see it's just you."
Julia's words had been delivered with a suitably welcoming smile that, to her confusion, was not reciprocated by her half-brother. Instead, he averted his gaze and chewed his lip while drumming his fingers along the pommel of Tyrfing in an undeniable expression of consternation. "…Julia," he began once he found the courage to meet her eyes, "I've called you here for a reason. I have…" his free hand clenched as he struggled to find words, "…suspicions about you that I deeply, desperately pray aren't true."
"Suspicions?" She parroted with false innocence, once more cognizant of the fact that she was only there because of an accusing letter that swore to know of her 'crimes'.
"Julia, I…" He lost his voice again and swiveled his head from side to side, in what could've been an attempt to either delay the inevitable or search for the right thing to say. Eventually, he heaved a weary, troubled sigh and managed to catch her gaze again. "I will be blunt, so as to spare us both unnecessary anguish." His expression steeled from its prior uncertainty.
"Have you been magically forcing Kiran to fall in love with you?"
He knows. She realized with wide eyes as her heart stopped beating for a second. Forget suspicions – he'd hit the nail right on the head with a single accusation. He know he knows he knows he knows heknowsheknowsheknows-
At the lack of any rebuttal from her, Seliph visibly became seized by a myriad of negative emotions: grief, disappointment, denial, betrayal… "Julia, please," he implored, his voice warbling from nascent tears, "tell me I'm wrong! I beg of you, tell me I'm crazy for even thinking this, that it's absurd to even consider that you could be capable of such a thing! Please, don't let there be a single kernel of truth to what I'm saying!"
"I-I…I…" She stammered out, still at a loss for what to do now that Seliph had cornered her.
Apparently, that was as good as an outright confession for Seliph. "Oh, Julia…" He shook his head, her name slipping from his lips as if she were a departed loved one. When his head stilled once more, she was able to see the bitter tears that leaked from his eyes. "Why?! Why would ever do something so horrible?! How could you ever do something so depraved?! You know full well what foul machinations brought your parents together! How could you stomach following in the footsteps of a plan that brought so much suffering to Jugdral?!"
Seliph probably thought that would stir guilt and shame in her that would soon lead to an attempt at repentance. But it had the opposite effect: being reminded of her initial motivations only strengthened her resolve against the initial shock his confrontation had produced. "Because I love him! And my parents loved each other! It doesn't matter how people come to love each other – once they do, everything's fine so long as they're happy together! If it was 'horrible' and 'depraved' for my parents to be together, does that mean I'm horrible and depraved for being the result of their love?" She seized on the guilty flinch he gave and glared at him even more fiercely. "Is that how you've always seen me? As some mistake that should never have been born?"
"NO!" He refuted, his hand pressed against his heart. "Julia, I have never blamed you for the sins of your father! Despite all the ill will I've felt for Arvis, I would never be so cruel as to hate you for something you had no control over. I can even recognize that Julius, for all his crimes, was just another victim in Manfroy's schemes."
He got off the defensive backfoot and began another verbal attack. "But this isn't some circumstance you happened to be born into! Julia, Kiran had been in a relationship with Lady Cecilia for nearly a year by the time you arrived! I watched them fall in love and I've seen how deeply they care for one another! I've seen the festivals they've attended together, the ballroom dances they've shared, the gestures of intimacy they exchange when they think no one is looking. And you would destroy all of that out of a purely selfish desire to have Kiran for yourself! How can you not see the evil in what you're doing?!"
"I thought you said you wanted me to be happy!" She accused, hoping to reignite his earlier guilt. "You said you wanted whatever made me happy to endure! Was that just another empty lie to make yourself sound better?"
Unfortunately, her indictment had little effect. "I do want you to be happy, Julia, but not if that happiness comes at the cost of tearing down someone else's! Do you not think that Kiran's love for Cecilia has made her happy and vice versa?"
"B-but I love him too!" She insisted in a frantic effort to make Seliph see things her way. "More than Cecilia ever could! However happy he was with her, he'd be happier with me!"
"Julia…" he sighed her name and once again gave his head a fatigued shake. "Even if that were true, and I don't believe for a second that it is, that would be Kiran's decision to make! You can't force him to love you! Have you spared even a second of thought for how either him or Cecilia would feel if your machinations succeeded? Because even now, close to fruition as they are, I've been able to see the heartache the two of them endure trying to maintain a relationship that Kiran doesn't seem to have any enthusiasm for anymore. She feels abandoned, he feels guilty, and they're both miserable!"
