AN: Time to earn this fic's rating. 💗
Chapter 6: The Urge to Live
Rin trudged as far down the lakeshore as she could to distance herself from the demon. The wind blew at her back, doing nothing to cool down her face, which burned in embarrassment.
Of course he had rejected her. What had she been thinking? That a few days of kindness would make him open up—much less become attracted to her? She should have known better by now. They might have only spent a week and a half together in constant company, but the fact that she still hardly knew anything about him should have tipped her off as to how he would respond.
She could count what she knew of him on one hand.
He was a demon with enhanced senses (but what kind of demon remained unknown).
He did not like to speak when he did not have to, but he was fine with listening; in fact, he was very attentive, even when he didn't seem to be paying attention.
He was proud and hated relying on her for help, but the more comfortable they had gotten, the less he protested.
He preferred to eat natural foods, and what meats he ate, he consumed raw.
He had a deep interest in astronomy and a love of travel.
But she knew nothing else. She didn't know what he did for a living, who his family was, or how old he was.
Of course, the worst of it was she still didn't even know his name! And if he couldn't trust her with that most basic of information, then she obviously remained a temporary nuisance he had to put up with while he was recovering.
But he was completely recovered now, so there was no need to bother with her any longer.
She should have known he wouldn't want her. It wasn't even just about being human anymore. After twenty-six years of living, it was getting harder to convince herself that she could be loved by a man when all the evidence pointed out otherwise.
Although…she supposed that wasn't entirely true. There had been one boy in high school who had admitted he liked her: Sango Fukushima's younger brother, Kohaku. But he only confessed to it a couple years after the fact, once he had moved onto liking someone else. Rin couldn't blame him for keeping quiet about it—she knew all too well the feelings of futility surrounding one-sided loves and useless confessions—but part of her still wished he had been able to tell her at the time, if only so she could feel what it was like to be important enough to someone to warrant that courageous step.
But again, she would be the pot calling the kettle black, because she had not had the courage to do so for her teenage crushes either. She blamed her childhood on that. It wasn't easy to get over passing through so many families with not one (until the Higurashis) willing to love her enough, so she guarded her heart well. If her experience as a foster child had taught her anything, it was that unconditional love was rare, and when you finally found it, it should be nurtured.
Yet it had to be found first, and that was the difficult part.
But that's not what this is, silly, she told herself as she kept walking without looking at where she was really going. Of course you can't fall in love after only a week and a half…even if you've spent almost every moment of those days together. This is an infatuation and nothing more. At least on your part. On his, it's nothing. So stop expecting it to be something.
She wiped away the tears that jumped to her eyes. But this sure is one hell of an infatuation.
She finally stopped when she came to the bend in the lake that marked its end and looked around to make sure no one else was there. She hadn't seen any other resort visitors in her entire time here, though, so she wasn't too worried. She peeled off her clothes and placed her bar of natural soap—no chemicals to pollute the water—on a rock before she waded into the lake.
Ever since they came down to the lake a week ago, she had taken to swimming/bathing every day, since she hadn't been able to fully immerse herself in water until that point. She had been aware she smelled like dirt, sweat, and all things forest, and if that was the only thing putting the demon off, that would be great.
But she knew it wasn't.
Still, he had a sensitive nose, and even she had gotten annoyed with the grime building up after camping for five days on the mountain. Up there, she had washed her face, arms, and legs every day in the mountain stream, but she had only scrubbed down the rest of herself a few times, especially since it had been so chilly in the shadows of the trees, and the stream water was frigid.
She shivered as the lake slowly swallowed her, for despite the warm air, it was still cool. At least with the sun shining down on her, the water felt somewhat refreshing. At this point, there was nothing for it but to dive in. She waded until she was waist-deep and then pulled up her feet to plunge. She swam underwater for a moment to acclimate to the temperature before popping back up and taking a deep breath of sunshine and autumn air.
"Yes, that's exactly what I needed," she sighed, lying on her back. She stretched and floated like that for some time, letting the sun warm the parts of her body that broke the water's surface.
After several minutes of just swimming, she went back to the rock and grabbed her soap. She gave her entire body a good scrub, making sure to lather it in her hair as well. Some days, she would wash her dirty clothes too, since she had only brought a few pairs to rotate out as she washed them, but since she was heading home today, there was no need.
She got out of the water and grabbed her small wicking towel, running it over her limbs and ringing out her hair.
She was just reaching for the clean sports bra she had brought along when an unfamiliar voice cut through the air.
"Well, well, what do we have here?"
Rin yelped and whirled around, clutching the towel to her bosom and squatting down to hide herself better. Her heart hammered in her chest as her eyes found those of a man standing on a boulder only a couple meters away. How had she not heard him arrive?
The man wore an athletic jersey and shorts, his long, black hair tied back in a high ponytail. Sharp, ice-blue eyes pinned her to the ground. Then she noticed the bit of fur hanging out the back of his shorts.
