Summer of 2012

When Sakura and Itachi fight, they fight dirty.

It begins when Itachi asks out their classmate, Samui. She's a blonde babe with a short temper, and cold steel blue eyes. Sakura is forced to question whether Itachi really does prefer blonde girls. Samui's twin brother, Atsui, though, is the epitome of Zen. And when Itachi starts dating his sister, Atsui decides to move to their lunch table with his friends.

Which also includes Choujuro.

Sakura is sitting between Ino and Shikamaru during lunch – since Itachi is obviously cuddled up with Samui across from her – Choujuro makes this huge deal about getting up and asking Shikamaru to move.

"I want to talk to Sakura about something," he explains, blushing slightly.

Shikamaru shrugs, gathers his food, and exchanges his seat.

"Hey," Choujuro smiles at her. "So, you and Uchiha didn't happen."

Sakura feels Ino turn to them, but tries to ignore her. Choujuro is at least taking care to keep his voice low. But that also means that he has to lean down over her a little.

Sakura shrugs dismissively. "I told you already. There's nothing between us."

Which is a big fat lie, she believes. Granted, there is nothing romantic between them but it's Itachi and Itachi means … something … to her.

"Alright," Choujuro chuckles. "So does that mean I have a chance?"

Sakura blinks up at him in surprise. "Still?" she laughs nervously. "That was two years ago."

Choujuro blushes harder. "I know. But we've been talking a little recently, even though if it's because of Samui and … everything. I figured what's the harm?"

"Oh my god," Ino suddenly says from Sakura's other side. "Are you serious? Sakura, you conniving little thing!"

"Wait what?"

Sakura finds herself now the focus of the table. Naturally, reflexively, automatically, she seeks out Itachi and he's staring back, puzzled and amused and curious.

"What's the matter?" he calls out.

"Ino," Sakura hisses at her friend.

But Ino merely points her finger back. "No, no, no. I know I heard you both right. Choujuro and Sakura! Can you guys believe it?"

Atsui barks out a loud laugh. "Yes!" he exclaims. "Oh god, he's had a crush on Haruno since forever!"

"I swear, man!" Tomaru joins in. "Haruno, you really made him wait."

"Choujuro!" Sakura turns to him instead, pleading. "Can you please tell your friends to stop? Guys, I didn't say anything. There's nothing here, okay?"

"Really?" Choujuro questions with a fallen face, not bothering to keep his voice low anymore. "Still, Sakura? Even Itachi is dating someone else now."

Sakura sucks in a sharp breath, slowly facing Itachi. He's lost all amusement. His gaze is hard and serious, and Sakura feels her stomach churning. This is bad. This is very bad.

Now everyone's going to know how she feels. Itachi is going to know how she feels.

Her heart is hammering inside her chest. She can feel Temari and Shikamaru watching her closely, but it feels impossible to look away from Itachi.

"He just means …" she stumbles through. "He thought something – between you and me. I told him there isn't anything. I don't know," she clears her throat. "I don't know why he said that."

Silence.

"You told him there isn't?" Itachi says in the stillness, his body stiff and unforgiving. He's clearly holding hands with Samui under the table, and that realisation drives Sakura through her next words.

"Yes. Because there isn't."

"Right," he agrees in the same hard tone. "So you and Choujuro? Since when?"

Sakura manages to shake her head slightly, rigidly, firmly. "No. He'd just … he told me …"

"That he likes you," he states ruthlessly.

"Yes. That was two years ago, though."

Itachi's eyes narrow dangerously. "That time when I asked you. And you lied to me."

Sakura raises her chin in defiance. "It wasn't a big deal."

"It was a big deal. Friends don't lie to each other."

"This lie wasn't a big one."

"There shouldn't be lies, Haruno," he states and her name from his lips feel wrong for the first time ever. She suddenly feels cold. "What else have you lied about?"

Shikamaru intervenes. "Itachi. Chill. You're blowing this out of proportion."

Itachi doesn't even turn to him. "What else, Haruno?"

Sakura gets to her feet. "You know what, Uchiha? I don't have to sit here and listen to this. So I'm going to leave."

