With the Stargate Command Rebels gathered near a bazaar on Naboo, Colonel O'Neill told new arrival Jim Kirk about other people who had arrived from other galaxies.
"One of the fellas who popped in was a freak called the Joker. A real clown."
"You don't say."
"I do say. He and Luke didn't get along too well. Plus, he's dangerous and crazy. We had to throw him in the brig."
"If I wish to meet this strange lifeform, where is the brig?"
"Right next to the Rebel washing machines," Luke said.
"We may be on the run most of the time," Daniel said. "But we still have to do laundry."
"The Rebels who do the laundry perform a valuable service," Luke said.
"Yes, indeed," O'Neill said. "Without clean uniforms, how could we fight the Empire and the Goa'uld?"
"Clean clothes make me feel better," Lando said with a laugh.
"And me as well," Vala said. "So I'm glad we have those folks to do their part."
"They free us up to do our jobs," Luke said, earnest as ever.
"They do free us," Vala said.
Kirk chuckled. "It's the same aboard the 'Enterprise.' I assure you….Vala, is it?"
A quick bright smile followed. "That's right. And you are Jim, if I may be so forward."
"Jim is fine."
Leia raised an eyebrow. "I don't think being forward is one of your problems, Vala," she said drily.
"That's 'Royal Bodyguard Vala' to you, Princess." The two traded quick smiles.
More chuckling from Kirk. "You have quite a fun group here, Jack."
"Don't we, though? Fun and friendly. That's us."
"Yep, we're fun," Han said.
"Lots of fun," Leia said.
O'Neill made a fun face. "If not for the Goa'uld and the Empire, we could just have one big party all the time. At our favorite cantina."
"But there is the Empire," Han said glumly.
"There is that," Leia said.
Kirk considered for a moment. "There is a Klingon Empire where I'm from. What is the nature of your Empire?"
"Oh, they're fun folks, trust me."
"And the Goa'uld?"
"Even more fun," Han said.
"You don't want to be taken over by one of those snakes, trust me."
"Snakes?" Kirk said.
"I can brief you on our situation, captain," Leia said formally.
"Maybe I should do that," Han said.
Eyebrows up, Leia supplied a saucy grin. "So first Teal'c, now the captain?"
Han held out his hands as he shrugged a little. "Just trying to be friendly, Your Worship."
"Uh oh," Daniel said. "It's bad when he calls her 'Your Worship.'"
"Very bad," Luke said with a nod.
"Yes, let's all be friends," O'Neill said.
"Speaking of which…." A grinning Vala held out her hands to a man with curly dark hair and a rather pained look on his face. "Captain Kirk. Jim. This is Adrian Monk."
"Oh, yes," O'Neill said. "Mr. Monk has been a huge help to us."
Kirk extended his hand but all Monk did was stare. Then he gestured to Kirk's forehead.
"Could you do something about that curl on your forehead?"
"I can try."
With his usual fearful look, Monk glanced around.
"What is this place?'
"It's called 'Naboo,'" Leia said.
"Seriously?" Monk spoke in a slightly high-pitched frantic tone. "What kind of name is that?"
"What kind of name is 'Adrian?'" O'Neill asked.
Leia tilted her head with a kind of warning look. "Now, colonel. Let's welcome all our guests."
Monk gestured to the area around him. "What's the deal with you people? Everything is so dirty. Your ships are all scuffed up, your robots are all tarnished. Isn't this like science fiction? Everything should be clean and new and shiny."
"Thank you, Mr. Monk," O'Neill said sharply.
Leia held out her hand. "Over here we have Superman."
"Yes!" O'Neill once again raised a finger. "He's been a bit more help to us."
The man in red and blue smiled. "Thank you, Colonel O'Neill."
Monk gestured to the forehead of the figure in red and blue. "Could you do something about that curl over your forehead?"
"If I may, sirs." Carter spoke in a way designed to break through all the commotion (albeit friendly commotion). "All these portals bringing in people from other places-"
"Like our new pal Jim."
"-it's part of our whole galaxy becoming increasingly unstable."
"Unstable, you say? A whole galaxy, you say?"
"Like we don't have enough problems," Han muttered.
O'Neill turned to him. "You're kind of a glass half-empty guy, aren't you, Han? That ever get to you, Chewie?"
As Chewbacca roared his response, O'Neill once again stroked the side of his neck. Lando just laughed.
"You really want to keep hanging around this loser, Chewbacca?"
As Chewbacca roared his response, Kirk frowned.
"An unstable galaxy," he said. "That doesn't sound good."
"It's not," Luke said.
"It could cut your visit short," Daniel said.
"You don't seem to be taking it all that seriously."
Daniel shrugged. "We do this every day."
"When action is called for, we'll take it," Luke said.
Kirk smiled and nodded. "It's the same on the 'Enterprise.'"
Before anyone could respond further, Cam Mitchell arrived. He had his own look of urgency (at least as much as he could under that helmet), and he broke through the clutter and commotion in his own Cam way.