"T-then that just means he needs me!" She concluded even as Seliph continued to shake his head yet again. "Most of the damage is already done, right? So what's the harm in going all the way so I can be there for him?"
"No, Julia." He calmly refuted, now more disappointed than furious. "You have to make things right, and there's only one way to do that: you must own up to what you've done and undo the pain you've caused."
"Y-you mean…" She stammered, terrified at the mere thought of what he was suggesting. "Confess what I've been doing…? B-but Kiran will hate me if I tell him that!"
Unlike the countless times she became scared during the holy war, there were no condolences from Seliph to soothe her fears this time. "Yes, I don't doubt he will. In fact, you will almost certainly become a pariah – so much so that consider it very likely you will be expelled from the Order. But that is the price that must sometimes be paid to do the right thing." His voice took on a familiar jaded edge that she recognized to be because he was speaking from the experience of his lineage. "Even if you are despised for it, you must still dedicate yourself to acting virtuously. Especially if you are doing so to make amends for past sins."
"I-I don't…I mean, w-what's the point? If you've caught wind, then surely others have as well! Meaning Kiran must already despise me…"
"I obviously cannot say for sure that nobody else has deduced what I have," he said as he began walking towards her, "but I will attest that I only suspected you because my father, and more specifically his fate, is ever in my thoughts. At the time, I saw it as an awful thing to think – that I would see you ecstatic around Kiran while his relationship with Cecilia fell to shambles and contemplate foul play – but I have clearly been vindicated. And I would consider it to be something of a dark blessing that I alone have seen the truth."
He reached out and rested his hands on her shoulders. "Because that means you have the chance to admit your mistakes yourself. I may be forcing your hand, but there is something to be said about the importance of letting the truth be known from your own lips. I have stayed my tongue thus far, so you still have the opportunity to be the one who takes the first step in healing this pain you've wrought."
"Oh, Lord Brother…" She sniffled and leaned forward into his embrace, a few fresh teardrops staining his tunic in the process. "I'm so sorry! I j-just – I love him and I didn't know what else to do! Now he and e-everyone else will all hate me, just like you do!"
"I don't hate you, Julia." He assured her as he wrapped his arms around her back. "I am angry, and terribly disappointed, but I could never bring myself to hate you. I will not defend what you've done, but I will be there to help support you when you confess your guilt. It will hurt to pay penance, yes, but I will not let you pay it alone."
As he tightened his hold on her, Julia thought back to that day Lewyn found her, helpless and amnesiac, and brought her before Seliph. Ever since that moment they met, Seliph had always been at her side. He'd defended her, both on and off the battlefield, acted as a comforting shoulder to cry on in troubling times, and made sure she had the strength to endure whatever came their way. Even if she no longer valued him as much as she once had, she knew beyond any doubt how deeply Seliph cared for her and wanted to make sure she took the right path in life.
Above all else, she knew that Seliph trusted her.
"Nngh-! Julia, you-!"
Just as Sigurd had trusted Arvis.
"I really am sorry about this, Lord Brother." She said, her words perfectly stable and her eyes dry even as golden light from the Book of Naga pierced his sternum. She pulled her head back to meet his shocked expression with a gentle smile. "But I love Kiran too much to let him go when we're this close to being together. Thank you for not telling anyone anything – I'll be careful to make sure nobody else has reason to suspect me."
"Julia," he gasped, his voice weak on account of all the blood filling his lungs that now started to dribble out of his mouth, "h-how could you?!" He gripped the handle of Tyrfing, but she wasn't worried – even if he had the strength to draw his blade, she knew he'd never have it in him to strike her down.
For once, she was the one who shook her head. "Why did you have to make such a fuss, Seliph? You could've just been happy for me like a good brother would. I don't want to kill you, but what else am I supposed to do when you threatened to take Kiran away from me? Don't worry," she patted his chest, staining her hand red in the process, "I'll make sure everyone remembers you fondly. I'll even say a few words about how wonderful you were at Kiran and I's wedding. And don't fret about your Jugdral – I'm sure the Julia there will rule it well."