No, not fur. A tail. Like…a wolf's tail.
This man was also a demon.
Her heart rattled against her ribcage. What are the chances that I've never run into a demon in my life, and now I meet two within two weeks?
"Excuse you!" Rin cried out. "Why are you spying on a lady while she's washing?"
"It's not exactly spying if I'm out in the open like this, is it? You're just the one who didn't notice me." He sniffed then. "Then again, as a human, it seems like you wouldn't have noticed me coming anyway. What's someone like you doing here?"
"L-Leave me alone," Rin said. "I just came for a swim and a bath. I'm not here to bother you."
"No can do, sweetheart. You don't look like the type to lie, but you're also not supposed to be here. That makes you a threat, and we have a duty to eliminate threats."
"What do you mean I'm not supposed to be here? I got a ticket to this place the same as you, I suspect!"
The wolf demon's eyes widened. "Did you now?"
She had him off-guard. Now was her chance. "Look, I won't tell anyone I met a demon here. I promise!"
Her heart was trying to push its way out of her chest now. If her demon had believed her, then maybe she could convince this one as well….
But the wolf demon vanished from the rock, and not a second later, he was in front of her. He grabbed her arm, yanking her up. The towel fell out of her hands, and Rin yelped, trying to pull out of his grasp, but it was like an iron manacle.
"You say that, but everyone knows humans can't be trusted with that kind of secret. So for that, you won't be leaving here alive." Noticing Rin's stricken look, he absently tacked on, "Sorry, doll. ...You know, come to think of it, it's been an age since I last had human meat. The boys'll love this treat." His frigid eyes then ran down her exposed form. "Though it's rather a shame, you bein' so pretty and all. In fact…some of the boys would probably get angry with me if I let you go to waste like that. So I guess you're staying alive for at least a little longer."
Before Rin could even try to protest, the wolf demon threw her over his shoulder. The impact knocked the wind out of her, but she flailed, trying to kick him in the gut or groin—whatever she hit first.
He smacked her naked butt. "Hey, stop movin' around, or I'll really make it hurt the next time."
Incensed, Rin reached over and yanked on his ponytail with all her might.
"Yow!" the demon screeched.
Suddenly, something slashed against the backs of her thighs, leaving white-hot trails. Rin cried out and curled against his shoulder in pain.
"Do that again, and I'll do more than just scratch you." His finger then swiped against one of the wounds, and she winced. "Mmm. You've got some good-tasting blood, girly. You're going to make a fine meal."
"Help!" Rin screamed as the wolf demon bounded away from the lake.
He just laughed. "Ain't no one gonna help you out here, girly."
Rin's mind went blank as she tried to figure out what to do. Blood trickled down the backs of her legs, and at the speed the demon was going from this height—how was it possible they were jumping above the trees?—even if she threw herself off, she might just kill herself in the fall.
The fear that in mere moments she would be raped and eaten hovered like a specter over her mind, paralyzing her. No one would ever find out what happened to her, because there would be nothing left to find.
I have to escape. But how? Even if I manage to run away, he's so fast!
Suddenly, the demon landed like a thunderbolt and threw her to the ground. Pain shot through her thighs from the scratches, and she curled in on herself to hide her nakedness—
And then noticed the dozen pairs of eyes staring at her in surprise from around some campfires.
"What's this, Kouga?" a wolf demon with short, gray hair asked.
"Something I found wandering by the lake, Ginta," Kouga answered.
"Can we eat her?" one with a blond Mohawk asked.
"Why do you think I brought her back, Hakkaku?"
"Do we have to eat her right away?" a burly wolf demon with a deep voice and large fangs snarled. The predatory way he looked at her caused Rin to shiver and grasp herself even more tightly. They would have to cut off her arms and legs before she opened up.
"She is a pretty one, ain't she?" Kouga answered. "Course, that sorta thing's not really my style, so you guys do what you want. Just make sure not to bruise the meat. After all, this'll be our first human meal in, what, almost two hundred years?"
"What a way to start off this year's retreat!" Hakkaku cried out with a fist pump.
Ginta was salivating with a far-off look in his eyes. "Oh man, human meat…. It's been so long."
"You're all animals!" Rin shrieked, tears prickling at her eyes. "How can you talk about me like I don't even understand what you're saying? Have none of you any decency?"
Kouga's nose scrunched up. "Oh yeah, I should mention: she's kinda mouthy. Anyone bring some duct tape? We should probably shut her trap."
"I've got some, Kouga!" a skinny, teenage wolf demon piped up, waving a roll.
"Might as well tie up her hands too. She's a fighter," Kouga added, rubbing the back of his head with a wince.
Rin flinched at the screech of the roll of duct tape unwinding.
What can I do? I'm surrounded. If I try to attack one of them, the others will only grab onto me. If I try to run, they'll catch me.
The young wolf demon with the duct tape knelt down in front of her. "Now hold still like a good girl—"
Rin slapped his face.
