Thank you once again for choosing to read this new chapter :)
Chapter Six: Finally
Whenever Tashigi heard unknown steps coming towards her cell, her body went stiff. Fear would start to rush through her veins and her breathing became frantic.
Tashigi knew exactly how Smoker's heavy steps sounded on the bare stone floors and her body never put her in this state of agony when he came to visit.
But she never knew who Tanaka would send to get her in his torture chamber and he never sent the same person twice, so every new sound of steps sent her in excruciating anxiety.
Tashigi had long lost any feeling for time, she never knew if it was day or night or which exact time of the day it was. Her meals came so irregularly that they were also no indication for anything.
Even her pickups by Tanaka's soldiers didn't help her to get a feeling for the passing time. Sometimes it felt as if he hadn't tortured her in days and sometimes it felt like he picked her up twice a day.
She never asked Smoker how much time she had already spent in this cell and he never told her. However, the worry in his hazel eyes got more prominent with each visit.
Whenever Tashigi wasn't Tanaka's doll to play with, she vegetated in her cell. No longer was she able to move without any pain and even if she hadn't been in pain all the time, her body was too weak anyway and she was aware that she had lost a shit ton of weight: her clothes, stained with dirt, blood, and even vomit, hung loose on her body.
But no matter how much it would hurt and no matter how much of her remaining little strength it would take, there was one thing Tashigi needed to do before whoever was coming towards her cell arrived:
hide the fresh water bottle Kara had brought her a while ago.
That girl was too precious for her good but Tashigi was so thankful for every piece of food or every bottle of water Kara secretly gave her.
Of course, the Ensign had been right and Tanaka's methods had become more brutal after Smoker got word about the other Vice-Admiral's idea to rape Tashigi.
It was worth it though. Whenever she was in the hands of Tanaka now, there was always a second Vice-Admiral from another unit in the room too. She never had to fear a sexual assault anymore.
And while Smoker still tried to press his superiors for Tanaka's punishment, Tashigi expected the other man to weasel his way out of a punishment somehow.
"Hina didn't think that you were dumb enough to throw your life away. For a stupid man."
Tashigis's head jerked around, sending a jolt of pain through her body in the process.
"Rear Admiral Hina," Tashigi got out, surprised that she still had an audible voice.
"Smoker told Hina what happened and is still happening. So Hina came to see it for herself," the Rear Admiral explained with a critical look at Tashigi.
"I wish you hadn't come."
"Shut up. Hina does whatever she wants to do. Hina doesn't follow anybody's wishes."
With a little smile on her lips, Tashigi tried to place herself in a less embarrassing position. Even battered and bruised she still had some pride left in her and at least wanted to sit during Hina's visit.
And not lie on her bed like… an already convicted felon.
"No man can be worth the things you have to go through. The sex can't be that good."
Tashigi almost had to laugh at the Rear Admiral's words.
"This isn't about Sex, Hina," she answered and got a questioning look from the older woman.
"Have you ever been in love, Hina?" Tashigi asked but continued before the woman in question had a chance to answer.
"Have you ever been so in love that your whole body grows warm whenever you think of him and it tingles everywhere? So in love, your heart is about to burst every time he touches or kisses you? That you can't live with the thought that you are the reason he could get captured and killed?"
She made a small pause to catch her breath, it had been a long time since she spoke that much. Hina simply stood in front of her cell, an unimpressed look on her face.
"Because that's what this is all about, Hina. Your true love, the love of your life. The love you would do everything for, even die. This is about the promise we gave each other a year ago. This is about keeping him a secret. He would do exactly the same for me."
"Are you sure?" Hina asked, her voice was serious but the look in her eyes told Tashigi that the older woman doubted every single spoken word.
Tashigi felt herself getting angry. It took everything in her to stand up, but she managed it. With fury in her eyes, she looked at Hina.
"Never have I've ever before. He would die for me! He would do exactly the same for me. He'd suffer the same pain, the same things that I'm suffering right now!"
Still, Hina had a reserved look in her eyes and Tashigi knew that the Rear Admiral didn't believe her. Tears ran over her face.
"He is a pirate," Hina said with a soft voice, "People like him, they don't know what love is. What love feels like. Hina is sure that he is just playing with you. Don't protect him, Tashigi. Give up and tell them his name."
