Emma sat down on the rough wooden slats of the dock, yanking off her shoes and socks before dipping her bare feet into the water. She couldn't quite place when the docks had become her go-to place for de-stressing, but sitting there and feeling the cool water between her toes was calming to no end. The stars in the sky were glinting merrily, reflected in the mostly-still water as a small breeze played with the ends of her hair, and the thoughts whirling in her head finally quieted.

The sound of footsteps from behind startled her and she twisted to look behind her. The sound came from the approach of three figures - or, rather, the sound came from two people approaching, while a third, far more silent, person accompanied them - all of which were easily recognizable. She sighed, twisting back around and closing her eyes, listening as they came closer.

The tail end of a conversation floated over, and she just barely caught the end of Killian's sentence. "...she wants me to go, I'll go, but I'm coming along, mate."

A growl from David was interrupted by Mary Margaret's quiet, placating reply. "Let it go. You two fighting is the last thing we need right now."

Emma sighed and slid over, stopping when she sat right against the left corner of the dock. She twisted and leaned against one of the columns there, keeping her feet in the water as she looked back at the others, subconsciously noting their positions. Her parents had stopped directly behind her; David was crouching beside her, while Snow stood beside him, baby Neal still in her arms. For once, neither were smiling, and concern - rather than happiness or hope - dominated their faces, but the rest of their behavior was normal.

Killian, on the other hand, stood even further behind them, leaning against the dock railing about five feet away. At a glance, his posture held his normal nonchalance, but she'd spent far too long behind walls of her own to be fooled by that. Instead, several minor things caught her attention - he was standing as far away as he could get while still being within earshot, staying silent to avoid drawing attention, the very slight tension in his stance suggesting that he was physically holding himself back from approaching - but it was his eyes that caught her attention the most. As flat as most of his features were, his eyes held a combination of concern and hesitancy, and she recognized that look all too well; she'd had it herself whenever she found herself at a new school or foster home as she'd asked herself how close she could get without being sent away. She winced as she recognized it in his eyes, turning to look at her parents so that she didn't have to look anymore, didn't have to see the damage her walls wrought on other people, didn't have to see her own hunted eyes in his face.

"Hey." Emma tried to fake a smile, but she didn't think that it was very convincing.

"Hi." Mary Margaret was quiet when she finally spoke, her words spoken gently above the lapping of waves on the dock. "I'm not going to ask how you are, because I know that you're not okay. If nothing else, you're beating yourself up about bringing Marian back. But you need to know that you were trying to do the right thing. You saved her life and, even if Regina can't see that, we can. Robin can. Marian can."

Emma nodded once, turning out to look at the ocean again. She bit back a snarky response - something along the lines of how she was surprised Snow White hadn't started a hope speech yet - and nodded again. "Yeah." She knew her response was noncommittal, but it was the best she could handle.

"Things will get better, Emma." Emma sighed lightly; she shouldn't be surprised - she was just remarking on the lack of hope speech - but she still allowed herself the silent gesture of annoyance. "I know you don't have faith the way we do, but you have to believe that. Things work out the way they're supposed to, and, as long as you have faith in that, you can't go wrong. You're the Savior, Emma. Do you know what that means?" She didn't wait for Emma to answer, barrelling on instead. "You save people. You're a protector. And even if you don't believe that, we-" At this, she gestured to herself and to David, a growing smile on her face. "do. We have faith in you, and that is how we know that everything will work out fine."

Emma couldn't take it anymore. She stood in one fluid motion, startling Mary Margaret at the suddenness of the motion. "How?" She knew she was almost yelling, her voice harsh in the quiet air, but she didn't bother to lower her voice. "How can you be certain that it'll all work out?"

"Because we have faith, Emma! Because it's never failed us yet!"

"How has it not? Where was your faith when the Evil Queen wanted you dead for years, when you were living as a bandit? What did your faith do for you when she cast a curse that kept you trapped for 28 years? What good was relying on faith in Neverland? With Zelena?"

Snow's voice had risen to match Emma's, sounding slightly strident in the air. "It meant everything, Emma! Even after all of that, we found you! We got Henry back! Zelena's gone! And we never gave up!"

"Yes, but look at what we lost in the process! We lost 28 years - I lost my parents and you lost your daughter - because of Regina's curse, another year because of Pan's curse, Neal… How can you dismiss all of the bad stuff?"