The pack of wolf demons just stared at her in shock.
"T-Touch me…and you'll regret it," Rin said, though her voice wavered with fear. Oh, why couldn't she hold her emotions in check? It would have been more convincing otherwise.
"Wow…. This girl is either really brave or really stupid," Ginta stage-whispered to Hakkaku.
The hulking, large-fanged wolf demon then jumped over and grabbed her outstretched arm, yanking it behind her back. He reached down and snagged her other arm, purposely groping her breast as he did. He pulled it behind her as well, exposing her chest to the entire pack.
"C'mon, kid, let's get this over with," he snarled at the adolescent demon with the duct tape. In seconds, her hands were bound. The big brute had to hold her head still for the teen to place the duct tape over her mouth. Then the bigger demon stood up and came around, shoving the boy aside. He knelt down so they were eye-to-eye.
"Well boys? Shall we inspect the meat?" he asked, running his hands along her thighs, his taloned thumbs tracing the crevices between her hips and legs.
Rin screamed at him through the duct tape, trying to scooch away without opening her legs.
And then the burly brute was lifted off his knees, a clawed hand wrapped around his throat. Steam rose from the points where talons dug into his neck.
"Touch her again, and you'll regret it."
Rin shivered as that deep, silky voice she craved hearing so much coursed through the entire campsite with even more power than if it had been a shout.
Rin wanted to cry in relief. He's here. Her beautiful, silver-haired demon. Though he was bare-chested, a fur lay over his right shoulder—was that the fur from his coat?—and despite his frayed pants being covered in dust, he still managed to look more majestic than any of the slobbish wolf-demons in their athletic wear.
Then she noticed then that he was lifting the wolf demon with his left arm, the pink scar staning out in relief against his white skin.
He really is completely healed. But he still came to save me.
Her heart surged with an emotion she could only define as love.
"Sesshoumaru?" Kouga asked. "What are you doing here? And what the heck happened to you?"
Rin's heart lurched again. Sesshoumaru. She would carve that name so deeply into her heart, she would never forget it.
Sesshoumaru turned to Kouga, still dangling the massive wolf demon, who wriggled in his grasp as he choked. "Leave before my poison eats through this mangy beast's neck."
"Hey man, what's your deal? We found her trespassing and just wanted to get rid of the evidence for you."
Sesshoumaru's brows furrowed in a way that Rin knew meant his patience was nearly gone. "Are you that stupid, or is the one collective brain cell you lot possess only focused on humping? If you kill her, her disappearance will launch an investigation—one that leads straight back to us."
Kouga growled. "So what do you plan to do about it, Mr. High-and-Mighty? We can't let her go. She's seen too much."
"I will handle it. Now leave."
Kouga sized him up. "You don't seem to be in any shape to be making threats, Sesshoumaru. Especially when there's twelve of us against you."
"Heh. I only need one hand to be able to deal with you weaklings."
Kouga seemed to weigh that over. Finally he turned his back on Sesshoumaru and waved him off. "Look, I don't want to sour our little trip from the start over some petty misunderstanding. Let's head out, boys. We'll leave the girl's fate to Sesshoumaru."
Sesshoumaru dropped the wolf demon, who landed like a boulder, coughing, wheezing, and clawing at his neck. Hakkaku and Ginta both ran over to him and slung one arm each over their shoulders, carrying him as they retreated with the rest of the pack.
Rin watched as they ran off, and Kouga looked back, meeting her eyes and sneering at her before the wolf demons disappeared into the trees.
Something soft wrapped around Rin's shoulders, and she flinched away from the contact. She turned to find Sesshoumaru kneeling in front of her, frozen in the act of wrapping her in his fur. She tried to apologize, but the duct tape gag muffled her words.
"Hold still," he said. He gripped the edge of the duct tape, his eyes a thundercloud as her ripped it off in one smooth move.
Rin grunted in pain. This was ten times worse than waxing. It felt like he had taken half the skin of her lips off with it.
Sesshoumaru moved behind her and sliced through the duct tape around her wrists, tearing it off in another single motion, for which she was thankful. She brought her hands back around and rubbed her wrist and mouth, hugging his fur close to her chest to preserve what little was left of her modesty. He knelt back in front of her.
"T-Thank you—" She broke off as her throat clogged up.
Suddenly, she threw her arms around Sesshoumaru's neck and burst into tears. He gathered her into his arms and flew—Since when could he fly?—away from the wolf demons' abandoned campsite.
Her last trip through the air had been a haze of panic and fear. But as she turned her head into his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart under her forehead, she cried in a mix of relief and delayed shock.
She had come so close to being raped and dying. If Sesshoumaru hadn't come for her….
Her hands still jittered, and her heart pounded so hard against her chest, she was sure Sesshoumaru could feel it reverberating against his. He soon landed at their campsite and ducked into the tent, laying her down on her stomach.