Tashigi stared at Hina in disbelief.
She had been prepared to receive incomprehension and scoffs but not once had she expected to hear those words and she certainly did not expect them to hurt that much.
And that's what they did, they hurt because they were not true.
"You don't know him, Hina," Tashigi cried out.
"Hina knows enough pirates to know how they think."
"No, you don't!"
Anger and despair gave her new strength to stand but still, Tashigi had to hold onto the bars of her cell with both hands.
With ferocity in her eyes, she fixed her gaze on Hina.
"You don't know him the way I do! You don't know how gentle he can be, you don't know anything about the man he is. The love he can give, the emotions he can show. You…"
Hina raised her hand and Tashigi automatically stopped. Silence hung between them and Tashigi suspected that Hina was choosing her words carefully.
"Hina accepts that you believe in the words you said however, Hina still thinks that this stupid pirate is just playing with your feelings for whatever reasons. You are digging your own grave, Tashigi! Don't do that. Don't throw your life away. Save yourself, girl!"
Tashigi didn't answer.
Zoro would never play with her feelings like that. Never!
Not after everything they went through, not after they promised to keep each other a secret.
He loved her!
He wasn't pretending.
"Think about it," Hina said sternly, "But think about it quickly. You're running out of time."
The former navy captain did not realize that Hina left again. She was lost in a spiral of her thoughts. Giving her all to prove herself that Hina was wrong, that Zoro loved her.
Tashigi was in the middle of cursing Hina for infecting her with doubt when another set of unknown steps neared her cell and her body reacted instantly.
Cold sweat covered her back and her knuckles turned white because she grabbed the bars too tight. It felt like something strangled her and the moment she looked into the sadistic grinning face of one of Tanaka's soldiers, all strength left her and her legs were no longer able to hold her up.
Tashigi was more than glad that Kota had searched for her when she hadn't shown up to their meeting at the bar. And that he still wanted to go and grab a drink with her.
Kota and drinks were the perfect distraction of this way too chaotic day. First the fall out with Roronoa, the heartache that followed right after, and to top it all off the ridiculous conversation with her dad.
Even on her third glass of wine she still doubted that the pirate felt anything different than hate and disgust for her.
He had made that pretty clear today.
And yep, Tashigi was tipsy enough to truly admit that it hurt like hell and that she had hoped to be something more to him. But she knew how foolish this hope had been.
While she was listening to Kota's stories Tashigi gave her best to cheer herself up. She was a big girl and she would get over this heartbreak; even when she didn't know when.
She had crushes and even relationships before, though the feelings for Roronoa had always felt different from all of the others.
Deeper and more intense, since the very first time she had laid eyes on that freaking handsome idiot. It took a whole lot of self-control but she somehow managed to keep her tears at bay.
Not to imagine what would happen if she started crying in front of Kota; completely out of the blue.
"And then I asked him what his motivation for the journey was…," Kota continued seemingly unaware that Tashigi wasn't fully listening, however when she felt his hand on her thigh he instantly had her full attention.
With a smile on her lips, she brushed his hand away. Giving him the benefit of the doubt she continued to, now actively, listen to him.
Nonetheless, Tashigi soon felt his hand on her thigh for a second time.
More determined she brushed his hand away again while watching his face closely. Nothing in his expression changed though, so maybe he wasn't even aware he was touching her?
When it happened a third time she was certain that he did not do it unintentionally, on the contrary. But before Tashigi could even catch her breath to confront Kota a fist appeared out of nowhere and sent the journalist to the floor.
Zoro knew he had made a mistake as soon as he entered the bar and saw HER with HIM.
They stood at the counter, glasses in hand and way too close to each other. For Zoro's taste anyway.
He contemplated leaving but decided against it, after their conversation this afternoon she would probably ignore him all evening. Which was fine by him, if Kota would leave him alone too.
Zoro wanted nothing more than to get drunk. He chose to sit at the other side of the bar and because it was his third month on this island by now, he didn't need to order and the waitress served him a bottle of his favorite sake.
"I get another two of these," he said as soon as she sat down with the booze in front of him.
She knew him well enough to not ask any questions and instead just fulfilled his order.
