Sometimes my time management is better than I expect! We'll talk at the bottom!

Chapter 6

Christian

My heart is racing like I've just run a marathon.

Well, mission accomplished. You really lost her.

I blindly scramble to my feet and find myself heading to the garage. I have to get out of here. On autopilot, I get into my R8.

I'm not out of the gates thirty seconds when my Bluetooth connection flashes Taylor's name on the screen. If I don't answer him now, I know he won't leave me alone, so I press the green phone. "Not fucking now, Taylor," I growl.

"Sir, it's not advisable for you to go off on your own. I at least need to know where you're going."

"Well, then, track the fucking car and leave me alone!" I hang up and pull over, my breathing and heart rate still wild. Where the hell am I going?

I can't go to Bellevue. I've been giving both my parents the cold shoulder as well and they don't need to deal with the aftermath of my stupidity. I don't relish the thought of going to Elliot and Kate's. They're dealing with sleep training their four-month-old son. That I've only ever seen on FaceTime. And they probably both hate my guts too. That really only leaves one viable option.

I pull back onto the road and speed off in the direction of Mia's apartment downtown.

I've been an equal opportunity family-ignorer for the last year or so, but if anyone will at least give me the time of day after all the shit I've put them through, it's her. I just hope fucking Kavanaugh isn't sleeping over. I don't need that shit in my head.

I type in the code and pull into the garage of Mia's building. It's only just after 9, so I know she'll be awake. My nerves climbs right along with the elevator as I approach her floor. I take a deep breath and knock.

"Coming!" Mia calls. She throws open the door, wearing a pink silk sleeping set and with her hair wrapped in a towel. Her jaw drops when she sees me. "Christian?"

"Mia. I'm sorry. I didn't know where else to go."

Her brows knit together, but she steps aside and gestures for me to come in. She appraises me with her hands on her hips as we stand in her little foyer. "Well, I can understand why you didn't go to Elliot's. Kate is going to strangle you."

I sink onto the bench next to her entryway. "I know, Mia. I know I completely fucked up, but it looks like I've lost Ana for good now." My voice cracks as I say her name.

Mia scoffs. I look up at her and her face is laced with disapproval. "Well, what the hell did you expect? I wouldn't forgive cheating either."

Excuse me, what?

"Cheating? What? What the fuck are you talking about, Mia? I've never cheated on Ana." It's the one fucking thing I haven't done.

"Christian, I saw the photos. Please don't lie to me."

"What goddamn photos?!" I yell. What the hell is happening right now?

Mia slips her phone out of her pocket, taps the screen a few times, then hands it to me. My stomach rolls as I read the latest headline from the Seattle Nooz.

Mr. Grey Bangs Brunette Lookalike While Mrs. Grey Plays in Park with Children

"What the fuck?!" I nearly crack her screen with the force I use scrolling down to read.

Well, it looks like there's trouble in paradise for the King and Queen of Seattle. Christian Grey has been doing a lot of traveling lately, presumably for his initiatives to make Grey Enterprises Holdings more environmentally friendly (which we love), but it looks like that might not be the only reason he's been absent from the home front.

A woman identified as GEH employee Lena Catton was seen being escorted out of Grey House this afternoon by Grey's personal security, and we hate to be the ones to tell you, but her shirt was still half off. Meanwhile, Anastasia Grey (née Steele) was photographed spending the afternoon at the playground with her children, Theodore Grey, 4, and Phoebe Grey, 2.

It looks like we might be approaching the dissolution of what is arguably Christian Grey's biggest merger to date. We sincerely hope Anastasia has a friend to lean on tonight, and if she's ready, we have a few numbers we might be able to slip her.

I drop Mia's phone onto the floor and barely hear her protests. I wrench mine out of my pocket. "Welch. I need the CCTV from my office today from noon to 1:30. As fast as you can get it." I hang up without waiting for a response. "Mia, this is not what it looks like. I know I look like the biggest fuck-up in the world right now, but this honestly isn't what happened."

Mia's brows knit together again, this time in confusion. She sighs, taking my arm and leading me further into the apartment. She pulls me down next to her on her pink, plush couch. "Start talking."

"Oh, Christian." Mia's eyes are filled with tears as she shakes her head. "God, this is such a mess."