"I will tend your wounds," he said. Rin just nodded miserably, burying her face into the fur. The strands caressed her face in the same silky soft manner of his hair slipping through her fingers.
The familiar click of the first aid kit and the scent of antiseptic filled the air. Soon, the cool press of a wet cloth against her skin made her shiver.
After a couple minutes, Sesshoumaru finished cleaning her wounds, but he made no move to bandage them. "These scratches are deep. The blood isn't clotting quickly."
Rin tried to look over her shoulder, but it was difficult to gauge the wounds from this angle and distance. "They might stop soon once we bandage them…or we'll just have to cauterize them to be safe."
His face darkened. "I do not wish to cause you more pain."
"It's the only way."
He shook his head. "There is another. A far simpler remedy." He glanced at her. "Turn around and rest. I will not harm you."
She didn't know what he planned to do, but she trusted him. He had saved her life, after all. So she turned around and closed her eyes, taking deep breaths to calm herself.
Seconds later, she felt something warm and wet lap across the wounds. She stiffened and peeked over her shoulder. Her eyes widened.
Sesshoumaru was bent over her legs, licking her wounds like a dog.
She gaped. "What are you doing? That's unsanit—" She froze as Sesshoumaru suddenly glared at her, his eyes flashing red and his stripes growing jagged. She turned away and let him continue.
A simpler remedy indeed. She knew saliva had a coagulant in it—hence why animals licked their wounds so. She hadn't realized Sesshoumaru had such a…primal side to him. This was not the refined demon she knew.
She thought his eyes only grew red when he was angry, but was there more to it than that? Did any sort of deep emotion trigger the reflex? That demon—Kouga—had said her blood tasted good. Was Sesshoumaru enjoying the taste even as he helped her? But he said he didn't eat humans, so—
She gasped as he licked mere inches from the apex of her thighs. Her face burned and her sex tingled. The fur tucked between her legs grew hot and damp against her. He paused in his ministrations.
Oh goodness, please tell me he can't smell that. But she knew how keen his senses were, so she needed to distract herself—and him.
"D-Didn't you say your whole body is poisonous?" she blurted out. Yes, think of poison. Deadly poison, bad for libido. Bad. "Why doesn't your, um…saliva…hurt?"
He gave her another lick. "I should hope that after all this time, I can control my own secretions."
Rin wanted to bury her head back into the fur. Does he even realize how that sounded coupled with what he's doing right now?
Her core twisted, and she had to fight from squeezing her legs together.
After a couple more minutes, he finally, finally, pulled away and rummaged through the first aid kit. He elevated on leg on his knee, and she peeked over her shoulder again to find him wrapping bandages around her thighs. She didn't realize she was holding her breath until he was finished and she let it out with a head-hanging sigh.
He moved so quickly and silently, she didn't realize he had until there was a finger under her chin, tilting her head back up, and she was looking back into his normal, golden eyes. But his words still leaked anger. "Did he do anything else to you, Rin?"
The memories doused her arousal in seconds, and the tears burst past the dam once again. She shook her head, trying to form the word "no," but she just couldn't do it. He reached out to her, and she pushed herself up to move into his arms, where she settled in his lap and clung to him as she wept.
It took several minutes for her to cry out the rest of her tears, and then she spent several more just lying against him. The entire time, his thumbs moved back and forth in soothing strokes across her shoulder and knee.
With anyone else, she would have forced herself to get up and move away even before she felt calmed and comfortable, knowing her weight and silence would be awkward and too much. But she knew he didn't mind silence, and he had already demonstrated just how strong a demon he was.
After a while though, she finally sat up and wiped her eyes. Sesshoumaru's arms fell away from her. She sniffed, hiding her face from him in her hands. "I'm sorry I'm such a mess." She took a deep breath and pulled back her eyes, waving at them to dry them faster. "You were right, of course. Demons can be very frightening."
"That is why you need to leave. You are in danger here. They are not the only demons on the premises."
She was starting to realize as such. Nevertheless, she leaned back against his chest, her head on his shoulder. Please, I just want to enjoy this closeness for a little longer. "Maybe so, but I know I'm safest right here."
"That is not true."
She popped up again, feeling some of her fire return, despite her dampened mood. "Of course it is. I said demons can be very frightening—not that all demons are frightening." She reached out and cupped his face, rotating it to face hers. "You're not like them, Sesshoumaru."
His eyes widened when she said his name, and she faltered. "Don't worry. I won't tell anyone. I'm just…so glad I finally know what to call you. I'm glad to know the name of my savior."
She took a deep breath and resolved to do what she felt would be the bravest action in her entire life. "Thank you for saving my life, Sesshoumaru."
She stretched up and kissed his cheek.
Sesshoumaru froze as her lips made contact with his skin. The press of that soft flesh against his felt more like a sledgehammer coming down on a thick sheet of ice, cracks racing across it. The kiss sent a tingling sensation skittering across his nerves—an electric jolt straight to his heart.
