"Nice place you got here."
"Thanks! We made it ourselves!"
Reimu took the tea and umeboshi-filled onigiri with pleasure. She was a guest in the house of the people who had requested her presence, so a little bit of hospitality was to be expected. She took a sip from the warm mug, feeling the warm liquid sipping down her throat, warming her body temperature after being exposed to the chilly elements raging outside.
"I heard you liked black tea," Naruto said from his spot across from her, "we don't really eat snacks, us being old men, but the teme can make some damn good rice balls."
Reimu gave the man a pointed look, setting down the mug back on the table. "Who told you that?"
"Ah, Keine-sensei told me."
"...Sensei?"
The blonde shrugged his shoulders. "Hey, she might not be my teacher but she is still a teacher." He then propped his chin on his palm, resting his elbow on the table next to his refreshments. "And, as far as I'm concerned, good teachers like her deserve my respect."
"Right."
The Shrine Maiden of Paradise reminded herself that these two men had been living here for nearly a month now; that's usually more than enough time for them to familiarize themselves with their surroundings and getting to know some of the important people that lived here. The young woman asserted herself. She was not here to just chat over tea and refreshments, although that's probably what they were going to be doing mostly.
"So," Reimu started blandly, "let's just get right to the reason why I'm here, shall we?"
"Sure," Naruto replied casually. He turned his head in the direction of the kitchen where his friend was at. "Oi teme! C'mere already, the miko-chan wants to talk to us!"
Reimu took one more sip from her mug, relishing in the drink that she did not have to work for. Not long after, the second owner of the house finally joined them on the table.
"Listen up, even though I've been doing this for my whole life, I still won't get used to seeing new faces popping up out of the blue. The reason being every time someone new pops up around here I have to beat them up black and blue after they did something stupid like messing up the weather, stealing an entire season, or replacing the moon with a fake one."
Both men blinked several times after hearing the list of events Reimu just said.
"Now, it might sound counter-productive for the Hakurei Shrine Maiden to say this, but if you have to make a mess: at least wait until winter's over." The expression on the young woman's face could be described as desperate as if she was willing to beg on her knees. "At least that way I don't have to deal with you and the cold at the same time."
Naruto chuckled, uncertain of what to feel after hearing Reimu's words. "R-Right…"
Reimu coughed to her fist. "That's not all, though." Her voice took a more serious tone. "You might've noticed that despite Gensokyo being a – mostly – Youkai populated place, it's a wonder how the human population managed to prosper after all this time."
Sasuke had to admit, he too had been wondering about that ever since they first visited the human village. His and Naruto's meeting with the shrine maiden after catching her in the middle of… uh… eating lunch had to be cut short due to her insisting on delivering them directly to the village. As a result, she didn't have the time to properly explain things to them. Hence why she's here now, to catch them up to speed.
"It's because everyone – mostly – here abides in something we call the Spell Card Rules."
"I've… heard that term being passed around before," Naruto recalled. He wasn't sure from who, though.
"Right." Reimu glared at the man, presumably from being interrupted, much to the blonde's embarrassment. "As I was saying… it's a system I developed not so long ago to deal with people like you two." She emphasized their presence almost with stress.
"To make things simpler to understand, it's a way to maintain order and balance around here. We've long accepted that it's futile trying to stop two people from butting heads when settling a dispute, so we decided that if two idiots are going to butt heads, they might as well do it in a way that won't completely level the landscape or something."
Both men felt uneasy after hearing that last remark.
The shrine maiden reached into one of her magnificent sleeves, pulling out two pamphlets that she slid across the table for the two men to read.
"Read that," Reimu said after taking a sip from her mug, "understand it, and if you still have questions, don't hesitate to visit the shrine." She paused while looking into the content of her mug. "Just make sure you bring the tea leaves for this type of tea."
Keine warned them about how, er, blunt the Hakurei Shrine Maiden could be. They just didn't expect her to be this blunt.
"Ah, I must warn you though, my roommates can be quite eccentric whenever they meet new people. So, if you don't mind dealing with people like that, you're welcome to visit." She paused, carefully thinking of what to say next. "Just don't visit every day, unless you plan on making a donation."