Mary Margaret's face fell as Emma reached the end of her spiel, but she didn't back down. "I'm not trying to say that what we've lost is unimportant. I'm saying that loss defines us. We can't control everything that happens to us, but we can control how we react. Yes, we've lost a lot, but we've done our best to rise above it and we're happy now, and our faith had everything to do with it!"

"I'm sorry, but I don't accept that. Having blind faith that everything is just going to work out well doesn't get you anywhere! Maybe things have worked out for you, maybe having faith is all you needed, and I'm happy for you. I really am. I'm glad you never had to experience what I did, what Neal did, what Regina and Killian did." She flung out her hand in his direction, noticing as he looked down, his hand in the process of scratching his ear as, she'd noticed, he was wont to do when he was uncomfortable. She continued speaking; she'd address that later. "Things don't just get better all on their own. I know what it's like to have faith and to have it thrown in your face again and again. I know what it is to lose hope."

Mary Margaret's smile turned sad, the way it always did when she felt bad for someone else. "I'm sure that losing Neal is horrible; I can't imagine what you must be feeling right now. To lose your True Love, especially after just finding him again…"

Emma didn't miss the way Killian winced at the words, looking away again. He shuffled slightly, the brief sound of rustling leather the only indication that he'd moved at all, and looked out at the sea, but he didn't say a word. His hand moved from his ear to his face, passing it once over his features before dropping it, returning to his statue-like stillness.

Emma took in the movement in the seconds it took her mother to finish speaking, interrupting as soon as she began to trail off and search for words. "Stop! He wasn't my True Love!" Snow looked over at her, confusion written across her stricken face. "He was my first love, but I'm pretty certain he wasn't my True Love. And yes, I loved him." She glanced over at Killian, surprised to see him remain unaffected by her admission of love, but she hurried on before analyzing that. "But I wasn't in love with him."

"What do you mean?" Snow looked slightly aghast, the confusion from earlier only deepening.

Emma took a deep breath, swallowing heavily to steady her nerves. "I haven't told you what happened between Neal and me or how I ended up having Henry in jail, but I think it's time." She stared out at the water, still standing as she returned to watching the stars twinkling merrily in the heavens. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a brief flash of motion as Killian looked over, his attention now completely devoted on her, but she didn't acknowledge it. She probably wouldn't be able to continue if she did.

"I met Neal when I was 16. I was stealing my Bug; he was lying in the backseat after having stolen it himself, and we started to hang out together. We ran a series of cons together, stealing from convenience stores and similar places to make our way to Tallahassee, until he tells me that he stole some watches that got his face plastered on wanted posters and he can't get to them to fence them. I said I'd go." Emma knew that her voice was thick at this point and she could feel tears just waiting to spill from her eyes. She ignored all of it, pushing forward. "When I get to the locker, the cops are waiting for me. Turns out August - Pinocchio - approached Neal and told him about the curse. Said that I had to be left alone to 'fulfill my destiny'. Neal called in a tip that told the cops where I was. I didn't know I was pregnant at the time, but that's why Henry was born in jail. Why I gave him up." Emma swallowed thickly, still not looking at the others. "So, no, I wasn't in love with him. And he wasn't my True Love. He was the father of my son and the man who saved us all, but he was nothing more."

Emma finally worked up the courage to turn around again, taking in their expressions one by one. Killian - she was absolutely not going to think about why she looked at him first - still looked nonchalant, but his jaw was clenched far too tightly to be normal. David's expression was less shuttered, but it held an equal amount of anger; his jaw was similarly clenched, eyes steely beneath a furrowed brow. Snow's expression, on the other hand, was one of shock - which she expected - and something that looked a lot like guilt - which she hadn't.

"Oh, Emma…" Snow stopped, her mouth opening and closing several times before shutting with a click, at a loss for words. The silence was all-encompassing, the only sound coming from the waves still lapping at the dock. All at once, a look of horror descended across her face, and she looked down at the baby still clutched in her arms. Again she opened her mouth, but, once again, no words came.

Emma smiled, understanding the thoughts passing through her mother's head. "As I said, I may not have been in love with Neal, but I loved him. If nothing else, he gave me Henry and died to save all of us. I can think of no name more fitting for my brother."

A relieved smile passed across Snow's face, but it faded quickly and she didn't speak. Instead, David stood, finally rising from the crouched position he'd taken when they'd first arrived and pulling Emma close. When he spoke, his voice was rougher than normal, but she couldn't tell if it stemmed from sadness or fury. "I'm sorry." The sentiment was simple and the words few, but she heard every bit of what he was saying. It's okay. I understand. I'm sorry for what happened to you. I'm sorry that I (we) pushed you towards Neal. We trust you. Everything's going to be okay.