Temari, Ino, and Choujuro quickly protest, but Sakura's blood is boiling. How dare he use that tone with her? How dare he ask her that? As though Sakura has lied to him many times. As though Sakura doesn't value their friendship. Itachi has no right to question – no, interrogate – her in that manner. And she refuses to be treated like that.

But before she can take more than two steps, Itachi is saying loudly.

"That's what you always do. You always run. You always leave."

Sakura stops, slowly spinning around. "Excuse me?"

Now, Itachi is standing, too. Everyone else is staring at them, uncertain and awkward. The nearby tables fall silent, too.

"You always leave," Itachi states again. "When things start to get serious, you just decide you don't want it anymore."

And Sakura feels angry now, rage coursing through her from head to toe. "I do that? Are you serious? Do you have any idea what you do?"

Itachi glares. "Really? Please! Tell me. What do I do, Sakura? Do I ignore things like you do? Do I make you feel as though you're wasting your time? Do I run back and forth between intentions just because I feel like it?"

"I've never done that!" Sakura shoots back, feeling highly offended. "When have I done any of that?"

Itachi laughs coldly. "What else have you ever done! When we became friends, Sakura, you just refused everything I asked. You wouldn't even come talk to me yourself! Why did I have to do that, every single time? I had to initiate everything! You just acted as though you entertained me because you had no other friends here!"

"Itachi, come on!" Temari interjects. "Both of you! Calm the fuck down. And talk about this in private, for fuck's sake."

"Itachi, what's going on?" Samui tugs at his arm. And she's openly glaring at Sakura.

"Yes, Itachi," Sakura snarls. "What the fuck is going on?"

Itachi flinches in shock. Sakura doesn't use curse words. Sakura never uses curse words. Let alone at him. But the shock soon gives way to cold fury.

"Nothing apart from me realising that you have taken me for granted this entire time."

"I have done no such thing," Sakura snaps. There is confusion lying beneath her anger, but she just feels too worked up to bother consoling him at this moment. "And as far as initiating goes, fine. You want me to initiate something? How about I initiate a fucking break?"

"Don't you dare-!" Itachi hisses, leaning on the table with both fists. Samui shrinks back, her hand falling limp beside her. "You're proving me right! Why can't you just pause for one goddamn second and see where things go? Why can't you fight back?"

Itachi's words feel like a slap on her face. She has fought plenty, Sakura wants to retaliate. She fights with her mother on a daily basis. She fights her insecurities all the time. She fights the urge to kiss him at least a million times in a day. She fights the instinct to do something whenever Itachi finds a new girl he is interested in.

There is silence as Sakura struggles with responding. She can't say these things to him, no matter how much it feels like ants crawling up her throat.

Instead, she takes one steadying breath. "Choujuro," she says with deceptive calmness. "Could you please clarify this mess for everyone? Have I ever shown any interest beyond friendship?"

Choujuro fidgets nervously in the sudden tension. "Um … no."

"Thank you."

Sakura locks eyes with Itachi. "There you go. Happy?" Itachi doesn't respond. Merely stares back. "Now if you will excuse me, I am going to step outside for some air."

No one stops her this time.


Winter 2020 – Present Day

Naruto and Sakura meet with the other teaching staff for lunch on Saturday.

It doesn't take long to convince everyone that action must be taken before the working environment and workplace culture starts to feel more like prison than a school. A school, which is meant to be an institution where kids feel safe enough to explore their hearts out. A school, which is meant to be liberating and celebrating innovation and changing times. A school, which by all means and purposes is supposed to be a mentoring presence in the students' lives.

As Naruto discusses various plans of action with the staff members, Sakura ponders over why her short-term plan of merely taking up the job for the time being now feels like something she was always meant to do in life. All she had wanted was to become financially independent as soon as possible, leave her childhood home for good, and pay the rent and bills for survival until she figured out a long-term plan.

So yes, she doesn't regret becoming a schoolteacher. Granted that her subject isn't "academically inclined", she still feels satisfaction when her kids progress from walking the hallways with stooping shoulders to straightening up their spines after a good lecture on body language. She feels satisfaction when the shy kid raises their hand during an activity in class, tentatively coming to the front, and then fumbling through the whole thing. She feels satisfaction when the kids leave the school at the end of the day with big smiles and enthusiastically waving her goodbye.