Zoro's eyes found Tashigi on their own.
Even if he wanted to he couldn't have avoided it. He always made sure he could see or at least sense her; it didn't matter if she was mad at him or not and Zoro was sure that this newly formed habit would never go away again.
The swordsman knew exactly why he made sure that she was safe and sound at all times: because he loved her and even if she probably would never feel the same way for him, he would protect her whenever he needed to.
Tashigi and Kota seemed to enjoy each other's company, as always.
Kota consistently knew how to make her laugh.
Getting a smile or a happy laugh out of her came as easy to freaking Kota as breathing. Another reason Zoro couldn't stand that guy.
All Zoro ever managed to provoke from Tashigi were rage or worse tears.
Right now Tashigi threw her head back laughing, tears in her eyes and a hand on Kota's forearm.
Jealousy rushed through him and Zoro couldn't stop himself from growling silently.
When he emptied the third and last bottle he decided to leave. He could no longer stand to watch these two lovebirds flirting with each other.
His ass Tashigi would never feel more than friendship for Kota. It didn't look like that at all and maybe Quin should just go get his eyes checked if he couldn't see it.
Zoro stood up and gave Tashigi one last glance, she was now sitting on a barstool and her skirt had slipped up, probably when she had sat down.
Why is she wearing a skirt anyway?
However, that wasn't what bothered him the most.
What bothered him the most was Kota's hand on her thigh. His hand she continued to brush away and Kota always placed back on her body.
Zoro got blinded by rage and forgot his original plan to leave the bar.
He balled his fists and with two wide steps, he was at the counter. Kota seemed not to see him coming nonetheless Zoro's punch sent the journalist flying to the floor.
"Roronoa! What are you doing?" Tashigi screamed while clinging to his arm, supposedly to prevent him from punching Kota again.
"Dude," the man on the floor said while holding his bleeding nose.
"He grabbed you!" Zoro answered Tashigi's question belatedly struggling to get out of her grip.
"No, he did not!"
"Of course he did! I saw it!"
Zoro turned to look at her and froze. Tashigi was staring at him with tears in her eyes.
For the second time today.
Why did she have tears in her eyes again?
Was it because of him?
Yet again?
Why was it always because of him?
"He," Zoro tried to say while the tears ran down her face, "He touched your thigh. Over and over again. So, I thought…"
"You thought it would be a good idea to punch him?" she interrupted with a shaky voice.
"Well, yeah?" Zoro confessed, feeling unsure for the first time in forever.
Granted it hadn't been his best idea but to be fair, it hadn't been an idea and more like an instinct.
An instinct that had told him to keep her safe from this asshole and to defend what was his.
It didn't matter that Tashigi probably would never be his.
Tashigi just looked at him and Zoro realized that the whole bar had become silent. She was still crying and Zoro felt his heart break.
"There is no need for you to protect or save me. I. Am. Not. Your. Babygirl," she said as calm as she could've ever been.
The fact that she wasn't yelling at him like she usually would in a situation like this sent shivers down his whole body.
She just stood in front of him, fists clenched and still crying.
"I," he tried again but nothing more came out.
"You always ruin everything," Tashigi whispered before she turned around and left the bar.
"Well done, Zoro, well done," Kota said standing up.
And once again rage rushed through Zoro's veins.
If Kota hadn't shown up all those things wouldn't have happened.
Zoro and Tashigi would still be working together in the orphanage. They wouldn't have this hurtful fall out in the forest and Zoro surely wouldn't have said those mean things he didn't mean.
Zoro turned around to look at Kota's bloody face. His first thought was to punch him again but instead, he too left the bar and ran after Tashigi.
He caught up with her when she entered the church.
"Tashigi! Wait, I want to explain!" he yelled.
"I don't want to hear it!"
"Fuck! Tashigi!"
She suddenly spun around in the middle of the aisle and looked at him with a tear-stained face and fury in her eyes.
"No cursing in the church!"
"Sorry!" Zoro answered gladly that she had stopped, however, he was nowhere prepared for the following outburst.
"NO!" she screamed at the top of her lungs.