Mary Margaret stepped closer shortly thereafter, putting the arm not supporting Neal around the both of them, squeezing gently. Emma smiled into their shoulders, her vision blurring as she finally allowed the tears to fall quietly. From there, she watched as Killian shifted, walking further down the dock on silent feet, stopping at the far end of the dock. She recognized the motion for what it was - giving them some space to talk or hug or cry in private - but she still rolled her eyes at the rather antiquated notion.

They separated, finally, tear tracks visible on all three faces, when Neal started to cry. Emma let out a teary laugh. "Looks like he wanted to know what all the fuss was about." David walked over to his wife, leaning over her to toy with the baby until he calmed slightly, and Emma smiled at the domestic scene before her. "Hey, it's late. I'm going to stay and walk for a bit - clear my head and all that - but you should go back to the loft and get some sleep. A lot has happened, and I'm sure you're tired." She smiled at the hesitancy in their faces. "Trust me, I'm fine. Everything's good."

"Okay… If you're sure…" Emma could still hear the uncertainty in her mother's tone, but they turned to walk away.

She stayed where she was for a moment, then called out to them again. "Wait!" She walked forward, meeting them towards the middle of the dock. "I know we disagree on how much you can rely on faith, and I still don't think that faith is all you need to get by, but I don't think you're completely wrong either. Sometimes believing in yourself is what it takes, and that's the kind of faith I understand."

Snow smiled what might have been the first genuine smile she'd given since the conversation began. "You know, you might be right about that. Good night, Emma, and thank you for trusting us with... all that."

Emma nodded at the same time as David gave his own goodbye. "Good night, Emma. See you tomorrow." With that, they walked away, Neal clutched safe in his mother's embrace, David's arm wrapped around the both of them.

As soon as they were gone, Emma looked over at Killian, tilting her head in what she hoped was an unmistakable sign that he should follow her before walking back to the end of the dock. She sat, putting her feet back into the water with a sigh. Within seconds he was standing beside her, easing himself down to the dock and proffering his flask.

She smiled. "Rum really is your solution to everything, isn't it?"

He laughed slightly, uncorking it and taking a swig. "Well, I still haven't found a situation where it hurts."

She reached for it, taking a sip of her own before handing it back. "You remember when you asked who I was in Neverland?"

"Aye." He raised an eyebrow, settling back against the wood until he could face her comfortably.

"To see the map, I had to admit that I felt like an orphan. Growing up, I spent time in various orphanages - some more pleasant than others - and then the whole thing with Neal happened. I guess I've never really gotten over that." She couldn't help being a little surprised at just how much she was willing to share. Maybe it was the events of the day, the stress catching up to her, but she found herself sharing details she normally kept secret. She couldn't bring herself to care much, though, so she continued, mumbling slightly. "That's why I could hear the Lost Boys."

She looked over at him, not entirely sure what she expected to see. He had one knee crooked, resting his good arm against it, rum still clenched in his hand, while his other leg was out straight. He was looking straight at her, blue eyes boring straight through her, and she once again found herself feeling as though he were looking straight at her soul. He turned his head then, looking out at the ocean - she'd found that he did that whenever he was about to broach a particularly sensitive subject - and licked his lips.

A shaky breath later, he was speaking. "Do you recall how I told you on the beanstalk that I recognized a look in your eyes? That of someone left alone? Abandoned?"

"Yes."

"I told you that I recognized it from my encounters with the Lost Boys and, while that isn't, strictly speaking, false, I would have recognized that look long before I even set foot in Neverland. I've seen it in the mirror often enough." He swallowed, passing his tongue over his lips again, his hand twitching towards his ear but staying anchored to his knee. "My mother died when I was young. I don't particularly remember the circumstances; it was too long ago. Afterwards, my elder brother, Liam, and I lived with our father. He'd find berths for us on ships, so we moved around a lot. Looking back, I'd wager he cheated his way onto those ships and stole what food we did eat." He closed his eyes, then breathing in deeply and allowing his head to fall back against the post, taking another swig of his rum. "We woke up one day to find him gone; he'd set sail during the night, sold us to the captain in return for a ship to escape soldiers coming to arrest him."