Sakura's own school was decent enough, she supposes. It wasn't too strict about discipline – Itachi's various pranking shenanigans were not exactly unnoticed – but it wasn't too loose, either. There were a good amount of teachers who focused more on making good humans out of them than slogging through studies. Sakura had genuine respect for the institution.

On the other hand, her family had been a cage. Sakura was always struggling to find her footing, always making sure that she is not stepping on too many toes. Always wanting to both fight with her mother and make her feel proud, too. Trying to figure out how to do the latter.

Until Itachi came and obliterated the whole plan.

After they come to a tentative decision, Naruto invites Sakura to the pub where he has planned to meet with Kiba and his friend.

"Are you still trying to set me up?" Sakura laughs as they reach her parked car on the roadside.

Naruto beams, shrugs casually. "Maybe. Maybe not."

"Naruto!"

He laughs, rubbing the back of his neck. "Okay honest to god, this is a friendly invitation. With no ulterior motive. And it'll be super fun!"

Sakura relents, mostly because she wants to witness Naruto with his latest date. She's never seen him romantically interacting with another man before.


The pub is crowded early in the evening itself.

"Kiba did say that it's a popular place," Naruto shouts in her ear as they meander through the swarm of bodies in search of aforementioned person. "Or maybe we've become too old for this shit."

Sakura laughs. "We're not that old!"

"Speak for yourself," Naruto grumbles. "I feel like my back is in constant need of a massage. I can't even go full nights drinking anymore!"

They manage to find the table eventually, and Sakura watches with amusement as Naruto greets Kiba with a loud kiss right on the lips. She quickly averts her eyes to Kiba's friend, and finds herself facing Uchiha Sasuke instead.

"What the–?" They both say at the same time.

And then Sakura smacks Sasuke in the head.

"Hey, Haruno!" Sasuke glares at her, and hits her in the arm as she takes a place beside him. "What the fuck are you doing here? And what's wrong with your hair?"

Sakura rolls her eyes, still processing that Kiba's friend – the bisexual that Naruto wanted to hook her up with – is none other than Uchiha Itachi's younger brother.

Sasuke looks old. Not old old. But old. A grown man. It's such a strange feeling that she pinches him on the cheek for good measure, just to make sure that no one had drugged her lunch and that she's hallucinating this whole event.

Sasuke once again hits her in the arm, glaring. "Can you stop that for fuck's sake? And seriously, what is up with your hair!"

"Nothing is up with my hair, you moron!" Sakura says, gingerly touching her head nevertheless.

During school, Sakura had preferred to keep her hair at mid-length. Not too long, not too short. Now, though, she's finally grown them out, and skipped the bangs on the front so it looks more mature and adult and schoolteacher–like.

"It looks terrible," Sasuke tells her sincerely. "As though all life has been sucked out of you."

"Look who's talking," Sakura snaps, feeling the tell-tale annoyance at this human being.

"My hair is perfectly fine!"

"Your hair looks like a duck's ass!"

"Hey!" Sasuke almost yells back, his hand immediately going to the back of his head. "I'm just having a bad hair day, Ms. I'm-Better-Than-You! Aniki switched my shampoo with conditioner. Again!"

Sakura openly laughs at him, her shoulders shaking with mirth.

"Do you guys know each other?" Naruto finally gets done making out with Kiba and is staring at them both with wide blue eyes.

"Yes," Sasuke says.

"Sort of," Sakura adds.

"She had a thing for my brother," Sasuke declares casually.

Sakura smacks him again. "His brother and I have history."

"Oh so you dated Itachi?" Kiba asks curiously.

"She wishes," Sasuke snorts, taking a languid sip of his beer.

"Shut it," Sakura hisses at him. "It wasn't like that. His brother used to be my best friend."

"And more."

"Sasuke, you little shit," Sakura snatches his beer bottle instead and holds it away from him. "Can you stop being a complete dickhead for one second?"

Sasuke makes a grab for it and fails. "No. Give my bottle back."

"No. Apologize."

And then Sasuke smirks, as though he's found a juicy fish in a desert. "Did I hurt your feelings, Cherry? Maybe I should call Aniki and he can kiss it away for you." And then he pauses dramatically, eyes big with fake concern. "Oh, wait. You guys never even kissed!"