"Ju…lia…" He managed to choke out. From the corner of her vision, she could see him begin to pull Tyrfing from its sheathe. Amazing. She mentally praised, her internal tone torn between sincerity and snide derision. Even though it's over, you're still trying. Can't you tell when you've lost, Seliph? Was your father this stubborn when mine burned him to a crisp? For however much Julia could respect Seliph's dogged spirit, she wasn't about to take any chances. Not when she was so close.
"Shh…" She hushed him as another beam of sacred light emerged from her tome to stab through his sword arm. "It'll all be over soon. Just relax and drift away into the darkness."
He didn't say anything in response. Whether it was the blood gurgling in his throat or the severity of his wound robbing him of his last ounces of strength, something made him unable to do anything but wheeze as he began slumping towards the ground. While he fell, he somehow found the power to keep his gaze locked with hers, ensuring she had a full view of the distraught, horrified betrayal in his eyes during his final moments. Once he collapsed onto the dirt entirely, even that faded away, leaving nothing but the hollow emptiness of a fresh corpse.
Now that she stood there alone in the woods, Julia found that her earlier assurances had ultimately been a lie – she didn't feel sorry about killing Seliph in the slightest. In fact, looking at his carcass, she was suddenly unable to remember why she'd ever cared about him at all. After a few moments of thought, she finally realized what had changed: in her eyes, he wasn't a person. Not anymore, anyways. The second he'd tried to undo her labor of love, he stopped being her brother and just became another thing – an obstacle for her to overcome so she could be with Kiran.
Kiran… The thought of her beloved pulled a dreamy sigh from her lips. Though she was alone, she instinctively raised the Book of Naga to cover the blush and bashful smile that adorned her face. Once she realized the true meaning of removing what appeared to be the last hurdle between her and her sweetheart, she began to uncontrollably giggle.
"Ehe."
Killing Seliph didn't just eliminate the final hitch in her plan to be with her soulmate – it also proved the strength of her love beyond any doubt.
"Ehehehe…"
Any random harlot could've used that tome to win Kiran's heart, but how many would've had the guts to murder their own flesh and blood when they got in the way?
"Ehehehe!"
Not a one of them. But Julia did. She wasn't afraid to do whatever she had to in order to make Kiran hers. Arvis or Deirdre could've been the one to confront her and she'd have killed them just as easily.
"Ehehe! I did it! Ehehehe~!"
Because she loved Kiran more than anything else in the world.
Once she'd finished changing in her room, Julia began practically skipping towards Kiran's office, her precious lover's tome once again clutched in her hand. The front of her dress had gotten stained with Seliph's filthy blood on account of how close they were when she disposed of him, so she'd torn off the offending fabric and used her long sleeves to cover the exposed part of her chest as she made her way back to the castle. She'd disintegrated both the stained silk and Seliph's corpse in the searing light of the Book of Naga, ensuring there was no evidence of what she'd done. True, there was still Tyrfing, but whoever stumbled onto it would find no remnant of its wielder, so there was no risk of it being traced back to her. Especially since the light drizzle that started soon after she'd returned would wash away any vestiges of her scent that a laguz might've picked up.
She didn't bother knocking on Kiran's door – she needed to see him and he'd be elated to see her, so there was no point indulging in any delays, minor or otherwise. He glanced up from his desk, and the initial surge of adoration on his face sent a bolt of euphoria down her spine. That adoration soon gave way to a flash of guilt – it seemed that some last corner of his heart was still clinging to Cecilia.
Don't worry, love. She thought as she ran her fingers along the pages of the tome she'd, as always, slipped into her sleeve. I'll make sure she never means anything to you ever again… She cast what she hoped would be the final use of her magnificent tome and widened her smile when she saw him begin to unconsciously lean towards her.
"Julia…" He breathed, unable to help himself from reaching out to her.
"Kiran…" She sighed, equally as helpless to the all-consuming desire she felt for the man before her. They reached each other and became wrapped in a loving embrace. With his arms around her, she felt so warm and comfortable and safe that she could've spent her whole life like that and died happy. She leaned into his neck, deeply inhaled, and soon felt lightheaded from his delightful aroma.