"YOU ARE NEVER SORRY, RORONOA! All you ever do is run around like you own this place, mocking people and hurting feelings in the process! Preferably mine! I have been nothing but nice to you even in the past few weeks. But you… You are constantly mocking me and calling me names. I don't know why you still hate me that much but I thought after we talked, that we could be…"
Her gaze left him for a few seconds and Zoro could see how hard she tried to find the right words.
His heart ached with every word out of her mouth.
This is all so wrong, he thought.
Tashigi's beautiful brown eyes found him again and she continued.
"I don't know what I thought we could be. Just leave me alone!"
Once again she turned around however before she could start to run again Zoro grabbed her by the wrist.
"I don't hate you!" he screamed at her.
He hadn't planned to scream but obviously, he had long lost control of the situation.
Tashigi wriggled in his grip.
"Let me go!"
Zoro couldn't see it because she still didn't face him, but her voice sounded like fresh tears running over her face.
"I don't hate you, Babygirl," he repeated softer this time.
"I just don't have any experience with feelings that strong. So, I do stupid things."
She stopped her resistance and looked at him over her shoulder.
"What do you mean?" Tashigi asked in a whisper.
Well, it wasn't at all how Zoro had imagined to eventually tell her but if he wouldn't do it now, there was a chance that he could lose her forever. So, he took a deep breath and said.
"I love you!"
Tashigi's eyes widened in shock, her beautiful face was still wet by all the tears but thankfully new ones were nowhere in sight.
"Wha… ?" she said and then a pleading look laid in her eyes.
"Please, don't joke about that!"
Zoro cracked a tiny smile. It was only natural for her to have doubts but what did people say?
Actions speak louder than words, right?
With a soft tug at her wrist, he pulled her around and into his chest, and then… he kissed her.
Zoro had kissed women before, not many but he had kissed. However not one of those kisses was like this one. This kiss sent shivers through every fiber of his body.
The heat was rushing through him and he angled his head to deepen the kiss. He felt Tashigi's response, felt how her hands grabbed his shirt in a tight handle and felt her opening her mouth.
And he didn't waste one second to push his tongue into her. The moment their tongues touched for the first time both of them couldn't suppress a moan
Zoro buried one hand in her dark hair, the other he put around her waist and pulled her even closer. She was so fucking perfect!
The way her body fit his and the way their joined mouths had a natural rhythm to them. As if this kiss was just one of the thousands they had already shared and not their very first one.
There were many things in this world that Zoro was unsure of but there was one thing that was as sure as the sun would rise tomorrow:
Tashigi was made for him!
The lack of air urged them to break the kiss, but neither was willing to let go. So they stood there in the middle of the aisle smiling like some young school kids and staring into each other's eyes.
"Why didn't we do this sooner?" Zoro eventually whispered now careful to not disturb the quietness of the church.
Tashigi let out a little laugh.
"You were just too stubborn, I think."
Zoro had a playful remark already on the tip of his tongue but he got interrupted.
"Oh come on! Don't tell me I fucking missed it!"
They both spun their heads around to Quintanilla, who stood in front of the altar a disappointed look on his face.
Zoro cracked another small smile and lowered his gaze back to the woman of his dreams.
Who would've thought that he would ever hear the old priest curse?
And in the church out of all places.
Tashigi, who was now blushing like a madwoman, looked him in the eyes and Zoro bent down for another kiss.
Now, that he knew that she was made for him, he would never stop kissing her.
Tashigi felt like she was in a dream.
Not because she had heard her father curse for the very first time in her entire life. But because she now sat next to Roronoa Zoro on her bed and the pirate was seemingly not willing to let go of her hand.
Not that she would complain however the whole situation was still so surreal: Everything that happened in the church after she had stormed out of the bar.
The confession, the kisses…
Did all of that really happen?
She turned her head and instantly blushed as she caught Roronoa staring at her
"You're so beautiful," he said and in the next second, he was kissing her again.
Her eyes fell shut on their own and she leaned into him.
His lips were surprisingly soft and he was so gentle. Every nerve in her body tingled and she felt things, she had never felt before.
Good things.
It felt like she had been missing something for her whole life and now she was finally complete.
"We wanted to talk," she whispered when they broke the kiss although their lips were still almost touching.
Kissing and touching him was becoming addictive but talking...