Sakura's jaw clenches. She was an utter fool to have ever believed that she missed this little piece of shit after her fall-out with Itachi.

And we did kiss, she wants to shout at him.

"Okay, time-out!" Naruto interjects forcefully. "This is not the place for old … fights. Or whatever. Sakura, meet my date. Kiba, meet my colleague and friend."

Sakura smiles at him sheepishly, finally giving Sasuke his precious beer back.

Kiba turns out to be a handyman, and Sakura doesn't want to, but she honestly believes that he seems like a stereotype that she's seen in movies. He is clearly hard-working, sincere, very honest with his thoughts, and an overall laidback individual who admires Naruto's academic inclination.

When Sakura asks Sasuke how he managed to make such a wonderful person to be his friend, he throws a french-fry in her face. And then tells her that Kiba had accidentally come across Sasuke messing with the water tap of the men's washroom during a routine check at his office.

"Shouldn't you be reporting him?" Sakura suggests innocently. "Oh wait, he is the HR Head! What a commendable job you've been doing, Sasuke."

Kiba chuckles, amused. "He was not really harming anyone. It was honestly a stupid, childish thing to do."

"I think it was super cool," Naruto adds, and Sasuke gives him a high-five in delight.

Kiba throws his arm around Naruto's shoulder and tackles him playfully. "Oh, yeah? Do you like stupid, childish pranks, Professor?"

"Teacher!" Naruto corrects him, trying to swat him away gleefully.

"So," Sasuke purposefully turns to her. "Aniki did mention that you're both on talking terms again."

Sakura carefully morphs her face into a casual one. "Yes."

"That's good," Sasuke says sincerely. "I wish you both hadn't been so fucking stupid."

Sakura swallows more beer to give herself time to think of an appropriate response. And fails. So she merely shrugs, trying not to think about the last time she had met Sasuke. When she had driven down to Itachi's dorm room in the heavy rains, crying and heartbroken, and found Sasuke instead.


When Sakura returns home at the end of the day, she is too tired for life. She kicks off her shoes, and drops face-down on the bed in the darkness without bothering to freshen up or change her clothes.

It was a good evening, she supposes. Meeting Sasuke had truly been the highlight. She had missed that little shit more than she wanted to admit.

She thinks she's happy for Naruto, too. He seems to be in acceptance of his modified sexual orientation, and there were times when it felt that he was close to freaking out, but Sasuke would redirect the whole table to some or the other mundane detail about the pub. By the time they left the pub, Naruto looked happy and satisfied and even pulled Sasuke in a hug, whispering something in his ear.

Sakura isn't entirely sure how long she stays in the same position, but after what feels like two hours, her phone beeps, brightening up beside her head.

What a small world.

Sakura snorts humourlessly and types back.

Tell me about it.


Summer of 2012

Aunt Guren and Uncle Yukimaru have come over with good news.

"We don't want to know the sex," Uncle Yukimaru beams proudly. "Guren says it'll be a girl, though. Mother's instincts. Can't argue with that."

Kizashi belly laughs and Mebuki starts gushing over how cute the baby is going to be. Sakura, on the other hand, is slightly freaked out.

Aunt Guren as a mother? That's something she really can't wrap her head around. And it feels even stranger when Sakura is in the kitchen, scooping out strawberry ice cream as dessert for everyone, when she feels someone watching her. She frowns, slowly turning on the spot, and there's Aunt Guren, standing stock-still with hardened, determined eyes.

"Aunt Guren?"

Aunt Guren purses her lips. "You're going to throw away your future, Sakura. I can't stand by and watch it happen."

Sakura feels a chill crawling up her spine. "Excuse me?"

"That boy you keep talking to. He's no good at all. He doesn't have any direction in life, and you have such potential. Why would you throw that away for him?"

Sakura breathes in deeply, her fingers clenching around the large spoon. She can hear faint laughter coming from the living room.

"I'm not throwing anything away for anyone, Aunt Guren."

Her aunt takes a step forward. "What is he going to do?"

"None of your business."

"I saw your phone. I saw your texts. I saw how you discussed your virginity with him. How he promised he'll take it if you don't find anyone in college to do it for you."