Much to her displeasure, the dream shattered when she felt him go rigid against her. Her jubilant smile curled down into a disappointed frown when he pulled away to rest his hands on her shoulders. "Julia, I'm sorry, but I…I can't do this." He sounded agonized to even think those words, let alone say them, so she got the feeling his hesitation wasn't because of lingering feelings for Cecilia.
Still, she didn't know what else could possibly be holding him back. "Because of Cecilia?"
He winced and looked away from her. "…In a sense, yes."
Oh, come on… She pouted, annoyed that she was still being kept from her true love. What, was she going to have to kill Cecilia too before Kiran would finally get over his hang-ups?
"But it's not because I'm still attracted to her! I mean, I'll always care about her, but that's not the same as loving her. Julia, you're the one I love." For a few seconds, her whole mind went blank. Words failed to describe the otherworldly bliss that coursed through her body at hearing those words from him. Thankfully, that time she lost her grip on the world coincided with time Kiran spent struggling to find words, so she returned her focus to him just as he started talking again.
"Or at least, you're the one I love right now…" He sighed and looked at her with pure remorse. "I thought I loved Cecilia too…and then you came along, and I fell completely head over heels for you. I love you, but…what if the same thing happens twice? What if I fall out of love with you, just like I did with Cecilia?" Though he tried to contain them, guilty tears began to drip from his eyes. "You deserve better than that. You deserve better than a shameless jerk like me who can't stay faithful to save his life…"
He's holding back…because he doesn't want to hurt me? The idea sounded alien to her, but as she mulled it over in her mind, she came to see the logic behind his reasoning. But rather than become dissuaded as he had, she felt her love for him grow further still. Oh, he's the sweetest, most perfect man in the world! How many men would put themselves through the agony of rejection for the well-being of their beloved?
In the face of his own self-deprecation, he had slumped back into his chair and begun cradling his head in his hand. She wasn't about to leave him alone when it was clear he now loved her as much as she loved him, so she strode forward and sat herself across his lap before he could stop her.
He was surprised to see her still trying to be intimate with him, but quickly composed himself. "Julia, I can't–"
"Yes, you can." She interrupted and glided her hand down his cheek. "I trust you, even if you don't trust yourself. I know you'll always be with me, come what may."
"You can't know that…"
"But I can. You and Cecilia may have been attracted to each other…but this?" She cupped his cheeks in her hands and forced his beautiful brown orbs to lock with hers. "This is true love. I have faith that you'll never leave my side, so that I…can never leave yours."
She could see the apprehension fade from his eyes and become replaced with unmatched ardor. "Oh, Julia…" Her name was all he needed to say – without another word, he began to cradle her face and lean forward. She mirrored his action whilst also pulling him towards her. She could hear her heart pounding in her ears and feel her lips moisten with anticipation.
Then, the second before they were joined together in heavenly ecstasy, they were distracted by the sound of footsteps that soon led to the door opening. It swung open to reveal Cecilia, a bouquet of roses clutched in her hands. "Kiran, I know this is sudden, but would you like to–" Her words, which began with a cautious optimism, caught in her throat when she took in the sight before her. The poor woman looked like she'd just seen a family member suddenly die – the stunned lack of comprehension on her face was similar enough. She looked first at Kiran as if she couldn't recognize who he was and then drifted her gaze to gape at Julia.
The second their eyes met, Julia knew exactly what to do. Her lips curled into a twisted smile that anyone with the right familiarity would've described as identical to one of Julius' mocking sneers. Without breaking the line of sight between her and Cecilia, Julia tilted Kiran's head back towards her and finally closed the distance between them. Their lips pressed together, neither of them able to resist the wanton moans that leaked from their throats. Her eyes initially shut from the unbridled ecstasy of tasting Kiran's mouth, but she cracked one back open upon hearing a distraught gasp from their unwelcome voyeur.
Julia greedily drank in the sight of Cecilia's anguished, aghast tears leaking down her cheeks and her bouquet abandoned on the ground. That's right, Cecilia, she taunted in her thoughts, Kiran is mine. She decided to twist the knife further and extended her tongue to lick at Kiran's lips. Naturally, he was unable to resist her, and obediently opened his mouth to give her access. She took great pleasure in watching Cecilia flinch back as if Julia had reached across the room to strike her while their tongues entwined.
