18 days later, things had, surprisingly, settled into a somewhat new normal. B'Elanna and Harry worked Alpha shift concurrently, Harry at his ops station, B'Elanna manning a secondary ops console in the science lab on Deck 7. In a streak of fairly unremarkable weeks, B'Elanna and Harry were able to settle into a comfortable rhythm, working on projects that had gone unattended for too long. And though the sting of her demotion still struck her each morning and each evening as she passed Main Engineering, and her shame still snuck up on her anytime she ran across any of the engineering crew, she was able to find a fair amount of satisfaction in collaborating with Harry and working to improve ships operations from a different lens.
Her relationship or interaction with Captain was essentially non-existent. B'Elanna had absolutely no desire to see the Captain, and the few times she had needed to bring something to the Bridge or come close to interacting with a any of the senior officers while they were in close-proximity to the Captain, she did her best to do so silently and while drawing the least amount of attention to herself.
Of course, her relationships with the rest of the senior officers remained much the same as ever. A week after her demotion she had met Chakotay in the mess hall for lunch, and while she'd at first felt incredibly self-conscious about the position he was in, and her obvious transgressions that he had never mentioned, they quickly sank back into a comfortable banter, and she was more grateful than she could say for his easy-going manner and quiet support.
Harry Kim, however, while not the most driven task-master, was deeply emotionally invested in the feelings of his Voyager "family," and he was wounded to his core that two people he respected and loved - who he knew had a unique but caring relationship - were now deeply unhappy and not on speaking terms. He spent more than a few hours over the course of the three weeks conjoling B'Elanna to try to mend her relationship with the Captain.
"You know that you want to. Just…. Next time you see her in the mess hall, ask if you can join her. What's the worst that could happen?"
B'Elanna practically snarled at him.
"The worst that could happen, Harry? The worst that could happen is that, in front of everyone, she tells me she doesn't want me to sit with her because I endangered the lives of the entire crew and I'm a disgrace to the Starfleet uniform I'm wearing". B'Elanna turned away to resume the work she was doing on a gel pack outside Cargo Bay 1.
Harry pressed his lips together, but forged on with the conversation, aware that he was incrementally putting himself at risk of grave bodily injury.
"She would never say that to you, especially in front of the crew. Look, I know you want to make this better. You can't be happy with the way things are right now - the Captain certainly has been less than pleasant since the accident. Why not just try?"
"Why not just try." B'Elanna's voice inched upwards in both volume and pitch, alerting Harry to the dangerous water he was wading into.
"Because, Harry, I have no interest in having her tell me again what an enormous disappointment I am, and how I'm not capable of running an Engine Room if I can't follow simple directions". Her voice was running out of anger, and it was being replaced with sadness.
Harry pushed on, steeling himself for the onslaught. "But you don't know that she still feels that way! Maybe she's calmed down, and you've calmed down, and you can just sit down and work it out….."
B'Elanna exploded beside him, almost literally knocking him off his feet. "Calmed down? You think she's calmed down? How does she seem to you, Starfleet?" The use of her old and familiar nickname, something she'd long stopped using except to expertly needle Harry about his obsessive-compulsive tendencies, now caught B'Elanna off-guard.
She stopped, looking down and then turning her body away. Harry thought maybe he'd gone too far, and opened his mouth to try to apologize, when B'Elanna spoke up softly.
"I know the Captain and I disagree all the time, and I'm sure everyone's sick and tired of having my bad attitude create trouble for everyone… but Captain Janeway's opinion of me is quite possibly the closest thing I'll ever had to…. parental... approval. I'm sure that sounds silly to you, or like an over-reaction, but it's true, I really can't risk screwing it up any more than I already have". The words were soft and clipped, and B'Elanna's shame in her feelings was evident in her hunched shoulders and gaze that never left the floor.
Harry sat for a moment with that information, wracking his brain for the right words, or the right gestures to cheer up his friend.
"I know my family situation isn't the same, and I'm not saying I understand how you feel, but I do understand wanting to make someone proud, especially if that person is the Captain. We all do. Maybe not as much as you, or for the same reasons, but we all want her to be proud of us… and happy that we're the crew she has for this voyage. But the longer you go on like this, the less likely you are to ever tell her how you feel. Just… think about it, okay?"
B'Elanna nodded, and then there was silence between them.