Sakura sees red. "You-! How dare-!"

But Aunt Guren isn't done. She continues with more determination. "I know boys like him, Sakura. All they want is some nice little girl to love them so that they can justify their actions. So that at the end of the day they can stare in the mirror and be glad that a nice girl likes them. You're that girl. You'll always be that girl. You applied to colleges that are closer to his while he hasn't given a single thought about what he wants in life."

"Yes, he does!" Sakura interjects forcefully. "He's getting into design. And he's very good at it."

"Have you seen any of his work?" Aunt Guren questions icily.

Sakura wants to say yes so badly, it feels like her throat will explode. But she hasn't. Itachi has never shown her anything. He had never even expressed his desire to get into design. He'd said he isn't sure what he wants, so he might as well experiment a little.

Which is fine. Not everyone knows what they want in life at all times.

Just like Sakura isn't entirely sure about an English degree. All she knows is that it sounds interesting and she has nothing else that she is certain about, anyway. So it's fine.

Except that it isn't.

That is just what she had said to Itachi because she didn't want him to feel bad about his choices. Sakura might not know what she will end up doing eventually, but she knows her major. And yes, she does prefer colleges that will be closer to Itachi's because they have two weeks left until their final exams begin, and she just can't imagine not being friends with him –

Except that she's sick of being friends with him.

Sakura wants more. She's always wanted more. And at first she thought he did, too. When he would find reasons to talk to her, or to sit with her, or even joke with her. That he might be feeling it, too. And Sakura wants to scream at him because this is the time-!

This is the time to do something about it. To tell her what he wants. To show her what he's interested in.

But Aunt Guren is staring back, knowing that she's won.

Sakura tries one last ditch effort. "He's going to be very good at it. And you have no right to snoop around in my phone, Aunt Guren. It's called bad manners."

Her aunt glares. "I'm warning you, Sakura. That boy is bad news. If you have any sense left inside you, then you'll know this is the time to take a step back from him. To have some space to think about what you want in life! And not what he wants."

"I'm not doing what he wants! And what's so bad about it, anyway? He's my best friend. I'll do whatever he wants if it makes him happy."

"Best friend? Is this what best friends talk about? Having sex with each other if no one else is willing? I thought you were smarter than that."

Sakura doesn't want to, really she doesn't, but the memory of that conversation happening one late night warms her very nerves. She doesn't remember how exactly, but there came a time when Sakura found herself typing a text where she said how she's heard rumours that if you're still a virgin when you get into college, then you're considered a prude.

Itachi had typed back:

That's just in movies, Cherry. Relax. Besides, I'm a virgin too! XD

You are? I thought you might have found someone by now.

Hahaha! Why would I? I don't want a random girl to do it with.

LOL. Same.

Tell you what. Let's just take each other's virginity if we don't find anyone, yeah? Then no one will call us prude. ;-)

Hahaha are you sure that's what you want Giraffe? I don't know. You might be horrible at it.

As if! Allow me to tell you that I have seen a lot of porn and been in a LOT of discussions. I know what I'll be doing. I can't say the same about you.

Please! I know everything, okay? I know how to make someone feel good.

Really? I'd like a trailer, please. Otherwise, I won't be interested in the movie.

What? How will I give a trailer for this? O.o

Get creative.

Fine.

And then Sakura had proceeded to explain this one trick she'd heard from Ino about blowjobs in absolute detail, before she said she'd like a trailer, too.

And Itachi had explained in greater detail what he'd like to do with her, where, and how many times.

The conversation had ended with Sakura a panting mess, a vivid mental picture, and the next day, Itachi had winked at her from across the table, but never touched her.

Which had been kind of weird. But Sakura had let it go because she didn't know how to behave, either.

"You're running behind something that doesn't exist, Sakura," Aunt Guren tells her when Sakura hasn't said anything at all for a good full minute.

Sakura wants to say that it does exist, but for some reason, her throat closes up and her eyes start to prickle.

Itachi's voice rings in her head. You can get scared of things that are not real. Things that don't exist.

And she sees it now, more clearly than ever, how downright terrifying it is to know that something you've always cherished, has never existed in the first place.


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