At last, she could stand the sight of her defeat no longer and fled the room with her hand covering her eyes in a futile attempt to stop the tide of tears that was streaming forth. Once she was gone, they still indulged in another minute of wrestling their tongues before Julia pulled back. Once they separated, she swallowed the spit she'd stolen from Kiran's mouth and involuntarily shuddered from the sheer rapture of having a piece of him inside her.
After he'd had a few moments to get his bearings, Kiran realized for whom they just put on a show. "Julia, w-what did we just do?!" He asked, appalled with himself. "Cecilia didn't deserve that! Even ignoring how awful it was to do that to her, it'll kill morale when she tells people what she saw!" He made to rise from his chair, but she didn't let him – she stayed put on his lap and gently pushed him back. "Julia, come on!" He protested. "Let me up!"
"It's fine." She assured him as she rubbed her hand into his chest. "She was going to find out about us sooner or later; I just ripped off the bandage to get it over with. The faster people learn to accept our love, the better. And if they never do?" She giggled and gave him a peck on the lips. "Then they're not worth thinking about anyway."
"B-but," he sputtered, his protests already weaker after that brief kiss, "that was such a horrible way to reveal it…"
"Horrible…?" She repeated as if she'd never heard the word before. "What's so horrible about our love? Because that's all that was: us expressing our love. If she'd shown up a few seconds later, it would've been the same thing. Why should we feel guilty about showing how much we love each other?"
He looked like he was going to make another objection, but she gripped his chin and tilted his head ever so slightly so that he was gazing into her violet pupils. "I-I…" She softly smiled and leaned forward to suck on his lips for a few more seconds. Once she pulled back, she could tell he'd lost any will to keep fighting her. "…You're right. There's nothing wrong with what we feel for each other. If people can't accept that, that's their problem."
"Exactly." She concurred. "And since we have your office to ourselves now," her voice grew husky and she drifted closer with the tip of her tongue extended, "let's keep expressing our love…"
Their mouths met once again in a mutual blaze of passion. Somewhere amidst the euphoric haze that ensnared her mind, Julia's thoughts drifted to when she first fell for Kiran. Back then, she'd been so timid about her feelings that using magic to steer his heart towards her was the only approach she felt comfortable with. But with every use of her tome, she'd grown more confident and assured of herself. She began to understand more and more how vital it was that she win Kiran's love no matter what – regardless of who or what stood in her way.
And now?
She'd effortlessly cut down her once beloved brother the second he tried to stop her and sent that whore running in tears without so much as a word. So what if people disapproved? All anyone knew that they could shame her for was her treatment of Cecilia, and she couldn't have cared less about that. As far as she was concerned, only one thing in her life mattered:
Kiran was finally hers, now and forever.
It's always the quiet ones, isn't it? Methinks this Julia might have a little Manfroy/Loptous lingering in her system that the Breidablik accidentally stimulated. Or maybe murdering Seliph just caused a very small, very important little thread in her psyche to snap like a twig. Or maybe dark magic isn't a toy and repeatedly using a tome that warns about side effects is bound to have negative consequences on your psyche. Or maybe it was some combination of all three! In any case, the way I see it, someone had to devolve into a fit of insane laughter sooner or later, and I figured it might as well be her.
Actually, we don't see all that much of Julia once she completely goes off the deep end. She clearly pulled a 180 from how she was at the start and started nurturing a sadistic streak right away, but fully yandere Julia is only there for about one scene. It almost makes you wonder what cruel, depraved things she might do if Cecilia had stood her ground and exposed Julia right when she finally had Kiran in her grasp…
Julia was a Brainwashing Type, meaning she tries to win her beloved's heart by controlling his mind to force him to love her. If he's already got a girlfriend, too bad for that bitch. The great irony is, of course, that Arvis pulled a similar stunt with Deirdre. Though, if memory serves, he more took advantage of Manfroy-induced amnesia that removed Sigurd from the equation than forced Deirdre to love him over the blue man. So Julia's actually worse than her dad. Still, I think it's similar enough that her opening quote could've been "like father, like daughter". But I think the given line from our good pal Joseph Goebbels fits too well to pass up. Julia's followed the advice of such a great role model, hasn't she?
Please leave comments, good or bad, since your feedback is how I learn. Thank you for reading.