His hackles rose. Between the fact that those mangy wolves' stenches were all over her body and that his fur was wrapped around her most intimate of places—he could feel her nipples peaked against it, and damn it all, he had nearly gone mad earlier when he scented her arousal and felt the wetness seeping into his fur—he was already having trouble keeping it together.
Now a kiss?
This is why he had told her she wasn't safe with him. He had to get that through to her.
When she pulled back, he frowned and grabbed both her arms, making sure not to touch her abused wrists. He held her so close that they were nearly nose to nose. He unleashed just a hint of the demonic energy that started his transformations, his blood surging and his fangs elongating. "Do not test me, Rin."
Her eyes widened as she took in his face, but then she pursed her lips at him. "You don't scare me, Sesshoumaru. Even if your eyes are red."
"You should be scared," he said, grasping her arms tighter even as he fought to keep his talons from digging into her flesh. He didn't want to hurt her—just frighten her.
"Why? Because you're a demon?"
"Yes. You are naked in my arms, wrapped in my very own fur, and you think you do not tempt me? I am no better than they."
She scowled at him. "How can you say that? It's like saying all humans are good in contrast or even that all humans are murderers. There are no absolutes. Yes, I have learned that some demons are indeed brutes. But there are those that aren't—like you. You would never ravish nor eat me."
"I would ravish you right this second if you let me."
She gasped, and even his eyes widened, surprised at how the truth had slipped from his lips.
He never spoke out of turn. Every word of his was always precise and calculated. What was this woman doing to him?
"You…want to…ravish me?" Her heartbeat quickened again, forcing blood into her cheeks and—damn it all again—into her sex. She shifted in his lap, and the dual sensation of his fur slithering between her legs and her legs sliding against his thighs caused his cock to jerk.
No, no, no. He could not let this go any further. He had to make her leave. Make her want to leave.
Even if that meant saying things he didn't mean.
"Only to get that stench of wolf off you. It offends me."
Instead of looking insulted, however, she peered at him, like she was trying to puzzle him out. "You really are a canine, aren't you?"
"What does that matter?"
"You're right—it doesn't. After all, whatever you are, you must be magnificent."
His heart jerked at her words. It was not the first time he had heard that term applied to his person. His longstanding servant, Jaken, rattled off such platitudes on a near hourly basis. He didn't doubt that Jaken believed what he said, but the imp treated Sesshoumaru more like a god to worship—and worship often became a repetitive habit.
So why did her words feel more…genuine? Like she sees me and not some image of what I should be. Like everyone else does.
"It's just…the way you're acting, you remind me of a dog wanting to mark your territory. On me." They way she glanced back up at him from beneath her eyelashes caused his cock to give another mighty twitch.
Yes, that must be exactly what this feeling is, he reasoned. And no modern woman would wish to be treated as such.
He could still salvage this situation and send her home before they went too far.
"You're right. I simply view you as mine and wish to make it known."
The words had made sense in his head, but they appeared to have the opposite of his desired effect, because instead of making her scowl at him in post-modern feminist rage, her blush only deepened.
Still, if her silence was any indicator, she appeared to be chewing over his words. Eventually, she looked up and stared directly into his eyes.
"So, let me get this straight. You're saying you only want me for my body? Because someone else dared to touch it?"
No, he didn't. She was not toy, a thing to be used and discarded as he pleased. She was so much more than that. She had brought light into a time of his life where he should have been drowning in a deep sea of despair. After all, his younger, half-demon brother had humiliated him, bringing him nearly to the point of death, rendering him unconscious, and giving him enough wounds to leave him wounded for over a week. Sesshoumaru's temper should have shaken the mountains. His shame and vindictiveness should have known no bounds.
But he had nearly forgotten all that over the past week and a half as this girl barged into his life and made him look at the world—at humans—in a different way.
This girl who had only ever seen him at his weakest and still wanted him. If he had shown such weakness in front of any female demon, she would have either abandoned him or used his powerlessness against him, asserting her own dominance in their relationship from that moment forward.
But not Rin. He didn't have to hide anything from her. He realized that now.
But that fact did not erase the dangerous reality of their situation and world, so he had to say the damning words. She couldn't stay here. This could not go further.
So why couldn't he speak?
She appeared to interpret his silence—and whatever hint of his feelings dared show on his face. "Sesshoumaru, do you want me—all of me—that badly?" she whispered, and the scent of her arousal was so thick, he couldn't help his answer.
"Yes."
Rin looked up at Sesshoumaru, her stomach a Gordian knot at this point. No man had ever admitted to wanting her like this before. Heck, it had been hard enough to find a family that wanted her badly enough to adopt her, let alone find a man who wanted her just as much as she wanted him.
And she wanted him right now, with every fiber of her being.
She knew it would be beyond reckless. She was not on birth control—there was no need to waste the money on it when there was no chance of having sex. For that same reason, she had no condoms, nor would she have ever thought to bring any on a solo camping trip even if she did buy them.