Very blunt indeed…
"Hmmm… these are good," Reimu commented after taking a bite of the rice balls that had been served to her.
She began digging into the meal in a pace and manner that made both men unable to look away from. After finishing the meal, the shrine maiden let out a sigh of satisfaction.
She then looked at the barely touched plate of rice balls on Naruto's side of the table. "Say… you think I can have some more of that for the road?"
After quickly preparing several more servings of rice balls – along with several tea bags – and wrapping them up for the shrine maiden to take home, the two Sages then watched the quickly disappearing form of said shrine maiden as she flew through the sky with an uncharacteristic smile on her face. They had pretty much given her their meal for tomorrow morning, but considering that they first saw her feasting upon a fistful worth of grasshoppers when they first met her, they wouldn't mind missing out on breakfast every now and then. Besides, their status as a Sage made their metabolism and sense of hunger all different than that of a human's.
"Ne, teme…"
"Hm?"
"Next time, we'll visit her."
"Hm."
"...and we'll bring food."
"Hm."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold up!"
Sasuke was beginning to fear that years of living in exile and as a hermit would inevitably dull his senses. Thankfully, it didn't seem to be that way when living in Gensokyo.
This time, a legitimate intruder had intruded upon their dwelling. He managed to catch them off guard, which was not a very hard thing to do considering that the intruder had a very different idea of what stealth meant than him.
"N-Now, now, it ain't exactly hospitable for the host of the house to treat their guests like this, z-ze?" chuckled the intruder, the tip of his sword a hair's breadth away from the skin of her throat.
"...it's not exactly proper for someone to enter another person's property, especially without having been invited either."
"Hahaha…" The black-white-clad intruder had to be careful not to make any sudden movements, in fear of being impaled by her host's vorpal blade. "Funny thing about that, ya' see, I was at the door but no one was answering, so I thought I'd let myself in…"
Sasuke arched an eyebrow, his arm still steady with the blade. "A liar too?" he asked with a hint of amusement. "Next thing you will tell me is that you weren't planning on stealing any of our belongings."
"Oh, I would never!"
She totally would. That settled it. Sasuke inched his blade away from the girl's throat, beginning to start taking her uninvited presence in his house seriously. He wasn't about to that, however, since the door to the house suddenly opened revealing a familiar-looking blonde and… an unfamiliar one?
"See?" The unfamiliar blonde said in a manner that conveyed her disappointment clearly. "I told you she'd be here."
"Hm," the blonde Sasuke was familiar with squinted his blue eyes, staring at the trespasser, "so that's what that presence was I felt earlier. Good thing the teme's home, then."
Sasuke watched as the unfamiliar blonde woman, the one who came along with his friend, sighed. "I'd start frisking her if I were you." She then gave the intruder, who was also a blonde, a disapproving glare. "Her hands are about as quick as her tendency to cause unmitigated property damage."
"Oi!" The intruder barked; definitely, she didn't take that comment too kindly. She gave the other blonde woman a look of urgency, which made sense considering that she was still in range of Sasuke's blade. "You see yer friend in a pickle and you're just gonna stand there and watch her brine?"
"Normally, I'd rather not," the most sensible one out of the two haughtily retorted, her arms crossed below her bust, "but having to pull your hind out of hot water – or saltwater as you've said – is quite boring after I've done it for the first twentieth time."
"Oh, come on Alice, tell this guy to point his sword away from me, ze!"
Sasuke, who had withdrawn his sword, gave his friend a look. A look that the blonde returned, but rather than saying anything, he gestured towards the living area with a nudge of his head. Which caused Sasuke to sigh. She's a guest after all. It didn't take a long time for them to get situated in the living room. Teas were served, but no snacks as those had been generously 'donated' to a certain shrine maiden who lived east of where they're located. Still, it seemed that their guest did not mind only having a warm mug of tea. Emphasis on the warm.
"Whew!" The one who was wearing that ridiculously large pointed hat found it proper to express her satisfaction after taking a sip from her mug. She had a grin on her face, one that Sasuke noted was eerily similar to his friend's. "Nothing's better than a warm cuppa in this frigid weather!"
Sasuke's onyx orbs squinted, judging the previously deemed intruder without saying anything. Naruto, on the other hand, could tell that his friend was a bit peeved that someone managed to sneak into the house properly. But, for both of their sake, he decided not to say anything.
