After I helped Alex decorate his bedroom we walked back into the lounge room, Alex following me with a slight smile on his lips. Reaching the small table that the television rested on I knelt while Alex remained standing his eyes sweeping over me while I opened the small cupboard built into the table.
Kiara is something I have never seen in a human since I was created. She is kind, humorous and even gave me a room for myself. Even if I don't really sleep it was a nice gesture and I am supposed to be the one helping her. Does she care for me because I look human or is it something else that makes her care?
"Alex, I have a bunch of movies so which one would you like to watch?" I asked him and he blinked his LED flashing yellow before he knelt beside me. Handing him some of my dvds I waited as he flicked through them before he smiled and I grinned back once he selected one, standing. Waiting patiently, Alex observed how carefully I set the dvds back into the cupboard before I shut the doors his eyes moving across my body before it could stop himself. When I climbed to my feet I noticed that the LED glowing yellow and for a moment or two red, a slight frown on his face. "Alex, you look like something's wrong. Care to tell me what's bothering you?"
"Nothing's the matter, Kiara." Alex told me and I snorted arms crossed against my chest as I waited for him to admit what was bothering him. Seeing the way my eyes stared into his unblinking he finally sighed, fiddling with the dvd case clutched in his hands. "Do you think I could be...deviant?" He asked and I blinked at him not expecting that kind of question.
"Deviant? I really don't know, Alex. Would that be so bad?" I finally answered and both his eyebrows shot up in shock. "Don't get your circuits into a twist, Alex. Frankly I like you no matter what so does it matter?"
"I guess not. But I keep having thoughts and even...feelings sometimes. To tell you the truth I am afraid." Alex replied as he wandered back to the couch, his fingers fiddling with the case again as his LED flashed yellow. "I did run a diagnostic on myself but nothing seems damaged or working incorrectly." He added and I gave him a tiny smile, placing a hand on his shoulder giving it a gentle squeeze.
"Here, I'll put that movie on then we can watch it together." I replied and he handed the case to me his eyes on me as I etracted the dvd from it. I walked back to the television my fingers lightly brushing the button that caused the dvd drive to slide out and as I slid the dvd in I felt like Alex's eyes were on me the entire time.
For some reason it sent a tingle down my spine though it wasn't an unpleasant one and I turned around with a faint smile on my face to find Alex already sitting, patting the couch like he'd seen me do and I walked over to join him.
Once I sat he moved close so we were inches apart and for the first time I bridged the gap making his eyes blink when I leant my head on his shoulder, my gaze on the television as the movie started to load.
We sat in silence for the entire movie, one I had watched several times on my own since I had broken up with my current boyfriend. A romantic movie wasn't the best thing to watch after a messy breakup but at the time I needed a good. I had barely gotten through the first twenty minutes before I was crying into a box of tissues. Though after another viewing I realized that not for the first time I was glad I was on my own again and I actually smiled, my head still resting on Alex's shoulder.
Since we had sat on the couch together Alex had barely moved his focus mostly on the movie though I did feel him shift once or twice his eyes observing me when he thought I wasn't looking. But I knew what he was doing and I didn't stop him, enjoying the attention a little after being alone since the accident.
The movie credits flashed onto the screen and Alex let out a breath my head lifting from his shoulder as I turned my head to see him frowning, chewing his lower lip.
"Did you like the movie?" I asked him and he nodded immediately though once I noticed his eyes weren't on me I sighed. "Alex, just tell me what's wrong."
"Nothing is..." Alex trailed off when I narrowed my eyes at him not blinking until he did. "I don't understand why humans pretend they don't care about one another."
"We're just weird like that. I know it makes sense to you but sometimes it's not easy to tell someone that you care about them." I explained and he chewed his lip again, clearly not convinced.
"I care about you and I don't need to pretend. You care about me don't you?" Alex asked, his hand moving to mine and I let out a breath finding myself speechless. Seeing me struggling to respond to his question I saw the LED on his temple flashing red and that brought a frown to my face his hand moving from mine before he rested it in his lap. "I shouldn't have grown attached to you. I am meant to serve you and not get attached."