They came to her room to talk, well after Quin had hugged them both completely overjoyed and Tashigi could swear there had been tears in her father's eyes.
"Right, talk," Roronoa answered.
Tashigi could feel his breath on her face and shivers went down her spine.
Talk, they needed to talk, but where to start?
"You are not joking, are you? This is not some weird game, just so you can brag about tricking me later to your friends?" she said eventually and was not happy about how unsure her voice sounded.
Roronoa did not miss a beat to answer her question.
"I love you, Babygirl! I love you as I've never loved anyone before. It took me too damn long to realize that to risk this by playing with your feelings. Now that you are mine, you can bet on it that I'm not willing to ever lose you again. I swear on Wado Ichimonji that I'm not playing with you nor do I ever plan to!"
He now held her face in both hands and looked at her firmly.
Tashigi gaped at him, did he swear on Wado?
Goosebumps all over her body and tears in her eyes she grasped the whole meaning of this.
If he swore on his dead best friend's sword there was no way he was lying to her. Roronoa Zoro might be a pirate but he was also a man of honor.
And Wado meant way too much for him to swear on it easily. So, in conclusion, that meant he was in love with her!
"Did I say something wrong?" Roronoa asked now a concerned look on his face.
Tashigi smiled at him while she wiped the tears away.
"You didn't. You said all the right things. I am still overwhelmed by all of this," she answered.
The green-haired man smiled too and let himself fall back on her bed. And since he still had her face in her hands he pulled her along. She was now halfway laying on his chest, the blush stronger than ever before, and slowly but surely Tashigi got the impression that blushing was now part of her everyday life.
Nevertheless, she relaxed onto him and marveled at the feeling of Roronoa combing his fingers through her hair.
"I like that you're letting it grow," he said after some time.
Tashigi laughed and answered.
"It wasn't intentional. I just forgot to cut it."
The pirate laughed too.
"I like it anyway. It suits you."
"Thank you."
Again they were silent for a short time and then Tashigi probed herself on his chest and looked at Roronoa lost in thought.
"The things you said in the forest this afternoon…" she started but couldn't continue because truth be told, it still hurt.
A pained expression appeared on Roronoa's face and a heavy sigh escaped his throat.
"Fuck. I regret those the moment they came out of my mouth."
"Why did you say them then?" she asked.
"Defense mechanism? Hurt feelings? I was sure that you and me, we could never be more than enemies. And yet here we are."
A sad smile made its way on Tashigi's lips.
"Someone hurt your feelings, huh? Dad says you're jealous because of Kota."
A blushing Roronoa was not something Tashigi ever expected to see but she could get used to it. He kinda looked cute with those rosy cheeks.
"I'm not jealous," he was quick to answer.
"Are you sure?"
Of course, the teasing tone of her voice was on purpose.
Suddenly he grabbed her even tighter and before she could think of any possibility he had planned, Roronoa had already spun them around and was now laying on top of her.
"Don't make me say it," he said.
His lips were almost touching hers and it drove her crazy that he wasn't kissing her.
She clasped her hands behind his neck and smiled up to him.
It wasn't his full weight laying on her body and at another time she probably would be offended and would believe that he thought she was weak. But those times were over now, he loved her and his body fit perfectly onto hers.
"Admit it. Say it!" she demanded, forcing him once again to sigh.
"Okay! You win. I was jealous. But I didn't know it until Quin pointed it out."
"Got lost in your feelings, right?" she could not stop herself from saying that.
Tashigi expected a teasing answer but Zoro just buried his face in the crook of her neck.
She did not mind it, she liked the feeling of his breath on her skin and she liked to brush his hair with her fingers.
"Hey Zoro," she said after quite some time.
"Hmm?" he hummed in response and she felt the vibration of his voice in her whole body.
"I am sorry."
Zoro lifted his head and looked at her confused but she continued before he could ask any questions.
"I am sorry for every mean thing I ever said to you. I apologize for thinking even meaner things just because you're a pirate. And I am sorry for every false accusation I made and for trying to take your swords and…"
Tashigi had planned to say so much more but she got cut off by Zoro's lips on hers.
Compared to the others it was just a short kiss probably just to silence her and that was why she now pouted at Zoro's smiling face.
"You're way too good for this world," he said while brushing his fingers over her face.
