"So," Kakashi said, once they had reached one of the expansive training grounds in the forests that surrounded the village. "I know you just took your graduation test, but I have a test of my own to see if you're ready to be a genin."

Naruto groaned internally. Another test? He snuck a glance over at Sasuke. The black-haired boy's face was perfectly expressionless, but his dark eyes caught Naruto looking at him. Sasuke rolled his eyes at him, and Naruto felt blood rushing to his cheeks. What is he so smug about-

"Naruto!" Kakashi barked. "Pay attention."

"Sorry, Kakashi-sensei."

"Like I was saying," Kakashi said, lifting his right hand. In between his fingers dangled a pair of bells, jingling softly as he shook them. "You'll have two hours to get a bell from me. If you get a bell, you pass, and I'll train you. If you don't get one, you're going back to the Academy."

"What?!" Naruto squawked. "You can't send us back! We passed the graduation exam!"

"If I remember correctly, Naruto, you didn't actually take the graduation test, did you?"

"Well-I-but…"

"Shut up and let him talk, idiot," Sasuke said to Naruto. Kakashi's only visible eye crinkled in a smile, and he pulled a timer from one of his pockets, wound it up to set it, and then placed it on the ground.

"Watch the timer so you can keep track of how long you have left. Oh, and also—if you're not willing to kill me for the bells, you won't be able to get them. Don't hold back." He tapped a button on the top of the timer and then stood up.

"Begin."

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Sasuke's hand move, weaving the signs of a jutsu and flying to his mouth.

"Fire Release! Great Fireball Technique!" Sasuke yelled, and then the world became fire. Searing streams of red and orange and pops of yellow filled Naruto's vision, and he yelped as fire missed him by mere inches. He jumped away and landed on his backside in the grass. The heat was so intense, he felt as though his eyebrows were about to burst into flame. The area where Kakashi was standing vanished entirely under a carpet of fire, and Naruto gasped. Was Kakashi-sensei dead?

The fire dissipated, leaving a gigantic scorch mark on the field and embers sparking next to smoking grass. And slightly to the left of the mark, entirely untouched, Kakashi raised a single eyebrow.

"Was that all?" he said mildly, hooking the bells to his belt and taking a novel with an orange cover out of one of his pockets. "Hm. Sloppy."

Sasuke looked like someone had slapped him. Naruto glared at him.

"Yo, bastard!" he yelled at Sasuke. "Are you trying to hit him or me?"

Sakura ran forward, hand arcing forward to let a trio of shuriken fly out. Kakashi didn't even look up from his book as he dodged them, then landed a kick that sent the girl into the dirt.

"You're going to have to try harder than that, Sakura," Kakashi said, turning a page in his book. Sasuke unleashed a barrage of fireballs, a half dozen of them flying towards Kakashi. With a blur, Kakashi disappeared, flickering into existence behind Sasuke. With a single punch, he sent the boy flying.

And then Naruto stood alone. Alone against a jounin. He smirked over at Sasuke, who was groaning, laid out on his back. Time to show him how it's done.

"Shadow Clone Jutsu!" he shouted. Kakashi looked up from his book lazily as two dozen blond little monsters rushed him, grinning maniacally. With a puff of smoke, Kakashi vanished. The clones stopped running, confused. Dispelling the shadow clones, Naruto scratched his head.

"Where did he-unngghh!" Naruto cried out as a hand grabbed his ankle.

"Earth Style! Headhunter Jutsu!" Kakashi roared, yanking Naruto into the earth until only his head remained above ground. Kakashi blurred, appearing again by an old tree stump. He took a seat and turned the page of his book again.

"Nice try, kids."

The timer had ten minutes left on it, and Sakura was getting desperate. She was missing a sandal, her hair was tangled and muddy from being thrown in a fucking river, and she had a nasty burn on her leg from where Sasuke had accidentally clipped her with one of his damn fireballs.

And Kakashi hadn't even put down his book.

Sasuke's mouth was red from breathing out fire, and he was panting. Naruto didn't look tired at all, but he was covered from neck to toe with dirt and mud. They were going to fail. She was going to fail, and then her parents would just shake their heads and tell her that they knew she didn't have what it took to be a ninja.

She wasn't going to let that happen. She couldn't let that happen.

"Guys," she said, wiping mud off her face, "listen…"

Naruto and Sasuke ran at Kakashi again, and went flying back in different directions as the older ninja rebuffed them easily, one by one.

"Listen!" Sakura said, growing angry. There was still no response from her teammates, as Kakashi sent Naruto crashing into Sasuke. Frustrated, she marched forward and punched Naruto in the face.

Naruto and Sasuke stared at her, eyes wide with shock.

"Listen!" she snarled. "We keep attacking individually, and he's toying with us. He's a jounin. Our only advantage is that there's three of us and one of him. We have to work together!"

Sasuke frowned, then nodded. Naruto glared at him, already opening his mouth to argue, and Sakura narrowed her eyes at him. She raised her fist again, and Naruto shut his mouth hastily.

"Ok," he said. "What's the plan?"

There was complete silence for a couple minutes, but Kakashi could sense the genin huddling behind one of the trees. He had to admit, he was a little disappointed. For over an hour and a half, he'd pounded them into the dirt, and none of them had even come close to learning the lesson of the test.

Team Seven didn't fight as a team. They fought as individuals, running in one by one, getting in each other's way, and wasting time and energy. Kakashi knew all too well what happened when a dysfunctional team like this was thrown into the front lines. The scar on the left side of his face was proof enough of that. He checked the timer, resting in the middle of the field. Five minutes left, and then he could fail the brats and go get drunk off his ass again.

Then, over by the treeline, a wall of orange-hoodie-wearing genin ran at him. Kakashi raised an eyebrow at that; it was kind of impressive that the kid could summon that many shadow clones without passing out.

The clones surrounded him, lunging and grabbing at his belt. Kakashi dodged them easily enough, landing punches and elbows and kicks. All around him, clones vanished into poofs of gray smoke as he struck them down. One clone took a punch to the jaw and went sprawling, but didn't dissipate into smoke. Well, Kakashi thought, I found the real one.

From behind the mass of clones, a slight form darted forward, almost too fast to see. Sakura slipped under his guard, fingers inches from the bells on his belt. She stiffened as Kakashi's hand closed around her wrist like a vice.

There was a rush of air, and he knew Sasuke had used the distraction to flicker behind him. The Uchiha was fast-but not fast enough. Sasuke's hand brushed the bells on his belt, almost grabbing them, but Kakashi pulled Sakura and slammed her into him. The two genin hit the ground with a grunt.

The timer went off, and the kids groaned. Kakashi smiled.

"Well, well. It seems like no one was able to get a bell." He let them stew for a moment, watching them glower and seethe with frustration until he broke out laughing.

"You don't seem very happy for people who just passed the bell test."