"Alex, you just caught me off guard and...where are you going?" I asked as he rose from the couch his eyes moving to the front door. "Hey, Alex!" I called out when he started to head towards the front door. I stepped forward and when he felt a tug Alex turned his head slightly to see me staring at him my eyes looking directly into his eyes.
"I need to think. I will be back shortly." Alex assured me and I shook my head gripping his arm tighter until he frowned at me. "Kiara, I promise to come back. I cannot deviate from my programming so...Kiara?" He whispered, shocked as he saw the faint stirrings of tears in my eyes before I released my grip.
"You're just like all of my so-called friends and boyfriends. They abandoned me a long time before I found myself trapped in my own house. They always said that they would come back but they didn't." I whispered, unable to stop a sniffle before my eyes narrowed at the android. Instead of anger at my outburst he fiddled with his shirt cuffs his eyes downcast with an almost hurt expression on his face.
Right then seeing the hurt in his eyes I wanted to apologize, to take back all of the angry words I had said. Before I could open my mouth Alex walked out on me and I actually flinched as the door clicked shut behind me.
Stumbling over to the door I tried to follow him though as soon as I started to step through the doorway the shakes began and I hurried back, nearly stumbling over the doorway. Slamming the door behind me I fell to my knees tears slipping down my cheeks as I wrapped my arms around my body, sniffling at the sudden departure of my friend.
As I struggled to make sense of why he had left, Alex found himself wandering the streets a few blocks from my house. Despite the snow falling on his shoulders he didn't even notice how cold it was, a thin smile on his face at the thought of having to deal with being cold.
CyberLife might not have given me the ability to feel the cold but they apparently thought giving me emotions was a good idea.
With nowhere else to go Alex decided to walk a few blocks hoping the walk would help him figure out why Kiara had snapped at him. Several blocks later he found himself somewhere unfamiliar which wasn't a stretch once he remembered that he'd only travelled from CyberLife to Kiara's house since he had been activated.
Just thinking about her sent a pang of pain through his body and Alex sighed to himself as he stopped, barely even aware he'd paused in the middle of the street until a driver beeped their horn very loudly at him.
Moving to the sidewalk to allow the car past Alex stood silently watching the traffic go by until he felt a light tap on his shoulder and he turned to find a man standing in front of him. He looked in his mid thirties with short blond hair and brown eyes that reminded Alex of Kiara's eyes. It wasn't until he saw the LED on his temple that he blinked and the android smiled.
"Are you lost? It happens to us when we become self-aware." The android explained as he guided Alex towards a group of androids who looked up when they walked over. Standing near them Alex observed that they were dressed in various outfits the only visible sign they were not human the LEDS. "What caused you to flee your owner? I am Greg." He added and Alex shook his head.
"I didn't flee I just had an argument with Kiara." Alex explained and Greg raised an eyebrow at him. "She isn't my owner she is my friend and...I think I've fallen in love with her."
"But that's not allowed. Humans and androids can never be together. You are just confused." Another android pointed out, a woman this time with white hair tied back and green eyes.
"I know I care for Kiara and she cares for me. She showed me movies, games and even gave me my own room." Alex protested and everyone stared at him, their eyes watching as he ran a hand through his hair as his LED flashed red. "I didn't mean to run away I was confused about my emotions."
"She spends time with you because she wants to control you." The female android told him and he shook his head, edging away when she tried to touch his hand. "I just want to see what you do in her." She whispered and after a pause Alex nodded, placing his hand on hers.
In a flash of memories the android saw everything Alex had experienced; from his creation to meeting Kiara and learning about her. Eventually the android removed her hand having seen the moment Alex had began to fear his own deviancy.
"You do love her. I always thought that was impossible between our kind and humans but...maybe I was wrong." She admitted and Alex briefly nodded, too caught up in all the memories of Kiara flashing through his mind. "I am Lisa and I believe you should return to her."
"Lisa is right. She might have been your owner once but...she needs you now. Maybe we were wrong and some humans are kind." Greg answered and Alex gave him a brief smile before he started to head back to Kiara's house.
