Two weeks later

Harm and Mac's apartment

Mac smiled as Mattie walked into the kitchen. It had been a trying couple of weeks for both of them and poor Harm had been stuck in the middle dealing with Mattie's anger at her father and Mac's PTSD after killing Sadiq Fahd. Things were calming down for them. Mac had seen a therapist and was going to continue in a therapy group for women. Mattie had her first meeting with Alateen the previous night and had agreed to attend regularly. Harm was back to his old self again after the car battery exploded and temporarily hurt his hearing.

"Good morning, Mattie."

"Good morning," Mattie said as she sat down. "Where's Harm?"

"He went for a run," Mac said and put a batch of pancakes on the table. "I figure we could be a little unhealthy. We deserve it."

Mattie smiled. "I love the way you think."

Mac chuckled. She sat down and sipped her coffee. "Listen, Mattie, I wanted to apologize to you for the last two weeks. There's a lot I can't tell you because it's classified but know that I'm getting help and I'm feeling better."

Mattie nodded. "I'm sure that guy you yelled at for approaching me won't approach strangers again ever."

Mac offered an apologetic smile. "I'll blame that on my PTSD."

"Isn't PTSD what soldiers get in battle?" Mattie wondered.

"Not just soldiers," Mac explained. "Anyone who's been through a traumatic event can get PTSD. In my case, I was so prepared to fight my hostage-taker that I couldn't let it go. I went back to thinking that I was the only person who could look after me and the people around me that every encounter became a chance to attack."

"When that man approached me you felt that he was a threat?" Mattie assumed. "I went crazy at Harm because I was angry at my father."

"We're not that different you and me, Mattie. I grew up in an unpredictable household. I was always afraid my father would mistake me for my mother and put his fist through my face. You lost your mom too. You're angry at your father. I know he didn't beat your mom or you, but his alcoholism made you feel unsafe." Mac leaned back on her chair and searched Mattie's face. "Harm just wants you to get closure. He knows how important that is. He was the one who encouraged me to get closure with my father."

"Did you?" Mattie wondered.

Mac shook her head. "He was in a coma by the time I came there. I never got to talk to him. I learned from a priest that my father was sorry and that he was proud of my accomplishments. I never got to tell him how much he hurt me."

"I'm sorry, Mac," Mattie said sincerely.

"Yeah, me too." Mac hesitated. "I know you're not ready to forgive your father, but keep an open mind, okay? Sometimes we need to forgive to be able to move on. To let go of the anger."

"Are you still angry at your father?" Mattie wondered.

"I've come to realize that he was a damaged man. He probably had some sort of war trauma and the alcohol became his escape. He was in Vietnam. I can understand it but it doesn't make it any easier for me. I'm still that little girl who's scared and alone and feeling like she is the only one looking out for her. I think I'll always have that little girl with me," Mac admitted.

Mattie nodded. "Thank you for telling me this, Mac."

Mac smiled. "Any time you need to talk, I'm here. Harm too. He's amazing. We're lucky to have him."

"We are," Mattie agreed. "And I'm happy that you guys are together. You both deserve happiness."

"Thank you, Mattie," Mac said sincerely. Even with everything that had transpired the last few weeks she had never been happier.

The next day

Harm knocked on Mattie's door and waited for her reply before opening it. The teenager was on the bed reading a book.

"I just wanted to see if you were ready to go?" he said as he stepped inside.

"I am," Mattie confirmed and put the bookmark into place before closing the book.

Harm sat down on a chair. "Listen, before you go I wanted to talk to you about everything that has been going on around here."

"It's okay, Harm. I know there are things you and Mac can't talk to me about. Mac told me as much as she could and I understand why things have been difficult for her," Mattie said and got off the bed. "About my father, Harm. I'm sorry that I told you that I sometimes think that I'd be better off not knowing you. I didn't mean that."

Harm nodded. "I understand how difficult all this is, Mattie. But know that Mac and I are here for you. We want you to be happy."

"I know that. Can we change the subject? I just want to enjoy the movie night with Jenn tonight," Mattie said and grabbed her bag.

"Sure," Harm said and stood.

"What are you and Mac going to do tonight?" Mattie wondered.