She knew this was a temptation to stray from her vow to stay chaste until marriage. Knew that she had the ability to say "no," and he would let her go, and that would be it.
But then she would have to leave, because how could she stay here next to him after this moment and not constantly think about what could have been or what could still be?
Besides…she was feeling a little reckless.
She had been seconds away from dying. Not as a virgin, in the technical sense, given the wolf demons' cruel plans for her, but still never having known the physical love that most others got to enjoy.
She knew life could be unexpectedly short—her parents and brothers were a testament to that. Sometimes life was so short, it barely even started. There had been more than one baby she helped deliver who died due to complications.
There were no guarantees in life. She could die tomorrow. At the rate her life was going, she would run into another demon and actually be devoured this time. Or she could get into a car accident on her way home or to Tokyo, where the drivers thought they were competing on a speedway.
And if she did die, wouldn't this be a huge regret? Not necessarily just dying as a virgin—although that would be one hell of a regret within itself—but dying without acting on her feelings for him. Because whatever this was she shared with Sesshoumaru, it was real. And it went both ways.
Carpe diem. Seize the day.
"Then you can have me," she murmured, pushing herself up and pressing her lips to his. She cupped her hands against his head, making sure he couldn't move away—because she felt in her heart that, for whatever reason, he was trying his best to distance himself—and though she had never kissed before, she tried to apply what all her romance novel reading had taught her. She brushed her tongue against his lips, asking for permission, and like a key fitting into a lock, her tongue slipped through as he opened to her.
In her enthusiasm, she thrust her tongue into his mouth—and it sliced against a particularly sharp tooth.
She made a little noise of distress, sucking her tongue back in and pulling away.
"Are you hurt?" he asked as she brought her fingers up to her tongue and tapped it, trying to gauge if there was blood. Her fingers came away with only spit.
"I don't think so. I think…it just took me by surprise."
His grip tightened on her ribcage—when had his hands gotten there? "Rin…we should stop this now before it's too late. My body is dangerous to you." As if to reinforce his words, she felt the pinpricks of his claws against her bare skin, but they did not pierce her. That reassured her.
"No. I was too hasty. I forgot about your, er…fangs." She smiled sheepishly. "You know, the vampire romance novels never seem to mention that peril. It's all about the neck biting with them," she giggled, trying to lighten the mood.
But if anything, his expression only darkened. "Those novels only succeed because humans don't understand the animalistic urges that overtake one in those moments. I am an animal, Rin. A demon one…but an animal nonetheless, even if I do not appear as such right now."
"But you have the utmost control. I've seen it. I trust you," she said, placing her hands against his, purposely running the pads of her thumbs over his lengthy nails.
He stared at her hard for two heartbeats. "I have no control," he said.
Just then, the constricting fur covering her body relaxed. He pulled out a hand from under hers and tore the fur away, baring her chest to him, which he attacked with a hungry mouth. She gasped as he sucked on her nipple, flicking it with his tongue, rolling it between his teeth. He laid her back as he moved to the other, his hand replacing his mouth and massaging her breast.
She moaned as he worked her, her body both excited and falling into torpor. Was she supposed to just lie here like a doll and let him have his way with her? She was so tempted, but she knew she was supposed to reciprocate—somehow.
She noticed his ears then, their pointed tips sticking out and just begging to be nibbled on. She leaned her head forward and grasped the tip of one between her teeth. He froze over her, and encouraged, she sat forward more, nibbling her way down the shell of his ear until it met his jaw, where she placed a kiss.
He turned his head then and took her mouth, this time forcing his tongue into hers and stroking it. She tangled her hands in his hair, running the silk through her fingers and relishing the velvet of his tongue.
Suddenly, he pulled back and ripped the end of the fur from between her legs. She yelped as the friction of it skated across her already sensitive sex. Sesshoumaru brought the fur to his face and buried his nose in it. Rin's cheeks flamed when he gave the fur a lick, and she crushed her thighs together.
He smirked at her. "Just how wet are you to leave such a mess on my fur?" He pushed her so that she was lying back again and took her knees, prying her legs open. She barely resisted, although the rush of cool air back onto her most private of places made her shiver.
Then he lowered his head, and Rin panicked. "Sesshoumaru, no, please—" He cut off her begging with a lap of his tongue against her entrance, and she cried out, bucking against his mouth. He only took it as further invitation; his tongue darted inside, swirling around her, causing her womb to tighten like a spring. He moved in and out, flicking her bud with his tongue and slipping back inside, and Rin moaned and gasped in time with his thrusts.
Her core grew tighter and tighter, and she knew it was only a matter of seconds before she exploded. She needed to let him know.
"Please…don't stop. I'm…so close."
He looked at her over her mound, his canine eyes glinting like he was on the hunt. "You know my name now, Rin. I want to hear you say it as you come."
She couldn't speak—had to save her energy for that one word alone, so she just nodded.