"So," the short-haired, doll-faced woman began, "once again, I'd like to apologize for my friend's… less-than-legal antics."
"No harm was done," Naruto told her, taking a sip from his own mug.
"'No harm was done' my ass," the witch muttered under her breath, "think about my reputation, what will the others say if they know I got caught off guard by an old man?"
The former avenger's eyes squinted even more.
"And just because you said that, I'll make sure they find out." remarked the woman with the bob cut, hiding a smirk beneath her mug.
Sasuke shook his head. He turned to his friend, speaking with his eyes. Naruto caught this and decided he'd do his friend a favor and save him from having to sit down and deal with three blondes at the same time.
"Right, so, teme, this here is Alice Margatroid-san."
The blonde with the short hair gave a short and curt nod, something that Sasuke could respect. Which wasn't hard, seeing as she didn't sneak into his home like her friend.
"And the one who helped herself inside our house is Kirisame Marisa-chan," the girl had the audacity to wink at him, "take it easy on her, you sour-faced bastard." The Uchiha gave a non-committal grunt at the insult, shrugging it off easily.
"I met Alice-san yesterday at the village and learned that she's a puppeteer."
Sasuke showed no outward reaction, but he'd known the dobe long enough to know that there's more to her than that.
"Think Sasori, but like, with Kaguya level of control."
Now, that got Sasuke's attention.
"Thank you for the introduction, Naruto-san, but I'll take it from here." The whiskered blonde gave her a 'no sweat' gesture. "Yes, I'm a puppeteer. I was fairly surprised that Naruto-san was familiar with the term in a way that is closer to what I consider it as. I half expected him to ask me to perform for his child's birthday party or something similar, but imagine my surprise when he asked whether or not I could create a functioning right arm for a dear friend of his."
"O-Oi, I didn't say sumthin' like 'dear'!"
Ignoring what her fellow blonde said, Alice continued speaking, "it was also when I realized that the two of you are the very same newcomers that were featured on the front page of a certain tengu's newspaper."
"Yeah, speaking of that," the witch-themed blonde spoke up, interjecting the conversation, "she never mentioned about ya'll having a house so near to where we're living." She then began taking the moment to appreciate the interior. "Nice place, I have to say. Not so much in terms of… furniture, unfortunately."
"Unfortunately for you…"
"Now, now, what are you insinuating, Alice dear~?"
"Call me 'dear' one more time and I'll show you why I'm Gensokyo's primary consumer for gunpowder." The Seven Colored Puppeteer retorted coldly and quickly.
"So," Sasuke, looking like he'd much rather have transformed himself into a rock rather than a Sage, cut in before the conversation could get even more off-topic, "why is she here?" He asked dryly, gesturing at the used-to-be intruder with his thumb.
Alice cupped her round chin, making a sincere thoughtful expression. "You're right… why is she here?"
"Oi, oi," Marisa groaned, "don't you start giving me that treatment right now, miss-I-ran-away-from-my-mum's-home-because-I'm-old-enough-to-live-on-my-own."
Alice directed a glare at her fellow magician. "You do realize that that title applies to you too, right? Or should I visit a certain secondhand shop in the village and tell them that a certain daughter of theirs has been-"
"Okay, okay!" Naruto, who had been watching the exchange silently all this time, got to see the witch's face turn beet red, Looks like whatever implication Alice had over her was far too threatening for her. "...I was bored and decided to tag along, you can't blame me. They're limiting access in and out of the village, it's getting harder and harder to sneak in each day. Can't even visit that Dango shop… I swear, the next time they put restrictions where I can or cannot go, I'll blast them away with my magic. I promise."
"Well," Naruto said, "you're free to visit from time to time, just make sure you're actually invited the next time you do so."
Marisa gave Naruto an eerily familiar grin. "Now, that, I can't promise."
Sighing, Sasuke regretted that his training with the snakes didn't turn him into a statue.
A bit longer than usual, mostly because I really enjoy the banter between those four. Three, if you're not counting Sasuke. Kudos to those of you who predicted correctly.
The next chapter will also feature a new set of characters, so, do your best if you missed the mark on this chapter.