Harm shrugged. "Probably just stay home and relax. A quiet night."

Mattie smiled. "You take good care of her. Both of us."

Harm smiled sheepishly. "I don't know. Sometimes it feels like all I do is make you both frustrated with me."

"You're probably just standing in the line of fire," Mattie teased.

"Yeah, that's probably it," Harm said with laughter.

Later

Harm closed the dishwasher and turned it on. Mac had made him a three-course dinner. They'd had a nice time together after two weeks of ups and downs.

"So what did I do to deserve this?" he wondered.

Mac smiled and finished drying a casserole. "For keeping up with me lately." She put the casserole away and turned to him. "I'm sorry for all the things I said. I was lashing out and you didn't deserve any of it."

"I was in the line of fire," he reasoned remembering Mattie's words earlier. "And isn't that what a relationship is all about? Being there even when things get rough."

"Yeah, I guess," she said as she leaned on the counter. She looked thoughtful. "But I was way out of line."

"You were running on adrenaline, Mac. The rest of the world wasn't going fast enough for you. I could have been more understanding," he admitted.

"No, you were great. And you were right to tell me no when I came on to you the way I did. That would have been a mistake," she said, offering a sweet smile. "I wasn't in the right state of mind to move our relationship to the next level."

"It wasn't easy," he admitted with a sheepish smile. "But it would have been wrong."

She nodded.

"Are you okay to go back to work on Monday?" he wondered.

"Yeah, I'm good. I apologized for my behavior in the courtroom. The Admiral was not pleased with me after I threw the Meredith thing in his face. What was I thinking?" she said with a sigh.

"You weren't thinking, you were reacting," Harm reminded her.

"I'm lucky he didn't reprimand me for my behavior," she pointed out.

"The Admiral knows that you weren't yourself. He cares about you, Mac," Harm reassured and reached out taking her hand. "It'll be okay."

"I've done so much apologizing this week, but apologizing to you is most important. I don't know what I'd do without you," she admitted.

He smiled and pulled her closer. "You'll never find out," he promised.

She smiled. "I really hope not." She leaned in and kissed him. "I love you, Harm."

"I love you too, Sarah," he said before kissing her again.

They were both breathless by the time the kiss ended. Mac took Harm's hand and led him out of the kitchen, across the living room, and for her bedroom.

The next morning

Mac stretched lazily and noticed that the warm body that had been next to her all night was gone. She rubbed her eyes and sat up just as the bedroom door opened.

"Good morning," Harm said smilingly. He walked in with a tray.

Mac smiled. "Good morning. What is this?"

"Well, I remember a comment you made out in the woods after being shot by poachers. About guys making you breakfast after you've spent the night." He put the tray down in front of her and leaned in and kissed her softly.

"Technically you spent the night with me," she pointed out.

"Lawyers," he said with a slight eye roll as he slipped into bed next to her. "Always bringing up technicalities."

"Sorry," she said and smiled sweetly. "This is really nice of you, Harm." She reached for the robe by her side and got out of bed slipping it on. "I'll be right back."

Harm reached for a strawberry and took a bite. Last night and early this morning had been perfect. Taking this next step made it more official that it would be the two of them.

"This is perfect," Mac said as she got back into bed.

Harm reached for the newspaper. "It is," he agreed. "There's coffee, and eggs and strawberries."

"A girl could get used to this," she said and sipped her coffee.

Harm smiled and reached out and touched her arm softly. "Me too."

"How will this work exactly?" she questioned. "We're dating but we live together. It's confusing."

He chuckled. "Yeah," he agreed.

"So?" she questioned.

"Well, I'm all in, Mac," he said firmly. "We already live together so I guess the next step is for you to move into my bedroom."

"Why your bedroom?" she questioned.

"Because it's bigger and further away from Mattie's room," he said and leaned in and kissed her. "More privacy."

"Yeah, that's a good point," she agreed as she bit his lip teasingly.

"Shouldn't we have breakfast before it gets cold?" he wondered between kisses.

She broke away from him. "You started this."

"Me?" he said innocently.

"Yes, you," she said with laughter. "Not that I mind."

"Good," he said and smiled cleverly.