Emma had sworn she'd stay quiet, but she couldn't help but interrupt, her indignance getting the better of her. "Hang on, sold?"

Killian winced, eyes still closed. "Aye."

She inhaled through her teeth, the sound sharp in the night. "I'm sorry." She fell silent, thinking back to every time she'd complained about her own parents giving her up. As unfair as it was that her parents gave her up, at least her parents hadn't had much of a choice. "How'd you become a pirate?"

"Ah, right… that." He straightened, his eyes opening again as he looked down at his rum. "Well, our captain decided to steer straight into a storm in search of a crystal the king sought. The ship was capsized and our crew died - all save Liam and myself - but we had found the crystal. In return, the king granted us positions in the Royal Navy, on board the Jewel of the Realm." He stopped, his lips curling into a genuine smile. "Of course, you knew her as the Jolly Roger." Emma nodded, her mind still catching on the "knew". Past tense. Because he traded his ship for her. His smile turned bitter and he raised his flask. "Would you believe that I banned rum? Threw it overboard whenever I saw it."

She smirked at that, taking the flask from him. "You? Banned rum? Don't believe it." She took a drink, passing it back.

"Yes, well… I'd seen what it could do to sailors who abused it. It didn't belong on a military vessel." His tone held an edge that suggested the statement was far more personal than the mere words suggested, but she stayed silent, not pushing any further. "Anyway, the king told us of a medicinal plant in a new realm." He met her eyes before continuing. "A plant… called Dreamshade."

Emma couldn't stop the gasp that spilled from her lips. "Wait, as in… Neverland Dreamshade? The… poison?"

He tilted his head forward, a rueful nod. "Aye. We sailed to the realm on the Jewel and Liam and I went ashore in search of that cursed plant. Pan issued us a warning that the plant was a poison, and I suggested we listen, or, at least, hesitate and consider our decision more carefully; using poison against the kingdom's enemies is bad form no matter how you look at it. But my brother - stubborn arse that he was - refused to budge and he put his faith in the king."

Emma found herself literally leaning forward, her hands on her knees as she bent closer. "David told me your brother died of Dreamshade, but he didn't mention the rest of this… What happened?"

"Aye, that's because David didn't know. I didn't tell him most of this." He sniffed once, raising his flask for a drink, but dropping it again before he took one. "Well, Liam took a clipping of Dreamshade and scraped his arm with it, determined to prove me wrong and Pan a liar." He looked back out at the ocean, his eyes pained. "He collapsed moments later. Pan, demon that he was, showed up and gave us - gave me - hope. He pointed us to the spring that I used to save your father, giving me a rather cryptic warning that all magic came with a price. He neglected to mention that Liam couldn't leave the island again." He looked down at his flask, taking another swig. "He collapsed the second the ship returned to our realm. He was dead within seconds. We buried him at sea within the hour. I was second-in-command, so I became captain. I burned the sail that allowed us to travel to Neverland and staged a mutiny against the crown. Renamed the ship, ran up the crimson flag, and set out as pirates."

Emma was speechless by the time he was done, slumping back against her own dock post. She swallowed heavily, instantly regretting everything she'd said about him being "just a pirate", every time she'd assumed that, just because he was a pirate, he was untrustworthy. "I'm so sorry." She was well aware that she was apologizing for more than just his past, and his intense gaze gave her the feeling that he did as well.

He shrugged. "Thanks, love, but what's done is done." His tone was light, belying something darker. She looked closer, scrutinizing his face carefully, noticing the remnants of fear, panic, and horror in his eyes, the signs of guilt etched into his features. He blamed himself, she realized, but she didn't mention it.

Instead, she asked, "Did you go after the king?"

"Aye. He wasn't a good man, and any number of people in the castle were happy to see him dead. He didn't last the week."

Emma felt as though, morally speaking, she shouldn't feel satisfied at what he'd said, but she couldn't help but feel as though justice had been served. She definitely shouldn't tell him what she felt, but she didn't hold that back either. "Good." He looked over at her, surprised, and she grinned over at him.

"Well, love, I told you it wasn't a happy story, and it's definitely not what you needed to hear after the day you just had." He stood, reaching down a hand to help her up. She took it gratefully. "Might I escort you to your room?"

She laughed, once again marveling at the ease with which the antiquated words slipped from his tongue. "Sure, pirate, but no funny business." She kept her tone light, a smile in her words.

"You wound me, love!" His own light tone turned earnest, his smile sincere. "I wouldn't dream of it."