"Y'know the last time I saw you was right after Liz gave birth? You were gonna go out and buy some diapers and meet us back at the apartment. You remember that?"

"Yes."

"You went out, but you never came back."

Season 3.20- Say Goodnight, Gracie

1984

She met him at a festival. Luke had hated him from the moment he set eyes on him. He hated the way his name felt in his mouth. Jimmy. It made him feel sick. He was worse than the others, as far as Luke was concerned. But there was no telling Liz anything. She was obsessed, and now she was pregnant.

William made her finish high school, but beyond that, she didn't have to listen to him anymore. And she didn't. She was preparing to move into some crappy apartment in New York with Jimmy and spent all her time floating around the house, on the phone discussing baby names.

"Charlotte for a girl." Luke heard her say as he walked in the front door. She was pressed against the wall with a cigarette dangling out of her mouth. "Charlotte. I like that name Jimmy, it was my mom's name." she paused. "Well, what girl's names are there that aren't one of your exes' names? I'm not being passive-aggressive I'm genuinely asking."

Luke grabbed the phone off her and hung up. He snatched the cigarette out of her mouth.

"You can't smoke when you're pregnant," he growled.

Liz snatched it back. "It's my life, big brother."

"Not just yours." Luke hissed, pointing to her stomach. He grabbed the cigarette again and threw it to the floor, stamping it out. Liz rolled her eyes.

"So," she asked. "Where have you been?"

"None of your business."

"On a date?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Liz!" Luke whined, exasperated, and aware that he sounded like a kid.

"Guys, leave each other alone!" William called from the next room. He was reading a book on newborns. It had been a while since they'd had one around, and he would bet anything that Liz would have no idea what to do. He wanted to be able to help her out if she needed him. "A baby, huh Lottie?" he murmured to himself. "Strange, strange times. What would you say about all this? I bet I can guess."

"Uh, Dad?" Luke interrupted cautiously. William jumped, having not seen him walk in. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, Luke, I'm fine. What do you want?"

"Nothing. Just didn't want to stay in there and watch Liz throw her life away anymore."

"Hey, don't talk about your sister like that," William said, half-heartedly. "She could be a good mom."

Luke shot him a look and William broke eye contact and returned to his reading. "Did you know newborn skulls aren't fully formed? They're in these like, pieces, that fuse together during the first few years. So you've gotta be real careful with a baby's head."

"I think I'd be careful with a baby's head anyway, Dad."

"Yeah, well, now you know why."

"Hey, Dad?"

"Yeah."

"You think Jimmy's gonna stick around?"

"He better."

The day Liz went into labor, Luke wasn't home. He was out at some stupid town thing, 'representing the Danes family' because William was working and Liz was too pregnant. She was still living in Stars Hollow, agreeing with Jimmy that they should move into the apartment as soon as the baby was born. Luke was stood there in the town square, hating his life as he watched children dressed as bulbs dance around him and wishing for any excuse to leave. He got one, of course, through Babette.

"Luke!" she screeched. "Luukkkee!"

"What?" Luke asked.

"She's..." Babette paused, panting. "That guy, the one none of us like, with the John Stamos hair? He's a piece of work, that kid. He's from out of town, that's how you know!"

Luke was getting impatient. "What about him, Babette?"

"He was by your house picking up Liz. Eastside Tilly heard them. Liz was all crying out and swearing and that kid," she spat on the ground, "was talking 'bout the hospital and putting her in his car. I think she's having the baby, Luke!"

"Ah Jeez!" Luke didn't even stop to thank Babette, he just bolted to the store and flung the door open. "It's happening Dad!" he yelled. "C'mon, let's go! You're having a grandkid!"

By the time they got there, Liz was already in the birthing room.

"Well how do I get in there, I wanna see her!" Luke was arguing with the nurse.

"Sir, she only wants the father in with her for the actual birth. Don't worry she's doing just fine."

"Is the father here?"

"Yes, he's in there with her now." the nurse gave him a strange look as if to say 'Why wouldn't the father be there?', but Luke knew with Jimmy it was never a given.

William sat slouched in a horribly uncomfortable waiting room chair, reading his book. Luke had gone in search of food and William had moved himself into a more general waiting room. There were more people in here, and he liked that.

When he and Lottie were dating, he used to take her to coffee shops or town squares and they'd play a game called Let's Judge People. All it entailed was looking at someone and trying to figure out what sort of job or life they might have. William glanced around the waiting room. There were some pretty standard lawyers, bus drivers, and cashiers, he reckoned. There was a guy who looked like he had some sort of pain in his leg so William guessed he worked as a photographer, always having to crouch down to get that perfect shot. Good guess he could almost hear Lottie say. He could feel her here. After all, it was the hospital she died in.

He shook that thought out of his head and continued with his game. Across from him was a girl in a deep red jumper. He watched her for a moment trying to figure her out as she listened to her walkman. This was a tricky one. He watched her for a few more moments before deciding that it was, in fact, a trick question. She was too young to work. She couldn't be more than sixteen or seventeen.

'Williiaamm' he heard Lottie sing-song 'remember your heart! She's only sixteen and she's here on her own. Why?' William looked at her again. She was pregnant. Obviously. How had he missed that the first time? He was terrible at Let's Judge People. She did look completely alone and absolutely terrified. He was about to go speak to her when a nurse came over and started asking her questions. William remembered himself. "None of our business, Lots," he murmured. Lottie didn't respond.

Jess Mariano's birth was complicated. The labor was long and tricky and Liz was tired and dehydrated for most of it. Luke just got more and more stressed as the hours dragged by and nobody came to fill him in on what was going on. It was the middle of the night before an exhausted Jimmy emerged.

"It's over. You can go in and see them now," he said.

"Finally!" Luke replied.

"I'm just gonna go grab some essentials. I'll meet you back at the apartment." Jimmy said.

"Yeah ok, whatever." Luke didn't like that Liz was moving to that place but there was nothing he could do about it. He looked over to his father, who was firmly asleep, head dropped off to the side. Luke considered waking him, but it was late at night and he knew William would insist on opening the store up at the crack of dawn tomorrow. So he let his father sleep, and ventured in alone.

Liz was sat up in bed with the baby in her arms. She didn't take her eyes off his face but acknowledged Luke's entry with her classic "Hey big brother."

"Hi," Luke said, lost for words.

"It's a boy," Liz whispered. "Isn't he cute?"

"Very," Luke replied. Hospitals freaked him out, and he wasn't good with babies. He didn't know why he'd been so desperate to get in here. "So, uh, how'd it go?"

Liz waved her hand dismissively. "Could've gone better, could've gone worse," she said. "But t's over now. You gotta live in the moment, Luke. Forget the past, look at the future. This," she tapped the baby's nose. "is the future. This is my future. This is my guy."

Luke watched her, trying to decode what she'd just said. "Liz?" he asked, tentatively.

"Yeah?"

"Jimmy's not coming back, is he?"

Liz didn't look up at him, and she didn't reply for a while. She just made faces at the baby and blew him kisses. Luke waited patiently.

"We're on our own," she whispered, eventually.

Thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed this little chapter, with our special guest star: the girl in the red jumper ;) Leave a review and let me know what you thought! x