"Luke, we've got company. Star Destroyers and Alkesh ships closing in on the planet. Along with Ba'al's Death Sphere."
"Wish I had the 'Enterprise' to help," Kirk said.
Cam looked confused as he nodded in response. Luke started to move, stopped, gave O'Neill an inquiring look. With a wave of his hand, the colonel responded, "Go! We'll deal with this whole unstable galaxy thing."
"You guys do what you need to do," Han said.
"We'll do what we need to do," O'Neill said.
"And more," Leia said.
"Together we'll win," Luke said firmly.
"Indeed," Teal'c said with a slight grin. "Victory, Luke Skywalker."
"Victory, Teal'c." Luke raised a fist as he ran.
"Victory. 'Indeed,'" Cam said, and he dashed off with his friend.
"Needs more bass," Daniel muttered behind him.
The Star-Child, weakening more swiftly than before, watched as the Rebel pilots took to space.
Combining these two galaxies was his greatest work yett.
But as he thought this, his head drooped.
Although the Rebel Alliance had their pilots train in both types of ships, Rebel pilots generally stuck to their X-wing fighters and Stargate Command pilots stuck to their Goa'uld fighter craft
So it was that Luke took to the battle in his trusty X-wing and Cam in his Goa'uld fighter.
As usual, when they took on the Star Destroyers and the Alkesh ships, they had a number of things to say.
"Cam, I'm going up close with a Star Destroyer."
"Luke, I don't mean to sound like Biggs, but will you be able to pull out in time?" Cam attempted an impersonation of Luke's childhood friend from Tatooine.
From his cockpit, Luke grinned, and on his com Cam could hear a light laugh.
"You sound nothing like Biggs. But don't worry, Cam. Like I told Biggs down on Naboo, it'll be just like Beggars Canyon back home."
"You always say that. When you going to get some new material, Luke?"
"When I can, Cam."
Cam was amazed that Luke could sound so calm with Biggs, Wedge and other friends taking on the Star Destroyers, Alkesh ships, gliders and TIE fighters. He'd been worried enoutgh when Wedge and Biggs pulled out at the First Death Star. (And how many Death Stars were there going to be? Even Ba'al had one for a while. Now he had a roving Sphere to take out Rebel ships while he built more Death Spheres. Sheesh!) With so much going on, it could be a challenge to remain calm and steady.
But Cam knew that's how a pilot was. Plus, Luke was a Jedi, and those guys were super-calm. And tough, too. In some ways, Luke had more mojo than even Teal'c had. Indeed.
"Stay on course, Cam. We're doing great."
"Roger that, Luke. Maybe after we take our the Empire and the Goa'uld we can shoot some womp rats with a T-16 and head for Toshi Station."
Another little laugh from Luke along with the sound of weapons firing and something blowing up.
"Will do, Cam. If my Uncle Owen lets me. Or Colonel O'Neill. Or Han," Luke said. "Or my sister.. Or Yoda."
"I don't think Yoda would mind," Cam said. "But Leia? I don't know. But I do know this: you've earned a break."
"We all have."
When the two of them blasted the control tower of the Star Destroyer, it sent the giant white ship spiraling out of control. When the ship turned vertical, it crashed into the surface of Ba'al's Death Sphere. The resulting explosion destroyed the Sphere.
"And Death Sphere is out," Cam reported triumphantly over the radio. This was combined with cheering from the other pilots.
"Nice work, Cam."
"Affirmatory on that, Luke. I got to say: this is so much better than being stranded out in space the way Teal'c and Colonel O'Neill were."
"It's better than hanging upside down in the cave of a Wampa."
"Or being frozen in carbonite. Han ever completely get over that?"
"He's doing okay. You know Han."
When the two pilots touched down, their friends ran out to them but the pilots didn't get a lot of back-slapping or Princess Leia embracing them or Luke cackling with laughter as he shouted something that sounded like "Carrie!"
Han did, however, tousle Luke's hair.
"Looks like you get all the credit and take all the reward on this one, kid."
"That never gets old, Han." Cam held up a warning finger. "Don't touch the hair." He noted O'Neill and the gang gathered around which included Chewbacca making his mournful growling noises. "Looks like the band's all back together."
O'Neill was uncharacteristically serious. "Carter's located the center of the disturbance."
"So much for a rest," Luke said.
"We're headed for Mos Eisley."
"Don't suppose we could stop for a few drinks," Cam said.
"Not likely," Han said.
"You won't be alone," Ba'al said with Darth Vader next to him.
"Oh, great," Cam groaned.
"Ah, yes," O'Neill said. "As you can see, we picked up some new friends."
"At least they're from our galaxy. No offense, Captain Kirk."
"None taken."
"Still, not our favorite people," O'Neill said. "And they're none too happy about you two taking out their little death sphere, I can tell you that."
"Should be fun then," Cam said.
"A lot of fun," Leia said drily. Chewie made more of those mournful noises, shaking his head back and forth as he did.
Vader waved a gloved fist. "You shall go down to defeat, Stargate Command Rebels!"
"Ah, yes. On that happy note, we're out of here."