He growled and attacked her sex again with renewed frenzy, concentrating his tongue on flicking her clit as his fingers slid into her.
"Oh please, ah…ah—! Sessh….Sesshoumaru!" she cried out seconds later, throwing back her head as her muscles spasmed.
Her legs drooped as her orgasm leeched the energy out of her, and then the clink of a belt buckle pulled her attention back to him.
Sesshoumaru yanked off his belt and tore open his pants, apparently unable to get them off fast enough. "I cannot wait any longer, Rin. Not when you call out my name like that."
Rin watched in awe as he soon revealed his manhood to her, completely erect and ready for the taking.
What a magnificent penis, Rin thought, her medical mind unable to help but appreciate its fine anatomy. She had seen a plethora of penises before during her clinicals, but the majority were flaccid and attached to old, wrinkly men, so she had never really appreciated one before.
This one was textbook perfection. Then again, she could have been biased, because this one was all hers.
Still, it gave her an idea.
When he moved over her, getting ready to enter, she placed a hand against his chest to stop him. He stilled, but his face tightened as if in pain.
"Rin…I will respect your wishes…but if you're telling me to stop now—"
She put a finger to his lips to silence him. "Shh. Before that, Nurse Rin would like to give you an examination." She smiled playfully at him.
His facial muscles relaxed by degrees. "What…sort of examination?"
She sat up, forcing him back onto his shins. "The kind men don't normally like. But I promise I'll try to make this one—" She reached out and cupped him, giving him a squeeze, which made his nostrils flare as he sucked in a breath. "—more pleasurable." She massaged his sac, reveling in its give. "Hmm, no apparent problems here. Let's check the shaft, shall we?"
Sesshoumaru just watched her with a wide-eyed expression as got on her belly to keep the weight off her wounded thighs and take a closer look at him. She ran a finger up the underside of his penis, and he shivered. "Hmm, this is pretty stiff. In a normal examination, that would be a bad thing, but in this case…the stiffer the better." She stroked it a few more times, watching from the side as his hands clenched into tight fists on this thighs. Her grin widened. "Now, let's check the head."
She hesitated only a second. While she had grown comfortable enough to touch a man's genitals through years of medical work, using her mouth would be a first. She was almost too embarrassed to try, but then she thought, You're an adult, for crying out loud, not some anxious teenager. If he can do it, so can you. Live a little, girl.
She bent down, licked his cock like a popsicle, and then took it in her mouth. She swirled her tongue around the circumference of the head, wicking up his salty precum. Sesshoumaru's arms slammed down on either side of her, caging her in. She looked up at him, his manhood still in her mouth, and noticed the ragged edges to his stripes and red eyes had returned.
He was taking deep, steadying breaths. "Rin…how much longer…will this…examination take?"
She let his member slip out of his mouth with a pop and grinned saucily at him. "I suppose that depends on how much more you can take."
He snarled and flipped her onto her back, roughly enough that it jarred the wounds on the backs of her thighs. She tried to hide her grimace as he climbed over her. His pupils had nearly disappeared in his now-turquoise irises. "I can't take anymore. I have to be inside you now."
Sesshoumaru thrust so suddenly into her and buried himself so deep that Rin cried out in shock and tensed. She gripped his arms with her hands, his waist with her legs, and his shaft with her sex.
He froze.
"Rin…is this your first time?"
She opened her eyes and looked into his, which were widened in…surprise? Apprehension?
"Yes," she admitted, a prickle of defensiveness sending her heart fluttering. She knew it was stranger than not nowadays to be this old and still a virgin, but she hated the look of shock people gave her when they found out, like she was some alien creature that had landed amongst them. Like they were judging her as unfit.
But Sesshoumaru's face didn't have that look of bafflement or judgment on it. Instead, he was the one who appeared wrecked.
"Why?" he asked on a breath.
She scrunched up her brows. "What do you mean, why? I was just waiting for the right person." Granted, I thought I would be married to him first, but….
His brows furrowed in consternation. "I don't understand."
"What's there to not understand?"
"Don't humans consider the first time significant?"
"Yes…."
"Then why me?"
Her face softened as she realized the problem. She reached up and cupped his cheek. "Why not you, silly?"
"I'm a demon, Rin."
"And why should that matter?" She brought her other hand up, her thumbs brushing over the upper stripes along his cheeks. She was going to have to lick those jagged lines later. "You're you, Sesshoumaru. That's why. It doesn't matter to me whether or not you're a demon. You're my quiet, contemplative Sesshoumaru who put up with this human that butted into his life when, as he first said, he could have survived on his own. But even when she was stubborn, this kindhearted Sesshoumaru tolerated her and even went so far as to save her from his own kind when it would have been easier for him to have just let them eat her. This Sesshoumaru just happens to be a demon—a demon that she wants. And this human consented because this demon appeared to want her too."
He brushed the bangs away from her forehead. "I do not know this demon of which you speak."