I drop my head into my hands and slump forward. "I know," I whisper. "It's all my fault. And now I don't know how to fix it. She wants to separate, Mia."

She rubs my arm. "Well… what if that's not such a bad idea?"

I bolt upright, looking at her incredulously. "No. Absolutely not."

"Christian, just listen." She gives me a pointed shut-up-and-don't-interrupt-me look. "Have you met Ana? She doesn't like to be tied down." Well, actually… I suppress my ironic scoff and she continues. "If you try to force her to stay with you right now, at a time when she's clearly unhappy, you're only going to ruin your chances with her even more than you already have. Maybe what you both need is time. Time for her to process and forgive, and time for you to work on yourself and make sure this doesn't happen to her or your kids again. I mean, I honestly think she's right. Maybe taking some time to just be co-parents would be good for you."

"I can't lose her, Mia. I can't…" I moan.

"Hey. Separation isn't divorce. It's just a little break. There's every chance that your marriage could be back on track after this. But either way, I really don't think refusing to do the one thing she's asked of you is going to help."

"So you think I should sign the papers and pledge to live away from my wife for at least the next three months?" I spit.

Mia raises one eyebrow. "Well, to be fair, you've done that voluntarily for the last year or so, against her will. This time, you'd be doing it at her request. Showing her that you respect what she wants and not twisting her arm and trying to control her decisions. Focusing on bettering yourself and being a father. Maybe then, Ana will start to come around."

I sigh heavily. My baby sister is making some frustratingly sound points. I stand up and head back towards the foyer.

"Where are you going?" Mia calls.

"To sign my separation papers. To finally put Ana's wishes first." I smile sadly. "Thank you, Mimi." I wrap my arms around her.

She hugs me back fiercely. "I love you, Christian. I'm with you every step of the way. And I love you and Ana together, but no matter what, you'll always be family. You have two gorgeous kids. You'll never really lose her."

I try to push away the bleak thought of living in a world where Ana is no longer my wife and simply nod.

By the time I pull back through the gates, it's a little past midnight. I see Kate's car in front of the house. Just fucking perfect.

I park in Gail and Jason's driveway and make the trek back up to the house on foot. Slipping in through the garage, I return to the great room where I left the discarded papers.

Taking a deep breath, I sign my life and my love away.

I leave the papers face up on the table, with the pen angled neatly next to them. I move back out into the crisp night air, this time out the front door, setting a reminder on my phone on the way back to the car.

Call Flynn in the morning.

I will get her back.

A/N: Phew. Everybody breathing? A lot happening here lately! I know that last chapter was probably difficult for a lot of you to read, but I'm happy that most of you understand that Ana feels like she's at the end of her rope. I've read a lot of stories where it seems like Christian just does whatever he wants and Ana just takes it no matter what. That is never the impression I got from her character, especially now that she's a mother and she's older.

A couple of things I want to address in guest reviews that I can't reply to: someone took issue with the wording of the separation agreement, but I actually got that as a template from a friend who is a family law attorney. I generally try to outsource on things I don't know much about. I only changed a few things to represent their characters better, but they said the language of separation agreements is typically more casual than a formal divorce because it's more for the couple than the state.

A lot of you seem concerned because Ana is expecting to divorce. Of course she is! She's fully believed that Christian doesn't care about her for the last year, and now suddenly she gets this bombshell dropped on her that this was all some long con. She feels like she doesn't even know him anymore. But let's remember some of Mia's words today: separation isn't divorce. And does anyone really think for one second that Christian isn't going to fight for Ana?

There is also the impression from some of you that Christian needs a different therapist than Flynn. I don't actually agree with that. I've quit therapy before when I wasn't ready to change and then returned to the same therapist with amazing results. A lot of it has to do with the willingness, plus Christian trying to find a new therapist and explaining his history of sexual abuse, BDSM, haphephobia, and what's happening now sounds super overwhelming as a patient.

Finally, I don't plan on doing every scene that Christian and Ana are in together from both POVs. That was just to set the initial tone and emphasize how fully not on the same page they are. So from now on, scenes with them together are unlikely to be repeated. This would be an absurdly long story if I did that every time.

See you soon!