He had just stepped back onto the sidewalk when he saw someone searching the area and after he blinked he found himself looking at Kiara, who hadn't even noticed him yet. Clad in a pair of jeans, a thin white shirt and sneakers he saw Kiara pull a small jacket that barely covered her waist tighter around her.
"Kiara, over here!" He called, a smile on his face that she had come looking for him tempered by the fact she wasn't dressed appropriately for the snow. Finally spotting him I raced over being careful not to get run over by the traffic before I raced to join him on the opposite sidewalk.
"What are you doing here? You left your house?" Alex asked and I nearly raised my hand there and then, the urge to smack him across his face almost too much to bear.
"You idiot! I wandered in the snow for hours looking for you and that's all you can say? I'm freezing my ass off and this is thanks I get?!" I snapped my usual calm and sweet nature drowned out by the frustration and a little fear I felt as I glared at him.
Seeing the anger in my features he kept his mouth shut only blinking at me when he finally noticed that both of my shoulders were quivering. "Stupid, moronic..." I trailed off with a light sniff my eyes already welling.
"You're shivering." He pointed out and I snorted at him, wrapping my arms around myself as it slowly dawned on me that just a pair of sneakers, jeans and a thin jacket were not appropriate winter clothing. "Hang on you've been walking around in the snow dressed like that for hours? Come on I'm walking you home." He answered trying to take my hand before I shook him off and he stared as I narrowed my eyes.
"Not before I give you a piece of my mind. After you walked out on me I thought that I'd give you an hour or two to cool off." I replied, a thin smile on my face when I noticed how that sounded. "But you were gone for hours and stupid me decided that maybe something bad had happened. So I rushed out without even dressing for the weather and..." I coughed then, wiping my nose before I opened my mouth to finish venting my anger until I sneezed so loudly that I stumbled.
Alex stepped close and despite my protests he gently pressed an open palm against my forehead, his LED glowing before he blinked back at me. "You're burning up." He said and I rolled my eyes at him, turning on my heel before he say anything else. I barely even registered that I was falling before strong arms caught me and I let out a sigh my visions blurring to nothing.
The next thing I knew I was lying on something warm and soft, my head a fog as I tried and failed to understand where exactly I had woken up. It took me only a few moments to realize two things; that the lights are too bright for my headache to stand and that maybe I shouldn't be awake right now.
Curling into a blanket I barely noticed someone had wrapped around me I let myself pass out not seeing a pair of pale blue eyes moving towards me, a quiet sigh the last thing I'm aware of before I'm out.
The next time I weakly open my eyes I can see a familiar face staring at me those same eyes watching though as my vision clears I notice that he's not looking directly at me but the wall behind my bed. I tried to raise my head the room tilting at a sudden and dangerous angle to my already aching head that I lay back, a weak groan escaping that made Alex finally look towards me.
"You're awake?" He asked, his voice so quiet I barely registed it. Climbing to his feet he hurried over to me and I groaned again, his hand gently stroking my cheek. "Kiara, I'm so sorry." He whispered and for a moment I heard him swallow, a reflex I thought at that moment but as I watched on, vision slipping in and out of focus I saw his shoulders quiverng.
When he knelt in front of me, his hand gentle on my burning skin I saw his eyes were wet and as I watched on I saw him slowly close his eyes, a single tear slipping down his pale cheek. "You collapsed on me and after I brought you back home you were so still I thought..." He told me and I gave him a weak grin, pulling my aching body close enough so I could rest my head on his lap.
"I...promise not...to wander off. Just stop being so weepy." I scolded though the hint of a smile on my face made him realize I was just kidding. Silently he lifted me onto his lap and I closed my eyes as he slowly stroked my forehead, the LED on his temple blinking red for a moment before it settled back to blue. "Silly...android."
"I know, I know. I really am deviant." Alex whispered to me and I snorted at him the fever making me nauseous. Giving up on staying awake I fell asleep to Alex's humming a tiny smile on his face as he stroked my hair.