I am SO sorry that it took me a full 2 weeks to update this story, I was moving back home from university and it was quite an adjustment. Hopefully the action in this chapter will make up for the lateness though :)
Chapter 7
After removing the sand from two Aperture Science weighted cubes, GLaDOS shot a laser out of her finger - much to Chell's surprise - and easily sliced off the bottom sides of them, and cut out round holes in the side for seeing.
"Wow, are you just a very high tech swiss army knife?" Chell asked fascinated, "why didn't you use that laser finger against the mantis?"
"I am not, in fact, a 'swiss army knife," GLaDOS retorted. "I am the greatest collection of wisdom ever created. Last time I checked, tools cannot speak. And as for the miniature thermal discouragement beam, it requires a lot of energy which I run out of if I am not plugged into the mainframe every now and then. Now, try to get into the cube, I need to figure out if your… generous...ness… will fit."
Chell rolled her eyes at the comment, but did as she was told so as not to start any more unnecessary arguments with the supercomputer. She did indeed fit inside the cube and could see GLaDOS' knees while crouching down and looking out the eye holes. "I fit and I can see."
"Try moving around." Chell was glad that all of the testing she had been forced to do at Aperture as well as the long fall boots made her legs very strong because continuing to crouch down and move around inside of the cube wouldn't have been easy otherwise.
Lifting the cube over her head and standing up once again, the woman noticed how tall GLaDOS was in her android body. "Maybe you should try too before we go down to old Aperture. You're a full 6 inches taller than me."
GLaDOS raised an eyebrow. "That's alright, I've already done the mathematics. The volume of a cube is exactly one cubic meter, and in a crouching position, I can easily fold myself to fit that space. Also, it's ok if our feet show. Those things have terrible eyesight and an incredibly low IQ, so as long as we do not make any unnecessary noise, they shouldn't notice we're there. In theory, at least."
The AI called an elevator to the main chamber and the door opened. After some trial and error, the human and the supercomputer realized that they would have to stack one cube on top of the other in order to fit inside. GLaDOS got in first, lifting the cube over her head and kneeling on the floor. Chell climbed on top of GLaDOS' cube and did the same. This worked out anyway, because old Aperture was swarming with mantis men, they had reason to believe the creatures would be right there outside the elevator when it reached the bottom. Already being in disguise would hopefully allow them to avoid a battle.
The lift began its long descent a few miles down to old Aperture. "Once we're down there, we need to be as quiet as possible. Just follow my lead and we should be fine." GLaDOS stated.
"I shouldn't have any trouble staying silent. YOU however might have a problem." Chell joked from inside her cube. It felt good to snark back at the AI.
"You're suggesting that I talk a lot. Well, if we account for the fact that I'm objectively brilliant and you're a human of average intelligence, I think we can count on you making noise first."
"Want to bet?" Chell smirked though GLaDOS couldn't see it.
"Alright. Whoever makes unnecessary noise first has to clean my entire chassis with a toothbrush. This will be very entertaining for me when you lose."
"No way, it'll be really funny for me when you have to climb on your own chassis with your android body and clean it with a toothbrush." Chell remarked.
"At least I could compute the scientifically most efficient way to do it." GLaDOS shot back.
Ten or so seconds later, the elevator came to a halt and the door opened. The bet was on. Since she was in the top cube, Chell hopped out of the elevator first, landing easily and soundlessly on her long fall boots. GLaDOS followed, moving to the front. The woman looked around through the circular cutouts in front of her and noticed mantis men scurrying around. Thankfully, they paid no attention to the human and that AI that their kind had battled just hours ago.
The pair moved up the fallen wall ramp and into the building they had previously not made it past. GLaDOS surveyed the area from her cube and had an exciting realization. There were old security cameras hanging up on the walls, and if she could just get up there, she could re-wire them and use them to spy on the happenings in old Aperture.
The obvious problem, however, was the fact that the place was swarming with mantis men and if the AI got out of the cube she was hiding in, they would surely attack her. GLaDOS decided to keep the tidbit of information somewhere at the back of her harddrive, and come back to it later. Maybe she could keep an eye out for more cameras as she and the former test subject explored the buildings of old Aperture. If there was one camera, surely there would be more.
Chell noticed that GLaDOS had paused, and wondered what she was thinking about. She didn't dare speak, however, as that would not only violate their bet, but also put them in danger.
Chell and GLaDOS continued on through the hallway of the ghostly office building. It was terribly dusty and everything looked outdated, as the area had been built in the late 1980s. Thankfully, the mantis who roamed the place did not notice the suspicious cubes moving seemingly by themselves through the area.
Eventually, the pair reached a door that read: WARNING. CONDEMNED AREA. FLAMMABLE CONTENTS. KEEP OUT. GLaDOS smiled inside her cube. She knew what was in that room, and that its contents could be an asset to them.
Conveniently, there were not any mantis men around at that moment, so GLaDOS lifted the cube over head, moved it aside, and stood up. She glanced around, then silently placed a finger over her silicone lips to discourage any verbal questions from Chell.
The AI did the obvious, and tried the handle first. Locked. She then noticed a keyhole. Now this I can work with, she thought. GLaDOS used the miniature thermal discouragement beam from her fingertip again to break the lock. After trying the handle again, the large metal door swung open. The android got back into her cube again, and she and the human shuffled into the room.