"I was in the middle of apologizing!" she countered.
"I know that but I don't need any apologies from you, Babygirl. And I don't want any."
"But I said so many unreasonable things to you!" she tried to argue.
"So did I but those things are in the past now. We have so much more now, so many thrilling things to look forward to. You and me… I… we are meant to be! And now that you're finally mine I won't let past things dim our light. Got it?"
Tashigi looked at him stunned.
Meant to be?
Those were words she never expected to hear from Roronoa Zoro but they felt so right!
She had tried to find words to describe the thing between them but wasn't able to. But meant to be was perfect wording!
It felt fitting and sent all kinds of emotions through her whole body.
Never before had she ever felt so loved and wanted. It was overwhelming and brought tears to her eyes.
"I love you, Zoro. I love you so much."
There was no answer from him, at least not a verbal one. However right then and there Tashigi decided she liked kissing over the talking.
"Can I stay the night?" Zoro asked hours later.
They still laid in her bed and he still wasn't willing to let go of her and she still wasn't complaining about it but him staying the night?
In her room?
In her bed?
Tashigi wasn't sure she was ready for that yet.
Zoro seemed to sense her mood and said.
"I don't mean staying in terms of having sex, Babygirl. I just want to be with you and hold your hand while falling asleep."
She looked up at him smiling.
"You are a romantic one, are you?"
"Fuck off! Can I stay or not?"
"Of course you can."
"Kota! Kota, wait! Please!"
Tashigi was out of breath as soon as she reached Kota down at the port.
She had planned to talk to him about what had happened at the bar the evening before but as she reached his rooms Quin had told her that the journalist was on his way to leave the island.
Now Kota stood in front of her and looked at her expectantly as she tried to catch her breath. His nose was bound but his nose and eye area had turned nice shades of blue and violet.
Thanks to Zoro's fist.
"I... wanted... to... talk to you," she got out and straightened.
"No need to, Tashi," he answered.
"But..."
"Don't worry. Zoro was drunk and emotions were running high even before that. It's all good."
Something in his smile made her feel uneasy but she couldn't tell why.
"Are you sure? He punched you after all..."
Kota stood in front of her and laid a hand on her shoulder.
"Don't worry too much, Tashi. It's not the first time I got punched."
A small smile spread on her lips.
"Ehm... Kota. One more thing."
"I won't tell anyone that Roronoa Zoro permanently lives on Silver Ait. I may be a journalist but I still have my honor."
"Thank you!"
They shared one last smile and then Tashigi watched Kota sail away. Her heart was so much lighter now.
"So did your plan work?" Smoker asked as soon as Hina entered his quarter.
"No. Tashigi is as stubborn as can be. She got angry at Hina but didn't flinch. Hina never saw someone believe this hard in their relationship."
"Told you," Smoker answered with a sigh.
If Tashigi's life freshwater wouldn't be on the line he may even admire her for her trust in her relationship.
Secretly that means.
It was fascinating anyway, never before had Smoker seen her so determined to keep silent.
"Hina thinks you know who this mysterious boyfriend is," said the woman next to him.
"I have a suspicion but no evidence."
"You know her the best! Confront her! Lie to her! Tell her you know who he is and that you gonna tell Chiba."
Smoker looked at the Rear Admiral. This thought had crossed his mind so many times in the last few weeks.
He was sure he knew who his former Captain's boyfriend was there was just one thing.
"She would never forgive me. It would be betrayal in her eyes."
"But at least she would be alive!" Hina said.
"You have the power to save her. Who cares if she would feel betrayed by you? Not the Smoker Hina knows."
Hina was right and he knew that and he shouldn't give a damn about if Tashigi would talk to him ever again.
If he played his cards right he could save her.
A knock on the door led his gaze to the now-opening entrance.
"Admiral Chiba," Smoker and Hina saluted at the same time.
Chiba took his time and Smoker didn't like the look of pity in his superior's eyes.
"I am here to inform you that the judges came to a decision. They will announce it in one of the smaller courtrooms in twenty minutes."
Smoker tried hard to swallow the lump in his throat.
It was too late.
He was too late!
The look on Chiba's face told Smoker everything he needed to know and he felt like someone just ripped his heart out.