"Sure you do. He's right here," she said, bringing a hand down to touch his heart. "He's always been here. He just needed time to come out of his shell."
Sesshoumaru shut his eyes, the tiniest of smiles quirking up a corner of his lips. "So you say. All I know is that this demon," he added, taking Rin's hand in his as he held it against his heart, "wants his human whose voice is nature's music, who shows no fear in the face of danger, and who puts the interests of others—including a demon's—above her own."
Tears welled up in Rin's eyes, and her throat tightened. "Who is that?" she chuckled weakly. "Surely not this overly-talkative girl who is simply used to taking care of others and was most definitely afraid."
"But you did not show it," he said, bending down and kissing her forehead. "You never do. Even when a demon is standing right in front of you, you stand your ground, as if you have the power to kill him on the spot."
The tears spilled down Rin's cheeks. "You see? I knew it."
"Knew what?" he asked, kissing away her tears.
She took hold of his face again. "That I made the right choice." She brought his lips to hers and kissed him. This time, she took care to tease her tongue into his mouth, feeling out his fangs so that she would not scrape them but then stoking them sensuously as she plumbed his mouth.
Sesshoumaru moved against her, and she gasped as it sent tingling butterflies of sensation into the knot in her core. It took her a few strokes to overcome all the unease of her stretched opening as well as to learn and match his rhythm, but by then Sesshoumaru had moved onto laying trails of soft kisses along her jaw and down her neck, distracting her.
Every thrust pushed out a groan from deep within her, and her womb just kept tightening and tightening. The strokes against her sex suddenly bordered the line of pleasure and pain, and every movement brought her closer and closer—
Suddenly, Sesshoumaru pulled completely out of her, and her core felt cold and bereft.
She opened her eyes in shock, seeing that his face had gone almost feral.
"What is it?" she asked, reaching up to him.
He grabbed her hand to stop her. "Turn over."
She blinked. "O-Okay." She rolled onto her belly, but as soon as she did, he yanked up her hips so that she was on her knees and elbows. Her thighs stretched in protest, but the pain was nearly lost in the tidal wave of embarrassment that smashed through her body.
"Wait, Sesshou—" But her words cut off as soon as his tip prodded back at her entrance, and in one swift move, he slid back into her. She gasped at the sensation. It already felt so much deeper, seeming to hit different parts of her body.
He renewed his thrusting, and Rin could do nothing in this position but take it. She had never imagined to be doing doggy style her first time—had never imagined her refined Sesshoumaru would do something so animal—but she was quickly realizing that the demonic part of Sesshoumaru took over when he lost control, and truthfully—
She liked it.
She was quickly building back up again, especially when he reached down and fingered her clit, sending shockwaves across her belly.
"Are you close, Rin?"
"I-I think so," she gasped. "Don't stop. Just…a little…more."
His finger strummed her clit just then like a guitar, and all of a sudden, the pressure was too much to bear, and she exploded. "Sesshoumaru!"
The call of his name was like a trigger. He grabbed her shoulders and pulled her up so that her back was flush against his chest. She winced as her torn thighs met his as she sat on him. In a guttural voice, he growled, "You are mine now, Rin."
Then she felt his teeth scrape against the meat of her shoulder—and his fangs pierced her neck.
"Ow!" she yelped just as she felt his hot release within her. "Sesshoumaru, that hurts!"
He let go almost instantly, his grip on her arms like steel. She tried to turn her head to look down at the bite mark, but she couldn't see it, though it throbbed.
"I'm sorry," he murmured, leaning back over her. His breath tickled her ear. "I didn't mean…. I went too far." He then proceeded to lick the wound. She winced, but the soft wetness of his tongue lapping against the bite lulled her away from her irritation and pain.
"It's okay. Just…don't bite like that again."
He paused in his ministrations, and his silence seemed heavy before he answered, "I won't."
She leaned away and turned her head so she could get a better look at him. His eyes were back to normal, although his stripes were still jagged, and he had an unreadable expression on his face. Was he upset that she had chastised him? Her heart broke a little at that.
"It's fine," she said, placing a kiss on his cheek. "We're learning. I only ask that you try to be more gentle next time. If you bite, don't break the skin."
His amber gaze flickered towards her, a spark reigniting. "Next time?"
She bit her lip in shyness. "…Whenever you're ready."
He chuckled. "Perhaps it should be whenever you're ready. A demon's stamina is no small thing."
"I was kinda hoping you'd say that."
AN: You all were SO frustrated last chapter that Sesshoumaru was being so dense. 😝 I hope this chapter made up for it! Let me know if it was steamy enough for your needs.
Now, you might be thinking, "Welp, they've had sex. They're together. This is the end." No, my friends. This is just the beginning. We have a loooong way to go. 😁
Also, I felt really bad writing Kouga like I did, but let's be real—he didn't care about humans at all before he met Kagome. And he has not met her in this story…yet.