Considering the thick metal door with the scary sign on the front, one would have expected the room to be a gargantuan and treacherous test chamber, or a production line of some horrible chemical. Instead, the room was only about ten feet by ten feet, and it's only contents were boxes labeled 'Aperture Science Combustible Lemons'.
With the door closed and the human and the AI both safely out of the reach of oversized insects, Chell decided it was ok to speak in a hushed tone; "Combustible lemons? I can't believe it! I heard Cave Johnson talk about them in one of his recordings, but I didn't think he was at all serious!"
"He was always serious," GLaDOS replied. These can help us in our fight against the morons, just push the button on the side and throw one, and it'll explode on contact with any surface. Since all Aperture Science technologies remain safely operational at up to 4000 degrees Kelvin, and there are very few flammable surfaces inside of my facility, we don't need to worry too much about destroying the place." She pursed her lips at Chell. "For a third time."
Chell grabbed a small box of the combustible lemons and took a peek inside. The lemons were just a little bit smaller than real-life lemons. The box contained about 10 of the things, each with a small red button on the side. They had the texture of real lemons, but were made of metal and were painted yellow. They even had stems and leaves on top.
"Wow, they really went overboard." Chell mused.
"We do what we must because we can,"GLaDOS said with a proud smile. "Seriously though, grab a box of those things, we're going to need them. I'm going to try to rewire some cameras, and I'll need you to stay on watch."
"Ok, will do."
They each took a box of combustible lemons, and left the condemned lemon room. Sneaking slowly back through yet another room of office cubicles in their cubes, GLaDOS spotted her first camera. She began moving towards it, and Chell followed closely behind. The AI briefly got the corner of her cube stuck on a cubicle wall, and the woman failed to notice. Chell's cube bumped hard into GLaDOS'.
"Watch where you're going." The AI hissed far louder than she should have at Chell.
The human grinned widely. "HA! You made unnecessary noise! You'll have to clean your own chassis with a toothbrush!"
The heads of every mantis in the room turned almost synchronously, towards the two previously unnoticed cubes, and they started running towards them.
"Get out of your cube, we have to fight!" GLaDOS shouted.
Chell was alarmed. She hadn't brought the portal gun because she didn't really need it down here, and it would just get in the way under the cube. She was unarmed except for the combustible lemons. Flipping over the cube and tossing it aside, she assessed her surroundings the way she would have in a test chamber. The woman spotted the door immediately with a big red, neon exit sign hanging above it. Unfortunately, mantis men were charging her and the android from all sides. She would have to think fast to defend herself. GLaDOS could easily hold her own with that titanium skeleton of hers, but Chell was a human being with flesh and blood and plugging herself into a machine would not heal her the way it would the AI.
The woman picked up an old tube computer monitor, and flung it at the nearest mantis, knocking it off its feet. These things could do damage but only from close up. They were somewhat fragile and throwing projectiles seemed like the best way to keep them at bay.
Projectiles! Chell opened the box which had been previously tucked under her left arm, and grabbed a combustible lemon. She pressed the red button, and threw it at a group of mantis which were climbing over cubicle walls to try to get at her. They were blown to bits instantly in a satisfying, but otherwise harmless explosion.
GLaDOS, Chell noticed, was headed for the security camera hanging in the corner of the room, using brute force to push her way through the giant insects. "Hold them off while I rewire this camera!"
Chell thought it was silly that she, the far more fragile one, should have to fight while the practically immortal android fiddled around with technology, but there was no time for arguing. Besides, Chell didn't have any idea how to do whatever it was that GLaDOS thought she was doing. More mantis were pouring into the room from the hallway, seemingly intrigued by the sounds of commotion. The human just tossed combustible lemons at them and tried to catch them in groups to do the most possible damage.
It was kind of fun.
"Heck yeah!" Chell shouted, high off adrenaline and self-preservation, "This place about to blow!" She reached down into the box for another lemon, but found nothing. The blood drained from her face. "Uh oh."
Five mantis from the hall came charging in, and the woman had to think fast. She grabbed an old crowbar off a desk and hoped it would do the job. Why there was a crowbar in what had been an office building, she didn't know, but at least it made for a viable weapon. The five creatures charged her as a group, hissing and raising their claws. Chell, who had battled hundreds of turrets, avoided countless acid lakes and bottomless pits, and had killed GLaDOS herself, was intimidated.
She swung the rusty crowbar as confidently as possible, knocking the claws off one mantis. She ducked to avoid an attack from another, and then stabbed another mantis with the crowbar, killing it.
Unfortunately, the woman couldn't get the makeshift weapon out of the body of the fallen insect. She panicked, as there were three other clawed mantis who were moving towards her seemingly in dramatic slow motion. What was taking GLaDOS so long?
Chell turned her head and saw the android still working away on the same camera. Desperate, she called out "GLaDOS!" but it was too late. She felt a mantis claw close around her arm and slice through the skin. She cried out in pain and ripped her arm out of the creature's grasp and ran. Blood poured from the deep wound.
Chell's vision became hazy and the room spun due to the blood loss. She passed out, and the last thing she heard was GLaDOS' mechanical voice crying out; "Chell!" That was the first time she had ever heard the supercomputer say her name…
I've been leaving song lyric easter eggs in the last 2 chapters, did you find them? There was a Portal song and two 2000s pop songs!